BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

The Merry Marauder posted:

Well, I'd roll the dice on the corpses of Allie Reynolds and Eddie Lopat, or rookie Bob Grim. Pick two to send me, and the pick is yours.

How about Bob Grim Reaper and Johnny Sain in the Brain?

# ? Jan 17, 2013 19:16

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# ? May 18, 2024 13:52

The Merry Marauder: Apr 4, 2009; "But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."

Really, I am looking for another two failures to fail at my fifth rotation spot (aka the Fail Hole). Johnny Sain doesn't fly as a starter, even in a younger version.

# ? Jan 17, 2013 19:19

Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

The Merry Marauder posted:

Really, I am looking for another two failures to fail at my fifth rotation spot (aka the Fail Hole). Johnny Sain doesn't fly as a starter, even in a younger version.

Hrm, true. And since I'll probably look for more SP help in the next draft, there's no way this could bite me in the rear end.

Done (Lopat and Grim for draft pick).

With the draft pick I'll take '02 Chad Bradford, because he fits my need for (1) former White Sox and (2) submariners. Oh and (3) competent relievers.

# ? Jan 17, 2013 19:30

Monicro: Oct 21, 2010; And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Billy Williams (OF) (Now Monicro feels even sadder) - 17 days
Addie Joss (SP) (Why must Monicro feel sad?) - Out for Season

ahahahahahaha

Put Lefty O'Doul in for Billy. Put Hands in the rotation and just roll with a small bullpen for a week because gently caress it.

Re: Addie Joss offers

It's not as if I have anything to lose, so make me an offer here or the IRC.

# ? Jan 17, 2013 20:05

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

Monicro posted:

Re: Addie Joss offers

It's not as if I have anything to lose, so make me an offer here or the IRC.

How about :

2011 Adrian Gonzalez
2005 Roy Oswalt
2005 Roger Clemens

for

1902 Addie Joss
1975 Dwight Evans

# ? Jan 17, 2013 20:18

Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

Pander posted:

With the draft pick I'll take '02 Chad Bradford, because he fits my need for (1) former White Sox and (2) submariners. Oh and (3) competent relievers.

Oh, forgot to ask, when/how can I access Bradford since he's not on my 30-man? Can I just discharge a player back to the feeders (if so: send down Andy Carey to make room for Bradford)

I'd like my bullpen to be...

CL Jon Rauch 04 Expos
SU Chad Cordero 04 Expos
SR Luis Ayala 04 Expos
SR Chad Bradford 02 As
MR Scott Downs 04 Expos
LR Lou Warneke 42 Cards

# ? Jan 17, 2013 20:43

ForeverBWFC: Oct 19, 2011; Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

Monicro posted:

It's not as if I have anything to lose, so make me an offer here or the IRC.

What are you looking for sir?

# ? Jan 17, 2013 21:53

CraigK: Nov 4, 2008; by exmarx

updated

CraigK fucked around with this message at 23:57 on Jan 19, 2013

# ? Jan 17, 2013 22:09

Grinnblade: Sep 24, 2007

Expansion Cup VIII May

East Canton Press-News posted:

CATASTROPHES SHUT OUT BY BEARD LEAGUERS, EXPANSION CUP COMMISSAR IMPLICATED IN SCREWJOB

Canton, OH - It was a tale of two teams: entering today's game, the RVA Beard Leaguers were 7 and 23, riding an 8-game losing streak to the cellar of the McQueen League Larkin Division. The Canton Catastrophes were riding strong, building a 3-game winning streak on the back of taking 2 of 4 from division rival Idaho and the first game against the Leaguers enroute to a 16-14 record and battling for control of the Larkin Division.

So what went wrong? Why did the Catastrophes fall, 3-0, to the Beard Leaguers?

It couldn't have been that the Leaguers starting pitcher, 33-year-old Dennis Martinez, pitched a 4-hit complete game shut-out where as the hometown Catastrophes 40-year-old Dennis Martinez took the same amount of pitches to get through 6 innings of baseball in which he gave up a two-run home run to Darryl loving Spencer, could it?

No, Catastrophes owner Monathin had a better theory: "It doesn't take a genius to figure out that (Expansion Cup Commissar and owner of the Idaho Potatoes) Grinnblade is loving fixing everything so his own team wins the Cup. I mean come on, a team of dregs leading the division after a month? Nearly every team EXCEPT his getting injuries of some form or another over the first month? His team beating the poo poo out of ours and then throwing us to the Beard Leaguers to get embarrassed at home? WAKE UP SHEEPLE!"

When a reporter pointed out that the Catastrophes had actually split the series with the Potatoes and were riding a 3-game win streak before today's game, Monathin screamed out "DON'T EVER APPLY LOGIC TO MY ACTIONS, IT ONLY SCREWS ME UP FURTHER!" before storming out of the press conference. RVA owner dubsteppin refused to believe his team had actually won, and refused comment after the game citing a need to tend to his "magnificent" beard.

Expansion Cup Commissar Grinnblade, asked for comment on Monathin's statement coming off a 4-2 loss to the Harvard Elites, had this to say: "We in the office of the Commissar take accusations of corruption seriously, and have already determined that Monathin is mistaken in his assessment. There will be no further comment on this matter unless further evidence is presented." He then ended the conference and went into his office, where one reporter swore he could hear laughter of a "hysterical" nature.

Chicago Sun-Times posted:

LOSERS LOSE ON MILLION DOLLAR MAN'S "LUCKY" WALK-OFF HR

Chicago, IL - Another day, another Losers loss. Or... is it?

Entering the top of the tenth inning, eyebrows rose when a fan somehow got into the Losers' bullpen and had a brief conversation with Losers reliever Troy Percival, set to take the mound for the Losers as extra innings began with them tied with the Million Dollar Men, 4-4. Security managed to pry the fan away, and Percival did not look perturbed by the proceedings at all, instead silently walking out to the mound to begin the 10th against the Dollar Men's third baseman Frank Baker. Million Dollar Men owner CVE was seen smiling as the pitch left Percival's hands and Baker swung with a force that screamed "home run".... as the pitch sailed over his head.

As the hometown crowd laughed at the folly, CVE was far less amused, standing bolt upright, gripping the railing of his luxury seating, and screaming down at the field. Percival looked up towards the box, and something in his demeanor seemed to calm CVE, who returned to his seat as Percival threw a ball that missed slightly, bringing the count to 1-1.

And then finally, it happened. Troy Percival threw an absolute meatball of a change-up, right down the middle, and Baker's eyes lit up as he absolutely launched it into the seats in left-center. Percival's face stayed stone-still as Baker rounded the bases, and he then turned to shut down the Men in short order and send it to the bottom of the 10th. However, the morale of the Losers was shot, and Cecil Upshaw mopped them up to give the Million Dollar Men the 10-inning 5-4 win.

When asked for comment after the game, Percival only said "Even the best make mistakes sometimes. I guess I let that fan get into my head a bit too much, and I paid the price for it." As he turned to place his shoes in his locker, a slight crinkling was heard coming from his pockets.

Million Dollar Men owner CVE called a press conference afterwards, in which he said "This only goes to prove... EVERYBODY has a price for the Million Dollar Man! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Stats and Analysis

Analysis

Well, at least Fergie won't be out long, eh?

Analysis

Eurgh. Well, at least you'll have a decent shot at some good pitching in the draft, huh?

Analysis

Bob Buhl ain't doin' so hot. But the rest of your team is certainly making up for it.

Analysis

Bwahaha. _{Er... I mean...} Tough break, but at least they won't be out long, right? Also the batting situation has not improved and you may want to consider changes sooner rather than later.

Analysis

Rudy York's lack of batting is about the only negative I see for this team as-is.

Analysis

Welp. Doug Drabek is having a rough go at it, but with Walk exploded there's not much you can do except make a deal or hope for an upswing.

Analysis

I'm probably going to have to do something about how tired my lineup is. What that is remains to be seen, however.

Analysis

Yeah, you're jobbing, but it's more due to being in a division with the two highest-win teams in the entire Cup than anything wrong with your roster, in my opinion.

Analysis

Paul Gillepsie may not be the best option.

Analysis

Hey! A-Rod is picking back up! And you're leading the division by half a game! There's still hope.... okay yeah that rotation is going to be ghastly until the Big Unit comes back.

Analysis

Injuries aside, you're doing pretty okay for yourselves. I have no idea how Pat Kelly made his way into your lineup but from the looks of it it occured after the month was over since he hasn't played a game yet.

Analysis

Maybe three days off is what Lee needs to clear his head. We'll see, though.

Analysis

You forgot to do something about A-Rod, so I have no idea who Mogul has been playing in his place. He'll be back three days into June though, so it's probably nothing to worry about at this juncture.

Analysis

Chan-Ho Park getting injured is probably the best thing that's happened to your rotation.

Analysis

The good news: you won 2 more games than you did last month! The bad news: You also played two more games than you did last month, and also your pitching staff is still a dumpster fire.

Analysis

Bad pitching and a few of your hitters are severely underperforming. Yikes.

Analysis

Second month, same as the first. Awesome pitching, Encarnacion still hitting below Mendoza line.

Analysis

Getting your poo poo pushed in by the Beard Leaguers seems to have made something snap. :staredog:

(Although you may want to consider keeping Reggie Jackson under closer observation.)

Division Standings

# ? Jan 17, 2013 23:00

Bograt: Nov 4, 2009; MagNIFicent

Drop Kal Daniels to the Minors. Bring up Garry Templeton and swap him in for Rich Aurilia to give the poor boy some rest.

Start injecting Encarnacion with "supplements" (read: HGH). Or possibly replace him with a broomstick scarecrow. Whichever seems like the better option.

Seriously, though, anyone got a decent 3B they'd be willing to let go of? This guy is killing me.

# ? Jan 17, 2013 23:22

Monathin: Sep 1, 2011; ?????????
?

YOU HAD ONE JOB, DENNY. ONE JOB.

Just my luck, one of the best slugging lineups the Indians ever had and half of them can't hit the ball. :cripes:

Kal Daniels to the Bench, Old Man Steady Eddie in his place as DH. Steady Eddie's ~~probably~~ definitely going to fall apart on me, but he's the best option I got since Kal has decided hitting the ball isn't an option.

My catchers appear bound and determined to murder me. Sims to the Minors, Larry McLean in his place. Alomar still personally catches for El Tiante, since he isn't doing any drat better.

For more experimentation: Baby Brian Giles to Platoon with Albert Belle. Belle against Lefties, Giles against Righties.

Finally, a rearranging of the batting order to commend those who aren't tanking.

code:

CANTON CATASTROPHES STARTING LINEUP
#1 - CF Kenny Lofton
#2 - SS Barry Larkin
#3 - 1B Jim Thome
#4 - RF Manny Ramirez
#5 - LF Brian Giles(Versus RHP)/LF Albert Belle(Versus LHP)
#6 - 2B Verne Fuller*
#7 - C Larry McLean
#8 - DH Eddie Murray
#9 - 3B Hans Lobert

* - Verne Fuller plays until Carlos is healthy, however, instead of removing him from the lineup when Baerga is back as in my previous post, platoon him with Baerga. Baerga against RHP, Fuller against LHP.

Monathin fucked around with this message at 23:50 on Jan 17, 2013

# ? Jan 17, 2013 23:43

ForeverBWFC: Oct 19, 2011; Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

Bograt posted:

Drop Kal Daniels to the Minors. Bring up Garry Templeton and swap him in for Rich Aurilia to give the poor boy some rest.

Start injecting Encarnacion with "supplements" (read: HGH). Or possibly replace him with a broomstick scarecrow. Whichever seems like the better option.

Seriously, though, anyone got a decent 3B they'd be willing to let go of? This guy is killing me.

I have a nostalgic soft spot for Dave Righetti, so I'm prepared to offer both '85 HoJo and new recruit '79 Sparky Lyle as compensation...

# ? Jan 17, 2013 23:44

Ginge: Sep 8, 2011; Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!

I see Del Pratt is still batting .350 somehow. This team confuses me, but I'll take it so far. Anyway, the only roster change this month is to have Jacobson take over full time at RF for now.

Anyone looking for a 2B? I'm putting Eddie Collins on the block. He's getting on a bit now, but he'll still be really good as long as you give him regular rest.

# ? Jan 17, 2013 23:55

Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

In those Division Standings, is that "Overall On-Base Average" and """ Slugging "" or is it OPPONENTS?

I'm really hoping it's the former and not the latter. Kinda doubt that though :ohdear:

Outside of Musial and Slaughter needing more HRs, I'm pretty happy with my hitters right now. They're the only reason I'm treading water right now...even after-thoughts like Vidro and Johnson are hefting some decent OBAs.

Not sure what to do with Woodling getting destroyed. Both him and Hopp have been dismal in limited sample sizes. And Jesus, what happened to Walker Cooper? Dude is turning into a monster out of nowhere. I should probably have the best catching platoon in the league...

Luis Ayala to Middle Relief
Cory Stieb to the Minors
Lon Warneke to Short Relief

(*If I can somehow get Chad Bradford on my active roster, put him in Setup, Move Cordero to Middle Relief, Warneke to Short Relief, Ayala to the minors, and cut Steib back to the feeders. I don't think I can do that, though I can't remember where I read about it in the thread.)

# ? Jan 18, 2013 00:09

The Merry Marauder: Apr 4, 2009; "But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."

Pander posted:

(*If I can somehow get Chad Bradford on my active roster, put him in Setup, Move Cordero to Middle Relief, Warneke to Short Relief, Ayala to the minors, and cut Steib back to the feeders. I don't think I can do that, though I can't remember where I read about it in the thread.)

Any players you add during the EC do not require a roster move (except to make room in the majors, of course). After the three-round (possibly four) Dispersal Draft, you will have to cut back down to 30.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 00:13

Archie Goodwin: Jan 2, 2012; Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.

Bograt posted:

Seriously, though, anyone got a decent 3B they'd be willing to let go of? This guy is killing me.

I can give you '95 Chipper Jones for a package from your feeders: '87 Willie Randolph, '90 Jay Howell, and '87 Tewksbury?

# ? Jan 18, 2013 00:30

GrickleGrass: Dec 18, 2011; I speak for the trees.

Swap Adam Jones with Rickey Henderson, like I asked last month. If Ventura and Reynolds are still platooning, then put an end to that as well-- keeping Ventura in against both LHP and RHP.

Also, it doesn't seem like Dotel and Britton are filling in for Johnson and Leiter. Who is pitching for them? I hope the three healthy pitchers aren't dividing all of the work between them. If that's the case, at least swap out Leiter for Dotel since he'll be gone all season.

Make my rotation:
SP Johnson
SP Brown
SP Rogers
SP Ryan
SP Dotel

And unless injuries occur I won't ask you to do any further work, so don't worry.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 00:40

Monicro: Oct 21, 2010; And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

ForeverBWFC posted:

What are you looking for sir?

Literally anything except a RF or 2B

# ? Jan 18, 2013 00:45

ForeverBWFC: Oct 19, 2011; Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

Monicro posted:

Literally anything except a RF or 2B

How about Dave Smith for a decent Middle Reliever, Kirk Gibson for good outfield cover, and Burleigh Grimes for an acceptable Starting Pitcher?

# ? Jan 18, 2013 01:04

Monicro: Oct 21, 2010; And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

ForeverBWFC posted:

How about Dave Smith for a decent Middle Reliever, Kirk Gibson for good outfield cover, and Burleigh Grimes for an acceptable Starting Pitcher?

Hmm. What year is that Grimes?

# ? Jan 18, 2013 01:10

CVE: Jan 27, 2012

Let's have Les Nunamaker be the catcher for a month in order for Downing to regenerate himself.

In addition platoon Frank Chance and Andre Thornton at 1B with Thornton starting to get rid of fatigue.

Urban Shocker moves to 5th starter for Jake Weimar and Jack Taylor moves to 4th starter.

Joe Tinker will have to return to SS due to Bobby WAllaces injury.

Goose Gossage is going to be my closer despite his lack of wins and Cecil Upshaw becomes the Setup in his stead.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 01:47

ScottyJSno: Aug 16, 2010; 日本が大好きです！

Why on earth are my starters loseing so many games? I have Two good ones and every one else is 1 - 8 or so.

Pitching
Lackey is not looking to good.
So move Lackey to the Long Relief and Oritz to 5th Starting spot.

Lineup
I want the first week of June to have this line up.

1. Eckstein - SS
2. Cavarretta - LF
3. Pafko - CF
4. Dawson - RF
5. Salmon - 1B
6. Hack - 3B
7. Kennedy - 2B
8. Molina - C (5 on 1 for :bang:

Gillespie)
9. Glaus DH (if needed)

The rest of June will go like this.
1. Grace - 1B
2. Cavarretta - LF
3. Pafko - CF
4. Glaus -3B
5. Sandburg - 2B
6. Dawson -RF
7. Dunston -SS
8. Molina - C ( 5 on 1 for Gill-I don't know what a bat is-espie)
9. Salmon - DH (as needed.)

# ? Jan 18, 2013 02:10

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

Alrighty. Put Pete Fox in CF. Move Orlando Cepeda to LF, Hank Greenberg to RF for now. Jim Ray Hart to 3B to spell Harvey Kuenn. Leave the batting order as is, with those defensive switches.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 02:17

Pete Ladd: Mar 9, 2012

Hey, Grinnblade, you know you can change the number of pitchers/position players on the roster? I ask because I don't think people want the seven-man bullpen; I certainly don't - and having a short bench without a DH isn't much fun either.

Taking that into consideration, and with the need to get some rest days for my guys:

CF Suzuki
LF Singleton
RF Jackson
C Piazza
1B Olerud
SS Tulo/Belanger
2B Grich/Cuddyer
3B DeCinces/Robinson

Bench:
C Hernandez
RF Mondesi
OF Gonzalez

Switch Cargo to the DH duties.

SP Holtzman
SP Nomo
SP D. Martinez
SP Garcia
SP Chacin

CL T. Martinez
SU Putz
SR Brothers
SR Osuna
MR Moyer
LR Garcia

Thanks.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 02:52

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Super-League VIII, Smasher League Week 16: Fun is not allowed

Games of the Week

Don May posted:

LANDERS BLANK FAILURES 3-0, MRNOUN PONDERS SUPER-LEAGUE FUTURE

Moonbase 0-2- The outcome was practically predestined, but that wasn't the big story of the day.

No, with the powerful Landers taking on the failing Failures, the only surprising thing was how close the final score was. Still, the Landers picked up another win, which led to yet another mrnoun monologue. mrnoun, owner of the Landers, had picked "Sudden Death" in the Super-Draft recently, creating a crisis in the Super-League, as the sketchy rules regarding this occurrence were uncertain to say that least. Many had assumed that the Landers were disbanded the moment they chose death, and that there players were subject to Super-Auction. Others believed that the choice of "sudden death" was more a statement of principles, indicating that the Landers had lost their faith in the Super-League, and that mrnoun would be willing to sell his best players. For his part, Commissar Smasher Dynamo seemed to be in a state of denial, pretending as though nothing was wrong.

After the game today, mrnoun made his first public comments since the drafting of that bitter draught that doth quench men's thirst fore'er. "You pitiful simpletons." mrnoun began, making sure the audience could tell of his contempt for them by tone alone, "You really don't understand anything, do you? You are like the Sex Pistols to my Yes. Oh, you may be more popular, more well known, more adored by the 16 year-old trust fund baby who wants to show how "real" he is, but like Sid Vicious, you are all just talentless hacks who rely on a sense of 'style' to fool people into thinking you're memorable." mrnoun's face grew even darker.

"And Smasher Dynamo is the worst of all of you. Not just because his Super-League is creatively stagnant, but because he condones your idiocies. He lets Bruzer back into the league, he let the corporation teams almost ruin the league, and the pandering. My god, the pandering. Smasher can't possibly think the last few seasons of the Super-League have been good, but he's just so desperate for any sort of validation that he's willing to mortgage his soul to get it. Well, I say no more! There needs to be a change...and there will be one." Asked what he meant by that, mrnoun simply noted that, "Seasons don't fear the reaper, nor do the wind, the sun or the mrnoun. Can Smasher Dynamo be like they are? Or does he fear the reaper? Soon, we will know."

Over in the Failures' locker room, mentholmoose was more focused on his own miseries, "Okay, what the gently caress just happened here? loving Josh Beckett only allowed one loving run and we still loving lose? I don't know what the gently caress else I can do to these cocksuckers. I'm already making them live in Philadelphia! That's the worst thing you can do anybody! Man, gently caress my players. Also, gently caress Chip Kelly. Like a guy named 'Chip' is going to be anything other than a cocksucker. I hate my team."

GAME NOTES

-The Failures managed two hits on the game, both of them coming from Rickey Henderson. Astounding.

Box Score

Don May posted:

WHALERS GET AN 'F' IN MATHS, LOSE 4-3

Milton Keynes- The motto of the Mathematicians should probably be "in the long run, we're all dead." Because, in the end, John Maynard Keynes and Milton Keynes sound a lot alike, even though historians stress there is no such connection, even giving a 45 minute lecture to that effect before the game.

Asked for what the history of Milton Keynes was then, they explained that it was a 'new town'. This, of course, created some confusion amongst the mostly-American audience, and the historians clarified the term, explaining that it was a community built in the post-World War II era United Kingdom in order to relieve urban congestion. This finally made sense to the Americans, who now understood the town as the British version of a soulless suburb that slowly destroys the spirit of all who enter. Increasingly exasperated, the historians agreed that this was basically right.

Still, that didn't stop the Mathematicians from winning a close 4-3 victory, powered by an Al Oliver home run in the bottom of the eighth from which the Whalers could not recover. mks5000, who is either the owner of the Whalers, or a madman who has disguised himself as the team's rightful owner until such a day as the true heir to the Whalers returns to mount the Cetacean Throne, and takes up the Harpoon of Ron Francis...and, on that day, he shall bring glory back to Hartford, and the world will tremble in his wake.

But, for the time being, mks5000 is in charge, and he gave his usual luke-warm post-game press conference, "I think my Reggie Jackson is broken. Where can I get a new one? Is there like a form I can fill out...or some sort of body shop where they can fix him? I mean, I don't want to be 'that guy', but I think Hartford deserves a bit better than this. Not a lot better, but a bit better."

GAME NOTES

-gently caress it. There's nothing interesting about Hartford. Ever. gently caress knows I tried.

-Unless Hartford was really controlled by robots.

-Then again, if robots controlled Hartford, it probably would be a lot cooler, with giant spires and huge solar panels covering most of the former residential districts.

-So, in summary, Hartford has not been overrun by robots, but, for the good of everyone, we should probably all work towards making that happen.

Box Score

Television Title Defenses of the Television Title

: Okay, the Biosparks still have the Television Title and they'll take on the Barons. Biosparks win Game 1, and that's a good start for them.

: Smasher, wait, this is important, the owner of the Barons is the guy with Sisko in his avatar, right?

: He is. And his Barons will win Game 2 as the Biosparks' bullpen, which is awful, continues to be awful at the worst times for them. Anyway, where are you going with this?

: Smasher, I need you to explain Star Trek: Voyager to me. It's important.

: Well, Sisko wasn't on that show, although the Barons will muscle their way past the Biosparks for the TV Title.

: I know, but I just have to know...how did a show that mediocre, and seemingly expensive, last for seven years?

: Ah, that is a good question, and the Barons beat the Cultists in the first game of their series. Anyway, in the mid-90s, things were different, and rogue entertainment officials still had the mad dream that they, much like Fox Studios, could build their own broadcast channel.

: Okay...

: Barons win again, and the Cultists won't be winning the TV Title this week. Anyway, Voyager was the tentpole of the UPN network.

: Really? But it doesn't seem like the sort of show that-

: You seem to forget that this was the network that launched Shasta McNasty.

: Cultists avoid the sweep, which doesn't get them anything but a win. Anyway, so, because UPN was such a moribund network, only Star Trek and the WWF kept it alive for more than a few years...and that is why the Rock guest-starred in an episode in one of the later seasons. But that...that's another story.

: I don't think I learned anything today.

: Next week, Barons-Mashers and then Barons-Phoenixes or Mashers-Failures. That should be...the Phoenixes are going to snuff out the Barons' playoff chances next week, aren't they?

Team Standings

Analysis

You need to win the series against the Phoenixes next week. Don't rest starters, just win. You need this series. Don't let yourselves down.

Analysis

Stras is doing well. That's...something.

Analysis

Ned Garver was clearly a plot by the capitalist Americans to destabilize the revolution!

Analysis

Whether or not the Phoenixes winning the Mark Bellhorn Division is good for the league, and it probably isn't, they've withstood the best EC teams I could throw at them once again. Back to the drawing board, I suppose.

Analysis

Not a bad team, just with a couple of huge holes.

Analysis

I always knew the Gumshoes could be good given a chance.

Analysis

What will become of the Luna Landers?

Analysis

Williams! Mantle! Clemens! And it goes downhill really fast from there.

Analysis

My god, they're getting more powerful by the game!

Analysis

That offense just needs some help. I'm not exactly sure where they'll get it, though.

Analysis

Having a not-terrible month! The greatest thing ever to happen to them!

Analysis

I should have buried them deeper.

Analysis

I just have no idea about this team. They're up, they're down, they're up again. I just don't know.

Analysis

Well, maybe the fourth time will be the charm.

Analysis

See you in the playoffs, assuming you don't kill your team with weird trades first.

Analysis

I'm very sorry.

Standings and Leaders

# ? Jan 18, 2013 03:00

Cthulhu Dreams: Dec 11, 2010; If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

Put Hornsby back in at 2B vs Righties, DH vs lefties. Sandberg plays 2B vs Lefties, Musial plays DH vs Righties.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 03:46

gardenald: Jul 23, 2007; In the end, it comes down to throwing one pitch after another, and seeing what happens. With each new consequence, the game begins to take shape.

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Television Title Defenses of the Television Title

: Okay, the Biosparks still have the Television Title and they'll take on the Barons. Biosparks win Game 1, and that's a good start for them.
: Smasher, wait, this is important, the owner of the Barons is the guy with Sisko in his avatar, right?

: He is. And his Barons will win Game 2 as the Biosparks' bullpen, which is awful, continues to be awful at the worst times for them. Anyway, where are you going with this?
: Smasher, I need you to explain Star Trek: Voyager to me. It's important.

: Well, Sisko wasn't on that show, although the Barons will muscle their way past the Biosparks for the TV Title.
: I know, but I just have to know...how did a show that mediocre, and seemingly expensive, last for seven years?

: Ah, that is a good question, and the Barons beat the Cultists in the first game of their series. Anyway, in the mid-90s, things were different, and rogue entertainment officials still had the mad dream that they, much like Fox Studios, could build their own broadcast channel.
: Okay...

: Barons win again, and the Cultists won't be winning the TV Title this week. Anyway, Voyager was the tentpole of the UPN network.
: Really? But it doesn't seem like the sort of show that-
: You seem to forget that this was the network that launched Shasta McNasty.

: Cultists avoid the sweep, which doesn't get them anything but a win. Anyway, so, because UPN was such a moribund network, only Star Trek and the WWF kept it alive for more than a few years...and that is why the Rock guest-starred in an episode in one of the later seasons. But that...that's another story.
: I don't think I learned anything today.

: Next week, Barons-Mashers and then Barons-Phoenixes or Mashers-Failures. That should be...the Phoenixes are going to snuff out the Barons' playoff chances next week, aren't they?

Here's the thing that kills me about Voyager. With that premise, it COULD have been a good show. They had a ready-to-go vehicle for conflict and drama with the Starfleet and Maquis crew forced to work together. They were stranded in the middle of nowhere with limited supplies, and if they had any sort of continuity at all it could've been great. But instead we got seven years of Neelix and "there's coffee in that nebula". God, gently caress Voyager.

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Analysis

You need to win the series against the Phoenixes next week. Don't rest starters, just win. You need this series. Don't let yourselves down.

Oh yeah. Lineups for next week:
Vs RHP
SS Honus Wagner
RF Enos Slaughter
LF Stan Musial
1B Prince Fielder
DH Jim Rice
CF Fred Lynn
3B Brooks Robinson
C Carlton Fisk
2B Red Schoendienst

Vs LHP
SS Honus Wagner
CF Fred Lynn
LF Stan Musial
1B Prince Fielder
DH Jim Rice
RF Dwight Evans
3B Brooks Robinson
C Carlton Fisk
2B Red Schoendienst

No rotation/bullpen changes this week.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 05:07

The Merry Marauder: Apr 4, 2009; "But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."

Well, at least I'll miss the apparently superhuman Josh Johnson.

Try resting Lou's Iron Horse over at DH with Papi at first. Chet Lemon in right over Beltran.

Give me Ed Roebuck over the husk of Alan Embree, I guess. Thanks.

How did Bob Grim or Eddie Lopat roll out?

# ? Jan 18, 2013 05:15

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

gardenald posted:

Here's the thing that kills me about Voyager. With that premise, it COULD have been a good show. They had a ready-to-go vehicle for conflict and drama with the Starfleet and Maquis crew forced to work together. They were stranded in the middle of nowhere with limited supplies, and if they had any sort of continuity at all it could've been great. But instead we got seven years of Neelix and "there's coffee in that nebula". God, gently caress Voyager.

Dude, it was never going to be good. The leader of the Maquis was loving Chakotay. Now, since I'm betting some of you have never seen Voyager, this was Chakotay:

Anyway, this dude was a Native American, and that meant that like 75% of the episodes with him as the main character involved some variation of the phrase, "Captain, I must go on a vision quest!"

# ? Jan 18, 2013 05:23

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

The Merry Marauder posted:

How did Bob Grim or Eddie Lopat roll out?

You should use either. Ever. Under any circumstance.

But, deep down, you already knew that.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 05:25

The Merry Marauder: Apr 4, 2009; "But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."

We can but dream of the stars, here in our mediocre division-leading gutter.

I don't know, Lopat had a lot of black ink in '53 and Grim was RotY, so it was worth a shot. Perhaps someone else would like to take a chance!

# ? Jan 18, 2013 05:27

theacox: Jun 8, 2010; You can't be serious.

.
..
...

Lew Burdette to closer
Ernie Johnson to setup
Don Liddle to #5 starter
Bob Buhl to the middle relief
Dutch Ruether up to short relief
If we can somehow make Bob Shawkey into a bloody pumpkin, I would like it.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 05:30

ForeverBWFC: Oct 19, 2011; Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

Monicro posted:

Hmm. What year is that Grimes?

Edit: '24

ForeverBWFC fucked around with this message at 09:31 on Jan 18, 2013

# ? Jan 18, 2013 08:47

Paul Zuvella: Dec 7, 2011

I have absolutely no idea what to do about Reggie Jackson or my RF situation. If anyone is selling a RFer and thinks we can make a deal then let me know. I'm also going to ignore Boggs 5 point ratings drop and just stay the course.

And Killebrew is sore? Uhg. I just want to be .500 :smith:

RHP

2B Collins
DH Boggs
RF Jackson
CF Murcer
1B Schmidt
LF Simmons
C Posada
SS Jeter
3B Smith

LHP

2B Collins
DH Boggs
3B Schmidt
1B Killebrew
LF Simmons
RF Wells
CF Maddox
C Davis
SS Jeter

Paul Zuvella fucked around with this message at 15:40 on Jan 18, 2013

# ? Jan 18, 2013 15:37

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

Eight games under my pythag record. Wow.

Call up Todd Worrell, send down Lee Smith, and put Worrell in Smith's spot.

mks5000 posted:

Uhg. I just want to be .500

You and me both. :smith:

# ? Jan 18, 2013 16:16

Archie Goodwin: Jan 2, 2012; Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.

I'd like Grich to come back in for Schmidt, please.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 18:14

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

We need to get to a new page, so make that happen, guys.

Smasher League Week 17 Injury Report

Cuba Smokers
Ned Garver (SP) (Mercy) - 9 days

New England Arguments
Jim Piersall (OF) (Fear draws a walk) - Out for Season

Ryleh Cultists
Pedro Martinez (SP) (Why won't the Cultists die?) - 12 days
Mel Ott (OF) (Still technically on your team) - 7 days

Saturn Biosparks
Fred Luderus (1B) (More like Fred 'Ludicrous', am I right? But seriously, he separated his shoulder) - 12 days

South Bolton Eazy W
Jose Cruz (OF) (Did you really think Moseby was going to sit by and watch as you replaced him?) - 24 days

# ? Jan 18, 2013 18:43

blakelmenakle: Sep 1, 2007; AHEM! There's sand on my boots!

Send down Luderus, call up Avila. Slide Kress over to 1B and bring Rosen back in to 3B. Slide Goose up to the 2 hole and Rosen into cleanup.

Lineup
1.) SS: Ramirez
2.) LF: Gossage
3.) DH: Ruth
4.) 3B: Rosen
5.) RF: Cravath
6.) CF: Lynn
7.) 1B: Kress
8.) C: Ferrell
9.) 2B: Fox

# ? Jan 18, 2013 19:08

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

kw0134, I have a :siren:

trade proposal :siren:

for you:

2005 Roger Clemens
2005 Roy Oswalt

for

1998 Kevin Brown
1986 Rick Reuschel

Let me know if you're interested.

# ? Jan 18, 2013 19:21

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 18, 2024 13:52

Ginge: Sep 8, 2011; Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!

A (very small) trade!

Walney Rakers receive:

Mules' third round dispersal draft pick

Tijuana Mules recieve:

'82 Buddy Bell

# ? Jan 18, 2013 22:18

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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