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Everyone I know who has seen The Lone Ranger either says it's Johnny Depp playing Capt Jack Arrow or "The last half hour is awesome, but the 2 hours before that just kinda suck". Basically I'm gonna wait till it shows up on netflix maybe. Also, the best sex scenes in YEARS were in MacGruber, and I'll fight anyone on the internet if they disagree. I've been trained in gorilla warfare, etc.
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Jul 15, 2013 05:03
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I thought After Earth was the biggest bomb of 2013.
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Jul 15, 2013 05:04
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Cowslips Warren posted:Then again I should have known what kind of spoiled selfish bitch the movie would be about during the opening scene where she sneaks away to apply makeup before getting back into bed with the sex-dude so she looks hot when he wakes up. How on earth do you get that she's spoiled and selfish when, as you say, she "sneaks away to apply makeup before getting back into bed with the sex-dude" specifically so he won't see her without it? Either you're seriously broken or I am, because I saw that scene as "the guy is such a pig that she knows he'll immediately complain if he sees her without makeup", not that she was conceited about her looks or something 
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Jul 15, 2013 05:22
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Cowslips Warren posted:
Pssst. Scroll down to executive producer #2.
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Jul 15, 2013 06:32
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sweeperbravo posted:Pssst. Scroll down to executive producer #2. Who is Eric Ellenbogen?
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Jul 15, 2013 08:22
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Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:Everyone I know who has seen The Lone Ranger either says it's Johnny Depp playing Capt Jack Arrow or "The last half hour is awesome, but the 2 hours before that just kinda suck". Basically I'm gonna wait till it shows up on netflix maybe. I guess what happened is that they thought "hey, we struck gold with Pirates Of The Caribbean, and people LOVE Johnny Depp as a weirdo. Let's make another film with Johnny Depp as a weirdo!", and completely forgot that POTC only worked so well because of the entire cast, not just Depp. The interplay between him, Geoffrey Rush, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley and Jack Davenport was what made those films work. Especially Geoffrey Rush, he's such an amazing villain.
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Jul 15, 2013 09:46
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Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:Also, the best sex scenes in YEARS were in MacGruber, and I'll fight anyone on the internet if they disagree. I've been trained in gorilla warfare, etc. I hated that movie, but the "recruit a team" scene and the sex scenes (particularly in the cemetery) were amazing and almost proved to be the film's saving grace.
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Jul 15, 2013 10:13
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Sagebrush posted:How on earth do you get that she's spoiled and selfish when, as you say, she "sneaks away to apply makeup before getting back into bed with the sex-dude" specifically so he won't see her without it? Either you're seriously broken or I am, because I saw that scene as "the guy is such a pig that she knows he'll immediately complain if he sees her without makeup", not that she was conceited about her looks or something What the gently caress. How would she know that?
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Jul 15, 2013 10:28
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Because she's been seeing him on and off for months, and he consistently acts like a pig to her? Like, right after that scene where she puts on makeup before he wakes up, he says something like "I don't know how to say this without sounding like a jerk, but I want you to leave now." And when she's talking with her girlfriends she acknowledges that he insults her all the time -- I remember a line like "he told you that you needed braces!" so I don't think it's much of a leap to assume he'd also be the type to say "wow, you look terrible without makeup". I don't know why everyone hated Bridesmaids so much. I thought it was fun. Sagebrush has a new favorite as of 10:48 on Jul 15, 2013 |
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Jul 15, 2013 10:45
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^^^Yeah I don't get the hate for Bridesmaids either. I thought it was good. It was pretty much the woman version of immature person has to learn how to grow in order to get their life together.
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Jul 15, 2013 11:08
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Sagebrush posted:Because she's been seeing him on and off for months, and he consistently acts like a pig to her? Like, right after that scene where she puts on makeup before he wakes up, he says something like "I don't know how to say this without sounding like a jerk, but I want you to leave now." And when she's talking with her girlfriends she acknowledges that he insults her all the time -- I remember a line like "he told you that you needed braces!" so I don't think it's much of a leap to assume he'd also be the type to say "wow, you look terrible without makeup". I quite enjoyed Bridesmaids myself, and had no idea even other girls hated it, though I could understand if it simply fell flat for some. I just thought, oh, finally, a stupid gross comedy for girls! Yay! Even without the background details that you noted, I can still appreciate the scenario. Am I the only chick who worries that I look just as gross when I wake up alone as I do when I wake up next to a hot guy? Now exaggerate the whole situation with obtuse characters for comedic effect and viola! Got a laugh out of me anyway. Anyway, the previous discussion about the nuclear family being preserved at the cost of sensible storytelling reminded me of a problem I had with Liberal Arts, never mind my problem is only tangentially related. I'm trying to put aside the awkwardness my boyfriend and I felt watching this as he's 50 and I'm 30. We laughed at the part where the main character starts doing the math on how old he was when the girl was born, and how old she'd be when he was elderly, having both done this ourselves. However, it was really clear that in this movie, the relationship was never meant to be because the age gap put these two in completely divergent stages of their life. It wasn't anything for me and my guy to object to. Being 50 and 30 is quite different than being 35 and 19. But then the guy had the one niter with the older woman. That was a hilarious scene, by the way, and I pretty much agreed with the character assassination she gave the guy. But in combination with the overly rosy, impossibly perfect relationship with the girl just his age that he's been overlooking, I felt like the movie was really rubbing it in that age gaps don't work. Or maybe the movie was just trying to present a character development arc where he moves on from college nostalgia, avoids becoming bitter, like his college professors, prematurely amd finds happiness being at the very stage he's supposed to be for a man his age. Maybe I'm being too sensitive. I should probably be more upset with movies where the male lead is so old that he probably shouldn't be making action movies anymore and yet he always get the extremely young and hot girl.
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Jul 15, 2013 14:23
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Cowslips Warren posted:Movies like this and Juno certainly helped show abortion providers as evil babykilling machines without any empathy. Seriously I wouldn't be surprised if some anti-choice fuckers wrote or produced this poo poo. Just because a movie suggests that there are options other than abortion and that pro-lifers have adopted the movies as part of their cause doesn't mean that those movies are actually anti-choice.
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Jul 15, 2013 15:37
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Cowslips Warren posted:Movies like this and Juno certainly helped show abortion providers as evil babykilling machines without any empathy. Seriously I wouldn't be surprised if some anti-choice fuckers wrote or produced this poo poo. If they had an abortion then there wouldn't be a movie.
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Jul 15, 2013 16:44
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Dr_Amazing posted:If they had an abortion then there wouldn't be a movie. His point is that the minute Juno thought of it the movie went into overdrive on no abortion is bad look at how bad abortion is until she decides not to do it. It's understandable that they'd want to display an anti-abortion message in a movie that is about hipster-teen pregnancy but a common complaint I hear about the movie is that it's really obvious about it.
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Jul 15, 2013 17:36
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Celery Face posted:That reminds me of Knocked Up. I just couldn't believe that a non super religious person with a sweet career she needed to focus on, would not get an abortion after getting pregnant from a drunken one night stand with a fat lazy manchild who only cares about pot and porn. I know there wouldn't be a movie if she had an abortion but come on. Yeah, I couldn't stand Knocked Up because it's my nightmare scenario. I'm chained to some schlub for the REST OF MY loving LIFE because I was drunk and horny one night. If they'd thrown in a scene where she is back in high school and doing a talent show in the nude in front of all her old classmates, it would basically be in line with my sleep landscape when I'm having a bad dream. If there hadn't been an undercurrent of "This is all of my worst fears being scrolled out on screen in lurid detail" then I might have enjoyed it more. Also, even though her getting pregnant is the impetus for the film, the whole story is pretty much about the guy and his journey towards adulthood and getting the girl. I don't give a poo poo about him! He's a horrible match for her! Just because he's capable of producing sperm doesn't mean that he should be in the picture at all, how is she going to deal with this bullshit? I know that Judd Apatow might be incapable of making that movie since it's not from the manchild's point of view, but it might have felt a bit more palatable for me.
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Jul 15, 2013 18:07
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And who said there would be no movie. Getting an abortion isn't just said and done in this country even after wrestling with the decision. There's screaming protestors, fake clinic entrances (Where they make you take your pants off so you cannot leave while they guilt you with misinformation, some protestors have had to escape without their dignity from those), state-mandated lectures, agonizing amounts of paperwork required, and the problem of often having to find someone else to help cover the payment especially if you're a teen. And sometimes they get bombed. I mean, I have not had the personal experience of having an abortion but this is what I've read. It could be interesting to show the entire gauntlet required after finally deciding that you're not going to go through with the pregnancy.
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Jul 15, 2013 18:11
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CJacobs posted:His point is that the minute Juno thought of it the movie went into overdrive on no abortion is bad look at how bad abortion is until she decides not to do it. It's understandable that they'd want to display an anti-abortion message in a movie that is about hipster-teen pregnancy but a common complaint I hear about the movie is that it's really obvious about it. I guess it's supposed to show that she's young and overwhelmed by it all, but the scene with the receptionist still grates on my nerves. I agree, it's hard to make a modern movie about an unwanted pregnancy, since abortion is a reasonable option. The only mainstream movie I can think of that avoids this is Saved, and only because she's devoutly Christian.
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Jul 15, 2013 18:15
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hyperhazard posted:It's just a bit silly. She goes into the clinic, the young woman behind the desk is ditzy and rude to her, she gets freaked out by the little noises around her (fingernails tapping, someone scratching their arm) and leaves. I thought it was because the asian girl protesting in front of the clinic told her the baby had fingernails at that point in the pregnancy. The tapping and scratching reminded her of that and she didn't want to go through with it, not because the receptionist was rude and ditzy.
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Jul 15, 2013 18:26
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hyperhazard posted:I agree, it's hard to make a modern movie about an unwanted pregnancy, since abortion is a reasonable option. The only mainstream movie I can think of that avoids this is Saved, and only because she's devoutly Christian. You could make it so that the woman actually does want kids even if the circumstances aren't how she'd choose. Rachel Dratch's situation comes to mind. In something like Knocked Up or Juno it's just not really given enough justification.
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Jul 15, 2013 18:30
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Sagebrush posted:I don't know why everyone hated Bridesmaids so much. I thought it was fun. I really liked Bridesmaids! I find it weird that everybody bitches about Wiig's character being an immature, selfish twit when a dozen films a year are put out starring a male immature, selfish twit and nobody bats a lash. Edit: ravenkult posted:What the gently caress. How would she know that [the guy is a pig]? LITERALLY A BIRD has a new favorite as of 18:52 on Jul 15, 2013 |
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Jul 15, 2013 18:38
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Yonic Symbolism posted:And who said there would be no movie. Getting an abortion isn't just said and done in this country even after wrestling with the decision. There's screaming protestors, fake clinic entrances (Where they make you take your pants off so you cannot leave while they guilt you with misinformation, some protestors have had to escape without their dignity from those), state-mandated lectures, agonizing amounts of paperwork required, and the problem of often having to find someone else to help cover the payment especially if you're a teen. And sometimes they get bombed. This doesn't sound very funny. I get what your saying, but its really common for movies to avoid obvious solutions. It doesn't mean there's an intended message. It drives me nuts when a character is late for work or something and its all due to a crazy mishap beyond his control. When he's questioned he'll always stammer like an idiot instead of just making it clear. Even worse is when someone asks why something happened then says "I don't want to hear any excuses". What do these people think excuses are?
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Jul 15, 2013 19:18
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Dr_Amazing posted:Even worse is when someone asks why something happened then says "I don't want to hear any excuses". What do these people think excuses are? Anything other than "I'm sorry, it's my fault, it won't happen again", if my fiancee's boss - who calls it an 'excuse' if she says she didn't do the thing he's angry about and tells her to 'take responsibility' for the thing she didn't do - is anything to go by.
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Jul 15, 2013 19:36
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KozmoNaut posted:Which is odd, because The Lone Ranger at least looks sort of decent. It's not. It's the first movie I've seen in a long time that at least at three points in it I was actually thinking about getting up and walking out, but someone had posted something about the ending sequence being good (okay, it was fun, but what made it exciting was the music) but... drat. I now call it "Tonto the Unreliable Narrator" -- What a stinking, overloaded, bloated, self-indulgent turd of a movie. My God, did that thing drag, and was it ever convoluted and obvious at the same time. Johnny Depp, of course, continues to play Johnny Depp, and that was fun -- I found his Tonto quite enjoyable ("Hiyo, Silver! AWAY!" "Don't EVER do that again!") and his mannerisms entertaining, but drat was the character of TLR ever done more sophomorically and stupidly? The guy played like a dimwitted, idealistic doogooder with no common sense, and even when he has seen Cavendish... umm... "do what he did," he still can't bring himself to shoot him, going on about JUSTICE!!! and so on. The Lone Ranger should not be his own comic relief stooge. Hell of a body count for a Disney film, too. Seems they used the "serious quotient" of the movie with all the killing and bloodletting, and tried to compensate with comedy bits from a moronic John Reed. In a way, though, I find myself looking at Reed and seeing the progression from an empty-headed, idealistic liberal (he actually says, "I don't believe in guns") to a conservative through hard knocks and experience. Yet in only a few hours, he is a crack shot. (And another insanity: after being shot through both shoulders, he is fine after a few hours, even being able to raise himself up on his arms. What the hell?) And what was up with that horrible framing element? It was overlong, stupid, and kept interrupting the action. Whose brilliant idea was that? Without it, the movie could clearly have been brought in nearer to two hours. And a final thing -- if Tonto is narrating, how the hell can he be telling stuff that happened where neither he nor Reed were present to get the story -- especially scenes where the folks in them all died? That is a cardinal rule of narration. If you have a narrator, he needs to be in virtually every, as it's HIS story; otherwise, how would he know?
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Jul 15, 2013 21:26
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kinmik posted:Unrelated, but I watched Oz the Great and Powerful for the first time and was pretty disappointed. It seemed to eventually devolve into a harem-ish setting like in my animus with every relevant hot chick falling over themselves to get with the main protagonist. I was holding out hope that Glinda would remain platonic, and in the end we just let out this huge groan as she goes in for the clincher. That movie pissed me off so much, mainly because I've been a livelong Oz Series fan. L. Frank Baum explicitly wrote the series to be feminist (note all the powerful women in the series - Dorothy, Glinda, Ozma), and here's these chucklefucks going and loving that up. The screenwriter actually said that it was "hard to find a fairy tale with a good male protagonist."
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Jul 15, 2013 21:31
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: "And then their relationship is never referenced again."
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Dopefish Lives! posted:That movie pissed me off so much, mainly because I've been a livelong Oz Series fan. L. Frank Baum explicitly wrote the series to be feminist (note all the powerful women in the series - Dorothy, Glinda, Ozma), and here's these chucklefucks going and loving that up. The screenwriter actually said that it was "hard to find a fairy tale with a good male protagonist." That, and the character of the Wizard isn't supposed to be sympathetic until after he's deposed. Even then, he's a brash, impulsive charlatan who often gets by on his own limited wit and the actual smarts - and work! - of other people. He's an inept conman who came into power by luck, and he didn't even realize that until Ozma pointed it out to him (in Dorothy and The Wizard in Oz, if memory serves). Even Billina - the loving chicken - is a stronger protagonist than Mr. Oz Pinhead.
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Jul 15, 2013 21:46
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Gaunab posted:I thought it was because the asian girl protesting in front of the clinic told her the baby had fingernails at that point in the pregnancy. The tapping and scratching reminded her of that and she didn't want to go through with it, not because the receptionist was rude and ditzy.  Holy crap, I never made the connection before. That explains the woman putting on nail polish, too.
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Jul 15, 2013 21:59
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tvb posted:Somewhat similarly, Bridesmaids. Kristen Wiig's character is unlikeable from the start -- she's rude and self-destructive, and she repeatedly acts on her jealousy in outrageous, humiliating fashion. She's a goddamn train wreck who is clearly refusing to take care of herself and her own emotional issues, and in doing so, continually hurts the people around her If you watched the whole movie, that really turned out to be the entire point of her character arc, from the nice guy cop, her own best friend, her mom and the "all up in your face fat girl" calling Wiig out on her bullshit and encouraging her to get on with her life. Henchman of Santa posted:You missed the entire point of Bridesmaids. The main character's rude, self-destructive, jealous nature is exactly why she almost loses her best friend. By the end, she learns the error of her ways, rekindles her friendship and finds a guy who actually treats her well. Did you stop watching the movie halfway through or something? Yeah, that. tvb posted:She does very little to earn her reprieve. After making a scene at and/or ruining almost every pre-wedding event (and letting her personal issues interfere with her job and relationship), she helps find the missing bride and...is apologized to by both her and Ms. Money-can't-buy-happiness. The only way she rekindles her friendship is by her friend assuming partial responsibility for her mental instability and atrocious behavior. I understand the intended message, but Wiig's character's actions at the end are poor recompense for her behavior throughout the movie, and I don't buy that she really grows -- she just gets what she wants (as far as her relationships go, anyway). What you said is a nice sentiment, but I don't think it's well-realized in the movie at all. Which one was "Ms. Money-can't-buy-happiness?" The rich girl? Those people owed her an apology. The first for blowing her off and selling her out to the rich girl and the second for being a complete rear end in a top hat about things and showing her up at every turn. Annie was insecure and got caught up in one-upmanship, thought she was losing her best friend and couldn't afford to keep up with and play ball with the expensive trips and wedding gowns, which only heightened her insecurity and increased her downward spiral. I'd hardly say her "reprieve" amounted to "Cinderella at the Ball" so much as "Annie learns a lesson and turns the page." Bridesmaids was funny and great.
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Jul 15, 2013 23:45
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I love Lilo and Stitch, it's one of my favourite movies and I watched the hell out of the series too, but there was this one thing from the movie that bugged me. Why did the animal shelter owner put Stitch with the other dogs if she thought he was dead? Also, in Jurassic Park, how did Nedry get put in charge of the place's security system if he was so dumb around dinosaurs?
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Jul 16, 2013 00:27
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Celery Face posted:Also, in Jurassic Park, how did Nedry get put in charge of the place's security system if he was so dumb around dinosaurs? I got the impression that he was hired to help get the computer systems (all of them) cobbled together and working, and hadn't been told the scope of what he was getting in for, so he put in a bid for the work that grossly underestimated how much work he'd be doing and how long he'd be at it. In short, he was the lowest bidder. Plus, I'm pretty sure dinosaurs featured precisely gently caress-ALL in what he did. All he did was code and keep the computers from crashing every five minutes. He only shut the fences off because it was the fastest way he could get to the docks before the boat left, and he needed to manually open some of the gates. He never anticipated getting face to face with a frill-necked venom-spitting carnivore.
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Jul 16, 2013 00:35
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Isn't Nedry also Hammond's nephew or something? Did I make that up?
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Jul 16, 2013 00:38
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Henchman of Santa posted:Isn't Nedry also Hammond's nephew or something? Did I make that up? I think it was that his uncle was involved with him getting a job at the park or something along those lines, but it isn't Hammond who is his uncle.
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Jul 16, 2013 01:05
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Jay 2K Winger posted:I got the impression that he was hired to help get the computer systems (all of them) cobbled together and working, and hadn't been told the scope of what he was getting in for, so he put in a bid for the work that grossly underestimated how much work he'd be doing and how long he'd be at it. The joke being that Hammond goes on about how no expense was spared, except he cuts hella corners on stuff behind the scenes like computers.
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Jul 16, 2013 01:12
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Jay 2K Winger posted:In short, he was the lowest bidder. Yep. It's the overarching joke of the whole movie that Hammond was constantly crowing about sparing no expense, when in reality he was stingy on the parts that mattered the most. The irritating part for me is that Hammond survives. I feel that his end in the book was a better fit thematically, seeing as how it was his hubris that brought about all that death and destruction in the first place. Everyone else had to face the consequences of his actions except him. On a side note, I just had an 'I feel old' moment when I looked up the movie and saw it turned 20 this year.
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Jul 16, 2013 01:25
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The movie Hammond is more interesting IMO. In the book he's practically a cackling villain. A lot of those lines by the bloodsucking lawyer Gennaro in the movie were taken from Hammond in the book. Nedry was also a little more sympathetic in the book because he's a guy that's really good at his job but is blackmailed into the Jurassic Park job by Hammond.
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Jul 16, 2013 01:28
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Yeah Hammond was lots less likable in the book and nedry was less hatable in the book. But when you cast Newman concessions are gonna be made
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Jul 16, 2013 01:37
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Sagebrush posted:I don't know why everyone hated Bridesmaids so much. I thought it was fun. They didn't. It has a 90% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and made over $150 million. BiggerBoat posted:If you watched the whole movie, that really turned out to be the entire point of her character arc, from the nice guy cop, her own best friend, her mom and the "all up in your face fat girl" calling Wiig out on her bullshit and encouraging her to get on with her life. Twice now! Goddamn, people, someone can disagree with you and it doesn't mean they didn't watch the whole movie. I watched the whole movie. As I articulated already, I understand what the character arc is supposed to be, I simply thought that her character's reprieve came too easily and wasn't convincingly earned. It's OK for someone to disagree with you about this. There is no objective truth to this argument.
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Jul 16, 2013 01:51
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More from TV series than any given movie, but when questioned by cops, baristas remember what drink(s) people ordered days/weeks/months ago. That's akin to me remembering what basketful of groceries some stranger bought a week ago. Cashiers don't care what people buy. They wouldn't remember purchases unless the customer pitched a shitfest over a coupon or something.
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Jul 16, 2013 03:43
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Wedemeyer posted:More from TV series than any given movie, but when questioned by cops, baristas remember what drink(s) people ordered days/weeks/months ago. That's akin to me remembering what basketful of groceries some stranger bought a week ago. Cashiers don't care what people buy. They wouldn't remember purchases unless the customer pitched a shitfest over a coupon or something. I think usually that's to imply that they're a regular who tips well, since oftentimes baristas do remember if you order the same thing every day for months. Though it might just be a way to remind lazy viewers who the guy speaking is, especially if they haven't put him in an apron or something. Though yeah that is kind of silly. Maybe it just reflects on what writers feel the ideal barista should do, so maybe it's meant to indicate to viewers that the info given by the character is plot-critical info, since they've quickly established that the speaker is a hard worker and has a good memory. OXBALLS DOT COM has a new favorite as of 03:58 on Jul 16, 2013 |
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Jul 16, 2013 03:56
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Cowslips Warren posted:Then again I should have known what kind of spoiled selfish bitch the movie would be about during the opening scene where she sneaks away to apply makeup before getting back into bed with the sex-dude so she looks hot when he wakes up. Wait, she has SEX!?? That bitch!
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Jul 16, 2013 07:29
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I think you are missing the point of that sentence.
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Jul 16, 2013 07:31
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