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hepscat posted:My son has ASD so it might not work with a neurotypical kid, but we use a visual schedule for mornings and it cuts out the fighting like magic. He has a chart with what is going to happen in the morning (go pee, pet the cat, breakfast, get dressed, brush teeth & hair, socks & shoes, backpack). For us it takes the arguing out of the morning ("I'm not hugry/I don't have to pee"). I wouldn't use it for everything but if you find yourself having the same fight at the same time of day, you might try something like that. I really need to try this with Izzy. She will fight us tooth and nail about every step of getting ready in the morning. Sticker charts and reward boards stopped working after potty learning. So Maybe this will help?
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Sep 19, 2013 19:47
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Everyone with a bright 5-7 year old posted:Our darling perfect children whom we would gladly take a bullet for are driving us FRICKIN NUTS God, what is it about mornings and that age. I have had a similar situation you've got with your boys. Vincent will, most days, get up get dressed eat quickly and then doodle around with his toys happy as a clam. Victor would dragass out of bed, try to climb in my bed, whine moan ask for help with every little thing down to putting toothpaste on his toothbrush and dawdle dawdle dawdle. We actually took him in for ADHD testing because the kid just COULD NOT FOCUS FOR MORE THAN LIKE FIVE MINUTES ON ANYTHING. Turns out his problem is he's very bright and he has mild ADHD (like, just enough to be a problem with boring repetitive tasks but not enough of a problem to get any help). And very bright kids are very... typical in some behaviors. So I am going to recommend y'all this book: A Parents Guide to Gifted Children It is good for anyone who thinks maybe their kid is as smart as you secretly believe him/her to be, how to tell from as early an age as possible (yes even infancy has some telltale signs) and what to do once you realize it. (Remember waaay back a few years ago when I mentioned Victor sprung the whole 'where do we go when we die' question on me at like age 3? Yeah, that's not supposed to happen until around 9-12 for the average kid. Hello, hindsight!) It also points out that gifted kids are SPECIAL NEEDS kids, just like kids with learning disabilities etc etc. and in order to reach their utmost potential they need advocacy and guidance as well as needing different parenting strategies because, as AlastairCookie has so recently found out, tips and tricks for kids their age tend to not work for long because they're operating at a level above their age, sometimes far above. I have a feeling some of your son's frustration is coming from being bored with the current level of stuff going on at daycare/school and his inability to perform up to his own internal standards (a lot have a tendency towards perfectionism), because gifted kids often KNOW about things they'd like to do well and understand how to do them intellectually before they're physically capable of doing it. Imagine wanting to learn how to knit, understanding the process, but your fine motor skills just aren't there yet. Or seeing a painting in your head that looks like the Mona Lisa and coming up with stick figures. They also tend to want to run their own show, as it were. Letting your kid come up with his own morning routine may help with the power struggle and make him more likely to stick with it. WRITE IT DOWN and post it somewhere to help remind him if he's the scatterbrained type. One of the other issues with gifted kids is they tend to be natural lawyers and can sometimes out-logic their parents. They are also stubborn as all hell and if you can't make your case in a way that makes sense to them then to hell with you they are going to do it their way. This will surely serve them well when they are actual adults in the real world but as a five year old? Yeah. They also tend to have an overdeveloped sense of fairness and get very indignant about anything they perceive as unfair. And the questions. Jesus God the questions. The endless, endless, endless questions. It gets a little better once they learn how to read and can start looking stuff up themselves. Guinness books of world records and the tv show How Its Made are sanity savers. Also Where's My Water (iphone/pad game) and puzzle games in general. Also lots and lots of strenuous physical exercise. Helps them go to sleep (oh yeah, gifted kids need less sleep, and also tend to have a really hard time calming that racing brain so have a harder time falling asleep and staying asleep! HOORAY.) and can help them develop those motor skills to avoid future frustration. Its also really hard to ask questions when you're out of breath. Solo sports like gymnastics and martial arts tend to work better because they can go at their own pace and still have camaraderie with kids their own age and they're constantly learning new things to do, which will help keep their interest. Two really good techniques that have been working amazingly well with Victor: catch your kid doing something right, and tell them in advance how much you like the behavior they're about to exhibit. 1. Catch your kid doing something right: 'I see you are taking your plate to the sink! That is so helpful!' 'Do you already have your coat on without me even asking? Awesome! You're really getting good at getting ready to leave the house' etc etc. 2. Liking the behavior you want them to exhibit BEFORE they do it: *just before its time to eat dinner* I really like how well you wash your hands before dinner. (nine times out of ten kid goes to wash hands, you may need to go with and watch) *instead of telling him its time to set the table* 'You know, you always set the table so carefully. It makes me proud to see that you care about doing a good job.' *time to stop playing and pick up the toys* *kid picks up another toy to play with it* 'I see you already know its time to put the toys away! Do you remember where that one goes? Can you show me?' You get the idea. There's tons more but yeah, most libraries have that book its apparently the gold standard and a lot of the info is repeated in various other books but that's the one with the most comprehensive overview. A lot of the parenting tips are good general-purpose tips too.
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Sep 20, 2013 07:06
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AlistairCookie posted:Liam is two and a half (did I just type that?!) and we couldn't be farther away from potty training. I don't think he has the vaguest concept--I was going to give it a try closer to three. Two and a half is not an unreasonable age at all, but it is pretty little yet; I just wouldn't sweat the regression. I didn't even bother to start with Tim until he was three. He just wasn't interested, and as a bonus was unconcerned with the state of his diaper. Pee running down his leg? No worries. And I cloth diapered Tim until he started nursery school! What was that bit about cloth diapered children train sooner because they can feel they're wet or messy? Ha! They have to care for that to work. Liam is the same way. I am dreading starting him, considering how much of a hassle Tim was (and sometimes continues to be) about it. Our #1 monkey was ready to quit daytime diapers when he was about three years and 1.5 months. Specifically, during the first week after he became a big brother to #2 monkey. This was late summer/early fall, and we'd spent some time that summer on introductory practice (letting him walk around naked in the back yard and pee on the hedge, letting him wear big-boy underpants for a few hours and simply accepting that they'd end up drenched, and so on). During that first week as a big brother he also moved into his own bedroom and (voluntarily, completely on his own initiative) gave up the pacifier. And, as I said initially, he went from being able to let us know he needed to pee right as the water was flowing, to suddenly giving enough notice to get to the bathroom, pull down his pants and place him on the throne. Pretty soon it wasn't generally necessary to drop whatever you were doing and rush straight into action, either, as he could hold it in for a rapidly-increasing number of minutes after giving notice. Oh, I guess I haven't posted in these threads for a couple of years. These are my monkeys, and the most recent good photographs we have of them both together: Late May, 2013. Playground time.  August, 2013. Holiday in Spain.  These Norwegian monkeys are Sigurd, born in July 2008, and Eivind, born in September 2011. Both now go to the same daycare (it's Sigurd's last year before entering school). Sigurd is extremely strong-willed; smart, but near-impossible to motivate for anything he doesn't see the point in himself; slightly immature in social development (but catching up); huge for his age, so people often mistake him for being older than five. Eivind is a happy little dude except for brief flashes of being very angry when things don't go his way; provides a running commentary track to absolutely everything that goes on around him (in sentences of often five or more words); wants to do everything his big brother can do. Both have been exclusively cloth diapered, and we've made extensive use of mei tais and such (still do when we need to walk a significant distance with Eivind along). They're a pretty cool little crew, and there's a little sister (we think) coming this winter.
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Sep 20, 2013 12:35
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Groke posted:Our #1 monkey was ready to quit daytime diapers when he was about three years and 1.5 months. Specifically, during the first week after he became a big brother to #2 monkey. This was late summer/early fall, and we'd spent some time that summer on introductory practice (letting him walk around naked in the back yard and pee on the hedge, letting him wear big-boy underpants for a few hours and simply accepting that they'd end up drenched, and so on). During that first week as a big brother he also moved into his own bedroom and (voluntarily, completely on his own initiative) gave up the pacifier. And, as I said initially, he went from being able to let us know he needed to pee right as the water was flowing, to suddenly giving enough notice to get to the bathroom, pull down his pants and place him on the throne. Pretty soon it wasn't generally necessary to drop whatever you were doing and rush straight into action, either, as he could hold it in for a rapidly-increasing number of minutes after giving notice. Gosh man, I LOVE your kids' names  Especially Eivind, I have always wanted to use that for a boy, but then I went and found myself a husband named Eivind, soooo.VVV Hahah nah he was weirded out by the idea :P We ended up with an Åsmund instead, which is a name I'm super happy with. bilabial trill fucked around with this message at 13:27 on Sep 20, 2013 |
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Sep 20, 2013 13:15
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rectal cushion posted:Gosh man, I LOVE your kids' names Oh come on, like he wouldn't've loved to sire a little Eivind junior. v v v Dude, I'm so Norwegian my name is Kari. Sockmuppet fucked around with this message at 14:45 on Sep 20, 2013 |
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Sep 20, 2013 13:17
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Sockmuppet posted:Oh come on, like he wouldn't've loved to sire a little Eivind junior. Naming kids after yourself is... not exactly common in Norway. Only done to any extent in certain very particular socio-economic groups. Naming them after grandparents or great-grandparents, now, that's very much a done thing. For example I myself am named after both of my grandpas, but I digress.
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Sep 20, 2013 13:30
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Alistair is 8 months now and he is finally coming around to accepting me as the rad dude that I am! Question for you all however, he loves destroying things and putting things in his mouth that are not baby toys. What can I give him that he can destroy and put in his mouth that is also safe?
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Sep 20, 2013 23:37
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SmokeyXIII posted:Question for you all however, he loves destroying things and putting things in his mouth that are not baby toys. What can I give him that he can destroy and put in his mouth that is also safe? Giant blocks or huge legos or stacking rings. Stuff like that.
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Sep 20, 2013 23:57
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VorpalBunny posted:Giant blocks or huge legos or stacking rings. Stuff like that. I guess stuff that he can't break down to choking size.
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Sep 21, 2013 00:24
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SmokeyXIII posted:I guess stuff that he can't break down to choking size. Stuff like this?  Take your pick: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=infant+blocks
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Sep 21, 2013 00:35
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SmokeyXIII posted:I guess stuff that he can't break down to choking size. Duplos aren't a choking hazard, but if you feel they're too big, you could search for Quattros. I think they're double the size.
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Sep 21, 2013 00:39
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SmokeyXIII posted:Alistair is 8 months now and he is finally coming around to accepting me as the rad dude that I am! Quite possibly he is teething? In addition to toys, maybe try some teething rings. I am also a big fan of those mesh things you can fill with ice cubes or frozen fruit (grapes work great, never put a banana in there because it's impossible to clean out).
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Sep 21, 2013 02:45
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frenchnewwave posted:never put a banana in there because it's impossible to clean out). Truth! Frozen watermelon is our boy's favorite right now.
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Sep 21, 2013 03:33
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ChloroformSeduction posted:I know there's been a few other parents with kids who have an ASD diagnosis... I guess my question for anyone who has been through this is how much to the diagnosticians rely on their own observations, and how much on what the parents report? Hey I saw this and forgot to add my two cents. How old is your son again? We are still going through the evaluation process but the first evaluations do definitely incorporate the parents' comments. We had to fill out pages and pages of questions about his behavior and our concerns. Some of it was just free-form but there was another part that rating his actions on a scale, like how likely is he to ____? They also had his preschool teacher fill out the same forms. That part of the assessment (the parts not done by trained experts, but by parents or other caregivers) came out with findings worked like "autism - likely" "autism - possible". So they are taken into consideration because of your close knowledge of your child, but as just one factor in the whole picture. And definitely not considered a diagnosis.
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Sep 21, 2013 05:54
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Oracle posted:MY GENIUS CHILD You've just described every neurotypical kid I've ever known. I don't think that means they're gifted. (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Sep 21, 2013 20:07
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Sockmuppet posted:Oh come on, like he wouldn't've loved to sire a little Eivind junior. Cool. It's still a pretty weird thing to name your kid after yourself. Naming kids isn't especially easy; it has to be something that sounds good and fits the kid in question, and at the same time we always want to avoid the overly popular names so our kid doesn't end up sharing a name with three classmates.
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Sep 21, 2013 20:49
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I gave Rory some baby oatmeal yesterday and this morning and now he's super constipated and pooping out tiny little hard nuggets  I have him some diluted prune juice, a warm bath, and tummy rubs but there's still been no proper poop. Any tips?
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Sep 21, 2013 20:57
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Dandy Shrew posted:I gave Rory some baby oatmeal yesterday and this morning and now he's super constipated and pooping out tiny little hard nuggets I've been told lots of water, pear juice or high fibre fruits such as peaches or apricots might help.
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Sep 21, 2013 21:14
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A little malt extract might help grease the groove, so to speak. Worked on both our kids, at least.
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Sep 21, 2013 22:01
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Dandy Shrew posted:I gave Rory some baby oatmeal yesterday and this morning and now he's super constipated and pooping out tiny little hard nuggets I've always had better luck with the pureed prunes (stage 1) than the juice. Maybe try that?
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Sep 22, 2013 04:27
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bamzilla posted:I've always had better luck with the pureed prunes (stage 1) than the juice. Maybe try that? Poop. Everywhere.
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Sep 22, 2013 09:40
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Dandy Shrew posted:Poop. Everywhere. Alexandra likes prunes and such things. At worst, it keeps her regular. That said, she's on solid food, so having a poop is much cleaner.
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Sep 22, 2013 15:38
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Stupid question, I'm sure, but I'm asking anyways - today's high is 77, in the mid 50s right now. We're going on a play date at the zoo in about 2 hours. When it will be 65ish. My question is - what do I dress C in? I've got him in a long john type onesie, pants, a hat, socks and shoes. But do I throw a jacket on too? Gloves? I ask because I am a wimp who's cold at anything below 80, so I have no clue.
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Sep 22, 2013 16:03
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Lullabee posted:Stupid question, I'm sure, but I'm asking anyways - today's high is 77, in the mid 50s right now. We're going on a play date at the zoo in about 2 hours. When it will be 65ish. The nice thing about dressing in layers is that you can always take things off when it gets too warm. Also, remember that your little booger has an extra layer of blubber meant to keep him warm.
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Sep 22, 2013 16:10
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I really don't think gloves are necessary for weather in the 60s-70s. That isn't cold weather.
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Sep 22, 2013 16:33
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GoreJess posted:I really don't think gloves are necessary for weather in the 60s-70s. That isn't cold weather. Didn't think so, but figured it didn't hurt to ask. I'm gonna throw a light jacket on him before we leave. He should be alright. Thanks everyone.
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Sep 22, 2013 17:15
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He's your baby. So he's like you. Just go by if you're cold he's cold. If you're hot he's hot. Wear the same number of layers. That's a good starting point. Then you adjust from there. I'm in Los Angeles so that's our typical weather. I'd have my boy in diaper, pants, shirt, hooded sweatshirt. The sweatshirt would probably come off at some point.
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Sep 22, 2013 17:57
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Lullabee posted:Stupid question, I'm sure, but I'm asking anyways - today's high is 77, in the mid 50s right now. We're going on a play date at the zoo in about 2 hours. When it will be 65ish. My pediatrician always says that the general rule of thumb is to dress your kids in one more layer than what you're wearing to be comfortable. It seems to work out really well for us during the winter. The only thing to consider right now in fall-ish weather is that little ones will be rear facing so take that in to consideration when layering as it can get super hot pretty quickly.
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Sep 22, 2013 18:06
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Arrrrgh. My son's baby teeth just absolutely refuse to fall out at all. He's got a molar trying to come up, and the tooth above it isn't budging. So now it's at an angle, with the roots exposed above the gum line. He is going to need braces something serious. At least it doesn't hurt. Which I only know because it got noticed about the second pass in with a toothbrush. Either that, or he is the most stoic child EVER. I am really not looking forward to autism + braces.
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Sep 23, 2013 01:22
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If any of you are parents who live in Chicago --- Chicago apparently has a bad "lead in the drinking water" problem according to a report just released by the EPA. https://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/ct-met-0925-lead-in-water-gfc-eps-20130925,0,6730582.graphic
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Sep 25, 2013 21:03
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Knockknees posted:If any of you are parents who live in Chicago --- Chicago apparently has a bad "lead in the drinking water" problem according to a report just released by the EPA. I'm not in Chicago but I've always been wary of the tap water in my house. The community water reports are fine but the house is 100+ years old. Is there some way to test? I have no clue if I have lead pipes.
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Sep 26, 2013 01:11
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You can buy lead testing kits on amazon or I bet you can request something from your local water authority too.
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Sep 26, 2013 02:48
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frenchnewwave posted:I'm not in Chicago but I've always been wary of the tap water in my house. The community water reports are fine but the house is 100+ years old. Is there some way to test? I have no clue if I have lead pipes. Call the Safe Drinking Water people in your area and they can give you a list of certified labs in the area that will test for you. Or you can try Googling for labs that do water testing. Ask your water company if they use anything for corrosion control. If they do, the water shouldn't be so corrosive it would eat the pipes anyway. If you're worried about lead let the water run for a minute before you use it for drinking or cooking to let water that's been sitting in lead pipes run out.
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Sep 26, 2013 03:32
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Daughter (3) has a habit of landing on her elbows when she falls. Thought nothing of it, but yesterday at nursery she tripped & landed on her elbows... It swelled up, she couldn't move her arm, so 8 hours in the hospital, x-ray, and we find out she has broken one of the bones in her elbow So, once it is fixed, I need to teach her how to land her falls better. Any ideas?
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Sep 26, 2013 10:00
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frenchnewwave posted:I'm not in Chicago but I've always been wary of the tap water in my house. The community water reports are fine but the house is 100+ years old. Is there some way to test? I have no clue if I have lead pipes. We moved into a house built in 1910 and did a quick test from the hardware store first and then contacted the local EPA for a certified lab before we tried to get pregnant. We're safe but thankfully a water system to combat lead is pretty economical if you need it.
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Sep 26, 2013 15:47
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We just put our kids in daycare/preschool and one of them absolutely hates it. Kind of a long post but I hope to get some perspective. I have been working part-time and staying at home most of the time with our 2 kids. One is a bit over 3 years and the other is almost 2 years old. When I work, typically a relative comes to our house to watch them (grandma, aunt, etc). Sometimes they go to the relative's house, but most often the relative comes here. I have been taking both kids to the gym (Kid Center thing) with me since they were just infants. 2-3 times per week, for 45-60 minutes, so that they would have some socialization with other kids. Both of my kids enjoy their time at the gym Kid Center. They also go to parks and play outside with neighbor kids, but no formal daycare. Last week, we started our kids 2 days/week at a daycare/preschool. The intention is to add a 3rd day when I find a suitable full-time job, family to watch them the other 2 days. The 3 year old enjoys it, and looks forward to going back. The 2 year old, however, absolutely hates it. His first day there, he didn't cry when being dropped off, but he appeared very apprehensive. When we picked him up, ~8 hr later, we were told he didn't eat or drink anything, and also didn't nap (he takes a ~90 minute nap at home). He was screaming and bawling the moment he saw us when we picked him up. He was miserable the rest of that day and the following day, which he stayed at home with me. The 2nd and 3rd days at daycare (today is the 4th), he starts bawling and clinging onto me as hard as he can as soon as he sees the building. When I set him down inside, he immediately tries to run over to me. He has to be comforted by the staff so that I can leave, all the while he is bawling. He still won't drink out of their cups, but he will drink if we send along a cup from home. He doesn't eat much and still bawls when we pick him up in the afternoon. The staff assures me that each day he is in a slightly better mood, after being dropped off, and that he is having more and more fun each day. However, all I see is him bawling when I drop him off and again bawling when I pick him up. Anyone else go through this, when you suddenly start your toddler in daycare?
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Sep 26, 2013 20:37
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johnny sack posted:Anyone else go through this, when you suddenly start your toddler in daycare? Our son has been in day care since he was 3 months old (18 months old now), so we never saw it with him, but we do see it every time he gets a new friend on his classroom. It usually takes about 2 weeks for the toddlers to get used to things. Heck, every once in a while when David is feeling sensitive, I need to give him extra hugs before I can leave. Totally normal, I'd only be worried if the crying got worse.
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Sep 26, 2013 23:03
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OzyMandrill posted:Daughter (3) has a habit of landing on her elbows when she falls. Thought nothing of it, but yesterday at nursery she tripped & landed on her elbows... It swelled up, she couldn't move her arm, so 8 hours in the hospital, x-ray, and we find out she has broken one of the bones in her elbow When you learn safe falls in judo/bjj/aikido you're taught to fall on your back and slap the mat with your hands to help dissipate the force of the fall. Sounds like she' falling on her side or front though, yeah? Maybe teach her to tuck and roll. Also, asking your doctor for a referral for a PT is not a bad idea as that seems pretty unusual and may be evidence of compensation for something. johnny sack posted:
At my daughter's school, they recommend having the more clingy kids go through the carpool line, they claim it helps with the separation anxiety better. If that's not an option, maybe your older child can walk the younger to the classroom, or vice-versa? FordCQC fucked around with this message at 23:55 on Sep 26, 2013 |
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Sep 26, 2013 23:52
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johnny sack posted:Anyone else go through this, when you suddenly start your toddler in daycare? This school year I started my 2 year old with two mornings a week and he acts like the sky is falling. The first couple weeks, it was balls out wailing at drop off and they had to peel him off of me. Cried 50% of the morning while he was there. It has improved to the point that just this morning, he only whined a little bit, and didn't cry. And has been having crying free days, aside from one or two minutes after drop off, for the past couple weeks.  He'll get there, and the staff goes through this sort of thing all the time. Comfort yourself with the knowledge that you know you are leaving him in a safe and happy place--it is not in fact some gulag, even though they act like it is. 
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Sep 27, 2013 00:51
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Today he apparently only cried for about a minute after I left. When I picked him up, I was able to observe him playing outside with one of the staff and the other toddlers. He was participating in their games and having a good time, smiling and playing. As soon as he saw me, he got all worked up and ready to start crying, fully ready to go home. So it is improving, a little bit more each day.
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Sep 27, 2013 06:49
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