Dennis Rasmussen posted:MORPHEUS: The Matrix is everywhere, it's all around us, here even in this room. You can see it out your window or on your television. You feel it when you go to work, or go to church or pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. |
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# ? Jul 16, 2014 04:02 |
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# ? May 9, 2024 01:44 |
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JERRY, SID, and ARF are sitting at their favorite booth in Julio's Luncheonette. JERRY: OK, OK, so the problem is... SID: He keeps sayin- ARF, interrupting: FYAD SID, angry: Uhhhhh, who let him in here anyway? I'm leaving. LEAVING. I DON'T NEED THIS. SID stands and grabs his coat. SID: Honestly, it really doesn't get to me, I'm above it. ARF: FYAD SID: gently caress OFF. SID storms out of the Luncheonette. ARF: FYAD |
# ? Jul 16, 2014 18:29 |
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lol |
# ? Jul 16, 2014 18:30 |
Dennis Rasmussen posted:not bad. Kramer isn't a doctor though; far from it. Let's try to work out the basic formula: Elain, George or Jerry are talking about something that annoyed them, some little facet in life many people might be able to relate to, but generally wouldn't make as big a deal out of it. It's generally George relating the problem; Jerry agreeing, but it can go both ways or even be Elaine. Kramer generally interjects randomly into the scene, with a kooky situation that the rest of the cast can react to (generally just Jerry, though). Kramer is prone to crazy, impulsive ideas, get rich schemes, ridiculous romance plans, and his apartment is a wreck, but he's always sure he has the right idea. thanks i will try again. Jerry and George are headed to Canada in a car. George is driving. george: im telling you! they keep cutting me off over there. jerry: what are you talking about, canadians are great. george: they are a great nation, but they are all terrible drivers! jerry: how often do you go to canada? george: once a month to visit kramer jerry surprised : he lives up there now?! george: elaine died jerry, and kramer couldnt save her. you have to realize that. jerry: if kramers there.. whos been knocking down my door! |
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# ? Jul 16, 2014 22:57 |
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my new dog posted:thanks i will try again. Funny but touching at the same time. More somber than the rest but you can't help but laugh to imagine those zany characters in this kind of situation. Great work imo. |
# ? Jul 16, 2014 23:04 |
my new dog posted:thanks i will try again. this is good but in the series at least 1 of them would be taking sick hits of a bong....... |
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# ? Jul 17, 2014 09:37 |
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Canned Laughter: *laughter!* |
# ? Jul 17, 2014 10:30 |
James Trickington posted:Canned Laughter: *laughter!* hahahahaha loving BLAZE IT |
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# ? Jul 17, 2014 10:34 |
Grey Skies posted:GEORGE: hahahahaha loving BLAZE IT |
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# ? Jul 17, 2014 13:36 |
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Jerry's hanging out in his apartment eating cereal. He hears a buzz on the intercom. Jerry: Who is it? George: It's George. Jerry: Alright. Jerry presses the button allowing George entry. He eats more cereal. George comes through the door wearing a fedora. George: Well? What do you think? Jerry: What is this supposed to be? George: It's a hat! A fedora! Doesn't it look cool? Jerry: Cool isn't the word I was looking for. George: Don't you think the fedora just epitomizes that cool, old-school fashion sensibility? I feel like a different person! Wearin' it's like, like I'm Indiana Jones! Jerry: I think the difference between you and Indiana Jones goes much further than your choice of headwear. |
# ? Jul 17, 2014 18:40 |
Grey Skies posted:this is good but in the series at least 1 of them would be taking sick hits of a bong....... Georges apt., very dark and w newspaper clippings all over the walls. they all relate to elaines accident and dr kramers attempts to save her life. a knock on the door! George (very stoned and drunk): what who is it!! Unknown voice: open the door, there is still time George (stoned drunk and angry): Who is it!!!! No answer. Suddenly a loud bang. They are knocking the door down George (to self): this is the day i die (puffs marijuana joint) The door gives in and in bursts dr kramer holding a lifeless elaine, just like that terrible day. Dr. kramer: wake up, george |
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# ? Jul 17, 2014 18:51 |
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[Elaine enters the apartment.] Elaine: So. I had a, uh, date. Jerry: Oh yeah? How did it go? Elaine: Well. We were talking and when he went to the bathroom I noticed his laptop was on. Jerry: No way! Elaine: So I snooped around and found a, uh, folder. Jerry: *feigns shock* Not a folder! Elaine: Turns out he was a Brony. Jerry: Brony? Elaine: Yep. [Kramer slides in humming the opening theme to MLP: Friendship is Magic] |
# ? Jul 17, 2014 18:57 |
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(Kramer slides into Jerry's apartment.) Kramer: Im gay |
# ? Jul 17, 2014 19:00 |
[A man is inside Jerry's apartment, waxing the floor.] JERRY: So, a "waxman"? Is that what they call you? [The waxing guy stops, stares at Jerry for a few seconds, and then goes back to waxing.] JERRY: Do you wax people's bodies too or just floors? [The waxing guy just shakes his head, not even looking up.] JERRY (talking to himself): I could really use a good wax. ... Kramer too, now that I think about it. [As if on cue, Kramer swings open the door and slides in. But due to the floor wax, he continues to slide all the way across the room while making a silly WHOOOOOOA noise.] KRAMER (while sliding): "WHOOOOOOA" [Kramer reaches the end of the room and falls out the window.] JERRY: Speak of the devil. |
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# ? Jul 17, 2014 23:58 |
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my new dog posted:Georges apt., very dark and w newspaper clippings all over the walls. they all relate to elaines accident and dr kramers attempts to save her life. I gotta know where this is going. Why does George feel so guilty? What did Dr. Kramer fail to do? Don't leave me hanging, my new dog. |
# ? Jul 18, 2014 00:23 |
Dennis Rasmussen posted:I gotta know where this is going. Why does George feel so guilty? What did Dr. Kramer fail to do? Don't leave me hanging, my new dog. idk im too tired to figure it out |
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# ? Jul 18, 2014 00:58 |
goldmine this before i make another idiot post | |
# ? Jul 18, 2014 00:59 |
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my new dog posted:goldmine this before i make another idiot post same |
# ? Jul 18, 2014 01:54 |
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Jerry |
# ? Jul 18, 2014 01:54 |
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George enters Jerry's Apartment. GEORGE: Banned! JERRY: *drinks a sip of coffee* *audience laughs* GEORGE: Banned, Jerry! JERRY: So what, just re-reg. GEORGE: Re-reg, Jerry? Re-reg?! This is an outrage! I won't even have my avatar anymore! JERRY: Well I'm sure there's been a good reason. GEORGE: Reason?! You can't just ban somebody! It's unfair, Jerry, unfair! JERRY: *takes another sip* *audience laughs* GEORGE: Well, alright, maybe, just maybe *mumbles* I did get a little out of line. JERRY: Oh, what was that? GEORGE: I got a little out of line! Alright? I admit it. Are you happy now Jerry? JERRY: Well I can't say i'm happy. But I'm glad you adm- Kramer frantically enters the apartment KRAMER: Jerry! George! You won't believe it. Cmon, cmon you gotta see this! Kramer rushes over to the PC and enters his login. KRAMER: Here, and there. Alright, there! JERRY: What am I supposed to look at here? KRAMER: The Star! The little star! Right there, where it says kramerkramerkramer GEORGE: NO! JERRY: kramerkramerkramer? KRAMER: It's a nickname Jerry! GEORGE: I can't believe this! George rushes out of the apartment. Kramer shrugs, Jerry shrugs. JERRY: So what, you're a moderator? KRAMER: Ooooooh that's gotta be it! KRAMER: Oh look I got a new message! Live's crazy as a moderator, Jerry! New message from George: ASFKGAJLJSIROGMAFKPOGJRBHIJPOGAKFOGHRIJPGAFKOGRSIHJGPAKFORJPGOKAC |
# ? Jul 18, 2014 08:59 |
JERRY: Hey George how about them niggers and kikes GEORGE: HE COMES JERRY: ZALGO |
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# ? Jul 18, 2014 12:59 |
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*JERRY and GEORGE sit down for lunch* JERRY: So what's the big deal? Why was it so important that we meet immediately? GEORGE: It's finally happened Jerry, I've finally done it. After years of failure and misery, it's happening! It's happening Jerry! JERRY: What's happening? GEORGE: I'm giddy, I'm so excited! JERRY (after eye roll): Spit it out, Costanza. GEORGE: It's the one. I've finally found the one! JERRY: Oh my god, George, that's great! When do I meet her? GEORGE: Well, uh...(takes deep breath) Well, that's complicated. JERRY: Complicated? I just want to meet the girl of your dreams, what's so complicated? GEORGE: Well, that's the thing of it. You can't meet her. JERRY: I can't believe this. you've finally met "The One" and I can't even meet her? What is this? GEORGE: Alright, alright, laugh it up. Jerry, I'm going to level with you. JERRY: That's very big of you. GEORGE: I haven't met her yet. JERRY: How can she be the one if you haven't even met her yet? This is unbelievable. GEORGE: She's the one Jerry, I know it! I've been following her posts for a while now and we've really hit it off! She's funny and caring and is really health conscious! Shes perfect! JERRY: How do you even know she's a she? GEORGE: *pause* It's funny you mention that. JERRY: Oh no, what now? GEORGE: She's in transition. JERRY: Okay. *stands up with hands off gesture* Okay. GEORGE: What? I come to you with great news, that I'm in love, that I'm happy, and this is what I get? I'd really like your support on this, Jerry. JERRY: I bet, I just bet. Goodbye, George. *begins to walk off* GEORGE: *shouting* You'll see! I'm gonna be night crew, I'm gonna be happy! |
# ? Jul 18, 2014 15:45 |
JERRY: You can't wear pink and green at the same time. Who does that? GEORGE: Yeah, well... let me just check this thread and then I gotta go. *at computer* Unbelievable! Unbelievable! You want to ban me!? JERRY: George you need to stop it with those forums. They're not good for you. GEORGE: These mods are garbage! Wait...I got it! [runs out apartment] [George running manically down the street cussing] [George gets to another apartment complex] [Pushes elevator button three times rapidly] GEORGE: Gah!!!! [George runs up stairs] [camera shot from inside of apartment] [knock on the door] NEWMAN: George? GEORGE: They banned me! NEWMAN: [grinning] You don't say? GEORGE: They banned you, too. Right?! NEWMAN: [smile turns into dark frown] That was, a long time ago. GEORGE: I want to fight back! I want to start something else! Call it, call it somethingsensitive.com! |
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# ? Jul 18, 2014 18:07 |
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# ? May 9, 2024 01:44 |
Dennis Rasmussen posted:MORPHEUS: The Matrix is everywhere, it's all around us, here even in this room. You can see it out your window or on your television. You feel it when you go to work, or go to church or pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. |
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# ? Jul 18, 2014 18:20 |