RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

tehloki posted:

I love how the oatmeal's website looks like the bad version of the site in the comic

http://chainsawsuit.com/comic/2011/06/10/the-chainsawsuit/

# ? Jan 15, 2014 00:10

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# ? May 15, 2024 04:26

user on probation: Nov 1, 2012; removed

anthonypants posted:

http://chainsawsuit.com/comic/2011/06/10/the-chainsawsuit/

Yep. I show this to everyone who unironically gushes an oatmeal comic at me.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 00:46

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

A ticket went out to a vendor...

:frogsiren:

The system is hosed, I might have hosed it myself, nothing is starting up and there are null pointer exceptions everywhere and I don't even know why it's hosed oh god please help.

5 minutes later

:madmax:

Ticket has been escalated to critical, support will be online with you in 10 minutes.

5 hours later - back up and running with no noticed outage to users (because they'd all gone home) and it's not clear if it was anything I did at all. Given how good their guys were I honestly felt ashamed to be the idiot user saying "well I think I added a new source at the third level but I don't remember".

I need to go pour myself a drink and write myself up for ruining my own evening or something.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 01:31

nitrogen: May 21, 2004; Oh, what's a 217°C difference between friends?

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

A ticket went out to a vendor...

The system is hosed, I might have hosed it myself, nothing is starting up and there are null pointer exceptions everywhere and I don't even know why it's hosed oh god please help.

5 minutes later

Ticket has been escalated to critical, support will be online with you in 10 minutes.

5 hours later - back up and running with no noticed outage to users (because they'd all gone home) and it's not clear if it was anything I did at all. Given how good their guys were I honestly felt ashamed to be the idiot user saying "well I think I added a new source at the third level but I don't remember".

I need to go pour myself a drink and write myself up for ruining my own evening or something.

We've all been there. The real pros own up to what they did, and work to fix it.

Users just go, "I don't know how the laptop screen shattered! I just found it that way!"

# ? Jan 15, 2014 01:40

dennyk: Jan 2, 2005; Cheese-Buyer's Remorse

A c E posted:

I too can't type properly. I've tried a few times to retrain myself but it's a hard habit to shake. I don't ever use the CAPS key though, I will hold shift if I need something all in caps because caps lock is the devil. I usually disable the key entirely because I hit it accidentally while gaming all the time.

I only use my index fingers and thumbs while typing. Occasionally I throw in a random other finger to assist. Despite this I can still type at 80wpm and don't need to look at the keyboard at all while typing (except if I am stuck with one of those ergo keyboard with the split, those gently caress me up). I get comments about it all the time.

Heh, this is me, except I only use my middle fingers. :v:

Never could learn to touch-type the right way, for some reason. I can't go quite as fast as some folks, but it's plenty fast for the work I do, so I don't care.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 01:41

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

nitrogen posted:

We've all been there. The real pros own up to what they did, and work to fix it.

Users just go, "I don't know how the laptop screen shattered! I just found it that way!"

I am going to tell myself that this is my periodic reminder to pay attention to what I'm doing because if I fuckup then I can't smugface other teams anymore when they do it.

I think the last one was (a few years back) accidentally wiping a table on a prod DB with an incorrectly formatted select statement, fortunately it was log data only and I restored it before anyone noticed :ninja:

dennyk posted:

Heh, this is me, except I only use my middle fingers. Never could learn to touch-type the right way, for some reason. I can't go quite as fast as some folks, but it's plenty fast for the work I do, so I don't care.

I continuously transpose letters as my left hand moves faster than my right or something. I must spend 50% of my day correcting my own typos and often look like a drooling idiot when typing in chat windows.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 01:45

SEKCobra: Feb 28, 2011; Hi
Don't look at my site

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

I continuously transpose letters as my left hand moves faster than my right or something. I must spend 50% of my day correcting my own typos and often look like a drooling idiot when typing in chat windows.

Same here. I can type mighty fast, over 500 wpm if I really want to, but without extreme concentration and some prior excercise my letters start stumbling over each other.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 02:20

hihifellow: Jun 17, 2005; seriously where the fuck did this genre come from

Ticket came in earlier, user can't access the VPN, getting a non-resolve error for the port. Pointed DNS to 8.8.8.8 and did an nslookup to our concentrator;

code:

*** google-public-dns-a.google.com can't find VPN.WORKPLACE.ORG: Non-existent domain

While we're not sure what happened yet, signs are pointing to Network Solutions dropping the glue record for our name servers out of the .org delegation. It sounds like there are others our ISP services that had the same thing happen to them as well.

To contribute to WPM chat, I think I can get to about 120 wpm but my accuracy goes to hell past 80. After watching some of our users type (hell, some of my co-workers even) I'm pretty satisfied with my speed.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 02:30

Prosthetic_Mind: Mar 1, 2007; Pillbug

My fingers are too big to fit on the home row of any sane keyboard, I ended up doing hunt and peck long enough that I can use all my fingers and not look down.

Occasionally my hands get out of sync and if I'm typing while not paying attention I'll type up sentances with letters out of place, or one or both of my hands will get off from where I think they are and I'll write gibberish comprised of all letters to the left or right of the keys I meant to press.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 02:33

porktree: Mar 23, 2002; You just fucked with the wrong Mexican.

SEKCobra posted:

Same here. I can type mighty fast, over 500 wpm if I really want to, but without extreme concentration and some prior excercise my letters start stumbling over each other.

Ya, 500-600 wpm is my upper limit too. :smug:

# ? Jan 15, 2014 03:55

SEKCobra: Feb 28, 2011; Hi
Don't look at my site

porktree posted:

Ya, 500-600 wpm is my upper limit too.

I like the fact tht that one website where you can take a quick read and write test, I apparently read at 1200 wpm which was at least twice as high as the next guy when everyone was posting their score on another forum.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 04:05

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

wpm talk, I do 100+wpm easily, after about 120-140 my right hand starts typing faster than my left.

Too many hours/days/years (literally over a year logged into EQ) of playing MMOs/FPSs has increased type speed/accuracy

# ? Jan 15, 2014 04:36

ZetsurinPower: Dec 14, 2003; I looooove leftovers!

tehloki posted:

I love how the oatmeal's website looks like the bad version of the site in the comic

I think that site is called the oatmeal because its bland and old people think its great

# ? Jan 15, 2014 04:46

mllaneza: Apr 28, 2007; Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952

Attention everyone getting hassled about ticket closure times.

If you work for my mother's dialup provider you can leave a ticket open for a week. If you work for my cable company you can have a ticket open for two weeks without someone telling you to do something with it.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 06:32

nexxai: Jul 17, 2002; quack quack bjork; Fun Shoe

mllaneza posted:

Attention everyone getting hassled about ticket closure times.

If you work for my mother's dialup provider you can leave a ticket open for a week. If you work for my cable company you can have a ticket open for two weeks without someone telling you to do something with it.

And if you work in a particular bank in Bermuda, you can leave your broken printer tickets open for over a year.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 06:54

Bohemian Cowabunga: Mar 24, 2008

"We" (as in the COs) want to use Skydrive Pro to get rid of Dropbox for filesharing with the rather simplistic solution of just creating accounts using their work email accounts.
Now this idea is not completely terrible when comparing with what they are doing now by just using private Dropbox accounts.

However, because Skydrive sends out it share links via some random @outlook.com address but is using the email address the account was created with as the from address, our mail server rejects the incomming mail with "SPF unauthorized mail is prohibited".

I must admit that my understanding of SPF records could be better, but is there a fix to this without loosening our spam protection or by doing something silly as allowing the outlook.com servers send mail on behalf of our domain?

Bohemian Cowabunga fucked around with this message at 11:28 on Jan 15, 2014

# ? Jan 15, 2014 11:12

SEKCobra: Feb 28, 2011; Hi
Don't look at my site

Bohemian Cowabunga posted:

"We" (as in the COs) want to use Skydrive Pro to get rid of Dropbox for filesharing with the rather simplistic solution of just creating accounts using their work email accounts.
Now this idea is not completely terrible when comparing with what they are doing now by just using private Dropbox accounts.

However, because Skydrive sends out it share links via some random @outlook.com address but is using the email address the account was created with as the from address, our mail server rejects the incomming mail with "SPF unauthorized mail is prohibited".

I must admit that my understanding of SPF records could be better, but is there a fix to this without loosening our spam protection or by doing something silly as allowing the outlook.com servers send mail on behalf of our domain?

You could configure (good) servers to ignore it, I wouldn't authorize another party to send official email for you tho.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 12:03

Bohemian Cowabunga: Mar 24, 2008

SEKCobra posted:

I wouldn't authorize another party to send official email for you tho.

Yeah this is not happening. I have to dig deeper and see if I can come up with a solution, I was hoping there was a way to just stop Skydrive sending messages on behalf of other email addresses (which frankly seems rather problematic in itself).

# ? Jan 15, 2014 14:44

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA: May 29, 2008

nitrogen posted:

We've all been there. The real pros own up to what they did, and work to fix it.

Everyone runs an unqualified UPDATE query on a production database exactly once.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:06

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Bohemian Cowabunga posted:

"We" (as in the COs) want to use Skydrive Pro to get rid of Dropbox for filesharing with the rather simplistic solution of just creating accounts using their work email accounts.
Now this idea is not completely terrible when comparing with what they are doing now by just using private Dropbox accounts.

However, because Skydrive sends out it share links via some random @outlook.com address but is using the email address the account was created with as the from address, our mail server rejects the incomming mail with "SPF unauthorized mail is prohibited".

I must admit that my understanding of SPF records could be better, but is there a fix to this without loosening our spam protection or by doing something silly as allowing the outlook.com servers send mail on behalf of our domain?

Why aren't you just upgrading to Dropbox for Business?

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:20

slightpirate: Dec 26, 2006; i am the dance commander

Does anyone have safe links for all of the previous Java versions out there? They've updated it so quickly and we have some users who have updated beyond what our time keeping software uses (and it doesn't work of course). I've been tasked with rolling anyone who is on 7 Update 51 back to 7 update 21 and I don't see any obvious "Click here for previous versions of Java" link on their site.

I remember them having a repository for all of that, but I'll be damned if I can find it now.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:35

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Inspector_666 posted:

Why aren't you just upgrading to Dropbox for Business?

Isn't Dropbox for Business about a million times more expensive than SkyDrive Pro / Box.net?

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:37

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

slightpirate posted:

Does anyone have safe links for all of the previous Java versions out there? They've updated it so quickly and we have some users who have updated beyond what our time keeping software uses (and it doesn't work of course). I've been tasked with rolling anyone who is on 7 Update 51 back to 7 update 21 and I don't see any obvious "Click here for previous versions of Java" link on their site.

I remember them having a repository for all of that, but I'll be damned if I can find it now.

http://www.oracle.com/technetwork/java/javase/downloads/java-archive-downloads-javase7-521261.html

and more specifically http://www.oracle.com/technetwork/java/javase/downloads/java-archive-downloads-javase7-521261.html#jre-7u21-oth-JPR

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:40

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Caged posted:

Isn't Dropbox for Business about a million times more expensive than SkyDrive Pro / Box.net?

I actually have no idea, I just figure it would be simpler.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:43

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

We didn't use Dropbox for Business specifically because you couldn't control write access to shared folders for specific users. Maybe they added that in now, but a year ago it wasn't a feature.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:50

slightpirate: Dec 26, 2006; i am the dance commander

Caged posted:

http://www.oracle.com/technetwork/java/javase/downloads/java-archive-downloads-javase7-521261.html

and more specifically http://www.oracle.com/technetwork/java/javase/downloads/java-archive-downloads-javase7-521261.html#jre-7u21-oth-JPR

Thanks!

# ? Jan 15, 2014 15:59

KoRMaK: Jul 31, 2012

Was it in here that someone posted a regex explainer? I found this one ( http://regex101.com/ ), but I forget which page contained the discussion.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 16:22

the littlest prince: Sep 23, 2006

KoRMaK posted:

Was it in here that someone posted a regex explainer? I found this one ( http://regex101.com/ ), but I forget which page contained the discussion.

Probably the Cavern of Cobol general thread.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 16:29

Bohemian Cowabunga: Mar 24, 2008

Inspector_666 posted:

Why aren't you just upgrading to Dropbox for Business?

Its a money issue and we already gave some Skydrive licenses from another agreement.

GreenNight posted:

We didn't use Dropbox for Business specifically because you couldn't control write access to shared folders for specific users. Maybe they added that in now, but a year ago it wasn't a feature.

and this is part of the other reason. Skydrive is actually really easy to manage.

Bohemian Cowabunga fucked around with this message at 17:37 on Jan 15, 2014

# ? Jan 15, 2014 17:34

Caconym: Feb 12, 2013

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA posted:

Everyone runs an unqualified UPDATE query on a production database exactly once.

I didn't.

I ran an upgrade script in production instead of test. :v:

# ? Jan 15, 2014 20:01

Sundayturks: May 31, 2011; You were expecting...Sandy Claws?; Fun Shoe

'd from working at a Wine Merchant (hey, at least I know where to go crawling back to for liquid brain-death when it all gets too much) to working basic tech support for a very well-equipped local Uni. i5s and SSDs as far as the eye can see, and my new boss has issued all-out war against our (few) remaining XP machines.
Pay is okay for what it is, and there's full-time positions going in the summer (almost got one there about a year ago, on the back of a fresh selection of A+/Network+/MCTs), the folks i'm working with seem chill as hell and nothing here is half-assed, which is I suppose the main perk of working in large academia.

Still settling in, most of the tickets seem to be pretty innocuous but my co-workers tell me that won't last.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 20:31

Alliterate Addict: Jul 10, 2012; dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA posted:

Everyone runs an unqualified UPDATE query on a production database exactly once.

Thankfully, my once was on staging instead of production, and the functionality was so little-used that it only affected about 30 test accounts. But those 30 test accounts to this day all have the same paypal email set on them.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 20:33

blackswordca: Apr 25, 2010; Just 'cause you pour syrup on something doesn't make it pancakes!

In my time looking for new work, I have come across some terrible job postings, but this one I have to share.

http://www.jobbank.gc.ca/detail-eng.aspx?OrderNum=7276612&Source=JobPosting&RchJobType=Reg_jobs&CmmGrp=GAB005&Categ=2*&OpPage=50&PgNum=

# ? Jan 15, 2014 21:55

Loose Ifer: Feb 1, 2002; It's Swelling!; Grimey Drawer

blackswordca posted:

In my time looking for new work, I have come across some terrible job postings, but this one I have to share.

http://www.jobbank.gc.ca/detail-eng.aspx?OrderNum=7276612&Source=JobPosting&RchJobType=Reg_jobs&CmmGrp=GAB005&Categ=2*&OpPage=50&PgNum=

Talk about competitive salary and benefits.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 21:56

Posting Principle: Dec 10, 2011; by Ralp

blackswordca posted:

In my time looking for new work, I have come across some terrible job postings, but this one I have to share.

http://www.jobbank.gc.ca/detail-eng.aspx?OrderNum=7276612&Source=JobPosting&RchJobType=Reg_jobs&CmmGrp=GAB005&Categ=2*&OpPage=50&PgNum=

You can get paid more stocking shelves in Edmonton.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 22:00

Sickening: Jul 16, 2007; Black summer was the best summer.

blackswordca posted:

In my time looking for new work, I have come across some terrible job postings, but this one I have to share.

http://www.jobbank.gc.ca/detail-eng.aspx?OrderNum=7276612&Source=JobPosting&RchJobType=Reg_jobs&CmmGrp=GAB005&Categ=2*&OpPage=50&PgNum=

I might have just goatse'd their fax machine using faxzero.com just now. I think they deserve it.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 22:04

JohnnyCanuck: May 28, 2004; Strong And/Or Free

You have your PMP and 5 years experience! Great! Let me pay you 28K a year! :downs:

# ? Jan 15, 2014 22:23

Endings: Jan 17, 2012; Close your eyes...

A ticket came in: Email is slow.

Welp, time to go manage some expectations! So I go up to see the user and examine it. You know, that actually is really slow, taking upwards of two minutes to download the single test message I sent her. How odd. I tell the user I'll look into it, and head back to my desk to see what mailserver she's on.

...Well, I don't recognize that site code. Ask around, no one else seems to. Search the company intranet site...

Is that a boat? Yes, in fact, the site code refers to a mailserver sitting in the middle of an ocean, hooked up by satellite link. Good thing she's new and her mailstore isn't real big yet! Send the ticket off to the exchange team to migrate her (have fun with that, guys).

I think this is the only legitimate 'email is slow' ticket I've ever seen.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 22:26

HalloKitty: Sep 30, 2005; Adjust the bass and let the Alpine blast

What in the hell? There's a mail server on a boat that a user (presumably not on a boat) was created on?

That's one of the oddest support issues.

# ? Jan 15, 2014 22:48

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# ? May 15, 2024 04:26

Wheezle: Aug 13, 2007; 420 stop boats erryday

Endings posted:

A ticket came in: Email is slow.

Welp, time to go manage some expectations! So I go up to see the user and examine it. You know, that actually is really slow, taking upwards of two minutes to download the single test message I sent her. How odd. I tell the user I'll look into it, and head back to my desk to see what mailserver she's on.

...Well, I don't recognize that site code. Ask around, no one else seems to. Search the company intranet site...

Is that a boat? Yes, in fact, the site code refers to a mailserver sitting in the middle of an ocean, hooked up by satellite link. Good thing she's new and her mailstore isn't real big yet! Send the ticket off to the exchange team to migrate her (have fun with that, guys).

I think this is the only legitimate 'email is slow' ticket I've ever seen.

Well there's your problem. The mail is being delivered by sea!

# ? Jan 15, 2014 22:54

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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