p-lang thread: (now (have you (problems two)))

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > p-lang thread: (now (have you (problems two)))

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multigl: Nov 22, 2005; "Who's cool and has two thumbs? This guy!"

yes, follow the advice of an idiot programmer

# ? Jul 20, 2013 20:41

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# ? May 15, 2024 18:07

Janitor Prime: Jan 22, 2004; PC LOAD LETTER

What da fuck does that mean; Fun Shoe

He's not wrong about statement mappings

# ? Jul 20, 2013 20:45

Sapozhnik: Jan 2, 2005; Nap Ghost

same, except do everything using stored procs and transparently bind them to Java interfaces using proxy objects

maybe also use SQL views and some limited WHERE and ORDER BY generation to sort and filter those if you need a sortable and filterable report table thing every now and again

# ? Jul 20, 2013 20:55

Squinty Applebottom: Jan 1, 2013

developers are idiots who can't be trusted running queries against a db so you should always provide nice padded views for them to bang their head against

# ? Jul 20, 2013 20:57

Squinty Applebottom: Jan 1, 2013

if your data is at all useable by base tables either its trivial or you aren't normalized properly

# ? Jul 20, 2013 20:58

DONT THREAD ON ME: Oct 1, 2002; by Nyc_Tattoo; Floss Finder

Just use excel you dringus

# ? Jul 20, 2013 21:10

Bloody: Mar 3, 2013

just store everything in memory as a hash table or array or linked list or whatever

# ? Jul 20, 2013 21:12

havelock: Jan 20, 2004; IGNORE ME; Soiled Meat

Plus bits of stored procs are super easy to copy and paste into other stored procs when you need to compose parts of queries that share the same logic.

# ? Jul 20, 2013 22:09

vapid cutlery

Apr 17, 2007

php:

<?
"it's george costanza" ?>

polpotpi posted:

if your data is at all useable by base tables either its trivial or you aren't normalized properly

time to masturbate endlessly over third normal form "Hentai website running at optimal performance" says Miku-chan, my database monitoring script tells me sexily

# ? Jul 21, 2013 01:00

coaxmetal: Oct 21, 2010; I flamed me own dad

Socracheese posted:

in django i make my db be compatible with the orm and i use it when its easy like

user = User.objects.get(name="shitlord mcfuckstein")

but i write my own sql queries when i need to do anything like multiple relations

where does that put me on the pro/scrub scale

that's like super scrub because you don't know how to use the orm, which is pretty easy to use.

# ? Jul 21, 2013 01:14

vapid cutlery

Apr 17, 2007

php:

<?
"it's george costanza" ?>

orm's that don't let you write your own sql are cool

# ? Jul 21, 2013 02:11

coaxmetal: Oct 21, 2010; I flamed me own dad

most of the orms I know let you write your own sql if you really wanna.

# ? Jul 21, 2013 03:33

DONT THREAD ON ME: Oct 1, 2002; by Nyc_Tattoo; Floss Finder

writing your own sql is as stupid as writing your own encryption/hashing

# ? Jul 21, 2013 03:36

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

chumpchous posted:

writing your own sql is as stupid as writing your own encryption/hashing

lol

what is best in life

to see your orm do stuff for you, but write sql when you need it

# ? Jul 21, 2013 03:40

Shaggar: Apr 26, 2006

orms write bad sql so you don't have to

# ? Jul 21, 2013 04:25

Goat Bastard: Oct 20, 2004

chumpchous posted:

writing your own sql is as stupid as writing your own encryption/hashing

but less stupid than the number of people who think this unironically

# ? Jul 21, 2013 04:42

Gazpacho: Jun 18, 2004; by Fluffdaddy; Slippery Tilde

What if we could learn what orms are doing internally and then leverage them only when they provide benefit

Whoa

# ? Jul 21, 2013 05:07

Janitor Prime: Jan 22, 2004; PC LOAD LETTER

What da fuck does that mean; Fun Shoe

Gazpacho posted:

What if we could learn

That's a pretty impossible task right there for your average developer

# ? Jul 21, 2013 05:23

Stringent: Dec 22, 2004; image text goes here

Shaggar posted:

orms write bad sql so you don't have to

shaggar was right

# ? Jul 21, 2013 06:59

Nomnom Cookie: Aug 30, 2009

Shaggar posted:

orms write bad sql so you don't have to

ain't no sql wizard can improve SELECT * FROM poo poo WHERE gloppiness = 'NOTMUCH'

# ? Jul 21, 2013 07:54

double sulk: Jul 2, 2010

programming is dumb and a waste of time and the less work you have to do to get it over with the better

who cares about efficiency, just throw more hardware at it

# ? Jul 21, 2013 08:53

Stringent: Dec 22, 2004; image text goes here

gucci void main posted:

programming is dumb and a waste of time and the less work you have to do to get it over with the better

who cares about efficiency, just throw more hardware at it

i would love to throw hardware at you

# ? Jul 21, 2013 09:27

DONT THREAD ON ME: Oct 1, 2002; by Nyc_Tattoo; Floss Finder

Shaggar posted:

orms write bad sql so you don't have to

i just faced up to the fact that i'm gonna be writing bad sql no matter what. might as well do it in 1/8 as many keystrokes

# ? Jul 21, 2013 09:34

Stringent: Dec 22, 2004; image text goes here

chumpchous posted:

i just faced up to the fact that i'm gonna be writing bad sql no matter what. might as well do it in 1/8 as many keystrokes

this

# ? Jul 21, 2013 09:41

Max Facetime: Apr 18, 2009

Stringent posted:

i would love to throw hardware at you

# ? Jul 21, 2013 10:21

Zombywuf: Mar 29, 2008

How do I ORM a window function?

# ? Jul 21, 2013 11:10

HORATIO HORNBLOWER: Sep 21, 2002; no ambition,
no talent,
no chance

Java code:

try {
        //...
} catch(Exception e) {
        throw e;
}

this should be a compiler error and by compiler error I mean the computer loving explodes and takes you out with it.

# ? Jul 22, 2013 04:17

Opinion Haver: Apr 9, 2007

HORATIO HORNBLOWER posted:

Java code:
try {
        //...
} catch(Exception e) {
        throw e;
}
this should be a compiler error and by compiler error I mean the computer loving explodes and takes you out with it.

the other day i ran into some code that used singletons for all of its exceptions

# ? Jul 22, 2013 04:22

HORATIO HORNBLOWER: Sep 21, 2002; no ambition,
no talent,
no chance

here's another fun one

Java code:

Exception thrown = null;

try {
        // entire body of bigass method, with like a million different lines that can throw
} catch(Exception e) {
        thrown = e;
} finally {
        // cleanup code with a shitload of branching since we don't have any idea what was going on when the exception got thrown
        if(thrown != null) {
                throw new Exception("worthless, unhelpful message, usually punctuated with four or five exclamation points");
        }
}

exception handling is hard, let's go shopping

# ? Jul 22, 2013 19:39

Shaggar: Apr 26, 2006

lol

# ? Jul 22, 2013 19:45

GameCube: Nov 21, 2006

Stringent posted:

i would love to throw hardware at you

lol

# ? Jul 22, 2013 20:07

Janitor Prime: Jan 22, 2004; PC LOAD LETTER

What da fuck does that mean; Fun Shoe

HORATIO HORNBLOWER posted:

here's another fun one

Java code:

Exception thrown = null;

try {
        // entire body of bigass method, with like a million different lines that can throw
} catch(Exception e) {
        thrown = e;
} finally {
        // cleanup code with a shitload of branching since we don't have any idea what was going on when the exception got thrown
        if(thrown != null) {
                throw new Exception("worthless, unhelpful message, usually punctuated with four or five exclamation points");
        }
}

exception handling is hard, let's go shopping

I've seen that poo poo sandwich before :barf:

Unfortunately I think it's the only way to do it without re-factoring the entire method, and since no one wants to do it they just keep piling on more poo poo in the stupid exception handler

# ? Jul 22, 2013 20:09

DONT THREAD ON ME: Oct 1, 2002; by Nyc_Tattoo; Floss Finder

this practice of programming book is v. good. thank you

# ? Jul 23, 2013 00:56

Goat Bastard: Oct 20, 2004

Hard NOP Life posted:

I've seen that poo poo sandwich before

Unfortunately I think it's the only way to do it without re-factoring the entire method, and since no one wants to do it they just keep piling on more poo poo in the stupid exception handler

at the very least pass thrown into the new lovely exception so you don't suppress all the useful information about what actually went wrong jesus christ

# ? Jul 23, 2013 05:04

coaxmetal: Oct 21, 2010; I flamed me own dad

HORATIO HORNBLOWER posted:

here's another fun one

Java code:

Exception thrown = null;

try {
        // entire body of bigass method, with like a million different lines that can throw
} catch(Exception e) {
        thrown = e;
} finally {
        // cleanup code with a shitload of branching since we don't have any idea what was going on when the exception got thrown
        if(thrown != null) {
                throw new Exception("worthless, unhelpful message, usually punctuated with four or five exclamation points");
        }
}

exception handling is hard, let's go shopping

if only java had checked exceptions this never would have happened

# ? Jul 23, 2013 06:32

tef: May 30, 2004; -> some l-system crap ->

chumpchous posted:

this practice of programming book is v. good. thank you

# ? Jul 23, 2013 09:42

Max Facetime: Apr 18, 2009

yaoi prophet posted:

the other day i ran into some code that used singletons for all of its exceptions

I bet they prevent stale stacktraces from being logged by always calling fillInStackTrace() right before throwing their exception :allears:

# ? Jul 23, 2013 12:30

Sang-: Nov 2, 2007

yaoi prophet posted:

the other day i ran into some code that used singletons for all of its exceptions

this is acceptable if you're using them for non-local return (although Im not sure how threadsafe that is?)

# ? Jul 23, 2013 16:28

Nomnom Cookie: Aug 30, 2009

Sang- posted:

this is acceptable if you're using them for non-local return (although Im not sure how threadsafe that is?)

who cares you already hosed the dog by throwing an exception to jump up the stack

# ? Jul 23, 2013 16:35

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# ? May 15, 2024 18:07

PleasingFungus: Oct 10, 2012; idiot asshole bitch who should fuck off

chumpchous posted:

this practice of programming book is v. good. thank you

yeah, just finished reading through it last night. a few parts of it are humorously dated, one or two things I disagree with (e.g. their recommendation to use cross-platform graphics frameworks, ala java or tcl/tk, to make your program portable - though that's also probably in the 'dated' bucket), but most of it is really good solid programtips. v. smart dog, commendable.

# ? Jul 23, 2013 17:01

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > p-lang thread: (now (have you (problems two)))

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