RESOURCE- Ask Us About Joining The US Military!

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MancXVI: Feb 14, 2002

Feeble posted:

So I'm kind of considering joining a branch of the military, don't know which yet because my life atm is kind of going downhill. I'm midway through college but most likely I'm going to drop out soon because I've been a lazy gently caress up who procrastinates way too much for my own good, which means my parents sure as hell aren't going to continue paying my tuition. I'm kind of leaning towards national guard right now because looking at their education benefits on http://usmilitary.about.com/ they apparently cover 100% of the cost for Ohio state schools which is what I'm attending. I assume their coverage depends on what kind of degree I'm going for but since that's medical technology I don't really see that being an issue. My only real reservation about it right now is that, simply put, I'm a scrawny motherfucker with the muscle mass of a rubber band which is obviously something I'd need to fix before hand. Honestly I kind of feel like the reason I've been procrastinating so much is that I've kind of been going through a slump for well...the past few years really, and I feel forcing myself to go through basic training and being shouted at by a drill sergeant might actually be just the thing to pull me out of it and help me get back on track.

Am I being a massive idiot for even considering this or does this actually seem remotely feasible? Obviously I'm happy to provide more information if you guys need it to chew me out.

Is there a mental health clinic at your university?

# ? Dec 19, 2013 22:16

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# ? May 29, 2024 06:18

InequalityGodzilla: May 31, 2012

I'll just come out and say that I'm at Cleveland State University to hopefully make this a bit easier for anyone looking to help me and yes it does seem to have something of that sort.

http://www.csuohio.edu/cehs/departments/CASAL/coun_clinment.html

http://www.csuohio.edu/offices/health/

Edit: Or are you just saying I'm crazy for even considering this...?

# ? Dec 19, 2013 22:24

bloops: Dec 31, 2010; Thanks Ape Pussy!

Stay in school you loving dork. Don't be an idiot.

# ? Dec 19, 2013 22:27

Stultus Maximus: Dec 21, 2009; USPOL May

Feeble posted:

So I'm kind of considering joining a branch of the military, don't know which yet because my life atm is kind of going downhill. I'm midway through college but most likely I'm going to drop out soon because I've been a lazy gently caress up who procrastinates way too much for my own good, which means my parents sure as hell aren't going to continue paying my tuition. I'm kind of leaning towards national guard right now because looking at their education benefits on http://usmilitary.about.com/ they apparently cover 100% of the cost for Ohio state schools which is what I'm attending. I assume their coverage depends on what kind of degree I'm going for but since that's medical technology I don't really see that being an issue. My only real reservation about it right now is that, simply put, I'm a scrawny motherfucker with the muscle mass of a rubber band which is obviously something I'd need to fix before hand. Honestly I kind of feel like the reason I've been procrastinating so much is that I've kind of been going through a slump for well...the past few years really, and I feel forcing myself to go through basic training and being shouted at by a drill sergeant might actually be just the thing to pull me out of it and help me get back on track.

Am I being a massive idiot for even considering this or does this actually seem remotely feasible? Obviously I'm happy to provide more information if you guys need it to chew me out.

Read the OP. There's a flow chart for cases just like you.

# ? Dec 19, 2013 22:28

iyaayas01: Feb 19, 2010; Perry'd

/\

I refer to the flowchart in the OP, specifically the right side....

"Can you get or finish a 4 year degree? -> No -> Is it because you are a lazy douchebag? -> Yes -> 1. The military has enough lazy douchebags. 2. You'll hate life from day one. Wake the gently caress up."

So you need to wake the gently caress up, pull your head out of your rear end, and finish your degree. The military isn't some magical life changing event that presto-chango makes you into a Real American Man^tm, if you are a lazy gently caress up now all you will be in the military is a lazy gently caress up who gets yelled at and who has some other lazy gently caress up control literally every aspect of their life.

The suggestion to go see a mental health professional is a good one, that is the correct way to figure out a solution to whatever is currently ailing you, not raising your right hand and signing over years of your life to an institution that does not give a gently caress about you and is run by idiots.

# ? Dec 19, 2013 22:29

shyduck: Oct 3, 2003

Join the Marines.

# ? Dec 19, 2013 22:40

Hekk: Oct 12, 2012; 'smeper fi

shyduck posted:

Join the Marines.

gently caress Yeah!! Do it.

Also, don't buy the 100 percent in state tuition bullshit the National Guard will try to sell you. If you look closely at the fine print, the tuition assistance is offered until the pot of money set aside is gone. Take a guess how quickly that money disappears. Then guess how many Ohio National Guardsmen actually get all their tuition paid for.

If you enlist, it will take 6-8 years before your life isn't controlled by other retards who were to stupid to even attempt college. I may have stockholm syndrome or be institutionalized since I've been around so long, but if you make it that long, it could be an ok gig. Could be.

# ? Dec 19, 2013 23:24

Victor Vermis: Dec 21, 2004; WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

iyaayas01 posted:

if you are a lazy gently caress up now all you will be in the military is a lazy gently caress up who gets yelled at and who has some other lazy gently caress up control literally every aspect of their life.

Your mileage may vary on this one. One man's lazy rear end in a top hat is another organization-of-lazy-rear end in a top hat's outstanding and motivated individual. I dropped out of college multiple times over a span of six year and had zero credits and a bunch of permanent F's on my transcript to show for it.
In the Marine Corps, as a newly enlisted individual, your responsibilities are ridiculously simple and unless you're immune to criticism, you do not shirk those things- the notion will not even occur to you. The experience won't necessarily FIX you, but a little bit of conditioning- hard bought at an 8 year commitment- is bound to stick with you.

If you can muster up the nut to enlist, I'd say mustering up the nut to see a mental health professional is probably a better idea than making a big commitment to pay for something you're not even necessarily going to finish. I can't speak on the reserves from personal experience, but I seriously doubt one weekend a month is going to do anything for you besides become a constant temptation to skip drill and continue being a lazy rear end in a top hat. Boot camp alone will not fix anyone.

tl;dr Seek help for your brain. Then consider active duty enlistment. 4 Years. USMC infantry. You're welcome.

# ? Dec 19, 2013 23:56

Nostalgia4Butts: Jun 1, 2006; WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

Hekk posted:

gently caress Yeah!! Do it.

Also, don't buy the 100 percent in state tuition bullshit the National Guard will try to sell you. If you look closely at the fine print, the tuition assistance is offered until the pot of money set aside is gone. Take a guess how quickly that money disappears. Then guess how many Ohio National Guardsmen actually get all their tuition paid for.

Huh? In Connecticut it's a tuition waiver for Guardsmen. Go to school, just pay for the fees. I took 16 credits one semester, paid 120 bucks for the fees, and then had to buy my books.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 00:00

Hekk: Oct 12, 2012; 'smeper fi

PLANES CURE TOWERS posted:

Huh? In Connecticut it's a tuition waiver for Guardsmen. Go to school, just pay for the fees. I took 16 credits one semester, paid 120 bucks for the fees, and then had to buy my books.

From- http://www.ongsp.org/about_ongsp.html

Subject to funding available from the Ohio General Assembly the program provides 100 percent tuition to Army and Air Guard members attending a two- or four- year public college or university. An equivalent amount that is the average state university tuition charge can be applied toward the costs at a private, proprietary institution.

Admittedly, it's been some time since I ever had to worry about enlistment competition from the Guard. Unless it's changed in the last 6 or 7 years though, the funding set aside for tuition assistance pales in comparison to the number of applicants.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 00:30

Flying_Crab: Apr 12, 2002

Hekk posted:

gently caress Yeah!! Do it.

Also, don't buy the 100 percent in state tuition bullshit the National Guard will try to sell you. If you look closely at the fine print, the tuition assistance is offered until the pot of money set aside is gone. Take a guess how quickly that money disappears. Then guess how many Ohio National Guardsmen actually get all their tuition paid for.

If you enlist, it will take 6-8 years before your life isn't controlled by other retards who were to stupid to even attempt college. I may have stockholm syndrome or be institutionalized since I've been around so long, but if you make it that long, it could be an ok gig. Could be.

Depends on the state. Wisconsin is 100% reimbursement no matter what and it owns. Also you're still eligible for federal Army Tuition Assistance which is obviously based upon how much money is in the pot.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 00:40

RonaldResin: Mar 30, 2010

I'm currently planning to join the military, the Army specifically, so tell me if my head is in the right place.

I'm practically a community college drop out. Despite scoring 30+ on the ACT I nearly failed high school and simply can't make myself go to college. I've tried off and on for the past 3 years, and even after I lost my state scholarship and tried to pay my own way I still wound up floundering. I currently work for a family member as a clerk and that's clearly not my life's ambition. I do work hard, despite obviously not putting forth effort in college. So while I am lazy and a bit of a procrastinator it only shows with academics and I want to change that. I feel the military will be a step in that direction. It will also allow me to regain my lost financial opportunities with regards to college.

I've told family, and I do truly feel, that even if I had buckled down and gotten a PhD that as soon as I was finished I would join the Army. Part as a duty to my country, and part because I feel it is sort of a calling. My father was in the Army for several years, and I have so many "uncles" that were his army buddies that it left a pretty sizable impression on me. I lost my father at a young age and feel this is a means of connecting, as well as helping me to get answers for many of the questions he was never able to answer for me. And yes those "uncles" are soon to be talking with me and helping me plan this out with their many resources in my area.

I also want to use the opportunity to get away from my hometown. I've traveled a bit, but never lived anywhere else. I really hadn't even planned to get away when I picked colleges as there were enough around here, but as I grow older I feel the need to mature. Part of that process is removing myself from the help and people I have learned to rely on, and in effect getting out of this town. The ability to live somewhere else in the states sounds nice, let alone the possibility of actually leaving the country itself.

I wish to mature and grow up by putting myself through the Army but I do realize it is only going to help stick my face in the right direction. I understand no one is going to take me by the hand or look at me and tell me I'm all grown up now. I just view it as an opportunity to be handed tools that will help me on that path.

Also, I've yet to talk to a recruiter, I've been waiting to make sure I want to do this and to talk to my "uncles" and their resources. I trust them to leave all the spin at the door and give me hard truths. I've also yet to take the ASVAB, but I have a very solid grasp on what my range will be. A friend, almost identically in my situation down to his ACT scores recently joined the Navy after I talked to him about my desire to join the Army. He scored a 99 and through talks with recruiters at high school I was told I would be expected to be in the 95+ range. Where does that leave me, occupation wise in the Army? The same recruiter who told me what he believed my score would be, told me that if I dropped an ASVAB score of 95+ on a desk with a recruiter from every branch only the Navy and Air Force wouldn't get up and walk away. I could understand that do to Navy Nukes, and Airforce Maint/Logistics, but how much bullshit was he trying to sell me on?

Edit: I'm only interested in the occupation opportunities in the Army as a means of seeing the possibilities. Being just a grunt is a-okay but it would be nice to know what I could look forward to if I, for whatever reason, wish to make a career out of it. Career Army isn't really what I plan but I won't rule it out before I get my toes wet. Also, I am interested in the "three letter agencies" after service and have read the previous replies on that. So any advice that would help me further that goal during service would be appreciated, even if it is don't.

RonaldResin fucked around with this message at 17:14 on Dec 20, 2013

# ? Dec 20, 2013 17:05

Diarrhea Elemental: Apr 2, 2012; Am I correct in my assumption, you fish-faced enemy of the people?

RonaldResin posted:

Have you ever had that feeling where you're standing on the edge of somewhere very, very high and get the sudden urge to jump? You just wonder what those endless seconds would be like before you hit, fear and adrenaline but also some nihilistic kind of release?

Step the gently caress back, you idiot.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 17:20

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

RonaldResin posted:

I'm currently planning to join the military, the Army specifically, so tell me if my head is in the right place.

I'm practically a community college drop out. Despite scoring 30+ on the ACT I nearly failed high school and simply can't make myself go to college. I've tried off and on for the past 3 years, and even after I lost my state scholarship and tried to pay my own way I still wound up floundering. I currently work for a family member as a clerk and that's clearly not my life's ambition. I do work hard, despite obviously not putting forth effort in college. So while I am lazy and a bit of a procrastinator it only shows with academics and I want to change that. I feel the military will be a step in that direction. It will also allow me to regain my lost financial opportunities with regards to college.

I've told family, and I do truly feel, that even if I had buckled down and gotten a PhD that as soon as I was finished I would join the Army. Part as a duty to my country, and part because I feel it is sort of a calling. My father was in the Army for several years, and I have so many "uncles" that were his army buddies that it left a pretty sizable impression on me. I lost my father at a young age and feel this is a means of connecting, as well as helping me to get answers for many of the questions he was never able to answer for me. And yes those "uncles" are soon to be talking with me and helping me plan this out with their many resources in my area.

I also want to use the opportunity to get away from my hometown. I've traveled a bit, but never lived anywhere else. I really hadn't even planned to get away when I picked colleges as there were enough around here, but as I grow older I feel the need to mature. Part of that process is removing myself from the help and people I have learned to rely on, and in effect getting out of this town. The ability to live somewhere else in the states sounds nice, let alone the possibility of actually leaving the country itself.

I wish to mature and grow up by putting myself through the Army but I do realize it is only going to help stick my face in the right direction. I understand no one is going to take me by the hand or look at me and tell me I'm all grown up now. I just view it as an opportunity to be handed tools that will help me on that path.

Also, I've yet to talk to a recruiter, I've been waiting to make sure I want to do this and to talk to my "uncles" and their resources. I trust them to leave all the spin at the door and give me hard truths. I've also yet to take the ASVAB, but I have a very solid grasp on what my range will be. A friend, almost identically in my situation down to his ACT scores recently joined the Navy after I talked to him about my desire to join the Army. He scored a 99 and through talks with recruiters at high school I was told I would be expected to be in the 95+ range. Where does that leave me, occupation wise in the Army? The same recruiter who told me what he believed my score would be, told me that if I dropped an ASVAB score of 95+ on a desk with a recruiter from every branch only the Navy and Air Force wouldn't get up and walk away. I could understand that do to Navy Nukes, and Airforce Maint/Logistics, but how much bullshit was he trying to sell me on?

Edit: I'm only interested in the occupation opportunities in the Army as a means of seeing the possibilities. Being just a grunt is a-okay but it would be nice to know what I could look forward to if I, for whatever reason, wish to make a career out of it. Career Army isn't really what I plan but I won't rule it out before I get my toes wet. Also, I am interested in the "three letter agencies" after service and have read the previous replies on that. So any advice that would help me further that goal during service would be appreciated, even if it is don't.

Needs more backstory.

Marine Corps infantry is the answer to whatever you're asking. Don't be a fag.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 17:46

krispykremessuck: Jul 22, 2005; unlike most veterans and SA members $10 is not a meaningful expenditure for me

I'm gonna have me a swag Bar-B-Q

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

Marine Corps infantry is the answer to whatever you're asking. ~~Don't~~ be a fag.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 18:35

NIGGER DEATH TURBO: Jul 4, 2013; by Lowtax

as a fellow 30+ ACT score haver who dropped out of a state school that's basically on par with community college spending a few years in the infantry turned me around and now i'm doing great in school and am transferring to an ivy league A+ would recommend v :shobon:

# ? Dec 20, 2013 18:40

bloops: Dec 31, 2010; Thanks Ape Pussy!

RonaldResin posted:

I'm currently planning to join the military, the Army specifically, so tell me if my head is in the right place.

I'm practically a community college drop out. Despite scoring 30+ on the ACT I nearly failed high school and simply can't make myself go to college. I've tried off and on for the past 3 years, and even after I lost my state scholarship and tried to pay my own way I still wound up floundering. I currently work for a family member as a clerk and that's clearly not my life's ambition. I do work hard, despite obviously not putting forth effort in college. So while I am lazy and a bit of a procrastinator it only shows with academics and I want to change that. I feel the military will be a step in that direction. It will also allow me to regain my lost financial opportunities with regards to college.

I've told family, and I do truly feel, that even if I had buckled down and gotten a PhD that as soon as I was finished I would join the Army. Part as a duty to my country, and part because I feel it is sort of a calling. My father was in the Army for several years, and I have so many "uncles" that were his army buddies that it left a pretty sizable impression on me. I lost my father at a young age and feel this is a means of connecting, as well as helping me to get answers for many of the questions he was never able to answer for me. And yes those "uncles" are soon to be talking with me and helping me plan this out with their many resources in my area.

I also want to use the opportunity to get away from my hometown. I've traveled a bit, but never lived anywhere else. I really hadn't even planned to get away when I picked colleges as there were enough around here, but as I grow older I feel the need to mature. Part of that process is removing myself from the help and people I have learned to rely on, and in effect getting out of this town. The ability to live somewhere else in the states sounds nice, let alone the possibility of actually leaving the country itself.

I wish to mature and grow up by putting myself through the Army but I do realize it is only going to help stick my face in the right direction. I understand no one is going to take me by the hand or look at me and tell me I'm all grown up now. I just view it as an opportunity to be handed tools that will help me on that path.

Also, I've yet to talk to a recruiter, I've been waiting to make sure I want to do this and to talk to my "uncles" and their resources. I trust them to leave all the spin at the door and give me hard truths. I've also yet to take the ASVAB, but I have a very solid grasp on what my range will be. A friend, almost identically in my situation down to his ACT scores recently joined the Navy after I talked to him about my desire to join the Army. He scored a 99 and through talks with recruiters at high school I was told I would be expected to be in the 95+ range. Where does that leave me, occupation wise in the Army? The same recruiter who told me what he believed my score would be, told me that if I dropped an ASVAB score of 95+ on a desk with a recruiter from every branch only the Navy and Air Force wouldn't get up and walk away. I could understand that do to Navy Nukes, and Airforce Maint/Logistics, but how much bullshit was he trying to sell me on?

Edit: I'm only interested in the occupation opportunities in the Army as a means of seeing the possibilities. Being just a grunt is a-okay but it would be nice to know what I could look forward to if I, for whatever reason, wish to make a career out of it. Career Army isn't really what I plan but I won't rule it out before I get my toes wet. Also, I am interested in the "three letter agencies" after service and have read the previous replies on that. So any advice that would help me further that goal during service would be appreciated, even if it is don't.

Do you realize you're seriously talking about joining the Army? Go to college you loving dork.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 18:40

iyaayas01: Feb 19, 2010; Perry'd

holocaust bloopers posted:

Do you realize you're seriously talking about joining the Army? Go to college you loving dork.

I feel like people watch Stripes or something and seriously think that's what the Army is like.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 19:18

sforzacio: Nov 6, 2012

You know that Katy Perry video where her boyfriend cheats on her so she gets even by joining the Marines and is like, "This is the part of me that you can never, ever, ever, take away from me~"

There are many, many parts of you that the military can and will always, always take away from you.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 19:53

Stultus Maximus: Dec 21, 2009; USPOL May

sforzacio posted:

You know that Katy Perry video where her boyfriend cheats on her so she gets even by joining the Marines and is like, "This is the part of me that you can never, ever, ever, take away from me~"

There are many, many parts of you that the military can and will always, always take away from you.

Including joints and sense organs.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 20:00

Sir Lucius: Aug 3, 2003

If you really want to join the Army then you need to forget about everything you know as a person, and instead start thinking about being a slave. You will be doing a lot of stupid poo poo and if you want to survive you'll have to convince yourself you actually love doing it. You will have to love wandering around a base's fence-line in 20 degree temperatures looking for trash to pick up. You will have to love waking up a 3 am to run down the street in a formation wearing a bright yellow safety patrol belt. You will have to love getting written up for some stupid reason you can't even fathom. And at the end of the day you will have to love going home to a lovely barracks room with a lovely roommate listening to a lovely broken fire alarm that keeps going off for some reason.

But let's say you can handle this. One day you make rank and it's not as bad right? No, it's still bad, and now you have to manage people who were dumb enough to join the Army too. Let's say some guy likes to take a poo poo with the door open, but his roommate thinks this is harassment. You then get to deal with this problem. Maybe some guy doesn't shower, maybe he uses his underwear drawer as a fast food pantry. That's your problem now.

You want to join the NSA or CIA or whatever? Join the Airforce. You won't necessarily learn anything useful, but the quality of life is at least way better.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 20:55

bloops: Dec 31, 2010; Thanks Ape Pussy!

^^^^USAF isn't going to do a goddamn thing to get anyone in the NSA/CIA that any other branch could. Join the USAF to go be a flyer and/or enjoy a higher quality of life standard. Please note, you'll still be working with and FOR idiots.

Kids who want to drop out of school or not even attend: read the monthly service threads; reconsider life decision.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 21:23

shyduck: Oct 3, 2003

Join the Marines.

# ? Dec 20, 2013 21:29

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

RonaldResin posted:

I'm currently planning to join the military, the Army specifically, so tell me if my head is in the right place.

I'm practically a community college drop out. Despite scoring 30+ on the ACT I nearly failed high school and simply can't make myself go to college. I've tried off and on for the past 3 years, and even after I lost my state scholarship and tried to pay my own way I still wound up floundering. I currently work for a family member as a clerk and that's clearly not my life's ambition. I do work hard, despite obviously not putting forth effort in college. So while I am lazy and a bit of a procrastinator it only shows with academics and I want to change that. I feel the military will be a step in that direction. It will also allow me to regain my lost financial opportunities with regards to college.

I've told family, and I do truly feel, that even if I had buckled down and gotten a PhD that as soon as I was finished I would join the Army. Part as a duty to my country, and part because I feel it is sort of a calling. My father was in the Army for several years, and I have so many "uncles" that were his army buddies that it left a pretty sizable impression on me. I lost my father at a young age and feel this is a means of connecting, as well as helping me to get answers for many of the questions he was never able to answer for me. And yes those "uncles" are soon to be talking with me and helping me plan this out with their many resources in my area.

I also want to use the opportunity to get away from my hometown. I've traveled a bit, but never lived anywhere else. I really hadn't even planned to get away when I picked colleges as there were enough around here, but as I grow older I feel the need to mature. Part of that process is removing myself from the help and people I have learned to rely on, and in effect getting out of this town. The ability to live somewhere else in the states sounds nice, let alone the possibility of actually leaving the country itself.

I wish to mature and grow up by putting myself through the Army but I do realize it is only going to help stick my face in the right direction. I understand no one is going to take me by the hand or look at me and tell me I'm all grown up now. I just view it as an opportunity to be handed tools that will help me on that path.

Also, I've yet to talk to a recruiter, I've been waiting to make sure I want to do this and to talk to my "uncles" and their resources. I trust them to leave all the spin at the door and give me hard truths. I've also yet to take the ASVAB, but I have a very solid grasp on what my range will be. A friend, almost identically in my situation down to his ACT scores recently joined the Navy after I talked to him about my desire to join the Army. He scored a 99 and through talks with recruiters at high school I was told I would be expected to be in the 95+ range. Where does that leave me, occupation wise in the Army? The same recruiter who told me what he believed my score would be, told me that if I dropped an ASVAB score of 95+ on a desk with a recruiter from every branch only the Navy and Air Force wouldn't get up and walk away. I could understand that do to Navy Nukes, and Airforce Maint/Logistics, but how much bullshit was he trying to sell me on?

Edit: I'm only interested in the occupation opportunities in the Army as a means of seeing the possibilities. Being just a grunt is a-okay but it would be nice to know what I could look forward to if I, for whatever reason, wish to make a career out of it. Career Army isn't really what I plan but I won't rule it out before I get my toes wet. Also, I am interested in the "three letter agencies" after service and have read the previous replies on that. So any advice that would help me further that goal during service would be appreciated, even if it is don't.

I can already see what is happening. You will read all of the posts in response to your own but you won't listen to them. You will join the Army, get poo poo on as a PFC for something like 2 years, and then finally get promoted. You will ride out the rest of your time as a SPC, shaming your way through the remainder of your enlistment. One day, you will get out of the Army. You will look around and find yourself 5 years older, with no additional skill set, and even further behind all of your peers that have moved on and done something with their lives.

There is no more war for you to fight in, the odds of you deploying are very small. Just go back to college man. If you genuinely feel that you can't hack it, then join the Infantry...preferably with a clause to send you to RASP (ask you recruiter). At least you might...might get the discipline at Regiment to actually reach that potential that has always eluded you.

Good luck.

# ? Dec 21, 2013 02:19

FIDEL CASHFLOW: Oct 13, 2009

enlist as 18x

# ? Dec 21, 2013 04:19

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

FIDEL CASHFLOW posted:

enlist as 18x

While the x-ray program had it's place. It is time it ended. There are currently 12,000 Green Berets...12,000. That is nearly the size of the 82nd Airborne Division. So now you have a division worth of Green Berets that are all trying to fit in to 3 Battalions each (4th is slowly being consolidated at each Group).

Do NOT sign an 18x contract in the current Army. You will experience an attrition rate of something close to 80-90% for 18x candidates while in the SFQC because they don't need them.

You will waste time in the SFQC(if you even make it through SFAS). If you are at all serious about bettering yourself by enlisting, then go to RASP. You can always go to SFAS once you have an adequate amount of Team Leader/Squad Leader time. The 18 series are not going anywhere, but it is not a good time to be entering as an 18x. You are looking at a virtual guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

# ? Dec 21, 2013 05:19

Woof Blitzer: Dec 29, 2012; [-]

Cloudy McPouty posted:

While the x-ray program had it's place. It is time it ended. There are currently 12,000 Green Berets...12,000. That is nearly the size of the 82nd Airborne Division. So now you have a division worth of Green Berets that are all trying to fit in to 3 Battalions each (4th is slowly being consolidated at each Group).

Do NOT sign an 18x contract in the current Army. You will experience an attrition rate of something close to 80-90% for 18x candidates while in the SFQC because they don't need them.

You will waste time in the SFQC(if you even make it through SFAS). If you are at all serious about bettering yourself by enlisting, then go to RASP. You can always go to SFAS once you have an adequate amount of Team Leader/Squad Leader time. The 18 series are not going anywhere, but it is not a good time to be entering as an 18x. You are looking at a virtual guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

what

# ? Dec 21, 2013 05:48

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

Was my post that hard to understand?

# ? Dec 21, 2013 06:05

NIGGER DEATH TURBO: Jul 4, 2013; by Lowtax

probably more that you took an obvious jokeman post really seriously

# ? Dec 21, 2013 06:07

FIDEL CASHFLOW: Oct 13, 2009

Cloudy McPouty posted:

While the x-ray program had it's place. It is time it ended. There are currently 12,000 Green Berets...12,000. That is nearly the size of the 82nd Airborne Division. So now you have a division worth of Green Berets that are all trying to fit in to 3 Battalions each (4th is slowly being consolidated at each Group).

Do NOT sign an 18x contract in the current Army. You will experience an attrition rate of something close to 80-90% for 18x candidates while in the SFQC because they don't need them.

You will waste time in the SFQC(if you even make it through SFAS). If you are at all serious about bettering yourself by enlisting, then go to RASP. You can always go to SFAS once you have an adequate amount of Team Leader/Squad Leader time. The 18 series are not going anywhere, but it is not a good time to be entering as an 18x. You are looking at a virtual guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

dont listen to this dude, go 18x

# ? Dec 21, 2013 06:11

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

friend of the family DEATH TURBO posted:

probably more that you took an obvious jokeman post really seriously

Not so much my taking it seriously, as much as that dude taking 18x dreams to his recruiter. :ohdear:

Come young prospective enlistee, be sheltered in the bosom of Cloudy McPouty. I will save you from these evil goons that seek to lead you astray for hilarity.

Cloudy McPouty fucked around with this message at 06:32 on Dec 21, 2013

# ? Dec 21, 2013 06:27

sforzacio: Nov 6, 2012

FIDEL CASHFLOW posted:

dont listen to this dude, go 18x

listen to this guy. you gonna let some stupid STATISTICS tell you if you can be an operator or not?

# ? Dec 21, 2013 06:54

FIDEL CASHFLOW: Oct 13, 2009

sforzacio posted:

listen to this guy. you gonna let some stupid STATISTICS tell you if you can be an operator or not?

lesson #1 for joining the army, dont listen to reason

it will lead to disaster

go with what sounds cool

(srsly, if it makes sense it is wrong. if u have absolutely no idea what is going on then everything is okay)

# ? Dec 21, 2013 07:37

iceslice: May 20, 2005

4 years in with nearly 26 use-or-lose means I have plenty of free time to edit this post into awesomeness. I'm imagining my self in Los Angeles on The Price is Right playing the game "YES OR NO!"

Cloudy McPouty posted:

While the x-ray program had it's place. It is time it ended.

Nope

Cloudy McPouty posted:

There are currently 12,000 Green Berets...12,000. That is nearly the size of the 82nd Airborne Division. So now you have a division worth of Green Berets that are all trying to fit in to 3 Battalions each (4th is slowly being consolidated at each Group).

Wherever you pulled this statistic, I promise there are guys deploying with only a half-full team, or pulling guys from 19th/20th Group to fill out the teams. Lets go with NOPE!

Cloudy McPouty posted:

Do NOT sign an 18x contract in the current Army. You will experience an attrition rate of something close to 80-90% for 18x candidates while in the SFQC because they don't need them.

Yup.

Cloudy McPouty posted:

You will waste time in the SFQC(if you even make it through SFAS). If you are at all serious about bettering yourself by enlisting, then go to RASP.

Nope.

Cloudy McPouty posted:

You can always go to SFAS once you have an adequate amount of Team Leader/Squad Leader time. The 18 series are not going anywhere, but it is not a good time to be entering as an 18x.

Nope

Cloudy McPouty posted:

You are looking at a virtual guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

Yup.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 16:19

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

Your edit of my post is nonsensical.

You agree that attrition rates for 18x are approaching 80-90% in the SFQC yet say in a following statement that now is a good time to enlist under an 18x contract, even though you say that it is a guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

The number of green berets I mentioned is not some big secret. USASOC far over-reached in providing numbers to the groups during 2006-2009. As a result, you have 12,000 of them now trying to fit in to 3 BNs per group. Do not mistake a shortage of a specific MOS(probably 18D or 18F), for a shortage of Special Forces qualified NCOs and Officers army wide. Plenty of teams deploy "half-full", its called split ops.

Most puzzling to me though, is that you disagree with the suggestion that someone go to SFAS once they have an adequate amount of Team Leader and Squad Leader time. As a junior, you are expected to be able to lead a company size element of indigenous personnel. I am pretty loving sure that TL/SL time will come in handy then, especially when none of your dudes speak English anymore.

Do you have any idea you are talking about?

Cloudy McPouty fucked around with this message at 09:36 on Dec 23, 2013

# ? Dec 23, 2013 09:31

Vasudus: May 30, 2003

Cloudy McPouty posted:

Your edit of my post is nonsensical.

You agree that attrition rates for 18x are approaching 80-90% in the SFQC yet say in a following statement that now is a good time to enlist under an 18x contract, even though you say that it is a guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

The number of green berets I mentioned is not some big secret. USASOC far over-reached in providing numbers to the groups during 2006-2009. As a result, you have 12,000 of them now trying to fit in to 3 BNs per group. Do not mistake a shortage of a specific MOS(probably 18D or 18F), for a shortage of Special Forces qualified NCOs and Officers army wide. Plenty of teams deploy "half-full", its called split ops.

Most puzzling to me though, is that you disagree with the suggestion that someone go to SFAS once they have an adequate amount of Team Leader and Squad Leader time. As a junior, you are expected to be able to lead a company size element of indigenous personnel. I am pretty loving sure that TL/SL time will come in handy then, especially when none of your dudes speak English anymore.

Do you have any idea you are talking about?

He went 18x and is currently in group. I'm going to go with "yes".

# ? Dec 23, 2013 09:37

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

Vasudus posted:

He went 18x and is currently in group. I'm going to go with "yes".

Well in that case, listen to the man. I'm just a dude.

# ? Dec 23, 2013 09:42

iceslice: May 20, 2005

Cloudy McPouty posted:

Your edit of my post is nonsensical.

You agree that attrition rates for 18x are approaching 80-90% in the SFQC yet say in a following statement that now is a good time to enlist under an 18x contract, even though you say that it is a guaranteed ticket to the 82nd ABN DIV.

The number of green berets I mentioned is not some big secret. USASOC far over-reached in providing numbers to the groups during 2006-2009. As a result, you have 12,000 of them now trying to fit in to 3 BNs per group. Do not mistake a shortage of a specific MOS(probably 18D or 18F), for a shortage of Special Forces qualified NCOs and Officers army wide. Plenty of teams deploy "half-full", its called split ops.

Most puzzling to me though, is that you disagree with the suggestion that someone go to SFAS once they have an adequate amount of Team Leader and Squad Leader time. As a junior, you are expected to be able to lead a company size element of indigenous personnel. I am pretty loving sure that TL/SL time will come in handy then, especially when none of your dudes speak English anymore.

Do you have any idea you are talking about?

The edit was supposed to be nonsensical. This is the internet and I was mostly loving around. I'll rephrase it into something that makes more sense:

No one has asked this in a long time, but if someone really wants to go 18x, get up and try. Self selection is the greatest attrition. That being said the vast majority of people (RA or x-ray, it doesn't matter) are not going to make it. More importantly all Groups need good people. It doesn't matter that Afghanistan ending or there are any projected numbers of "percentage of strength," guys get out for all kinds of reasons. Some of them have been at war for the last decade and their family lives are ruined. Some of them are physically broken but have been sticking it out. Some of them are just going to be totally bored because their lives are no longer smashing down doors and blowing things up. With the end of an event comes a shift in focus. With that shift in focus comes an increase in attrition.

I had a bunch of poo poo typed out but I'm going to keep it simple: On a good team the guy who is the best at the task is the one who is in charge. It doesn't matter where you come from, if your team has confidence in your capability you're the one who does it. Experience in the RA is a critical foundation, but being able to think and learn fast is more important. You never know what will end up on your plate, and you have to be prepared to learn and do whatever it takes to make a successful mission. Its actually my favorite part of the job.

edit: Just to be clear you're 99% right on with your posts. My disagreement was in discouraging people to try, not in any facts you stated about SF in general.

Back to the regular programming:

sforzacio posted:

You know that Katy Perry video where her boyfriend cheats on her so she gets even by joining the Marines and is like, "This is the part of me that you can never, ever, ever, take away from me~"

There are many, many parts of you that the military can and will always, always take away from you.

I am a special snowflake, the Army can never take that away from me. I AM A CHAMPION AND YOU'RE GOING TO HEAR ME ROARRRRRRR~

iceslice fucked around with this message at 16:01 on Dec 23, 2013

# ? Dec 23, 2013 15:19

Cloudy McPouty: Jun 12, 2013

I was extraordinarily drunk and angry at my wife when I posted that last night. I need to take myself way less seriously. Here is a video of a Corgi twerking.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEzK9aIcBK0

# ? Dec 23, 2013 17:08

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# ? May 29, 2024 06:18

Oxford Comma: Jun 26, 2011; Oxford Comma: Hey guys I want a cool big dog to show off! I want it to be ~special~ like Thor but more couch potato-like because I got babbies in the house!
Everybody: GET A LAB.
Oxford Comma: OK! (gets a a pit/catahoula mix)

The loaded gun thing is in response to Ceros saying treat all guns as loaded, followed by another goon typing in ALL CAPS that was wrong and guns are always loaded.

Those of you who had "unloaded" guns pointed at you were around dipshits who didn't follow the other three gun safety rules.

# ? Dec 23, 2013 17:12

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