Scuzzywuffit posted:

And ironically, a Facebook page entitled "Dude...I was there.... don't try to change the story." posts some STDH, albeit from another source:

Scuzzywuffit posted:

And ironically, a Facebook page entitled "Dude...I was there.... don't try to change the story." posts some STDH, albeit from another source:

Samfucius posted:

I had a SDTH-seed happen to me yesterday at work. Let's see how it really happened versus how it would be written:

I work in retail in a city that has banned plastic bags and mandated that businesses charge $0.05 for paper bags. This went into effect a couple months ago, and most people have adjusted. I actually like it, as there is less trash on the streets, but that is neither here nor there. My managers have told me that we HAVE to follow the law as well.

Some people really, really, really don't like it. I had a man come in to buy about $40 worth of socks and underwear. He gets to the counter and I ask him if he would like a bag. He says yes, so I inform him that I'm going to have to add a nickel onto the charge. He stops, looks me in the eye and says something like "Well, nevermind then. That's ridiculous." I ask him something like "Nevermind on the bag? Ok, sir." and he responds with "Nevermind on the whole thing. I don't want any of this unless you give me a bag."

I swear to loving god on everything that is holy he said that.

I try to tell him that I can't; it's a city law, my managers are strict about it, it isn't up to me, etc. He is just getting angrier and angrier. At one point he tells me it is my choice, and I am choosing to lose his business. Then he demands I call my manager. I try, but my manager must be busy because he doesn't answer the phone. At this point an older lady behind the customer walks up to him and tries to hand him a nickel, saying "I'll pay for your stupid bag. You're being rude, leave this guy alone, he's just doing his job."

Once again, I swear on anything you would like me to that I am making none of this up.

The angry guy refuses the nickel, and starts to get a little flustered. He leaves his stuff on the counter and walks off. The lady apologizes on behalf of the angry dude and we have a good laugh. I'm about to give her a small discount because she was awesome and I am totally allowed to do that when angry dude storms back over, grabs his stuff, and leaves without a word to another cashier, where he starts the whole thing over. This cashier manages to get a hold of our manager, who is a super nice, relaxed guy. After a long, protracted argument during which the customer threatens to cut up his loyalty account card (accounts are a huge deal at the store) my manager gives the customer a free bag and tells him that he is going to talk to me about my "rude behavior". This talk consists of him coming over, laughing about how loving nuts that guy's tantrum was, and telling me in the future to just give crazy people their free bags and to call him to talk to them.


In STDH land:

I work at a large department store as a sales associate. We have to charge $0.05 for bags because of a city ordinance.

Yesterday a man came in to buy some clothes. When he got to the register and learned that he was expected to pay for a bag if he wanted one, he went berserk.
"YOU SHOULD BE FIRED FOR THIS YOUNG MAN, CALL YOUR SUPERVISOR! I REFUSE TO BE TREATED THIS WAY!"
At this point the gorgeous woman behind the customer had had enough, and tried to hand him a nickel, which he hit out of her hand. Then, ranting and raving, he walked away.
"I am so sorry you had to deal with that," she said. "Do you want to get dinner later?"
"I would love to, and by the way, your whole purchase is free."
She giggled and leaned over the counter, clearly showing off her ample busom.
"I have something for you too... here's my number, call me later."
"Magnifico!" I said under my breath. She must have heard me, because on her way out out of the store I heard her singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Then I overheard the crazy customer talking to my supervisor,
"I REFUSE TO BE ROBBED BY THAT HORRIBLE CASHIER. I BET HE LIKES MEN, AND I DON'T WANT A DEGENERATE TOUCHING MY UNDERWEAR ANYWAYS!"
"Sir, the city bag ordinance has been in effect for months, there is nothing I can do about it. Samfucius is one of our best associates, and I'd rather he be here than you. Get out!"
At that point my manager came over and gave me a high five and a raise for dealing with the crazy customer.
I married the beautiful woman a month later.

CJacobs posted:

That's not STDH, that's called a joke.

Serperoth posted:

I'll agree with CJacobs, it's a joke. Fairly original too, or at least I hadn't heard it before.
The e-card thing is pretty dumb by itself, but I'll take a badly-formatted joke over passive-aggressive "I'm sorry did my back hurt your knife?" poo poo any day of the week.

Hoover Dam posted:

This is an amazing extended story of a guy whose entire life is STDH.

RenegadeStyle1 posted:

I would think something like this would have gotten a lot more media attention.

Hoover Dam posted:

This is an amazing extended story of a guy whose entire life is STDH.

Scuzzywuffit posted:

And ironically, a Facebook page entitled "Dude...I was there.... don't try to change the story." posts some STDH, albeit from another source:

Hoover Dam posted:

This is an amazing extended story of a guy whose entire life is STDH.

CJacobs posted:

For the 0 people that care, the guy who was whoring for upvotes on Imgur saying that his boss would give him a raise if he got to the front page... actually got the raise!



So... I guess that poo poo possibly did happen!

change my name posted:

There's no date on that.

Morozko posted:

Only kid that could write
Implying that her dad didn't actually sent her rear end to time out for doing so

DrHerpington posted:

Dean of Swing posted:

The best part is smug Disney.

Djeser posted:

90% of tumblr:
-dude did you also participate in pop culture?
-heh yeah

tumblr posted:

in my social studies class we were talking about laws and poo poo and one boy goes “Why is rape illegal? Don’t girls like dominance?” and the smallest girl in class got up and socked him in the jaw and said “Shouldn’t you like that? Don’t you like acting tough?” and everyone got quiet for a second and then slow clapped it out for her

Vicas posted:

The other 10% is

-sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who participated in pop culture

Also social justice warriors

quote:

Hello!! I’d like to share a story that happened a couple years back at a convention called J-Con.

At this point in time, I liked anime but I wasn’t really into any fandoms particularly. ( I Just liked anime here and there y’know) So, I didn’t want to cosplay anyone and just decided to go in my maid outfit I wore for Halloween, along with some cat ears and tail. (I just wanted to dress up!) Anyway, My group of friends and I (there were 5 of us.) are waiting in line to buy our con tickets and we’re almost to the front of the line when this guy taps me on my shoulder, I turn and look up at him.

I’m only about 5’3 and this guy was around 6’4, he had short blonde hair that was spiked up, about medium build and wearing a long leather trench coat. He tells me that I look very adorable and asks for a hug. While I got a very creepy vibe from him, I wasn’t one to turn down someone when they ask for a hug, so I did and he squeezed me very tight against him, it was very uncomfortable. Luckily it was my turn to buy my ticket so I had an excuse to get out of there! Everything goes well for the first couple of hours, I had gotten separated from my little group of friends in the dealer room, which was fine!

I was having fun taking pictures of cosplayers and exploring the convention center when all of a sudden I feel two hands grasp my waist and I’m hoisted up and carried bridal style by, guess who, none other than Trench coat guy. I’m very confused and dazed and most of all scared. I’m a timid person and surprising me like that really shook me up, I was trying not to cry. He carried me over to a couch where his friends were, he sat down and placed me in his lap and his friends start putting their hands on my legs and he tells me how “Kawaii” I am and by this point I’m horrified and i can feel tears beginning to slip out which mortifies me even more.

I end up tumbling (Literally) off the couch and quickly scramble to get to my feet, the guy questions me and I just yell while I’m running away that my friends are calling me. I went to the bathroom to calm down a bit before calling my friends to come get me in the bathroom since I was too afraid to come out again, they come and I tell them the story and they make sure one of them is with me at all times. Needles to say I never wondered away from my friends again!

quote:

Me: Tats

Boyfriend: Shishi

Weeb: Crayon

TL;DR - Crazy neon weeb molests my boyfriend and sexually assults me infront of a crowd of people.

Okay, so growing up I did have a weeb phase in my 5th and 6th school year, but I was never the “are you ready to accept animu as your lord and saviour” type, just a few buttons with my favourite Bleach characters and the like on my bag, read manga in the library, that sort of thing. Thankfully I grew out of it by the end of primary school (6th year) and into secondary school. I still like the stuff, but am more obsessed with K-Pop now (I’m still only in my 12th year).

Now, this might be odd to say but it pertains to the story: I’m a fairly muscular girl because I play cricket and softball so I’m not uber thin, but have a healthy body type, and am only 165cm (about 5’ 6”). My breasts on the other hand are a 36G and this is something that gets me ogled at nearly everyday; it doesn’t help that I like tighter clothing and low neck shirts either, but since I tend to flaunt my cleavage I don’t complain about the looks.

Anyway, around the summer between my 10th year and 11th year of school, I started dating a very nice older Korean boy I had known from many of my classes the previous year. We hit off right away (and are still together), so we decided to go to the upcoming con dressed as two of the mascots of our favourite K-Pop group B.A.P; he was Shishimato, I was Tatsmato and we both wore hoodies and masks we made ourselves with black army boots and black rabbit ears (feel free to look these two up to get it).

The con rolls around and we go and have a great time. People stop Shishi and I to say how cute we are and ask for pictures which we gladly posed for. We even kissed for many of the shippers. Shishi bought me a great many of things and I did the same for him and we were having an amazing time. About four hours in my feet are starting to hurt from the new boots so I sit down to rest and Shishi runs off to grab us some bubble tea from a vendor nearby.

This was where I saw Crayon. She was the typical Asian-pop raver kind with a J-Rock tank top she cut herself, black lacy tutu, white fishnets, furry boots, and about 100+ jelly bracelets. Her makeup made her look like a raccoon with way too much eyeliner and her hair was so greasy it was practically sticking to her face and neck. She wasn’t a hambeast, but she was overweight to the point her stomach stuck out and her thighs were a little on the jello-side. She was also wearing rabbit ears but they were the crummy store bought Easter kind that kids got then threw out.

I guess she though that my wearing ears too was an overwhelming coincidence because the moment she saw me she screeched and stormed over before throwing her arms around my neck in an attempted glomp; even through my mask I could tell she hadn’t showered in at least a week and I almost gagged. “OH EM GHEE, USAGI-CHAN IS KAWAII DESU.” She kept screaming this and shoving her face in my neck. She kept asking if she could touch my hair and as much as I didn’t want her to, I said yes. She started petting me, and at this point people were staring. She kept breathing on my face and telling me how pretty I was and that she wanted to take me home and would keep me in a cage and never let me go…

What?

Around this time Shishi came back and could probably tell I was very distressed because this girl had gotten me on my knees and was spewing a bunch of random Japanese phrases and calling me “her little bunny” and making a lot of lewd claims pertaining to Playboy that were making me insanely uncomfortable. When Shishi walks up, she starts screeching again and lets go of me to latch on to him. She starts rubbing her chest on his arm and groping his hair all the while making noises that I think were supposed to be words. Then, out of nowhere, she grabs his cheeks in her slimy little hands and pulls him down forcefully, and begins kissing him. loving KISSING HIM.

I CAN SEE HER LICKING HIS MOUTH.

Now, I’m not the jealous type, but this pissed me the gently caress off to the point that I grabbed her arm and pulled her away from my visibly shaken boyfriend (who has dropped our bubble teas), telling her that it was my boyfriend and that she was being completely inappropriate and that I wanted her to leave me alone.

This pissed Crayon off and she started telling me that a “bitch like me didn’t deserve this hawt Japanese bishie of a man” (no matter how many times we explained he was Korean) and how she could “make his uke side come out every night, neh”.

A crowd was really gathering now to watch this drama and it was very humiliating as she kept calling me a “rounded eyed bitch” and and “Communist American whore” even though I have an OBVIOUS Cockney accent and she is in no way Asian.

Then the real clincher.

Crayon, in a fit of weeb rage and strength, grabs the top of my hoodie and wrenches it down, ripping the neckline straight open. If this wasn’t enough, she pulled my bra down at the same time, exposing my breasts to everybody. Shishi, being the kind of guy to never raise a hand to a woman, went to get security a while ago, and they all happen back at the same time as this incident.

I’m too embarrassed to be able to do anything, so I just ended up on the floor sobbing in embarrassment and horror as Crayon is forcefully restrained by security, all the while screaming I should get kicked out because I’m trying to keep “her hawt Nippon lover” from being with her and claiming I’m a whore because of my breast size. Shishi covers me up with his hoodie and takes me to the hotel we were staying at together.

Crayon is banned for life and we press charges, ending in us winning and Crayon in juvie hall. Her parents sent me £400 (about 600$) for my next birthday and the University the con was held at gave Shishi and I free passes for the next year.

Needless to say, we didn’t go.

wikipedia posted:

Kawaii (かわいい [kaw͍aiꜜi], "lovable", "cute", or "adorable"[1]) is the quality of cuteness in the context of Japanese culture.[2][3][4] It has become a prominent aspect of Japanese popular culture, entertainment, clothing, food, toys, personal appearance, behavior, and mannerisms.[5] The noun is kawaisa (可愛さ?), literally, "lovability", "cuteness" or "adorableness".

The root word is "kawai", formed from the kanji "ka" (可), meaning "acceptable", and "ai" (愛), meaning "love". The term kawaii has taken on the secondary meanings of "cool",[6] "groovy",[6] "acceptable",[7] "desirable",[7] "charming"[8] "non-threatening",[8] and "innocence".[9]

Jerry Manderbilt posted:

Yeah, I can see the dude being creepy to her, but then calling her "kawaii" and poo poo sounds like a stretch.

Jerry Manderbilt posted:

Yeah, I can see the dude being creepy to her, but then calling her "kawaii" and poo poo sounds like a stretch.

eating only apples posted:

Weeaboostories is all entirely ridiculous fabrication and/or embellishment, it's cringeworthy but I still read it all

moerketid posted:

I've been to literally dozens of conventions. The kawaii bit, maybe, but the "carrying off" sounds like utter bs because at any con you would be thrown out as soon as the person reported you to security, or perhaps even arrested.

Leopold N. Loeb posted:

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3503700&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=715

But upon inspection, the whole thing appears to be a multi-level marketing scam.

Leopold N. Loeb posted:

Seriously, though, I don't know what's worse- that this type of material is being promoted on SA(remember when we used to attack sites like reddit for stuff like that?), or that a MLM scam seems to have set up shop here. On the bright side, the STDH is delicious. Silver linings, I guess....

NoUU posted:

I don't know anything about this thread but some of those posts really sound like a guy in a commercial at 3am telling me how I can make easy money.

Also what the gently caress why is does this exist here.

DrHerpington posted:

Ugh. I'm someone that participates in that thread.

It's around because there was an Ask/Tell thread about it by Delilah Fawkes. Then, because it became less Ask/Tell and more "Teach me how to write smut", it became its own thread.

Right now, it's my main source of income. Like anything porn related, if you stick to it, you can make a good amount. Not great, but I'm making a minimum $500/month. It still requires me to do stuff like make covers and actually write stuff. Some of the grosser genres sell more. For instance, monsters sell pretty well, so does "dubious consent" (rape), "pseudo incest" (step siblings, technically, but that's just a disclaimer), lactation, breeding, and basically, all the grosser stuff. It's not romance novel stuff.

Any stats like "75k" usually refer to word count, not dollars. So, for instance, right now, my month's word count is somewhere around 15k, but that doesn't mean I made $15,000. It just means I wrote around 15,000 words.

Leopold N. Loeb posted:

Can you confirm or deny that there is some kind of MLM thing going on here? Everyone's talking about smutbux, the pep talk vibe is palpable, and "self-publishing" MLMs are one of the most common form of MLM right now. So, this all seems a bit....fishy.

edit: Lacertine is not claiming 80k words a month, but 80 thousand bucks. What's the over/under on him being full of poo poo? Or are those Smutbux(TM)?