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Benny the Snake posted:It's tedious as heck. Like dealing with you over the last seven months?
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Aug 14, 2013 22:01
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Benny the Snake posted:Done and done; especially for the "on the spot" and "my name is" bits. The rest of it will take more time to get around since it's a habit but I'll kick it sooner than later. Can you just attach it as a pdf? You could try pasting as plain text into notepad first.
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Aug 14, 2013 22:05
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Benny the Snake posted:Can anybody explain how I can format my .doc files directly into a GMail without having to go line by line and get rid of the extra spacing? It's tedious as heck. What extra spacing are you talking about? If you're talking about your cover letter, it should be single spaced with a blank space in between paragraphs. Since it's 4 paragraphs, there should only be 6 blank spaces you need to remove (including the one after Dear ___ and the ones around your Sincerely, Benny). Hardly tedious. If you want to copy/paste into an email without the formatting, use Ctrl+Shift+V. It makes what you're pasting plain text.
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Aug 14, 2013 22:07
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Nione posted:What extra spacing are you talking about? If you're talking about your cover letter, it should be single spaced with a blank space in between paragraphs. 6 backspaces is a lot of work, man. Try saving it as HTML.* * may or may not require more than 6 clicks. E: estimate does not include arm movement. 
Burt Sexual fucked around with this message at 22:25 on Aug 14, 2013 |
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Aug 14, 2013 22:22
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Arsenic Lupin posted:I'm in the U.S. and I was never taught this rule. Yeah, I've never heard it either, and the sample cover letters I've seen in the industry I'm in tend to use the comma and colon interchangeably (the colon is perhaps somewhat more common, but I'm not sure it's a hard and fast rule).
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Aug 14, 2013 22:32
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Sir John Falstaff posted:Yeah, I've never heard it either, and the sample cover letters I've seen in the industry I'm in tend to use the comma and colon interchangeably (the colon is perhaps somewhat more common, but I'm not sure it's a hard and fast rule). We are officially at the forest for the trees now. Anyway, Benny who are you emailing the CV to?
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Aug 14, 2013 22:39
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Benny the Snake posted:Done and done; especially for the "on the spot" and "my name is" bits. The rest of it will take more time to get around since it's a habit but I'll kick it sooner than later. Disregarding both your grammar, spelling and the rest of the thread. This, right here, alone makes you unqualified to be an administrative assistant. Copy/paste it to a Google word doc and save it, so you only have to edit the spacing, line by line, once, as opposed to every time you send an email.
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Aug 14, 2013 22:52
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cname posted:Disregarding both your grammar, spelling and the rest of the thread. This, right here, alone makes you unqualified to be an administrative assistant. Actually I kind of disagree here. No one likes repeatedly doing boring tasks that a computer could do for you. If I ran into this and couldn't find an easy solution I'd probably figure out how to script it instead of just grinding it out each time. It takes more upfront investment which will pay off every future time you do similar tasks. This is also why I don't use word.
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Aug 14, 2013 22:58
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Benny the Snake posted:Can anybody explain how I can format my .doc files directly into a GMail without having to go line by line and get rid of the extra spacing? It's tedious as heck. You should have text and .doc versions of your resume as separate files, and keep them up-to-date all the time. You create the text file by opening Word, doing a Save As Text, then cleaning up the text by hand, doing things like turning bullets into asterisks and collapsing multiple spaces. To get it into Gmail, you copy-paste. If you prefer to do it by hand every time, go into Word, select all, copy, go into Gmail, open a compose window, right-click and select Paste As Plain Text. Then do the same cleanup I suggested in paragraph 1.
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Aug 14, 2013 22:59
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Could you not Google that? What happened with your family's landscaping gig? Where are you in securing assistance with paying for your meds?
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Aug 14, 2013 23:04
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Benny the Snake posted:Wait, I could've sworn I specified it was from January to March; so that's at least two months. So all this time you've had this resume/cv in your possession and you never looked at it close enough to notice the supposed This is the same careless, oblivious inattention to detail that has cost you so so many employment opportunities and if you don't figure out how to work on it, it will cost you many, many more in the future. Medication and therapy can help, but you need to make the effort to write the companies - as many others in this thread have offered advice on.
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Aug 15, 2013 04:50
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I too, would like to see a target paystub &or a pile of comics. Also, I’m not sure that comma after the word 'too' needs to be there, but it’s ok because I am not an English major applying for writing jobs (seriously though should it?). Also Benny I am super confused about this campaign work you did. One of my best friends at college was dating a girl who worked as a volunteer for a candidate during the 2008 election season which was coincidentally our freshman year. She was a PolySci major that used that work (canvassing, research, helping with general 'intern poo poo') to springboard her into one internship after another until she landed a pretty decent entry level position in government as an assistant. Maybe I have a different expectation of the ambitiousness of university students (I got a great job after school through my internship by being 'not poo poo' at it) but what did you ACTUALLY do for these people? If it was so short and made the pro resume guy think it was insignificant to warrant being put as volunteer work on your CV, what the hell did you actually do? I'm asking because of the 2/3 kids i knew in school that worked on political campaigns they are all still one way or another in that line of work. Can you please define campaign work for us? Where do you fall on the spectrum of "Putting up signs for free and making call center calls" to "Official Intern on the campaign assisting a manager of some sort". Or, on a scale of 1 to 10 how likely is it that someone of actual note in the campaign, someone the candidate knows by name, knows who you are/what you did? Or did you just hate politics and you’re not interested in it anymore? That would be fine too, I’m just curious. POSITVITY EDIT:Still rooting for you, I just want to know what the deal ACTUALLY is there. You made it sound like a big deal and I know for a fact that real internships with those campaigns are hard to get, and require you to be a great student.
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Aug 15, 2013 13:31
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AcidRonin posted:I too, would like to see a target paystub &or a pile of comics. Also, I’m not sure that comma after the word 'too' needs to be there, but it’s ok because I am not an English major applying for writing jobs (seriously though should it?). You only need a comma after 'too' if you have one after 'I', as in "I, too, would like to etc". In this situation, the 'too' becomes a parenthetical phrase.
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Aug 15, 2013 13:53
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I still haven't gotten my answer on what campaign collected email addresses you have and/or who they belong to. Do you know what networking is? I wanted to network with you and you ignored me. You could just be honest and say "No, cname, I don't give a gently caress about your contacts." Or "I spent the entire campaign doing the bare minimum, didn't meet anyone and have nothing to show for my work. Stop asking." Seriously, I'm jealous of who you might have access to and angry you won't work with me to hit up my people and let me hit up yours, for campaign jobs. Actually, it's not so much "angry that you won't". It's more to do with the fact that you won't even reply! Also, Facebook is advertising for canvassing jobs, in my area. Just throwing it out there that Facebook is advertising relevant work experience, yet here you are. Paystub on top of comics, Benny I've given advice, had said advice validated by others, then was ignored, by you on multiple occasions. I wanna make sure your not full of poo poo. cname fucked around with this message at 14:44 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 14:30
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cname posted:I still haven't gotten my answer on what campaign collected email addresses you have and/or who they belong to. I have a sinking feeling "worked for a campaign" means he picked up some free signs from someone who ACTUALLY worked for the campaign and then did some call center/canvassing work. This is guy is right Benny, if you did real work you should Network with those people. also Paystub on top of comics, Benny
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Aug 15, 2013 14:57
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The "Paystub on top of comics" isn't happening 'cause I'm too paranoid about giving out sensitive info like that (the paystub, of course). Also, I use OpenOffice, not Word. I've used Word for years though but one day I couldn't find my Microsoft Office '07 disk so I decided to use OpenOffice and haven't looked back since. Two interesting things happened yesterday. One, I have an interview for an editorial internship (I'm going) on Monday. Two, my old target is hiring for a cashier. Now I know going back to an employer who fired me sounds like a bad idea, but I have word from a manager who told me that I could come back during the holiday season as a cashier because I was that good. It's one of the few things I'm proud about my time at Target: I managed one redcard per shift scheduled as cashier. So I figure what do I have to lose: I'm gonna get in contact with that manager and see what happens. I'm not expecting them to hire me back, but it wouldn't hurt to ask.
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Aug 15, 2013 16:11
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Benny the Snake posted:The "Paystub on top of comics" isn't happening 'cause I'm too paranoid about giving out sensitive info like that (the paystub, of course). Also, I use OpenOffice, not Word. I've used Word for years though but one day I couldn't find my Microsoft Office '07 disk so I decided to use OpenOffice and haven't looked back since. Redact the personal info with Gimp or MS Paint, it is quite trivial given the amount of advice your getting. Also what in the loving name of all that is good is with: these: colons:?!
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Aug 15, 2013 16:14
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Benny the Snake posted:It's one of the few things I'm proud about my time at Target: I managed one redcard per shift scheduled as cashier. What is a redcard?
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Aug 15, 2013 16:15
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Pfirti86 posted:What is a redcard? Their lovely high interest rate credit card. Like 23% lovely, BUT you get 5% off your purchases at Target! They push them like Best Buy pushes service agreements.
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Aug 15, 2013 16:17
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Benny the Snake posted:The "Paystub on top of comics" isn't happening 'cause I'm too paranoid about giving out sensitive info like that (the paystub, of course). Also, I use OpenOffice, not Word. I've used Word for years though but one day I couldn't find my Microsoft Office '07 disk so I decided to use OpenOffice and haven't looked back since. 1. Blur out identifying information. 2. You ignored cname again. Stop ignoring cname.
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Aug 15, 2013 16:17
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Benny the Snake posted:The "Paystub on top of comics" isn't happening 'cause I'm too paranoid about giving out sensitive info like that (the paystub, of course). Blur your actual name out and MSPaint in "Benny the Snake", it takes like 10 loving seconds. Or use whiteout or scribble over it with a marker or something. When this whole thing started I was on your side, but you seem to be the living embodiment of .Darth123123 posted:Their lovely high interest rate credit card. Like 23% lovely, BUT you get 5% off your purchases at Target! They push them like Best Buy pushes service agreements. He might also be referring to the debit card they push. It also gets you 5% off, but I'm sure it comes loaded with bullshit fees for everything. E: Benny, at this point I hope you come out as a troll because the alternative is just too depressing. If it was trolling, it was some of the best I've ever seen and I'll be joining in on the slow clap. WampaLord fucked around with this message at 16:53 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 16:20
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Edit: Aw, gently caress it. You're either trolling or sporting a learning disability you haven't told us about.
Accretionist fucked around with this message at 17:00 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 16:48
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Benny, I don't understand why you keep applying to editorial positions. Your grammar is terrible. Your writing skills are terrible. You won't last a day in an editorial position. You should focus more on retail and the like until you learn better writing skills. I'm not saying to give up on your dream of being a successful author, but seriously, this is ridiculous.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:04
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CravingSolace posted:Benny, I don't understand why you keep applying to editorial positions. Your grammar is terrible. Your writing skills are terrible. You won't last a day in an editorial position. You should focus more on retail and the like until you learn better writing skills. I'm not saying to give up on your dream of being a successful author, but seriously, this is ridiculous.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:07
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Benny the Snake posted:The "Paystub on top of comics" isn't happening 'cause I'm too paranoid about giving out sensitive info like that (the paystub, of course). Also, I use OpenOffice, not Word. I've used Word for years though but one day I couldn't find my Microsoft Office '07 disk so I decided to use OpenOffice and haven't looked back since. Darth123123 posted:Redact the personal info with Gimp or MS Paint, it is quite trivial given the amount of advice your getting. This is all basic, problem solving. 1) I've told you 8 or 9 times to just edit out your personal information. We don't want it. 2) Other people have told you 8 or 9 times on top of my 8 or 9 times to edit your personal information. We don't want it. 3) Even if we didn't tell you 30 some-odd times. You couldn't even think independently enough to edit out your personal information (with freeware that shows up with a simple Google search) and give us what we need to assure ourselves you aren't trolling. You're either a troll, or you aren't capable of holding any job, anywhere, especially administration. That's why we want proof. You aren't a critical thinker. You aren't resourceful. You aren't self-motivated, self-aware or even logical in any sense of the word. You don't even think to open a new tab, Google what we're talking about, do a tad bit of independent learning and reply based on what you've learned. We've had to spoon feed you everything. We've actually typed your words into Google for you, clicked a semi-relevant article, reviewed it, posted it in your thread, for you, then you just flat out ignore it. That's why we think your a troll. Because, you may or may not be qualified/capable of a button pushing job. Just a big, red, single button you push, when it lights up. I'd be like "Benny, here's $100 an hour to push this big, red button, when it lights up." You'd reply with "Well, how many times is it going to light up? What happens if I don't push the button on time?!" cname fucked around with this message at 18:23 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 18:20
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Benny the Snake posted:It's an internship. I'll pick up a copy of "The Elements of Style" at my library today. Yeah, that'll solve all your problems. And while you're there you should ask for a copy of the biggest dictionary they carry so the librarian can beat the poo poo out of you with it.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:21
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Benny you are like Tuyop from BFC except he can somehow hold down a job. Have you considered joining the military? If a complete fuckup like Tuyop can make it there, maybe you can too. Granted, he was in the Canadian military, so maybe move to Canada first. I don't want you in our military. cname posted:Because, you may or may not be qualified/capable of a button pushing job. Just a big, red, single button you push, when it lights up.  "Guys, I got to my job and pushed the button right away before it was lit like I was supposed to! Later, it lit up, which was weird, I think I remember someone telling me about what to do when it lit up, but I couldn't remember and ignored it. Now I'm fired, should I apply at Target again?"
WampaLord fucked around with this message at 18:25 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 18:22
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Benny the Snake posted:The "Paystub on top of comics" isn't happening 'cause I'm too paranoid about giving out sensitive info like that (the paystub, of course). Use your office skills to MS paint a box over your name. How is this not super loving obvious, if not assumed?
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Aug 15, 2013 18:24
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Benny the Snake posted:It's an internship. I'll pick up a copy of "The Elements of Style" at my library today. "The Elements of Style" isn't going to teach you to be a better writer any more than quickly browsing GQ will help you "brush up on fashion" before the Abercrombie interview. If you want to become a good writer you're going to have to put years of painful effort into it. There's no quick fix.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:26
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"Hey Benny, post a picture of one of your pay stubs", even redacted, is the single stupidest idea I have read in this entire thread. And that includes "I'll just explain why I took the day off by telling them I was hung over."
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Aug 15, 2013 18:27
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/\ How is that retarded? He could redact everything! All I wanna see is a blue slip of paper with "Target" on it, on top of a pile of comic books. He can black out the check number, money amount, name, address, everything short of "Target Inc." or whatever company. Just a off white/light-blue slip of paper is good enough.Arch Stanton posted:Use your office skills to MS paint a box over your name. Because he's either a troll, or the only job he's capable of is renting his rear end in a top hat out to other men. Male prostitute wouldn't work out, because that would require a baseline level of thinking to come up with ideas for sexual activity. Renting his rear end in a top hat would just be 1) Pull down pants. 2) Lay down on stomach. 3) Wait. Benny, my roommate plays the violin, at subway stations, for change and he can make rent, every month. You're a rare breed. I seriously hope your an IT Helpdesk technician sitting in an office, writing trollposts, each time you close out all your tickets and have nothing left to do. cname fucked around with this message at 18:51 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 18:29
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cname posted:You aren't a critical thinker. You aren't resourceful. You aren't self-motivated, self-aware or even logical in any sense of the word. You don't even think to open a new tab, Google what we're talking about, do a tad bit of independent learning and reply based on what you've learned. We've had to spoon feed you everything. We've actually typed your words into Google for you, clicked a semi-relevant article, reviewed it, posted it in your thread, for you, then you just flat out ignore it. I'm honestly not sure what people are expecting to get out of the thread at this point. Benny has shown time and time again that he's only willing to put out the minimum amount of effort to survive. He's not begging for writing feedback or job tips- except for his family situation I don't think he's expressed any emotion or passion that would suggest he actually cares about getting ahead. The problem isn't his cover letter, or his grammar, or his appearance. It's him. And until he fixes the root of the problem, no amount of advice, contacts, or job leads is going to make a difference. Other than telling him to take his meds and talk to a counselor, nothing we say is going to make much of a difference.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:30
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in_cahoots posted:I'm honestly not sure what people are expecting to get out of the thread at this point.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:32
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Unless DustingDuvet is in on it, I don't think Benny is a troll. He literally paid a guy a lot of money (more than I would pay for the same service, unless I desperately needed it) for a resume, specifically for the purpose of getting writing jobs, all the while telling us that he isn't going to pursue writing except as a hobby (that he believes he should be getting paid to do.) Benny -- landscaping job? How did that "negotiation" go? How are you doing on securing your badly-needed psych drugs?
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Aug 15, 2013 18:41
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cname posted:That's why we think your a troll. Benny i am now 100 percent sure you are lying about almost everything here. Those loving colons are so obvious that I, a mere software developer that can barely spell words in his native tounge, know that is loving wrong. Paystub with redacted information, or some sort of proof you were ever employed by target, or I am quite convinced you are lying. You can redact EVERYTHING, i just want target letterhead and some comics in the photo. It's sad that i was rooting for you, but if this IS a troll, holy poo poo man you are brilliant. If your not a troll, see below \/\/\/\/ (i realize this is difficult to do, given my awesome xmas present of a title  )
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Aug 15, 2013 18:45
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Eris posted:Unless DustingDuvet is in on it, I don't think Benny is a troll. That exchange did seem to give validity to Benny's story. I guess it would be pretty  to still think he's a troll, but I have to hold out hope that no one is this big a fuckup.Benny, if you're being completely honest with us, then your only function in life right now is to stay on your medication and continue with therapy. That is your only chance of taking control of your life.
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Aug 15, 2013 18:45
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cname posted:/\ How is that retarded? He could redact everything! All I wanna see is a blue slip of paper with "Target" on it, on top of a pile of comic books. He can black out the check number, money amount, name, address, everything short of "Target Inc." or whatever company. Just a off white/light-blue slip of paper is good enough. 
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Aug 15, 2013 18:53
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The colon problem is a tic; I could overlook it in somebody I was hiring in a non-writing position. I, myself, overuse semicolons and always make a kill-the-semicolons editing pass. The genuine problem is sentences like Benny posted:Two, my old target is hiring for a cashier. Now I know going back to an employer who fired me sounds like a bad idea, but I have word from a manager who told me that I could come back during the holiday season as a cashier because I was that good. " I can rewrite that in 16 words: Bitchy editor posted:The Target I worked for needs a cashier, and my former manager told me to reapply. I've cut a lot of content, but it's superfluous. I can cut one more word by turning ", and" into a semicolon, but I don't trust Benny with sharp punctuation. Bitchy editor hat off. The urgent problem is continuing to take medication regularly (you are, right, Benny?) and showing up for therapy visits.
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Aug 15, 2013 19:05
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Arsenic Lupin posted:Bitchy editor hat off. The urgent problem is continuing to take medication regularly (you are, right, Benny?) and showing up for therapy visits. The last 'update' we ever heard on his medication situation was that he couldn't afford it, and when he was supplied with the means to contact the company that manufacturers the medication in order to get it at a reduced price or possibly free he never mentioned it again. Just like every other issue that's stopped him from doing literally anything in his life, the moment he's handed a solution the problem is never mentioned again and pointedly ignored. I wish e/n got mod challenges, because.. ugh. Also, cname, I don't know how long you've been following the thread but Benny did mention early on which campaign he worked for... Benny the Snake posted:... That Damn Satyr fucked around with this message at 19:54 on Aug 15, 2013 |
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Aug 15, 2013 19:43
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The saddest thing is that if the average goon was given a hundredth of the opportunities goons have extended to Benny here, from interviews with an almost certain offer at the end (can't detail) to offers to swap contacts and advice on how to leverage it, they'd be able to seize them and change their lives. Instead he's squandered them all and managed nothing more than a short term stint at Target.
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Aug 15, 2013 23:12
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