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Guido van Possum
Apr 7, 2012

by T. Finninho
bizzaro universe troi and normal universe crusher lesbian sex scene to be featured in jj treck 2

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Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat
vi has a lot of character and spirit but its plot is ridiculous. you can really tell that the script was written in six weeks and it's offensive how shatner butchered sulu's role in the climax. at least change sulu's log so there isn't a discrepancy with who's studying "gaseous anomalies" you wienerlord.

haveblue
Aug 15, 2005



Toilet Rascal
they also cut the reason for the "omg get the printed klingon dictionary" scene which makes that scene even dumber than it had to be

Elder Postsman
Aug 30, 2000


i used hot bot to search for "teens"

Kirk posted:

uh oh news just leaked that sisko tricked the romulons into the war and he's in some serious loving danger, dispatch the enterprise-e to pick him up from his assignment near the neutral zone before the romulons get to him. meanwhile there's gonna be a shitload of tension between empires while you do that.

ok we got here and OH NO ROMULONS ARE ATTACKING BECAUSE THEY'RE TRYING TO ABDUCT SISKO SO HE CAN PAY FOR HIS CRIMES picard must make a hard decision that federation rule of law overrules romulon justice, and after disabling the sweet big-screen CGI d'deirex class warship he converses with the romulon captain for awhile trying to justify his decision about taking sisko to stand before a federation tribunal while meanwhile the romulon captain is like "do you know how many loving family members i lost in the war? you are scum and your stupid gay federation for idiots is going to fall because of this"

and then we get to have scenes where sisko is in a holding cell sitting there with the weight of the entire dominion war on his shoulders and he tries to justify his actions to picard or someone who, while deep down they agree it was the right choice so that DEMOCRACY WOULD WIN, have to hold him to task about it. PICARD WOULD PROBABLY PRETTY CONFLICTED AND THEN SISKO IS LIKE "WELL WE CAN'T ALL BE SAINTS... LOCUTUS."

and then it's basically a race against time to stop war from breaking out while at the same time seeing that justice is properly served and that sisko doesn't go before a kangaroo court on romulus. if you really want to go nuts, the enterprise-e takes sisko TO romulus after they stop off for his hearing on earth, and they have to defend him in a romulon court while at the same time trying to stop his assassination

call it 'star trek x: trial by fire' or something equally gay

there i just wrote some star trek fan fiction i hope you assholes are happy for making me do this

this is a better movie than all of the tng films combined

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:
if they made tos movies after everyone got old and fat why can't they make a tng one now

Elder Postsman
Aug 30, 2000


i used hot bot to search for "teens"

Al! posted:

if they made tos movies after everyone got old and fat why can't they make a tng one now

cuz Brent spiner is old and fat

ol qwerty bastard
Dec 13, 2005

If you want something done, do it yourself!

Guido van Possum posted:

bizzaro universe troi and normal universe crusher lesbian sex scene to be featured in jj treck 2

I'll take mirror universe Ezri and normal universe Jadzia

would that be considered masturbation?

raruler
Oct 5, 2003

“Here lies a toppled god —
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.”

dur posted:

cuz Brent spiner is old and fat

"good lord data, what happened to your face?"

"plasma bong explosion in engineering, geordi had to rebuild it with parts from a borg droid, that is why I now look like Channing Tatum, sir"

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:

dur posted:

cuz Brent spiner is old and fat

well he basically became a real boy by the end so maybe he discovered plans for an aging chip as well

Hugh G. Rectum
Mar 1, 2011

Al! posted:

well he basically became a real boy by the end so maybe he discovered plans for an aging chip as well

you'd have to retcon all good things

Nomnom Cookie
Aug 30, 2009



Sudo Echo posted:

you'd have to retcon all good things

time clone from the underverse

Heresiarch
Oct 6, 2005

Literature is not exhaustible, for the sufficient and simple reason that no single book is. A book is not an isolated being: it is a relationship, an axis of innumerable relationships.

raruler posted:

plasma bong

LP97S
Apr 25, 2008

Sudo Echo posted:

you'd have to retcon all good things

Riker's plugs.

qntm
Jun 17, 2009

Kirk posted:

uh oh news just leaked that sisko tricked the romulons into the war and he's in some serious loving danger, dispatch the enterprise-e to pick him up from his assignment near the neutral zone before the romulons get to him. meanwhile there's gonna be a shitload of tension between empires while you do that.

ok we got here and OH NO ROMULONS ARE ATTACKING BECAUSE THEY'RE TRYING TO ABDUCT SISKO SO HE CAN PAY FOR HIS CRIMES picard must make a hard decision that federation rule of law overrules romulon justice, and after disabling the sweet big-screen CGI d'deirex class warship he converses with the romulon captain for awhile trying to justify his decision about taking sisko to stand before a federation tribunal while meanwhile the romulon captain is like "do you know how many loving family members i lost in the war? you are scum and your stupid gay federation for idiots is going to fall because of this"

and then we get to have scenes where sisko is in a holding cell sitting there with the weight of the entire dominion war on his shoulders and he tries to justify his actions to picard or someone who, while deep down they agree it was the right choice so that DEMOCRACY WOULD WIN, have to hold him to task about it. PICARD WOULD PROBABLY PRETTY CONFLICTED AND THEN SISKO IS LIKE "WELL WE CAN'T ALL BE SAINTS... LOCUTUS."

and then it's basically a race against time to stop war from breaking out while at the same time seeing that justice is properly served and that sisko doesn't go before a kangaroo court on romulus. if you really want to go nuts, the enterprise-e takes sisko TO romulus after they stop off for his hearing on earth, and they have to defend him in a romulon court while at the same time trying to stop his assassination

call it 'star trek x: trial by fire' or something equally gay

there i just wrote some star trek fan fiction i hope you assholes are happy for making me do this

but but who's the villain and what planet-destroying machine does he have

Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat

qntm posted:

but but who's the villain and what planet-destroying machine does he have
darth vader, the death star

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
Slippery Tilde

SHAM BAM BAMINA posted:

darth vader, the death star

darth vader from the planet vulcan?

8ender
Sep 24, 2003

clown is watching you sleep

qntm posted:

but but who's the villain and what planet-destroying machine does he have

q puts picard on trial because he thinks picard is the villain and the fate of the entire human race is at stake!

toby
Dec 4, 2002

foundationfederation and empire

qntm
Jun 17, 2009

8ender posted:

q puts picard on trial because he thinks picard is the villain and the fate of the entire human race is at stake!

a next gen series plot in a tos movie world

Kirk
Sep 22, 2003

qntm posted:

but but who's the villain and what planet-destroying machine does he have

the villian is a romulon senator, vreenak's "wunderkind" son that quickly rose through the ranks of the senate after the death of his popular father. his planet destroying machine is the romulon empire and he wants to use it to burn the federation to the ground

oh sorry i guess that's not monster of the week enough

Kirk
Sep 22, 2003
"lol his son thats stupid kirk ur dumb" yeah well its a loving movie so s m d

Dr. Phildo
Dec 8, 2003

Except the heaven had come so near,
So seemed to choose my door,The distance would not haunt me so

Soiled Meat
I forget did tashas or ulna daughter die? Is she still kicking around? I know Denise is a bit puffy these days, but bring her back as the baddie and I'd watch

8ender
Sep 24, 2003

clown is watching you sleep
the ferengi are mad and built a big ugly brown planet fucker

but wait they usually just want profit why would they do this

oh lor convinced them to do it LOL

*saucer separation*

roll credits

Dr. Phildo
Dec 8, 2003

Except the heaven had come so near,
So seemed to choose my door,The distance would not haunt me so

Soiled Meat
Ulna? Thanks iphone. Romulan I mean :(

axolotl farmer
May 17, 2007

Now I'm going to sing the Perry Mason theme

stop calling them romulons :spergin:

Jonny 290
May 5, 2005



[ASK] me about OS/2 Warp
Romulan Paul 2016

sticky wizard
Nov 19, 2008

Dr. Phildo posted:

I forget did tashas or ulna daughter die? Is she still kicking around? I know Denise is a bit puffy these days, but bring her back as the baddie and I'd watch

oh man just looked her up on the gis and she looks exactly like my aunt now

Dr. Phildo
Dec 8, 2003

Except the heaven had come so near,
So seemed to choose my door,The distance would not haunt me so

Soiled Meat
She was in a windows commercial a little while back with a baby that cried at grappa through the magic of laptops or some bullshit.

8ender
Sep 24, 2003

clown is watching you sleep
what if in ancient times humans split into two groups and the federation is actually like the romulons vs vulcans

makes u think

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:

Dr. Phildo posted:

She was in a windows commercial a little while back with a baby that cried at grappa through the magic of laptops or some bullshit.

i saw an interview with de lancie whos like people walk up to me and think i got rich from q and i tell them i was a minor character on 7 episodes of a tv series in the 80s and 90s.

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:
and now he's doing a positive documentary on bronies

Dr. Phildo
Dec 8, 2003

Except the heaven had come so near,
So seemed to choose my door,The distance would not haunt me so

Soiled Meat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elhbjePbL7Y

I get it! She's still the romulan here and she is cooing over the new baby clone shinzon. The gramps in blue who doesn't look happy is the Vulcan uncle visiting for some reason.

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:
its romulan propaganda for the destruction of the human race

Stymie
Jan 9, 2001

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Al! posted:

its romulan propaganda for the destruction of the human race

romulon :eng101:

Kirk
Sep 22, 2003

Al! posted:

and now he's doing a positive documentary on bronies

i

ugh

ag


u

Kirk
Sep 22, 2003
i get that a nigga gotta make he dolla but jdl you went from breaking bad to bronies and that is shameful

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:

Kirk posted:

i get that a nigga gotta make he dolla but jdl you went from breaking bad to bronies and that is shameful

tbf he works on that show at least WHICH I ONLY KNOW because i looked at his imdb just now

Shaggar
Apr 26, 2006
iirc he did a voice on the show which isn't shameful cause its just making cartoons for girls, but then bronies happened

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
Slippery Tilde

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Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat
holiday special edition explosion, shameful.

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