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Fargo Fukes posted:We had to end the game a couple of turns early because she'd killed half the cast. You should do flashbacks for the rest of the turns if this happens again. Your mum sounds awesome.
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Feb 2, 2014 14:17
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That sounds like one hell of an awesome game. I'd love to get my family together for something like that. Have a feeling it'd be a night full of 
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Feb 2, 2014 21:41
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I had a good experience last night. It was also my first time rolling dice with others! We're playing Dungeon World and Nevermore214 is our GM. I'm afraid I don't remember everyone's SN. I'm playing Barry "the Hatchet" Iodine, a poleaxe-weilding fighter from a trading family that is more adept at guarding stuff than selling stuff. Along for the ride were Shanna, a witch, played by someone with a baby so they couldn't be there for the start of the session; Im-Dar, a lizardman Druid and the only one of the party that's actually good-aligned; Willam, a bard who is contractually obligated to write a ballad about my exploits under pain of pain and a penniless noble to boot; and lastly but not leastly Nif, a Shao-lin-style dwarf fighter who knows only martial arts and mining. We come up with some fun bonds between one another and we start the game. A shady dwarven caravan leader hires this band of misfits to escort him across the scrubland plains. We manage to find out there will almost certainly be an attack as the local tribes are very upset for some reason, so we extort him for more money and up-front hazard pay. We also find out he's smuggling crossbows, which takes some convincing to get him to admit - I borrow one for the journey, promising to take good care of it. He extorts one of us out of money for pipe-weed. We set off across the desert and scout ahead of the caravan. Im-Dar takes point and notices a band of tribesmen waiting to ambush us. We set up a quick plan - the bard will run back and tell the caravan to stop, Im-Dar will get into position to ambush from behind, and Nif and I will wait to launch our attack. We proceed to do so, but the band of tribesmen creeps ever closer to our position. At this point I decide to go ahead and get the drop on them, and spring from behind the tree and fire my 'borrowed' crossbow. I fail badly, and throw the now broken crossbow aside. Nif charges and nearly kills his target, and Im-Dar clamps on to the likely-looking leader of the band's foot as a crocodile. I decide to charge and hit hard - very hard. I skewer my target on my weapon, and take some damage as he swings his sword and dies. Im-Dar drags the leader down to the ground, and Nif finishes his opponent off. More mooks appeared, and I killed the last one of the initial group pretty brutally, intimidating them a bit. At this point, it looks like it's going to be a blood-bath, but Willam shows back up in the nick of time to initiate a parley. We learn that we're passing through land that the tribe claims to own, and that someone's poisoned their well - apparently a dwarf. Some of us start contemplating betraying our employer, but wiser heads prevail and we decide negotiations are in order, and we head back to the caravan. Now we arrive and quickly get down to brass tacks. The Witch player comes back from taking care of their baby and joins us. We try to get our employer and the raid leader to talk, but our employer is having none of it, and things turn nasty shortly, especially after the raid leader says he is sure that this is the dwarf that poisoned his well. The dwarf threatens to turn the guild of merchants against us. We beat him up anyway, with Im-Dar turning into a majestic yet tiny swamp deer for the tribe leader to ride into the fight. I demand that our employer tell us who is pulling the strings and who poisoned the well. He blames another dwarven caravan leader, who supposedly passed through the area recently but the tribesmen haven't seen another dwarf merchant at all. We learn that the only other place anyone would be likely to go is the Caves of Jok, a sacred and forbidden place to the tribesmen. We also learn Jok is, or was, a dragon. Now I realize nobody's heard of Jok, so the dragon is probably long dead, perhaps of old age. Surely we would know if there was a live dragon in the area, right? So I figure the other dwarf may be out to steal the dragon's horde before anyone else realizes the dragon's gone. I So on our first job we betrayed our employer, butchered the caravan company that hired us, burned most of their goods to ash, and have decided to aid tribesmen who initially wanted to kill us by curing their sick and poisoned fellows. I had a blast.
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Feb 3, 2014 19:31
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VanSandman posted:So on our first job we betrayed our employer, butchered the caravan company that hired us, burned most of their goods to ash, Had you not done the last thing (not listed), it would have been a wholly traditional RP D20 experience.
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Feb 3, 2014 20:11
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VanSandman posted:Im-Dar For whatever reason, this name reminded me of the fantastic dialogue from the film Beastmaster between Marc Singer and John Amos: Dar: I'm Dar. Of the Emerites. Seth: There are no more Emerites. Dar: Thanks to the Juns, I'm the last.
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Feb 3, 2014 21:30
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Well, looks like my GURPs game may have died. Running gurps on saturday, events that I've carefully foreshadowed for the last few months are starting to occur, most of the group has an idea of what's about to happen and are frantically preparing for a coup from the corporate police while one of the players complains incessantly about how he nothing he does is part of the plot while he plays on his game boy. The cops attack and the rest of the party dives for cover while he belligerently declares that he is going to try to take one of the NPCs on a date. Goes outside and notices the heavily armed cops surrounding his position and he starts bellowing, out of character, how he is going to annihilate them all. He has an ability that, using super effort, could do it. So he spends his fatigue and rolls will and manages to succeed. Then I ask where he wants to deliver this attack from and he says from on top of the building. I have previously explained to him the layout of his surroundings, a large school building on top of a hill, and that it's about 500 feet from the school grounds and street level. He goes up and I calculate his bonuses and penalties, shave off a fair number of negatives because what he's trying is fairly epic and tell he needs to get 6 or lower to score a direct hit. Rolls and gets an 11. I scatter it and figure out what he hits with what can only be described as the annihilation beam. He destroys the front of a line of buildings. At this point he's livid because he missed, and starts screaming about how I'm against his character doing anything cool. At this point one of the other players suggests that maybe the buildings will collapse and hit the cops. So I roll and some of the buildings fall forward and bury some of the cops in rubble but some of them avoid the wreckage. Now he yells that he gives up, cops win, he dies, game over takes his shirt of and stomps off to his room and takes a shower. At this point I stare at the rest of my group who are about as shell-shocked as I am and say. "Well...good game guys...see you next week I guess." Received a call yesterday from some members of the group, looks like no one, myself included, is particularly interested in a repeat performance.
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Feb 3, 2014 22:05
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Badgersmasher posted:Well, looks like my GURPs game may have died. Looks more like it's time to tell the other players that you're kicking That Guy out.
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Feb 3, 2014 22:11
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FredMSloniker posted:Looks more like it's time to tell the other players that you're kicking That Guy out. Seriously, he sounds about as fun as a fart in an elevator. Tell him it's clear he's not having a good time, sorry it didn't work out.
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Feb 3, 2014 22:17
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With any other player I would have no problems with doing so; unfortunately he's the one hosting the group, so I'm going to need to acquire a new venue once I remove him from the game.
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Feb 3, 2014 22:21
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From the behaviour of that guy it sounds like You can just start checking out the undersides of local bridges, and working your way up.
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Feb 3, 2014 22:36
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Badgersmasher posted:With any other player I would have no problems with doing so; unfortunately he's the one hosting the group, so I'm going to need to acquire a new venue once I remove him from the game.
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Feb 3, 2014 23:05
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I'm doing a Skype game of Red Hand of Doom with some fellow goons, and we decided to switcc to 4e, because I was just getting burned out on 3.5e. Tonight, we got together and made characters. What followed was quite possibly some of the best concepts for characters I've seen in a long, long time. Phoebe the Kellerin the Deva Shaman - Still lacking in hard backstory, all I know for certain is that this guy is a rough adaptation of the Ranger he was playing in 3.5e. Except now the dog he was using is the dearly departed ghost of said dog. And may or may not have been his entire reason for picking that class. Siera Deluxxe the Horseless Headless Horsemonk - Farmgirl gets her head kicked off by a horse. Horse is rendered into glue. Raven Queen accidentally resurrects farmgirl AND horse. Farmgirl raises her middle finger to her 'mission' and wanders off to go do whatever, unlife's too short to live it for someone else. Everywhere she goes, people see zombie woman carrying her own head around. By sheer coincidence, between her appearance, and the sorts of people she ends up getting in fights with being the kind that towns are glad to be rid of, she gets mistaken as an adventurer, and just goes with it. Splig, King of All Goblins - Yes, that Splig. Splig is a Goblin. A very big, very fat, very bossy goblin. (How big? He's a reskinned human.) He crushes the heads of any other goblins who refuse to call him King of All Goblins. Red Hand of Doom is a module about a half-dragon warlord declaring himself ruler of the goblins and trying to raise an army. Well, Splig isn't about to just let someone else say they're in charge! What kind of King of All Goblins would he be, if he didn't enforce his rule (and adamantly refuse to either speak or respond to any language but Goblin)? The hook was that they all got word of an abandoned keep, supposedly haunted, but full of treasure. And they aren't about to let a few ghost stories get between them and some easy money! I swear, we haven't even played yet, and this is my favorite party in a long time.  Guys, if you're reading this, you're great. (And Sagan, I can't wait until your schedule clears up and you can get in on this madness.)
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Feb 4, 2014 09:16
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VanSandman posted:The rest of the party cleans up easily, with Im-Dar delivering a vicious People's Elbow after turning back into a lizardman while flying as a heron and Shanna stone-cold dropping a dude from her broomstick to kill him. Thank you for this - made my lousy day. I'd like to see a .gif of the bold bit.
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Feb 4, 2014 18:00
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VanSandman posted:I had a good experience last night. It was also my first time rolling dice with others! We're playing Dungeon World and Nevermore214 is our GM. I'm afraid I don't remember everyone's SN. Wow. I'm on my lunch break at work right now, and you made my rather crappy previous night/morning today a lot better. I never thought one of the players would be posting anything in the notable experiences thread! Also, you make me sound so competent. I like sounding competent. Even if the truth was that I needed a lot of help with the rules from the very beginning. You guys were a blast to GM for, and a welcome first experience outside of my old group. I had so much fun I actually posted up a second campaign for goons that I want to run. For the record, the group is VanSandman, Teonis, Radioactivebears, Clown Contagion, and MizPiz. They're a cool bunch of dudes.
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Feb 4, 2014 19:52
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I have a great, short experience to share. So, group of us playing a straightforward dungeon crawling game using Pathfinder. We come across a room in a decrepit, decaying dungeon with an oddly clean and intact armoire, just sitting in the middle of a stone room in a dungeon full of monsters. Of course, we start joking about how this is obviously a mimic, and it's going to eat whoever looks into it. I even jokingly suggest we stick it a few times with the tip of our sunrod to see if it flinches. We laugh and dither a bit. Then our party "leader" opens it up and looks inside. And it bites his face off...because it's a mimic. It had been all along and our DM had been struggling to keep a poker face while we were joking about it. We actually managed to double-bluff ourselves. We were so caught up in how obviously it seemed like a mimic that we never actually bothered to take any precautions against the possibility of it being an actual mimic. The ambush was so obvious we walked right into it! It also reminds me of another incident where I also had to keep a very straight face while allowing a PC to hang themselves (almost literally in this case). This is an eberron game and the PCs are forced to camp while still in the Mournlands. I had already planned an encounter with a powerful, blood-drinking tree monster that would trap sleeping PCs with rootlets and drain their blood, and fight them once they woke up. Well, the PCs take the initial bait and make camp under the shelter of the tree. They start taking watch and preparing to bed down for the night. Well, one PC decides he doesn't feel safe on the ground so he climbs the tree and, just to make sure he doesn't fall off and hurt himself, ties himself to a branch. Of course, once the tree's nature is revealed and the fight starts he's among the last to know (since he wasn't attacked by the rootlets) and he spends the fight being swung at neck-breaking speeds from the end of a short rope attached to a branch of an evil mutant tree-monster. I think the tree actually used him as a bludgeon against his allies a few times.
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Feb 6, 2014 08:07
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oriongates posted:I have a great, short experience to share. For a minute there I thought your group had found the legendary Armoire of Invincibility. That was a better outcome though.
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Feb 6, 2014 12:16
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Dear god I love the mental image of the party paranoiac swinging through the air. That made my night.
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Feb 6, 2014 12:46
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oriongates posted:I have a great, short experience to share. The first tale reminds of a time a few members of my group got together for a quick oneshot. We were going through a chunk of the dungeon, and my rogue was disabling a alarm traps on the rooms and using coup de grace on the sleeping orcs. This happened for like 5-6 rooms. We get to the last room with orcs, who were also sleeping. and I just walked in. All of a sudden the alarms go off, and the orcs wake up, and it's time to roll for initiative.
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Feb 7, 2014 04:59
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We were investigating an abandoned lab and everything in it just screamed "there will be zombies!" It was so obvious we assumed the gm was messing with us until we opened a door and got swarmed.
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Feb 7, 2014 15:06
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I am playing in a solo Pathfinder campaign in the city of Freeport and had an awesome fight last night that I thought I'd share. For those of you who don't know, the City of Freeport campaign setting is basically "Pirates of the Caribbean" meets H.P. Lovecraft. There are evil, drug-addled and/or crazy cultists everywhere, insidious serpent people shapechanged into human form, a corrupt Captain's Council, the Society of the Velvet Whip, pirates, apocalyptic encounters and lot, lots, lots of grog. To (not) blend in to this completely over the top Mediterranean setting, I am playing an over the top, 13-year old's fantasy: A lawful-evil female drow I-poo poo-you-not swashbuckler/rogue/ninja/wizard. All of her feats and skills are designed to make her into a dual-wielding stabby parkour-using glass-cannon, with tons of boxes in fly, acrobatics, spellcraft, perception and stealth so she can use her spider-climb, levitate and fly spells to have stand-sideways-on-walls and swinging-from-the-rigging fights with dual rapiers a la Errol Flyn. My schpiel is that she left the Underdark because the neutral-evil batshit-craziness of Drow society is just plain wasteful and she wanted a place where she could impose her own order and discipline on the world. We play rather fast and loose with the rules because me and the GM agree that it's more about a good story than adhering to the rules. As it turns out, just about all of her human adventuring buddies (NPCs) have died off because she's a loving self-centered Drow who keeps leaving them behind to die so her current gang consists of: -- a necromancer barkeep whose inn, "the Indecipherable Scroll" is staffed by ghosts and unseen servants who serve the patrons. She is responsible for keeping the two flesh golems that guard my smuggling warehouse intact. She and I killed her twin sister who was helping some Cultists try to end the world. -- a zombie rogue named Alaina, who was killed early on in the campaign and was brought back to unlife by the necromancer. She vaguely remembers dying but hasn't quite figured out that she's a zombie and is puzzled by the fact that she doesn't need to east, sleep or breathe. And I haven't told her. When she starts getting a little rank around the edges and a little too beat up, I send her for a "facial" to the necromancer who stitches up the slashes, and pretties her up with unguents. In this last fight she had her head chopped completely off, but had it reattached by the necromancer because this character is just too drat fun to let die. -- a street-urchin named William who sleeps in an orphanage run by Mr. Cleaves. I've just found out that William is the ghoul who has been following me around at night and helping me dispose of the bodies of my kills. I've also just found out that Mr. Cleaves is actually a head priest of a cult of child-ghouls, but the kids are all really nice. "They might be cannibal ghoul children, but they're OUR cannibal ghoul children." -- a self-centered human paladin with a pet white rhinoceros (In a Mediterranean port town? Sure! It's Freeport!) who puts up with me and my evilness because every successful adventure we go on and every time we save the town, I let him take all of the credit because I prefer to work from the angles of the corners of the shadows. Him getting all the credit scores him tons of trim from grateful womenfolk so he tosses off my evilness with "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" morality framework and this is Freeport after all. -- the head priest of the Temple of the God of Knowledge who I uncovered that is actually a serpent person who is working for the rebuilding of the serpent person race as it existed before the breaking of the world. Since I didn't out him, he is extremely grateful and becomes my source of healing and lore and stuff. I actually cleaned out a fallen temple for him and ended up bringing about the hatching of the fabled Savior serpent kid from an egg I found during one of my adventures. I'm helping raise this serpent messiah as its "auntie". etc. So anyways, last night was a culmination of events that I'd brought about in the recovering of the egg and the hatching of the Savior. I had recovered a jade idol that was to help hatch the egg from a gang of "Monster Hunters" led by this wickedly fast vampire and his bride and minions. In the process of stealing this statue I sorta set fire to the crypt that stored all of the vampire coffins and then sorta set fire to their ship that held their reserve coffins and killed the head vampire's bride. Suffice it to say the vampire was pissed. But I thought he dies in the blaze. This came back to get me last night. I fled the scene and returned the jade idol to the head priest who hatched the egg in a really cool ceremony and I was feeling all smug with myself so I went back to the Temple of Knowledge to get inside before the sun rose and I started getting my migraine from being in sunlight. Last night's session starts with me in my small-clothes in a meditation cell when I hear a shriek, cut off. Being me, I immediately assume the worst and start gearing up and activating my at-will spells (spider-climb/levitate/feather-fall) for some parkour goodness as I hear pandemonium ramping up outside: I hear sounds of brief skirmishes, creams cut off and a low roar of high-pitched squeaking. Finished gearing up I open the door to my cell to pitch blackness and confusion. All of the lanterns and magical "continual light" stones that illuminate the temple have been snuffed out but I can see that there is a sea of rats flooding in from the back cellar that are attacking anyone and every thing. With no way to handle this and thinking it was a diversion, I look to the front of the temple where I see a shadow moving against the blackness (yay, critical success spot check!) and whip off a faerie fire to illuminate it (reflex save!) as it ducks into the cell where the second in command of the Temple sleeps. I throw out some ninja ki points to haste myself and boost agility and haul rear end after the (now glowing) thing. I run past the disembodied corpse of Alaina and get to the cell to see the second in command dead from a mighty wound across the face and the back of a faintly glowing figure as it rips the bars off the window and flees out and up with inhuman speed. I give chase out the window, taking care to not get ambushed, and we have this awesome chase spider-climbing up walls, across rooftops, leaping over alleyways and basically trying to get in opportunities to ambush each other. The figure is now invisible, but glowing from the faerie fire so I can track it (Here we actually had to stop and check the rules and while the source of the light is invisible, the light itself is not so we had this cool image of a umbra/penumbra effect flowing over rooftops as I chased it down.) We finally engage on the top of this random temple, a hundred feet off the ground and, as dawn is coming and I'm not letting up, the Vampire turns to engage- trying to kill me before the sunlight destroys him utterly. He tries to dominate me into submission but my spell resistance saves me, so I let him think that he has. I kneel in submission and as he comes close to lop my head off, I stab the poo poo out of him with my rapiers. He reels back and calls down a flame strike down from the heavens, but my spell-resistance again protects me, and we start to hammer on each other- him with a gently caress you two-handed sword and me with my rapiers of frost and flame. He comes at me on the roof tops and I get in some pretty good shots with my rapiers as I frantically backpedal around the roof trying to use all manner of spider-climbing/acrobatics/fly to strike quickly and get away before he finally wallops on me. He tries and gets in a successful disarm on my flame rapier sending it flying over the side of the temple, but using reflexes and some spellcraft I get in a quick Hand of the Apprentice (a low-level ability that allows me to magically throw any hand-held weapon and retrieve it in the same round) and summon my rapier back to me, taunting him with his ineffectiveness. But then we go a few rounds with tiles from the roof skittering down over the side to smash against the street a hundred feet below and I'm getting tired out and he finally connects solidly with me dropping me half of my total hit points with one hit. I freak out by the power of the hit and levitate away upwards out of reach to quaff a potion of healing as his wounds continue to regenerate as well. So now I'm down a bunch and I've been walloping on him a bunch and taking hits in return but his poo poo is regenerating and I'm getting tired and he tells me that he'll enjoy killing me before he goes out with the rising of the sun. I'm pissed off and want to kill him (instead of just waiting for the sun to rise) which turns out to be a huge mistake. Still levitating, I pull and throw a flask of oil and it shatters on him and I Hand of the Apprentice my flaming rapier into him the next round, scoring a hit and igniting the oil. But this on-fire motherfucker springs his own jump spell and I have a chance to evade and stab, but I utterly blow the rolls and he slams into me and we grapple in mid-air. His slam does some physical and burn damage taking me into single digit hit points and, continuing to watch my luck go sour, I blow my concentration check and my levitate winks out and we both start to fall the 100' to the street below. I'm trying to get a feather-fall going, but then we both remember the vampire's negative-levels-from-physical-contact thing. I take two negative levels which drops me unconscious as I'm falling so I don't get the full benefits from my half-completed feather fall, and black out before we both slam into the street. End of Session Agrikk fucked around with this message at 20:47 on Feb 7, 2014 |
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Feb 7, 2014 20:38
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TheDemon posted:Hijinks in my group's FATE Accelerated game last night. You are really underselling it. Not only did we disarm the villain. Until the local authorities intervened, he was going to be left in a locked up barn that the archaeologist in our party decided to turn into Farm Flambe. Locked him in a burning barn like in a scene out of O Brother Where Art Thou. The pacifist wizard didnt get shot with any standard gun. A Whirlwind gun that flung him into the side of a shed and knocked him clean unconscious. The Druid who ran around with the Orbital Lazer did so as at first a panther, then as she continued to try and escape harassment, she shifted into being a house cat. She eventually hid in the pacifist wizard's robe while he lay unconscious. The "NORMAL EVERY DAY HUMAN" ( Totally not a fairy in disguise ) used one gun ( a glue gun ) to glue the other to its own hand. Somewhere in all this i forgot the fact that a freaking Death Lazer Beam of Light shot down from the sky, scaring our "Pacifist wizard" who is an albino shadow mage who hates light. What kills me is after all this, we absconded with said death beam's aiming and trigger mechanism. So our party scored a ORBITAL DEATH LAZER. I'm not totally sure in the next couple of sessions we arent going to somehow turn around our good deeds into being a quartet of haphazard super villains. I love our group.
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Feb 7, 2014 21:08
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More Unknown Armies fun, with a couple of quick highlights from their showdown with a rogue Appelomancer (who'd used his power over names to turn a small town in South Dakota into his private playground, forever stuck in an idealised 1952). The party Kleptomancer decided to prepare for their showdown by spending a day breaking into houses and taking things in order to generate magical charges. One thing lead to another and a couple of critical fails later she found herself in the front room of the town sheriff, holding a fistful of his valuables, as he tromped down the stairs. She tried to escape through the (closed) window for lack of any better route out, failed that, got shot by the sheriff. Things looked bad until she rolled the best possible crit success to use her Steal Breath spell and asphyxiated him. The rest of the party heard the gunshot from their house a few doors down and arrived to find Lacey bleeding from a bullet wound on the picket-fenced lawn, a blue-faced dead sheriff next to her. The showdown itself did not end how I expected at all. Knowing the Appelomancer was going to be crowned Homecoming King that night they disguised themselves in appropriate attire (the kleptomancer stole the sheriff's hat and used a spell that made her perfectly resemble him as long as she wore it) and attended. They wait for him to get up on stage, the klepto climbs up next to him. "Ah, my loyal right-hand man," the appelomancer announces. "I do believe there are some ne'erdowells here tonight. That's one," he says, pointing at another party member, "kill him for me." The klepto plays along, draws her gun... and then unloads it into the appelomancers gut at point blank range. He goes down and most of the party run for the stage to sort things out. By the time they get there though he's just some random dead highschool kid, and someone in the crowd calls out "the fun thing about being Nobody is you can be Anybody!" before sucker punching the party's tough guy. I figured there'd be some sort of fight here, that they'd do something to lure him away from the crowd and trap him in one body, that they'd use the special weird spirit sword they'd found earlier to hurt him. Anything really. That is not what happened. The epideromancer, who draws her power from self harm, asks "When it says I can use a major charge to redesign someone else's body, how much can I redesign them?" "Well, major charges are basically plot devices, so as extensively as you want really. But you know that getting a major charge means-" "Yup. I disembowel myself." So the rogue appelomancer suddenly turns into a featureless blob of flesh, unable to use magic, and the epideromancer collapses to the stage, bleeding to death from her self-inflicted machete wound. It so happens, by genuine coincidence, that she's wearing a necklace the party found back at the start which contains a one-shot resurrection spell. But none of them know that, including her or the character with a decade long unrequited crush on her. So that's a fun cliffhanger. I think what I love about this game is the way that all the adept schools drive the players to get themselves into all kinds of trouble without the GM needing to prod them much. When your party members gain magic power by variously hurting themselves, stealing things, taking risks, not sleeping and making people angry it pretty much writes itself.
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Feb 7, 2014 21:54
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Doomsayer posted:Yeah I know, that's how I got my incredible undergrad group together. Alright I chose the last option, filled up a Big Gulp with rum and coke, went to go play some 3.5. (I actually went last week and a fellow goon got me into a decent-but-not-incredible World of Darkness game that went reasonably well, but they weren't playing this week) I brought my 1st level utilidruid, built around having a good time and helpin' my bros. Our adventure began in the city of Hero's Keep, which is apparently a thing since goon friend's module also started there (we tried to get into a game together but that is verboten). We were contacted by a peacekeeper for the local... I dunno, mob boss I guess. He had a job for us, and referred us to a turquoise-haired peacekeeper named Jenny... Officer Jenny. She told us that a nearby town had been having a problem with "strange reptiles with turtle shells". My response of "So... turtles, then?" was not appreciated. She gives us the following mission, verbatim: "We need you to get rid of the turtles, but don't let the townsfolk see you hurt them." Our party consisted of me (a level 1 gnome druid), 2 rogues (level 1 and level 4, forgot their names), and a level 1 (technically) Grey Render fighter. The Grey Render elected to climb on the roof of the carriage for the ride to Vermillion City (yes the town was literally called Vermillion City), and I elected to join him as I had been drinking (both in-game and in real life!  ). We got to town and immediately set off in our search.Fighter: "I climb on the roof of the inn. (He liked roofs)" Rogues: "We go search the alley behind the hospital." Me: "I go find the nearest patch of tall grass and wander around back and forth in it." ...the DM gave me a death glare. The two rogues didn't find anything (Grey Render just continued to chill on the roof) so started search elsewhere. I went to go find the gym. The DM said it was just a gym, where they lift anvils. So I lifted anvils for a while. Finally, the DM tells the rogues they find something! Rogues: "Hey, there's a hole leading underground in this alley!" Fighter: "I jump down! Me: "Hang on a sec, I don't have any thunder or grass magic prepared." Another glare from the DM. Long story short we climb down and begin killing turtles. They start yelling some stuff about "No please, stop!" and "The humans took our land, we just want it back!" and poo poo, but gently caress that we got a job to do and we're getting paid. Grey Render and I press forward, I throw down an entangle that basically fills up the whole cave, rendering them all drat near helpless (each turtle had 1HP a piece, but AC as high as a dude in platemail). They can't do much more than 1 damage to us. The rogues start yelling at us, trying to trip us and grapple us. Neither is successful. Fighter and I spend over forty turns slowly killing our way through the turtles. There were 25 of them. No swarm rules, no making them a mob. Nope, just roll individually for each turtle. Just me, my wolf companion, and the fighter plinking away at them. Finally we butcher all of them, Grey Render picks up some meat for soup and swipes a couple eggs, then picks up the shades from the lead turtle (just in case you didn't realize this was literally that squirtle episode from the Pokemon cartoon) and gives them to me. So the good news is, my wolf now has a  pair of tiny shades.So we leave, find Officer Jenny, and are told our money is back in Hero's Keep. Fighter and I immediately hike off to get our reward. The rogues stay behind and gather up all the body detritus, drag it in sacks into the police station at night when everyone is gone, and build a literal statuary fountain out of bones and meat. No, I don't know why. But I got 450 gold so...  At this point I'm thinking of volunteering to DM because drat, it can't be any worse, right? The good news is, drinking during the games really helped mitigate the terribleness. Doomsayer fucked around with this message at 07:55 on Feb 8, 2014 |
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Feb 8, 2014 07:29
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Doomsayer posted:Our adventure began in the city of Hero's Keep, which is apparently a thing since goon friend's module also started there (we tried to get into a game together but that is verboten). Wait. There's a rule that states you can't choose to play with specific people?
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Feb 8, 2014 07:59
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Bieeardo posted:Wait. There's a rule that states you can't choose to play with specific people? Yes. My friend was running late and I asked the person handing out tickets: "Hey is it cool if my friend and I play together? She's kinda new (a lie, but meh) and we were hoping to be in the same group." "No, that's not how it works." "...seriously? We're both level 1, fresh characters, can't we just-" "No. It's favoritism."
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Feb 8, 2014 08:16
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Doomsayer posted:Yes. My friend was running late and I asked the person handing out tickets: "Hey is it cool if my friend and I play together? She's kinda new (a lie, but meh) and we were hoping to be in the same group."   No game is always better than bad game.
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Feb 8, 2014 08:20
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Doomsayer posted:Yes. My friend was running late and I asked the person handing out tickets: "Hey is it cool if my friend and I play together? She's kinda new (a lie, but meh) and we were hoping to be in the same group." Don't go back, they're dumb and bad.
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Feb 8, 2014 08:20
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Eh, it's an excuse to start drinking at like 4. Would you guys rather I not have content for the thread? 
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Feb 8, 2014 08:25
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Doomsayer posted:Eh, it's an excuse to start drinking at like 4. Would you guys rather I not have content for the thread?
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Feb 8, 2014 08:28
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Doomsayer posted:"No. It's favoritism." quote:"Squirt. Squirtle! Yeeeah, I can just imagine how that little rule came into existence. Christ almighty. Those geek social fallacies that people like to point out are supposed to be warning signs, not guidelines.
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Feb 8, 2014 08:28
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Doomsayer posted:For real though, I honestly have given up on them. gently caress 'em, I'm done. I feel bad leaving all those poor uneducated souls to rot, but maybe they'll show up in my classes and I'll risk getting fired by bringing them into the fold. I'll keep checking the forum in case someone posts a sane-sounding game, or maybe occasionally use it to get a Dungeon World game going. But as for meetings? gently caress it, no gaming is better than bad gaming. Or maybe I'll just go, get a little liquored up beforehand, and Funhave as hard as I can Funhave. The "oh if only thy souls were enlightened with the glory of moderne gamese~" stuff is hilarious. I know you're exaggerating and all that but trust me, they'd be poo poo regardless of system. It's not like 13th Age is going to transform them into different people.
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Feb 8, 2014 08:29
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The Leper Colon V posted:For your own peace of mind, yes. Sharing tales of lovely gaming is cathartic, but going out and looking for it is a bad move at best, yes.
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Feb 8, 2014 08:36
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Meh, it's something to do on Fridays. Once I find something to do on Fridays I'll do it but for now it's fun vv
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Feb 8, 2014 08:54
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Ok I'm posting on my phone so I'm not quoting nothing, but when I said play a wizard, destroy the game and you said I will, but a druid, I didn't read that as I will play their stupid game where I kill turtles for over an hour with a grey render, which has 3 intelligence and zero interesting fluff how is that even a playable race?!. entangle doesn't break the game, it defeats enemies. from a quick scan of the 3.0 spell list the best arsehole spell is invisibility to animals. No save. Get creative. Alternately, offer to run a game, tell them you'll be rolling all the dice or doing all the math and just play fae or dungeon world or something. on a positive note, I'm so desperate for a game I actually envy you, so it could be worse
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Feb 8, 2014 14:55
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Our time-traveling Goblin game took a strange turn recently. After looting a strange wardrobe from a cave, we brought it back to our village along with a bunch of fireworks (FIRWORKS!!  ). The chief, brimming with malevolent victory, ordered us to ambush passing caravans, which we did and in triumph strapped looted pots & pans to our bodies and we may or may not have eaten a bard. I don't remember. Unfortunately, a posse of humans came after us - with a steely-eyed paladin leading the charge. After killing our leader, we booked it into the wardrobe & ended up coming out of another wardrobe in the past. We knew it was the past because that steely-eyed paladin was a baby in the house where we came out. What do you suppose a group of murder-hobo players & their goblin characters decided to do? Kill the baby of course. The mother ran screaming out of the house with the baby & our witch hypnotized dad.  "You shoot an arrow. It hits the baby." "Do baby's get Reflex saves?""Baby's do not get reflex saves."I had to step in with my cleric & save the baby's life, getting an ungobliny rep as a goody-goody "moral center" of the group. I just didn't want to kill a baby in game. 
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Feb 8, 2014 16:27
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Patience posted:I just didn't want to kill a baby in game.
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Feb 8, 2014 20:38
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rock rock posted:Ok I'm posting on my phone so I'm not quoting nothing, but when I said play a wizard, destroy the game and you said I will, but a druid, I didn't read that as I will play their stupid game where I kill turtles for over an hour with a grey render, which has 3 intelligence and zero interesting fluff how is that even a playable race?!. You can only break the game so much when you're limited to level 1, PHB1. I dunno why that guy was allowed to play something weird like that, but he's one of the officers of the club, I think? I dunno, here's there all the time, I know that. No psionics, warforged, dragonborn, etc. But monster classes are cool, I guess? Oh, and the official response I got for why there are no psionics? "They're too intimidating to newcomers."
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Feb 8, 2014 20:56
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Patience posted:I just didn't want to kill a baby in game. Funny you mention this. A few years back we were re-running the Against the Giants series because we thought it would be fun to revisit an adventure series that we'd originally played in the early 80's. Adventure G1 basically has you kicking in the front door of the home of a hill giant clan and slaughtering everyone. When we were all eleven and having fun rolling dice and enjoying the size of the plusses on our character sheets killing everything was a fun little dungeon grind. But time did a funny thing to us and when our characters broke into a hill giant nursery and attacked we realized that we were basically slaughtering children in the name of "good". It was a weird moment for all involved, since the term murderhobo hadn't been invented yet and we all felt...dirty...after that adventure was completed and the slaughter was over. We took the campaign arc to it's conclusion and ultimately defeated Lolth on her home plane, but our group ended up changing the tone of the campaign after that first adventure. As we crawled the subsequent adventures we were a little more direct in dealing our damage and more subtle in our approaches to avoid more slaughter. It's weird because obviously all of these "events" existed solely in our imagination and yet we all started feeling guilty for reducing the numbers on a piece of paper to zero according to a set of structured rules indicating how to do so.
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Feb 8, 2014 22:43
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Patience posted:I just didn't want to kill a baby in game. Easy answer to this one. Don't kill the baby. Since you've now orphaned him, or will soon I suspect, you can just drop him off at a temple of an evil god that is sympathetic to goblins. When you get back to your own time you should meet up with a very talented anti-paladin.
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Feb 8, 2014 22:54
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| # ? May 13, 2024 22:34 |
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I was in my first full Promethean game last week and the goon that run it was really good with the group dynamic, I nearly got kicked out for making three axe puns but that was all in good fun, I am really enjoying the setup for this story.
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Feb 8, 2014 22:56
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