- Prof. Crocodile
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"I've had it up to here, Claus! I want your hat and candy cane on my desk first thing in the morning!"
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Dec 17, 2020 02:06
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 2, 2024 04:51
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Santa's sleigh screaming down Lombard street in pursuit of a pea-green Plymouth Valiant full of bad girls and boys, as a funk song plays in the background.
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Dec 17, 2020 02:07
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- Prof. Crocodile
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"I just got off the phone with city hall, Claus. That kid you gave a lump of coal to? HIS FATHER IS THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY!"
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Dec 17, 2020 02:08
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- google THIS
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Chocolate CHiPs
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Dec 17, 2020 03:29
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- nut
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and just how many drug busts have you found in these chimneys huh
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Dec 17, 2020 14:24
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Santa: Chief, I need to secure a couple billion warrants tonight so I can enter every household in the world.
Chief: Why on earth should I give you that?
Santa: I have probable Clause
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Dec 17, 2020 16:02
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- Escape From Noise
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Listen Santa Clause. I'm giving you a new partner!
[Rudolph enters the office]
And try not to get this one killed!
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Dec 17, 2020 17:28
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- Escape From Noise
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[Picks up dradel and squeezes it in his mittened hand]
Just as I suspected! My evil twin, Chanuklaus!
Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 18:17 on Dec 17, 2020
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Dec 17, 2020 17:30
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- Escape From Noise
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Santa and Krampus pulling the good cop/bad cop routine on a suspected naughty child
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Dec 17, 2020 17:32
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Santa's Journal. December 24th, 1985:
Black soot in chimney this morning, yule logs on burnt hearth. This town is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended Christmas trees and the trees are full of hope and when the presents finally arrive, all the children will frown. The accumulated coal of all their naughtiness will build up about their waists and all the boys and girls will look up and shout "Put us on the nice list!"...
...and I'll look down, and whisper "ho."
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Dec 17, 2020 18:13
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- google THIS
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Santa's Journal. December 24th, 1985:
Black soot in chimney this morning, yule logs on burnt hearth. This town is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended Christmas trees and the trees are full of hope and when the presents finally arrive, all the children will frown. The accumulated coal of all their naughtiness will build up about their waists and all the boys and girls will look up and shout "Put us on the nice list!"...
...and I'll look down, and whisper "ho."
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Dec 17, 2020 18:45
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- alnilam
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Santa's Journal. December 24th, 1985:
Black soot in chimney this morning, yule logs on burnt hearth. This town is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended Christmas trees and the trees are full of hope and when the presents finally arrive, all the children will frown. The accumulated coal of all their naughtiness will build up about their waists and all the boys and girls will look up and shout "Put us on the nice list!"...
...and I'll look down, and whisper "ho."
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Dec 17, 2020 20:29
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Santa takes off his sunglasses as he looks down at a duffel bag of amazon gift cards sitting next to a chalk outline.
"So much for our Prime suspect."
YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
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Dec 17, 2020 23:59
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- google THIS
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Rudolph, with your nose so bright, won't you light my squad car tonight? I need you too Horace, the Elf Who Can Make a Really Good Siren Noise.
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Dec 22, 2020 20:41
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- The Klowner
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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you're probably also going to need Hplodur, the Blue-Nosed Reindeer
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Dec 22, 2020 21:42
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Santa putting terry's chocolate oranges in a Christmas stocking as he prepares to rough up a suspect, as Krampus stands in front of the camera in the interview room.
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Dec 23, 2020 03:46
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- Khanstant
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Thanks Rudolph, thanks to your undercover efforts and that very shiny nose, none of these other reindeer will have to toil under that redcap bastard claus ever again.
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Dec 25, 2020 17:21
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- Prurient Squid
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Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
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drat it Santa, we had the Gingerbread man dead to rights. We'd been staking out his gingerbread house for months till your warrantless search made the "special sugar" inadmissable.
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Dec 27, 2020 11:49
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- Escape From Noise
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Listen, you son of a bitch! You can't go blowing my fuckin' cover like that! I'm working undercover! I'm secret Santa!
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Dec 27, 2020 12:01
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Listen, you son of a bitch! You can't go blowing my fuckin' cover like that! I'm working undercover! I'm secret Santa!
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Dec 28, 2020 16:10
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 2, 2024 04:51
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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Yo' man, release me, I ain't done nothing wrong!
Give it up, our forensics found your name all over the naughty list, you're going in for a long time son.
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Dec 28, 2020 18:12
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