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Ehud posted:i'm dying I can not parse this sentence. Help me, y'all. " Dolphins fans must find a way to await negativity with the franchise's first playoff bid on the line Sunday against the Jets " Does he mean abate instead of await?
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Dec 27, 2013 00:32
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Dave Dameshek is a lovely writer. Highlights: quote:The first 16 weeks of the 2013 season have been pro football’s answer to ‘American Hustle’: long, confusing, and plum fantastic. quote:Long, as in… how long ago does it seem Peyton opened the season with those seven TD passes against the defending champs? And will that long ago game – played in Denver instead of Baltimore (where it should been played) – be what keeps the Ravens from defending their crown? The home team has won 10 of the last 11 of those primetime midweek season openers, so it’s fair to assume the Ravens would have won theirs… which would mean Sunday’s game in Cincy would be for the division title, not a fight for survival. quote:Lots of people already consider the Packers and Eagles making the playoffs a foregone conclusion, but this season has made making such assumptions an rear end of you… but not me. I’m assuming nothing. In fact, I have more questions than answers. Questions like: quote:And if Cutler wins it, he’ll likely get to keep calling Chicago home for a few more seasons so he and his sizable pals Brandon Marshall and Alshon Jeffrey can build on Marc Trestman’s promising first season. If the Bears lose, though, Cutler will more likely be wearing a Texans or Titans (or Bengals?) helmet come September ’14. quote:Who’ll represent the AFC in the Super Bowl? I am mad irl that this guy has a job writing and I do not
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Dec 28, 2013 17:17
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Keep in mind he got his start in radio, and his talking is even more terrible than his writing.
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Dec 28, 2013 17:27
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if i had to pick three words i would choose 'ooh' and 'la' and poo poo, uh, i dunno, 'la' again?
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Dec 28, 2013 17:29
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my dude underestimatin j-law smh
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Dec 28, 2013 17:31
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If your goddamn lede has a pop culture reference, that's where I stop reading. Good work, Dameshek.
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Dec 28, 2013 21:11
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I still can't believe Dameshek has a weekly show on NFL.com during the season. He's so annoying and terrible, how the gently caress did he manage that He has several shows. I mean one is him just making up poo poo "What if this happened instead?" called the N"if"L. Some poor intern draws all the pictures for that too.
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Dec 28, 2013 21:27
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I'd only ever seen/heard Dameshek and had never read his writing. I wish I could still say that.
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Dec 28, 2013 21:45
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I like the shame report sometimes but dave should be a feature rather then the presenter.
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Dec 28, 2013 21:53
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Febreeze posted:I still can't believe Dameshek has a weekly show on NFL.com during the season. He's so annoying and terrible, how the gently caress did he manage that I would watch it but only if every question took the form "What if [player name] was [race other than the one the player is]?
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Dec 28, 2013 23:22
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swickles posted:I would watch it but only if every question took the form "What if [player name] was [race other than the one the player is]? What if Sebastian Janikowski was Japanese? he wouldn't have a drinking problem.
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Dec 28, 2013 23:39
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what if tim tebow was jewish but acted exactly the same way, but about judaism
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Dec 28, 2013 23:41
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FeedingHam2Cats posted:what if tim tebow was jewish but acted exactly the same way, but about judaism Run out on a loving rail day 1.
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Dec 29, 2013 02:08
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Tatum Girlparts posted:Run out on a loving rail day 1. Half the owners are Jewish. I'd like to hope this wouldn't actually happen. In all honesty, and not to derail, I don't think there COULD be a Jewish version of Tebow. There's not just a form of evangelicalism in the religion. Jews are not interested in sharing their message on a wide platform like Tebow did in his own way. They'll do it with fellow Jews of a less religious lifestyle all day (as has been my experience) but when it comes to other religions, REALLY religious Jews don't really have an outside the religion agenda. EDIT: Really all sects of Judaism. Even when I went on Birthright, the whole (inferential) point was to make more Jewish weddings, get you to have more Jewish Babies and move to Israel to have them, where in 18 years they'll be conscripted. Absolut Mike fucked around with this message at 02:24 on Dec 29, 2013 |
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Dec 29, 2013 02:20
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What if Tim Tebow was Musli..hahahHahahahaha I can't even finish
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Dec 29, 2013 02:47
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Absolut Mike posted:Half the owners are Jewish. I'd like to hope this wouldn't actually happen. I'm sure they aren't like going 'hey Goldberg you a fuckin Jew???' but going by my experiences there is nothing evangelicals lose their poo poo about more than Jews who remind them that Jews are different than them. If he came out one day and said 'hey guys, let me tell you about my Jewish faith and why it's helped me' he'd get a wonderful combo hit of the typical 'FUCKIN JEWS EVERYWHERE AAAAGH' nutjob crowd and evangelicals clutching their pearls that a dude who doesn't think Jesus is god is telling people he thinks his faith is correct. Tebow's press entirely came from the right wing evangelical crowd hugging him and vowing to protect him from the liberal comunazis who dare to say 'you look like an rear end in a top hat when you kneel down like that mid game'. If he didn't have those dudes he'd just be another good college player who was decent in the NFL. I mean you're totally right that Jews just don't do the poo poo he did and we're super not evangelical at all, but I'm assuming he's some kinda weird rear end 'gotta spread the faith' type for this so it's a more accurate comparison. Yea in real life if Tim was a Jew he'd just, ya know be a Jew and no one would give a gently caress because seriously except for crazy people who cares if a dude is a Jew we super don't get in your face about it.
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Dec 29, 2013 02:47
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Tatum Girlparts posted:I'm sure they aren't like going 'hey Goldberg you a fuckin Jew???' but going by my experiences there is nothing evangelicals lose their poo poo about more than Jews who remind them that Jews are different than them. If he came out one day and said 'hey guys, let me tell you about my Jewish faith and why it's helped me' he'd get a wonderful combo hit of the typical 'FUCKIN JEWS EVERYWHERE AAAAGH' nutjob crowd and evangelicals clutching their pearls that a dude who doesn't think Jesus is god is telling people he thinks his faith is correct. Tebow's press entirely came from the right wing evangelical crowd hugging him and vowing to protect him from the liberal comunazis who dare to say 'you look like an rear end in a top hat when you kneel down like that mid game'. If he didn't have those dudes he'd just be another good college player who was decent in the NFL. Judaism has an out for non-Jews to get into heaven, no way they're as h4rdcore People would definitely say things like "oy" when he threw picks tho
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Dec 29, 2013 05:02
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Declan MacManus posted:Judaism has an out for non-Jews to get into heaven, no way they're as h4rdcore Imagine Jon gruden trying to say 'oy gevalt'
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Dec 29, 2013 15:19
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Sports Person of the Year: The N-word. Great contribution to the sport, Jemele Hill!
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Jan 3, 2014 19:07
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Literally everything wrong with Penn State's current culture in a succinct article http://www.blackshoediaries.com/2014/1/1/5263776/bill-obrien-didnt-get-it
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Jan 3, 2014 22:29
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haljordan posted:Sports Person of the Year: The N-word. You know you really have to respect Jemelle Hill. She consistently finds way to set the bar lower. It's like a pathological need to see if she can top her last piece.
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Jan 4, 2014 02:01
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What is Boomer and Carton and why do they never seem to talk about sports?
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Jan 6, 2014 14:33
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I didn't think in the year of our lord 2014 there would still be MICHAEL VICK IS A DOG MURDERER editorials, but there you have it. http://www.nytimes.com/2014/01/06/sports/football/before-signing-a-strong-arm-teams-should-heed-vicks-dark-past.html Best yet is a namedrop of the widely de-bunked, non-existent Bountygate scandal.
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Jan 7, 2014 00:59
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OneThousandMonkeys posted:I didn't think in the year of our lord 2014 there would still be MICHAEL VICK IS A DOG MURDERER editorials, but there you have it. Uh...Bountygate wasn't real? 
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Jan 7, 2014 01:11
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Goddamn that Vick article has everything, including the insinuation that playing in "the Canadian league" would serve as appropriate penitence. 
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Jan 7, 2014 01:12
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Ehud posted:Uh...Bountygate wasn't real? Yeah I was wondering about this one too
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Jan 7, 2014 01:13
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See on one hand I wouldn't mind a experienced QB who doesn't suck to back up Geno. On the other hand, gently caress Michael Vick for slaughtering lots of awesome dogs. I'm conflicted.
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Jan 7, 2014 01:14
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Mel Mudkiper posted:Yeah I was wondering about this one too Well I guess the scandal existed, that much is true, but it's a vaporscandal that went ahead thanks to Goodell being terrible. Wikipedia: quote:However on July 26, 2012, Vilma and seven witnesses from the Saints testified in front of a federal judge in New Orleans that Goodell got his facts wrong, and there was no bounty scheme. [8] At least one legal expert agreed that Goodell had overstepped his authority. [9] Also want to go on the record that Vick personally torturing and executing dogs is indeed horrible, but duh.
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Jan 7, 2014 01:42
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If only the judge had sentenced Vick to 2-3 years in the CFL all would be forgiven.
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Jan 7, 2014 01:51
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OneThousandMonkeys posted:Well I guess the scandal existed, that much is true, but it's a vaporscandal that went ahead thanks to Goodell being terrible. So what you quoted says that the scheme existed, but that it wasn't the players fault? Isn't Gregg Williams even on tape talking about deliberately trying to aggravate opposing players injuries or something?
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Jan 7, 2014 04:20
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Hey guys, torturing dogs is bad. Intentionally harming another human permanently while playing a game is ok though.
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Jan 7, 2014 04:27
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swickles posted:Hey guys, torturing dogs is bad. Intentionally harming another human permanently while playing a game is ok though. Dr. Doom over here, y'all.
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Jan 7, 2014 04:33
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Vilma and seven of his cronies/other accused testified that it didn't happen in the context of a lawsuit to get their punishments lifted (let's forget the shitload of people who testified that bountygate did happen despite the risk of getting blackballed), and one judge (in the process of refusing to grant Vilma a restraining order against the entire NFL, lollllll) made an offhanded remark outside their competence. Sounds like an open and shut case, the Saints were pure angels who got railroaded!Gerty posted:So what you quoted says that the scheme existed, but that it wasn't the players fault? Isn't Gregg Williams even on tape talking about deliberately trying to aggravate opposing players injuries or something? Yes. He was recorded telling players to aggravate their opponents concussions and to tear their ACLs. Gregg Williams, while unaware he was being recorded posted:"We need to find out in the first two series of the game, that little wide receiver, No. 10 [Kyle Williams], about his concussion. We need to f***ing put a lick on him right now. He needs to decide. He needs to f***ing decide."
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Jan 7, 2014 04:36
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Otto Skorzeny posted:Vilma and seven of his cronies/other accused testified that it didn't happen in the context of a lawsuit to get their punishments lifted (let's forget the shitload of people who testified that bountygate did happen despite the risk of getting blackballed), and one judge (in the process of refusing to grant Vilma a restraining order against the entire NFL, lollllll) made an offhanded remark outside their competence. Sounds like an open and shut case, the Saints were pure angels who got railroaded! Yup! I was very wrong about the Bountygate thing. Like, diametrically and utterly opposed from the correct stance.
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Jan 7, 2014 04:41
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OneThousandMonkeys posted:Yup! I was very wrong about the Bountygate thing. Like, diametrically and utterly opposed from the correct stance. It is worth saying that it was undoubtedly quite common, if not everywhere, then with everyone from the Buddy Ryan school of loving people up (specifically, Jeff Fisher), but the Saints got the target on their back and the league had top dollars on the table for their kneecaps.
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Jan 7, 2014 04:47
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Jesus, do "reporters" have ANY shame whatsoever anymore? I don't know who Sally Jenkins is, but I'd like to meet the Washington Post editor she hosed in order to get a column. Great hit piece on RGIII, whom she calls a "boy emperor." Then there's this gem, which she buries down near the bottom third of the article:quote:In fairness to Griffin, not every story about his ego is true, and he is so young that he genuinely may not understand how he was perceived, especially in the flash of stardom. Yeah not every story is true but let me go ahead and reference them all unquestioningly. Also apparently RGIII is the #1 roadblock for a coach wanting to go to Washington. edit: Apparently this woman was one of Lance Armstrong's biggest defenders and supporters too (she collaborated on a book with him)  Obviously a fantastic judge of character.
haljordan fucked around with this message at 16:30 on Jan 7, 2014 |
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Jan 7, 2014 15:46
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At least she didn't call him a thug
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Jan 7, 2014 15:49
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haljordan posted:Jesus, do "reporters" have ANY shame whatsoever anymore? I don't know who Sally Jenkins is, but I'd like to meet the Washington Post editor she hosed in order to get a column. Great hit piece on RGIII, whom she calls a "boy emperor". Then there's this gem, which she buries down near the bottom third of the article: Does Shanahan really think he looks better by leaking this? I mean, don't owners consider "planting hit pieces in the press" to be a more grievous sin than "kinda sucking at your job"?
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Jan 7, 2014 16:00
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To me, the most ridiculous part is how she tries to portray RGIII as the #1 problem with the Redskins and not the fuckwit owner.
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Jan 7, 2014 16:05
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haljordan posted:edit: Apparently this woman was one of Lance Armstrong's biggest defender and supporter too (she collaborated on a book with him) She also did the JoePa interview where he never heard of rape and a man.
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Jan 7, 2014 16:27
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