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Fuego Fish posted:Remember the time he wrote about that plot to make Nightcrawler the new Pope so they could fake the Rapture with communion wafers that vaporized people? Even though the Catholic church, like most denominations, doesn't believe in the idea of the Rapture. Or the time that he had Jubilee talk about how much she regrets not having sex while standing on his misspelled grave? Also Draco. Just fucken Draco.
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Jun 15, 2013 04:04
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bobkatt013 posted:This is Chuck Austen we are talking about. This only barely makes the top ten stupidest things he did in x-men if it even makes it. Someone please write that top ten list. I would, but I don't want to reread it all.
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Jun 15, 2013 04:04
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To be fair if you're a mutant with super-healing (which I assume that he was if his blood healed her) then it makes sense he can't. Also that man should be donating blood constantly.
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Jun 15, 2013 04:22
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MikeJF posted:To be fair No.
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Jun 15, 2013 04:31
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bobkatt013 posted:Or the time that he had Jubilee talk about how much she regrets not having sex while standing on his misspelled grave?  anybody got an issue # for this?
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Jun 15, 2013 04:49
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ghosthorse posted:
Uncanny 427. Same issue as the AIDS poo poo. Its a lot worse then I remember 
bobkatt013 fucked around with this message at 04:59 on Jun 15, 2013 |
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Jun 15, 2013 04:57
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bobkatt013 posted:Uncanny 427. Same issue as the AIDS poo poo. The dialog isn't that bad. Just two friends shooting the poo poo over relationships. Then I realized they were at a loving graveyard
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Jun 15, 2013 05:02
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Unlucky7 posted:The dialog isn't that bad. Just two friends shooting the poo poo over relationships. Angelo's grave, specifically. She's commiserating about not boning the guy who's rotting six feet under her. That's the big thing she's wishes she could have back, not, you know, his death...
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Jun 15, 2013 05:08
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Remember when everyone was trying to convince themselves that Chuck Austen was going to turn into a good writer... any time now? I remember people saying that his run on Action Comics was him "finding his character," and man, the second the husband-and-wife supervillains called Sodom and Gamorrah showed up I was going "really."
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Jun 15, 2013 05:09
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Fuego Fish posted:Remember the time he wrote about that plot to make Nightcrawler the new Pope so they could fake the Rapture with communion wafers that vaporized people? Even though the Catholic church, like most denominations, doesn't believe in the idea of the Rapture.
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Jun 15, 2013 05:28
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Is Chuck Austen the guy who wrote Worldwatch? The comic that was basically,"What if the Authority's take on the JLA had no redeeming features whatsoever?"
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Jun 15, 2013 05:51
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Does somebody have the "I'm Chucky Austen, I've taken your favorite comics and replaced them with shite I thought up on the toilet" image?
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Jun 15, 2013 05:54
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Jerusalem posted:Is Chuck Austen the guy who wrote Worldwatch? The comic that was basically,"What if the Authority's take on the JLA had no redeeming features whatsoever?" Oh, and racism?" Yeah, that was Chucky A.
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Jun 15, 2013 05:59
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Now I really wanna see that top ten list.
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Jun 15, 2013 06:58
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Yea seriously somebody please make that list. I came in on marvel right as his run on Uncanny was ending. I read Brave New Mourning and that was horrendous but apparently I missed the mother load. Oh to have experienced that run firsthand...
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Jun 15, 2013 07:20
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Interviews are funny too: CBR: So, when I tell you I didn't like "Draco" [an "Uncanny X-Men" story], you're not going to go off and hide in a cave like Dick Cheney? Austen: [laughs] Yeah, actually Dick and I live in the same cave. I'm Robin to his Batman. laughs] And I mean that in every sexual way you can imagine. [laughs] A lot of people didn't like "Draco," but we tried. It's really tough, because people say "Y'know, we've been reading the same old thing" so then you give them something different and they say "Oh I hate what you did." That's another time I ran into someone who didn't like my work. So, we're up to three, now. Maybe I got more complaints than I realized [laughs]. He said, "That Draco thing-- it sucked" and I replied, "Ok, so what do you want me to do about that?" to which he replied "I've been collecting X-Men for 16 years and now I've stopped." So I say, "Well, I guess I saved you three dollars a month!"- what am I supposed to say to that? "Draco" got some negative response, but we were trying to do our best and put out something that everyone would like. And we failed. [laughs] No one died. CBR: But more seriously, some people think you're a misogynist, you hate women, you're obsessed with sex… Austen: Aren't we all obsessed with sex? And misogynist? Who says that? Some guy trying to pick up on a feminist? "Hey, baby. Wanna go out with me? I can use the word misogynist in a sentence." [laughs] --- Source: http://www.comicbookresources.com/?page=article&id=6421 Mister Roboto fucked around with this message at 07:49 on Jun 15, 2013 |
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Jun 15, 2013 07:46
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Jerusalem posted:Is Chuck Austen the guy who wrote Worldwatch? The comic that was basically,"What if the Authority's take on the JLA had no redeeming features whatsoever?"
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Jun 15, 2013 07:48
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Jun 15, 2013 07:58
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Xander77 posted:Wouldn't that just be the Authority? My understanding is Worldwatch actually contained full nudity and things like a Wonder Woman stand-in being raped on panel. I don't think the Authority pulled anything quite like that. Edit: Agh, forgot I was in a panels thread. Amazing Spider-Man #595 (I think): 
Madrox fucked around with this message at 08:14 on Jun 15, 2013 |
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Jun 15, 2013 07:59
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Xander77 posted:Wouldn't that just be the Authority? If nothing else, the Authority had the two super-macho alpha-males in the group as a loving gay couple whose relationship was treated as perfectly normal and sweet. For that alone it deserves credit. And since this is the funny panels thread and sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, here's a picture of Superman smoking a whole lot of cigars for a perfectly valid reason:  I don't have a source, unfortunately. I'm picking it's from the 50s or 60s though.
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Jun 15, 2013 09:20
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Jerusalem posted:If nothing else, the Authority had the two super-macho alpha-males in the group as a loving gay couple whose relationship was treated as perfectly normal and sweet. For that alone it deserves credit. It had some pretty drat fine Lobo crossovers!
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Jun 15, 2013 10:13
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Fuego Fish posted:Remember the time he wrote about that plot to make Nightcrawler the new Pope so they could fake the Rapture with communion wafers that vaporized people? Even though the Catholic church, like most denominations, doesn't believe in the idea of the Rapture. Is that the one where the entire premise of the plan was that the revelation that the new Pope looks like a demon will cause a mass loss of faith resulting in large-scale conversions from Roman Catholicism to the Church of Humanity, because there are no other religions and atheism apparently isn't an option?
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Jun 15, 2013 12:07
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Metal Loaf posted:Is that the one where the entire premise of the plan was that the revelation that the new Pope looks like a demon will cause a mass loss of faith resulting in large-scale conversions from Roman Catholicism to the Church of Humanity, because there are no other religions and atheism apparently isn't an option? Atheists don't exist in the Marvel Universe since God can 100% be proven to exist. Several people have his phone number. And miracles literally happen daily and are reported on CNN. And even if you don't believe in the Christian God, the rest of the religious pantheon will be happy to come down and beat you into believing.  More Than Meets The Eye. 18
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Jun 15, 2013 13:43
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Mister Roboto posted:Atheists don't exist in the Marvel Universe since God can 100% be proven to exist. Several people have his phone number. And miracles literally happen daily and are reported on CNN. And even if you don't believe in the Christian God, the rest of the religious pantheon will be happy to come down and beat you into believing. The definition of 'atheist' in the Marvel universe is probably someone who believes that all of these so-called deities are just advanced aliens who operate on a different physical rulebook, rather than Gods. Then there's a whole semantic and philosophical argument about what a 'god' actually is blah blah etcetera.
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Jun 15, 2013 14:04
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I like the Atheists from the webcomic Darwin Carmichael is Going to Hell. Since it's a world populated by mythological and religious beings right next to humans, the only atheists are crazy cults: http://dcisgoingtohell.com/040-dawkins-cult-part-ii/
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Jun 15, 2013 14:09
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Madrox posted:My understanding is Worldwatch actually contained full nudity and things like a Wonder Woman stand-in being raped on panel. I don't think the Authority pulled anything quite like that. What I loved about Osborn being in charge was how the general public just never acknowledged all the loving insane poo poo he was doing. He gave all HAMMER agents standard issue Goblin Gliders and pumpkin bombs and no one batted an eye.
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Jun 15, 2013 15:17
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bobkatt013 posted:Thank you Husk/Austen I always explain this away as Husk being ignorant.
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Jun 15, 2013 16:01
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Apparently she got that knowledge from Angel, Uncanny X-Men #427 And here's the article on CBR of some of Austen's brilliant work on that run: http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/2011/06/04/ten-goofiest-moments-in-uncanny-x-men-426-435/
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Jun 15, 2013 16:27
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Mister Roboto posted:Atheists don't exist in the Marvel Universe since God can 100% be proven to exist. Several people have his phone number. And miracles literally happen daily and are reported on CNN. And even if you don't believe in the Christian God, the rest of the religious pantheon will be happy to come down and beat you into believing. Tony Stark says hi. Considering he has wielded the Infinity Gauntlet, you'll have a hard time convincing himself that any kind of God actually exists, since he would know.
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Jun 15, 2013 17:43
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Defiance Industries posted:Tony Stark says hi. Considering he has wielded the Infinity Gauntlet, you'll have a hard time convincing himself that any kind of God actually exists, since he would know. But the Fantastic Four literally met God. He looked like Jack Kirby.
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Jun 15, 2013 17:51
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Yvonmukluk posted:But the Fantastic Four literally met God. Pff, unverifiable observations by a grieving family who has been previously exposed to possibly brain-damaging radiation? Get outta here with that poo poo. Next you'll be telling me Bruce Banner saw the Virgin Mary in a grilled cheese.
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Jun 15, 2013 17:59
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Yvonmukluk posted:But the Fantastic Four literally met God. He does not just look like Jack Kirby. He is  He also has a prophet. Fantastic Four 511  
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Jun 15, 2013 18:04
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I was working at a grocery store with a weirdly current spinner rack when Austen was current, so I read a lot of his issues. The Top Ten Stupidest Things Chuck Austen Did To The X-Men is probably something like: 10) The Exiles version of Illyana Rasputin being an omnisexual hosebeast who could only threaten or proposition everyone around her. It was like he was trying to beat some theoretical erotic fanfiction writer to the punch by being worse. 9) Introducing the She-Hulk/Juggernaut thing that Dan Slott immediately spent years trying to unspin. 8) He got five issues out of a wedding between Alex and Lorna that didn't end up happening, and it's all pure, bad soap opera, complete with Northstar as the Sassy Gay Friend. 7) Psycho Polaris, who has no real characterization under Austen other than "wants the D, is not getting the D." (Seriously, half of Austen's female characters behave like they had a really awful breakup earlier that afternoon and they've been chasing antidepressants with vodka ever since.) Incidentally also reversing thirty-odd years of characterization on a whim by saying, yeah, you're Magneto's daughter after all. Sorry about that, previous three or four generations of writers and fans who established otherwise. I'm pretty sure that somebody, maybe Peter David, ended up having to write some kind of story later on to "fix" Polaris by saying her powers were messing with her brain. 6) The cold open where four of the B-list X-characters show up crucified on the X-Mansion's lawn. Looking at an issue guide, this is the cold open they used for a 25-cent issue that was meant to attract new readers. 5) Austen seemed to have "powering up Warren" as one of his specific remits, which includes the healing factor and being able to cure people of serious diseases with blood transfusions. It's the only time I've ever seen a hamfisted Jesus metaphor used as an explicit power fantasy. 4) Havok using his own piss to reconstitute Iceman's body. 3) Introducing Nurse Annie, who's based off of Austen's wife and who immediately sparks an obvious cascade of bad ideas that would make for its own list: love triangles, the "mutants can't get AIDS" thing, etc. She seems to exist so she can be the rear end in a top hat in stories that apparently teach kids about tolerance. 2) The evil Catholics plot that doesn't actually resemble anything about Catholicism at all. 1) The Archangel/Husk plot in general. Archangel banging Husk in mid-air in public, in front of her mom and half of Kentucky. Then his Superman run was... ugh. It isn't even bad in a funny way; it's just dark and gross and extremely anti-woman and it showed up on grocery store spinner racks. There was a Superman comic Austen wrote where the villain of the week fucks women to death and shows up on-panel wearing their blood and I'm sure somebody's eight-year-old kid saw that and suffered some psychological damage. What's hosed is that in the middle of all of this Austen has a pretty good handle on the Juggernaut and the plot with him and Sammy is actually kind of nice. It's like a beautiful rose growing in the outflow from a septic tank. Madrox posted:My understanding is Worldwatch actually contained full nudity and things like a Wonder Woman stand-in being raped on panel. I don't think the Authority pulled anything quite like that. You know what was kind of weird, is that four years ago or so I erased the dialogue from that page so we could photoshop it in the "Ruin the Moment" thread, and last week somebody on my Facebook feed posted one of the photoshops ("You know who fucks real good? Redheads."). At least one of those has a/descended to "meme" status. And yeah, Worldwatch is explicitly, deliberately pornography, but it's that particular style of pornography made by somebody who is not getting laid and is really angry about it, so it's got some hosed-up attitudes towards the act itself and the women who enjoy it, tinged with just a soupcon of racism. I remember seeing it back in the day when we were agreeing as a species that Austen is as low as the X-Men franchise has ever gone.
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Jun 15, 2013 18:16
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Mister Roboto posted:CBR: But more seriously, some people think you're a misogynist, you hate women, you're obsessed with sex… Hahaha, Jesus Christ dude.
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Jun 15, 2013 18:34
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Being an atheist is one thing, but in a comic book world I think it'd be more prevalent to have people who reject belief in any kind of laws of science and would be kind of anarchist and devil-may-care about everything, possibly anticipating death or the end of the world at any moment. If you lived in a world where it's a long shot but not implausible that one day you could be walking down the street and suddenly gravity disappears for a while or your aunt turns into a neon Godzilla during every blue moon you could be forgiven for just not giving a gently caress about anything. Like hey, I'm going to jump off this tall building, wanna come? Nah, I'm not suicidal I just want to see what happens, y'know? Maybe someone will catch me, maybe my latent mutant power will kick in, maybe I'll fall through time, or maybe I'll die. And if I die, I might come back to life, whatever.
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Jun 15, 2013 19:23
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Fake Edit: I moved Austen to the Chat thread And now some content.  Wolverine v4 #19
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Jun 15, 2013 19:31
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Lobok posted:Being an atheist is one thing, but in a comic book world I think it'd be more prevalent to have people who reject belief in any kind of laws of science and would be kind of anarchist and devil-may-care about everything, possibly anticipating death or the end of the world at any moment. If you lived in a world where it's a long shot but not implausible that one day you could be walking down the street and suddenly gravity disappears for a while or your aunt turns into a neon Godzilla during every blue moon you could be forgiven for just not giving a gently caress about anything. Like hey, I'm going to jump off this tall building, wanna come? Nah, I'm not suicidal I just want to see what happens, y'know? Maybe someone will catch me, maybe my latent mutant power will kick in, maybe I'll fall through time, or maybe I'll die. And if I die, I might come back to life, whatever. "My name's not Ben Parker so I'll be back eventually."
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Jun 15, 2013 19:31
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Sockser posted:"My name's not Ben Parker so I'll be back eventually." I remember the Dan Slott series had She-Hulk working on a case involving (I think) a ghost accused of murder and a decisive argument was pointing out that Thanos had previously killed half of the known universe and asking those in the court who had been dead then returned to life to please raise their hands and, as one might expect, half the court does just that. That cracked me up.
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Jun 15, 2013 20:27
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Or is it Sputnik posted:
Why is Wolverine a sumo wrestler? VVV Apparently I do! PoptartsNinja fucked around with this message at 21:06 on Jun 15, 2013 |
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Jun 15, 2013 20:47
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That's not Wolverine, and you need to read Fraction's Iron Fist immediately.
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Jun 15, 2013 20:51
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