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StupidSexyMothman
Aug 9, 2010

factorialite posted:

I wanted to find you and trade down, I was sure you wanted him.

Once we skipped the Squirrels I knew I was in good shape, as I would get either the dominant strikeout machine my rotation needed to offset my lovely infield defense or I would acquire a key piece to improve one of the few weak spots in my infield.

I'd trade for him but no idea what I've got left until I find my old roster.

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Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
Oh, I forgot to mention. The two finalists in the EC get special prizes. And by special prizes, I mean mystery boxes. There are two of them this season, Mystery Box #1 and Mystery Box #2. The winner of the EC, let's call them the Pirates, will get their first pick of the boxes, and the runner-up, let's say...the Thunderstorms, will get the second choice of boxes. If one or both teams decides to draft a normal player instead of a mystery box, any remaining mystery boxes will be available for anyone to draft starting with the first pick of the second round.

You can't open a mystery box until the draft ends.

That is all.

ToiletofSadness
Mar 27, 2010
Penultimate Playoff Pick Em Scores

Let's keep this simple: only 2 teams remain in contention for the upcoming sandwich round pick: Zodiac and mks5000. Here's the scores as of this last round of the gauntlet, in which most of you wisely picked the Unspecifieds and Skyhawks.

pre:
Owner	       Score
Zodiac5000	48
mks5000	        39
As of today, here are the picks for the upcoming Commissar Cup Challenge featuring the Luna Landers:
mks5000: Macho Men, 8 games, 7-3
Zodiac5000: Macho Men, 7 games, 9-2

Because both players have selected the Macho Men to triumph, the only way mks5000 can win is by getting a perfect score OR getting the final game score correct as long as the series doesn't end in 7 games. Given this simple winning condition, I leave it up to someone else to deal with the final scoring after tomorrow's last SLIX update.

ToiletofSadness fucked around with this message at 02:44 on May 15, 2013

gardenald
Jul 23, 2007

In the end, it comes down to throwing one pitch after another, and seeing what happens. With each new consequence, the game begins to take shape.
It's a couple days late but I liked my obit smasher :shobon:

Time to start planning my new team I guess!

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."


Canton is a real city. Fair warning.

Owner: Monathin
Location: Canton, OH
Home Grounds: Bunkerdown Stadium

Teams Used
1910 Cincinnati Reds
1966 Cleveland Indians
1987 Cincinnati Reds
1995 Cleveland Indians

Past Records
Expansion Cup VIII
66-96, 4th Place, Barry Larkin Division
Super-League IX
76-86, 3rd Place, Senor Goodtimes Division, Gauntletted
Gauntlet VIII
Round 5: 22-18, 2nd Place, Survived
Round 6: 24-16, 1st Place, Survived
Round 7: 18-22, 3rd Place, Relegated


An obit for the Catastrophes

Hey guys, Monathin wanted to do his own obit, so I figured I'd indulge him. Here we go:

Monathin posted:


Monathin stood over the still-cooling corpse of Detective Don Slaught. Ex-Detective, Monathin corrected himself. Now that the Gumshoes were out of the picture

Okay, so, Smasher, that's as far as I got for now. I was going to do more, but I had to go on a vision quest in the woods all weekend, and so I couldn't work on it at all. But I'm pretty sure that I can get the rest up in a few days.


Well, I'm sorry to hear that, Monathin. But I know that you'll get it done in a timely manner. To that end...

TO BE CONTINUED IN 2017!

Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope
What this poo poo you assholes. I guess with the twelfth (actually eleventh) pick of the Dispersal Draft, the South Dakota Marmosets select '88 Barry Bonds

mrnoun
Jul 24, 2007
I'll cover the Pandas as previously indicated, smasher. You need me to do anyone else?

Revenant Threshold
Jan 1, 2008
Thanks. That relieves my dilemma about getting the guy.

The Leicester Hunchbacks select Jeff Bagwell '98.

alpha_destroy
Mar 23, 2010

Billy Butler: Fat Guy by Day, Doubles Machine by Night
Aww poo poo.
Everybody get ready to point and laugh, I am sure I will gently caress this pick up somehow.

TKBomber7285
Feb 20, 2011


We're alive!!! We're alive!!! I don't have to move to Australia to form the Sydney Kangaroos because the Skyhawks have made it back to the Super-League!

Two questions T.K. First, you were going to move to Australia? Second, you weren't going to name your new team the Wildcats?

Well, the Wildcats idea fell through when those lousy people from Buffalo decided they didn't want "my kind" in their city. I know they're used to losing, but they don't have to keep all joy out of their city.

I doubt that's what they meant.

Anyways, I had a deal with Sydney since they have some beautiful sights to see and it got me out of the country after being charged with 18 USC § 1028. However, with the Skyhawks' return to the Super-League that is quite unnecessary.

Australia has an extradition treaty with the US so that wouldn't have worked anyways. Still, it will be nice to have a chance to reclaim our past glory. The first step will be destroying the Imperialists and Unspecifieds to reclaim the Memento Mori crown.

And then the world!

Beet
Aug 24, 2003

alpha_destroy posted:

Aww poo poo.
Everybody get ready to point and laugh, I am sure I will gently caress this pick up somehow.

I'll trade you 1901 Vic Willis, 1946 Warren Spahn, 1987 Kirk Gibson and 1938 Spud Davis for your pick.

alpha_destroy
Mar 23, 2010

Billy Butler: Fat Guy by Day, Doubles Machine by Night

Beet posted:

I'll trade you 1901 Vic Willis, 1946 Warren Spahn, 1987 Kirk Gibson and 1938 Lonny Frey for your pick.

I am not confident in my ability to draft. But, I want to live and die on my own inability. Like any mad scientist I must endeavor, I must fling myself into the great unknown!

My gut tells me to build a better Pitched Ball Recepticator. My Terry Kennedy Model is hilariously inadequate. But, my experiences trying to field a team on a volcanic isle instilled a fear of my pitch bots failing. And I think Building a Bigger Unit might be the answer. Against my gut I going to forgo building a Joe Torrenator.

With my Pick in the draft I have elected to build an imposing robot. I present the Randy "Big Unit" Johnson No. '98 Cower in fear before my newest creation! Hahaha! I will in no way regret not building a Torrenator, no sir!

Monicro
Oct 21, 2010

And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician


In all honesty I'm probably making a mistake not picking Gehrig, but regardless the Louisville Muggers select 1970 Joe Torre!

GVOLTT
Dec 27, 2012

Honestly, I don't know what I want to put here, so I'm going with this.


I'll take one of them there Mystery Boxes. Which one? The one Beet doesn't take, pending the official EC Championship results being posted.

gingemidget, you're up!

GVOLTT fucked around with this message at 03:58 on May 15, 2013

Ginge
Sep 8, 2011

Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!
The Rakers select '85 Wade Boggs.

FairGame is on the clock.

tatankatonk
Nov 4, 2011

Pitching is the art of instilling fear.
Hey mrnoun, what was the name of that program you used for the basketball sim league?

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.
:siren: Your input required!

I'm going to do a major refresh of the script for SL X, so I would like some input

* Image types! Should I change to jpgs from pngs? I'm leaning to yes because it will drastically reduce filesizes.
* DEfensive Stats! Currently the sabremetric stats are captured, which, with hindsight, are just not that useful in my opinion. Should I keep them, go with traditional stats - fielding %, assists and games started or just cut these stats completely?
* Summary Sheets! What stats do you want on the summary sheet? As I'm leaning towards cutting defensive stats, I'm thinking Streak, ERA, Defensive Efficency, Opponent OBA, Opponent SLG, but I'm happy to take a view on this. One option is to cut defensive stats completely (reducing the number of team screenshots from 136 to 102, and then having 4 shots of the standings screen to let us have:

Standing screen 1: Steak, last 10, OBA, OPS, HRs
Standing Screen 2: ERA, Defensive Efficency, Opponent BA, Opponent OBA, Opponent SLG

* Leader screen: What categories do you want to see? As this is more for cool factor, it should probably be cool things. I was thinking the triple crown stats, or maybe the stan musial triple crown of doubles, OBP and runs scored, but keen to get your views.
* Is there anything else I should change?

I've got the 34 teams part working, so I just need to get this done then hand it over to smasher. Here is some sample output so you can see what you'll get currently:












FairGame posted:

It's my #2 pick in the draft :eng101:

...but yeah, if I hosed up, I hosed up. Seemed like it was an OK deal in IRC and it vastly improves my 3b (Gaetti), SP5 (Chuck Finley), and 1b (Paul Goldschmidt) status.

I think people are underestimating Al Rosen generally. Let me show you something:



If he had a better health score he'd be great.

Cthulhu Dreams fucked around with this message at 13:03 on May 15, 2013

theacox
Jun 8, 2010

You can't be serious.

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

:siren: Your input required!

* Image types! Should I change to jpgs from pngs? ... it will drastically reduce filesizes.

My ancient PC will be your friend if you can reduce image file sizes.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

It's not like we're examining detailed reproductions of Renaissance art so JPEGs are fine. As far as stats are concerned, I look at my team's defense stats but I'd think I only need it once a month at best just to see if my decisions aren't horrific failures, and even then it's hard to make the correlation between those stats and actual defensive performance.

I kind of do wish I could see more peripheral stats for batting/pitching; stuff like total bases (or a breakdown of XBHs), SOs, BBs, IsoP/IsoD etc. I assume though that Mogul has one screen for sabermetric batting stats and that's it.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

kw0134 posted:

It's not like we're examining detailed reproductions of Renaissance art so JPEGs are fine.

Hey! In 500 years, I'd like to think that people will make positive comparisons between the plight of Canton Catastrophes and Titian.

But, yeah, let's keep file size down.

As for the defense screen, I don't like to do this in general, but what about the ratings screen? I figure that's probably the most transparent view into how Mogul sees a player's defensive capability, even if it is a little gamey.

factorialite
Mar 3, 2008

by Lowtax
Juneau Juggernauts
New Roster

Feeders:
1910 Cubs
1914 Tigers
1982 Indians
2006 Devil Rays

pre:
LF Shoeless Joe Jackson (1915 White Sox) (via trade with Oklahoma City Bombers)
CF Ty Cobb (1914 Tigers)
2B Rogers Hornsby (1928 Cardinals) (via Dispersal Draft VIII)
1B Andre Thornton (1982 Indians)
SS Hanley Ramirez (2005 Marlins) (via Dispersal Draft VIII)
RF Sam Crawford (1914 Tigers)
3B Heinie Zimmerman (1910 Cubs)
C  Ron Hassey (1982 Indians)
-pitcher-

C  Johnny Kling (1910 Cubs)
SS Joe Tinker (1910 Cubs)
LF Carl Crawford (2006 Devil Rays)
1B Harry Heilmann (1914 Tigers)
3B Toby Harrah (1982 Indians)

#1 Bert Blyleven (1982 Indians)
#2 Rick Sutcliffe (1982 Indians)
#3 Mordecai Brown (1910 Cubs)
#4 Orval Overall (1910 Cubs)
#5 Ed Ruelbach (1910 Cubs)
CL Mitch Williams (1989 Phillies) (via Dispersal Draft VIII)
SU Jack Pfiester (1910 Cubs)
SR Lew Richie (1910 Cubs)
SR King Cole (1910 Cubs)
MR Harry Coveleski (1914 Tigers)
LR James Shields (2006 Devil Rays)

Minors
LF Jimmy Sheckard (1910 Cubs)
2B Johnny Evers (1910 Cubs)
SS Julio Lugo (2006 Devil Rays)
LR Scott Kazmir (2006 Devil Rays)
This will be my updated team post from now on.

factorialite fucked around with this message at 19:21 on May 28, 2013

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

kw0134 posted:

It's not like we're examining detailed reproductions of Renaissance art so JPEGs are fine.

I initally went with PNG as text is more crisp, but the file size issue is significant so I'll make this change.

quote:

As far as stats are concerned, I look at my team's defense stats but I'd think I only need it once a month at best just to see if my decisions aren't horrific failures, and even then it's hard to make the correlation between those stats and actual defensive performance.

The problem is that they are blatantly hosed. The help files tell me that DRAA is Defensive runs compared to the league at your position. Therefore, the sum of all DRAA ratings should be zero. This is literally a zero sum game. So I make a 4 man league, play a season, and the catchers get these DRAA scores:

Ted Simmons: -23.8 - his backup is Ernie Lombardi with -15.2
Jerry Donovan: -19.7, his backup is Ches Crist who gets -10.9
Harry Bemis: -48, his backup is Fritz Buelow, who gets -7.9
Tom Doran: -8.5, his backup is is actually two guys who go -5.3 and -8.8 respectively.

This adds up to about minus 9 billion, which is clearly not zero. What the gently caress? I might go file a bug report.


quote:

I kind of do wish I could see more peripheral stats for batting/pitching; stuff like total bases (or a breakdown of XBHs), SOs, BBs, IsoP/IsoD etc. I assume though that Mogul has one screen for sabermetric batting stats and that's it.

Yeah, it's really frustrating - these views are not configurable, so I'm stuck with one of these two options: AVG, HR, SB, R, RBI, OBA or PA, OBA, SLG, OPS, ISO, RC/9. I tend to think that RBIs and Rs are still a stat for a reason and it's a big step going to the second display.

Smasher Dynamo posted:

As for the defense screen, I don't like to do this in general, but what about the ratings screen? I figure that's probably the most transparent view into how Mogul sees a player's defensive capability, even if it is a little gamey.

I'm hesitant to do this, but will if you want to. Might see if I work out the bug first.

Cthulhu Dreams fucked around with this message at 14:50 on May 15, 2013

FairGame
Jul 24, 2001

Der Kommander

With the 18th pick in the draft, the St. Louis Self-Congratulators select 1905 Napoleon Lajoie

The Rochester Generics are on the clock.

mrnoun
Jul 24, 2007

tatankatonk posted:

Hey mrnoun, what was the name of that program you used for the basketball sim league?

Jump Shot Basketball. It's fine for screwing around in, and highly moddable, which is why I used it for the league. But it's a relic of the late 90's and it shows in the interface, and the engine has some real flaws in it, as shown by Barkley at SF pretty much breaking the league. If I were to do it again, I'd probably look for a different sim.

Pander
Oct 9, 2007

Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.



The Pandas gave it their all! We are no longer sad pandas no longer! Usher in the era of the Proud Pandas!

ToiletofSadness
Mar 27, 2010

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

Yeah, it's really frustrating - these views are not configurable, so I'm stuck with one of these two options: AVG, HR, SB, R, RBI, OBA or PA, OBA, SLG, OPS, ISO, RC/9. I tend to think that RBIs and Rs are still a stat for a reason and it's a big step going to the second display.


I'm hesitant to do this, but will if you want to. Might see if I work out the bug first.
If we were to post the defensive ratings, would that need to be part of every update? Could that not just be something that is posted at the beginning of the season and maybe post-draft for the new acquisitions?

I'd prefer both sets of offensive stats to having either broken (in the case of the DRAA numbers) or mostly useless (the traditional--who cares about PO and A for most positions?) fielding statistics. It's a shame that the stats sheets aren't customizable because just adding SLG or OPS would be a big improvement.

Pander
Oct 9, 2007

Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.



Defensive stats are neat and would probably adjust how I'd set up a lineup, but if DRAA is broken on some fundamental level then it's pretty moot in the big picture isn't it?

I'd say only do it if it's not much effort. It seems like it'd be a fuckton of effort (~14-16 players per owner?) for a relatively mleh payoff.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

After thinking about it for faarrrrrr too long the Generics take 89 Mark McGwire to hit dingers for me.

Beet and the Somali Pirates are up!

FairGame
Jul 24, 2001

Der Kommander

Do you like crapshoots on borderline Hall of Famers?

Then I've got a player for you!

For the low low price of literally any draft pick, even the last overall in the draft you can have a 21 year old Vladimir Guerrero!

He's basically a fetus (his rookie year 1997; this is the 96 version) but he actually did just fine for me in limited play in the EC, and if he rolls well he's probably better than any other OFer you could get late in the 4th round.

I've got like a million outfielders (and you probably do too) but if you need a Vlad, he's yours.

StupidSexyMothman
Aug 9, 2010

FairGame posted:

Do you like crapshoots on borderline Hall of Famers?

Then I've got a player for you!

For the low low price of literally any draft pick, even the last overall in the draft you can have a 21 year old Vladimir Guerrero!

He's basically a fetus (his rookie year 1997; this is the 96 version) but he actually did just fine for me in limited play in the EC, and if he rolls well he's probably better than any other OFer you could get late in the 4th round.

I've got like a million outfielders (and you probably do too) but if you need a Vlad, he's yours.

Have I got a fourth-round pick for you.

FairGame
Jul 24, 2001

Der Kommander

oldskool posted:

Have I got a fourth-round pick for you.

I don't know. Have you?

GrickleGrass
Dec 18, 2011

I speak for the trees.
Do you like old imitations of their younger borderline Hall of Fame-selfs?

Then I've got a player for you!

For the low low price of literally any draft pick, even the last overall in the draft you can have a 36 year old Vladimir Guerrero!

He's basically a raisin (his rookie year 1997; this is the 2011 version) but he actually did just fine for me puttering about AAA, warming the bench, and occasionally pinch hitting, and if he rolls well he's probably better than any other OFer you could get late in the 4th round.

I've got like a million outfielders (and you probably do too) but if you need an older Vlad, he's yours.

I will not be out-turded. This is a turd eat turd world, son.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
Super-League IV....




: And the Macho Men beat Frank Tanana early and often! And that's it! They've won the series five games to two!
: The Skyhawks may have won three Super-League Championships in four seasons, but not even the famed Lex 'n Tex Express could save them here!


Super-League V....




: Niekro...struggling on the mound....and the Macho Men scorch him for six runs! And they'll take Game 8 by a score 12-5! And there won't be a Game 9 in Gander after all!
: Marauder tried to build the perfect team to stop the Macho Men, but they just could not get the job done. And that makes you wonder who could...


Super-League VII....




: And we'll pick things up in the top of the ninth, the game tied 5-5, and it all comes down to this.
: And there's a big advantage to the Bobbleheads here, because they're bullpen is much deeper than the Macho Men's.
: Goose Gossage on the mound for the Macho Men, and they're going with their closer early. Grace up first...and it's a pop-out! Ruth up now...another pop-out! And finally Josh Hamilton is going to be down on strikes, and Goose Gossage has somehow gotten an easy 1-2-3 inning against three great left-handed hitters.
: That's great, but the Macho Men are using their best reliever now, and that means that if this game goes more than a couple more innings, they'll have to turn to a much weaker reliever.
: Craig Lefferts on the mound for the Bobbleheads, and he's going to get an easy inning of his own, and we'll head to the 10th inning of this winner-take-all game.
: And Lefferts will probably handle the left-handed Ott to lead off the bottom of the tenth, but then Mark Grace will be able to turn to Rivera or Gossage. This is not good for the Macho Men.
: Top of the tenth, and Gossage will give up a leadoff walk to A-Rod. Battles back and...strikeout against Gary Sheffield. One on, one out, and Gossage...walks Brian Giles. Runners at first and second with one out, and Smasher Dynamo is....not warming up anyone in his bullpen.
: There's no one else he can trust to handle this, unfortunately.
: Gossage tries to get himself together, and he...will strike out Rudy York, but he is getting tired out there. Charlie Gehringer up and he...hit a long fly ball, this could go...but no! Killebrew manages to get to it on the warning track, and that will retire the side!
: And Gossage is already at 31 pitches, and you wonder if he can even go another inning.
: Lefferts back out to deal with Mel Ott, and he'll strike out Ott on three pitches.
: And Lefferts can probably come out now.
: No, it looks like he's going to stay in there, and he'll get a groundout from Killebrew. Two outs now.
: I don't have a good feeling about this.
: Jackson with a single, and the inning will continue.
: Okay, Lefferts should come out now!
: Bill Terry with a walk, and runners at first and second with two outs, and Dick Allen up at the plate. Allen is a right-handed hitter, and so he matches up pretty well against the left-handed Lefferts.
: Come on, Mark Grace, don't do this! It's too risky! Bring in Gossage! Bring in Rivera! Don't let Lefferts stay out there! Allen will kill him!
: First pitch...and it's strike one, as Allen takes a fastball.
: I'm begging you, Mark, you can still change this, it doesn't have to end this! Please, take out Lefferts! I'm begging you!
: Lefferts with another fastball, and Allen won't let this one get by him, he hits the ball hard down the third-base line, and here comes Travis Jackson rounding third. Brian Giles' throw to home is...not in time! Jackson scores! Macho Men win! Macho Men win! And we have just seen the final end of the Chicago Bobbleheads.
: WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO ME? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!


Super-League VIII....



: Macho Men win! And with the death of the Bangers, I imagine that will be the last such challenge we see for some time.
: Pop Lloyd made two errors, and the Bangers could not overcome that.
: Yes, all told, a great day for me and the Macho Men, and, when you think about it, pretty much everyone who isn't Marauder. Play the music!


And now....



The Following is a Career vs. Career, Best-of-Nine Series. The losing team must immediately retire! Introducing first, the challenger...




The Luna Landers are the reigning Super-League Champions, having absolutely dominated the Rockford Losers in the Finals, beating them in five games, including four straight to finish the series. They had the best pitching the Smasher League, and possibly either league, and a top-5 offense. They won 107 games, and their run differential indicates they deserved to win that many. Can they know do what no other team has done and slay the mighty Macho Men?


And now, the Champion of Champions....




The Macho Men are back in action!


Keys to the Series

1. Power vs. Control

The Landers' rotation is built around dominating hitters. Clemens, Maddux and Martinez just might be the three best pitchers of the past thirty years, and they they all got there by just being too loving tough for hitters to handle, even as PEDs and smaller ballparks led to the biggest offensive explosion in recent history. Rick Reuschel isn't quite to that level, but he's still an excellent innings-eater who has usually done well in the Super-League. The idea behind this staff is that they don't need gimmicks, they don't need a 'theory' behind them, they're simply going to be better than the other team, and that will be all there is to it.

The Macho Men, on the other hand, had taken a different tack. With Hubbell, Alexander, and Young in the top four, the Macho Men are willing to give up the single if it means that they can prevent a walk or a home run. This strategy does carry with it some risks, but it can be murder on a lineup with a lot of power hitters, especially right-handed power hitters. And, wouldn't you know it, the Landers do happen to have a number of those...


2. Steady State vs. The Grind

Like their rotation, there's nothing too fancy about the Landers' lineup. It simply hits. It stacks a lot of good hitters and, more importantly, different types of good hitters and let's them do their work. The Landers have elite hitters for their position at C, 2B, SS (against RHP), 3B, CF, RF and arguably DH. And their SS and 1B platoons are decent enough to. There's no magic bullet that's going to solve this lineup, it'll be struggle no matter who the Macho Men put on the mound.

The original theory behind the Macho Men is that they put a bunch of patient hitters together and grind the opposing starting pitcher into dust, and then feast on the relatively weak middle relief. Against the Landers' pitching staff, with their strong bullpen, that might not be the best solution, and so I've decided to bring in Travis Jackson and Bill Terry to provide some extra contact hitting to keep the Landers honest. It's not a perfect solution, as neither Jackson or Terry brings a lot besides singles (though Jackson has a decent glove), but I think it's the smart play.

2. Bullpens

The Landers have a bullpen.

The Macho Men don't have a bullpen.

That might be a problem for me...


GAME TIME!


: And I'm back for the 5th Commissar's Cup Challenge, which I won't be doing in full writeup form because that would kill me and I kind of want to live at least until the Blackhawks are eliminated from the playoffs.
: Well, that might be tough, the Landers are a good-
: I must break them!



: Macho Men win game 1, as my middle infield defensive catastrophe is not as bad as the Landers!
: Kind of a fluke, though.
: I'll take what I can get at this point.



: Hubbell, showing just what a left-handed pitcher with perfect control and a screwball can do!
: Not many pitchers like Hubbell in baseball history.
: And that is a shame! Other than the fact that Hubbell's use of the screwball eventually deformed his left arm.
: Deformed?
: Twisted the whole thing up, so that his hand was basically on backwards.
: I didn't know that could happen...



: And the Macho Men...only get two hits? gently caress! loving PEDRO! gently caress!
: Great effort by the Landers.
: Don't encourage them!



: Landers tie the series on a big win thanks to that crappy Cy Young I pinched from the Bombers...or Bronies...well, one of Bruzer's teams at any rate. How does Bruzer keep making my life difficult even after I've bounced him from the league for the fifth time?
: ...He's magic?
: I don't think he's magic.
: He might be magic. I mean, he keeps coming back in slightly different forms, just like the Doctor from Doctor Who.
: ...Never make that comparison again. Also, how the gently caress did we lose to Rick loving Reuschel? What the hell is that about? Why can't anything ever be easy?



: And Alexander shuts down the Landers because, as always, he is the best pitcher in Super-League history.
: Sometimes a pitcher is just too good to overcome.



: And the Landers tie the series at 3 games apiece, because Nolan Ryan is an rear end in a top hat!
: Oddly enough, Ryan only issued one walk, and yet still took the loss. That's unusual for him, as it's his wildness that usually leads to his self-destruction.



: Believe in the Hub.
: Wait, why did Bob Feller start?
: Quirk of Mogul? Besides, I had to start Bunning, and, historically speaking, he's a much worse pitcher than a prime Feller. And, besides, this is a battle to see which team is truly greater. We should have to go five-deep on our rotations!
: And the Macho Men are just one game away from winning this series and retiring the Landers.



: gently caress YOU, CY YOUNG! gently caress YOU, BRUZER! gently caress YOU, EVERYBODY!
: And we'll go to a Game 9. It will be Alexander for the Macho Men against Reuschel of the Landers.
: If Rick Reuschel beats Pete Alexander and kills the Macho Men, then I'm going to retire from life itself.



: MACHO MEN WIN! MACHO MEN WIN!
: Looks like the Macho Men finally got their revenge on Reuschel.
: drat straight we did. And I'm taking Joe DiMaggio as my prize! I have plans for him. Well, until next season...the Macho Men are officially better than your team. Deal with it!

Beet
Aug 24, 2003


:siren: Trade! :siren:

Somali Pirates send:
1946 Warren Spahn
1987 Frank Tanana
2006 Johann Santana
Pick #40

South Dakota Marmosets send:
1991 Rickey Henderson
Pick #34

Paul Zuvella
Dec 7, 2011

Another nail-biter series featuring the Macho Men. However, once again, Smasher proves he is smarter than all of us.

And hey, somehow I finished the comeback of the century and won the pick 'em. A good day, indeed.

Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope

Beet posted:



:siren: Trade! :siren:

Somali Pirates send:
1946 Warren Spahn
1987 Frank Tanana
2006 Johann Santana
Pick #40

South Dakota Marmosets send:
1991 Rickey Henderson
Pick #34

Trade Confirmed

mrnoun
Jul 24, 2007
The final blow delivered by the Macho Men was so mighty that it tore the moon itself asunder.

Well, not really, but it sounds cool, doesn't it?

The truth is, the only things destroyed by the colossal elbow drop that was the Macho Challenge were Moonbase 0-2 and its environs, and the Landers themselves. A big chunk of the moon, ripped from its home by the titanic force of Roy Campanella's grand slam, careened off into space. Clinging to the newly-formed asteroid were the remnants of the moonbase, and the surviving Landers.

"Well, that could have gone better," said mrnoun. "Anyone else survive?"

"It takes a lot more than an apocalyptic event that destroys a significant proportion of the moon to kill Josh Gibson!" said the eponymous catcher. "I think Pedro's still breathing, too."

"So, arguably the greatest hitter and greatest pitcher who ever lived? I guess we can build on that," said mrnoun. "Though that brings us to the next important question. What's that guy doing still here?"

"SUDDEN DEATH walks with us always," said Pedro, solemnly.

So the rebuilding began. Someday, perhaps, they would find a new home. But for now, this rock, The Moonchild, would have to do. And that is how they became...

The Galactic Wanderers!

Teams Selected:
1999 Toronto Blue Jays (3 pts)
1918 Chicago Cubs (4 pts)
1983 Los Angeles Dodgers (3 pts)

Logo Forthcoming

Home City: The Endless Depths of Space Itself! Artificial atmosphere replicates San Diego California, though.

Home Stadium: The Moonchild!
350-380-410-380-350

30-Man Roster:

C '?? Josh Gibson
C '18 Bob O'Farrell
C '?? SUDDEN DEATH
IF '18 Charlie Hollocher
IF '99 Alex Gonzalez
IF '99 Tony Batista
IF '83 Steve Sax
IF '99 Carlos Delgado
OF '83 Pedro Guerrero
OF '99 Shawn Green
OF '99 Jose Cruz Jr
OF '18 Les Mann
OF '83 Ken Landreaux
OF '99 Shannon Stewart
AAA '83 Mike Scioscia

P '99 Pedro Martinez
P '18 Pete Alexander
P '18 Hippo Vaughn
P '83 Fernando Valenzuela
P '83 Jerry Reuss
P '83 Alejandro Pena
P '83 Tom Niedenfuer
P '83 Dave Stewart
P '83 Steve Howe
P '99 Chris Carpenter
P '99 Roy Halladay
AAA '83 Orel Hershiser
AAA '99 Paul Quantrill
AAA '83 Bob Welch
AAA '18 Claude Hendrix

Lineups

C SUDDEN DEATH
1B Carlos Delgado
RF Pedro Guerrero
3B Josh Gibson
DH Shawn Green
2B Steve Sax
LF Shannon Stewart
CF Jose Cruz Jr
SS Charlie Hollocher

Pitching Rotation:

SP Pedro Martinez
SP Pete Alexander
SP Hippo Vaughn (PC: Bob O'Farrell)
SP Fernando Valenzuela
SP Roy Halladay
CL Alejandro Pena
SU Tom Niedenfuer
SR Steve Howe
SR Billy Koch
MR Dave Stewart
LR Jerry Reuss

Minors:
Darrin Fletcher
Orel Hershiser
Bob Welch
Claude Hendrix
Paul Quantrill

Strategy

Hit and Run: -5
Sacrifice Bunt: -5
Squeeze Play: -5
Trying for extra bases: 0
Stealing Bases: -5
Aggressively Tagging Up: 0
Pitch Outs (to prevent stolen bases): -5
Giving Intentional Walks: -5
Pitching Around Good Hitters: -2
Bringing the Infield In: 0
Guarding the Lines: 0
Making Cutoff Throws: 0
Bringing in Pinch Hitters: -2
Bringing in Pinch Runners: -4
Bringing in Defensive Replacements: 0
Starting Pitchers on Short Rest: -5
Letting pitchers pitch throw trouble: 0
Letting Pitchers rack up high pitch counts: -3


TRADE BAIT

We have a loving shitload of starting pitching. We are willing to move it for outfield help or draft picks.

Here are some samples:

'18 Cubs:
Phil Douglas
Lefty Tyler
Claude Hendrix

'83 Dodgers:
Bob Welch
Jerry Reuss
Orel Hershiser
Rick Honeycutt

'99 Jays:
David Wells
Pat Hentgen
Kelvim Escobar

We're also willing to talk about guys we're actually using, but the price will be much higher.

Beet
Aug 24, 2003


Also, let's get this party rolling again. With the 20th pick in the draft, the Somali Pirates claim the Mystery Box #1 that is theirs by right of conquest…

mentholmoose
Nov 5, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET
Have a link to the draft sheet: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0AkF311T6qtJidDZGRlVMQl9SNzV5NmZpbVl2cUo5bUE#gid=0

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Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.
I still want to trade for a draft pick at this point, please grab me in IRC. I've got some pitching and some outfielders to spare and am happy to negotiate.

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