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Even more perfect than I envisioned.
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Dec 10, 2013 22:51
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There are only so many things you can stick your dick into before thought pops in your head to stick something into your dick. Most folks get to that point and realize it is hosed. But there are always a few that dont have that "Ow poo poo gently caress OUCH" scrote protecting instinct most men are born with.
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Dec 10, 2013 23:30
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christmas shopping and wrapping are done i just bent christmas shopping over and hosed it doggy style
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Dec 10, 2013 23:34
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I hope you wiped the boxes down afterward, otherwise it's going to be an awkward Christmas morning at the NOoo house
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Dec 10, 2013 23:37
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i can't get my christmas shopping done until like the 16th or 17th because of cash flow i got everything planned out i just gotta get monies all my gifts are probably gonna be late for christmas but whatever who cares
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Dec 10, 2013 23:38
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Crow Jane posted:I hope you wiped the boxes down afterward, otherwise it's going to be an awkward Christmas morning at the NOoo house it's just a little extra christmas cheer!
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Dec 10, 2013 23:38
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Carecat posted:Is it called sounding because of the screams? Urethral sounding is a medical procedure that involves inserting a probe called a "sound" into the urethra to stretch it or unblock a stricture. Gonorrhea used to be the most common cause of urethral stricture. The probes could also be used to detect stones in the bladder, before we had scans for that. I imagine screams were often involved.  Someone heard about all this and thought "That sounds like fun, I should try that".  So now if you GIS "urethral sounding" the first page of results includes a dude with a toothbrush stuck up his dick.  http://i.imgur.com/I0NR16O.jpg So sexy.
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Dec 10, 2013 23:39
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Dec 10, 2013 23:40
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Cosmo Sex tips: This one trick will make your man Lose his mind!
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Dec 10, 2013 23:41
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My mom is a social worker for mentally disabled adults. One of her clients loves sticking things up his penis, the worst was a pinwheel on a stick. She has to remember to keep an eye on her pen whenever she's around him.
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Dec 10, 2013 23:42
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VendaGoat posted:Cosmo Sex tips: This one trick will make your man Lose his mind! My favorite ridiculous Cosmo sex tip is the one where they tell you to basically give his dick an Indian burn. That or the one where they tell you to shake pepper into his nose while loving, it's a close contest
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Dec 10, 2013 23:50
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With Christmas just around the corner, I think men should stick with the "lightbulb in rear end" thing. It's just a little more festive.
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Dec 10, 2013 23:50
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I noticed like, 4 consecutive issues of cosmo suggested spanking your dude with a kitchen spatula. Cosmo is loving weird.
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Dec 10, 2013 23:51
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Cosmo seems to think dicks are way, way more complicated than they actually are. That or they have published so many sex tips that they have to keep making up increasingly bizarre ones to avoid repeating themselves
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Dec 10, 2013 23:56
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GrrrlSweatshirt posted:Cosmo seems to think dicks are way, way more complicated than they actually are. That or they have published so many sex tips that they have to keep making up increasingly bizarre ones to avoid repeating themselves THIS ONE HOT TRICK WILL DRIVE YOUR MAN WILD "touch his dick" TO MAKE THINGS EVEN CRAZIER "I dunno use your mouth I guess"
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Dec 10, 2013 23:57
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every cosmo sex tip: touch his penis
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Dec 11, 2013 00:01
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I once took an online cosmo sex quiz about whether your were a bore in the sack or not. According to them I got 90% of the answers wrong and was frigid as all hell. All the answers they marked wrong were where I picked stuff that was more adventurous than they expected, but cosmo didn't care. So yeah, I feel sorry for women who actually believe what cosmo tells them.
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Dec 11, 2013 00:09
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unless you indian burn his dick and claw his nuts you are a bore in the sack, sorry 
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Dec 11, 2013 00:11
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTQnUTgLssI
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Dec 11, 2013 00:16
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I think the fun of sex is kind of diminished when you resort to busting out special moves like you're in a fighting game or something.
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Dec 11, 2013 00:18
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Crow Jane posted:I think the fun of sex is kind of diminished when you resort to busting out special moves like you're in a fighting game or something. FATALITY
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Dec 11, 2013 00:19
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The key is to figure out how to
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Dec 11, 2013 00:25
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forward forward up up B oh drat I punched him in the mouth again, I gotta learn to fix my timing jeez
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Dec 11, 2013 00:25
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oh my gosh my big date is tomorrow 
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Dec 11, 2013 00:37
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How to please your man. Show up naked, bring alcohol and snacks.
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Dec 11, 2013 00:37
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Pick posted:oh my gosh my big date is tomorrow What are you going to wear? Hair up or down?
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Dec 11, 2013 00:38
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Crow Jane posted:What are you going to wear? Hair up or down? Down, probably. Otherwise, what's the point of having long hair?
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Dec 11, 2013 00:42
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you could cut it short and then be hotter just an idea
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Dec 11, 2013 00:42
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Pick posted:Down, probably. Otherwise, what's the point of having long hair? Putting it up so you can release it later, when you're both naked. I miss having long hair sometimes.
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Dec 11, 2013 00:44
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Sex is the right time to have it bound up, though, otherwise inconsiderate fucks tug on it (purposefully or accidentally).
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Dec 11, 2013 00:45
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I got a date myself  with a test that will determine my future 
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Dec 11, 2013 00:49
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True, and depending on how athletic the sex is, you could end up with some serious tangles. I used to love surprising people with the sheer bulk of my hair, though
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Dec 11, 2013 00:49
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boom boom boom fucked around with this message at 06:21 on Jul 11, 2014 |
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Dec 11, 2013 00:49
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Crow Jane posted:True, and depending on how athletic the sex is, you could end up with some serious tangles. I used to love surprising people with the sheer bulk of my hair, though the Neck Tangle 
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Dec 11, 2013 01:06
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You know, there is something to be said about seeing a woman exhausted and disheveled after a good romp.
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Dec 11, 2013 01:08
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boom boom boom fucked around with this message at 06:21 on Jul 11, 2014 |
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Dec 11, 2013 01:09
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VendaGoat posted:You know, there is something to be said about seeing a woman exhausted and disheveled after a good romp. There's something to be said for *being* exhausted and disheveled after a good romp. A little achiness is also kind of nice afterwards
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Dec 11, 2013 01:10
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VendaGoat posted:You know, there is something to be said about seeing a woman exhausted and disheveled after a good romp. Most satisfying thing as a dude is to exhaust someone else. But drat, I forgot all about Cosmo. I used to read my sister's copies when I was a kid. I wonder if they are still the same rehashes today.
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Dec 11, 2013 01:12
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There's something to be said for getting really energized and then going out into the darkness and exsanguinating goats
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Dec 11, 2013 01:13
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| # ? May 31, 2024 08:33 |
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Pick posted:There's something to be said for getting really energized and then going out into the darkness and exsanguinating goats Just want to remind you that dudes read this thread too, and we don't want too many lady secrets getting out
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Dec 11, 2013 01:14
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