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Sacrilage posted:Like all things in the military, I have a feeling manning levels play a big deal in this. We had 4 guys do something very, very hosed up on our sub; three got the immediate boot, because their rating was overmanned, and one just got shuffled into another sub that needed the billet filled. Bullshit, per usual. There were boats on the waterfront that lost whole divisions to drug busts. And, reportedly, boats that should have, but didn't. The reasoning was very opaque.
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Oct 23, 2013 04:53
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What about marijuana use in Afghanistan by US troops? Isn't there a poo poo ton of weed grown there?
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Oct 23, 2013 05:13
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Mustang posted:What about marijuana use in Afghanistan by US troops? Isn't there a poo poo ton of weed grown there? Yeah, they grow a lot of pot there. Just depends on to what extent a person will go to avoid getting caught. There aren't any piss tests there unless your unit think you're smoking up.  We had some guys in my company get caught smoking pot with the ANBP or ANP. They got put on post/gunny's bitch for the remainder and didn't suffer any legal repercussions. There probably wasn't enough evidence other than some testimony by retard ANBP/ANA guys.
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Oct 23, 2013 05:18
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Mustang posted:What about marijuana use in Afghanistan by US troops? Isn't there a poo poo ton of weed grown there? to the best of my knowledge they don't test for it because they know guys will pop.
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Oct 23, 2013 06:12
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Reverand maynard posted:to the best of my knowledge they don't test for it because they know guys will pop. At bigger bases like KAF and BAF they do command-directed testing sometimes. But you actually have to twist the arms of the lab to do it with appropriate chain of custody and all that. For the most part we were able to talk commanders out of it since we were officially incapable of doing it the right way for legal purposes.
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Oct 23, 2013 14:27
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Derek Dominoe posted:At bigger bases like KAF and BAF they do command-directed testing sometimes. But you actually have to twist the arms of the lab to do it with appropriate chain of custody and all that. For the most part we were able to talk commanders out of it since we were officially incapable of doing it the right way for legal purposes. My strangest experience with the whole drug thing was having a guy we knew was selling drugs but didnt bust him because NCIS was trying to figure out how he was getting supplied and who he was distributing it to. We figured there was no way he'd ever be dumb enough to use the stuff he was dealing (cocaine) and indeed he never popped on any urinalysis. One day he checked out the duty vehicle to go pick up some supplies and backed into another car in the parking lot. No major damage but I had him sent to medical for a fit for duty screening and lo and behold he popped positive for cocaine. Still couldn't do anything other than ADSEP him with a general characterization since the positive result was off a fit for duty screening. The reason we knew he was dealing drugs is because of a special brand of idiot who bought from him that I might write about in another post.
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Oct 23, 2013 16:39
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Let's see... Had a buddy of mine that claimed he could never turn down a dare, which is a stupid thing to say to a bunch of Infantrymen. He had been dipping wintergreen skoal and using a 20oz Dr Pepper bottle as a spitter. We noticed that it was nearly full so naturally we dared him to drink all of it for $100. He chugged that entire bottle, never threw up, and collected that $100 like he was the king of the world. This man was 27 years old at the time and he is now a green beret. When I went to the 82nd the second time(gently caress me), I was given a mouth breathing rear end in a top hat of a joey. If you are from this area, you may be aware of an establishment called Elite Zone. It is an internet/gaming cafe in Fayetteville. The advertise absolutely ridiculous prices on computers and flat screen TVs, hoping to fish up mouth breathing joeys like the one I was taking care of. He purchased a 42" 1080p, an xbox 360, and a laptop from them for a total of something like $3500. He told me it was okay though because they had set him up with a payment plan...I poo poo you not it was 38% interest. This kid was an E-2. I called them up and actually got them to accept everything back. You can't help stupid though, this guy now has a local woman claiming he is the father of her soon to be born child. He will not get a paternity test because he says he loves her. He hosed her one time, using protection. She is someone else's ex-dependapautamus.
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Oct 24, 2013 19:13
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That reminds me of when some guy wandered into where I was working to talk to someone. He started talking about problems his computer was having. Paraphrasing he said "Windows is so dumb, it keeps talking about some sort of hardware failure. It's an alienware, so I know that's not right." Some people just have more dollars than sense.
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Oct 24, 2013 19:21
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Cojawfee posted:... Some people just have more dollars than sense. This describes that dude especially well because he was an E-2 making like $900 a month.
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Oct 24, 2013 19:26
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I knew an E...3 I think it was who pulled in something like $1300 or so a month, maybe less. Anyway point is, his stupid Camaro SS he bought with like nothing down and probably state maximum legal interest rate literally cost $150 a month less than what he made when you factored insurance into the equation. So after his car payment, car insurance, and phone bill he had something like $50 a month left over for gas and whatever else. If he ever got an Article 15 he'd be ruined, if he had an unexpected bill pop up he'd be ruined, if we had a loving class A inspection and he had to get his uniform dry cleaned and boots shined he'd be loving ruined. He also got SUPER defensive to the point of wanting to fight people over how stupid of a purchase this was. His first line supervisor, platoon sergeant, and commander all basically demanded he take the car back. He absolutely refused because "I'm willing to risk my life for this country, I deserve something that makes me happy." He was a mechanic. Eventually they gave up on trying to get him to give it back. For a while we actually thought he was just going to live the next five years of life on $50 a month and actually pay the drat car off. He said he was going to do it and acted all  about it.I remember one time we were having a white trash barracks party and he came up trying to get some beers off us. Someone told him to buy buy a six pack and then added "Oh wait, you'd have to overdraw your account probably" and handed him a beer. He flipped out and chucked the beer, and to be fair he really put some rear end into it because that loving bottle flew clear over the barracks and into the woods like 100 feet away, and stormed off. The ultimate gently caress you, and I swear he did this on purpose, was the CSM taking him off the deployment roster and replacing him with a female mechanic. He pretty much needed the deployment money and freaked out. He begged and begged to get put on the roster to go but our commander didn't want him (He was in the FSC and we were a line battery). By the time we got back to the states a year later the car was gone, he was an E1, was in the process of getting chaptered out for financial reasons and stealing. Yeah he started ganking poo poo when he fell behind on the car and got caught, which prompted him to get the first Article 15 and fall hopelessly behind on payments. gleep gloop fucked around with this message at 19:53 on Oct 24, 2013 |
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Oct 24, 2013 19:49
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I like hearing these stories. It makes me feel better about my stupid car financial stories. It sort of has to do with a car, so I'd like to talk about a guy that was in my shop for a short amount of time and in the air force way too long. I'll start off by saying this man's nickname was Residue. That should give a nice jumping off point to give you an idea what kind of person he was. I'll start with my first experiences with him coming into our shop and extrapolate on things that happened earlier after that. We were getting a new NCOIC who was coming from another shop that was the same career field. He showed up one day and he seemed like a cool guy (later found out he's kind of a douche, but not important to this story). That same morning some other guy was in the shop. Some fat guy eating a yogurt and a banana was sitting in a chair across the shop from me. I didn't get a good look at him, I figured he was in here waiting for someone. We found out he was also coming over to our shop. He didn't seem so bad at first, but I would quickly learn to change my mind. To describe him, he's like of like a troll. He's ugly, fat, has psoriasis or something. He smelled bad and someone once asked him if he brushed his teeth with farts because his breath was so bad. He was moved to our shop because working the hours of his other shop was ruining his life or something. He was given the stipulation that if he failed another PT test, he'd be kicked back to his old shop. He was attempting to be healthy, except he didn't get the concept that eating healthy didn't mean large quantities of healthy things. He would eat yogurt, but it was a whole pack of six at a time. He would eat a whole bunch of bananas. He once ate a whole tomato by itself. He was fat but I'm guessing he was still wearing the same sand shirts he got whenever he first bought ABUs. You know those underarmor shirts that are form fitting and stretchy? His shirts looked like that except they were normal shirts from clothing issue. He had problems with people telling him what to do. In our shop, whoever is in charge is based on who knows how to do the job the most instead of rank. For alarms jobs, there was an A1C who was the most experienced and would be in charge of them. Residue was a senior airman. The A1C told Residue to get a ladder, Residue said "I'm a senior airman, you're and A1C, you get the ladder." As if E4 vs. E3 is a gigantic deal. Ever since then, Residue had a problem with this airman and would try to mess with him and then cry if he got messed with back. He would sit and stare at the guy until the A1C said something then run to the NCOIC complaining about it. He wanted to be part of every job despite not knowing anything. He also couldn't learn anything. When he was later kicked out of our shop, he was still trying to memorize the different connectors for fiber optic cable. There's only four that are still used but he couldn't remember them. We would try to sneak out of the shop to do something and he would run along behind us. We were tasked to run a fiber across a building which meant dragging it along under the floor. This meant pulling up floor tiles every few feet, laying on the ground and dragging it along. Someone else did this and Residue would just lay on the ground as if he was doing something. Eventually I told him to just get up because he was just rolling on the ground doing absolutely nothing and people were trying to walk past him. Eventually we got to about where it needed to go and he just needed to pull it all through. For some reason he was put on the pulling end. The fiber went around two corners so I was at one corner and a buddy was at another and we made sure the fiber made it around the corners without being stretched out and broken. One guy pulled some slack down a long hallway, then he'd give me some slack then it would go off to where Residue was. He apparently decided he needed to pull with all his might while I desperately tried to get more slack from the other guy and also bang on the door to the room he was in to get him to stop. Luckily he didn't break anything. Eventually, he failed his PT test again. This meant he was getting kicked back to his old shop (and eventually out of the air force). One of the NCOs in my shop went up to him with a pair of very small diagonal cutters (tiny wire cutters) and told Residue that since he failed his PT test, he'd have to use the tiny cutters to cut his dick off. Residue of course ran off crying to the NCOIC about it like he always did. Eventually he was gone and kicked out of the air force. He came back later as an escort to take contractors around so they could do their work or whatever. He got even fatter, grew a patchy beard and was later fired for sleeping on the job. Other things he had done: After getting kicked back to his old shop, he failed another PT test. He came in to work with a box of popeye's. His supervisor slapped it out of his hands. Residue picked up the chicken and ate it anyway. He once poo poo his pants on the way to work. He walked up to a phone and called his shop to ask them what to do. We got a new Chief and she came around to the shops to talk to everyone. Turns out she used to be the first shirt several years before. She was a Master Sgt and Residue was a senior airman. She came back as a chief and he was still a senior airman. There was a guy in our shop who joined the air force and made it all the way up to staff sgt all while Residue was a senior airman. His wife looked the exact same as he did. His daughter was also kind of ugly. He apparently didn't like either of them. Rumor is that their daughter was playing in the street at a softball game and they argued with each other over who should go get her. He kept buying lovely cars. He had a lovely lancer which he replaced with a really old green minivan. I don't know why he bought it. I think he was jealous of someone else's lovely V6 mustang because he one time asked me if some mustang he was looking at was a good deal. It was some mid 90s V6 that clearly wasn't taken care of. After he was gone for a while someone mentioned they saw his name on some sort of arrests records website. We looked it up and it said he was arrested for indecency with a child by contact.
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Oct 24, 2013 22:51
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You know, if I poo poo myself before coming into work I'd probably call and lie about almost anything else happening before I told another man I poo poo my pants.
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Oct 24, 2013 23:09
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National Guard idiotsquote:An Army National Guardsman shot two others during a scuffle in a Tennessee armory on Thursday, sources told the Daily News. The more I hear about the Guard, the less I want to be anywhere near them.
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Oct 24, 2013 23:46
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At least it wasn't a murder suicide. http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Murder-suicide-suspected-in-pair-s-deaths-4907668.php
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Oct 24, 2013 23:51
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Cojawfee posted:At least it wasn't a murder suicide. The incident would be the first murder-suicide Joint Base San Antonio has had this year if it's confirmed. .... jesus
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Oct 25, 2013 01:22
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Stultus Maximus posted:The more I hear about the Guard, the less I want to be anywhere near them. Clearly the answer is to ban all firearms from the armory. When will people finally wake up and realize our entire bases need to be gun free?
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Oct 25, 2013 01:44
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Snowdens Secret posted:Clearly the answer is to ban all firearms from the armory. When will people finally wake up and realize our entire bases need to be gun free? I will write a letter to Diane Feinstein, we need our legislature to step in and protect us from ourselves!
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Oct 25, 2013 02:52
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Cloudy McPouty posted:I will write a letter to Diane Feinstein, we need our legislature to step in and protect us from ourselves! Or at least from Guardsmen.
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Oct 25, 2013 02:54
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Cloudy McPouty posted:I will write a letter to Diane Feinstein, we need our legislature to step in and protect us from ourselves! If the first sentence isn't I AM A WEALTHY WHITE BANKER she's not interested fyi
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Oct 25, 2013 02:57
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We had a guy that everybody thought was an idiot, drat did he prove us wrong. Dude went through a 12 and a 15 month deployment and didn't spend a goddamn dime. Didn't ever go out when we were home, split internet with like 4 other dudes in the barracks, basically saved a poo poo ton of money. All through that 15 monther we asked him what the gently caress he's so determined to save for, keeps saying he's going to buy a Bentley, he's going to buy a Bentley. And goddamn it if he didn't have enough when we got home to buy a used Continental GT, pretty much straight cash. I guess he's an idiot for not realizing he'd be paying maintenance on a $200k car, but still, he wins at life.
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Oct 25, 2013 05:31
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I mean, he set a goal and made it. I can't fault him at all for that.
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Oct 25, 2013 05:32
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He made a terrible goal, but it was still a goal. I don't think people factor in maintenance when they buy expensive cars.
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Oct 25, 2013 06:24
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Cojawfee posted:He made a terrible goal, but it was still a goal. I don't think people factor in maintenance when they buy expensive cars. Yeah, it's like when people win the lottery and buy million dollar homes. Any word on how much he got the bentley for?
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Oct 25, 2013 06:28
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A million dollar house is still worth a million dollars, though. An older exotic car can get amazingly worthless, especially if you let it get run down. You can very easily end with a car with minor problems that cost more to fix than the car is worth. That dude's still very much an idiot.
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Oct 25, 2013 06:49
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Snowdens Secret posted:A million dollar house is still worth a million dollars, though. An older exotic car can get amazingly worthless, especially if you let it get run down. You can very easily end with a car with minor problems that cost more to fix than the car is worth. let's see your bentley before you talk poo poo on dude
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Oct 25, 2013 07:15
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friend of the family DEATH TURBO posted:let's see your bentley before you talk poo poo on dude Seriously, dude made a goal, held to it, and now hes rollin in a Continental
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Oct 25, 2013 07:19
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its better than the child support payments you scrubs are paying
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Oct 25, 2013 07:47
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A Bentley probably wasn't the best idea but...well, I don't have a Bentley.
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Oct 25, 2013 12:14
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Dude should have gotten a Jaaaaaaaaaag. When's Top Gear coming back on?
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Oct 25, 2013 12:26
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Christmas at the earliest. If its anything like this year, the christmas special was in February.
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Oct 25, 2013 14:55
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If the dude was committed enough to save up for that Bentley, I'd like to think he was committed enough to learn to restore it himself on the cheap. I really do want to believe, because he'd be the redeemer of all the lost dumbass junior enlisted we've all known through the years. Shine on, Bentley Guy, and drive your Continental into the sunset.
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Oct 25, 2013 15:16
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Wild T posted:If the dude was committed enough to save up for that Bentley, I'd like to think he was committed enough to learn to restore it himself on the cheap. I really do want to believe, because he'd be the redeemer of all the lost dumbass junior enlisted we've all known through the years. Shine on, Bentley Guy, and drive your Continental into the sunset. And after the police come to unwrap the Bently's hood from the sunset he crashed into, he'll blow over the limit on the breathalyzer.
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Oct 25, 2013 16:04
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P.S. STILL COMPLETELY DEVOID OF MERIT
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friend of the family DEATH TURBO posted:let's see your bentley before you talk poo poo on dude One of my peers paid off his house in 5 loving years doing the same thing. He was still driving a piece of poo poo 1980-gently caress K-car the whole time.
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Oct 25, 2013 17:31
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Godholio posted:One of my peers paid off his house in 5 loving years doing the same thing. He was still driving a piece of poo poo 1980-gently caress K-car the whole time. One of my old roommates sent every penny he could back home, to his folks in Colombia. Someone noticed near the end of his six-year term that his very ratty underwear still had the stencils from boot camp. Apparently his family had an impressive estate with the earnings. Snowdens Secret fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Oct 25, 2013 |
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Oct 25, 2013 17:36
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Snowdens Secret posted:One of my old roommates sent every penny he could back home, to his folks in
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Oct 25, 2013 17:41
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Snowdens Secret posted:One of my old roommates sent every penny he could back home, to his folks in Columbia. Someone noticed near the end of his six-year term that his very ratty underwear still had the stencils from boot camp. Apparently his family had an impressive estate with the earnings. Jody's gotta live in style.
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Oct 25, 2013 17:42
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Fixed, thanks
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Oct 25, 2013 17:43
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It's PI getting the money from the Navy.
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Oct 25, 2013 17:58
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Pudgygiant posted:We had a guy that everybody thought was an idiot, drat did he prove us wrong. Dude went through a 12 and a 15 month deployment and didn't spend a goddamn dime. Didn't ever go out when we were home, split internet with like 4 other dudes in the barracks, basically saved a poo poo ton of money. All through that 15 monther we asked him what the gently caress he's so determined to save for, keeps saying he's going to buy a Bentley, he's going to buy a Bentley. And goddamn it if he didn't have enough when we got home to buy a used Continental GT, pretty much straight cash. I guess he's an idiot for not realizing he'd be paying maintenance on a $200k car, but still, he wins at life. Was this in SC? Because earlier in the year I saw a younger dude driving a Continental GT on Shaw AFB, and I just couldn't make any sense of it.
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Oct 26, 2013 01:36
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| # ? May 14, 2024 19:24 |
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pkells posted:Was this in SC? Because earlier in the year I saw a younger dude driving a Continental GT on Shaw AFB, and I just couldn't make any sense of it. My first trip to MEPS I saw an Acura NSX parked at the Burger King on base. I thought "hunh wonder which general owns-" out walks a cherry-fresh Air Force 2nd Lieutenant, BEEP BOOP on the key fob and off he goes.
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Oct 26, 2013 04:43
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