Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

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Previa_fun: Nov 10, 2004

drat those Mazdas both look great.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 02:53

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# ? May 26, 2024 19:45

blk: Dec 19, 2009; .

So any hopes of a Legacy wagon again?

# ? Feb 5, 2014 02:57

OXBALLS DOT COM: Sep 11, 2005; by FactsAreUseless; Young Orc

MrYenko posted:

New-Gen Jeep Cherokee chat:

WHAT IN THE EVERLIVING gently caress DID THEY DO TO THE CHEROKEE?!?

Hey, you wanted quirky and unique, you got it.

Rumor has it it's based off of an unproduced Alfa design to save money on engineering the tooling because they're incredibly shaky financially right now (this was actually reported as fact and not rumor by the WSJ). Obviously they deny this strenuously, but its so hideous (literally worse than the Compass) that I feel like that makes more sense than the alternative.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 03:02

Rhyno: Mar 22, 2003; Can't post for 10 years!

Cream_Filling posted:

Hey, you wanted quirky and unique, you got it.

Rumor has it it's based off of an unproduced Alfa design to save money on engineering the tooling because they're incredibly shaky financially right now (this was actually reported as fact and not rumor by the WSJ). Obviously they deny this strenuously, but its so hideous (literally worse than the Compass) that I feel like that makes more sense than the alternative.

They can't admit it because then it's not MADE IN MURRICA and they'll look like fools.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 03:14

PeterWeller: Apr 21, 2003; I told you that story so I could tell you this one.

Cage posted:

Your earlier post doesnt match up with what youre saying now, though.

I'm sorry I didn't add "by modern standards" or "all things considered" or some other reasonably qualifying statement to my post about another silly grill swap poo poo post. Who is nitpicking here again?

# ? Feb 5, 2014 03:17

DEUCE SLUICE: Feb 6, 2004; I dreamt I was an old dog, stuck in a honeypot. It was horrifying.

Previa_fun posted:

drat those Mazdas both look great.

If they don't make a Mazdaspeed3 out of this generation they are morons. It's gorgeous.

Cream_Filling posted:

Character? Neither is particularly characterful beyond the hood scoop. They also have similarly shaped lights, similar grilles, and nearly the same character line and fender treatment (despite the difference in scale between the two). The only thing that really makes the Levorg unique is that it's a wagon and that it has a squared-off rear end end related to the Impreza hatch, which doesn't translate much to sedans since most sedans have squared rears.

The reason the Levorg is unusual is becuase it's a relatively squared off traditionally styled wagon in a time when wagons are rare and most of the surviving wagons have weird proportions to make them look less like wagons.

I suppose you're right. The rear flare isn't on the Legacy and I like the more aggressive front dam on the Levorg but that part is easy for them to fix down the line.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 03:53

MrYenko: Jun 18, 2012; #2 isn't ALWAYS bad...

Cream_Filling posted:

Hey, you wanted quirky and unique, you got it.

Rumor has it it's based off of an unproduced Alfa design to save money on engineering the tooling because they're incredibly shaky financially right now (this was actually reported as fact and not rumor by the WSJ). Obviously they deny this strenuously, but its so hideous (literally worse than the Compass) that I feel like that makes more sense than the alternative.

It's a godamned abomination. The fact that it's possibly an Alfa makes it even more hilariously terrible.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 04:01

OXBALLS DOT COM: Sep 11, 2005; by FactsAreUseless; Young Orc

MrYenko posted:

It's a godamned abomination. The fact that it's possibly an Alfa makes it even more hilariously terrible.

Yes I saw a few on the road today. One looked likr a normal model and one I think was the Trailhawk with black decals on teh hood and extra body cladding. Both were pretty much as ugly in person as you'd expect from the photos.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 04:03

Xguard86: Nov 22, 2004; "You don't understand his pain. Everywhere he goes he sees women working, wearing pants, speaking in gatherings, voting. Surely they will burn in the white hot flames of Hell"

I've seen the new Cherokee and it looks like something Kia would have built five to ten years ago. Not just weird but very cheap.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 04:42

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

MrYenko posted:

It's a godamned abomination. The fact that it's possibly an Alfa makes it even more hilariously terrible.

I saw one oncoming tonight in the dark, the running lights above the round headlights look like angry eyebrows.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 08:50

D C: Jun 20, 2004; 1-800-HOTLINEBLING
1-800-HOTLINEBLING
1-800-HOTLINEBLING

The new Cherokees have actually grown on me a bit, if I was in that market I'd give it a pretty heavy look.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 08:57

Throatwarbler: Nov 17, 2008; by vyelkin

Subaru could probably break 200,000 sales annually at some point if all their owners didn't :emo:

themselves each time a new generation comes out. Just kidding, what they actually need is a half-ton truck.

The new Alfa Romeo Miata with the new Mazda design language can't come quickly enough.

Speaking of cars that people actually buy, the Ram Diesel has been rated for 28mpg highway.

quote:

-2014 Ram 1500, powered by all-new 3.0-liter EcoDiesel V-6, records best-ever 28 mpg
in highway-cycle testing; 23-mpg combined city/highway rating also a new benchmark
--EPA�s best half-ton pickup rating since 3.6-liter Pentastar V-6 propelled 2013 Ram to
25 mpg; also exceeds top-ranked small pickup
--EcoDiesel- and Pentastar-powered Rams rank 1-2 for fuel economy in 2014, aided by
class-exclusive TorqueFlite 8-speed automatic transmission
--Best-in-class 4x4 fuel-economy (city, highway and combined) with 19/27/22 mpg
--Ram first to market and remains lone brand to offer small-displacement turbo-diesel engine in half-ton pickup; ordering opens Feb. 7
--All-new 3.0-liter EcoDiesel � which is 50-state compliant with Tier2-Bin 5/LEVII emissions regulations � delivers peak torque unsurpassed among V-6 pickups (420 lb.-ft.)

February 4, 2014 , Auburn Hills, Mich. - The EcoDiesel-powered 2014 Ram 1500 has earned a 28-mpg rating from the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), the best highway-cycle test result ever achieved by a full-size, half-ton pickup.

It also exceeds the EPA highway rating for the top-ranked small pickup.

The breakthrough results mean Ram keeps the half-ton fuel-economy record set last year by the 2013 Ram 1500. Equipped with a 3.6-liter Pentastar V-6 gasoline engine, the truck earned 25 mpg highway, a rating that stands for model-year 2014.

The Ram 1500 now owns the half-ton pickup segment�s top two spots in the EPA�s 2014 highway fuel-economy rankings.

�The new Ram 1500 EcoDiesel is truly in a class of it�s own with 28 MPG and the ability to tow 9200 pounds,� says Reid Bigland, President and CEO Ram Truck Brand. �To put the Ram 1500 EcoDiesel in context, it gets 6 mpg better fuel economy than the best F150 Eco-Boost. Overall, the Ram 1500 Eco-Diesel has outstanding pick-up truck capability with compact-car-like fuel economy.�

The EcoDiesel is the first and only advanced-technology turbo-diesel offering in the half-ton pickup segment. In addition to superior fuel economy, it delivers peak torque of 420 lb.-ft. (569 Nm), which is unsurpassed among full-size trucks equipped with V-6 engines.
The all-new engine�s block and bedplate are made from lightweight Compacted Graphite Iron (CGI). Its performance is enhanced by the innovative MultiJet 2 common-rail fuel-injection system, which is exclusive in North America to Chrysler Group.

MultiJet 2�s high-dispersion nozzles and advanced-technology servovalve can accommodate up to eight fuel-injection events per cylinder cycle. This mitigates noise and improves low-speed throttle response, while also reducing fuel consumption and emissions.

The all-new 3.0-liter EcoDiesel features state-of-the-art Selective Catalytic Reduction (SCR), high-pressure cooled Exhaust Gas Recirculation (EGR), variable swirl intake ports and a variable-geometry turbocharger. All contribute to 50-state compliance with Tier 2-Bin 5/LEV II emissions regulations.

Named one of Ward�s 10 Best Engines for 2014, the EcoDiesel V-6 was a significant factor in the Ram 1500�s selection as 2014 Motor Trend Truck of the Year. The Ram 1500 is the first vehicle to win this prestigious award in back to back years.

Chrysler Group�s segment-exclusive TorqueFlite 8-speed automatic transmission further improves the Ram 1500�s fuel efficiency. While enabling optimal engine speed in a wide range of driving conditions, the advanced-technology gearbox benefits from a thermal-management system that quickly warms transmission oil to reduce pumping losses associated with cold, low-viscosity fluid.

The 2014 Ram 1500�s efficiencies are not restricted to powertrain technologies. Other key features include:

--Active grille shutters that optimize air flow for improved aerodynamics
--Electric Power Steering (EPS), which relieves the engine from constantly turning a hydraulic pump
--Thoughtful material-use strategies that leverage lightweight aluminum for components � such as hoods � that do not compromise capability

Pricing for the 2014 Ram 1500 starts at $24,200, plus $1,195 destination. The exclusive V-6 EcoDiesel with TorqueFlite eight-speed automatic transmission is priced $2,850 greater than a similarly equipped Ram 1500 with a 5.7-liter HEMI� V-8 with TorqueFlite 8-speed transmission.
Ordering for EcoDiesel models begins Feb. 7.

The 2014 Ram 1500 is backed with an unsurpassed five-year /100,000-mile Powertrain Limited Warranty. The powertrain-limited warranty, which is transferrable, covers the cost of all parts and labor needed to repair a covered powertrain component � engine, transmission and drive system.

The standard three-year / 36,000-mile Basic Limited Warranty provides bumper-to-bumper coverage for the Ram 1500, from the body to the electrical system.

The 2014 Ram 1500 is built at the Warren Truck Assembly Plant (Warren, Mich.), which has assembled more than 12.5 million trucks since it started operations in 1938. Regular Cab models of the 2014 Ram 1500 are built at the Saltillo Truck Assembly Plant in Saltillo, Mexico.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 12:17

Franco Caution: Jul 18, 2003; Wicked. Tricksy. False.

Throatwarbler posted:

Pricing for the 2014 Ram 1500 starts at $24,200, plus $1,195 destination. The exclusive V-6 EcoDiesel with TorqueFlite eight-speed automatic transmission is priced $2,850 greater than a similarly equipped Ram 1500 with a 5.7-liter HEMI� V-8 with TorqueFlite 8-speed transmission.
Ordering for EcoDiesel models begins Feb. 7.

That engine seems pretty neat. When I looked into the packages before it seemed like you had to go pretty expensive to get it into a truck though.
I wonder how many people gloss over that quote and think the ecodiesel is only $2850 more than the base 1500 $24200?
Im guessing the upcoming commercials will say "2014 motortrend truck of the year. Also the first truck to achieve 28mpg! Starting at $24200!*"

*As shown, really expensive

Still cool though. Between this and the new ecoboost F150 maybe someday Ill end up with a truck again.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 17:01

jfreder: Feb 27, 2008

Franco Caution posted:

That engine seems pretty neat. When I looked into the packages before it seemed like you had to go pretty expensive to get it into a truck though.
I wonder how many people gloss over that quote and think the ecodiesel is only $2850 more than the base 1500 $24200?
Im guessing the upcoming commercials will say "2014 motortrend truck of the year. Also the first truck to achieve 28mpg! Starting at $24200!*"

*As shown, really expensive

Still cool though. Between this and the new ecoboost F150 maybe someday Ill end up with a truck again.

I think the most confusing part is the starting price of $24.2k is for the regular cab, mid length bed but you can only get the EcoDiesel on the long wheelbase models. That means you have to at least start with the regular cab, long bed or quad cab, mid bed before it becomes an option.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 17:35

Qwijib0: Apr 10, 2007; Who needs on-field skills when you can dance like this?; Fun Shoe

blk posted:

So any hopes of a Legacy wagon again?

Safety standards harmonisation between the EU and US was supposed to make it easier to offer models in both regions without expensive changes. Don't know what the status of that is, and unless it happens I doubt it. Americans hate wagons so we get the Outback. Being able to sell the EU Legacy wagon here would probably mean they'd offer it.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 18:04

Snowdens Secret: Dec 29, 2008; Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.

jfreder posted:

I think the most confusing part is the starting price of $24.2k is for the regular cab, mid length bed but you can only get the EcoDiesel on the long wheelbase models. That means you have to at least start with the regular cab, long bed or quad cab, mid bed before it becomes an option.

I wonder if this is for transmission/driveshaft packaging reasons or just to keep the diesel in the higher cost options.

# ? Feb 5, 2014 21:52

Powershift: Nov 23, 2009

Snowdens Secret posted:

I wonder if this is for transmission/driveshaft packaging reasons or just to keep the diesel in the higher cost options.

You couldn't get the ecoboost in the reg cab/short box f-150 until the 2014 tremor came out, so i doubt it's packaging, it's probably "gently caress you, pay me"

# ? Feb 5, 2014 23:08

PBCrunch: Jun 17, 2002; Lawrence Phillips Always #1 to Me

Once the diesel option is no longer the hot new thing in the ad copy the manufacturer will probably unbuckle it from the expensive option packages.

The release of the diesel Chevy Colorado will probably also play a role in less restrictive availability of the diesel engine in the Ram.

# ? Feb 6, 2014 15:48

dreesemonkey: May 14, 2008; Pillbug

Throatwarbler posted:

The new Alfa Romeo Miata with the new Mazda design language can't come quickly enough.

Pretty sure I read in the thread somewhere that Mazda isn't applying it's current design language to the ND for whatever reason, which is really unfortunate if you ask me

# ? Feb 6, 2014 18:03

Xguard86: Nov 22, 2004; "You don't understand his pain. Everywhere he goes he sees women working, wearing pants, speaking in gatherings, voting. Surely they will burn in the white hot flames of Hell"

Powershift posted:

You couldn't get the ecoboost in the reg cab/short box f-150 until the 2014 tremor came out, so i doubt it's packaging, it's probably "gently caress you, pay me"

Tremor would be fully cool if it just had a darn manual option, preferably straight up from the floor with a ruby eyed skull.

# ? Feb 6, 2014 22:32

Viggen: Sep 10, 2010; by XyloJW

Jonny Quest posted:

It has the rear end of a Toyota, the front end of a Hyundai, and maybe the greenhouse of a melted Sebring. Allegedly the bulging lamps are some Japanese thing for aero or safety or something; not my thing, though.

They stole the wheels from ~~SAAB~~ BBS, circa '08. :colbert:

# ? Feb 7, 2014 04:03

mobby_6kl: Aug 9, 2009; by Fluffdaddy

dreesemonkey posted:

Pretty sure I read in the thread somewhere that Mazda isn't applying it's current design language to the ND for whatever reason, which is really unfortunate if you ask me

What? poo poo, that really blows as the current design applied to Miata proportions would result in one sexy muscular sportscar look that it always deserved. It might even have some power to back it up this time, especially if they could tune the SkyActive engines for more top-end power...

# ? Feb 7, 2014 11:50

Kia Soul Enthusias: May 9, 2004; zoom-zoom; Toilet Rascal

That seemed like an article with mostly random conjecture.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 13:18

Coredump: Dec 1, 2002

mobby_6kl posted:

It might even have some power to back it up this time, especially if they could tune the SkyActive engines for more top-end power...

Careful, you start asking for more power in a Miata baaaddd things happen.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 14:44

PeterWeller: Apr 21, 2003; I told you that story so I could tell you this one.

It's been over ten years since Mazda embarrassed themselves by overrating a sports car motor. Time to do it again. :v:

# ? Feb 7, 2014 18:53

donut: Feb 4, 2001

Toyota is obviously sick of being called boring.

FT-1 confirmed as next Supra, and new ~$16,000 sports car in development.

quote:

Radical coupe concept to morph into a born-again Supra; Toyota also developing sub-86 hybrid sports car

One of the hottest concepts unveiled at last month�s Detroit motor show was Toyota�s FT-1. No one will argue that point. What is controversial is how much meaning this radically styled coupe has in the real world.

While Toyota heads were saying the car was merely a concept conceived to celebrate the Calty design studio�s 40th anniversary as well as pay tribute to Polyphony Digital�s �Vision Gran Turismo� project, major publications were purporting the FT-1 to be the next-generation Supra.

Now we have the definitive verdict: It is. But there is another sports car in the mix as well. After a mandate from Toyota CEO Akio Toyoda calling for �cars that touch the heart�, a source close to Toyota has confirmed the company is busy developing not only the FT-1 as the next Supra, but a smaller sports car too.

�Priced at around $16,000 (in the US), this entry-level sports coupe will slot into the line-up under the successful 86,� says our insider.

Developed within a new sports car division headed up by none other than 86 chief engineer Tetsuya Tada, our source says these two next-generation coupes will form the base for a whole range of sports cars set to start joining the line-up from 2016.

Word from Toyoda went something like this. �If the FT-1 makes a good strong impression on the market, then we will add it to the line-up.�

We think Toyota knew this car was going to be a smash hit, because from what we are hearing it�s already well into the development phase. But don�t expect the finished product to land in showrooms looking like this. Our source says those sharp lines, scoops and edges will definitely be �softened� for the market.

This isn�t the first time we�ve seen an aggressively styled coupe boasting some of Toyota�s best hybrid hardware. The FT-HS concept coupe received rave reviews when it was unveiled in Detroit in 2007.

But the global financial crisis soon put this project on the back-burner, as car-makers were forced to tighten their belts. Now in 2014, Toyota is back with even raunchier styling and two powertrains.

The entry-level variant is expected to incorporate a turbocharged 2.0-litre petrol-four from the upcoming Lexus NX, while the flagship will employ a 2.5-litre turbo V6 hybrid powertrain generating more than 300kW.

Obviously the new Supra will be rear-wheel drive but it is also strongly rumoured to employ an LFA-style rear transaxle, meaning the new Supra could sell for less than $100,000 when it appears in showrooms as early as 2016.

Meanwhile, the smaller sports coupe said to slot in under the 86 should be powered by a 1.5-litre hybrid set-up and is set for a 2017 debut.

# ? Feb 9, 2014 23:40

Full Circle: Feb 20, 2008

donut posted:

Meanwhile, the smaller sports coupe said to slot in under the 86 should be powered by a 1.5-litre hybrid set-up and is set for a 2017 debut.

Oh boy another CR-Z...

# ? Feb 9, 2014 23:47

blueblueblue: Mar 18, 2009

Full Circle posted:

Oh boy another CR-Z...

I had this exact thought. Hybrids are hip and all, but the Fiesta ST is awesome with it's little turbo.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 00:08

Devyl: Mar 27, 2005; It slices!

It dices!

It makes Julienne fries!

A Supra for slightly under $100,000? That puts them in some dangerous waters with competitors in that price range. I hope it performs amazingly well and I hope they call the motor the 3JZ.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 00:14

Butt Wizard: Nov 3, 2005; It was a pornography store. I was buying pornography.

There have been Toyota WRC rumours of late but they involved a yaris type platform. potential new MR2?

# ? Feb 10, 2014 01:04

ynotony: Apr 14, 2003; Yea...this is pretty much the smartest thing I have ever done.

BMW is making the Supra with Toyota right? This will probably leverage BMW's CFRP manufacturing abilities, which hopefully means a carbon tub.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 01:09

Snowdens Secret: Dec 29, 2008; Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.

Is the implication that the transaxle is lowering the cost, or raising it?

If it's going to be close to six figures I hope they don't tone down the looks too much. Not like the GT-R or the zootier Corvettes are all that tame looking. Also that's the first time I've seen 'raunchier' used in press talk to describe a car, certainly not in any possibly complementary way.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 02:47

Throatwarbler: Nov 17, 2008; by vyelkin

Speaking of transaxles, found a pretty good writeup on the ZF 9 speed trans.

http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/2014/02/zfs-9-speed-9hp-transmission-puts-dog-clutches-on-the-leash/

quote:

In a week we will post our first full review of the all-new and all-controversial 2014 Jeep Cherokee. The new Jeep isn�t just raising eyebrows for the love-it or hate-it styling. Or the resurrection of the Cherokee badge. Or the constant delays in production. Or the transverse mounted engine. Or the lack of solid axles. None of that laundry list seems to cause as much discussion around the automotive water cooler than ZF�s 9HP 9-speed transmission. Click past the jump for a deep dive into the tranny with more speeds than my bicycle. If you don�t want to explore transmissions in detail, don�t click. You have been warned.

VVV Here, now you can still give it a quick look to see if you want to actually click the link. Happy now, you dick?

Throatwarbler fucked around with this message at 03:45 on Feb 10, 2014

# ? Feb 10, 2014 03:09

Goober Peas: Jun 30, 2007; Check out my 'Vette, bro

Good God throatwarbler, just post the link. We can click and read, ya know.

:downsgun:

# ? Feb 10, 2014 03:25

skipdogg: Nov 29, 2004; Resident SRT-4 Expert

Finally transmissions designed for real world highway driving.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 04:08

angryhampster: Oct 21, 2005

Throatwarbler posted:

Speaking of transaxles, found a pretty good writeup on the ZF 9 speed trans.

http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/2014/02/zfs-9-speed-9hp-transmission-puts-dog-clutches-on-the-leash/

VVV Here, now you can still give it a quick look to see if you want to actually click the link. Happy now, you dick?

The quote at the bottom struck me as interesting:

quote:

Are you willing to �sacrifice� shift quality at the altar of fuel economy? Be sure to let me know.

This seems ridiculous to me when the top sellers in the segment (Subaru Forester, Nissan Rogue) both use butter-smooth CVTs that offer better fuel economy in the city AND on the highway. I made a thread about it a month or so ago, but I think we'll continue to see CVTs take over the market in economy/family cars that don't make a ton of power.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 13:25

Oae Ui: Oct 7, 2003; Let's be friends.

donut posted:

�Priced at around $16,000 (in the US), this entry-level sports coupe will slot into the line-up under the successful 86,� says our insider.

Considering that a Corolla starts at $16.8k this seems highly unlikely. Unless they're just going to tart up a Yaris.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 17:20

Twerk from Home: Jan 17, 2009; This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.

Oae Ui posted:

Considering that a Corolla starts at $16.8k this seems highly unlikely. Unless they're just going to tart up a Yaris.

"Entry level sports coupe" is a Yaris with a spoiler and Scion branding.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 17:23

Xguard86: Nov 22, 2004; "You don't understand his pain. Everywhere he goes he sees women working, wearing pants, speaking in gatherings, voting. Surely they will burn in the white hot flames of Hell"

Twerk from Home posted:

"Entry level sports coupe" is a Yaris with a spoiler and Scion branding.

the Focus and Fiesta are tarted up econoboxes. I think a Yaris with some personality could work in theory its just that Toyota is so soulless these days its hard to believe they can capture the spirit and personality that makes a car like that work.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 17:27

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# ? May 26, 2024 19:45

Twerk from Home: Jan 17, 2009; This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.

Xguard86 posted:

the Focus and Fiesta are tarted up econoboxes. I think a Yaris with some personality could work in theory its just that Toyota is so soulless these days its hard to believe they can capture the spirit and personality that makes a car like that work.

The Focus ST and Fiesta ST both start above $20k and have powerful turbo engines from the Ford parts bin. I can't think of a lightweight, powerful engine that Toyota has in their stable, much less one that they could afford to put in a car that costs less than a base Corolla. Either their price goal is insane or it's a Yaris with the same old Yaris engine.

# ? Feb 10, 2014 17:31

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

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