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jota23 posted:I'm 36 weeks as of today, and I'm already measuring 1.5cm dilated and 70% effaced! Obviously I need this baby to cook for at least another week, but knowing these contractions are actually doing something is helping my mental state tremendously. So jealous. 36+3 and nothing. Still high and closed 
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Jan 21, 2014 05:32
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apathetic JAP posted:So jealous. 36+3 and nothing. Still high and closed Why even have them check dilation at that point? Seems like it would only be discouraging. You are still most likely a whole MONTH away from giving birth, sorry bro.
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Jan 21, 2014 10:23
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I'm a nerd about the stats. I realize it isn't indicative of when I'll go into labor. I just like to know! One friend went from nothing at 36+4 to a newborn at 37+5. Another family member went another 2 weeks after finding out she was 100% effaced and 4cm dilated. You never really know!
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Jan 21, 2014 15:00
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I never had them check at all until I was obviously in labor. I asked the doc if it told them anything useful, he said not really, so I opted out of having hands up in me more often then necessary.  Edit: I did have a lot of people I work with ask me how dilated I was a lot toward the end of my pregnancy. This surprised me because I'd never imagined asking anyone about the state of the cervix before. I told them I had no idea and they all looked sad I didn't know. Weird. sheri fucked around with this message at 16:23 on Jan 21, 2014 |
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Jan 21, 2014 16:20
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I always felt it kind of awkward when people would ask me how dilated I was at the end. Especially since it never happened (thus, a c section) but I felt it was kind of personal. Talking about it on the internet is totally cool though Can you personally actually feel a difference or is it just something you don't realize?
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Jan 21, 2014 16:26
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Next time around I'm going to opt out of routine cervical checks too. I was 1-2 cm/75% effaced at 36 weeks, hung out there for THREE WEEKS until I jumped to 4 cm at my 39 week appointment and went into labor 4 days later. And yeah having supermarket checkers and other strangers ask you about the state of your cervix is very awkward. It didn't feel any different to be dilating, it doesn't predict anything about if you'll go into labor soon, it just means you get fisted several times at your OBs office and the last couple weeks of waiting are made even more difficult by people saying "you're going to go into labor any minute!" Or "I bet you'll never go into labor at this rate."
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Jan 21, 2014 16:35
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rectal cushion posted:Why even have them check dilation at that point? Seems like it would only be discouraging. You are still most likely a whole MONTH away from giving birth, sorry bro. I had my first at 37+1. So that's probably why.
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Jan 21, 2014 18:00
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apathetic JAP posted:I had my first at 37+1. So that's probably why. But what does that even tell you? Some women have no dilation going on at an appointment and go into labor the next day. Some women walk around at 3-4 cm for weeks before going into labor. I think her point was that how dilated and effaced you are it or aren't is not a reliable indicator of when or how soon labor will start
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Jan 21, 2014 19:38
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sheri posted:But what does that even tell you? Some women have no dilation going on at an appointment and go into labor the next day. Some women walk around at 3-4 cm for weeks before going into labor. I think her point was that how dilated and effaced you are it or aren't is not a reliable indicator of when or how soon labor will start Yeah, I understand that. I've been to the rodeo before. I just gave my opinion about why she probably checked me, since the question was something along the lines of "why would she do that when you're likely to be pregnant another month." My doctor seems to think due to my previous "early-term" delivery I'll be going early-term again and wants a feel for my cervical situation. As for my complaint in the first place, it's really not that big of a deal. I'm just miserable and was hoping some progress had been made (whether or not it's a reliable indicator of when labor will begin). It's not like I'm sitting here chugging castor oil, I was just a bit disappointed. Sorry.
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Jan 21, 2014 23:27
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My midwife checked at 36/37 weeks when she did the Group B Strep test last time around since she was all up there anyway and I expect the same this time. She said to think of anything that had happened as freebies for labor and that's about it (although dilation/effacement is a reliable indicator of how successful an induction will be, so that's a positive way to look at it too).
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Jan 21, 2014 23:31
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skeetied posted:She said to think of anything that had happened as freebies for labor and that's about it (although dilation/effacement is a reliable indicator of how successful an induction will be, so that's a positive way to look at it too). That may be the real reason then. I'm scheduled for induction at 39 weeks.
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Jan 22, 2014 00:48
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Aha, I wondered. I only had a couple of cervical checks, 36,39,40, 40+5.
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Jan 22, 2014 18:09
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Holy poo poo we're having twins. Didn't see that coming! Holy poo poo. I'm super pumped. Just very surprised. Hufflepuff or bust! fucked around with this message at 01:59 on Jan 24, 2014 |
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Jan 24, 2014 01:56
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Holy poo poo, I have a one month old now. And his latching is so improved from two weeks ago. Thank god. Congrats on twins!
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Jan 24, 2014 11:18
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Hey everyone - it's time to jump in to this thread I guess since I have a little boy due in around 7 weeks time. I've read most of this thread and the parenting one and they've been pretty awesome for decent level headed advice from smart people, which in between all the barely literate bullshit elsewhere on the internet is a real relief. My question to you guys is how do you all deal with difficult grandparents, so far I've managed to tell my Mum that we don't want people coming to visit until the baby has had his first round of vaccinations at 8 weeks (they're all having to fly over since we live in another country, it's not like they live 10 minutes down the road or anything) and she seemed to be ok with that, but I don't know if I'll get that excuse to work on the rest of them  . Basically I'm not close to any of them, including my own, and my partners Mum has some pretty full on personality disorder type stuff going on so I just want us to have some time to adjust to being a family of 3 and get the whole nursing thing sorted and a bit of practice under our belt before my house gets full of  . Is wanting to wait 6 - 8 weeks being unreasonable, because I'm not a very social person so really the ideal time (for me) for people to visit would be never, but, you know.oh, and congrats kaishek on the twins - holy poo poo indeed.
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Jan 27, 2014 07:13
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Ambystoma posted:My question to you guys is how do you all deal with difficult grandparents, so far I've managed to tell my Mum that we don't want people coming to visit until the baby has had his first round of vaccinations at 8 weeks (they're all having to fly over since we live in another country, it's not like they live 10 minutes down the road or anything) and she seemed to be ok with that, but I don't know if I'll get that excuse to work on the rest of them The problem with the vaccination thing is that it sounds like A. an excuse or B. I can easily see a difficult family interpreting that as you accusing them of being a bunch of germ-infested typhoid Marys. But there's nothing unreasonable about the truth - wanting time to establish yourself as a family and getting the hang of things before you start having people in your house for more than brief visits. I'm very close to my mum, who lives in another part of the country, and I still told her exactly that - I wanted my husband and I to have some time to get used to being a family of three before having visitors over for an extended period of time, so they flew in to visit after three weeks. Besides, newborns are really boring and spend their time basically sleeping or nursing or crying, so having family from another country visiting for the first time after two months, when the baby will be more than a needy meatloaf, sounds like a great idea! If they insist on coming sooner, look into booking a hotel room or an apartment. When my parents visited, they stayed at a hotel nearby. Even though I'm close to them and love having them around, I didn't want people living in our house during the period of extended evening fussiness. They came in the morning, hung out with us during the day, took the baby for walks so my husband and I could rest for a bit, then went away in the evening. It was perfect! In summary, you're not unreasonable at all, and you shouldn't have to make up excuses for wanting to adjust to life as a family of three before having family invade your house. Also, newborns are no fun visiting.
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Jan 27, 2014 11:35
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I think honesty is the best policy there. It is totally fair to want some time to yourself and then say that you'll open up for family viewing hours. They're going to be coming from a perspective of wanting sincerely to get involved and offer helpful advice, so being understanding but firm about your timeline is best. My wife and I had planned a possible "babymoon" to get some vacation time before double-barreled baby onslaught, but now my understanding is that twins automatically count as high-risk and we shouldn't be contemplating travel outside of the US any time after 20 weeks. So much for a friend's wedding in Spain and chillin' in Malta....then again if I can get Mrs. to stop throwing up at least once a day that will count as a win so maybe I'm thinking too grand... Also our budget is, I guess, getting tossed out the window. TWO OF EVERYTHING. I'm still trying to sell Mrs. on an ingenious carabiner-based baby holster system so I can clip one baby to my belt while I change the other.
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Jan 27, 2014 20:16
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Cheers guys, I'm glad to know that I don't sound like a big meanie for wanting a little space.
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Jan 28, 2014 00:50
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Ambystoma posted:Cheers guys, I'm glad to know that I don't sound like a big meanie for wanting a little space. Of course you aren't a meanie, and gently caress any pushy relative who tries to guilt trip you into thinking otherwise. If I could go back in time and change anything about my time at home immediately post partum, it would have been to have enforced a no visitors rule for at least the first fortnight. I ended up quite battered about by labour and birth, and was having trouble with moving around on my own. Having my unhelpful, rude mother dropping around to play pass the baby the minute I got home from the hospital was not a fun time for me.
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Jan 28, 2014 07:58
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kaishek posted:My wife and I had planned a possible "babymoon" to get some vacation time before double-barreled baby onslaught, but now my understanding is that twins automatically count as high-risk and we shouldn't be contemplating travel outside of the US any time after 20 weeks. So much for a friend's wedding in Spain and chillin' in Malta....then again if I can get Mrs. to stop throwing up at least once a day that will count as a win so maybe I'm thinking too grand... I found out my wife is having twins the same way yours did: a nice sudden shock at the first ultrasound. Congrats by the way! But yeah, twins are at much higher risk for everything, and can have all kinds of disorders that affect only multiples. I hope you weren't hoping for a home birth or to use a birthing center; you're going to want a good medical team behind you, and you'll want a hospital with a good NICU. You should expect more doctor visits, ultrasounds (including higher-resolution level 2 ultrasounds), and non-stress tests than you would experience in a regular pregnancy. As an example, my wife is at 32 weeks, and has had more than 10 ultrasounds by now, and weekly doctor visits since late November. This way they can catch problems and hopefully fix them before they turn into big issues. The good news is that, while the risks are larger than a singleton pregnancy, they are still relatively small. My advice is resist the temptation to do Google searches, otherwise you and your wife will become nervous wrecks. Your doctor should explain the risks in due time. For now, just deal with the problems as they come. Most likely your kids will turn out okay, even if there are some rough seas along the way. As for your trip, it's good advice to stay home. My wife took a business trip from Chicago to a convention in Las Vegas at just before 20 weeks, and it was pretty difficult. She planned in a ton of downtime and reduced her workload to the bare minimum, and she was still exhausted by 7 PM every day. To top things off, pregnancy-friendly food was hard to come by as well, so she was frequently hungry as well. Going out of the country, especially across an ocean, is not a good idea for your wife at that time. My advice to you right now is see if you have any Mothers of Multiples groups in your area. They're a great source of advice, and it's a place where you can talk about having and raising twins without having 50,000 people come out of the woodwork and squeal in glee/tell you you're doomed/give you advice that doesn't apply. They also have HUGE sales for used baby stuff every fall and spring. My wife and I spent probably $200 at the fall sales, and saved at least $1500. They're a great way to save your money (gotta afford two children in daycare somehow!) and conserve your shower gifts for the stuff you can't buy used. Pendragon fucked around with this message at 16:51 on Jan 29, 2014 |
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Jan 29, 2014 16:47
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That is great advice, and I really appreciate it! Wife was shocked reading that while breastfeeding two the recommended calorie intake for mom is 4,000 calories! Fortunately if there's one thing I have experience in it is eating a lot. 
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Jan 30, 2014 16:38
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kaishek posted:That is great advice, and I really appreciate it! Wife was shocked reading that while breastfeeding two the recommended calorie intake for mom is 4,000 calories! Fortunately if there's one thing I have experience in it is eating a lot. I didn't know that, and I think I'll hold off on telling my wife that. She has enough trouble trying to eat enough calories with a stomach made smaller by two babies.
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Jan 30, 2014 19:55
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Pendragon posted:I didn't know that, and I think I'll hold off on telling my wife that. She has enough trouble trying to eat enough calories with a stomach made smaller by two babies. This is for breastfeeding,not pregnancy. Although 4,000 seems a bit high since the increase in calories for feeding a single baby is 300-500 calories per day.
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Jan 30, 2014 20:48
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sheri posted:This is for breastfeeding,not pregnancy. Although 4,000 seems a bit high since the increase in calories for feeding a single baby is 300-500 calories per day. You're right about it being high: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2672857/ The article posted:Current recommendations for energy supplementation during breast feeding are 2100–2500 kJ (500–600 kcal) per baby per day. That's about 3000-3200 calories total. A woman nursing twins uses 1200-1500 calories per day on breastfeeding, but some of it comes from the weight gained during pregnancy.
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Jan 30, 2014 22:07
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BrosephofArimathea posted:e) Not a question, but holy hell I am terrified at suddenly becoming a responsible adult. Just wanted to say thankyou to everyone for all the advice. After going 8 days overdue, labor starting in the middle of Gravity at IMAX and an emergency c-section, we now have a gorgeous little boy, Fox.  It was a little rough at first - she couldn't even pick him up, so I pretty much had to do everything from day zero - but all those cliches people throw out about it being life-changing and all that are pretty accurate. If anyone wants hospital/obs recommendations for Sydney, PM. Ours were absolutely amazing and I can't imagine entrusting my wife and little ones to anyone else. BrosephofArimathea fucked around with this message at 02:52 on Jan 31, 2014 |
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Jan 31, 2014 02:45
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kaishek posted:My wife and I had planned a possible "babymoon" to get some vacation time before double-barreled baby onslaught, but now my understanding is that twins automatically count as high-risk and we shouldn't be contemplating travel outside of the US any time after 20 weeks. So much for a friend's wedding in Spain and chillin' in Malta....then again if I can get Mrs. to stop throwing up at least once a day that will count as a win so maybe I'm thinking too grand... Ambystoma posted:Cheers guys, I'm glad to know that I don't sound like a big meanie for wanting a little space. I really limited visitors for the first few weeks with my second - this included family. My dad came to the hospital the day my son was born and the day after, and I had some very good friends drop by for coffee, but other than that, I tried not to entertain visitors. I also set the times and told them when to leave. There's nothing worse than feeling pressured to entertain when you've just removed a cat sized person from your body.
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Jan 31, 2014 07:00
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BrosephofArimathea posted:labor starting in the middle of Gravity at IMAX This is so awesome. I hope you stayed for the rest of the movie.
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Feb 1, 2014 16:51
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Anyone deal with acid reflux and/or allergy? My 6 week old is having a lot of the symptoms, fussy around feeding, bubbles in his mouth all the time, spits up a LOT, sticks his tongue out and makes a yuck face. The biggest thing is that within a short while of being laid flat on his back he often starts coughing and sputtering, followed by crying it's effecting everyone's sleep, as you can imagine. Plus, I think it is really uncomfortable for him. I've tried some of the recommended stuff like holding him upright after eating. I also took him to the doctor who gave me a Zantac prescription, which I filled yesterday. Anyone go through this? Did Zantac or something else help? The doctor also said I might try a test of eliminating dairy from my diet, but that he suspected reflux was more likely. A little background, he is exclusively breastfed and is gaining height and weight very well, about 75th percentile for both.
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Feb 2, 2014 00:23
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APOLLO OHNO-UDIDNT posted:Anyone deal with acid reflux and/or allergy? My 6 week old is having a lot of the symptoms, fussy around feeding, bubbles in his mouth all the time, spits up a LOT, sticks his tongue out and makes a yuck face. The biggest thing is that within a short while of being laid flat on his back he often starts coughing and sputtering, followed by crying My cousin's three month old has reflux and the zantac is working for them. She still throws up more than an average baby, but they say she is more comfortable overall.
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Feb 2, 2014 00:32
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Zantac saved my baby's life, and began helping tremendously immediately. If it's acid reflux, you'll know within a day or two.
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Feb 2, 2014 03:38
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Re: visitors post partum: We came home on a Friday night, and told everyone we didn't want visitors at all on the Saturday. On Sunday, EVERYONE came, which was pretty crazy, but then they all sort of had their fill and just trickled in over the next few weeks. I was all hopped up on hormones for the first couple of weeks and didn't mind having visitors - since I am breastfeeding, it was really easy to say "OK baby needs to feed now!" and take him back/away from everyone, and if he was asleep they all tiptoed around and let him sleep. Now that he is 9 weeks old I am way less inclined to have visitors. My boyfriend's mum in particular has become much more comfortable with our baby, to the point where she will pick him up while he's trying to sleep and wake him, or not hand him over when he is giving early hungry signs. She also keeps insisting he has "a pain in his tummy" and giving me this look like I am failing somehow by not magically making him fart the drat fart out.... maybe it's me with the problem here! Regardless I was fine with people to start with, now I wish they would be more considerate. ETA: I am working on finding a way to get the message across so it actually penetrates. Saying "He's trying to sleep now, so I want to leave him in his bouncer. If he doesn't sleep during the day he has a really ratty night" wasn't clear enough?
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Feb 2, 2014 04:35
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annaconda posted:Re: visitors post partum: We came home on a Friday night, and told everyone we didn't want visitors at all on the Saturday. On Sunday, EVERYONE came, which was pretty crazy, but then they all sort of had their fill and just trickled in over the next few weeks. "If you pick up my baby one more goddamn time while he is sleeping so help me I will drown you in the river." Too much? I am having hormones so it's hard to tell.
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Feb 2, 2014 07:50
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annaconda posted:.... maybe it's me with the problem here! I don't mean to come across harshly, but I guess I've got a short fuse for this kind of thing from dealing with it from my own mum. You've hit the nail on the head here, because you allow your boyfriend's mother to behave that way, she'll keep doing it. You've already tried asking her nicely to respect your parenting decisions and she's ignoring you, so it's time to put your foot down. I'm sure that you feel that your baby's comfort is more important than your boyfriend's mother's feelings, so you might need to tell her that her behaviour is unacceptable. bee fucked around with this message at 09:27 on Feb 2, 2014 |
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Feb 2, 2014 09:23
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cailleask posted:"If you pick up my baby one more goddamn time while he is sleeping so help me I will drown you in the river." Not too much, I got very close to it last time she was here. Bee, you're absolutely right. I have a problem confronting people in my life but I need to sack up for the sake of my son, who can't do it for himself. Not only that, I need to demonstrate to him how to stand up for himself so he doesn't end up a giant passive-aggressive sook like I am. If it happens again, I won't be gently suggesting that maybe the baby is tired, it will be a lot more firm.
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Feb 4, 2014 02:34
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I spent a long portion of my life being really anxious about asserting myself and avoiding confrontation, and it never seemed to do me any good. One trick that helped me to overcome it though, is not to see your situation as a confrontation, but as an opportunity. You've got the chance here to develop your own skills in asserting yourself, which will get better and easier to utilise the more you practice them. You've also got the chance to set an example for your son and show him that you're an advocate for his well being and that any disrespectful behaviour towards him doesn't get rewarded and will be dealt with appropriately. You got this, I'm sure of it.
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Feb 4, 2014 04:07
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I'm 38 weeks as of yesterday. Half the people in our lives are asking what is wrong with me that she is so late, and the other half keep saying they aren't ready for her to come because it's not convenient for them. I'm so glad that my baby, inside my body, must conform to their definition of convenience. I'm already having a hard time breathing, walking sleeping. I'm plagued with concerns over the fact that I work 90 minutes from home and the hospital, and my boss keeps flip-flopping over whether he wants me to telecommute or be in the office. The midwife says I'm ready to go any minute, but I'm pretty sure this baby is telling me not to hold my breath. In short, I'm disheartened. I'm giving up. The wind has died and these sails are empty. I want to curl up in bed under a pile of blankets forever. Wake me up when this show starts. Otherwise, leave me alone.
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Feb 5, 2014 04:38
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I feel you. After 36 weeks, everyday I had people telling me that I was going to pop any day/should be in the hospital. I was ready to kill. Baby will come when babby wants to come. I kept telling them to stop wishing away my free time because I was perfectly happy.
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Feb 5, 2014 08:15
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What on earth? Do these people not realise that full term is 37 - 41 weeks? 38 isn't even close to late. Next time someone hassles you jota, throw this study at them and tell them to give you a wheat pack/foot massage in silence or get out.
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Feb 5, 2014 08:46
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I absolutely love when people give their 2 cents! A girl at work told me "you know you're going to have no sleep or free time for years right? Hope you're ready to change poop diapers and be terrified every waking moment" Not a single person has said how amazing or happy babies make them.
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Feb 5, 2014 14:16
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http://powerofmoms.com/2012/05/joy-or-just-wait/ Read this! Yeah not sleeping sucks (in my 8th month of it!) and this article is so great for new moms or moms to be.
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Feb 5, 2014 14:22
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