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Previous thread: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3022717 This post is from page one, and it still makes me to this day: xarph posted:From a former life, names changed to protect myself although I could care less about the subject: Post your woes of indecipherable requests for the needful, vent about printers and new hires, and learn some cool stuff in this thread. Some recommended/required reading: Midelne's saga of trimuph Dick Trauma's pod adventures Corvette Fisher/Dilbert As gently caress's journey to the promised land blackswordca's stories to date The YOTJ emoticon: came from the old thread. Pictures: Dick Trauma posted:Old images I dug up: Sickening posted:Oldie but Goodie. Kuros posted:
toe shoes posted:Here is something that should probably go in the OP, company_loyalty.txt Sham I Am posted:Why yes I am IT, A new hero emerges! Click for the saga of larchesdanrew, worth the read... kensei fucked around with this message at 05:55 on Sep 22, 2016 |
# ? Aug 13, 2013 03:38 |
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# ? May 16, 2024 18:53 |
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Excellent, a new thread. A resume came in! Or rather, entire truckloads. Some resume tips if you wish to get an actual interview: - Proofead your resume ... if you make thes kinds of gramatical and spelling errors what kind of code do you think we think you will write - When including references to applications that you've published, you may wish to remove the ones with only one review, which is for 1 star. - I'm glad that your debugging skills are so good that you felt compelled to point this out in your resume. Sadly, it doesn't indicate what you think it does. - Want to let us know how good you are? Then by means let us know that you are an expert in (insert 10 random widget classes here). This gives us an excellent indicator of your caliber. - Sometimes, listing too many technologies and skills is as bad as listing too few, especially when they're skills you (and the rest of the world) haven't used for decades. My kingdom for a competent mobile developer prospect
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 04:19 |
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A hundred tickets came in: I love working solo when everyone comes back from vacation. I was lucky nothing actually broke yesterday.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 05:48 |
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Volmarias posted:Excellent, a new thread. The best is people including headshots for an IT job.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 05:54 |
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Alright, ground floor. For content: rumour around the office is that we're going to lose one of our (already severely understaffed) members. we've already lost 3 with no replacement since last year...
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 05:54 |
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mysteryberto posted:The best is people including headshots for an IT job. Headshots are normal for all CVs here, is this not true for you guys?
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 06:12 |
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SEKCobra posted:Headshots are normal for all CVs here, is this not true for you guys? Nope. European CVs are about the person. US resumes are about skills, degrees, and other measures of the value an employer can extract.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 06:16 |
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Word came down the one of our 4 desktop guys has finally gotten fired. It's about 5 months overdue. The final straw was I think last week when instead of adding another users email address as an alias to another account in Postini; he deleted the account he was supposed to add the alias on to. Yeah, the account with 10 years of legal, financial and health record emails that need to be archived for a decade as per HIPPA. Those emails are now gone, and we have Postini trying to recover them for us but it doesn't look good. Now that he's been fired I might start telling some stories of the man I shall call Matt.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 06:23 |
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Factory Factory posted:Nope. European CVs are about the person. US resumes are about skills, degrees, and other measures of the value an employer can extract. Well you probably won't get a job if you don't include your qualifications here, but you are right, we have a lot of stuff about unrelated education and such. Heh, I never noticed this before.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 06:26 |
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SEKCobra posted:Headshots are normal for all CVs here, is this not true for you guys? I think the idea is the only reason you'd need a head shot for most jobs is to discriminate illegally.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 07:27 |
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SEKCobra posted:Headshots are normal for all CVs here, is this not true for you guys? I was told only include a headshot for modeling/etc.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 07:29 |
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Billy the Mountain posted:Word came down the one of our 4 desktop guys has finally gotten fired. It's about 5 months overdue. Please do Let me ask, is this guy as bad as Dick Trauma's "Tony" (that was the name he was using for him here, right?)?
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 07:47 |
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Dr. Arbitrary posted:I think the idea is the only reason you'd need a head shot for most jobs is to discriminate illegally. Well I always assumed it's so that HR can go "THAT GUYS FAT, NOPE" "DON'T LIKE HIS FACE, BYE". Since it's their choice who to hire, you can't really get around it. Also we don't have that many black people to have problems with racism, our foreigners are clearly distinguishable by their name.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 08:03 |
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Billy the Mountain posted:Now that he's been fired I might start telling some stories of the man I shall call Matt. Maggot Monster posted:I had a pretty good experience. However I can replicate his formula for you so you can DIY. Basically take your resume and every single time you mention something without specifics, add specific details. Seriously, a solid 99% of the work we did was him highlighting things in my resume and saying HOW MANY, HOW OFTEN, FOR WHO, WHEN? and me filling in the details for like 20 back and forths. Yeah that really is what it boils down to. Also don't start bullet points off with "assisted with" or "helped with", even if it's true and you're modest. "Responsible for X part of Y project" works though, if you're specific on what X part did and how many people used Y project.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 08:07 |
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SEKCobra posted:Well I always assumed it's so that HR can go "THAT GUYS FAT, NOPE" "DON'T LIKE HIS FACE, BYE". Since it's their choice who to hire, you can't really get around it. Also we don't have that many black people to have problems with racism, our foreigners are clearly distinguishable by their name. They get around not being allowed a
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 09:22 |
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quote:On my old I phone I have some music that has not copied over when I upgraded because its music copied over from CD’s. From a long time ago I remember opening up I tunes and copying it onto a folder on my pc and then plugging in my new phone and just added the library to it but it does not seem to work now. When you have a minute and you know how can you come up and have a look please? So much for being the new Senior Systems Administrator job title I've acquired.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 11:19 |
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SEKCobra posted:Well I always assumed it's so that HR can go "THAT GUYS FAT, NOPE" "DON'T LIKE HIS FACE, BYE". Since it's their choice who to hire, you can't really get around it. Also we don't have that many black people to have problems with racism, our foreigners are clearly distinguishable by their name. Actually, at least in the UK, you are advised (even on government websites) not to include a photo or any indication of your ethnicity, gender or age when applying for a job. Obviously gender can generally be judged from your name, but don't explicitly state male/female. Why? Because these are protected categories under discrimination law, so the rationale is to not give employers any chance to discriminate (until they've at least met you I guess).
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 11:55 |
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 12:16 |
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Blaminator posted:So much for being the new Senior Systems Administrator job title I've acquired. Manager: Hey, can you go look at the PM's cell phone? Me: Funny, I did not know that Cisco start making cell phones. Manager: Well you know that he only like dealing with American's. Me: Yeah, I know, ok, fine, well do, he up there now? Manager: Yeah, he is there waiting on you. Me: Great (as I walk one flight of stairs, take an elevator for two more and walk one more flight. I always think of the documentary "The Smartest Guys in the Room" as I walk to that office suite) Me: Afternoon, what can I do for you? PM: When, when I landed in Dubai, my cell phone was not picking up carrier, so I factory reset my phone and now all my ring tones are gone. Me: Funny, so you erased all the music you copied into it? PM: No, all the ring tones the phone came with, there are all erased. Me: Funny-er, I did not know that you could even erase that from a Nokia phone (It's the only Nokia smart phone on the project, we paid $900 US for it, so the PM could carry his Corp issued iPhone and his project paid personal phone) Me: Well let me take a look at it please, if you don't mind. You know, Adrian is way better with Nokia (he's European and the biggest Nokia fanboy). Me: Oh, I really have no idea what I am doing here, do you have the manual for this thing? Me: Oh, I think I see it now, you just need to work on this menu, here are all the factory ringtones. PM: Thank you... I walked out of the office listening to a virtual symphony. Job titles mean nothing when there's trump yours, LOL.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 12:27 |
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At least you were doing replication as well as your regular mysqldumps/XtraBackups, so you didn't lose much, right?
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 13:34 |
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Tasty Wheat posted:Manager: Hey, can you go look at the PM's cell phone? It's important to clarify or have someone above you clarify what it is you do. Not doing that is how I ended up having to install power for desks as network infrastructure technician.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 13:38 |
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Yo movax, were we closing the 'poo poo you come across daily' thread as well and combining it with this one? Or was that not the plan? Edit: grammers Sirotan fucked around with this message at 14:20 on Aug 13, 2013 |
# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:06 |
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dennyk posted:At least you were doing replication as well as your regular mysqldumps/XtraBackups, so you didn't lose much, right? Didn't lose anything as it was the old DB server I was decommissioning and it promptly died when I tried to copy some stuff off it. Glad we moved production off it a month ago. However, asked our hosting company to power cycle it to see if I could get it responding again and they switched off a different machine which is still down an hour later.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:13 |
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Dr. Arbitrary posted:I think the idea is the only reason you'd need a head shot for most jobs is to discriminate illegally. Until reading this point, I was trying to work out what a "headshot" even was in this context and the closest I could come up with was someone posting their kill/death stats in CounterStrike or some poo poo. Is this the part of the thread now where we discuss what needs to be in the OP. Things I can think of would be: - Summary of Midelne's woes with his old drunk dead boss and then Rod who was even worse - the first ticket thread superstar - Summary of Dick Trauma / Rod / the whole "in a pod" meme - YOTJ Any others? Also voting that the next thread be named: FW: RE: A ticket came in.... Lum fucked around with this message at 14:27 on Aug 13, 2013 |
# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:23 |
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Lum posted:until reading this point, I was trying to work out what a "headshot" even was in this context and the closest I could come up with was someone posting their kill/death stats in CounterStrike or some poo poo. There were so, so many, I had no idea what to put in. Let me know what you think deserves to be in there and I will add it. quote:Also voting that the next thread be named: FW: RE: A ticket came in.... Glad the joke did not go unnoticed
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:26 |
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Somebody should compile blackswordca's posts and our growing horror to his entire situation.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:29 |
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kensei posted:There were so, so many, I had no idea what to put in. Let me know what you think deserves to be in there and I will add it. Thinking something like: Midelne: The first ticket thread superstar. Had a boss that used to drive into work drunk in the evenings and start randomly re-arranging servers in the racks. This boss was eventually killed off by another drunk driver and replaced by a guy named Rod who was somehow even worse. Midelne now works for another company and doesn't post much. (include some quoted posts here) Dick Trauma: The second to post an ongoing saga of management incompetence, this time at the hands of Tony, a guy who came up with this solution to the server room overheat alarm sounding. (that picture of the fan pointing at the thermostat) Dick has now moved to another company, one that provides literal free lunches, occasionally posts about how awesome it is, and is usually told "get back in your pod" reference to the V1.0 of The Matrix. YOTJ - Year of the Job: A term invented after many posters with horrible jobs all found much better ones. YOTJ has currently been ongoing for about 900 days at this point. Not sure who else needs to be included. CorvetteFisher as the poster child for abusive employer Stockholm Syndrome perhaps? Someone else can write that one.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:35 |
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Lum posted:Until reading this point, I was trying to work out what a "headshot" even was in this context and the closest I could come up with was someone posting their kill/death stats in CounterStrike or some poo poo. The endless horror of blackswordca's gently caress. Beaten!
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:36 |
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Sirotan posted:Yo movax, were we closing the 'poo poo you come across daily' thread as well and combining it with this one? Or was that not the plan? Personally I'd rather this didn't happen. They do cover different topics, to an extent.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:42 |
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Shame a new topic. Wasn't even halfway done reading the horrors within the last one.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:44 |
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mpyro posted:Shame a new topic. Wasn't even halfway done reading the horrors within the last one. It's really too bad that they just delete threads when they're done.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 14:58 |
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Lum posted:Also voting that the next thread be named: FW: RE: A ticket came in.... Followed by: "MY TICKET - URGENT! (Was: FW: RE: A ticket came in...)"
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 15:00 |
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EAT THE EGGS RICOLA posted:It's really too bad that they just delete threads when they're done. It's in the Comedy Goldmine.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 15:35 |
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3 hours later, hosting company still apparently unable to locate on button for server they switched off by mistake.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 15:42 |
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Shalhavet posted:It's in the Comedy Goldmine. Excuse me I think I know how forums work also why else would mpyro be saying that.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 15:43 |
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"Why you should get a new job and learn to stand up for yourself." By Corvettefisher.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 15:56 |
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EAT THE EGGS RICOLA posted:It's really too bad that they just delete threads when they're done. Subject: Thread deleted Priority: Critical Please restore immediately, this is affecting production!!!!1 Shalhavet posted:It's in the Comedy Goldmine.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 16:03 |
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jre posted:3 hours later, hosting company still apparently unable to locate on button for server they switched off by mistake. This is code for "The server isn't in the rack where it should be". I worked in webhosting, I loved finding a server with an asset tag on the opposite side of a 2000 square foot datacenter from where it should be.
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 16:06 |
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A ticket reply came in: "Why should I be responsible for what my end users do on this server?" Uh... because you pay for it?
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 16:14 |
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# ? May 16, 2024 18:53 |
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Requesting one of my favorite moments from the previous thread, fan pointed at thermostat.jpg
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# ? Aug 13, 2013 16:34 |