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Pander
Oct 9, 2007

Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.



There are a lot of people having faith in a team with 5.7 ERA.

(trust me, 6.33 R/G is sustainable!)

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TKBomber7285
Feb 20, 2011
Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

TKBomber7285 fucked around with this message at 21:31 on Mar 11, 2013

UltimoDragonQuest
Oct 5, 2011





Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados

Detroit Cougars

Antarctica Unspecifieds

Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
South Bolton Eazy W's (c)

Ryleh Cultists (c)

Montreal Manatees (c)

Rockford Losers (c)

Grinnblade
Sep 24, 2007

TKBomber7285 posted:

Pick 'em!

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas

You pick me in what even I would consider to be a massive upset, but then can't decide who wins between the Jobbers and the Pandas? Okay then...

gardenald
Jul 23, 2007

In the end, it comes down to throwing one pitch after another, and seeing what happens. With each new consequence, the game begins to take shape.
Pick 'em!

Cleveland Unicorns

daho Potatoes

Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c)

TKBomber7285
Feb 20, 2011

Grinnblade posted:

You pick me in what even I would consider to be a massive upset, but then can't decide who wins between the Jobbers and the Pandas? Okay then...

Admittedly I also wanted to pick the Jobbers for a big upset. The way those picks are scored it isn't worth it to risk it.

Armitage
Aug 16, 2005

"Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."

Pander posted:

There are a lot of people having faith in a team with 5.7 ERA.

(trust me, 6.33 R/G is sustainable!)

Especially since we're gonna get smacked around by the Luna Landers much like how many pitiful tag teams got smacked around by the Road Warriors. Don't see our offense waking up this week!

GrickleGrass
Dec 18, 2011

I speak for the trees.
Pick 'Em

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns
Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes
Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds
Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas

Title Defenses

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

cbx
Dec 4, 2007

Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.
Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados

Detroit Cougars

Antarctica Unspecifieds

Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
South Bolton Eazy W's (c)

Ryleh Cultists (c)

Montreal Manatees (c)

Rockford Losers (c)

ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!
Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

Roëmænce is ælive!

ForeverBWFC posted:

Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

:effort:

blakelmenakle
Sep 1, 2007
AHEM! There's sand on my boots!
Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

mrnoun
Jul 24, 2007
Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.
Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns
Detroit Cougars
Antarctica Unspecifieds
Sad Pandas


South Bolton Eazy W's (c)
Ryleh Cultists (c)
Barons
Rockford Losers (c)

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Pick 'em!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses


Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
Super-League IX, Pre-Week 4: Imago


Injury Report

Arkansas Destroyers
Joe Torre (C) (Attempted to eat a hushpuppie) - 13 days

Burma Imperialists
Eddie Collins (2B) (Burmadness) - 7 days

CERN Colliders
Bob Meusel (OF) (Casualty of Science!) - 88 days

Coburns
Cliff Lee (SP) (Profaned the name of Coburn) - 7 days

Finger Lakes Phoenixes
Bill Dickey (C) (Jumped into gorge) - 20 days

Lovable Losers
Claude Passeau (SP) (Waterskiing gone horribly wrong) - Out for Season!

Montreal Manatees
John Olerud (1B) (Milking Canadian health care system) - 7 days

Rockford Losers
Harry Brecheen (SP) (Back broken as an example to the rest of the team) - 19 days

Web 2.0 Bloggers
Lou Gehrig (1B) (Iron Horse gone lame) - 48 hours











Bobby Bonds is underperforming, and your bullpen isn't that great. Neither of these things are too surprising.








Mark Grace refuses to lose!








I don't know that Lajoie is going to be able to keep up that .449 BA all season long.








Can the greatest gimmick team in Super-League history possibly win this Gauntlet of Gauntlets?






: Okay, back to the Hardcore Title Defenses.
: Wait, before we start, I have a question...Smasher, is this all just lovely fanfic?
: No...but it mostly is. Anyway, it's the Spooners against the Imperialists for the Hardcore title, right now!



: And the Imperialists continue their resurgence as they win the Hardcore Title in a sweep. That's the third time that they've won this title.
: And if CthulhuDreams were here, he'd almost certainly be complaining that Viscount Slim is relying on favorable ratings given to Hilton Smith and Martin Dihigo.
: Yeah, but he doesn't get a vote. Up next, the Bloggers, whose owner has...resurfaced.
: And they're doing great! It looks like you'll be reading Mornacale's spreadsheets for seasons to come.
: Yes...The Bloggers will get taken care of...even if I have to do it myself...



: And the Imperialists retain! This is a great day in Super-League history...but there's one way it could get even better...



: And that's if the Cultists lose their Television Title against the Rakers! That would be truly boss.
: Uh...'Boss'?
: Yes, it would be quite boss.



: And the Rakers win! The Rakers win! What a day to be alive! Well, that will do it for-
: They've still got to defend the Television Title against the Potatoes.
: The Potatoes? I thought I relegated them?
: You did...twice...but they're back and more tateriffic than ever before!
: Well, let's get on with it.



: And the Potatoes win, and that will surely turn their season around! Or not! Probably not. Well, until tomorrow, see you all in hell.
: That's probably a bit harsh.


Pick 'em

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

Smasher Dynamo posted:


: And if CthulhuDreams were here, he'd almost certainly be complaining that Viscount Slim is relying on favorable ratings given to Hilton Smith and Martin Dihigo.
: Yeah, but he doesn't get a vote. Up next, the Bloggers, whose owner has...resurfaced.

I think Martin Dihigo was probably the most valuable player in the Negro Leagues during the period in which he was playing, and deserves multiple MVP awards. As a hitter he could hit like a MLB outfielder, we know he'd draw a ton of walks for a good OBP because Mexico tracked walks unlike the Negro Leagues, and he could play premium defensive positions OK. I would question whether he was that great as a pitcher as a hitter, and it's not clear to me that he could have stuck at shortstop in the majors, but given the context in which he played, he might be the most valuable player ever. Babe Ruth would have been more valuable playing in such a context, but if dredging up a better player involves invoking Babe Ruth, then you're a pretty good player.

I just don't like Hilton Smith.

ScottyJSno
Aug 16, 2010

日本が大好きです!
Cancun Tornados
Detroit Cougars
Antarctica Unspecifieds
Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c)

Intercontinental Championship
Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Barons

United States Championship
Lovable Losers
I can win this!

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates
Luis Aparicio starting at 1B makes it tough to score runs. Who knew?!

Pick 'Em
Cleveland
Detroit
Antarctica
Jacksonville

South Bolton retains
R'lyeh retains
Montreal retains
Rockford retains

Ginge
Sep 8, 2011

Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!


So close. Tom Henke's getting really close to running me out of patience with this latest meltdown, but I'm willing to stick with him a little longer.

Swap Cochrane and Furillo in the batting order against LHP. Cochrane isn't hitting at all right now, and I need to take advantage of Furillo while he's belting out a double every other game or so.

ToiletofSadness
Mar 27, 2010
Pick-em

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Archie Goodwin
Jan 2, 2012
Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.


All away teams win,

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Viscount Slim
Mar 9, 2012


Tornados, Cougars, Forgettables, Jobbers, champs retain.

Warm Sarsaparilla
Jan 3, 2012



I reckon Hershiser in for injured Clifton Lee.


Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Pete Ladd
Mar 9, 2012
Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas

Title Defenses

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers

Beet
Aug 24, 2003
Pickem:

Series
Cleveland Unicorns
Idaho Potatoes
Antarctic Unspecified
Jacksonville Jobbers

Titles
Walney wins IC title, all others retain.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."


Super-League IX, Week 4: You have all failed me for the last time!


Games of the Week


Don May posted:


CERNS USES SCIENCE, DUMB LUCK, TO DEFEAT COBURNS 7-6

Moncton- The will of James Coburn can be fickle.

With the Coburns up 6-1 in the bottom of the seventh, it certainly looked like the Coburns were going to escape with an easy victory. But then everything went terribly wrong, and their bullpen failed them in the most gruesome way possible, giving up four runs over the next two innings.

But the worst was yet to come.

Because, even with that meltdown, the Coburns held a 6-5 lead, and only had three more outs to go. And Tom Henke was in his element, inducing a pop out from Robin Yount before striking out with such force that Bob Meusel's faith in himself completely crumbled, causing him to break down in tears at home plate.

And then Henke, whose nickname of "The Terminator" never seemd more appropriate, forced Lou Gehrig into hitting a weak dribbler towards first base. Henke, with the confidence of a man who knows that he has the game won, trotted to cover first base as Jimmie Foxx retrieved the ball. The game was over.

But Foxx's throw went wide, and Gehrig got to second on the error. The game would continue. Frustrated beyond belief, Henke went back to the mound to once again finish things, and battled Babe Ruth to a full count. Henke wanted to end this with one pitch, and threw his best fastball...that went just a bit wide. Babe Ruth took the walk. Once more, the game would continue.

The next batter was Wally Schang, and Henke took Schang to a full count as well. With the fury of a man cheated of his prize twice, Henke threw the hardest fastball he could but, once again, the ball went just wide, and Schang drew a walk as well. The bases were now loaded with two outs.

With the bases loaded and the strike zone seemingly shrinking by the second, Henke had no choice but to pitch to contact. But the next hitter was Nap Lajoie, one of the best contact hitters to have ever lived. But Henke trucked on, hoping that he could yet pull this out. But when the third pitch of the at-bat was just a little too close to the middle of the strike zone, Lajoie pounced, hitting a double down the right-field line, and scoring two runs, giving the Colliders a comeback victory.

The response from Warm Sarsaparilla was quick and fierce, "Clearly, James Coburn has found the faith of Jimmie Foxx wanting! And, as punishment for having an apostate in our flock, we must all suffer. Only through an act of penance can we restore the favor of Coburn. To that end, I have locked Jimmie Foxx in a chamber that I have called "The Box of Salvation". And, as Foxx sits in the box, with its spike-covered walls and cholrine-enriched atmosphere, not to mention the scorpions, I hope that he learns from this experience, and redevotes himself to the service of the Coburn."

GAME NOTES

-Bob Meusel, having struck out in so dramatic a fashion, immediately took a leave of absence from his team to "find himself" by taking a roadtrip to the American Southwest, helping people with their problems as he drifts from town to town, always searching for some good deed that will finally allow him to forgive himself.

Box Score





Don May posted:


STEVE SOMEHOW BLOWS GAME ALL BY HIMSELF, UNICORNS KILL TORNADOS 18-7

Cleveland- Well, that must have seemed like a good idea to someone.

Steve, Prince of Fate officially had two errors, but an unofficial count had him make five errors at second base, one error at catcher, and two passed balls, to go along with his 0-for-8 performance at the plate as UltimoDragonQuest made the marginally insane decision to start Steve at both Catcher and Second Base in the same game.

The high point, or rather low point, of Steve's day came when he reached first on a fielding error, not his own for once, and then, because, per the lineup card, he was batting twice in a row, he had to go back to the plate, leading to him grounding into a double play, getting himself out twice. It was deeply, deeply confusing, as no one was clear on what was going on.

UltimoDragonQuest was baffled by what had happened, and tried to lay the blame on someone, anyone else, "How the hell could I have put the same player in my lineup twice? That's not right! I didn't do that! It's not my fault. No, something terrible has happened here. Something so awful that I can scarcely put it into words. Something very dark has awakened in the Super-League. Too bad I couldn't have cloned a player capable of using a fielding glove, though."

Sam Leever, who got the complete game win despite not pitching, was baffled, "Nothing that happened in this game made any sense. I'm happy I got the win, but I'm still not quite sure on how I did that."

Steve explained to the audience what happened, "The dichotomy between mortal man and space noble exploded, and yet, each half was lesser than that of the whole, and both fell, knowing now that only in unity is there strength." It was not a very good explanation.

Asked for comment on what went wrong, Commissar Dynamo explained that, "There is no cause for concern. All is well. Continue to go about your day-to-day business and worry no more about this mysterious circumstance. Yes, it may seem insane that Steve was able to effectively divide himself into two to play this game, but I assure you that it is under control, and will cause none of you any harm. No, the only thing that might hurt is asking the wrong questions. Life is sometimes better with a little mystery, don't you agree?"

GAME NOTES

-Please do not share the terrifying secret that led to this incredible game. The madness must end here.


Box Score





Don May posted:


LANDERS CONTINUE DOMINATION, CRUSH DESTROYERS 10-1

Moonbase 0-2- The Moon is suddenly no longer a fun place to be.

Josh Gibson continued his blazing start with two home runs, giving him nine on the season, as Rick Reuschel picked up his fourth win of the season with another marvelous performance as the Landers easily handled the Destroyers, who saw their good start to the season run right into the brick wall that are the Super-League IX Luna Landers. And, as the Destroyers appeared to be the only team in the Landers' division with even a chance of stopping them, it almost seems as if the Landers have locked up the division in the first month of the season.

This assessment mrnoun agreed with, "There is no hope for any of you. From a quarter of a million miles away, I look down on you, sitting in judgment of you. And my judgment will be harsh and unsparing. There will be no mercy for any of you. There will be no plucky underdog story. As for the Destroyers, it sickens my heart to think that they made the playoffs last season. Of course, I took care of them then, but it looks like I'll have to be a bit more strident this time around. The Destroyers need to have their will broken for once and all." mrnoun then slowly shook his head.

"I've given the matter a bit of thought." mrnoun said, the contempt dripping from his voice, "I think I know who the Destroyers really are. The Destroyers are basically the baseball equivalent of Credence Clearwater Revival. They're from the South, they're more successful than they deserve, and they only know three loving chord. Oh, don't get me wrong, they play all three of those chords well, but, at the end of the day, a band that only knows three chords can never be truly great. Hell, they can barely be good. And I don't care how many "Fortunate Son"s or "Run Through the Jungle"s you have, Craig, because, at the end of the day, you're just not good enough to be anything other than lovely incidental music in a crappy period movie. You are nothing!" mrnoun, having finished his deeply confusing monologue, then left the podium, still angry.

CraigK hardly noticed, as he had his own problems. "How the gently caress did we get six loving doubles, and only one run? How the gently caress did we do that? I honestly want to know, because it makes no sense at all. How the hell does something like that even happen? drat! Anyway, we are not CCR, you fucker, we are Lynyrd Skynyrd. We made awesome music and rocked on forever. We're Free Bird! And this bird has to fly! Just like Lynyrd Skynyrd, man! Yeah! Wait...Lynyrd Skynyrd...flying? Huh."

GAME NOTES

-SUDDEN DEATH, the psychopomp of the Super-League, started a catcher today, as Josh Gibson got the day off from catching. As is tradition, before the game, SUDDEN DEATH point his skeletal finger at the Destroyers, intoning, "Soooooooooon." Before taking the field.

Box Score





Don May posted:


COUGARS AND ELITES FIGHT TO THE FINISH!

Detroit- Mooseontheloose and cbx have never been the luckiest owners in the Super-League. Coming into this season, they had been relegated a combined five times without a single playoff appearance between them. But they both believe that this year will be different.

For that reason, both teams needed this win today. They needed to get off to a good start.

And so, with the Cougars down 5-4 in the bottom of the ninth, cbx was desperate for anything to go right. His team had to win, or else. And with Joe Nathan on the mound it was going to be tough. Well, tough in theory. When Ted Williams is on your team, all things are possible. Ted Williams wasn't going to let his team lose this game, and so he did what he had to do, hitting a long home run out of the park to tie the game at five.

But the Cougars could do no more, and the game went to extra innings. With both sides exhausted, the next two inning passed without either side scoring a run. Suddenly, in the top of the twelfth, the Elites came alive again, as Bonds and Bonds used their dreaded doppleganger powers to push a run across the plate, giving the Elites a 6-5 lead.

With the pressure back on the Cougars and Ted Williams not due up, it would be up to the bottom of the lineup to save the day. The Cougars came out swinging and, in the span of five pitches from Mark Littel, they managed to string together a Chipper Jones double, a Orlando Cepeda line out, a Tom Haller single, and then a wild pitch to score Jones. Once more, the game was tied, this time at 6. But, once again, that was all the Cougars managed, and the game continued.

The Elites, irritated that the Cougars would do not do them the simple courtesy of just laying down and dying already, once more attacked the Cougars' bullpen. After three straight singles to score one run, Barry Bonds the younger gave the Elites a 9-6 lead with a two-run double that seemed to break the back of the Cougars. With a three run lead, and only three outs, it looked as if this game might finally be over.

But Ted Williams wasn't quite ready to give up just yet. The Elites, however, had seen this show before, and walked him on four pitches, figuring that, with a three run lead, he was much less dangerous on the bases than at bat. And then Hank Greenberg crushed the next pitch over the center field fence to score two runs, and narrow the Elites' lead to just 9-8, and all this with no outs in the inning.

Reasserting himself, Elites reliever Wil McEnaney struck out Chipper Jones on four pitches. The Cougars, more resilient than one would have expected, came back with an Orlando Cepeda single, but the weakest part of the Cougars' lineup was due up, and both owners knew it. Tom Haller, never the strongest batter on the team, popped up for the second out of the inning. With the weak-hitting Harvey Kuenn up next, cbx had no choice but to order Cepeda to steal second. Cepeda was slow, but Kuenn was nothing more than a singles hitter, and Cepeda certainly wasn't going to score from first on a single. It was a risky move, but the Elites had pulled Ted Simmons for a pinch runner, and had no backup catcher. Cepeda just beat the throw. But Kuenn, his knees shot, his bat speed gone, hit a weak fly to center field, which was easily caught by Van Slyke for the final out.

After the game, cbx declined comment. Some games just break your hearts.

GAME NOTES

-Mooseontheloose did have a post-game comment in the form of a 250-page treatise of the "Counter-Comeback Dynamics in the Later Modern Super-League". No one had time to read it.

Box Score





Team Statistics








Analysis

I'm starting to think that Rogers Hornsby just hates you.









Analysis

On the one hand, it's cool that your team is entirely supporting by power pitching. On the other, I don't think it's sustainable. Your hitters need to start hitting.









Analysis

Your right field platoon makes me sad.









Analysis

Roberto Alomar still isn't a shortstop, but if he keeps hitting like this, who the gently caress cares?









Analysis

Another injury. Well, looks like it's up to Pafko.









Analysis

Just a lot of weirdness hitting your team at once. Still, if you can survive it, great things await you.









Analysis

Only home runs are keeping you alive.









Analysis

Bonds already has 24 walks on the season. That's outstanding for the Super-League.









Analysis

Starting out slow once again.









Analysis

Your team isn't hitting enough and it isn't pitching enough. But it's still early.









Analysis

Bad luck catches up with every team in the Super-League eventually. That or the Macho Men.









Analysis

Still hanging on, but two Bonds are going to be able to save a team on their own.









Analysis

I'm not sure where the myth of the invincible Chick Hafey came from, but the only thing that Chick Hafey is going to lead your team to is an early grave.









Analysis

4-2 for the week! Clearly, the radio has told you everything it knows!









Analysis

WAKE UP!









Analysis

Well, your best pitcher just had his arm blown to pieces. That's bad.









Analysis

CRUSH! KILL! DESTROY!









Analysis

I don't have any new cunning plans for you this week. But I'm not sure you need one right now.









Analysis

Keep hanging in there.









Analysis

Why can't Forgettables pitch?









Analysis

Johan Santana just ruins everything.









Analysis

Over .500...somehow.









Analysis

The spirit of Freddie Mercury is strong in this one.









Analysis

Almost swept by the Spooners, but a team this good doesn't get swept in a four-game series.









Analysis

Good pitching can cover up a lot.









Analysis

Marty Marion still can't hit.









Analysis

Well, I guess McDowell will turn it around eventually.









Analysis

Your pitching has turned out about as well as could be expected.









Analysis

No way Furillo keeps this up.









Analysis

It's like there's some sort of cosmic force that keeps breaking your Bonds. It's not me, though, if it were me, I'd definitely start by breaking your Radbourn. You have much less pitching depth.


Standings






Pick 'em

Perfect score for the Elites!

Cancun Tornados @ Cleveland Unicorns

Detroit Cougars @ Idaho Potatoes

Omaha Forgettables @ Antarctica Unspecifieds

Jacksonville Jobbers @ Sad Pandas


Title Defenses
Titles only change hands on sweeps, pinfalls or submissions!

Larkin-Downing and European Championships
South Bolton Eazy W's (c) @ Finger Lakes Phoenixes

Intercontinental Championship
Walney Rakers @ Ryleh Cultists (c)

Heavyweight Championship
Montreal Manatees (c) @ Barons

United States Championship
Rockford Losers (c) @ Lovable Losers


Burma Imperialists: 22 points
Harvard Elites: 22 points (1 Perfect Week)
Menthol Mooses: 21 points
Million Dollar Men: 21 points
Rockford Losers: 21 points
Coburns: 20 points
Doomsday Dervishes: 20 points
Lombard St. Gumshoes: 20 points (1 Perfect Week)
Montreal Manatees: 20 points
Canton Catastrophes: 19 points
Omaha Forgettables: 18 points
Detroit Cougars: 17 points
Skyhawks/Wildcats: 17 points
South Bolton Eazy W's: 17 points
Walney Rakers: 17 points
Chicago Bobbleheads: 16 points
Robert_Deadford's Deadmen: 16 points
Cancun Tornados: 15 points
Idaho Potatoes: 15 points
Jacksonville Jobbers: 15 points
Luna Landers: 15 points
Patagonia Postmodernists: 15 points
Ryleh Cultists: 13 points
Barons: 12 points
Sad Pandas: 11 points
Antarctica Unspecifieds: 9 points
Lovable Losers: 9 points
Web 2.0 Bloggers: 7 points
CERN Colliders: 7 points
Queens Mercuries: 4 points

cbx
Dec 4, 2007

Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.
Yeah, I don't see Willie Mays in his prime with an OBA of under .300 being particularly accurate. Same with Chipper Jones before he got all old and fat only rolling an 87 and stinking up the joint. Dixie Walker being my best hitter at the moment? Heh. Yeah. I've gotta say that we're due for a massive adjustment shortly.

Monathin
Sep 1, 2011

?????????
?



Long live the dingers!

Since I might as well use him while I've got him, Gaylord 'Timelord' Perry is to replace Sudden Sam McDowell as my #3 starter. Sudden Sam gets Perry's job as Long Relief.

This Week, on Bullpen Shuffle! Jose Mesa on Short Relief, Eric Gagne on Middle Relief, Frank Williams to AAA.

Monathin fucked around with this message at 04:55 on Mar 13, 2013

ScottyJSno
Aug 16, 2010

日本が大好きです!


Pitching
Move Wyse to the #3 starter spot. Appier moves to the Long Relief.

Lineup
When Munson is starting:
1 - Ichiro -CF
2 - Munson - C (4 on 1 for Molina)
3 - Bonds - LF
4 - McGwire - 1st
5 - Salmon - RF
6 - Dunston - SS
7 - Sandberg - 2B
8 - Glaus - 3B
9 - P

When Molina starts
1 - Ichiro -CF
2 - Dunston - SS
3 - Bonds - LF
4 - McGwire - 1st
5 - Salmon - RF
6 - Sandberg - 2B
7 - Glaus - 3B
8 - Molina - C
9 - P

Archie Goodwin
Jan 2, 2012
Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.

cbx posted:

Yeah, I don't see Willie Mays in his prime with an OBA of under .300 being particularly accurate. Same with Chipper Jones before he got all old and fat only rolling an 87 and stinking up the joint. Dixie Walker being my best hitter at the moment? Heh. Yeah. I've gotta say that we're due for a massive adjustment shortly.

This is just how Willie Mays is in Mogul, apparently. But, hey, if you challenge, I'll ride your coat-tails.

Personally, I'd like to know how the Skyhawk Nolan Ryan was so unstoppable but mine, from a year later, is so eminently hittable.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Archie Goodwin posted:

This is just how Willie Mays is in Mogul, apparently. But, hey, if you challenge, I'll ride your coat-tails.

Personally, I'd like to know how the Skyhawk Nolan Ryan was so unstoppable but mine, from a year later, is so eminently hittable.

Skyhawks Nolan Ryan had a nice, big stadium to hang out in, and the Skyhawks usually had really good defense. Also, the league was probably a bit easier back then.

Besides, your Ryan just had one really bad start, and a bunch of bad luck.

Archie Goodwin
Jan 2, 2012
Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Skyhawks Nolan Ryan had a nice, big stadium to hang out in, and the Skyhawks usually had really good defense. Also, the league was probably a bit easier back then.

Besides, your Ryan just had one really bad start, and a bunch of bad luck.

My stadium's pretty big (347/380/415/395/360) and in a wet city, and Ryan was so bad last year I had to bench him.

But I'm just grousing. I was lucky last season, and unlucky this one. It's still fun. I've got to say something about the reversal of fortune, is all.

the holy poopacy
May 16, 2009

hey! check this out
Fun Shoe


Send Paul Quantrill to the minors, call up John Olerud to the bench, swap Duane Ward and John Candelaria's position in the bullpen.

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.
http://lpix.org/1118241/Team25-ABanner.PNG

SUMMON THE PIZZA BOY

Batting order vs RHP

1. CF: Tris Speaker
2. 2B: Rodger Hornsby
3. DH: Mike Piazza
4. 1B: Albert Pujols
5. LF: Stan Musial
6. SS: Arky Vaugn
7. RF: Mel Ott
8. 3B: Ron Santo
9. C: Gabby Hartnett

Batting order vs LHP

1. CF: Tris Speaker
2. DH: Rodger Hornsby
3. C: Mike Piazza
4. 1B: Albert Pujols
5. SS: Arky Vaugn
6. LF: Indian Bob Johnson
7. 2B: Craig Biggo
8. 3B: Ron Santo
9. RF: Carlos Beltran

I know that using

FIXING THE BULLPEN

Okay, extensive analysis reveals that the game likes to use SRs differently if they are in the number 1 or 2 slot. So please make the following change to the bullpen:

CL: Sasakki
SU: Joakim Soria
SR: Jeff Montgomery
SR: Phil Coke

So Jeff is the number 1 SR and Phil Coke is number 2.

Cthulhu Dreams fucked around with this message at 05:37 on Mar 13, 2013

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

Archie Goodwin posted:

My stadium's pretty big (347/380/415/395/360) and in a wet city, and Ryan was so bad last year I had to bench him.

But I'm just grousing. I was lucky last season, and unlucky this one. It's still fun. I've got to say something about the reversal of fortune, is all.

Do you want to trade him? Or Eddie Plank?

Cthulhu Dreams fucked around with this message at 05:49 on Mar 13, 2013

Archie Goodwin
Jan 2, 2012
Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

Do you want to trade him? Or Eddie Plank?

I'm open to that, but I'm skeptical about the offer.

Mooseontheloose
May 13, 2003


Drop Davis to the Minors, bring up Terry Kennedy, have him catch for in the 1st game to give Simmons a day off and then make him the personal catcher for Drabek.

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

Archie Goodwin posted:

I'm open to that, but I'm skeptical about the offer.

He has sucked for two seasons - but yeah fair enough. i might not be able to do anything useful. What do you actually want? You've got guys doing badly across the board so I'd need a view of where you are looking to go.

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Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates


Everybody who's freaking out, keep in mind that we're not even close to halfway to most of the stats we have access to stabilizing.

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

Okay, extensive analysis reveals that the game likes to use SRs differently if they are in the number 1 or 2 slot.

I loving knew it! :colbert:

Also I'm already 3 games below my pythag. :argh:

Here's a small request: when we reach the end of a month, could you post the next month of the calendar also? So that we always know who we're playing in the upcoming week.

Anyway, spreadsheet.
- Delahanty has displeased me, so he fucks off to AAA to make way for Norm Cash. Hopefully the A.I. will actually start him over Luis loving Aparicio; if you could ensure that happens, it would be great.
- Mathews/Youkilis platoon resumes, I hope that whoever I play after the Unicorns has a lefty pitcher.
- Holtzman and Hendrix swap places for the week. Hopefully the Unicorns' lefty-heavy lineup enjoys facing three straight LHP.
- Lineup and personal catcher stuff
- All my best players, please stop getting hurt! :ohdear:

Finally, to celebrate coming back to my beautiful Bloggers, I'm going on vacation and may or may not post til Sunday night. If anything wild and crazy happens with my team, please shepherd them through the storm if I can't.

e: Incidentally, I still have this Lolich/Pappas/Douglas I'd be happy to move, if anyone wants bottom-of-the-rotation pitching. I need relievers and a lefty 3B or CF, or just general ~value~.

Mornacale fucked around with this message at 07:27 on Mar 13, 2013

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