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Atlas Hugged posted:Let's just be clear that "devs" here means "people who wanted to pay $800 for a Tegra 3 but didn't necessarily have any developer credits to their name now or ever". Oh I'm well aware of what 'devs' means in the context of OUYA. I should have used quotes. Sorry man. This thing really does get more hilarious every day.
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Mar 21, 2013 12:20
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Joe Don Baker posted:Oh I'm well aware of what 'devs' means in the context of OUYA. I should have used quotes. Sorry man. This thing really does get more hilarious every day. Don't forget, Uhrman also loves to to make the same logical conclusion at every talk: Since 7000 people made an account on the dev forums that 7000 developers are making games for OUYA. OUYA dev forums are a gem. My personal favorites are threads in broken english asking if one semester of "java" will let them program video games, or about 5000 posts of people saying they have a great idea for a game and need an artist, a programmer, and a development team to get their sweet idea off the ground. Btw, the idea is a secret, so you need to promise your allegiance before they tell you their secret idea but here's a hint: it's probably a DayZ clone or an MMO.
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Mar 21, 2013 12:34
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So we have a week and change before this thing sinks into the ocean of time. What part of their promises have they lived up to so far? What actual knowledge do we even have about this thing? Is there a final 'aluminium' product seen by real people yet? have they finished their store page yet? have they finished the design for the controller and fixed that touch pad thing? how do they plan to make money to do a second years worth of these? because they could not possibly be hoping to either make money from console sales or from their store.
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Mar 21, 2013 13:16
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Arro posted:So we have a week and change before this thing sinks into the ocean of time. I'm pretty sure you're underestimating the amount of SECRET SUPPORT by INFLUENTIAL WEALTHY BACKERS that were courted outside of Kickstarter.
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Mar 21, 2013 13:24
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Arro posted:So we have a week and change before this thing sinks into the ocean of time. I wouldn't ask such questions publicly. One day you'll disappear forever.
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Mar 21, 2013 13:46
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Arro posted:So we have a week and change before this thing sinks into the ocean of time. Given the apparent dodgy build quality of the console, how long do you think it'll be before they discover just why you shouldn't make one with an external shell primarily consisting of a conductive metal?
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Mar 21, 2013 13:49
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Joe Don Baker posted:So these devs paid hundreds of dollars extra for a device that is essentially defective and improperly designed. There is a distinct possibility playing some games on those devices will cause them to overheat and shutoff and/or cause damage to the board. It still boggles my goddamn mind. "This is gong to change consoles forever! We've got no working prototype and don't really know how we're going to build it, but hey, you shouldn't worry about that! Oh, and there is going to be a whole new storefront too, with free games for the people! It'll (probably) work. And you're gonna get the Stradivarius of controllers too with people who may or may not have designed a controller before! All this in seven months! For the low low price of a million dollars!" If any major gaming company came out and said that they were going to make a console that went from design, production to stores in less than a year, they'd be laughed at. Yet, somehow, these people will mystically be able to do it with very few technical problems and at the same time drastically alter the history of gaming? Give me a loving break. Also, what if they had only gotten their million? How the hell do you design a console, a controller and a storefront for a million dollars? That alone says a lot about how well they planned this. It is easy to see why people thought this was a scam. Anyone who gets burned on this frankly deserves to since the writing was on the wall from the beginning.
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Mar 21, 2013 14:09
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Wasn't there some exclusive Kickstarter package where big donators would get their names inscribed on the SUE-YEAH motherboard or case or something? Are those due out at the end of the month too?
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Mar 21, 2013 14:10
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Atlas Hugged posted:Let's just be clear that "devs" here means "people who wanted to pay $800 for a Tegra 3 but didn't necessarily have any developer credits to their name now or ever". You know, not for nothing, but capitalism kinda is like one of those cash boxes, especially when you take the science of marketing into account. I'm not saying this to assign some kind of magic unicorn fart dust to the HOOHAH but yeah, spending money to promote the thing is actually pretty smart...even if they are a bunch of grifters.
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Mar 21, 2013 14:15
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Imagine if someone actually did make The Zybourne Clock for the HOOPLAH, then we'd all have to buy it.
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Mar 21, 2013 15:38
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TyroneGoldstein posted:You know, not for nothing, but capitalism kinda is like one of those cash boxes, especially when you take the science of marketing into account. I don't disagree with your principle, but I think the scale is very limited. Crap sells, but only when it is marketed in really specific ways. Take the whole "only available on TV" branding. It's impulse buying through over excited infomercials. They are purchased and forgotten, possibly never even opened. What these things all have in common is that they aren't establishing brands and taking on serious products. How she is advertising this, who she is advertising to, the venues she's speaking at, these are almost all the wrong place. Basically the only smart thing she has done is talk to indie developers directly, and even that has cultivated very limited interest with a whole lot of "wait and see" thrown in. I'm sure it's possible that if she hit just the right demographic with just the right slogan at just the right time, this thing could take off. But that's literally catching lightning in a bottle and you can't really prepare or plan for it. It just sort of happens. If that's what they're actually counting on in a "just throw everything against the wall and see what sticks" kind of way, they're in worse shape than I thought.
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Mar 21, 2013 15:42
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Meat Recital posted:Wasn't there some exclusive Kickstarter package where big donators would get their names inscribed on the SUE-YEAH motherboard or case or something? Are those due out at the end of the month too? The MARY-SUE, in this case.
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Mar 21, 2013 15:59
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Atlas Hugged posted:I'm sure it's possible that if she hit just the right demographic with just the right slogan at just the right time, this thing could take off. But that's literally catching lightning in a bottle and you can't really prepare or plan for it. It just sort of happens. That's already what happened with the kickstarter, though. But to become a solid product with a future and not just a flash in the pan, the ORANGUTAN has to deliver beyond marketing fluff, doublespeak and hitting the right demographic with catchphrases... and that of course seems highly unlikely at this point.
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Mar 21, 2013 16:27
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Did any of you guys back the Pebble watch on Kickstarter? I ask because I think it's comparable. It was a tech product that absolutely blew up on the Kickstarter platform and became a landmark item. However, it's hilarious to see where the two differ in the after-Kickstarter approach. Pebble basically sent progress e-mails every couple of weeks, and they were in depth logs of how their product design was shaping up, the problems they faced, and how they were going to handle mass production and distribution. I personally never felt worried about my purchase because I knew they were actually hard at work on making a good product.
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Mar 21, 2013 16:39
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The Dave posted:Did any of you guys back the Pebble watch on Kickstarter? Julie Uhrman has been hard at work speaking with everybody. 
circ dick soleil fucked around with this message at 17:25 on Mar 21, 2013 |
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Mar 21, 2013 17:11
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Atlas Hugged posted:In retrospect, the NGage actually was sort of a forerunner to modern mobile gaming devices. The only problem is that the technology just wasn't ready to handle it yet, they had no experience in the gaming industry, and they weren't a brand that people trusted for video games. No, it was because people looked stupid talking on an Ngage; this was contemporary with the gameboy and PSP. You also had to remove the battery to change games and Symbian was a pile of poo poo at the time, but public perception, not technology tends to drive these things; Betamax? Any attempt Windows has made to get onto a mobile device? Nokia actually had deals in the water with electronic arts, amongst others, that eventually stalled because nobody bought the bloody phone. Literally boxes and boxes of them were unsold.
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Mar 21, 2013 17:25
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raditts posted:She talks about frames per second the way console warriors of old used to talk about "bits." You raise a good point. Just how many "bits" is the KWAME NKRUMAH?
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Mar 21, 2013 17:38
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Hatbox Ghost posted:Julie Uhrman has been hard at work speaking with everybody. Do you want to tell us who you have been talking to? ... "No." The only way the interviews could get any better would be if she answered "top men" to every question.
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Mar 21, 2013 17:50
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Hav posted:No, it was because people looked stupid talking on an Ngage; this was contemporary with the gameboy and PSP. You also had to remove the battery to change games and Symbian was a pile of poo poo at the time, but public perception, not technology tends to drive these things; Betamax? Any attempt Windows has made to get onto a mobile device? Yeah, they shipped around 2 million units to retailers. How many were actually sold is another story. Nokia never released solid sales numbers because it was an embarrassing flop, so it is tough to compare to the OUYA.
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Mar 21, 2013 17:52
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NewtGoongrich posted:You raise a good point. Just how many "bits" is the KWAME NKRUMAH? More importantly, does it have Blast Processing?
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Mar 21, 2013 17:55
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I think I saw it shading a cell.
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Mar 21, 2013 17:59
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Look, if it has MODE7 I'll consider buying one, because how cool was Pilotwings?
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Mar 21, 2013 18:08
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Hatbox Ghost posted:Julie Uhrman has been hard at work speaking with everybody. You know, this reference raises a good point. Crowdsourcing is a pretty new concept, something that Pebble understood and embraced with a ton of transparency. Julie instead has made it clear she'd rather flex her smug, over-confident salesman persona as if she doesn't owe anyone anything.
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Mar 21, 2013 18:19
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The Dave posted:Did any of you guys back the Pebble watch on Kickstarter? And incidentally, the Pebble watches themselves have had a very high rate of failure (a lot of backers had them break within 3 weeks of actually receiving them). And getting repairs done for them had problems too, a lot of people had to wait several weeks to even get a real response, though the RMA process is now finally in place.
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Mar 21, 2013 18:30
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KillerMojo posted:You know, this reference raises a good point. Crowdsourcing is a pretty new concept, something that Pebble understood and embraced with a ton of transparency. Julie instead has made it clear she'd rather flex her smug, over-confident salesman persona as if she doesn't owe anyone anything. This is truly building into some epic schadenfreude. Its going to fail SO loving hard.
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Mar 21, 2013 18:33
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The Dave posted:Did any of you guys back the Pebble watch on Kickstarter? Honestly, this is good policy not matter the product or the amount raised. I backed a small Kickstarted book that's been delayed by about six months at this point, but the artist sends out regular updates explaining the delays, with photos (when he dropped one printer for another, he included shots of their mockups to show how much higher quality printing the new company offered). As a result, I'm not at all worried about the product I'm going to receive, even though this is the first time the artist has put a book together. Of course for Team OOHRA to have done this, the console needed more than buzzwords and unicorn farts behind it...
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Mar 21, 2013 18:34
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The Dave posted:Pebble basically sent progress e-mails every couple of weeks, and they were in depth logs of how their product design was shaping up, the problems they faced, and how they were going to handle mass production and distribution. I personally never felt worried about my purchase because I knew they were actually hard at work on making a good product. Pebble was also designing a fancy watch, not a console REVOLUTION! The levels of complexity are remarkably different. Red_Mage fucked around with this message at 18:51 on Mar 21, 2013 |
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Mar 21, 2013 18:47
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Red_Mage posted:Pebble was also designing a fancy watch, not a console REVOLUTION! The levels of complexity are remarkably different. They needed more fan art.
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Mar 21, 2013 18:53
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The Dave posted:They needed more fan art. Too bad they didn't have any fan art from  Andrew Dobson posted:The Wii is "old" because it was outdated technology even at launch 7 years ago. The 360 has a goatee because teens and college kids play it a lot. The Ps3 has a top hat because Sony is a greedy moneybags corporation willing to charge $600 at launch, and probably even more for the eventual Ps4. And the tablets running around are like kids because they're new technology and a new market that's quickly growing. BA-DUM-TSSSHHH! Seriously... don't think too hard on this one. the ouya crashing through the wall represents how it will be a breakthrough, cutting into the territory of the big three
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Mar 21, 2013 21:26
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It's very apt analogy since the heat from an OHYEAH is likely to kill a man.
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Mar 21, 2013 21:29
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Wrist Watch posted:Too bad they didn't have any fan art from Oh god dammit I thought I'd never see Dobson ever again. That blogpost is just...amazingly out of touch. I'm pretty sure the PS3 sold at a lose even at launch when it was $600 (and I'm kind of sure they've already talked about price points for the PS4?). But I guess that's what I should expect out of Dobby. ZenMasterBullshit fucked around with this message at 21:35 on Mar 21, 2013 |
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Mar 21, 2013 21:29
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ZenMasterBullshit posted:Oh god dammit I thought I'd never see Dobson ever again. That blogpost is just...amazingly out of touch. I'm pretty sure the PS3 sold at a lose even at launch when it was $600 (and I'm kind of sure they've already talked about price points for the PS4?). But I guess that's what I should expect out of Dobby. I just love that his visual depiction for Sony is based on launch date pricing. You know, that thing that happened six years ago.
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Mar 21, 2013 22:06
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Zelder posted:I just love that his visual depiction for Sony is based on launch date pricing. 'Andrew Dobson never grows up' was a common sentiment in the old mock thread for him.
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Mar 21, 2013 22:08
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Madcosby posted:Don't forget, Uhrman also loves to to make the same logical conclusion at every talk: Since 7000 people made an account on the dev forums that 7000 developers are making games for OUYA. This makes me think of SA user bestow. He wanted to make a crowd sourced MMO and he had nothing to offer development of the game. He couldn't code, do any art and anything of any use. About 3 or 4 mock versions of the game were made by goons. I set him an assignment to make a game, he failed and got a friend of his to make a game while he contributed nothing. People like bestow are exactly the type of developers for the OOGA, it's such a hilarious train wreck of "development".
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Mar 21, 2013 22:13
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ZenMasterBullshit posted:I'm pretty sure the PS3 sold at a lose even at launch when it was $600 The consoles are loss leaders for the software, it's one of the reasons that dvelopment goes through SCEE and SCEA. It's not the best model in the world because it means you have to keep the software artificially high and this is proving problematic in a world that includes St Gabe, blessings be upon his name. One of the reasons Playstation got so uptight with chipping was this entire process, as someone with a chipped console could conceivably cost Sony money. Cigarette packet math can show you the 'correct' price for one of these items if you build a like-for-like PC and cost that up as COTS -20%, although with at least the first gen PS3 you're also throwing money into the hole left by cell processor development. Supermarkets work the same way with Bread and Milk; they're subsidized off the back of other items to keep you coming back for the essentials and impulse buying granola bark from the checkouts. ^^^ You just don't get being the 'ideas guy'.
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Mar 21, 2013 22:18
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Wrist Watch posted:Too bad they didn't have any fan art from Why the gently caress is the Wii holding a cane and sporting an old man beard when it literally came out the latest of the three consoles??
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Mar 21, 2013 23:28
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Requested_Username posted:Why the gently caress is the Wii holding a cane and sporting an old man beard when it literally came out the latest of the three consoles?? Because they all have as much dust on them.
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Mar 21, 2013 23:33
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Requested_Username posted:Why the gently caress is the Wii holding a cane and sporting an old man beard when it literally came out the latest of the three consoles?? The reason given is because it has the oldest hardware. Of course the Wii U did just launch with much better hardware than the 360, PS3 and (of course) HOOHAH, but let's ignore that fact because it would upset those who wish to dickride the HOOHAH.
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Mar 21, 2013 23:53
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Requested_Username posted:Why the gently caress is the Wii holding a cane and sporting an old man beard when it literally came out the latest of the three consoles?? By which he means that it had the least powerful system specs out of all of them and that makes it "outdated" despite it launching with a brand new control system that the other two then had to develop new technology to compete with.
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Mar 21, 2013 23:55
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Maybe the comic is supposed to suggest that if the HOOVER was a living thing it'd be too stupid to figure out how to use doors. Are these things in the wild yet or what
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Mar 21, 2013 23:59
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