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Lot 49 posted:I read one of these where someone goes into a sandwich shop and orders a whole bunch of random and esoteric fillings that no regular sandwich shop would ever stock. When they get told the shop doesn't have those ingredients the customer has a meltdown and threatens the sandwich shop worker. But it's okay because the worker is an expert martial artist. And I think it's being told by another worker who is also an expert martial artist. Yeah, it was this thread: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3501091&pagenumber=41&perpage=40#post408966229 My favorite part is that a sandwich with all of those ingredients would probably be loving disgusting. "Give me a sandwich with all your most expensive toppings and I don't care how well any of them go together! "
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:20 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2024 22:44 |
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Lot 49 posted:I read one of these where someone goes into a sandwich shop and orders a whole bunch of random and esoteric fillings that no regular sandwich shop would ever stock. When they get told the shop doesn't have those ingredients the customer has a meltdown and threatens the sandwich shop worker. But it's okay because the worker is an expert martial artist. And I think it's being told by another worker who is also an expert martial artist. It's in here somewhere. I remember the counter lady apologizing that the only thing on the list they actually had was shrimp, of all things. Avocado? Ham? What kind of fancy joint do you think this is? e,fb
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:21 |
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Flights From Hell posted:I was on a flight from London Heathrow to JFK in cattle class seats with the surliest bunch of flight attendants it has been my dspleasure to experience. I travel frequently in many parts of the globe, know what a difficult job they can have, and do my best to be a good passenger for them, but this crew had chips on both shoulders. So much sass!
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:22 |
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hate pants posted:Siiiiiiiigh. Two things. 1) that is the absolute most annoying customer in the world and 2) never use the word agape. What if you're talking about the ancient Greek concept of brotherly love?
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:24 |
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You get the impression that he made up the entire story to try and bully AA into giving him free poo poo and they saw right through it.
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:24 |
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bringmyfishback posted:So much sass! I like the part where he threatens the attendant with his undivided attention, like he's a tax inspector or, more likely, an absolute murderer.
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:27 |
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WeaponGradeSadness posted:Yeah, it was this thread: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3501091&pagenumber=41&perpage=40#post408966229 My favorite part is that the sandwich shop has shrimp, but no ham.
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:28 |
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General Panic posted:I don't think the person who wrote that actually has much knowledge of cheese that isn't pre-sliced. Yeah but who does? If he just wrote the name of some expensive cheese I'd have no idea what he was talking about.
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:32 |
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Sorry to post again so soon, but I just read this Flights From Hell posted:Last year I took Royal Jordanian from Bangkok to Amman and back with a group of my friends. Now, I’ve taken a lot of flights that had issues, but this may genuinely have been the worst one I’ve ever taken. I was on a connecting flight from Singapore and had a 6 hour layover. Not the greatest thing in the world since Suvarnabhumi Airport is kind of tacky, but tolerable. The real problem began in the air. Only two stewardesses spoke English, and even they barely spoke it. Our plane waited for two hours on the ground with no explanation whatsoever given. The stewardesses refused to let anyone go to the bathroom.
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:47 |
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I will literally walk and swim to my destination before flying Royal Jordanian again. On the return flight,
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 20:54 |
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WeaponGradeSadness posted:Yeah, it was this thread: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3501091&pagenumber=41&perpage=40#post408966229 Yes! Thank you. It's even better than I remembered: Customer: “Oh yeah? And who the f*** are you? Another a**hole who’s going to refuse me my food?” Me: “I was thinking more a black sash in Lethwei, a competitor in both Eskrima and Sambo, and if you’re familiar with the local circuit I’m the latest MMA champion. And yes, I’m refusing your food.”
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 21:04 |
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bringmyfishback posted:Sorry to post again so soon, but I just read this Those stewardesses seem to do a lot of berating and making arbitrary demands despite their lack of english skills, despite it being to my knowledge rather widely spoken in Jordan, does the author speak Arabic?
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 21:35 |
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jalopybrown posted:Those stewardesses seem to do a lot of berating and making arbitrary demands despite their lack of english skills, despite it being to my knowledge rather widely spoken in Jordan, does the author speak Arabic? Maybe he was using a "Jew trick".
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 22:31 |
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bringmyfishback posted:Sorry to post again so soon, but I just read this STDH translation: so basically this guy was dissatisfied with his inflight meal and one of the stewardesses gave him a dirty look, maybe. Also he may or may not have a piss fetish.
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 22:35 |
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This morning, a friend from high school unironically posted the "And that student was Albert Einstein" story on Facebook constantIllusion posted:I love it when racists use "I lost this job/scholarship/college admission due to AFFIRMATIVE ACTION " as codespeak for "I blame minorities for the fact I wasn't qualified for this position."
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# ? Feb 14, 2013 23:19 |
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bringmyfishback posted:Sorry to post again so soon, but I just read this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxtEYFYd-MY
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 00:17 |
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GWBBQ posted:This morning, a friend from high school unironically posted the "And that student was Albert Einstein" story on Facebook Yea no one who gets angry about Affirmative Action knows what it is. They think it literally means the government says 'hey, hire black people, ONLY BLACK PEOPLE'. All it is is a safety net so that if some idiot is saying every black applicant is 'under qualified' while all the white ones magically are perfectly fine HR can go 'no this is obviously racist, stop that poo poo Bubba'.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 01:51 |
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From the Oscar Pistorius thread.redreader posted:When I was about 13, my Xhosa teacher shot someone who was stealing the wheels/tyres (can't remember) off his car. According to him, the man said "I am dying!" and his buddies dragged him into a van and they drove off. He called the cops, and the cops patted him on the back and congratulated him for helping keep the streets clean, or something. South Africa probably changed since I lived there though, that was 1992. And that teacher....
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 02:37 |
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Spoilers for Les Miserables. A screenshot from Tumblr, shared on Facebook, involving people shouting out in a movie theater. WhyIHateTheInternet.jpg
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 02:44 |
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cptn_dr posted:Spoilers for Les Miserables. It's an adaptation of a musical that's thirty years old which is itself an adaptation of a book that's over a hundred years old. Does it really qualify as spoilers? That is some poo poo that didn't happen, though.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 06:31 |
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WeaponGradeSadness posted:Yeah, it was this thread: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3501091&pagenumber=41&perpage=40#post408966229 "What the hell do you mean you don't have borneo boiled broccoli broth?"
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 10:50 |
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cptn_dr posted:Spoilers for Les Miserables. It's okay that you're not enough of a Whovian to realise Steven Moffat literally invented the concept of jumping off buildings.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 11:47 |
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quote:We were watching Troy and when the dudes came out of the wooden horse, a voice behind us shouted "I loving knew it!"
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 11:49 |
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After seeing that picture of the Marine outside the school, I got to wondering if there really were any laws against dressing up like a service member and Google turned up these gems from the officer.com forums:quote:I ask because last September 11th I was working at a Sprint call center. One of the employees there wore a uniform to work....everyday. Guy was about 22 years old, baby faced and skinny, spiked blonde hair...Basically looked like a college frat ****** bag. Well he wore a Army dress uniform, except it had a mix of Navy, Army, and even Air Force medals and ribbons. He also had conflicting ranks, like a Captains double bar, and a Sergeants chevrons. Nearly everyone knew the guy was a joke and a fraud, but he still wore it in hopes of impressing a girl, and stealing some honor. quote:A couple of weeks ago I was at the mall with my wife and she spotted a young PFC in his Dress Blue "Bravo" Uniform. "Awww, look, hes a cute little guy, remember when you were like that." I just gave her "the look".
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 11:59 |
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bringmyfishback posted:he found the stewardesses at the back of the plane, near the lavatory, eating the vegetarian meals! This is the best. This and ''HEY DEVIL.'' What does he even mean? You can't smoke if you're a marine?
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 16:10 |
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ravenkult posted:What does he even mean? You can't smoke if you're a marine? I was in the army and got out almost 15 years ago, so things might have changed since then, but there was never any regulation against smoking in uniform when I was in. Also, we called them "pants", not trousers. Maybe it is a Marine thing. We used the commands of "At Ease" or "Parade Rest" to go to the position of parade rest. I don't recall reading about the command of "Hey Devil" anywhere in FM 22-5.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 16:45 |
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SkunkDuster posted:After seeing that picture of the Marine outside the school, I got to wondering if there really were any laws against dressing up like a service member and Google turned up these gems from the officer.com forums: There was a thread quite awhile back about an Army Rangers forum, where all they talked about was kicking the poo poo out of every "Ranger Impostor" they could find. From the way the forum seemed, there are apparently tons of people that love to impersonate Army Rangers. But those guys found them every time. Each story ended with what amounted to felony levels of assault. Plus, the cops would always be ok with it, because they used to be Rangers too.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 16:50 |
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ravenkult posted:This is the best. This and ''HEY DEVIL.'' Don't know about the smoking, but "devil dog" is a nickname for a Marine.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 18:13 |
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ravenkult posted:This is the best. This and ''HEY DEVIL.'' If its the same as in the army then you aren't supposed to smoke and walk at the same time In uniform. Still is STDH.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 18:23 |
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RenegadeStyle1 posted:If its the same as in the army then you aren't supposed to smoke and walk at the same time In uniform.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 19:09 |
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RenegadeStyle1 posted:If its the same as in the army then you aren't supposed to smoke and walk at the same time In uniform. Still is STDH. So if you're in uniform, you may smoke, but only as long as your legs remain stationary? That is really strangely specific.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 19:31 |
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Grrl Anachronism posted:So if you're in uniform, you may smoke, but only as long as your legs remain stationary? That is really strangely specific. They were having a serious problem with Groucho Marx impressions.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 19:32 |
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Aren't there rules about when and where you can wear your uniform off-base? I know you can wear your dress uniform to weddings and poo poo like that, but wouldn't your superiors frown on just running errands in your uniform?
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 19:32 |
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I'm pretty sure unless the writer was also in uniform the guy could have just ignored him.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 19:45 |
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It came from Facebook ... but with the quote "First off the spelling is atrocious. SECOND Bill Gates was the son of a lawyer." At least I know some sensible people.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 19:58 |
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GWBBQ posted:It came from Facebook ... but with the quote "First off the spelling is atrocious. SECOND Bill Gates was the son of a lawyer." I assume that's an allusion to Jesus? Either way this is one of the more terrible STDH because of the awful spelling and grammar.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 20:04 |
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That was clearly written by someone who's never met either variety of rich people. New money are the ones dropping crazy big tips. Inheritors half the time don't tip at all because "I'm already paying the price on the menu, why should I pay extra? " Also you'd have to be kind of an rear end in a top hat waiter to complain about a $505 tip. And how did he even know which one tipped more? This story is dumb.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 20:07 |
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Fascinator posted:Aren't there rules about when and where you can wear your uniform off-base? I know you can wear your dress uniform to weddings and poo poo like that, but wouldn't your superiors frown on just running errands in your uniform? The only rules I ever heard was that you couldn't wear it to anywhere in bad tastes like a strip club or a bar. I never tried to wear mine anywhere but to work. They also have a rule about not talking on your cell phone and walking at the same time. There and hundreds of dumb army rules but I don't want to start a derail.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 20:10 |
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duralict posted:Also you'd have to be kind of an rear end in a top hat waiter to complain about a $505 tip. And how did he even know which one tipped more? This story is dumb. You'd think the Gates wouldn't need to split the check up. Just let bill cover the whole thing.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 20:38 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2024 22:44 |
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I don't even get the message that is trying to convey. If you bring yourself up by the bootstraps into wealth, don't share it? Also, Bill Gates had really wealthy parents, and he went to Harvard. He's not a rags to riches story in the least. More like a riches to richest ever story.
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# ? Feb 15, 2013 21:07 |