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Ovues posted:if you're a fan of Jonny Moseley the person, turn back now because we start grilling this mofo for all he's worth. Before episode 3 to after episode 3, I think most people will agree. IntelligentCalcium posted:It's like a slightly less mechanical Microsoft Text-to-speech. SEXTASTIC. COMBO!
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Apr 3, 2013 16:48
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TRICKING TWICE AS GOOD SEXSATIONAL Seriously, blanktester and I get to talking about this in a later video, but who did the announcer work for this? I mean, I know it's some nobody who was probably walking by the recording booth on the day this game got made, but he doesn't sound... human. Like, I can't imagine his normal voice. And if that is his normal voice, then yeaaaahhh, he's an alien. So hey blanktester, if Moseley's a fine steak now, what will he be after episodes 4 and 5? You can wait till then to post pictures if you want. Could I ask you to re-edit the front cover of the game to replace all the people with various cuts of beef, or would that be going too far?
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Apr 3, 2013 20:15
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Mad (cow disease) Trix
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Apr 4, 2013 03:05
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So if you want to pretend that this LP of Jonny Moseley is a weekday, we started out horrified on Monday, adjusted to Tuesday, made it through Wednesday, and now it's time to start looking forward to the weekend. Watch through this fourth episode in anticipation, then throw a big party and get blackout drunk after watching the fifth and final one. Unless there's a second bonus episode, but I don't really know there. Either way, it's Moseley time. If you want to, you can help us as we try to answer the questions surrounding Jonny Moseley and the elusive Skier X, which may or may not be him/his dad/his son/his third grade teacher/his grandma. Any of those are viable. Jonny Moseley Mad Trix Part 4: Las Vegas and Kilimanjaro  Text Link
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Apr 6, 2013 21:26
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Not having an animation, or even a stock sound clip, for falling in the water has got to be the laziest thing about this game.
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Apr 6, 2013 22:54
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"Hey, I remember that, too!" Also yes not having any sort of acknowledgement that you hit the water and just resetting you on land isn't even hilariously bad. Also also oh my god that lava texture. P.S. TWEAKED OUT COMBO
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Apr 7, 2013 00:14
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I want the phrase 'tweaked out combo' written on my grave.
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Apr 7, 2013 00:16
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Endorph posted:I want the phrase 'tweaked out combo' written on my grave. RIP Endorph Beloved Forums Poster And Tweaked Out Combo You will be missed
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Apr 7, 2013 00:18
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Does this game make anyone else feel ill? I can usually watch only the first five or so minutes of each video before I start to feel queasy. I think it must have something to do with the bizarre movement and appalling camera.
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Apr 7, 2013 00:48
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spamman posted:Does this game make anyone else feel ill? I can usually watch only the first five or so minutes of each video before I start to feel queasy. I think it must have something to do with the bizarre movement and appalling camera. I can see why. I guess it doesn't really phase me but of course the camera turns every time the character turns because of anything, whether it's you directly turning, or the ground changing, or jumping, or doing really anything.
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Apr 7, 2013 01:09
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Before I post the fifth episode of Jonny Moseley, I just want to show a gif of a guy doing JMMT physics in real life. If only we could find a gif of a guy levitating horizontally to grind a rail. ...Alright, that was fun. Now here's the last of the levels. Jonny Moseley Mad Trix Part 5: Washington D.C. and Antarctica  Text Link
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Apr 10, 2013 19:49
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All right back the gently caress up 'cos Calcium gonna lay down some Moseley storyline. Okay so Moseley's dad is a champion skier but as a child Johnny himself hates skiing, just absolutely hates it. His dad tries to impress him by doing this amazing new trick off a dangerous trail, and asks Johnny to check the conditions before he leaves. Johnny doesn't care though and says it's fine when really there's a huge avalanche risk, oh no! So his dad goes to do this trick and, bam, avalanche, and Johnny is so overcome with guilt that he decides to become an OLYMPIC GOLD MEDAL SKIER. Skier X -is- Johnny's dad but with amnesia from having been trapped in the avalanche and Johnny must battle him head to head in an XTREME SKIING COMPETITION for him to regain his memories. Coming to XBox 720 Q2 2014. Edit: What the hell are those green pipes in Antarctica? Melondog fucked around with this message at 20:35 on Apr 10, 2013 |
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Apr 10, 2013 20:31
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IntelligentCalcium posted:WORDS AND STUFF But what is your explanation for Jonny Moseley's slide back into shittiness immediately after? To me, that's half the story. Also, those green pipes can literally be summed up by that macro with the dude that says "aliens", you all know what I'm talking about. That's the answer - aliens. EDIT: On second thought, maybe I could start up a Jonny Moseley story competition. YOU ALL submit your best full-length play or novel or movie about the mysterious backstory of Jonny Moseley and Skier X. Could be fun.
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Apr 10, 2013 21:47
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Okay so when he beats Skier X in an XTREME COMPETITON and Skier X regains his memories as Johnny's dad, they have a heartfelt reunion and the dad dies for realsies after forgiving Johnny's mistake. With his guilt finally assuaged, Johnny loses his drive to be the #1 most xtreme skier and turns his focus to avalanche safety.
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Apr 10, 2013 22:26
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Calling it now: Skier X is a clone of Johnny Moseley made by the aliens.
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Apr 12, 2013 02:30
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Grope-A-Matic posted:Calling it now: Skier X is a clone of Johnny Moseley made by the aliens. Part of the "Les Moseleys Terribles" project.
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Apr 12, 2013 06:12
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Grope-A-Matic posted:Calling it now: Skier X is a clone of Johnny Moseley made by the aliens. Is he, or is Johnny Mosely an alien-clone of Skier X? 
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Apr 13, 2013 02:34
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IntelligentCalcium posted:Part of the "Les Moseleys Terribles" project. I don't think we need aliens to make Le Moseley terrible.
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Apr 13, 2013 18:50
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Alright, whatever, those are all good answers. New game time! Let's maybe play Mountain Bike Adrenaline, I dunno, you decide  What is this game? Mountain Bike Adrenaline is a game that I bought just because it looked so absolutely generic that I wanted to see how generic it was. However, turning around and looking at the back of it, blanktester and I were BLOWN AWAY by how apparently good the graphics would be. Seriously, look at these graphics!  So what do you mean 'you decide'? I'm going to admit, after I did this first episode, I wasn't quite feeling into it. I mean, I could get through the game, but it was really kind of ehhhhh. So in response, it's up to YOU guys to tell me what to do. Do I do it, or do we say 'gently caress this' and go do something that's guaranteed to either be hilarious or disappoint, something like...ohh...Evolution Skateboarding? Watch, decide, help out, and I'll go down that path. Mountain Biking Adrenaline Part 1  Text Link Insetik fucked around with this message at 18:57 on Apr 19, 2013 |
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Apr 14, 2013 21:18
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Ovues posted:Alright, whatever, those are all good answers. New game time! It looks like a good one off, like something you could make blanktester and allen play, but I don't think it's good material for a full LP. Especially if you feel like it's going to burn you out.
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Apr 14, 2013 22:01
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I don't think you should keep this one going. It is fairly uninteresting and glitchy but not in a way that will make it funny.
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Apr 14, 2013 22:37
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Yeah, maybe just do stopwatch mode if I do do this game. As you saw in the video, when I went into challenge mode and the 'content' of the game doubled, I was like "ffffuuuuuuck". This is such a weird extreme sports game. It's not really about sick tricks, and it's not really about racing. It's...almost like the Gran Turismo of extreme sports games: About the technicalities of biking rather than about doing cool things with it. Sort of like how NRA gun club was 100% about the guns themselves and 0% about doing fun things with them.
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Apr 15, 2013 02:05
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If you come back to it when you've figured out the game, I think it might be somewhat interesting to watch. But, if you aren't having fun playing it; I can't see any point in doing more than a video or two on it.
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Apr 15, 2013 04:59
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I'd like to see another video of you playing it and understanding how it plays at least. It might be kinda ok once you understand gears and power and 90 degree turn (81 degree).
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Apr 15, 2013 05:18
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Croccers posted:I'd like to see another video of you playing it and understanding how it plays at least. It might be kinda ok once you understand gears and power and 90 degree turn (81 degree). Why doesn't the trick percentage stop at 100 percent? WHY CAN I DO 130 PERCENT OF A TRICK? I'll play around with it a bit more. I have the feeling that if I know how to do things, I could do like 10 events in one video. If I keep doing MBA, I might run a second game as well. Another choice I guess; I'm looking at X-Games Skateboarding and Evolution Skateboarding. If anyone has experience with either, which one is Insetik fucked around with this message at 06:19 on Apr 15, 2013 |
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Apr 15, 2013 06:15
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Ovues posted:Yeah, maybe just do stopwatch mode if I do do this game. As you saw in the video, when I went into challenge mode and the 'content' of the game doubled, I was like "ffffuuuuuuck". Maybe if we get bored or something. Mountain Bike Adrenaline could more accurately be called Hill Bike Boredom. Also, I love the ideas for the Jonny Moseley story. In other news, Insetik/Ovues read my most recent paper for my Psych 100 class, and has asked me to share it with you. We were supposed to talk about motivations and emotions, and I decided to discuss something from this thread that motivated me. By reading this, you will also learn other things about me, like that my roller-coaster of a writing style isn't funny even though I think it is and that I couldn't give a poo poo about where my papers go. Here you go. Go ahead and read, it's quite a trip (it's 4 pages). All real-world names have been PS- Since high school, I have subtitled almost every paper with "A Story of Love, Drugs, and the Failings of the Human Condition," but this time I decided to additionally come up with a title for each part of the prompt. We had a 1000 word limit, and my paper exactly meets that. Enjoy! blanktester fucked around with this message at 06:22 on Apr 15, 2013 |
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Apr 15, 2013 06:19
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Yes I can confirm that all of that happened and yes IntelligentCalcium your input in this thread will be indirectly noted by a collegiate professor oh who am i kidding it's psych 100 he's probably a math teacher
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Apr 15, 2013 06:22
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Ovues posted:oh who am i kidding it's psych 100 he's probably a math teacher Actually he's a psych grad student... Who graduated last semester. This is the first and only class he's ever taught.
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Apr 15, 2013 06:30
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Ovues posted:Why doesn't the trick percentage stop at 100 percent? WHY CAN I DO 130 PERCENT OF A TRICK? I think I remember Evolution Skatebording being the game that was the MGS2 Skateboarding Minigame. From what I played of the MGS2 minigame, Evolution Skateboarding is basically THPS: Awful Controls Edition feat. Solid Snake. OneDeadman fucked around with this message at 07:42 on Apr 15, 2013 |
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Apr 15, 2013 07:13
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Ovues posted:Yeah, maybe just do stopwatch mode if I do do this game. As you saw in the video, when I went into challenge mode and the 'content' of the game doubled, I was like "ffffuuuuuuck". This is what I was going to say about it. Clipping into wooden walkways notwithstanding, it looks like they were trying to make more of a realistic mountain biking game than an extreme one. The problem this leads to is that it would probably help to know how to ride a mountain bike when learning the controls. Also, the tricks aren't much because, in reality, there's not a whole lot of tricks you can do while riding down a mountain and expect to reach the bottom in one piece. I wouldn't mind seeing more of this once you do learn the controls better, though if it's going to put you off the idea of the rest of the LP don't bother. Oh, and obviously neither of you guys has been up to 13,000 or 14,000 feet in the Rockies because trees really do grow that small around the tree line.
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Apr 15, 2013 11:11
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Yeah, I've got a few friends into Downhill Biking and it absolutely looks like they tried to go for a realistic approach. Although it looks like Salomon gave a developer $10k and told them to make a "Realistic" Mountain Bike game.
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Apr 15, 2013 13:35
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blanktester posted:Actually he's a psych grad student... Who graduated last semester. This is the first and only class he's ever taught. That paper is hot garbage. But at least it's a psych 100 gen ed so what the gently caress ever is a fine attitude to have. E: Hot garbage from a technical standpoint. Taken as a creative writing/poetry piece it's pretty good.
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Apr 15, 2013 14:06
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Alright, yeah, I'll do some more and do a regular episode before I decide whether to give up or not.
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Apr 15, 2013 15:40
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Random Number posted:That paper is hot garbage. But at least it's a psych 100 gen ed so what the gently caress ever is a fine attitude to have. I was hoping for funny. Apparently I was wrong. OneDeadman posted:I think I remember Evolution Skatebording being the game that was the MGS2 Skateboarding Minigame. Yeah, Evolution Skateboarding was the game that had a preview minigame in MGS2. Which was ridiculous, by the way. OneDeadman posted:Oh, and obviously neither of you guys has been up to 13,000 or 14,000 feet in the Rockies because trees really do grow that small around the tree line. Last time I was up there I was maybe 7 or 8. I guess had I given it a second's thought while we were recording I would have realized that that makes a bit of sense. What doesn't, however, hold up is that only a few meters down the hill the trees appear to get to the same height they are at sea-level. blanktester fucked around with this message at 22:10 on Apr 15, 2013 |
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Apr 15, 2013 22:07
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Personally I'd like to see how the game looks when you get good at it since you seem to have this weird super power of making terribly coded games with awful controls look playable.
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Apr 16, 2013 05:52
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Houle posted:Personally I'd like to see how the game looks when you get good at it since you seem to have this weird super power of making terribly coded games with awful controls look playable. Easy, easy, don't inflate his ego any more than it already is.
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Apr 16, 2013 08:43
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blanktester posted:I was hoping for funny. Apparently I was wrong. It's funny, but there is no cogent line of thought throughout the paper. It's like you wrote a couple of paragraph jokes based on the prompt, threw them in a hat, shook it, and put them in the paper in the order that you pulled them out. It's just disjointed and, taken as a whole, doesn't make sense. I'm sorry but I'm going to need you to turn in your jokester license.
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Apr 16, 2013 13:38
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Random Number posted:It's funny, but there is no cogent line of thought throughout the paper. It's like you wrote a couple of paragraph jokes based on the prompt, threw them in a hat, shook it, and put them in the paper in the order that you pulled them out. It's just disjointed and, taken as a whole, doesn't make sense. I'll make blanktester take it into CC next time before he posts it. Common rookie mistake. By the way, for anyone who really wants to know, "Allen" had just as hard a time with the game as I did.
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Apr 16, 2013 20:04
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Wow I'm so honored to be mentioned among 998 other words. I was hoping for a good laugh out of 'les moseleys terribles' though, that cracked me up. Also this game is...pretty boring, honestly. If you're determined to go through it but can't be bothered to put in the effort to post X full episodes, maybe just a 20 minute highlight (low-light?) reel would be worth it.
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Apr 16, 2013 23:02
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A bit late with this (I tend to periodically remember this thread and watch videos in batches) but you guys actually got me to pick up Downhill Domination and Aggressive Inline and I had a lot of fun with them, so thanks. If you have the chance to play it, I would recommend Whirl Tour. It is a scooter game (I'd say not as bad as Razor Freestyle), it's completely ridiculous - has a storyline AND bosses - and a co-op story mode as well. I think it would make for interesting videos.
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Apr 19, 2013 06:28
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