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Chillao
Jan 12, 2004
discerning gentleman

quote:

The field consists of three concentric circles. On the outer circle are the four Kronum goals which are shared by the two teams. In front of every goal is a round Goal Zone and a rectilinear Wedge Zone. Bordering the Wedge Zone is the Flex Zone. The only difference between the two zones is that the use of hands in the Wedge Zone is restricted. Then is the Cross Zone, having the shape of a cross. In the middle of the field there is a smaller ring called the Second Ring, and inside that, the Prime Ring.

:wtc:

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Blue Star Error
Jun 11, 2001

For this recipie you will need:
Football match (Halftime of), Celebrity Owner (Motivational speaking of), Sherry (Bottle of)
The first circle of Kronum contains the unbaptised and the virtuous pagans

Pantsuit
Oct 28, 2013

Blue Screen Error posted:

This is my favourite bit, fast paced exciting statistics

american football isn't even fast paced. it's one of the slowest and most boring sports ever invented. have a look in TFF and see what the 'required reading' is.

advanced statsman
Dec 26, 2012

ISLAM FC

Byolante posted:

America just did what they did when they turned out to be poo poo at Rugby and Cricket, invented a new sport only they play to dominate. Ladies and Gentleman, may I give to you the new sport of 2014, KRONUM!

i thought cuba and japan were better at baseball anyway

Paperhouse
Dec 31, 2008

I think
your hair
looks much
better
pushed
over to
one side
First off, let me say that I don't play soccer and don't even really watch it. BUT, what if a player like LeBron James played soccer. He is 6'8" tall, has a 44 inch vertical jump, and can run around like a man much smaller than himself.

I'm not a soccer expert, but why couldn't a team put LeBron James near the goal and just kick the ball up high where only he can reach it and he can put headers in the net all day?

belgend
Mar 6, 2008

me when The Club do another win

tetsman posted:

i thought cuba and japan were better at baseball anyway

They haven't been best at baseball for a while http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baseball_World_Cup / http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Baseball_Classic

jyrka
Jan 21, 2005


Potato Count: 2 small potatoes

I bet they're going to say those tournaments don't matter. They're going to say it because USA aren't any good in those.

Popehoist
Feb 5, 2008

There you go rubens, all your fault! You went on the wrong side of the car!

ephex
Nov 4, 2007





PHWOAR CRIMINAL

This picture will trigger Kwaggas PTSD.

Strawman
Feb 9, 2008

Tortuga means turtle, and that's me. I take my time but I always win.



England have won as many world cups in baseball as they have in football. I'd say that was about right.

pik_d
Feb 24, 2006

follow the white dove





TRP Post of the Month October 2021

Strawman posted:

England have won as many world cups in baseball as they have in football. I'd say that was about right.

Two World Wars, Two World Cups

African AIDS cum
Feb 29, 2012


Welcome back, welcome back, welcome baaaack

Pantsuit posted:

american football isn't even fast paced. it's one of the slowest and most boring sports ever invented. have a look in TFF and see what the 'required reading' is.

No it is really good and it is fast and brutal as hell. The thing is its an anaerobic sport whereas soccer is an aerobic sport

Chris de Sperg
Aug 14, 2009


Pantsuit posted:

american football isn't even fast paced. it's one of the slowest and most boring sports ever invented. have a look in TFF and see what the 'required reading' is.
Not all games of American football are played with commercial breaks.

chuggo is BACK
Jul 1, 2008




"Chuggo"

PWM POTM December 2014
American football owns let's not let this get in the way of the real issue: they're bad at football

The Mash
Feb 17, 2007

You have to say I can open my presents

Good on the Sun for reporting to the truth about Januzaj way back then

ephex
Nov 4, 2007





PHWOAR CRIMINAL

vaginal culture posted:

No it is really good and it is fast and brutal as hell. The thing is its an anaerobic sport whereas soccer is an aerobic sport

Your brain is anerobic.

Mickolution
Oct 1, 2005

Ballers...I put numbers on the boards

Strawman posted:

England have won as many world cups in baseball as they have in football. I'd say that was about right.

Well they did invent both sports.

fat gay nonce
May 13, 2003
actual penis length: |-----------|



Winner, PWM POTM January

chuggo is BACK posted:

American football owns let's not let this get in the way of the real issue: they're bad at football

You can tell it doesn't when you#ve got a boring troll, an autistic childe and a monkey saying it does

chuggo is BACK
Jul 1, 2008




"Chuggo"

PWM POTM December 2014

fat gay nonce posted:

You can tell it doesn't when you#ve got a boring troll, an autistic childe and a monkey saying it does

Boring troll zzz

TinTower
Apr 21, 2010

You don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.

crappledan
Dec 17, 2009

Serious Title Contenders

\

Ewar Woowar
Feb 25, 2007

Why Messi doesn´t play for USA soccer team?
He is from USA and he is white, why he doesn´t play for America?

We can win the World Cup with him!

Paperhouse
Dec 31, 2008

I think
your hair
looks much
better
pushed
over to
one side

chuggo is BACK posted:

Boring troll zzz

Eric Cantonese
Dec 21, 2004

You should hear my accent.

quote:

Alright you little media fuckers.

Wanna hear a real analysis? We’re sick of your poo poo.Now get out your loving pad and paper cause I’m about to drop the news on your asses.

We’re still in this bitch. Liverpool are on top. We’re closer than you give us credit, however. We still have 2 extra games to play. There’s still a hell of a lot of football to be played. It’s Liverpool’s to lose now. While they wait for the glory to roll in, we’re fighting for ours.

So talk your talk. Go congratulate your lovely little Suarez boy. Enjoy it while you can. Cause we’re coming. If you don’t think a loss like this propels us forward, you’re in for a rather rude awakening.

But who gives a gently caress anyway, right? We’re not really here.

"Besides, we’re experts at pulling off miracles." - Vincent Kompany

I’m out. See you on the pitch, bitches.

quote:

Right, you've been singing Munich songs long before Hillsborough, even taking banners to games where you killed people.

Soz I'm not arsed about the 96. I really couldn't care less about them. You lot weren't arsed about ours before that. Can't have it both ways now.

Eric Cantonese fucked around with this message at 05:19 on Apr 14, 2014

Ewar Woowar
Feb 25, 2007

Why Soccer Sucks

The ever-growing list of reasons why soccer sucks.

Why not use your hands? Or your brain?

Pompous pseudo-intellectual Europeans who become soccer fans in order to convince the populace of their link to the common man.

The correct term for 0 is zero, not nil. Take a math class.

Soccer participants on the same team have different jerseys. The obviously higher intelligence of hockey (goaltender) or football (offensive linemen) fans and referees is evident, since we don't need a different uniform to indicate a different privilege in the rule book

Soccer apologists say the reason it is not popular in the US is because it wasn't invented in the US. First, soccer originated from the North American game called pasuckuakohowog several hundred years before the British played something resembling it. Second, basketball was the creation of a Canadian, yet is very popular in the US. Third, football was the creation of a Canadian, yet is very popular in the US.

Soccer apologists say the reason it is not popular in the US is because the US is not any good at that activity. The US soccer team won the World Cup in 1991 and 1999. Better find another reason.

Soccer apologists steal terms from real sports. Hint: a pitch is something an option QB does. A draw is a running play designed to counter a strong pass rush. Football is a real sport that involves athletes in pads and helmets, not sissies playing kickball.

Soccer markets to Nazis - even today. Umbro markets Zyklon, a type of shoe, to soccer participants. Zyklon was the name of the gas used to kill Jews in WWII.

Soccer cheering has no point. Football fans successfully cause opposing teams' offenses to call timeouts, use up the play clock, screw up audibles or cause procedure penalties. Ask Burt Hooton whether baseball fans affect an opponent's performance. Soccer? They sing songs - which all sound the same - regardless of outcome. It doesn't celebrate performance. It doesn't serve to intimidate. It has no purpose.

Simone Poodoin
Jun 26, 2003

Che storia figata, ragazzo!



Holy lmao that cant be real

mackintosh
Aug 18, 2007


Semper Fidelis Poloniae

Drogadon posted:

Holy lmao that cant be real

A piss poor troll attempt tbh, I don't rate it at all.

chuggo is BACK
Jul 1, 2008




"Chuggo"

PWM POTM December 2014

nooo

Mickolution
Oct 1, 2005

Ballers...I put numbers on the boards

Ewar Woowar posted:

Soccer markets to Nazis - even today. Umbro markets Zyklon, a type of shoe, to soccer participants. Zyklon was the name of the gas used to kill Jews in WWII.

I had to look this up and holy poo poo, it's real.

Link

It was 12 years ago, but how on earth did that happen?

chuggo is BACK
Jul 1, 2008




"Chuggo"

PWM POTM December 2014

Mickolution posted:

I had to look this up and holy poo poo, it's real.

Link

It was 12 years ago, but how on earth did that happen?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ChSE7VOk5E

Azerban
Oct 28, 2003



Mickolution posted:

It was 12 years ago, but how on earth did that happen?

Zyklon = Cyclone

Shrapnig
Jan 21, 2005

Azerban posted:

Zyklon = Cyclone

belgend
Mar 6, 2008

me when The Club do another win

wow, that loving ronaldo gif has a watermark now? weve gone far

Shrapnig
Jan 21, 2005

belgend posted:

wow, that loving ronaldo gif has a watermark now? weve gone far

I just image searched it and posted the first one that was small enough to upload from imgur

jesus WEP
Oct 17, 2004


I still like nike's special st patrick's shoes better

franks
Jan 1, 2007

Alcoholism is the only
disease you can get
yelled at for having.

Ewar Woowar posted:

The correct term for 0 is zero, not nil. Take a math class.

Actually, the correct term for 0 is oh. As in: Jozy, from the top of the eighteen, blasts it into the upper ninety, and it's one-oh USA.

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.
Nil by mouth, the touching story of the 6 hours of starvation a desperately ill Jozy had to endure before his operation to remove an ingrown toe nail.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
I'm sorry, the correct term is "bagel", as in the common sporting expression "double bagel".

Babby Thatcher
May 3, 2004

concept by my buddy kyle
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Did_Pele_kill_his_brother

while Pele and his brother were playing the beutiful art of soccer his brother was chosen to become the goalkeeper little did his brother know that Pele 's shots were not to be competed with. as Pele shot the ball at his brother it accidently hit him in the chest he later died.

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Ravel
Dec 23, 2009

There's no story

Babby Thatcher posted:

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Did_Pele_kill_his_brother

while Pele and his brother were playing the beutiful art of soccer his brother was chosen to become the goalkeeper little did his brother know that Pele 's shots were not to be competed with. as Pele shot the ball at his brother it accidently hit him in the chest he later died.

Isn't this the plot of Frozen

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