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Cultists use our superdraft picks to challenge for the mystery box
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Sep 22, 2012 01:45
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The Super-League VII Challenge Series Contest: Your Smasher Sanity Depreciation Station So, you've gone through the dispersal draft, or you want to fix your mediocre returning team, and you're one piece away from greatness. Oh, you could wait for the Super-Draft around the midpoint of the season, but can you afford to wait? Well, if you're willing to take a risk, then maybe I can help you out... Here's how the challenge works. You put up your Super-Draft picks, or an equivalent consideration, and choose which level of challenge you want to face. You win, you get a player from that tier of prizes, you lose, I take your draft picks or whatever it is you put up. And, of course, there's nothing really stopping you from challenging more than once... To win, all you have to do is win a best-of-seven series against one of the teams listed under your chosen level of the challenge. Which team you'll be challenging will be randomly selected, so you won't know which one you'll be facing. One-Star Challenges (*) Winnable, but not automatic Possible Teams Anchorage Penguins Atlantis Unspecifieds Atlantis Aquamen (SLVI) Boston Crabs (SLIV) Boston Crabs (SLVI) Brooklyn Bombers (SLII) Brooklyn Bombers (SLIV) Brooklyn Bronies California Unspecifieds (0-1) Cleveland Communists (1-0) Des Moines Dervishes (SLIV) Dorchester Phantoms East St. Louis Electrics (0-1) Falmouth Clippers (0-1) Free Country Fhqwhgads Greater Googly-Mooglies Hakata Runnin' Ramen Hill Valley Biffs Jackson Jerks of Mississippi Jerk City Philosophers Kodak Googles Kolkata Indians (0-1) Las Vegas Gamblers (0-1) London Calling (1-0) Motor City Bengals Newport Sharks (SLI) Newport Sharks (SLII) #OccupySuperLeague Philadelphia Longshots Rockford Losers (SLIII) (1-0) San Francisco Clues Seattle Homers (1-0) Senadores de San Juan (SLII) Stevie Mitch Specials (1-0) Toronto Ravens Vancouver Loonies (0-1) Rewards 1B - '08 Carlos Delgado (SES) 2B - '07 Dustin Pedroia (SES) 3B - '37 Red Rolfe (ATA) RF - '18 Ross Youngs (DES) DH - '09 Mark Reynolds (LAV) SP - '70 Catfish Hunter (NNY/MLD) SP - '79 Phil Niekro (HAK) SP - '87 Jimmy loving Key (DED) SP - '26 Urban Shocker (SLA/DOR) RP - '86 Jesse Orosco (LEP) RP - '99 Jason Isringhausen (EVV) Two-Star Challenges (**) The teams aren't so good, but neither are the players. Possible Teams Baltimore Blind Men (0-2) Cleveland Unicorns (SLI) (0-2) Des Moine Dervishes (SLII) (0-2) EV-IL Corp. Villains (1-0) Greenbrier Orchids Idaho Potatoes (1-0) Mid-Northern Suicidal Tendencies Mudville Masochists (0-1) Paris Postmodernists (1-0) San Diego Freewheelers (0-1) Senadores de San Juan (SLI) (0-1) Silicon Valley Wanzers (1-0) Tigres de San Juan Rewards C - '73 Thurman Munson (VAN/SES) 1B - '05 Ryan Howard (FRA/PRO) 2B - '85 Julio Franco (PRO) 3B - '02 Aramis Ramirez (IDA) IF - '91 Matt Williams (OCC) CF - '79 Dale Murphy (HAK) RF - '97 Sammy Sosa (DER) DH - '02 Ed Delahanty (MID) SP - '21 George Uhle (DES) SP - '90 Kevin Brown (SFC/PRO) RP - '02 Chad Bradford (As seen in Moneyball (PHL) RP - '94 John Wetteland (HAK) Three-Star Challenges (***) Solid fights for solid players. Possible Teams Atlantis Aquamen (SLIII-SLIV) (1-0) Angel Grove Power Rangers (0-1) Boston Crabs (SLI-SLII) (0-1) Chicago Dinger-Machines (0-1) Deadwood Cutthroats (0-1) Detroit Riots (0-1) Detroit Original Riots (1-1) Detroit Switchblades (1-1) Honolulu Lava Flows Juneau Juggernauts (SLI) Leprechauns (1-0) Milwaukee Drinkers (0-1) New New York Fighting Mongooses (1-0) New Orleans Hurricanes (1-0) Omaha Forgettables (SLIII) Omaha Forgettables (SLV) Oyster Cult Blues (0-1) Petaluma Goose Eggs (1-0) Rewards C - '22 Gabby Hartnett (GRE/GAN) 1B - '85 Don Mattingly (NNY/VIR) 3B - '82 Paul Molitor (GRE) LF - '81 Tim Raines (GAN) RF - '70 Reggie Jackson (NNY/DER) DH - '39 Hank Greenberg (DER) SP - '50 Robin Roberts (PHL) SP - '62 Gaylord Perry (SES) SP - '90 Randy Johnson (CLU/DER) RP - '05 Billy Wagner (FRA/SES) RP - '89 John Franco (SES) Four-Star Challenges (****) How much are you willing to risk for a star player? Possible Teams Chicago Blood Sox (2-1) Framingham Fillies (1-1) Newport Sharks (SLV-SLVI) Queens Mercuries (0-2) Providence Murderbots (1-2) Seattle SuperSonics Virginia City Vigilantes (1-2) Rewards C - '99 Mike Piazza (EVV) 1B - '64 Harmon Killebrew (SES) 2B - '69 Joe Morgan (LEP) 3B - '83 George Brett (BLI/CHB) LF - '67 Carl Yastrzemski (PHL) CF - '18 Ty Cobb (DOR) RF - '92 Tony Gwynn (LEP) SP - '03 Rube Waddell (SES) SP - '03 Eddie Plank (NEW/PRO) SP - '12 Christy Mathewson (SES) SP - '59 Bob Gibson (SES) RP - '84 Dan Quisenberry (BLI) RP - '98 Trevor Hoffman (VAN) Five-Star Challenges (*****) You're probably not going to win...but what if you did? Possible Teams Boston Skyhawks (5-0) Gander Doppel-Bangers (2-2) Rewards C - '75 Johnny Bench (MID) 1B - '37 Lou Gehrig (ATA) 2B - '21 Rogers Hornsby (DEM) 3B - '80 Mike Schmidt (BSC) SS - '?? Pop Lloyd (IDA) CF - '37 Joe DiMaggio (ATA) RF - '58 Hank Aaron (DEM) DH - '20 Babe loving Ruth (QUE) SP - '16 Walter Johnson (ATA) SP - '00 Randy Johnson (PRP) SP - '04 Ed Walsh (CHB) SP - '93 Roger Clemens (BSC) RP - '01 Mariano Rivera (CLU/PRO) RP - '77 Bruce Sutter (KOL/LEP) Smasher Dynamo fucked around with this message at 23:25 on Sep 22, 2012 |
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Sep 22, 2012 01:47
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 Man, these challenges are a blast. I saw my old Mooglies take on a couple of teams that thought they could pick up some easy additions, and whammo! Knocked their drat teeth out. Heh...err, let's just hope that doesn't happen to us. The Great Googly-Mooglies issue the following challenges: The Mooglies' first round Super Draft pick and the second-round pick we didn't trade to the Cultists (whichever of the Saints' or Mooglies' is higher) on a * challenge for 1989 Ozzie Smith The Saints' first round Super Draft pick and 2011 Santiago Casilla on a ** challenge for 2010 Ryan Braun 1968 Dick McAuliffe and 2011 Alex Avila on a ** challenge for 2001 Mike Mussina
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Sep 22, 2012 03:19
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The Rated R Superstars bid their Super Draft picks to make a * challenge for 1985 Howard Johnson.
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Sep 22, 2012 03:34
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The Goog posted:The Rated R Superstars bid their Super Draft picks to make a * challenge for 1985 Howard Johnson. As 34% owner of the Superstars, I approve this challenge.
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Sep 22, 2012 03:51
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The Goog posted:The Rated R Superstars bid their Super Draft picks to make a * challenge for 1985 Howard Johnson. Does this also include horrifying experiences at Howard Johnson hotels???
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Sep 22, 2012 03:52
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The Portland Bulldogs bid 1978 John Candelaria and 1984 Howard Johnson to make a *-challenge for 1965 Frank Howard
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Sep 22, 2012 04:25
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The Dubai Dervishes put down 1973 Pete Rose and their second round Super Draft pick for **** '95 Alex Rodriguez.
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Sep 22, 2012 05:28
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Hey, jerks! Look at this! The Dynamo League is ready!  
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Sep 22, 2012 06:42
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K-Rod and Venters for JUN Jason Kendall.
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Sep 22, 2012 22:04
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 Cultist Lineup for the Challenges Pitching is the same as the regular roster. I'm assuming fatigue isn't an issue Position Players vs Right Handed Pitchers C. Rodríguez, Iván "Pudge" 29 (2001 Texas Rangers) 1B. Foxx, Jimmie "Double X" 27 (1935 Phillie Athletics) 2B. Hornsby, Rodgers "Rajah" 33 (1930 Chicago Cubs) 3B. Santo, Ron 24 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics, Super Draft) SS. Banks, Ernie "Mr Cub" 27 (1958 Chicago Cubs) LF. Williams, Billy 26 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics Super Draft) CF. Tris, Speaker "Grey Eagle" 23 (1911 Boston Red Sox) RF. Walker, Larry 30 (1997 Colorado Rockies) DH. Musial, Stan "The Man" 38 (1959 Cardinals) Batting Order vs Right Handed Pitchers 1 Tris, Speaker 23 (1911 Boston Red Sox) - Left 2 Hornsby, Rodgers 33 (1930 Chicago Cubs) - Right 3 Musial, Stan "The Man" 38 (1959 Cardinals) - Left 4 Foxx, Jimmie 27 (1935 Phillie Athletics) - Right 5 Williams, Billy 26 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics) - Left 6 Banks, Ernie 27 (1958 Chicago Cubs) - Right 7 Walker, Larry 30 (1997 Colorado Rockies) - Left 8 Rodríguez, Iván "Pudge" 29 (2001 Texas Rangers) - Right (Gabby has some starts) 9 Santo, Ron 24 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics) - Right Position Players vs Left Handed Pitchers C. Hartnett, Gabby 29 (1930 Chicago Cubs) 1B. Foxx, Jimmie "Double X" 27 (1935 Phillie Athletics) 2B. Hornsby, Rodgers "Rajah" 33 (1930 Chicago Cubs 3B. Santo, Ron 24 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics, Super Draft) SS. Banks, Ernie "Mr Cub" 27 (1958 Chicago Cubs) LF. Riggs, Stephenson (LF) 32 (1930 Chicago Cubs) CF. Speaker, Tris "Grey Eagle" 23 (1911 Boston Red Sox) RF. Cuyler, Kiki "Shirley" 31 (1930 Chicago Cubs) DH. Musial, Stan "The Man" 38 (1959 Cardinals) Bench vs Left Handed Pitchers Bench 1. Rodríguez, Iván "Pudge" 29 (2001 Texas Rangers) Bench 2. Walker, Larry 30 (1997 Colorado Rockies) Bench 3. Williams, Billy 26 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics Super Draft) Bench 4. Musial, Stan "The Man" 38 (1959 Cardinals) Bench 5. Nomar Gaspacio (2004 Chicago Cubs) Batting Order vs Left Handed Pitchers 1 Tris, Speaker 23 (1911 Boston Red Sox) - Left 2 Hornsby, Rodgers 33 (1930 Chicago Cubs) - Right 3 Musial, Stan "The Man" 38 (1959 Cardinals) 4 Foxx, Jimmie 27 (1935 Phillie Athletics) - Right 5 Banks, Ernie 27 (1958 Chicago Cubs) - Right 6 Kiki, Cuyler "Shirley" 31 (1930 Chicago Cubs) 7 Hartnett, Gabby 29 (1930 Chicago Cubs) - Right (Irod will have some starts) 8 Santo, Ron 24 1964 (Cubs, via Electrics) - Right 9 Riggs, Stephenson (LF) 32 (1930 Chicago Cubs)
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Sep 23, 2012 01:48
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I posted my roster, Cthulhu. Let's talk Sweet Lou.
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Sep 23, 2012 02:03
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cbx posted:I posted my roster, Cthulhu. Let's talk Sweet Lou. Where I can I get the years on your dudes?
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Sep 23, 2012 04:09
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Just ask me. I have the years in the roster file but I'm too lazy to post them all right now.
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Sep 23, 2012 04:11
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cbx posted:Just ask me. I have the years in the roster file but I'm too lazy to post them all right now. Oh, can I get you to email it to me then? firstpartofusername.lastpartofusername@gmail.com
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Sep 23, 2012 04:29
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Dynamo League Injury Report! No new champions Antarctica Unspecifieds Doug Fister (SP) (Re-re-education!) - 13 days Barrow Daydreamers Oscar Gamble (OF) (Broken Finger) - 8 days Fukuoka Finger-Bangers Juan Guzman (SP) (Acceptable Losses) - 25 days Rochester Generics Kent Mercker (RP) (Coupon for elective shoulder surgery!) - 7 days St. Paul Bearers Ted Simmons (C) (Mandible Clawed!) - 24 days
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Sep 23, 2012 04:38
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Use Grimes to start for Fister while he's out
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Sep 23, 2012 05:06
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Look, fellas, I want to be straight with you. The Mooglies...well, they haven't gone quite as long without playing ball as I've led you to believe. Obviously I brought back Cliff and Eddie and...who was the third guy? Ah, it doesn't matter. I brought back those guys when I did that whole "greater" Mooglies thing, but this is different. You see, when I hopped on my Pegasus and rode back to the Palace of Googopolis after the Greater Mooglies failed, I was despondent. We all were. And then I got bitter, and jealous. So I gathered together a few teams of my own, trying to recreate the feel of the old Super League. It was tough, finding guys willing to travel through the heavens just to play baseball for my own personal amusement, but we cobbled together enough of a following that the people started turning out in numbers. And even on a planet of rock a hundred trillion miles away from this world, when there are enough people who want to watch something, they'll put it on television. And there will be contracts. So when the suits had had their say, they divided the teams into two leagues: There was the ABBA League, who played their games on Channel 1, and the Zeppelin League, on Channel 693. At the end of the year, my Mooglies took on a team that called themselves the "Free-riding Funksters of Greater Googopolis." It was a joke, really; we beat them in four games, and the only run they scored came when Cliff Lee tried to pitch back-to-back games righthanded. They crowned us the "television champions," whatever that meant, and immediately started working on the next season. Seeing that sad excuse for baseball had me itching to get back in the Super League, though, and so I came back to this plane of existence and brought forth the London Calling. After they were turned away, I didn't want anything to do with baseball for a while. Without the Mooglies, the television league crumbled; they never even crowned a second champion. The league seemed destined to fade away, never to be thought of again, but the gods of rock had other thoughts. When I brought the Mooglies back to Earth and called forth the Royal Palace of Googopolis to host our home games, I brought the royal servants along with me. When I did, one of the janitors came to me and said, "Hey, tough guy! I found this title just lying around in some trash, see? I figured maybe you, ese, should have it. Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta...GOOOOOO!" He's a weird fella, I'm not gonna lie. Incredible with a 2x4, though. Anyway, I held the belt in my hands, and the memories flooded back to me. It might just be a crappy piece of tin to you, but to me and the Mooglies, this belt represents the struggle we endured just to get back to the Super League. We will carry it--and defend it--with pride. I hereby declare the Great Googly-Mooglies the first ever Super League Television Champions!
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Sep 23, 2012 05:29
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 I propose that Martinez steps in to cover for Simmons for the duration of his injury, and that a trade or loan deal be made for another back-up catcher. So as to avoid rumours of bias, I am not proposing a deal, but I am making it known that I have Daulton and Roseboro as spares.
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Sep 23, 2012 10:34
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Smasher Dynamo posted:Barrow Daydreamers I think this neatly fits into the "oh well" category. Continue as you were, guys. Also, the EC6 banners:   
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Sep 23, 2012 10:46
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 Super-League VII, Dynamo League Week 1: Life, Love, and the Pursuit of Frank Howard      Analysis I don't think anyone's lineup improved more from their first iteration more than the Unspecifieds. I still don't like Paul Waner, who isn't really a center fielder. I also have some misgivings about Grimes that have to do with the quality of defense behind him. These are things you should keep your eye on.      Analysis You have a lot more faith in Joe Matlack than I do. A lot more.      Analysis Now that Eddie Mathews is back, I'm not sure what you're going to be doing with Matt Williams and Chipper Jones, especially since the Imperialists aren't going to play any games with the DH unless they make the finals.      Analysis It's the Unicorns. They are who they are.      Analysis Unfortunately, I think that Ozzie Smith's offensive performance is all downhill from here.      Analysis I had expected the myth of the invincible Postmodernists to last a bit longer, but the Oranges just lined up their big bats and mowed them down. Brutal.      Analysis The Bangers never do start well, do they?      Analysis Detective Don Slaught is hitting .833! MVP!      Analysis Based on one week, I don't think the Radbourns' plan of not using starters is going to go well. In fact, I think they're going to lose 100 games. Still, I might be wrong...though I doubt it.      Analysis Singles and stolen bases are all well and good until you face the Bonds/Pujols combination, and you realize that all of those sabermetricians were right all along.      Analysis Best record in the league! Three complete games in a row! If the season ended today, the Bulldogs would have homefield advantage throughout the playoffs. Of course, we do have 25 weeks to go, so that's probably not going to happen. Oh, and I know the lineup is a bit messed up in the screenshot, but it's working as it should be in reality.      Analysis John's two strikeouts in his first start are probably going to be his season-high.      Analysis You never posted your lineup for this season, so I reconstructed it the best I could.      Analysis Man, what the gently caress is with your pitching coach? Five innings for Paige and Ryan, and then he lets Drysdale pitch into the ninth even though he's getting hammered.      Analysis Not exactly best in the world.      Analysis Better round up the owners and figure out exactly what you guys are going to do about this one.     Games of the Week Don May posted:
Box Score   Don May posted:
Box Score   Don May posted:
Box Score   Super-League Challenge!  : Welcome back to a new season of the Super-League Challenge, where teams put their picks and players on the line for a chance to upgrade their rosters. I'm Smasher Dynamo, with me, as always, is Eri Yoshida. : Hey, Smasher, remember how last season I was worried that I didn't really exist?: No. : Oh. Well, do you want to hear about how was able to convince myself that I really did exist?: Not really. Anyway, our first challenge from the season comes from the Florida Oranges and they'll face the...the first Idaho Potatoes.: The Potatoes had Pop Lloyd and uh...problems. The Following is a Two-Star Challenge. If the Oranges win, they will receive '94 Pedro Martinez. If they lose, they will forfeit Andy Van Slyke and Rico Petrocell and Pat Collins.   : And the Tots will take Game 1.: The Potatoes have been pretty good in these challenges in the past, it'll be interesting to see if they can hold off a team as good as the Oranges.  : Oranges tie it up as Bob Welch of all people throws a complete game.: Bob Welch has also been pretty good in the Super-League, which is odd, since he was pretty mediocre at best in real life.  : Taters take Game 3. Not a big surprise with Greg Maddux on the mound. Maddux was the Cy Young winner in Super-League IV.  : And the Potatoes take another, and they have a 3-1 series lead, and this looks like it's about over for the Oranges.: I don't know, Smasher, Florida is great at comebacks, like the 2003 Marlins who came back from-: No more talking!   : Falkenberg with the win to keep the Oranges alive.  : And Cone comes through with another win, and there will be a Game 7! : Hey, isn't Martinez more than a two-star pitcher? : In '94? No, too young.  : And the Oranges will win '94 Pedro Martinez, I'm sure he'll help them a lot. Or maybe he'll kill them. Who knows?: You seem angrier than usual.: Bah! Next challenge! It's the Rochester Generics against the...Motor City Bengals!: The Bengals were owned by cbx up until he used an alt account to create another team in a confusing scandal that still doesn't make a lot of sense. And now his team has a Journey song as their theme. That makes me feel sad.: In my experience, you need at least eight Natty Lights to make Journey tolerable.  The Following is a One-Star Challenge. If the Rochester Generics win, they will receive '93 Lenny Dykstra. If they lose, they will forfeit Joe Judge and Moises Alou.   : And the Generics barely beat he Bengals to take a series lead.: And this is a weird challenge, since the Generics have Sam Rice, who does all of the same things as Nails, except better.  : And the Bengals roar back to tie the series. Now, Yoshida, I disagree, Dysktra does have a unique skill set.  : Generics retake the lead. For example, Yoshida, how many white-collar crimes did Sam Rice commit?: I don't know, was there white collar crime in the '30s?  : Bengals tie the series again. And yes, Yoshida, there was white collar crime back then. Quite a lot of it, in fact.: Okay, so, if I'm understanding you, Dykstra can help the Generics defraud people of their money?   : Bengals take their first lead of the series with a big win. Yoshida, what Dykstra brings to the table is being a wildcard. Every great team needs a wildcard.: Wouldn't a wildcard make things worse for a team?   : Generics tie it up, and there will be a decisive Game 7. Anyway, think about it Yoshida, without a wildcard, you're predictable, hidebound, but with a wildcard, who knows what's going to happen next?  : Generics win, and they get '93 Lenny Dykstra!: I still don't know that that's a good thing.: It's good enough. But if you're still hung up on fraudsters, you'll want to look away, because the Portland Bulldogs have a challenge coming up now, and they'll take on the...Anchorage Penguins!: The Penguins played in Super-League II and were really, really bad. Hear the Rime of the Ancient Mariner, see his eyes as he stops one of three-: Don't sing along with the intro music. The Following is a One-Star Challenge. If the Bulldogs win, they will receive '65 Frank Howard. IF they lose, they will forfeit John Candelaria and Howard Johnson.   : Bulldogs take Game 1. I don't think this is going to be a long series.: Why is the Bulldogs' logo so big?: Ah...everything's bigger in Maine?  : Penguins take one back, and the series is tied.: But how can sail with no wind in her sails-: No singing!  : Bulldogs win Game 3, and take a 2-1 lead.  : Bulldogs take another, and I don't think the Penguins are going to be able to come back from this one. Hell, I'm pretty sure of it.: And in the light of the moon, he prays for their beauty, not doom!: Yoshida!  : And the Bulldogs win the Capital Punisher!: Wait, that's Frank Howard's nickname? That's...I don't know, that seems kind of harsh.: Not really, baseball players were paid a lot less back then, so a lot of them took side jobs during the offseason. Frank Howard worked as an executioner in Virginia.: Really?: Sure, why not. Anyway, we've got one challenge left, and it's the Second City Saints versus the...Detroit Riots.: The ones you rebuilt into a perfect killing machine?: Very much so! The Following is a Three-Star Challenge. If the Second City Saints win, they will receive '10 Robinson Cano. If they lose, they will forfeit Warren Spahn and Bobby Bonilla.   : Riots take Game 1. Yoshida, when cbx, I took control of the Riots, and I did terrible things when I was in control. I traded for most of the high super-draft picks, and then used them to draft a team of ringers. When I sent them into relegation, I had hoped that I could forget that part of the Super-League, but now they have returned...  : Saints tie it up.: See, Smasher, the Saints can pull this out.: No, Yoshida. All the Saints did with that win was make the Riots angry...  : Riots win Game 3, and take 2-1 lead. Forgive me, I don't not mean for this to happen!  : Riots on the verge of victory. : But if the Saints lose this series...: I know, Yoshida, with the collateral the Saints have put up, a loss here may kill their team in Week 1. What have I done?  : Riots finish the Saints off. Saints lose Warren Spahn and Bobby Bonilla. drat it all.: Well, there's always more challenges, Smasher. : Yeah, great, a million more challenges. That's...really...something. Okay, that will do it for me. I'll see you guys tomorrow!
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Sep 24, 2012 00:34
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Smasher League Injury Report Cologne Emperors Al Simmons (LF) (Tripped on 99 Luftballoons) - 35 days Great Googly-Mooglies Justin Verlander (SP) (Overdosed on Funk..and Shrooms) - 34 days The Super-League VII Challenge Series Contest: Your Smasher Sanity Depreciation Station So, you've gone through the dispersal draft, or you want to fix your mediocre returning team, and you're one piece away from greatness. Oh, you could wait for the Super-Draft around the midpoint of the season, but can you afford to wait? Well, if you're willing to take a risk, then maybe I can help you out... Here's how the challenge works. You put up your Super-Draft picks, or an equivalent consideration, and choose which level of challenge you want to face. You win, you get a player from that tier of prizes, you lose, I take your draft picks or whatever it is you put up. And, of course, there's nothing really stopping you from challenging more than once... To win, all you have to do is win a best-of-seven series against one of the teams listed under your chosen level of the challenge. Which team you'll be challenging will be randomly selected, so you won't know which one you'll be facing. One-Star Challenges (*) Winnable, but not automatic Possible Teams Anchorage Penguins (0-1) Atlantis Unspecifieds Atlantis Aquamen (SLVI) Boston Crabs (SLIV) Boston Crabs (SLVI) Brooklyn Bombers (SLII) Brooklyn Bombers (SLIV) Brooklyn Bronies California Unspecifieds (0-1) Cleveland Communists (1-0) Des Moines Dervishes (SLIV) Dorchester Phantoms East St. Louis Electrics (0-1) Falmouth Clippers (0-1) Free Country Fhqwhgads Greater Googly-Mooglies Hakata Runnin' Ramen Hill Valley Biffs Jackson Jerks of Mississippi Jerk City Philosophers Kodak Googles Kolkata Indians (0-1) Las Vegas Gamblers (0-1) London Calling (1-0) Motor City Bengals (0-1) Newport Sharks (SLI) Newport Sharks (SLII) #OccupySuperLeague Philadelphia Longshots Rockford Losers (SLIII) (1-0) San Francisco Clues Seattle Homers (1-0) Senadores de San Juan (SLII) Stevie Mitch Specials (1-0) Toronto Ravens Vancouver Loonies (0-1) Rewards 1B - '08 Carlos Delgado (SES) 2B - '07 Dustin Pedroia (SES) 3B - '37 Red Rolfe (ATA) RF - '18 Ross Youngs (DES) DH - '09 Mark Reynolds (LAV) SP - '79 Phil Niekro (HAK) SP - '26 Urban Shocker (SLA/DOR) RP - '86 Jesse Orosco (LEP) RP - '99 Jason Isringhausen (EVV) Two-Star Challenges (**) The teams aren't so good, but neither are the players. Possible Teams Baltimore Blind Men (0-2) Cleveland Unicorns (SLI) (0-2) Des Moine Dervishes (SLII) (0-2) EV-IL Corp. Villains (1-0) Greenbrier Orchids Idaho Potatoes (1-1) Mid-Northern Suicidal Tendencies Mudville Masochists (0-1) Paris Postmodernists (1-0) San Diego Freewheelers (0-1) Senadores de San Juan (SLI) (0-1) Silicon Valley Wanzers (1-0) Tigres de San Juan Rewards C - '73 Thurman Munson (VAN/SES) 1B - '05 Ryan Howard (FRA/PRO) 2B - '85 Julio Franco (PRO) 3B - '02 Aramis Ramirez (IDA) IF - '91 Matt Williams (OCC) CF - '79 Dale Murphy (HAK) RF - '97 Sammy Sosa (DER) DH - '02 Ed Delahanty (MID) SP - '21 George Uhle (DES) SP - '90 Kevin Brown (SFC/PRO) RP - '02 Chad Bradford (As seen in Moneyball (PHL) RP - '94 John Wetteland (HAK) Three-Star Challenges (***) Solid fights for solid players. Possible Teams Atlantis Aquamen (SLIII-SLIV) (1-0) Angel Grove Power Rangers (0-1) Boston Crabs (SLI-SLII) (0-1) Chicago Dinger-Machines (0-1) Deadwood Cutthroats (0-1) Detroit Riots (1-1) Detroit Original Riots (1-1) Detroit Switchblades (1-1) Honolulu Lava Flows Juneau Juggernauts (SLI) Leprechauns (1-0) Milwaukee Drinkers (0-1) New New York Fighting Mongooses (1-0) New Orleans Hurricanes (1-0) Omaha Forgettables (SLIII) Omaha Forgettables (SLV) Oyster Cult Blues (0-1) Petaluma Goose Eggs (1-0) Rewards C - '22 Gabby Hartnett (GRE/GAN) 1B - '85 Don Mattingly (NNY/VIR) 3B - '82 Paul Molitor (GRE) LF - '81 Tim Raines (GAN) RF - '70 Reggie Jackson (NNY/DER) DH - '39 Hank Greenberg (DER) SP - '50 Robin Roberts (PHL) SP - '62 Gaylord Perry (SES) SP - '90 Randy Johnson (CLU/DER) RP - '05 Billy Wagner (FRA/SES) RP - '89 John Franco (SES) Four-Star Challenges (****) How much are you willing to risk for a star player? Possible Teams Chicago Blood Sox (2-1) Framingham Fillies (1-1) Newport Sharks (SLV-SLVI) Queens Mercuries (0-2) Providence Murderbots (1-2) Seattle SuperSonics Virginia City Vigilantes (1-2) Rewards C - '99 Mike Piazza (EVV) 1B - '64 Harmon Killebrew (SES) 2B - '69 Joe Morgan (LEP) 3B - '83 George Brett (BLI/CHB) LF - '67 Carl Yastrzemski (PHL) RF - '92 Tony Gwynn (LEP) SP - '03 Rube Waddell (SES) SP - '03 Eddie Plank (NEW/PRO) SP - '12 Christy Mathewson (SES) SP - '59 Bob Gibson (SES) RP - '84 Dan Quisenberry (BLI) RP - '98 Trevor Hoffman (VAN) Five-Star Challenges (*****) You're probably not going to win...but what if you did? Possible Teams Boston Skyhawks (5-0) Gander Doppel-Bangers (2-2) Rewards C - '75 Johnny Bench (MID) 1B - '37 Lou Gehrig (ATA) 2B - '21 Rogers Hornsby (DEM) 3B - '80 Mike Schmidt (BSC) SS - '?? Pop Lloyd (IDA) CF - '37 Joe DiMaggio (ATA) RF - '58 Hank Aaron (DEM) DH - '20 Babe loving Ruth (QUE) SP - '16 Walter Johnson (ATA) SP - '00 Randy Johnson (PRP) SP - '04 Ed Walsh (CHB) SP - '93 Roger Clemens (BSC) RP - '01 Mariano Rivera (CLU/PRO) RP - '77 Bruce Sutter (KOL/LEP) Smasher Dynamo fucked around with this message at 20:47 on Sep 24, 2012 |
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Sep 24, 2012 00:45
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Well, that's a bummer. Put Verlander on the DL, move Lilly to the rotation (  ) and call up 1978 Bill Lee to be the long reliever. Here's a new pitching rotation:SP1. Chief Bender SP2. Cliff Lee SP3. Chief Bender SP4. Mel Harder SP5. Ted Lilly LR Bill Lee MR Justin Masterson SR Joe Smith SR Santiago Casilla SU Kerry Wood CL Kerry Wood The Mooglies also bid 2009 Kerry Wood and 2009 Kerry Wood on a * challenge for 1987 Jimmy Key.
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Sep 24, 2012 01:02
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Slot pizarro in starting fifth.
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Sep 24, 2012 01:05
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A few things:
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Sep 24, 2012 01:10
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  : The Vice City Goose Eggs will try again, and risk a second round draft pick, SP Frank Tanana and 1B Glenn Davis on the ***-star challenge for 2010 Robinson Cano.
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Sep 24, 2012 01:15
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Let's move Viola back to AAA & bring Falkenberg up to be #5. Pedro can sit in AAA for a week while I see how the rotation does without him. Look at that team ERA! 
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Sep 24, 2012 01:17
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 Leave it to my team to make a 1* challenge a goddamn slog. Yank Santo for Garciaparra at 3B; slot in Zachary for Mercker at Short Relief, Zambrano should be Long Relief, and we'll let Finley ride in CF until I see Dykstra's stats. Cano/Kent should be a platoon at 2B and Gwynn/Sosa the same at RF, if they are not already. We'll also put in the same Judge/Alou combo for a 1* 1970 Catfish Hunter challenge because I have a feeling this will be a long season.  St Paul Bearers Too early to panic, let's wait a bit. kw0134 fucked around with this message at 02:06 on Sep 24, 2012 |
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Sep 24, 2012 02:04
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Smasher Dynamo posted:Smasher League Injury Report Really? Again? Can't I just stay injury free for a while.. drat it all. Just give me a season at full power for once to see if I can make the playoffs  Slot in Steve Kemp for him. I'm in my chamber making backroom deals to stop this from going south fast...
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Sep 24, 2012 10:31
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So apparently the entire outfield, which I perceived as my weakest part of the lineup, are all hitting at least .300. Of course, no one else is hitting over .200 right now but it's only three games. I'll move the Capital Punisher up to take the spot of Eddie Joost. He'll stay on the bench until the outfield comes back down to earth, which means he should be starting week 3. I'm probably overstepping my bounds a bit here, but I'm going to bet Kurt Gibson and Eddie Joost on a ****-challenge for Ty Cobb.
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Sep 24, 2012 20:03
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Dynamo League Injury Report We have a new Intercontinental Champion! Burma Imperialists Lance Berkman (1B/OF) (Sleeping Sickness) - 12 days Florida Oranges Justin Morneau (1B) (The Inevitable) - 46 days Poughkeepsie Superbas Reggie Jackson (OF) (Tragic Butter Churning Accident) - 92 days
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Sep 24, 2012 20:54
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Summon me a hall-of-famer! Mathews off the bench to 3B, Pujols to 1B, Morneau to DL & call up Petrocelli to And thank your lucky stars I don't have another second baseman or I'd move Lajoie over there and then I'd actually have competent fielding in the middle of my infield.
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Sep 24, 2012 21:02
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Since Smasher doesn't have time... The Unofficial, Poorly Written Substitute Smasher League Preview! Mark Bellhorn Division Fun fact: Mark Bellhorn was played by Roger Moore in the TV series! Catcher '95 Mike Piazza (Cells) '38 Bill Dickey (Phoenixes) '28 Spud Davis (Juggs) '12 Chief Meyers (Googlies) Piazza was the best hitting catcher in major league history. Dickey was a Hall of Famer in his prime. Davis was a pretty solid contact hitter, but this version is really young. Meyers isn't much more than filler. First Base '30 Jimmie Foxx (Juggs) '38 Lou Gehrig (Phoenixes) '11 Miguel Cabrera (Cells) '01 Jeff Bagwell (Googlies) I'm giving a slight edge to Foxx because of Gehrig's age. Cabrera and Bagwell are also similar talents, with Cabrera getting the nod because Bagwell's a bit older as well. Second Base '11 Eddie Collins (Googlies) '96 Robbie Alomar (Phoenixes) '97 Chuck Knoblauch (Juggs) '10 Jim Delahanty (Cells) Collins is in the debate for greatest second baseman of all time, and this version is in his prime. Alomar is a little overrated by history, but was a solid hitter and doesn't have the dead-ball defense disadvantage. Chuck Knoblauch still isn't worth Whitey Ford, but he's an adequate Super League player in his pre-Yankee days. Jim was not the good Delahanty brother. Third Base '86 Wade Boggs (Cells) '66 Brooks Robinson (Googlies) '33 Mel Ott (Juggs) '38 Red Rolfe (Phoenixes) Boggs at his peak was an on-base machine. Robinson was the best defensive third baseman of all time, and was at his offensive peak (such as it was) in the mid-60's. Ott didn't technically move to third base until later in his career, and was never much of a fielder there, but he's got a heck of a bat if you have the right ballpark for him. Rolfe was decent, but had a short career, and Mogul takes that into account. Shortstop '87 Cal Ripken (Cells) '90 Barrence Larkin (Phoenixes) '68 Dick McAuliffe (Googlies) '89 Robin Yount (Juggs) Ripken was already starting to suffer the effects of his stupid consecutive games streak by '87, but I don't know if Mogul models that kind of stuff, and at his peak, he was an all-time great shortstop. Larkin was just finding his stride in the early 90's, and hadn't really become a superstar yet. McAuliffe was a much better second baseman than shortstop, but he has a little power. Yount hadn't played a game at shortstop in five years by '89, but he could still hit a little. Left Field '39 Ted Williams (Googlies) '89 Rickey Henderson (Phoenixes) '03 Ichiro Suzuki (Cells) '75 Carl Yastrzemski (Juggs) Ted Williams is Ted Williams. Henderson was not at his best during his Yankee years, but he's still the greatest leadoff man of all time in the middle of his prime. Ichiro was also at his peak in the early '00s, though he lacked Henderson's pure leadoff skills, and didn't have the power to make up for it. Yaz wasn't really an outfielder anymore by '75. Center Field '60 Mickey Mantle (Cells) '30 Hack Wilson (Juggs) '34 Earl Averill (Googlies) '78 Chet Lemon (Phoenixes) Mantle is Mantle, and '60 is smack in the middle of his peak. There's not a huge difference between Wilson and Averill, but Wilson's peak was a bit higher. Lemon is a great role player and the best defender of the group, but he's not heading for the Hall of Fame any time soon. Right Field '10 Ty Cobb (Cells) '98 Tim Salmon (Juggs) '09 Shin-Soo Choo/'98 Bernie Williams (Googlies) '06 Brian Giles (Phoenixes) Ty Cobb is Ty Cobb, even when he's 23 years old. Salmon isn't really on the same level. I'm not sold on Choo as a Super League starter, and he'll be taking the bulk of the ABs in the RF platoon. Giles was well past his prime by '06. DH '85 Wade Boggs (Juggs) '06 Mike Piazza (Phoenixes) '09 Travis Hafner/'85 Joe Carter (Googlies) '03 John Olerud (Cells) Peak Boggs is still an on-base machine. Piazza was on his way out of the league by '06, and couldn't really catch anymore, but he still has a bit of pop as a DH. Joe Carter is overrated due to his postseason heroics, and Hafner's past his very short prime by '09. By '03, Olerud was much more respected for his glove than his bat, but that doesn't really help him at DH. SP1 '86 Roger Clemens (Cells) '11 Chief Bender (Googlies) '03 Randy Johnson (Juggs) '64 Jim Bunning (Phoenixes) Young Clemens has a history of success in the Super League, and I see no reason for that to change. Bender is credited with inventing the slider and was a heck of a dead-ball pitcher, though he was just a touch past his best by '11. Randy Johnson was 39 years old by 2003, and it was starting to show. Jim Bunning was a somewhat better version of Jack Morris--a decent enough pitcher, but not really a Super League ace.. SP2 '11 Joe Wood (Juggs) '38 Lefty Gomez (Phoenixes) '11 Justin Verlander (Cells) '09 Cliff Lee (Googlies) No man alive can throw harder than Joe Wood. Gomez was on his way out by '38, but he has a pretty good Super League pedigree. Verlander needs a big year to shake off the Brony stink before anyone will trust him, but he's a hell of a pitcher in real life. Cliff Lee is decent, but not on the same level as those guys. SP3 '21 Carl Mays (Phoenixes) '11 Justin Verlander (Googlies) '66 Steve Carlton (Juggs) '86 Tom Seaver (Cells) I like Mays' borderline deadball skills slightly more than Verlander's modern skills. Carlton is still just a baby in '66, or he'd be up there, too. Seaver was ancient by '86. SP4 '79 Don Sutton (Phoenixes) '11 Chief Bender (Googlies) '01 Tom Glavine (Juggs) '10 Ed Summers (Cells) Sutton's long history of Super League success gets him the nod, followed by the efficient dead-baller, Bender. Glavine is on the wrong side of 35, though he was solid for the Juggs last year. Summers isn't really Super League material. Bullpen '94 Smoltz/'85 Righetti (Juggs) '70 Fingers/'06 Hoffman (Phoenixes) '85 Henke/'03 Benitez (Cells) '11 Casilla/'09 Wood (Googlies) I think I like prime Smoltz/Righetti just a touch more than baby Fingers/ancient Hoffman. Henke is great, but lacks a supporting cast. The Googlies need a bullpen. Prediction: Phoenixes Cells Juggs Googlies The Phoenixes need another bat or two, and a proper ace. But they should have enough to see off the challenge of the Juggs, whose horrible defense will offset their pitching strength just a bit too much. The Cells' fatal flaw is the bottom half of the rotation. The Googlies' starting pitching is pretty strong, but they have holes in their offense and their bullpen is going to be a big problem. The Skyhawks Memorial Division Fun Fact: The Skyhawks Memorial Division is not, as most believe, named after the Boston Skyhawks. Instead, it is named after the Buick Skyhawk, which was discontinued in 1989. R.I.P., Buick Skyhawk! Catcher '49 Yogi Berra (Comancheros) '72 Ted Simmons (W's) '93 Ivan Rodriguez (Ted Sox) '85 Ernie Whitt (Goose Eggs) A group of youngsters, plus Ernie Whitt. Berra was just about to hit his prime in '49, and he's one of the all-time greats. Simmons could flat-out hit, and in '72, he wasn't yet physically broken. Baby I-Rod was a pretty good defender, but hadn't developed enough power to make up for his lack of discipline on offense. Ernie Whitt probably shouldn't be in the Super League. First Base '93 Rafael Palmeiro (Ted Sox) '00 Mark McGwire (Comancheros) '22 George Sisler (Goose Eggs) '99 John Olerud (W's) A bit of a letdown group. Palmeiro was just hitting his peak in '93 as the steroid era began, but his peak was secretly not all that great, despite the PEDs. McGwire was ancient, but still had some power in '00. Sisler was a fantastic contact hitter, but lacked the power you'd want from first base. Olerud was a fine contact hitter in his own right, and the best defender of the group, but he didn't hit for contact nearly as well as Sisler, or for power nearly as well as Palmeiro/McGwire. Second Base '86 Lou Whitaker (W's) '75 Rod Carew (Comancheros) '60 Nellie Fox (Goose Eggs) '93 Julio Franco (Ted Sox) Sweet Lou was just as good as Robbie Alomar and definitely belongs in the Hall, no matter what Smasher says. He was at his peak in the mid-late 80's. Rod Carew was a great hitter, especially for a middle infielder, but he wasn't a great defender. Fox will get on base a bit, hit okay for contact, and play great defense, but you're not going to get any power at all out of him. Franco's defense was so terrible that he'd moved to DH full-time by '93, and really doesn't have the bat to make up for that defense. Third Base '04 Scott Rolen (W's) '48 Bob Elliott (Ted Sox) '95 Jim Thome (Comancheros) '83 Buddy Bell/'85 Rance Mulliniks (Goose Eggs) Thome is probably a little better at his peak than Rolen and Elliott, but it's a baby Thome and the other two are in their primes. Rolen gets the nod over Elliott at #1 because his prime lasted longer, he's a bit younger, and his defense is much better. Buddy Bell is a perfectly acceptable Super Leaguer, and I'm sure Rance Mulliniks tries hard, but they're never going to match the production of the first three. Shortstop '18 Rogers Hornsby (Comancheros) '08 Troy Tulowitzki (Goose Eggs) '09 Asdrubal Cabrera (W's) '17 Ray Chapman (Ted Sox) Hornsby is one of the greatest hitters of all time, even at 22 years old, and even with his atrocious shortstop defense. Tulowitzki's splits suggest that while Colorado has affected his numbers somewhat, he can still hit away from home, and he's still a plus defender. Cabrera gets the nod over Chapman because of Chapman's deadball defense. Left Field '95 Manny Ramirez (Comancheros) '29 Al Simmons (W's) '08 Matt Holliday/'22 Ken Williams (Goose Eggs) '04 Johnny Damon (Ted Sox) Ramirez and Simmons were both extraordinary hitters, but Manny A) was a little better, and B) could play RF in a pinch. Holliday and Williams were both very good hitters for relatively short peaks. Damon's peak lasted longer, but he lacks true corner outfield power. Center Field '51 Willie Mays (Ted Sox) '49 Joe DiMaggio (Comancheros) '61 Duke Snider (W's) '35 Indian Bob Johnson (Goose Eggs) I prefer young Willie Mays over aging Joe DiMaggio, for defense if nothing else. Duke Snider has a definite Super League pedigree, but I'd rather gamble on Mays/DiMaggio than take Duke. Indian Bob isn't really a center fielder. Right Field '26 Babe Ruth (W's) '17 Tris Speaker (Ted Sox) '98 Sammy Sosa (Comancheros) '58 Al Kaline (Goose Eggs) You can't really go wrong with any of these guys. Ruth is Ruth. Speaker gets the nod over Sosa and Kaline because of his defense, speed and on-base abilities. You could make a case for Kaline over Sosa for his contact hitting and defense as well, but Sosa just hit so many home runs during that stretch that it's hard to argue. DH '95 Albert Belle (Comancheros) '93 Juan Gonzalez (Ted Sox) '86 Kirk Gibson (W's) '85 George Bell/'08 Matt Holliday (Goose Eggs) Belle was one of the most dangerous hitters of the 90's. Gonzalez was not too far behind, though his lack of patience hurt. Gibson is adequate Super League filler. George Bell had a couple good years, then faded fast. SP1 '94 Greg Maddux (Comancheros) '58 Jim Bunning (Goose Eggs) '93 Jack McDowell (W's) '48 Warren Spahn (Ted Sox) The 90's Braves have always been a bit disappointing in the Super League. Jim Bunning is still solid but not a Super League ace. McDowell serves a purpose, but that purpose is more "comedy" than "pitching". Spahn will likely run into the same trouble as other soft-throwing lefties. SP2 '61 Sandy Koufax (W's) '75 Bert Blyleven (Comancheros) '62 Juan Marichal (Goose Eggs) '17 Stan Coveleski (Ted Sox) Koufax was an all-time great, and he's just hitting his peak in '61. Blyleven's Super League success is well-documented. Marichal was just a touch young in '62. Coveleski is good, but he's very much dependent on a questionable Ted Sox defense. SP3 '13 Pete Alexander (W's) '22 Urban Shocker (Goose Eggs) '93 Kevin Brown (Ted Sox) '66 Luis Tiant (Comancheros) We all know what Alexander is capable of. Shocker and Brown are both guys who pitch to contact, but Shocker has the better defense behind him. Tiant was still a couple years away from really being good in '66. SP4 '02 Cy Young (W's) '72 Bob Gibson (Comancheros) '46 Early Wynn (Ted Sox) '11 Doug Fister (Goose Eggs) Young and Gibson were both getting old, but I think Young has a touch more left in his tank. Wynn needed a couple years after the war to get his groove back, but I think the odds of him finding his feet quickly are better than the odds of Fister getting a good roll. Bullpen '92 Henke/'81 Reardon (Comancheros) '83 Henke/'11 Valverde (Goose Eggs) '93 Nen/'93 Henke (Ted Sox) '99 Nen/'61 Williams (W's) That's a lot of Nen and Henke. Reardon is a perennial disappointment, but none of these combos are lights-out, and '92 Henke still had some gas left in the tank. I like Baby Henke, but I can't shake the feeling Valverde will be a problem. Baby Nen might not be ready yet, and by '93, Henke was starting to slip. And '61 Stan Williams scares me. Prediction W's Comancheros Goose Eggs Ted Sox It's going to be a long year for the Ted Sox, despite some interesting pieces. I think the Goose Eggs could make some noise with a couple more bats and one more good arm. The Comancheros should be right there in contention, but the W's have a better rotation and Babe Ruth, and that will be the difference. The Senor Goodtimes Division Fun Fact: The third result in a wikipedia search for "Senor Goodtimes" is Angaraag Mahanta! Catcher '53 Yogi Berra (Potatoes) '34 Gabby Hartnett (Landers) '43 Walker Cooper (Mudholes) '40 Rudy York (Bobbles) Berra is one of the best ever, in his prime. Hartnett is a step behind Berra, and a little older. Cooper was a good, solid catcher who should be adequate in the Super League. York was a great hitter, but wasn't really a catcher defensively. First Base '26 Lou Gehrig (Landers) '62 Willie McCovey (Potatoes) '11 Prince Fielder (Mudholes) '91 Mark Grace (Bobbles) Gehrig was just hitting his stride in '26, though the Landers' ballpark will hurt him. McCovey was a touch too young in '62, but should still put up numbers. Fielder can hit, but not field. Grace is the best fielder of the bunch, but lacks the others' power. Second Base '40 Charlie Gehringer (Bobbles) '39 Bobby Doerr (Landers) '49 Red Schoendienst (Mudholes) '53 Billy Martin (Potatoes) The Mechanical Man was 37 in 1940, but he could still hit, and his glove was never his greatest strength. Doerr was still a baby in '39, but he had a fine glove and some pop in his bat. Schoendienst is adequate Super League filler. Martin doesn't belong in the league. Third Base '06 Alex Rodriguez (Bobbles) '98 Scott Rolen (Landers) '53 Gil McDougald (Potatoes) '43 Whitey Kurowski (Mudholes) Rolen has power, patience, and defense, but A-Rod has all of that and then some. McDougald is more valuable for his versatility than strictly as a third baseman. Kurowski did all his best work during the war years, which hurts him. Shortstop '84 Cal Ripken (Landers) '91 Cal Ripken (Potatoes) '06 Derek Jeter (Bobbles) '96 Edgar Renteria (Mudholes) Young Ripken is better than old. Jeter can hit, but his glove puts him a step behind. Renteria is a baby, and even at his peak, wasn't on the same level as Ripken or Jeter. Left Field '11 Ryan Braun (Mudholes) '85 Tim Raines (Landers) '40 Hank Greenberg (Bobbles) '68 Willie Horton (Potatoes) Braun has been in the running for best hitter in the league the last few years. Raines is one of the greatest pure leadoff men in history. Greenberg could hit, but wasn't really an outfielder. Horton had a couple great years and a lot of adequate ones, and that doesn't cut it in the Super League. Center Field '38 Joe DiMaggio (Landers) '53 Mickey Mantle (Potatoes) '03 Andruw Jones (Bobbles) '12 Andrew McCutchen (Mudholes) Young DiMaggio gets a slight edge on young Mantle, for defense if nothing else. Andruw Jones had power and defense, but he's not really in the same category. McCutchen is having a great year, but it's only one year, and Mogul measures full careers. Right Field '43 Stan Musial (Mudholes) '65 Hank Aaron (Landers) '06 Vlad Guerrero (Potatoes) '06 Gary Sheffield (Bobbles) Musial is always an incredible hitter. Aaron is in his prime, and Sheffield and Vlad are not. Vlad still had a bit left in his bat in '06, while Sheffield was essentially done. DH '?? Josh Gibson (Potatoes) '15 Babe Ruth (Bobbles) '04 Manny Ramirez (Landers) '96 Gary Sheffield (Mudholes) It says a lot about a position when Manny Ramirez and Gary Sheffield are the third and fourth best hitters. I'm giving the nod to Gibson over Ruth because Ruth is young and Gibson's in his prime. SP1 '99 Pedro Martinez (Landers) '93 Curt Schilling (Bobbles) '06 Ervin Santana (Potatoes) '43 Howie Pollet (Mudholes) Pedro is in the "greatest ever" conversation. Schilling was solid and reliable for many years. Santana was kind of a one-hit wonder. Pollet feasted on the replacement players during the war years. SP2 '85 Roger Clemens (Landers) '96 Kevin Brown (Mudholes) '06 Justin Verlander (Bobbles) '06 Jered Weaver (Potatoes) Young Clemens has a pretty good history in the Super League. Brown was at his absolute peak in '96, and the Mudholes should have the infield to back him up. Verlander is a baby, but wasn't terrible last year in the Super League. Rookie Jered Weaver might find the Senor Goodtimes a rough place to debut. SP3 '46 Bob Feller (Landers) '94 Tom Glavine (Bobbles) '53 Ed Lopat (Potatoes) '96 Al Leiter (Mudholes) Feller had a slow start, but finished pretty strong last year. Glavine struggled mightily all year. Lopat was in his mid-30s by '53, and was never that great to begin with. Al Leiter is a better color commentator than a pitcher. SP4 '91 Greg Maddux (Bobbles) '95 Roger Clemens (Mudholes) '53 Whitey Ford (Potatoes) '77 Rick Reuschel (Landers) Greg Maddux had a great year last year. '95 Clemens is a mystery: you might get PED Clemens, or you might get Fat Clemens. The chance of PED Clemens offsets the risk, in my opinion. Whitey Ford wasn't quite Whitey Ford yet in '53, but he was still pretty good. Rick Reuschel isn't quite on the same level, but is still solid, especially with a good infield behind him. Bullpen '99 Rivera/'85 Henke (Landers) '79 Gossage/'06 Rivera (Bobbles) '96 Nen/'11 Axford (Mudholes) '06 Rodriguez/'06 Shields (Potatoes) I slightly prefer younger Rivera to 36-year-old Rivera. Peak Nen put up his great numbers during the steroid era, which puts him just ahead of K-Rod's post-roid performance. I don't trust Axford or Shields, though. Prediction Landers Bobbles Mudholes Potatoes There's too much hitting in this division for the Potatoes' iffy pitching to get by. The Mudholes are not far from competitive, but no team that would leave Johnny Hopp off their roster deserves better than third place. The Bobbles are the defending champs, but they actually lost the division title to the Landers last season. So the question becomes: did the Landers add enough over the offseason to win a playoff series?
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Sep 25, 2012 00:25
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Thank you noun for doing that, sincerely  !
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Sep 25, 2012 00:35
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 Super-League VII, Smasher League Week 1: The Fun Never Starts!      Analysis Nothing has really changed from last year's champions.      Analysis An Emperors' season without debilitating injuries just wouldn't be right, would it?      Analysis The Comancheros continue their proud tradition of mediocrity by promptly splitting their first series against the Landers. No progress at all!      Analysis You know, Marauder, I had hoped you could inflict a first-week beating on the Cultists, but evidently you could not. Very, very disappointing.      Analysis Too early to tell much of anything, although I'll never understand why you wanted Chief Bender over Eddie Plank.      Analysis We already discussed the horrors that will befall the Potatoes should the Packers lose tonight. There's nothing more to say at the moment.      Analysis Well, factorialite, I guess it's time how smart you really are.      Analysis I can't help but notice that your offeseason of trading ended up with you putting Bronson Arroyo as your fifth starter. That was not the smartest thing you've ever done in the Super-League.      Analysis Not a great start, and it's already kind of clear that Howie Pollet isn't good enough to be your ace.      Analysis So...you know that your Tom Seaver is roughly 100 years old, right? I have no doubt he'll give you a few good innings, but, eventually, he'll get injured, won't recover from it, and then you'll be down a starter. And your only replacement starter is Oil Can Boyd. So, that's a crisis that's just waiting to happen.      Analysis You have some of the weirdest platoons I've ever seen. Of course, they might work out for you, they're just weird.      Analysis On this day, I see clearly now...that Odell Hale isn't really a shortstop. He already has two errors in three games. Granted, he's not likely the keep that pace up, but it's still a little alarming, wouldn't you agree?      Analysis I'll deal with you guys...later.      Analysis Another slow start for the W's. Can't say I'm surprised at this point      Analysis All of your starters are slow-throwers. Well, except Kevin Brown, but he's not exactly a power pitcher. It's not necessarily a problem, just an observation.      Analysis drat it! You can't die! I don't want to have to finish that CYOA!     Games of the Week Don May posted:
Box Score   Don May posted:
Box Score   Don May posted:
Box Score   Super-League Challenge! : You know, Yoshida, some days I wonder if this is worth it.: Really?: Not really. "Some" days implies there are times I don't wonder. Anyway, welcome to another edition of the Super-League Challenge, where teams do stupid stuff for stupid reasons! Let's start off with- : Smasher.: Nolan. Something I can do for you?: I just wanted to announce that the next Smasher League update is going to have the Cultists challenge against the Skyhawks. And I am going to guarantee that CthulhuDreams and his damned Cultists are going down. They ain't ever going see what's in the Mystery Box. Not on my drat watch.: Okay. Anything else?: No, that's all that needs to be said.: Neat. Moving on, our first challenge of the night is the Great Googly-Mooglies against the...Boston Crabs...the, uh, third incarnation.: The Crabs lost a hundred games. This is probably not going to be particularly competitive. The Following is a One-Star Challenge. If the Mooglies win, they will receive '89 Ozzie Smith. If they lose, they will forfeit two Super-Draft Picks.   : And the Mooglies drop the first game. Not a good start, especially not against the Crabs and when your collateral is so much more valuable than the reward.: Well, Ozzie Smith was on that episode of The Simpsons, that does count for something. Although there are a lot of mystery spots in the Super-League...  : Mooglies tie it up, and you'd hope they can win this series, otherwise The Goog is going to have to do a lot of soul-searching.  : Another win for the Mooglies, and let's hope they can start closing this out.: But it's another late-inning comeback, which makes me think that there's a problem with the Mooglies' offense, if they can't cut through the Crabs' starters.  : Another tight win for the Mooglies, they're going to win this series, but they have no looked impressive to say the least.: Maybe the Crabs were underrated?: Yeah, I don't think so. They did lose 100 games.  : And that's that. Mooglies win '89 Ozzie Smith. Good for them, I suppose, though it's not going to help their offense much. : Yeah, would a team get a prize if they could acquire all nine players from the episode of The Simpsons? So, that would be...Clemens, Scioscia, Mattingly, Sax, Boggs, Smith, Strawberry, Griffey and Canseco.: I don't think Mike Scioscia has been in the Super-League since Super-League II, and I kind of doubt that's going to change. He wasn't much of a hitter. Anyway, the next challenge is the Rated R Superstars against...The Miz...I mean, the Greater Googly-Mooglies.: Interestingly, The Goog owns 20% of the Superstars and was the owner of the Greater Googly-Mooglies. It's kind of a win-win for him here. Either his new team wins, or his old team looks better. The Following is a One-Star Challenge. If the Superstars win, they will receive '85 Howard Johnson. If they lose, they will forfeit two Super-Draft Picks.   : Superstars blank the Greater Moogs to win the opener. Not a big surprise their, the old Greater Mooglies were pretty awful.: The important thing is that they tried.: No, it isn't. It really, really isn't. In fact, trying and failing is, as a rule, much, much worse that not trying. I encourage children everywhere to not try new things, since it will only lead to new failures.  : Stars win again, and this isn't going to take long at all.  : That's three. One more and we're done with the challenge.: Smasher, why the rush, somewhere you need to be?: ...no...  : Greater Moogs pull one out, but since they're not going to win four straight, it just delays the inevitable.: Smasher, you're in such a bad mood today, I think the Greater Moogs could totally-  : WRONG! Superstars win '85 HoJo. Although I guess I am in a bad mood. I mean, I don't feel good about this Packers game, and I'm unemployed forever...I don't know.: Well, hey, I can take over for the rest of this update, why don't you take the rest of the night off?: Huh...that's not a terrible idea. Okay, Yoshida, I leave it in your hands.: Yay! Okay, the next challenge is the Madison Mudholes against the Greenbrier Orchids! The only Super-League team to ever willingly play in West Virginia! The Following is a Two-Star Challenge. If the Mudholes win, they will receive '82 Robin Yount. If they lose, they will forfeit Neil Walker, Rickie Weeks and a 2nd-Round Pick.   : Mudholes come back strong to win Game 1. I'm not sure what Megaman has to do with the Mudholes to be honest..  : Another win for the Mudholes. I mean, is Megaman based in Madison? I don't think he is, but they never said where he was from in the games.  : Orchids take one back to make it a 2-1 Mudholes lead. I guess I could see Dr. Light working in Madison, they do have that big university and all. I wish I were Megaman.  : Mudholes one game away now...and I still wish I were Megaman. Megaman would be able to throw a fastball faster than 60 miles per hour.  : Mudholes win '82 Robin Yount. Megaman would also be a better shortstop...and he'd make this LP more popular. When Smasher comes back, I think I'm going to suggest we do more stuff with Megaman. It worked out great for that Harvest Moon thread! Anyway, one last challenge for the day, and that's the Luna Landers against The first Omaha Forgettables! It's been a while since I heard that song. It's still pretty great! The Following is a Three-Star Challenge. If the Landers win, the will receive '99 Nomar Garciaparra. If they lose, they will lose two Super-Draft Picks.   : Anyway, this song is from that movie City of Angels from...1998, I think?  : So, Nicholas Cage plays this angel, who flies around Los Angeles helping people...I think, I can't remember, I haven't seen the movie in a while.  : And then he finds this doctor, and falls in love with here, and that's forbidden, because of the fear of the Nephilim once more rising upon this earth. Well, they don't say that in the movie, but it's definitely in the subtext.  : So he becomes human or something, because angels can apparently do that. Remember, this was back in the time when Nicholas Cage in the lead role of a romantic drama seemed like a good idea. I think Meg Ryan played the female lead. I mean, 1998 was a very different time.  : Anyway, so Nicolas Cage is mortal now, so he and Meg Ryan start a relationship. And then she gets hit by a truck. And dies. And then the head angel goes to Nicholas Cage and asks him if it was worth giving up his immortality even though his relationship lasted roughly five scenes, and Nicholas Cage says it was. Although that part never made sense to me. I mean, you've got angels in the movie, so you figure that there's some sort of heaven, and you figure that Meg Ryan is probably going to heaven, so this seems like more a setback than a relationship-killer. Unless Nicholas Cage is damned because he gave up being an angel...that would suuuuuuuck.  : Anyway, that's the end of the movie. Oh, and Landers win '99 Nomar! See you guys tomorrow!
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Sep 25, 2012 00:42
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The Super-League VII Challenge Series Contest: Your Smasher Sanity Depreciation Station So, you've gone through the dispersal draft, or you want to fix your mediocre returning team, and you're one piece away from greatness. Oh, you could wait for the Super-Draft around the midpoint of the season, but can you afford to wait? Well, if you're willing to take a risk, then maybe I can help you out... Here's how the challenge works. You put up your Super-Draft picks, or an equivalent consideration, and choose which level of challenge you want to face. You win, you get a player from that tier of prizes, you lose, I take your draft picks or whatever it is you put up. And, of course, there's nothing really stopping you from challenging more than once... To win, all you have to do is win a best-of-seven series against one of the teams listed under your chosen level of the challenge. Which team you'll be challenging will be randomly selected, so you won't know which one you'll be facing. One-Star Challenges (*) Winnable, but not automatic Possible Teams Anchorage Penguins (0-1) Atlantis Unspecifieds Atlantis Aquamen (SLVI) Boston Crabs (SLIV) Boston Crabs (SLVI) (0-1) Brooklyn Bombers (SLII) Brooklyn Bombers (SLIV) Brooklyn Bronies California Unspecifieds (0-1) Cleveland Communists (1-0) Des Moines Dervishes (SLIV) Dorchester Phantoms East St. Louis Electrics (0-1) Falmouth Clippers (0-1) Free Country Fhqwhgads Greater Googly-Mooglies (0-1) Hakata Runnin' Ramen Hill Valley Biffs Jackson Jerks of Mississippi Jerk City Philosophers Kodak Googles Kolkata Indians (0-1) Las Vegas Gamblers (0-1) London Calling (1-0) Motor City Bengals (0-1) Newport Sharks (SLI) Newport Sharks (SLII) #OccupySuperLeague Philadelphia Longshots Rockford Losers (SLIII) (1-0) San Francisco Clues Seattle Homers (1-0) Senadores de San Juan (SLII) Stevie Mitch Specials (1-0) Toronto Ravens Vancouver Loonies (0-1) Rewards 1B - '08 Carlos Delgado (SES) 2B - '07 Dustin Pedroia (SES) 3B - '37 Red Rolfe (ATA) RF - '18 Ross Youngs (DES) DH - '09 Mark Reynolds (LAV) SP - '79 Phil Niekro (HAK) SP - '26 Urban Shocker (SLA/DOR) RP - '86 Jesse Orosco (LEP) RP - '99 Jason Isringhausen (EVV) Two-Star Challenges (**) The teams aren't so good, but neither are the players. Possible Teams Baltimore Blind Men (0-2) Cleveland Unicorns (SLI) (0-2) Des Moine Dervishes (SLII) (0-2) EV-IL Corp. Villains (1-0) Greenbrier Orchids (0-1) Idaho Potatoes (1-1) Mid-Northern Suicidal Tendencies Mudville Masochists (0-1) Paris Postmodernists (1-0) San Diego Freewheelers (0-1) Senadores de San Juan (SLI) (0-1) Silicon Valley Wanzers (1-0) Tigres de San Juan Rewards C - '73 Thurman Munson (VAN/SES) 1B - '05 Ryan Howard (FRA/PRO) 2B - '85 Julio Franco (PRO) 3B - '02 Aramis Ramirez (IDA) IF - '91 Matt Williams (OCC) CF - '79 Dale Murphy (HAK) RF - '97 Sammy Sosa (DER) DH - '02 Ed Delahanty (MID) SP - '21 George Uhle (DES) SP - '90 Kevin Brown (SFC/PRO) RP - '02 Chad Bradford (As seen in Moneyball (PHL) RP - '94 John Wetteland (HAK) Three-Star Challenges (***) Solid fights for solid players. Possible Teams Atlantis Aquamen (SLIII-SLIV) (1-0) Angel Grove Power Rangers (0-1) Boston Crabs (SLI-SLII) (0-1) Chicago Dinger-Machines (0-1) Deadwood Cutthroats (0-1) Detroit Riots (1-1) Detroit Original Riots (1-1) Detroit Switchblades (1-1) Honolulu Lava Flows Juneau Juggernauts (SLI) Leprechauns (1-0) Milwaukee Drinkers (0-1) New New York Fighting Mongooses (1-0) New Orleans Hurricanes (1-0) Omaha Forgettables (SLIII) (0-1) Omaha Forgettables (SLV) Oyster Cult Blues (0-1) Petaluma Goose Eggs (1-0) Rewards C - '22 Gabby Hartnett (GRE/GAN) 1B - '85 Don Mattingly (NNY/VIR) 3B - '82 Paul Molitor (GRE) LF - '81 Tim Raines (GAN) RF - '70 Reggie Jackson (NNY/DER) DH - '39 Hank Greenberg (DER) SP - '50 Robin Roberts (PHL) SP - '62 Gaylord Perry (SES) SP - '90 Randy Johnson (CLU/DER) RP - '05 Billy Wagner (FRA/SES) RP - '89 John Franco (SES) Four-Star Challenges (****) How much are you willing to risk for a star player? Possible Teams Chicago Blood Sox (2-1) Framingham Fillies (1-1) Newport Sharks (SLV-SLVI) Queens Mercuries (0-2) Providence Murderbots (1-2) Seattle SuperSonics Virginia City Vigilantes (1-2) Rewards C - '99 Mike Piazza (EVV) 1B - '64 Harmon Killebrew (SES) 2B - '69 Joe Morgan (LEP) 3B - '83 George Brett (BLI/CHB) LF - '67 Carl Yastrzemski (PHL) RF - '92 Tony Gwynn (LEP) SP - '03 Rube Waddell (SES) SP - '03 Eddie Plank (NEW/PRO) SP - '12 Christy Mathewson (SES) SP - '59 Bob Gibson (SES) RP - '84 Dan Quisenberry (BLI) RP - '98 Trevor Hoffman (VAN) Five-Star Challenges (*****) You're probably not going to win...but what if you did? Possible Teams Boston Skyhawks (5-0) Gander Doppel-Bangers (2-2) Rewards C - '75 Johnny Bench (MID) 1B - '37 Lou Gehrig (ATA) 2B - '21 Rogers Hornsby (DEM) 3B - '80 Mike Schmidt (BSC) SS - '?? Pop Lloyd (IDA) CF - '37 Joe DiMaggio (ATA) RF - '58 Hank Aaron (DEM) DH - '20 Babe loving Ruth (QUE) SP - '16 Walter Johnson (ATA) SP - '00 Randy Johnson (PRP) SP - '04 Ed Walsh (CHB) SP - '93 Roger Clemens (BSC) RP - '01 Mariano Rivera (CLU/PRO) RP - '77 Bruce Sutter (KOL/LEP)
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Sep 25, 2012 00:53
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For the Great Googly-Mooglies: - 1989 Ozzie Smith replaces 1911 Stuffy McInnis on the roster - New batting order: 1. Eddie Collins 2B 2. Earl Averill CF 3. Jeff Bagwell 1B 4. Ted Williams LF 5. Travis Hafner DH 6. Shin-Soo Choo RF 7. Alex Avila C 8. Brooks Robinson 3B 9. Ozzie Smith SS vs LHP 1. Eddie Collins 2B 2. Earl Averill RF 3. Jeff Bagwell 1B 4. Ted Williams DH 5. Joe Carter LF 6. Chief Meyers C 7. Bernie Williams CF 8. Brooks Robinson 3B 9. Ozzie Smith SS Please remove all personal catcher assignments. For the Rated R Superstars: 1985 Howard Johnson replaces 1934 Odell Hale on the roster and in the lineup, batting ninth against both hands. The Goog fucked around with this message at 16:20 on Sep 25, 2012 |
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Sep 25, 2012 16:13
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Somehow we lost 80% of readers with the move to the new thread. gently caress. Smasher League Injury Report We have a new Televsion Champion and I am very, very, very, very, very unhappy about it. Cologne Emperors Kiki Calero (RP) (Einigkreit und recht und broken finger!) - 13 days Idaho Potatoes Jered Weaver (SP) (I didn't rig this. If I were rigging injuries, Josh Gibson's knees would have exploded into tiny, little bits. Some day, Gibson...some day your pretty little knees are going to pay for Golden Tate's sins. Some day soon.) - 108 days Juneau Juggernauts Joe Wood (SP) (Frostbite!) - 8 days Madison Mudholes Kevin Brown (SP) (Madison, right? Probably got sideswiped by a frat bro from Wisconsin or something) - 11 days
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Sep 25, 2012 20:16
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Smasher Dynamo posted:Somehow we lost 80% of readers with the move to the new thread. gently caress. Are you going to do those title history things? They were pretty cool.
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Sep 25, 2012 20:28
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| # ? May 10, 2024 02:11 |
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Three games isn't enough yet to enter panic mode and start trading all your good players away for bad ones. Give it another update and i'm sure we'll see a flurry of posts all attempting to stop the horrors in some way.
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Sep 25, 2012 20:38
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