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Gounads posted:Doesn't sound like the kind of boss I'd want to work for. Yea that's what I'm thinking. I just sent the recruiter a short note asking if he has the right phone number (I'm sure he does), then said perhaps we should consider other jobs she has open.
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May 21, 2013 18:33
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Sab669 posted:as they primarily work with Sharepoint You don't want that job anyways.
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May 21, 2013 19:08
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Yea like I said, Sharepoint speaks for itself  I had to teach myself it and set up a very basic site for an internship a year ago and even that was miserable, let alone actual development for it. But still. Dolla dolla bills. I'm laughably underpaid as is and at this point will settle for almost anything.
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May 21, 2013 19:33
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illest alive fucked around with this message at 09:44 on Oct 29, 2014 |
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May 21, 2013 19:47
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Holy cow your resume should not be 3 pages. -Scrap the Summary, that's what your cover letter is. -Keep your skills short and sweet, technical only. An "out going personality" is not a skill; they will detect if you're a basement dwelling turbo nerd from a phone interview. I'd say probably keep this under 5 bullets; 1 for your programming / scripting languages, 1 for your database skills, 1 for your IDEs and then anything else out of the orindary. Maybe split up your languages into desktop and web environments or mobile. -Scrap the "Favorite classes" of your eduction, they only care if you have a degree. Some might say a 3.22 isn't good enough (no offense! That's better than mine was) to bother mentioning. I personally wouldn't list anything under a 3.7 -Either shorten your Experience section (don't need to be so detailed with every aspect of your job) and or completely remove the last 3 roles. -Definitely get rid of the hobbies. It's good to show you enjoy programming / learning, but putting it on the third page of your resume is not where you want to show it. edit; Is your email really <deleted>? You should probably get something more professional sounding. Somebody fucked around with this message at 17:45 on Oct 25, 2014 |
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May 21, 2013 19:57
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If I was hiring and your resume came across my desk I would stop reading it before I even got halfway through your Skills section. 3 pages is way too long, and a skills section that at a glance takes up half of a page screams "lol resume filler bullshit" (even if it's not). edit: At least in my opinion, any "skills" that you list should be technologies you know well and could answer a handful of on the spot questions about during an interview. Stuff that you have heard of but never really used does not belong there. If all the stuff you have listed after "familiar with" means you might have written Hello World! in that language once, you should remove it. Also poo poo like "Passionate about writing good documentation, comprehensive test cases, fixing naming conventions, and generally maintaining best practices" is really dumb, and not really a skill. If you really want to you can put that kind of stuff in a cover letter, but honestly that's also the kind of poo poo that I would filter out if I was screening a prospective candidate as well. astr0man fucked around with this message at 20:16 on May 21, 2013 |
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May 21, 2013 20:01
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I literally opened the link, saw it, and closed it without reading your resume. It's just a huge wall of words. I suggest the resume to interview people from SA Mart to help you out.
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May 21, 2013 20:06
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illest alive posted:I got out of school about a year ago, was picked up pretty quickly by a headhunter, contract ended, decided i don't really like contract work anyway, and am now trying to actually find a job on my own with a little bit of difficulty. My resume is at 2 pages (with a little extra for personality) and one of my friends, who went to a school that provides decent job hunting resouces, recently told me that there is no way an employer will even consider me if my resume is over a page. How accurate is this? Not accurate at all. But you should shorten your resume. And that was assuming it was 2 pages. But it's 3 pages. illest alive posted:<deleted> Your resume is full of bullshit. The main thing employers want to know is: CAN YOU loving CODE? (and not be a spergacious buttlord). Let's start off with: quote:I am an experienced and flexible programmer with a great ability for learning new languages, frameworks, and Bullshit bullshit bullshit. If you're experienced, your experience will speak for itself. And anybody can claim to be flexible, a good learner, etc. Nobody cares what you say. They want to see what you've done. quote:standards. I am passionate about writing efficient, reusable, and well documented code. I gain immense satisfaction from finding inductive solutions to every day problems and from squeezing every drop of efficiency out of an What in the flying name of gently caress is an "inductive solution" to an every day problem? Nobody gives a poo poo how passionate you claim to be, because it's a claim, and nobody believes it. (a) Knowing the meaning of the word "inductive" is not impressive. (b) Dropping it in an inappropriate place is not impressive. (c) You don't know the meaning of the word "inductive". quote:• Deep understanding of a wide variety of language paradigms and of their underlying implementational details and related concepts. These include memory allocation, type handling, parsers, and interpreters in various object-oriented, functional, logical, query, imperative, and declarative languages Tell me more about your deep (probably typical) understanding of memory allocation! Tell me more about your deep understanding of... type handling?? Tell me more about your deep understanding of... related concepts? Does that include a deep understanding of your own butthole? That's what I'm thinking, reading this. quote:• Able to learn new skills, techniques, languages, and frameworks very quickly More airy bullshit, and just because I skipped the other lines doesn't mean they aren't too, I just don't have time to go line-by-line. And it's not true that you're able to learn very quickly, because if it were, you wouldn't have a 3.22 GPA. I mean a 3.22 Major GPA. quote:• Extensive experience using and troubleshooting Mac OS and good ability with Unix-based and Windows systems So you can use computers? You're applying for a developer position and you're saying you can use computers. quote:EDUCATION Nobody cares about your education or your lovely GPA from some no-name school in Connecticut. All they care is that you got a degree, and they aren't going to be impressed by that upfront. Put it at or near the end. Experience goes first. And nobody cares what your favorite coursework is. quote:EXPERIENCE Every section describing experience is too long, but disproportionately too short compared to other sections of the resume. We don't need 3 bullet points about your TA experience. You were a TA. We get it. There's nothing interesting to say about what you did as a TA. quote:• Aided professor in instruction of students, No poo poo? As a TA? Really!? quote:primarily first time programmers, In an introduction to CS class? No way! quote:• Imparted an understanding of concepts underlying modern programming languages including object orientation, recursion, and algorithm efficiency, and variable typing Let's rephrase that: • Taught about the poo poo in the Intro CS curriculum. See how you're being too verbose? But we can trim that down further: • You see, nobody needs to be told that you taught the intro CS curriculum as a TA for Intro to CS. quote:• Wrote bash algorithms to mass compile, test, and output errors of weekly assignments. Then performed code review and gave constructive comments You're not being maximally succinct. You could say "scripts" instead of "algorithms". Don't use words that sound "impressive". Maybe they sound impressive to somebody with a 3.22 in-major GPA, I don't know. "Used bash to mass compile, test, and output errors of assignments. Gave personal feedback on students' code." See how that's shorter? But you can make it even shorter! "Used bash to automatically compile and test assignments. Then gave personal feedback." But you can make it even shorter than that! It's a good thing that you explicitly mention the use of bash. quote:LEADERSHIP 9 lines on your resume devoted to the fact that you were in a fraternity. Yep, if you can't get trim this down to one page there's probably something wrong with you. Edit: Note that I generally respond to other people's resumes (and claims of competence, and anything people might say good about themselves) with hatred and disgust. You are not a bad person. Don't kill yourself, please. Consider my reaction to be the worst possible scenario and design your resume around that. Somebody fucked around with this message at 17:45 on Oct 25, 2014 |
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May 21, 2013 20:14
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^^Yikes, I know he said tear into him, but wow haha. While we're tearing apart resumes;  I really don't like my Skills section, I think it looks too long and empty, but if I condense it then the there's a decent chunk of white space at the bottom. I also don't like just saying "Current" for my employment periods but I find that if I change the formatting at all, Office fucks poo poo up. Scribbled out bits are obviously name / phone / email (which is just my name), then I scribbled out the company names. Also, I was an intern for 5 months before I was a full time developer at the top-most Experience entry. Should I include that in my time there? ie. "05/12 - Present" or "10/12 - Present". My duties were exactly the same as an intern as they are now. Sab669 fucked around with this message at 20:26 on May 21, 2013 |
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May 21, 2013 20:20
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illest alive posted:I got out of school about a year ago, was picked up pretty quickly by a headhunter, contract ended, decided i don't really like contract work anyway, and am now trying to actually find a job on my own with a little bit of difficulty. My resume is at 2 pages (with a little extra for personality) and one of my friends, who went to a school that provides decent job hunting resouces, recently told me that there is no way an employer will even consider me if my resume is over a page. How accurate is this? How worried do I need to be? And how should I shorten my resume (if it needs it)? I know that there are some definitely unnecessary parts, like hobbies, but I feel like things like this set me apart from the crowd and add a human element to my resume. Please feel free to tear me a new one! I came back to school and have 10 years of relevant job experience. I go to the most recruited school in the country. My resume is 1 page. No bullshit about 'relevant courses' , hobbies or passions. Just succinct explanation of what I've done/achieved that is relevant to what I want to do in the future and that demonstrates my ability to perform in the jobs I'm trying to get. It has served me well. 1 page. Anything more is cruft. Somebody fucked around with this message at 17:45 on Oct 25, 2014 |
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May 21, 2013 20:22
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Sab669 posted:I was told that their head of software dev would call me X time yesterday, Y time today. Phone never rang, no voicemail or anything. Contacted the recruiter 30 minutes after the first time yesterday and she said she'd speak with him and find out what's up. Then she emailed me later yesterday to re-schedule for today, same thing. No call or anything.
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May 21, 2013 20:28
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I see what you're saying, but I also don't want to "push" immediately because I don't expect my phone to ring at exactly 8:30 or 12:15, people get stuck in traffic, caught up around lunch time, etc. On one hand, it seems impatient, on the other, I need a job so I see what you mean.
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May 21, 2013 20:30
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Sab669 posted:^^Yikes, I know he said tear into him, but wow haha. Put your skills in a 2 column table, so they're side-by-side. Your formatting throughout kind of irks me, you could stand to benefit with a better template. Also use past tense everywhere, especially don't mix tenses, as you have, and use bullet points where you're clearly bulleting your experiences.
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May 21, 2013 20:33
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Sab669 posted:Also, I was an intern for 5 months before I was a full time developer at the top-most Experience entry. Should I include that in my time there? It's up to you. Some poeple recommend including stuff like that, and full title promotions to show your progress within a company.
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May 21, 2013 20:33
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Sarcophallus posted:Put your skills in a 2 column table, so they're side-by-side. As far as mixing tenses goes, I'm no English major but I think I used present tense throughout my 'Present job', then past tense through all my past experiences. Seems logical to me?
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May 21, 2013 20:37
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I had to read a resume for a phone screen last month that was 10 pages.
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May 21, 2013 20:37
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Had to read, or came across it while reading resumes, laughed, showed it to a coworker and then used it for kindling?
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May 21, 2013 20:54
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Sab669 posted:As far as mixing tenses goes, I'm no English major but I think I used present tense throughout my 'Present job', then past tense through all my past experiences. Seems logical to me? Always past tense on a resume, present job or not. When I said mixing tenses I meant using both present and past under one heading.
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May 21, 2013 20:59
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Sab669 posted:Had to read, or came across it while reading resumes, laughed, showed it to a coworker and then used it for kindling? Boss gave it to me 90 minutes ahead of time and said 'can you phone screen this guy'.
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May 21, 2013 21:04
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Sarcophallus posted:Always past tense on a resume, present job or not. When I said mixing tenses I meant using both present and past under one heading. Where? Like I said, English isn't my strongest point, definitely not seeing what you're talking about  fritz posted:Boss gave it to me 90 minutes ahead of time and said 'can you phone screen this guy'.  That's pretty hosed up.
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May 21, 2013 21:09
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Sab669 posted:I see what you're saying, but I also don't want to "push" immediately because I don't expect my phone to ring at exactly 8:30 or 12:15, people get stuck in traffic, caught up around lunch time, etc. On one hand, it seems impatient, on the other, I need a job so I see what you mean. I was in this position not that long ago and I waited 5-10 minutes before calling the person who arranged the call. The person (supposedly?) had a meeting run long and within another minute or two gave me a call. I agree with not waiting 30 minutes but definitely give 5-10 as a courtesy for other things. fritz posted:I had to read a resume for a phone screen last month that was 10 pages.
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May 21, 2013 21:09
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We've been interviewing heavily since early February or so, and have hired one (1) person, not counting two, possibly three, people that we hired but couldn't get visas for.
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May 21, 2013 21:10
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No Safe Word posted:Same guy who had the "I'm not looking for a job, I'm looking for an adventure" cover letter also had a 15 page resume with no position being longer than 6 months. I'm sad he even got to the in-person part. We had a guy come in for an 'informal interview' who kept telling us about his current company that he was selling for tons of money and even asked 'you're probably wondering why someone like me would want to work for your company.' No Safe Word posted:I was in this position not that long ago and I waited 5-10 minutes before calling the person who arranged the call. The person (supposedly?) had a meeting run long and within another minute or two gave me a call. I agree with not waiting 30 minutes but definitely give 5-10 as a courtesy for other things. We get people showing up late for in-person interviews on the regular, but as long as it's not too horrible or they call and say they'll be late I don't mind, but the ones that rile me up are the ones that cancel at the last minute or don't show at all. fritz fucked around with this message at 21:15 on May 21, 2013 |
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May 21, 2013 21:12
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shrughes posted:More airy bullshit, and just because I skipped the other lines doesn't mean they aren't too, I just don't have time to go line-by-line. And it's not true that you're able to learn very quickly, because if it were, you wouldn't have a 3.22 GPA. I mean a 3.22 Major GPA. Everything you said was pretty much accurate except for calling the school no-name. To be fair, Wesleyan is a top 20 liberal arts school. That said a 3.22 Major GPA (which means the regular GPA is lower) is awful and should most definitely not be listed on a resume.
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May 21, 2013 21:15
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Sab669 posted:
You want to know what else is hosed up. It was for a position that we're advertising but not actually hiring for, boss's goal is to get people interested in position X and say 'well we really want you for position Y, are you still interested'. I didn't find that out until after I screened that guy for position X, and he was my third X phone screen of the week.
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May 21, 2013 21:17
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Sounds like a great place to work  I'm underpaid but at least the office is bullshit free (aside of standard customer interactions)
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May 21, 2013 21:20
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Ochowie posted:Everything you said was pretty much accurate except for calling the school no-name. To be fair, Wesleyan is a top 20 liberal arts school. That said a 3.22 Major GPA (which means the regular GPA is lower) is awful and should most definitely not be listed on a resume. In my experience I've also never had anybody care about my GPA. It's lovely, albeit from a decent school. There's almost an unwritten rule that if you have a lovely or average GPA, don't write it and nobody will ask, and if you have a phenomenal GPA, sure go ahead, it doesn't hurt.
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May 21, 2013 23:50
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Just curious, what would you consider phenomenal? 4.1?
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May 22, 2013 00:20
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Well, just to give you context, I think I got something like 3.1/4.0 at UIUC (got absolutely demolished, in other words), and I never put that on a resume just to be on the safe side. On the other hand, I got 4.16/4.33 at my MS at CMU and I make sure that's visible where possible. Why not milk it, right?
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May 22, 2013 00:27
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Ah. Yeah I was just on the fence about mine. Didn't know GPAs were out of anything other than 4.0 at the college level, hence the .
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May 22, 2013 00:29
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I don't think I've even noticed a gpa on a resume, but if you stuck around and got a master's you'd better believe I'm going to grill you about it.
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May 22, 2013 00:37
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fritz posted:I don't think I've even noticed a gpa on a resume, but if you stuck around and got a master's you'd better believe I'm going to grill you about it. What's funny is that many years ago a skip level of mine gave me a super hard time about wanting to get a graduate degree with the following justification: "Do you really want to get a MS? Do you realize that your interview questions are going to be a lot harder if you get one?? How will you ever find a job again?" Er.. ok. Gotta love people who live their lives in fear.
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May 22, 2013 00:41
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The best advice I ever got regarding my resume was back in school when I was applying for internships. I applied to a large company and their HR person called me up a couple of weeks later to say that they liked my application, but there was no way she was going to pass a two and a half page resume (mine) on to the technical people, because college kids were expected to have "three quarters to a whole page" and people with 10 years experience were allowed two. I thought really hard about what was important and eliminated the rest and that revised one got me an interview and an offer. As it turned out their offer was laughably awful, but I've been doing one-pagers ever since and I've had way more responses.
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May 22, 2013 01:00
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DreadCthulhu posted:What's funny is that many years ago a skip level of mine gave me a super hard time about wanting to get a graduate degree with the following justification: "Do you really want to get a MS? Do you realize that your interview questions are going to be a lot harder if you get one?? How will you ever find a job again?" Most of the people I interview with just a master's have been disappointments, do CS departments just hand them out like candy? (phds are a different story)
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May 22, 2013 01:08
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The only people with a master's worth considering are those who got them sort of in a 4-year or 5-year combo with their undergraduate degree. Everybody else is people who were like, "I know what I'm going to do, I'm going to get a master's in CS." Which is bad.
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May 22, 2013 01:14
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fritz posted:Most of the people I interview with just a master's have been disappointments, do CS departments just hand them out like candy? (phds are a different story) I don't have experience with traditional-style CS MS since CMU only offers Software Engineering MS targeted mostly towards people with a few years of industry experience, which is a completely different story from the "I just finished my BS" crowd. The program is basically about educating team leads / technical directors / architects, with 0 focus on algorithms, cs theory etc. I honestly don't see much of a difference between people who did their MS right after a BS and people who are fresh out of 4 year college: neither have any sort of real hands-on experience as software developers, which is 99% a craft that's honed through experience and practice, not CS theory. Nothing against theory btw, it's just that it doesn't help you up-front if you're just going to be a CRUD-monkey at a big company. Having said that, a good 70% were pretty unimpressive, mostly the foreign crowd dreaming of being a middle manager at BigCorp for the rest of their lives. All were MS, Amazon, Google, Apple, Oracle, Ebay employees etc. A couple were good, a couple pretty great. The most impressive guy I knew was a dude who never got a CS degree, never worked at a big software company, and had pretty much taught himself how to program on the side for a couple of years. Could run circles around everybody else. DreadCthulhu fucked around with this message at 01:26 on May 22, 2013 |
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May 22, 2013 01:22
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I have to either get into a masters program or get a job to extend my stay in the US (mandatory military service gets shorter the more you study/work abroad). You need to have at least a 3.5 GPA to co-term here and I have a 3.15 (Sophomore) so I'll see I guess.
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May 22, 2013 01:23
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fritz posted:Most of the people I interview with just a master's have been disappointments, do CS departments just hand them out like candy? (phds are a different story) I know of at least one pretty well known CS department that gives you a master's for just one more year of classes after undergrad. From what I've heard of the graduates, these classes are mostly project based and basically what you'd get from work experience anyways.
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May 22, 2013 01:55
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fritz posted:Most of the people I interview with just a master's have been disappointments, do CS departments just hand them out like candy? (phds are a different story) I'm not in a CS program but in many departments the Masters can be a 'consolation prize' for people who chose not to finish the PhD. I'd imagine there are pretty big differences between people who set out to get a Masters and people who were asked to leave with one.
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May 22, 2013 02:00
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2banks1swap.avi posted:So my current part time job puts me, the newblet, in a position to call a Sr Dev 400 miles away and a web guy about 20 miles away - both with their own full time jobs - to get them together after hours to start working on a website I still don't have access to. To make things particularly fun, I was basically bedridden the last goddamn week and didn't even get up out of bed to do more than drink soup or stand in a hot shower and clear my sinuses, so then the super awesome, zero-micromanagement boss asks ME for a status report. You have a very verbose, goony style that makes it hard to read through the whole post let alone offer advice.
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May 22, 2013 02:08
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