BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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BearDrivingTruck: Oct 15, 2011; You see the most shocking sights sometimes

But what about the fact that having no DH is the most American thing about baseball-- if a pitcher wants to win a game, he should pick up a bat and get on base or knock in a run through his own merits.

Shaky analogies or whatever besides, pitcher hits and dingers are some of the most beautiful things. Seeing Barry Zito knock in a run on Friday was amazing.

# ? Oct 22, 2012 23:38

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# ? May 13, 2024 07:50

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

: Smasher, I've got a proposal for you.

: No.

: Hear me out, Smasher, it's a pretty good loving idea.

: Aren't you supposed to have the series finale of Dunn Force ready?

: I'm still working on it. Besides, this will change everything. It's a pitch for season two of Dunn Force. So, Adam Dunn is fighting evil when, one day, he receives word that his estranged grandfather has died and left him the family farm, and Adam Dunn, no farmer himself, has to travel down to Dunn acres and bring the farm back to profitability.

: Farming?

: People love Harvest Moon!

Super-League VII, Smasher League Week 14: Harvest Moon Delenda Est

Games of the Week

Don May posted:

PHOENIXES ROUT SUPERSTARS 10-0

Ithaca- The Superstars are circling the drain and the Phoenixes, as usual, are surviving. Some things never change.

The Phoenixes didn't know the Superstars out with a single blow. Instead, they bled them dry with a thousand cuts, scoring in eight of the nine innings but never more than two runs in any one inning. Even new Superstars' acquisition Joaquin Benoit got hammered for three runs in two and two-thirds innings.

Not that either owner was present to see the contest. The Superstars' owners were busy ministering to their own personal teams, and so had no comment on the loss. The E.D.G.E. AI system, installed by the Superstars' shareholders to manage the team in their absence, did create an automated response, though, "Mission failure. Parameter: Runs scored less than Runs against. Warning: Losses Exceed Wins! Switch to auxiliary plans! Activate Project: I-C-CLEARLY! DESTROY! DESTROY! DESTROY!" The visitors' locker room then self-destructed, injuring several Superstars' players.

Marauder addressed the media via satellite from Fukuoka, "Ah, yes, the lesser jewel in my crown. Still, the Phoenixes might yet prove themselves worthy of my love, should they continue to defeat my enemies. Today was a good step towards that. The Superstars are no longer a threat, I grant you. No, their sideshow nears the end of its lifespan. But it is rather heartening to see such a decisive triumph over something CthulhuDreams has created. The day will come, not too long now, that his Cultists and my Phoenixes must meet, and we will see if his best can match up with my second effort."

Marauder, taking a sip from his ever-present goblet of brandy, then sneered before continuing, "And that brings me to another recurring pest. Bruzer...I heard that you are returning the Super-League. I don't share mrnoun's more...personal animosity towards you, in fact, I want to help you. Look at today's box score, my young friend, see how Roy Halladay fails once more. I believe you're wagering quite heavily on Halladay, aren't you? That is a shame. The Phoenixes will be returning next year, that is almost certain. The Bronies or Bombers or whatever you call your latest creation will once more be placed in the Mark Bellhorn Division. And my question is this: What makes you think that I will allow your new team anything except 100 more losses and another early exit from the Gauntlet? My Finger-Bangers were spawned in the Mark Bellhorn Division. My Doppels ruled it for a time. My Phoenixes still reside there. And you would once more profane it with your presence? Sometimes I feel as though death is too good for your teams, Bruzer. Why not beg the Commissar to place you somewhere else, the Senor Goodtimes perhaps, beg him to keep your team away from mine. Because I vow this, if your team is foolish enough to venture into my Mark Bellhorn Division, they will only find despair."

Box Score

Don May posted:

CULTISTS ROLL MOOGLIES 4-1

Boston- Is there no honor amongst thieves?

Both The Goog and CthulhuDreams invested in the Superstars, and while that joint venture has not exactly worked out as they had planned, one would have thought that this cooperation might extend a bit farther. Looking at the results of this game, it appears not.

The Mooglies came into this game desperate for a win. Three months of bad trades have left the Mooglies adrift, though not completely hopeless. Still, if the Mooglies were going to climb out of the hole they had dug themselves, they would need to start making up some ground.

On the other side of the coin, the Cultists are cruising, with an 11-game lead in their division with 11 weeks to go. Barring a major collapse that, looking at quality of the other teams in their division, seems unlikely, the Cultists will win their division in a walk. They can afford to drop a few games to a friend.

But The Goog is evidently not Cthulhu's friend, as shown in the easy 4-1 win by the Cultists in Boston today. The Cultists did not rest a starter, and gave Pedro Martinez the start. They were playing to win, and, by virtue of having the better team, they did.

In an attempt to put up a unified front, though, The Goog and CthulhuDreams agreed to a joint press conference after the game. The Goog, with the season slipping away from him, appealed to CthulhuDreams to ease up, "We are all connected, Cthulhu, you, me, the birds in the sky and the fishes of the sea. When you hurt me, you hurt yourself. That's the secret of the superconscio-"

CthulhuDreams then interrupted him, "Stop it. I don't care about bringing love or funk or whatever you call it to mankind. I don't care about the Prince of Googopolis, and I certainly don't care about any sort of superconsciousness. I mistakenly believer that you were a good man to do business with, but clearly, I was wrong. You're washed up, The Goog. No, that's not fair. Washed up implies a certain level of excellence that you never possessed. Back in Super-League I, your Mooglies could survive your ineptitude, but today? When I have showed the Super-League exactly the right way to build a team? When I have proven that there is no substitute for number-crunching and simulation? You're just a relic. It's time for you to go away, The Goog, to leave the Super-League to owners who actually know what they're doing. Retire now and save yourself the embarrassment of an early relegation. Hell, the Mooglies are pretty historic, why not ask Smasher for a special Macho Men challenge to give them a proper sendoff. But don't expect any favors from me."

Box Score

Don May posted:

MATHEMATICIANS AND TED SOX BATTLE FOR THE PRIZE

Milton Keynes- What is The Prize?

Mathematicians' owner Revenant Threshold explained, "Ah, The Prize! The Prize is a second chance! A second chance to make things right! To do right by our teams! A team such as mine is not likely to beat the Cultists this season, I know, but I may yet survive. They say that, in his mercy, the Commissar gives out new life to four teams who are not quite strong enough to reach the postseason, but have proven their mettle nonetheless, and pull them out of the Gauntlet and grant them a place in Super-League VIII. I have failed my team, I admit, I have led them astray. We can't win our division but, with a bit of work, next season could be different! All I need to do is win The Prize, then I can show you all that this was not a waste, that the Mathematicians were not damned from the moment of their conception. A second chance is all I need, I tell ye! Just one more chance!"

As for the Ted Sox, who have are now seven games out of the Skyhawks Memorial race, the desire for The Prize was just as strong, "We have made some mistakes over this season, I admit that. But when you ask yourself whether the Ted Sox are better off than where they were just one season again, I think my record speaks for itself. Are things where I want them to be? Of course not. And that's why, with a second chance, I can continue to move forward to put them where they need to be. Now, my opponent wants to return the Ted Sox to the failed policies of the past. A quick relegation followed by a quick obituary followed by another failed team in Super-League in Super-League IX. Is that what's really best for the Super-League? My name is mooseontheloose and I approve this message."

Box Score

NUMBERS!!!!!!!

Analysis

The Bobbleheads win series against the Landers and the Phoenixes as the good times keep rolling.

Analysis

One week until Dihigo comes back. Let's hope that's the answer for your team.

Analysis

A better week. The Comancheros are in a deep hole, but I've seen worse. Keep at it.

Analysis

The Phoenixes should win at least four games next week or they will be in trouble. The Juggernauts aren't beaten yet.

Analysis

In any other division, the Mooglies would be toast. But in the Mark Bellhorn, the Mooglies still have an outside chance. Just don't make any more bad trades.

Analysis

I think the smart play is probably rotating Berra and Gibson at catcher.

Analysis

Someday the Juggernauts will pay for all of their sins.

Also, respond to CVE's trade proposal already.

Analysis

Another lost series against the Bobbleheads. At least you have two more series against them this month.

Analysis

Ouch.

Analysis

The Cells are less than the sum of their parts. Still, seven games back with eleven weeks to go isn't an insurmountable deficit to overcome.

Analysis

Your team deserves another shot in the Super-League. So take it.

Oh, and recall Buster Posey to your active roster. Sweeney's defense isn't doing you any good and his hitting has been just as bad as Posey's.

Analysis

Time is running out for the Superstars, though I'd imagine none of you are all that invested at this point.

Analysis

The Cultists, due to quirks of the schedules, have avoided most of the power teams in the league so far, so next week's matchup with the Eazy W's should be telling.

Analysis

Snider could use a week off when you get a chance.

Analysis

Good defense, infuriating offense. That's the story of the Ted Sox.

Analysis

Rance has...well, just look at the results. Good night, Vice City, good night.

Standings and Leaders

# ? Oct 22, 2012 23:40

The Goog: Aug 6, 2007; It's a Goog Day, yes it is!

Not looking good, dudes. Team's struggling, players are hurt...bad times. Bad times. Would the original Mooglies have fared better? Would having another Cliff Lee instead of another Chief Bender made a world of difference? I guess we'll never know. Still, we can only press forward, and do what we can to win as many games as we can. I think that starts with losing a few and getting the bots some rest.

Smasher! Please:

1. Send down Grady Sizemore; replace him with Earl Averill
2. Bench Jeff Bagwell for the week; replace him with Travis Hafner
3. Bench Cal Ripken for the week; replace him with Mark DeRosa

# ? Oct 22, 2012 23:55

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

Welp. Let's put Putz back into the lineup in place of Benitez, give Clemens a break (why the gently caress is he 4-12?) by swapping him and Seaver in the lineup... and let's swap Soriano and Hasegawa.

Roger Clemens is on the trading block.

I'm looking for a comparative pitcher of stature, preferably a Nolan Ryan/Mordecai Brown/Walter Johnson type. Clemens is great, but for some reason he's just not performing well for my team.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:28

Revenant Threshold: Jan 1, 2008

^I'll idly offer you Wilbur Cooper, though i'm not sure he's quite what you're looking for. However, he's up and avaliable for anyone else, as I need a 3B who knows how to defend.

It's going to be a close one, it looks like. Of course now having said that my luck with injuries is going to come to an end, Romo will start averaging out and Lincecum, having flirted with the idea of a below 5.00 ERA, will walk arm first into a door.

Sweeney out for Posey, hoping permanently and Posey will recover some form. I am optimistic! Klein out for Beltran, Morgan out for Gordon to give them a chance to rest up.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:31

StupidSexyMothman: Aug 9, 2010

cbx posted:

Welp. Let's put Putz back into the lineup in place of Benitez, give Clemens a break (why the gently caress is he 4-12?) by swapping him and Seaver in the lineup... and let's swap Soriano and Hasegawa.

Roger Clemens is on the trading block.

I'm looking for a comparative pitcher of stature, preferably a Nolan Ryan/Mordecai Brown/Walter Johnson type. Clemens is great, but for some reason he's just not performing well for my team.

Have I got a Mordecai Brown for you!

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:37

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

oldskool posted:

Have I got a Mordecai Brown for you!

Clemens for Brown, straight up. I'll do it.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:43

mrnoun: Jul 24, 2007

cbx posted:

Clemens for Brown, straight up. I'll do it.

'86 Clemens, right? I'll offer '95 Greg Maddux if that's the case.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:44

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

mrnoun posted:

'86 Clemens, right? I'll offer '95 Greg Maddux if that's the case.

Yes, it's 1986 Clemens. I wanna see oldskool's response first since he offered Brown first. No offense.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:50

ToiletofSadness: Mar 27, 2010

I'd throw a Nolan Ryan your way, cbx, for 80s Clemens.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:51

mrnoun: Jul 24, 2007

cbx posted:

Yes, it's 1986 Clemens. I wanna see oldskool's response first since he offered Brown first. No offense.

No problem, cbx. Just giving you options. Probably better if you take someone else's offer anyways, since I already have a Clemens and having two copies of a guy makes it a little harder for smasher to build rosters every offseason.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 00:53

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

ToiletofSadness posted:

I'd throw a Nolan Ryan your way, cbx, for 80s Clemens.

What year is your Ryan? Also, still gonna let oldskool respond first before I go any further.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 01:17

ToiletofSadness: Mar 27, 2010

cbx posted:

What year is your Ryan? Also, still gonna let oldskool respond first before I go any further.

71 vintage. He's on the young side, but he's always been good for ~3.50 ERA in front of my bad defense with 9+ K/9.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 01:29

tatankatonk: Nov 4, 2011; Pitching is the art of instilling fear.

Trade Notice! :siren:

Elephants receive:

1994 Pedro Martinez

Vice City Goose Eggs receive:

1967 Phil Niekro
1974 Ron Cey

# ? Oct 23, 2012 01:30

Armitage: Aug 16, 2005; "Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."

Well.

The kids ain't coming back to this mess. John Lackey is off in outer space somewhere getting high on life and space dust, Big Daddy V is stuck, and Stevie B made enough money to cover his debts and is now free to make fun 80s dance music again. I'm alone again. Naturally. Facing relegation for the third time simply sucks.

The trade with the Elephants is confirmed.

Ron Cey takes Rance Mulliniks' place in the lineup. Mulliniks to the bench and Buddy Bell to the DL. Phil Niekro in Pedro Martinez' spot in the rotation. Pedro did well enough but deserves a better chance. I don't think I'm done trading yet!

Armitage fucked around with this message at 01:40 on Oct 23, 2012

# ? Oct 23, 2012 01:33

tatankatonk: Nov 4, 2011; Pitching is the art of instilling fear.

28-Man:

C '67 Joe Torre
1B '74 Steve Garvey
2B '74 Davey Lopes
SS '84 Julio Franco
3B '28 Rogers Hornsby
LF '67 Hank Aaron
CF '84 Brett Butler
RF '03 Ichiro Suzuki

'74 Joe Ferguson - C
'67 Denis Menke - UT
'67 Felipe Alou - 1B/OF
'74 Jim Wynn - OF

SP#1: '84 Bert Blyleven
SP#2: '74 Don Sutton
SP#3: '94 Pedro Martinez
SP#4: '74 Andy Messersmith
SP#5: '78 Luis Tiant

CL '77 Dennis Eckersley
SU '74 Mike Marshall
SR '77 Larry Andersen
SR '77 Jim Kern
MR '67 Ron Reed
MR '67 Clay Carroll
LR '74 Charlie Hough
LR '77 Rick Sutcliffe

AAA:
'77 Dave LaRoche - RP
'84 Joe Carter - OF
'74 Al Downing - SP

code:

#1 Ichiro Suzuki - RF
#2 Rogers Hornsby - 2B
#3 Joe Torre - C
#4 Hank Aaron - LF
#5 Julio Franco - SS
#6 Brett Butler - CF
#7 Steve Garvey - 1B
#8 Davey Lopes - 2B
#9 Pitcher

adjusted for No-DH, moved Hornsby to 3rd, added Pedro to the rotation, adjusted the outfield, added Al Downing from the feeders to round out the 28-man roster.

tatankatonk fucked around with this message at 01:45 on Oct 23, 2012

# ? Oct 23, 2012 01:41

factorialite: Mar 3, 2008; by Lowtax

what was cve's proposal? must have missed it.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 01:53

StupidSexyMothman: Aug 9, 2010

cbx posted:

Clemens for Brown, straight up. I'll do it.

I can accept this.

Clemens to AAA because I want to give my newly drafted pitchers a chance to disappoint me.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 02:20

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

e: Damnit, quote is not edit.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 03:12

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

cbx posted:

Trade Accepted, then.

Brown to Clemens' spot in the rotation.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 03:12

UltimoDragonQuest: Oct 5, 2011

Roster changes.

Full roster below if that's easier than individual moves.

Drop:
3B: '02 Werber, Billy
LF: '02 Sheckard, Jimmy
RP: '92 Sampen, Bill
2B: '02 williams, Jimmy

Add:
3B: '56 Robinson, Jackie
OF: '35 Cooke, Dusty
C: '35 Ferrell, Rick
OF: '35 Johnson, Roy

28-Man Roster:

C: '56 Campanella, Roy
1B: '56 Hodges, Gil
2B: '24 Stephenson, Riggs
3B: '02 McGraw, John
SS: '35 Cronin, Joe
1B: '02 Kelley, Joe
CF: '24 Speaker, Tris
OF: '56 Snider, Duke

SS: '24 Sewell, Joe
LF: '02 Selbach, Kip
1B: '02 Brower, Frank
3B: '56 Robinson, Jackie
OF: '35 Cooke, Dusty
C: '02 Bresnahan, Roger

SP: '02 McGinnity, Joe
SP: '02 Howell, Harry
SP: '56 Koufax, Sandy
SP: '35 Grove, Lefty
SP: '24 Coveleski, Stan
SP: '02 Hughes, Tom

RP '24 Uhle, George
RP '92 Montgomery, Jeff
RP '92 Gordon, Tom
RP '92 Magnante, Mike
RP '92 Davis, Mark

AAA:
SP: '56 Drysdale, Don
OF: '35 Johnson, Roy
C: '35 Ferrell, Rick

Lineups

vs. Righties No DH

3B: McGraw, John
LF: Stephenson, Riggs
CF: Speaker, Tris
RF: Snider, Duke
C: Campanella, Roy
SS: Cronin, Joe
1B: Brower, Frank
2B Sewell, Joe
Pitcher

vs. Lefties No DH

3B: McGraw, John
LF: Stephenson, Riggs
CF: Speaker, Tris
RF: Snider, Duke
C: Campanella, Roy
1B: Hodges, Gil
SS: Cronin, Joe
2B: Robinson, Jackie
Pitcher

Pitching Rotation:

#1 McGinnity, Joe
#2 Hughes, Tom
#3 Grove, Lefty
#4 Coveleski, Stan
#5 Koufax, Sandy

CL Montgomery. Jeff
SU Gordon, Tom
SR Davis, Mark
SR Magnante, Mike
MR Uhle, George
LR Howell, Harry

Are there even interleague games?

vs. Righties DH

3B: McGraw, John
LF: Stephenson, Riggs
CF: Speaker, Tris
DH: Snider, Duke
C: Campanella, Roy
SS: Cronin, Joe
1B: Brower, Frank
2B: Sewell, Joe
RF: Cooke, Dusty

vs. Lefties DH

DH: McGraw, John
LF: Stephenson, Riggs
CF: Speaker, Tris
RF: Snider, Duke
C: Campanella, Roy
1B: Hodges, Gil
SS: Cronin, Joe
3B: Robinson, Jackie
2B:Sewell, Joe

# ? Oct 23, 2012 03:21

Cthulhu Dreams: Dec 11, 2010; If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

Replace Riggs with Rice at all times

Poor Riggs, you'll be back next season.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 06:33

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Expansion Cup Preview

As always, the key to what makes a team good in the Super-League is context. Virtually any team would win 110 games against normal teams. What matters is how much better or worse you are than your competition. In that spirit, I have ranked your teams against each other, position by position.

Non-Existents Division (No-DH)

Catcher
1. '67 Joe Torre (SJE)
2. '32 Ernie Lombardi/'68 Bill Freehan (WEB)
3. '79 Darrell Porter (ONE)
4. '57 Sherm Lollar (ALB)
5. '29 Spud Davis (WAU)

None really jump out at me, but Torre usually puts on a good offensive performance. Platooning Lombardi and Freehan stands at least a decent chance of working, so it's second. Porter usually does okay in the Super-League. Not great, but okay. Lollar is just filler in the Super-League. Picking a guy named 'Spud' to do anything for you ever is just a bad idea.

First Baseman
1. '34 Bill Terry (ALB)
2. '10 Nap Lajoie (WAU)/'11 Ryan Howard (WAU)
3. '74 Steve Garvey (SJE)
4. '96 Andres Galarraga (ONE)
5. '90 Kent Hrbek/'04 Craig Wilson (WEB)

A division full of mediocrity. I guess I'll take Terry because his lack of power isn't as glaring in this division, and he does have great contact skill. The Lajoie/Howard platoon is notable for being hilariously bad on defense and picking two players with exact opposite skills on offense. Steve Garvey, just like in real life, is solid, but not a ton more. The Big Cat doesn't get to play in Coors, and that's going to hold him down. Starting Craig Wilson in the Super-League is essentially just asking to lose 120 games.

Second Baseman
1. '11 Chase Utley (WAU)
2. '80 Joe Morgan (ONE)
3. '57 Nellie Fox (ALB)
4. '74 Davey Lopes (SJE)
5. '32 George Grantham/'04 Freddie Sanchez (WEB)

Utley is a bit less over-the-hill than Morgan, so he's marginally ahead. Fox can field, but isn't much of a hitter. Lopes is an okay fielder and an okay hitter. He probably won't kill you, but won't help much either. A platoon starring a guy nicknamed 'Boots' for his defensive skills and Freddie Sanchez will not end well.

Third Baseman
1. '28 Rogers Hornsby (SJE)
2. '98 Scott Rolen (ONE)
3. '64 Brooks Robinson (WEB)
4. '89 Matt Williams (ALB)
5. '11 Placido Polanco (WAU)

Hornsby isn't much of a fielder at third, but he can hit, and that's what's important here. Rolen is a great fielder and usually hasn't completely sucked at bat. Brooks is there for his glove alone. Matt Williams will hit 25 home runs and bat .220 in the Super-League. Polanco is just a bad idea.

Shortstop
1. '30 Joe Cronin (ONE)
2. '84 Julio Franco (SJE)
3. '57 Luis Aparicio (ALB)
4. '64 Luis Aparicio (WEB)
5. '11 Jimmy Rollins (WAU)

Cronin is by far the best player here, in that he can hit and field. Franco can hit, but isn't much of a fielder, especially at SS. The Aparicios can't hit. At all. Make peace with that now and don't bitch at me when they're hitting .240 with no home runs. '11 Rollins sucks according to Bruzer and who am I to question him?

Left Field
1. '99 Barry Bonds (WEB)
2. '67 Hank Aaron (SJE)
3. '57 Minnie Minoso (ALB)
4. '29 Lefty O'Doul (WAU)
5. '23 Bobby Veach (ONE)

Bonds is better than Aaron because he had access to better PEDs. That's the cruel truth of the matter. Minnie Minoso was underrated. Lefty O'Doul hit something like .350 in his career which sound impressive as long as you don't ask too many question about just how he did that. Bobby Veach is not the answer.

Center Field
1. '23 Ty Cobb (ONE)
2. '90 Kirby Puckett (WEB)
3. '84 Brett Butler (SJE)
4. '57 Larry Doby (ALB)
5. '11 Shane Victorino (WAU)

Cobb is Cobb is Cobb is Cobb. Puckett was pretty good too, even if he didn't really have the range for center by '90. Butler was good at being a leadoff man, but didn't have eye-popping stats for the most part. Also, he mainly played for lovely teams. Doby was getting on in years by '57. Victorino is probably a cool dude in real life. This is not real life.

Right Field
1. '34 Mel Ott (ALB)
2. '03 Ichiro Suzuki (SJE)
3. '29 Chuck Klein (WAU)
4. '23 Harry Heilmann (ONE)
5. '32 Babe Herman (WEB)

Ott is the only player here I wouldn't think about replacing in the draft. Suzuki is good, but he doesn't really have the power or patience I want out of a corner outfielder. Klein, Heilmann and Herman are all average right-fielders in the Super-League, but not a lot more.

SP1
1. '17 Walter Johnson (WAU)
2. '34 Carl Hubbell (ALB)
3. '08 Ed Walsh (ONE)
4. '84 Bert Blyleven (SJE)
5. '68 Denny McLain (WEB)

I don't think there's a lot controversial about any of these rankings. Maybe you disagree about Hubbell being above Walsh, but I think that Hubbell is probably the better pitcher, even if not by a lot. McLain did win 31 games in 1968, but that was in a crazy run environment, and Mogul does not look kindly on the brevity of his career.

SP2
1. '74 Don Sutton (SJE)
2. '11 Roy Halladay (WAU)
3. '08 Frank Smith (ONE)
4. '89 Mike Krukow (ALB)
5. '68 Les Cain (WEB)

Sutton has always done better than Halladay in the Super-League. Just ask Marauder, who has used both of them. Smith, Krukow and Cain are going to need to be replaced. Especially Cain. Why are you using Cain? Do not use Cain.

SP3
1. '10 Addie Joss (WAU)
2. '74 Andy Messersmith (SJE)
3. '57 Billy Pierce (ALB)
4. '23 Hooks Dauss (ONE)
5. '32 Red Lucas (WEB)

Oddly enough, this is a stronger group that the SP2s. Joss has usually been among the best of the deadball pitchers, even if he's less than a year away from death. Messersmith has usually been decent enough in the Super-League, and he deserves credit for killing the reserve clause. Billy Pierce is okay, even if a '50s power pitcher doesn't strike out as many guys as you'd like, Hooks Dauss sounds like he's a pitcher that works as a gangster in his spare time. Red Lucas probably won't kill your team by himself.

SP4
1. '94 Pedro Martinez (SJE)
2. '34 Hal Schumacher (ALB)
3. '64 Dave McNally (WEB)
4. '11 Cole Hamels (WAU)
5. '08 Doc White (ONE)

Not a single objectionable one in the bunch! Granted, that's because expectations for SP4s aren't really that high.

Closer
1. '77 Dennis Eckersley (SJE)
2. '11 Brad Lidge (WAU)
3. '89 Craig Lefferts (ALB)
4. '04 Mike Gonzalez (WEB)
5. '23 Bert Cole (ONE)

Eck wins by virtue of the fact that he's the only one who isn't soul-crushingly terrible. Congrats to him.

Sub-Tropical Division (No-DH)

Catcher
1. '56 Roy Campanella (CAN)
2. '81 Gary Carter (FLD)
3. '62 Tom Haller (FFD)
4. '87 Benito Santiago (VEN)
5. '04 Mike Grady (CAT)

Campy is a Hall of Famer even though his career got short due a car accident. Carter has never quite lived up to the hype in the Super-League, though maybe a younger model will do a bit better. Tom Haller is almost exactly average for a Super-League catcher. Benito Santiago played for roughly 4000 teams during his career. Maybe that's because that many teams really wanted him to play for them, but I'm pretty sure it was really because he was disposable. Mike Grady will hit .220 with no home runs. You need to accept that.

First Baseman
1. '62 Orlando Cepeda (FFD)
2. '83 Eddie Murray (FLD)
3. '56 Gil Hodges (CAN)
4. '87 John Kruk (VEN)
5. '28 Del Bissonette (CAT)

Cepeda: Hall of Famer, even though he was always kind of a 2nd-tier first baseman. Murray: Hall of Famer, even though he was always kind of a 2nd-tier first baseman. Hodges: Near Hall of Famer, even though he was always kind of 2nd-tier first baseman. Kruk: Once portrayed by Chris Farley on Saturday Night Live. Bissonette: NO!

Second Baseman
1. '24 Joe Sewell/'56 Jackie Robinson (CAN)
2. '03 Michael Young (FFD)
3. '09 Ben Zobrist (VEN)
4. '10 Johnny Evers (CAT)
5. '46 Buddy Blattner (FLD)

Sewell/Robinson is a combination of a shortstop and an old guy. And yet it's still the most promising in this group. Young will hit for average and that is all he will ever do for a team. Zobrist has skills that I don't think Mogul fully appreciates. Johnny Evers will make you cry. Buddy Blattner is named 'Buddy Blattnet'. Do you really think a guy named 'Buddy Blattner' is going to be anything other than a complete disaster?

Third Baseman
1. '67 Ron Santo (FLD)
2. '09 Evan Longoria (VEN)
3. '02 John McGraw (CAN)
4. '62 Jim Davenport (FFD)
5. '28 Harvey Hendrick (CAT)

Santo can do everything well, even if he doesn't do anything great. He's not going to be the best hitter or fielder on your team, but he will do good things for you. Longoria should be good, though he's never been in the Super-League before. John McGraw is tricky. My guess is decent contact but not a lot else. Davenport will be replaced in the Dispersal Draft. Here's what concerns me about Hendrick: he played for five National League teams in four seasons in the '30s, and that was in era without a ton of roster movement and when it was very, very hard for players to change leagues. That's a red flag.

Shortstop
1. '03 Alex Rodriguez (FFD)
2. '83 Cal Ripken (FLD)
3. '35 Joe Cronin (CAN)
4. '03 Miguel Tejada (VEN)
5. '86 Dick Schofield (CAT)

A-Rod has been erratic in the Super-League, but he's still the only SS that can get you more than 25 home runs in the Super-League. Young Ripken is also damned good, though. Old Cronin is slowing down in the field, which is really great for a middle infielder, but at least he can still hit. I've never been a fan of Tejada in the Super-League, but maybe you'll have better luck. Dick Schofield, whether junior or senior, has no place in the Super-League.

Left Field
1. '81 Tim Raines (FLD)
2. '62 Felipe Alou (FFD)
3. '09 Carl Crawford (VEN)
4. '86 Brian Downing (CAT)
5. '24 Riggs Stephenson (CAN)

Raines will be a good leadoff man. Enjoy. Alou will be okay. Not great, but okay. Crawford has tools, but not the skills to use those tools, as the Red Sox learned to their detriment. Downing was a great power hitter...for the '80s, when power wasn't what it was today. He'll be good in the field, though. I know Cthulhu has a bizarre fetish for Riggs, but I don't share it.

Center Field
1. '62 Willie Mays (FFD)
2. '93 Ken Griffey, Jr. (VEN)
3. '81 Andre Dawson (FLD)
4. '24 Tris Speaker (CAN)
5. '10 Solly Hoffman (CAT)

Mays is the greatest center fielder to play in the Major Leagues, and he's in his prime. Griffey was also pretty good, even if he never was quite as good as Mays. Dawson means a lot to Cubs and Expos fans, even if he seemed to believe that drawing a walk made him less of a man. Speaker was a good player, but he was in his late '30s by '24, and the chances of him getting through a season without burning out or getting injured are not great. Solly Hoffman sounds like an accountant, and not a good one.

Right Field
1. '56 Duke Snider (CAN)
2. '87 Tony Gwynn (VEN)
3. '67 Billy Williams (FLD)
4. '28 Babe Herman (CAT)
5. '62 Willie McCovey (FFD)

Silver Fox, mother-fuckers! He's also been good for about 30 home runs in the Super-League, which is elite power in this league. Tony Gwynn won't hit a ton of home runs, or even that many doubles, but he'll hit a ton of singles and play credible defense. Billy Williams, like Santo, is a guy who will help you, but won't have spectacular numbers in the process. Babe Herman is average. McCovey is a great hitter BUT HE IS NOT A RIGHT FIELDER!

SP1
1. '62 Juan Marichal (FFD)
2. '02 Joe McGinnty (CAN)
3. '28 Dazzy Vance (CAT)
4. '67 Fergie Jenkins (FLD)
5. '93 Randy Johnson (VEN)

Solid group. I like Marichal because he has a proven track record, but Vance and Jenkins have also been decent enough in the Super-League. McGinnty has never played in the Super-League, but I have high hopes for him. Young Johnson is going to be wild, let's hope not disastrously so.

SP2
1. '78 Rick Reuschel (FFD)
2. '03 Tim Hudson (VEN)
3. '10 King Cole (CAT)
4. '02 Tom Hughes (CAN)
5. '83 Mike Boddicker (FLD)

Every last one of them mediocre.

SP3
1. '35 Lefty Grove (CAN)
2. '10 Mordecai Brown (CAT)
3. '09 David Price (VEN)
4. '87 Bob Welch (FFD)
5. '81 Bill Gullickson (FLD)

Grove has burned people before, but he's also helped a few teams. Brown needs a good infield behind him or things will get ugly. I honest don't know how David Price will do in the Super-League. Bob Welch? BOB WELCH?! Why do you people keep bringing more Bob Welches into the Super-League? Gullickson is going to be a disaster.

SP4
1. '24 Stan Coveleski (CAN)
2. '09 James Shields (VEN)
3. '87 Fernando Valenzuela (FFD)
4. '83 Scott McGregor (FLD)
5. '86 John Candelaria (CAT)

Coveleski is pretty good, even though he also needs a decent defense behind him. James Shields should be interesting, even if not exactly great. Fernandomania can never die, but his arm sure as gently caress could, and Lasorda had basically already broken it by '87. Scott McGregor usually punches above his weight in the Super-League.

Who can disappoint you?
Make your team look bad?
Send you to the Gauntlet and make you feel sad?
The Candy Man can!

Closer
1. '78 Bruce Sutter (FFD)
2. '03 Keith Foulke (VEN)
3. '92 Jeff Montgomery (CAN)
4. '86 Donnie Moore (CAT)
5. '83 Tippy Martinez (FLD)

Sutter had the awesome splitter and should have gone into the Hall of Famer as a Cub. loving Cardinals, ruining everything. Foulke and Montgomery are both serviceable. Donnie Moore was pretty good, but the fact that he was blew a save so badly that it eventually led him to suicide doesn't exactly bode well for his chances of being good in the Super-League. Tippy Martinez' greatest asset is having his nickname be 'Tippy.'

Laissez Faire Division (DH)

Catcher
1. '95 Mike Piazza (NFK)
2. '72 Thurman Munson (HAR)
3. '86 Mickey Tettleton (CUB)
4. '04 Javy Lopez (CLO)
5. '11 Miguel Montero (SPO)

Piazza is pretty far ahead of the rest of the group here. Munson is a great catcher, but not much of a pilot. Tettleton is kind of like a switch-hitting Daulton, though with less defensive skills. Also, he's not quite a completely batshit insane as Daulton. Lopez used a ton of PEDs to hit 42 home runs in a season once, but was also famous as a catcher that Maddux refused to work with. That is a just a long way of saying that, like all Orioles free agent signings of the past fifteen years, he is going to let you down. Montero is okay, though he's probably better as a backup.

First Baseman
1. '12 Albert Pujols (SPO)
2. '11 Paul Konerko (CLO)
3. '95 Wade Boggs (HAR)
4. '03 John Olerud (NFK)
5. '04 Adam LaRoche (CUB)

Pujols may have had a down year, and is almost certainly on the downside of his career, but he is still Albert Pujols. If I were a Sox fan, I would probably have warm feelings about Konerko and his quest to reach 500 home runs and possibly the Hall of Fame. As a Cubs fan, however, I laugh at the notion that Konerko would ever be voted into the Hall of Fame. He'll do okay for your team, though. Wade Boggs isn't really a first baseman and is pretty washed up by 1995. In fact, I'm pretty sure that the only things he did in the '90s were: 1. Guest starring on the Simpsons. 2. Ride a horse during the 1996 Yankees celebration parade. John Olerud is old, but he's at least better than Adam LaRoche.

Second Baseman
1. '00 Jeff Kent (SPO)
2. '04 Lou Whitaker (NFK)
3. '04 Brian Roberts (CLO)
4. '04 Marcus Giles (CUB)
5. '76 Dave Cash (HAR)

Jeff Kent is an rear end in a top hat who probably took PEDs, crashed his motorcycle and lied about it so he wouldn't get in trouble with his team, and donated a ton of money to fight gay marriage in California. And then he went on loving Survivor. But he's still a good hitter. Lou Whitaker is a decent all-arounder. Brian Roberts had a few good years before concussions destroyed his career. But Mogul probably doesn't model that. Marcus Giles also looked good for a couple of years before completely falling apart. Cash will need to be...cashiered? No, Smasher, you're better than that, drat it! But he will need to be replaced.

Third Baseman
1. '76 Mike Schmidt (HAR)
2. '04 Chipper Jones (CUB)
3. '86 Wade Boggs (NFK)
4. '12 Ryan Zimmerman (CLO)
5. '12 Mark Trumbo (SPO)

Schmidt is the greatest third baseman of all-time. Accept it. Jones has better power that Boggs, and I favor that. Still, it's pretty close between the two. Ryan Zimmerman is a quality player, even if he isn't going to turn around a team by himself. The only question with Trumbo is whether he'll strike out 175 or 200 times in the Super-League.

Shortstop
1. '87 Cal Ripken (NFK)
2. '95 Derek Jeter (HAR)
3. '04 Rafael Furcal (CUB)
4. '04 Miguel Tejada (CLO)
5. '00 Rich Aurilia (SPO)

Ripken is a stud, Jeter is too young, and Furcal, old Tejada and Aurilia are just filler.

Left Field
1. '72 Willie Stargell (NFK)
2. '86 Jose Canseco (CUB)
3. '72 Bobby Murcer (HAR)
4. '12 Jayson Werth (CLO)
5. '11 Justin Upton (SPO)

Stargell isn't great, but he's the best. Canseco will have severe OBP issues, though he does have great (if mainly synthetic) home run power. Bobby Murcer's fielding is kind of wasted in left. Jayson Werth is middling in the Super-League, but at least you don't have to worry about financing his contract. Based on Justin and B.J., I'm guess Upton is Welsh for 'disappointment.'

Center Field
1. '58 Mickey Mantle (NFK)
2. '12 Mike Trout (SPO)
3. '51 Richie Ashburn (CUB)
4. '76 Garry Maddox (HAR)
5. '12 Bryce Harper (CLO)

Mantle is an all-time great. The day may come when Trout proves himself as good as Mantle, but we're a long ways away from that. Ashburn and Maddox are both elite Phillies center fielders, but Ashburn's walks give him the edge. Bryce Harper was a phenom for the first half, and then fizzled in the second half. Which one do you think you'll get?

Right Field
1. '00 Barry Bonds (SPO)
2. '10 Ty Cobb (NFK)
3. '64 Roberto Clemente (CLO)
4. '04 J.D. Drew (CUB)
5. '95 Bernie Williams (HAR)

Whoever put Bonds at first, here's what I want you to do. Find, by any means necessary, a video of the end of the 1992 NLCS and watch carefully what happens when the fate of a team depends of the strength of Barry Bonds' throwing arm. Cobb is Cobb, as always. Clemente is considered one of the greatest defensive right-fielders of all-times, but his lack of power and walks may prove a bit grating. J.D. Drew is essentially the anti-Clemente, right down to being born in a plane crash. Bernie Williams' loses value because his defense isn't as amazing in right field.

Designated Hitter
1. '11 Miguel Cabrera (NFK)
2. '95 Paul O'Neill (HAR)
3. '00 Ellis Burks (SPO)
4. '86 Dave Kingman (CUB)
5. '04 Melvin Mora (CLO)

Miguel Cabrera is a fantastic hitter, and DH happens to be his natural fielding position. O'Neill would mean something to me if I were a Yankees fan, but I'm not, so I'm not terribly impressed. Burks was solid, but outside of the thin air of Denver, he was mainly ordinary in his career. Dave Kingman can hit home runs and mail dead rats to reporters he doesn't like. He's a double-threat! Mora makes me sad just thinking about him.

SP1
1. '51 Robin Roberts (CUB)
2. '76 Steve Carlton (HAR)
3. '08 Mordecai Brown (NFK)
4. '12 Zack Greinke (SPO)
5. '12 Steven Strasburg (CLO)

Roberts was legitimately great before overuse broke his arm, but this is before that happened. Carlton has been hit-or-miss in the Super-League, but he's worth another roll. Brown is going to be as good as the defense behind him. Zack Greinke is a guy I like, and he's been solid enough in the Super-League, even if casting him as your ace is probably overly optimistic. Strasburg is still very young, and Mogul seems like a mean enough game to blow out his rotator cuff in spring training just because it can.

SP2
1. '11 Justin Verlander (NFK)
2. '12 Jered Weaver (SPO)
3. '76 Jim Kaat (HAR)
4. '11 Mark Buehrle (CLO)
5. '50 Ned Garver (CUB)

Verlander was the MVP, even if he's occasionally awful in the Super-League. Weaver is another guy I like, even he's been a bit up and down in the Super-League. Kaat and Buehrle are both control lefties. They tend to have problems in the Super-League. Ned Garver played for the Browns. That is a bad thing.

SP3
1. '06 Johan Santana (NFK)
2. '95 David Cone (HAR)
3. '12 Gio Gonzalez (CLO)
4. '04 Russ Ortiz (CUB)
5. '00 Livan Hernandez (SPO)

Power arms tend to do okay in the Super-League, so Santana, Cone and Gonzalez are all okay. Inning-eaters eat teams, so Ortiz and Hernandez are basically ticking time bombs.

SP4
1. '72 Bob Gibson (HAR)
2. '86 Curt Young (CUB)
3. '64 Bob Veale (CLO)
4. '11 Daniel Hudson (SPO)
5. '10 Ed Summers (NFK)

Old Gibson is okay. The rest...not so much.

Closer
1. '04 John Smoltz (CUB)
2. '72 Sparky Lyle (HAR)
3. '00 Robb Nen (SPO)
4. '11 Chris Sale (CLO)
5. '92 Tom Henke (NFK)

I trust Smoltz a bit more than Lyle because he was a better pitcher overall and a right-hander. Nen should be good, even if he's only going to give you 40 innings or so a year probably. Sale is younger than Henke.

Already Relegated Division (DH)

Catcher
1. '78 Carlton Fisk (BAR)
2. '70 Joe Torre (NOM)
3. '64 Elston Howard (NEA)
4. '11 Jarrod Saltalamacchia (PHF)
5. '06 Ivan Rodriguez (SSS)

Fisk can hit and field. Torre can hit but not field. Howard can field but not hit. Saltalamacchia has a freakishly long name that, unfortunately, doesn't make him anymore than a marginal Super-Leaguer. Old I-Rod is just bad news.

First Baseman
1. '70 Dick Allen (NOM)
2. '11 Adrian Gonzalez (PHF)
3. '78 Carl Yastrzemski (BAR)
4. '97 Mo Vaughn (NEW)
5. '99 Mike Sweeney (SSS)

Not the strongest of groups. Allen is probably the best of a lot, even if poor luck and injuries kept him from the Hall of Fame. A-Gon is hard to figure out, but I think Mogul will like him. Yaz is old, but should still be okay, even if he should probably stay out of the outfield. Mo Vaughn should also be good, even if he's not going to be an MVP in the Super-League or anything. Mike Sweeney is okay. Just okay.

Second Baseman
1. '11 Dustin Pedroia (PHF)
2. '98 Craig Biggio (NOM)
3. '51 Red Schoendienst (BAR)
4. '06 Placido Polanco (SSS)
5. '45 Snuffy Stirnweiss (NEA)

Why Pedroia over Biggio? I'm not quite sure. Just a feeling, I guess, based on past performance by both players. I could be wrong about that, though. Schoendienst is a bit old in '51, but should still be decent. Polanco is filler, just like in real life. Trusting a guy named 'Snuffy' to help you is just bad business.

Third Baseman
1. '11 Kevin Youkilis (PHF)
2. '99 Joe Randa (SSS)
3. '97 John Valentin (NEA)
4. '10 Chone Figgins (NOM)
5. '12 Bobby Byrne (BAR)

Terrible, terrible, terrible group. Youk is the only good hitter, so I guess he wins by default. Randa had his moments, but seeing as he retired only five or so years ago and I can barely remember him, I'm not sure I'd trust him to be good for me. John Valentin was getting old in '97, but could hit a bit. Figgins and Byrne are going to let you down. Way down.

Shortstop
1. '12 Honus Wagner (BAR)
2. '97 Nomar Garciaparra (NEA)
3. '64 Jim Fregosi (NOM)
4. '06 Carlos Guillen (SSS)
5. '92 Ozzie Smith (PHF)

Honus was the best shortstop ever. EVER! Nomar was in his pre-injury days when he, Jeter and A-Rod were considered the holy trinity of shortstops. Fregosi might have been the best overall shortstop of his era, and, but for injuries and a quick decline, would be a Hall of Famer. Carlos Guillen is filler. Ozzie Smith can't hit and he's old. That is a very, very bad combination. Best to chuck him in the Mystery Spot.

Left Field
1. '51 Stan Musial (BAR)
2. '57 Ted Williams (NEA)
3. '98 Moises Alou (NOM)
4. '99 Johnny Damon (SSS)
5. '11 Carl Crawford (PHF)

Williams, on the whole, was a better hitter, but this is a prime Musial against an old Williams. If Damon were in center, maybe he'd be better than Alou, but in left, Alou's power is more valuable. The cries of a million Red Sox fans force me to list Crawford last.

Center Field
1. '64 Mickey Mantle (NEA)
2. '99 Carlos Beltran (SSS)
3. '78 Fred Lynn (BAR)
4. '10 Ichiro Suzuki (NOM)
5. '92 Ray Lankford (PHF)

Mantle is old and gimpy in '64, but I still would bet on him. Carlos Beltran has always been pretty solid in the Super-League. Fred Lynn is also pretty good, even if he's never reached his potential in the Super-League. Old Suzuki in center can only end in tragedy. Lankford is only okay.

Right Field
1. '64 Roger Maris (NEA)
2. '05 Lance Berkman (PHF)
3. '51 Enos Slaughter (BAR)
4. '06 Magglio Ordonez (SSS)
5. '98 Carl Everett (NOM)

Maris is still only three years away from hitting 61 home runs, and will get credit for that. Berkman is okay, but not a lot more than that. Enos Slaughter's nickname was 'Country'. I'm not sure if that's great or terrible. Probably terrible. Ordonez couldn't really field by '06. Carl Everett doesn't believe in dinosaurs, then again, dinosaurs don't believe that a corner outfielder with a career OPS+ of 107 should be starting for you.

Designated Hitter
1. '18 Babe Ruth (SSS)
2. '98 Jeff Bagwell (NOM)
3. '11 David Ortiz (PHF)
4. '78 Jim Rice (BAR)
5. '45 Charlie Keller (NEA)

Ruth winning isn't exactly the boldest analysis I've ever written. Bagwell is probably a bit better than Ortiz, though not by a ton. I once got into a drunken argument over whether Jim Rice should be in the Hall of Fame. It turns out that whether or not Rice's numbers were inflated by Fenway Park, his supporters' have very hard fists. Charlie Keller's career was cut short by injury, and Mogul will downgrade him as a result.

SP1
1. '10 Felix Hernandez (NOM)
2. '18 Carl Mays (SSS)
3. '05 Roger Clemens (PHF)
4. '64 Whitey Ford (NEA)
5. '12 Babe Adams (BAR)

King Felix is the entire reason that Seattle hasn't sunken itself into the sea out of depression, and that deserves some recognition. Carl Mays was a good pitcher who really knew how to keep batters away from the plate. He's been sold in the Super-League. Clemens is old, and Mogul doesn't model HGH. Fair warning. Ford is also old, and didn't have a chance to use HGH. Babe Adams is filler.

SP2
1. '98 Randy Johnson (NOM)
2. '18 Bullet Joe Bush (SSS)
3. '05 Andy Pettitte (PHF)
4. '57 Frank Sullivan (NEA)
5. '12 Howie Camnitz (BAR)

I love power pitching, and so I will give Randy Johnson a million chances to make me look stupid by believing in him. Bullet Joe Bush got his name as the result of a nasty incident where he shot a state senator after a game. That may or may not be accurate. Andy Pettitte is an old control lefty. What could go wrong? Frank Sullivan last was part of the Super-League as part of the second Newport Sharks. That's a bad thing. Howie Camnitz is just another deadballer.

SP3
1. '19 Pete Alexander (PHF)
2. '06 Justin Verlander (SSS)
3. '10 Cliff Lee (NOM)
4. '12 Claude Hendrix (BAR)
5. '64 Jim Bouton (NEA)

Alexander is the closest thing to a sure thing as there is for a Super-League pitcher. Verlander is usually solid. Usually. Cliff Lee has been good for a couple of teams this year, but has been bad for a lot of other teams before then. Claude Hendrix is just another deadballer again. Jim Bouton was only in a position to write Ball Four because he was such a marginal pitcher.

SP4
1. '70 Bob Gibson (NOM)
2. '97 Tim Wakefield (NEA)
3. '19 Hippo Vaughn (PHF)
4. '12 Marty O'Toole (BAR)
5. '06 Kenny Rogers (SSS)

Gibson is still pretty good in '70. He should do you proud. I want to believe in Tim Wakefield, I really, really do. Hippo Vaughn had a short career that is going to hurt his rating. Marty O'Toole is just another deadballer yet again. Kenny Rogers is old, can't throw a fastball above 80, and was terrible at covering up his use of pine tar. This will not end well.

Closer
1. '11 Jonathan Papelbon (PHF)
2. '78 Bill Campbell (BAR)
3. '10 David Aardsma (NOM)
4. '97 Tom Gordon (NEA)
5. '06 Todd Jones (SSS)

Papelbon is the only good closer of the bunch. Bill Campbell is just okay. David Aardsma is half-power, half-sentient injury. Tom "Flash" Gordon is a fine setup man, but as a closer? I'm not so sure. It takes a bold man to put a 38 year-old with a 3.9 K/9 in as a closer, much in the same way it takes a bold man to jump out of an airplane without a parachute in the belief that the fear of death will unlock the mind's hidden power of telekinesis and save him from certain death.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 07:22

Senerio: Oct 19, 2009; Roëmænce is ælive!

(Out of character: Sorry, I just noticed this, and I am not actually mad)

Senerio posted:

Home Stadium: The Nexus (Actually US Cellular field but with the NexSES logo)

UZworm posted:

Home Stadium: The Oneida Castle
(Same specs as U.S. Cellular Field)

You are disrespecting me by using my field and renaming it to such a bad name.
My honor has been sullied. I demand a best of seven series and to be shown the respect I am deserved.

Senerio fucked around with this message at 09:47 on Oct 23, 2012

# ? Oct 23, 2012 09:41

CVE: Jan 27, 2012

factorialite posted:

what was cve's proposal? must have missed it.

I'll quote it for you. Must have been lost between all the EC lineups.

quote:

Juggernauts

As has come to my attention you are trying to gather all the Foxxes. I would offer you my copy of Jimmie Foxx, which while young (coming from the 1927 Athletics) has been rock solid for me.

In return I would ask for Kirby Puckett, John Smoltz, Tom Glavine, Carl Yastrzemski and Brandon Webb. This may seem like a lot, but you aren't using most of these guys at the moment and Yastrzemski is surplus once you have Foxx.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 10:15

BearDrivingTruck: Oct 15, 2011; You see the most shocking sights sometimes

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Evaluations

Hmm. Are we still allowed to do trades right now? I have an idea which might help me or screw me over.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 16:15

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

BearDrivingTruck posted:

Hmm. Are we still allowed to do trades right now? I have an idea which might help me or screw me over.

If you don't want to find your ace suddenly sidelined for the season before the season starts, I'd hold on until we get the EC going.

I'm finishing up the rosters today.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 16:34

ForeverBWFC: Oct 19, 2011; Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

Moseby goes in to give Snider a rest when we aren't playing the Cultists.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 17:39

UZworm: Feb 9, 2009; Young wild Elsweyrian
C'mon baby, do you have a soul gem

Senerio posted:

(Out of character: Sorry, I just noticed this, and I am not actually mad)

You are disrespecting me by using my field and renaming it to such a bad name.
My honor has been sullied. I demand a best of seven series and to be shown the respect I am deserved.

Actually are we allowed to have duplicate stadiums? I never noticed that. I can switch it back to Coors Field if you want.

(Also everything involved with Oneida, NY and surrounding areas is automatically terrible.)

# ? Oct 23, 2012 17:39

Senerio: Oct 19, 2009; Roëmænce is ælive!

UZworm posted:

Actually are we allowed to have duplicate stadiums? I never noticed that. I can switch it back to Coors Field if you want.

(Also everything involved with Oneida, NY and surrounding areas is automatically terrible.)

Yeah we're allowed to have fields that are the same dimensions. Also I'm probably not going to be in SLVIII anyway.

I'm not actually mad, I'm just having fun with my character before my team is inevitably relegated and I come up with a new one.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 18:02

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Smasher League Week 15 Injury Report

We have a new Television Champion!

Finger Lakes Phoenixes
Mark Bellhorn (IF) (They say, before the end comes, all of the Bellhorns will suffer injuries at the same time) - 11 days

Luna Landers
J.R. Richard (SP) (Out of Borrowed Time) - 12 days

Norfolk Splinter Cells
Mickey Mantle (CF) (Another Victim of the Military-Industrial Complex) - 19 days

Rated R Superstars
Chris Perez (RP) (Speared!) - Out for Season

# ? Oct 23, 2012 19:07

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

mentholmoose posted:

Here's the post for the Failures: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3499603&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=37#post408666713

You have 29 players on your roster. Trim to 28 ASAP.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 19:28

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

cbx posted:

You have 29 players on your roster. Trim to 28 ASAP.

Well, that's an auspicious start for my team, I can't even count.

Just drop Scutaro from the roster. I've edited the post to change it.

mentholmoose fucked around with this message at 20:28 on Oct 23, 2012

# ? Oct 23, 2012 20:20

The Goog: Aug 6, 2007; It's a Goog Day, yes it is!

The Superstars will put Perez on the DL and recall 2006 Brandon League. New bullpen arrangement:

LR Jason Motte
MR Tug McGraw
SR Brandon League
SR Jesse Orosco
SU Joaquin Benoit
CL BJ Ryan

Also, mentholmoose, I have interest in some pieces from your feeders that you're not presently using. What would you want for the 2011 vintages of Jon Lester, Marco Scutaro and Bobby Jenks?

# ? Oct 23, 2012 20:35

Senerio: Oct 19, 2009; Roëmænce is ælive!

mentholmoose posted:

Well, that's an auspicious start for my team, I can't even count.

Just drop Scutaro from the roster. I've edited the post to change it.

Well it's fitting.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 20:37

factorialite: Mar 3, 2008; by Lowtax

I have to reject the trade that involves 5 key players of my team for one, even if it is Jimmie Foxx. The world will never know a QuintaFoxx team...

# ? Oct 23, 2012 21:01

BearDrivingTruck: Oct 15, 2011; You see the most shocking sights sometimes

cbx posted:

If you don't want to find your ace suddenly sidelined for the season before the season starts, I'd hold on until we get the EC going. I'm finishing up the rosters today.

Okay.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 22:14

CraigK: Nov 4, 2008; by exmarx

mentholmoose posted:

Well, that's an auspicious start for my team, I can't even count.

Just drop Scutaro from the roster. I've edited the post to change it.

Dropping NLCS MVP Marco Scutaro from your team??? Are you insane?????

Also, I see that I have a drat sexy infield (minus 3B), a drat drat sexy rotation, and a :stonk:

outfield. Gotta fix that.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 22:31

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

Update for all you new owners:

I'm currently inputting the lineups and strategies that you guys have implemented for your teams, while patching rosters where necessary (any time there's a period in the player's name, it doesn't load them into the game, so I have to create them manually. Also, Bryce Harper was invisible for some reason).

So far, I'm about halfway through on this, and it's the last part before we start the EC, so thanks for your patience.

# ? Oct 23, 2012 22:38

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# ? May 13, 2024 07:50

BrooklynBruiser: Aug 20, 2006

No-DH lineup against lefties:

1. Jimmy Rollins, SS
2. Nap Lajoie, 1B
3. Chuck Klein, RF
4. Lefty O'Doul, LF
5. Joe Jackson, CF
6. Chase Utley, 2B
7. Spud Davis, C
8. Pitcher
9. Placido Polanco, 3B

No-DH lineup against righties:

1. Jimmy Rollins, SS
2. Nap Lajoie, 2B
3. Ryan Howard, 1B
4. Chuck Klein, RF
5. Lefty O'Doul, LF
6. Joe Jackson, CF
7. Spud Davis, C
8. Pitcher
9. Placido Polanco, 3B

(If you can't put the pitcher in the 8th slot, bat Polanco 8th.)

# ? Oct 24, 2012 00:36

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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