Idiots on Social Media Thread

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FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

ol qwerty bastard posted:

So these guys have never heard of anti-trust regulations? Cause I'm pretty sure that the government mandating that farmers use only one company's products...

# ? May 12, 2014 19:24

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# ? May 23, 2024 07:50

karl fungus: May 6, 2011; Baeume sind auch Freunde

What sort of lovely business plan involves sterilizing everyone so that nobody eats your product after a couple of generations because they're all dead.

# ? May 12, 2014 19:28

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

karl fungus posted:

What sort of lovely business plan involves sterilizing everyone so that nobody eats your product after a couple of generations because they're all dead.

A right wing one, obviously.

# ? May 12, 2014 19:29

Fur20: Nov 14, 2007; すご▞い！
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね！

More from the desk of Mr. "Spend Money Make Money gently caress YOU PATRIOTS YOU COST ME $1000 YESTERDAY"

It's like, I don't know how you can have gone through college during the economic crash and grown up in Hawaii with its astronomical and unrealistic real estate prices and still get taken by this poo poo. It's safe to invest in property without money!

# ? May 12, 2014 19:32

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

The White Dragon posted:

More from the desk of Mr. "Spend Money Make Money gently caress YOU PATRIOTS YOU COST ME $1000 YESTERDAY"

It's like, I don't know how you can have gone through college during the economic crash and grown up in Hawaii with its astronomical and unrealistic real estate prices and still get taken by this poo poo. It's safe to invest in property without money!

How do I sign up for 145k / year of passive income? Because I think I'd enjoy that.

Does it involve writing books about real estate investments?

# ? May 12, 2014 19:49

Islam is the Lite Rock FM: Jul 27, 2007; by exmarx

FrozenVent posted:

How do I sign up for 145k / year of passive income? Because I think I'd enjoy that.

Does it involve writing books about real estate investments?

I have this investment opportunity for you. For every $1 you give me I'll give you $0.50 back in pure profit.

# ? May 12, 2014 19:51

ElectricBlizzard: Jun 24, 2011; "I never met a monster I didn't like"

Nastyman posted:

# ? May 12, 2014 20:02

of bees: Dec 28, 2009

ElectricBlizzard posted:

Glad to see that someone else has the same level of maturity as me.

# ? May 12, 2014 20:17

casual poster: Jun 29, 2009; So casual.

Effexxor posted:

Aren't people getting a little too old to be using "the dictionary states....." when arguing/writing? I remember using that crap when I was back in HS and still thought of it as a pretty lazy line. I hope I'm not the only one who thinks this.

# ? May 12, 2014 20:56

Arsonist Daria: Feb 27, 2011; ^{Requiescat in pace.}

casual poster posted:

Aren't people getting a little too old to be using "the dictionary states....." when arguing/writing? I remember using that crap when I was back in HS and still thought of it as a pretty lazy line. I hope I'm not the only one who thinks this.

I mean there are times where someone has an outright wrong interpretation of the word but when it comes to rhetoric it's absolutely loving useless. It's really only an argument to be deployed when you're drunk with friends and trying to piss each other off.

# ? May 12, 2014 20:58

RyuujinBlueZ: Oct 9, 2007; WHAT DID YOU DO?!

casual poster posted:

Aren't people getting a little too old to be using "the dictionary states....." when arguing/writing? I remember using that crap when I was back in HS and still thought of it as a pretty lazy line. I hope I'm not the only one who thinks this.

Actually while "the dictionary states" might be a bit stupid it's vitally important in any kind of argument to make sure all parties are using the same definitions for any given term. It isn't strictly wrong to try and come to an agreement on that kind of thing, though a lot of times it ends up just being a smokescreen to throw the argument off and get out of it.

# ? May 12, 2014 21:26

Arsonist Daria: Feb 27, 2011; ^{Requiescat in pace.}

RyuujinBlueZ posted:

Actually while "the dictionary states" might be a bit stupid it's vitally important in any kind of argument to make sure all parties are using the same definitions for any given term. It isn't strictly wrong to try and come to an agreement on that kind of thing, though a lot of times it ends up just being a smokescreen to throw the argument off and get out of it.

Yeah this is true, but for the love of god people should not phrase it as "the dictionary says this." It works far better as a dialog or someone just saying "this is what I mean when I say this, fyi." Breaking out a dictionary definition comes off as massively pedantic which is generally not going to help your case.

# ? May 12, 2014 21:33

Funosaurus: May 28, 2009

God works in mysterious ways, like totally punching out some pussy-rear end aclu bleeding-fart liberal.

# ? May 12, 2014 22:10

Arsonist Daria: Feb 27, 2011; ^{Requiescat in pace.}

The gently caress dude, I thought God was omnipotent?

Also that sounds like a great blow-off class.

# ? May 12, 2014 22:14

Zedd: Jul 6, 2009; I mean, who would have noticed another madman around here?

Beef Jerky Robot posted:

Now I'm just a simple American who doesn't know much about European song contests, but didn't a bunch of monsters win one year? Who cares if a lady with a beard won?

A bit late but Eurovision is something special; educate yourself with the examples:
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3622373

More ontopic: I'm glad I keep a tight leash on my facebook, As Dutch person (we came in 2nd) the most negative thing I've seen is that without the politics we would have won. Everybody agreed it was nice to support a statement though. :3:

# ? May 12, 2014 22:22

Kugyou no Tenshi: Nov 8, 2005; We can't keep the crowd waiting, can we?

Lumberjack Bonanza posted:

Yeah this is true, but for the love of god people should not phrase it as "the dictionary says this." It works far better as a dialog or someone just saying "this is what I mean when I say this, fyi." Breaking out a dictionary definition comes off as massively pedantic which is generally not going to help your case.

Well, when the person is making a definitional argument in the first place ("Bigot is defined as"), pulling the "the dictionary says" argument is saying "no, you idiot, this is an actual definition, and your 'definition' is garbage". Under literally any other circumstances, I agree that it's utter poo poo - I just think in this case it comes across well because it's actually pulling a definition from a source rather than out of one's rear end.

# ? May 12, 2014 22:44

Effexxor: May 26, 2008

Kugyou no Tenshi posted:

Well, when the person is making a definitional argument in the first place ("Bigot is defined as"), pulling the "the dictionary says" argument is saying "no, you idiot, this is an actual definition, and your 'definition' is garbage". Under literally any other circumstances, I agree that it's utter poo poo - I just think in this case it comes across well because it's actually pulling a definition from a source rather than out of one's rear end.

Pretty much. She pretty obviously doesn't actually know what 'bigot' means and is misconstruing it for 'someone who disagrees' and the definition would need to be presented for any argument of substance to make sense.

# ? May 12, 2014 22:54

Arsonist Daria: Feb 27, 2011; ^{Requiescat in pace.}

Kugyou no Tenshi posted:

Well, when the person is making a definitional argument in the first place ("Bigot is defined as"), pulling the "the dictionary says" argument is saying "no, you idiot, this is an actual definition, and your 'definition' is garbage". Under literally any other circumstances, I agree that it's utter poo poo - I just think in this case it comes across well because it's actually pulling a definition from a source rather than out of one's rear end.

Maybe but then you get into the problem of "well MY dictionary says THIS" and also that a dictionary isn't a great tool for discussing the intricacies of how people actually use language. Though ultimately, yeah, that moron needs a refresher on what "bigot" actually means if they think it's "anyone who disagrees with me".

# ? May 12, 2014 22:57

Clockwork Sputnik: Nov 6, 2004; 24 Hour Party Monster

Otana posted:

That wouldn't happen to be Ms. Metal, would it? :tinfoil:

# ? May 12, 2014 23:18

Soviet Commubot: Oct 22, 2008

Funosaurus posted:

God works in mysterious ways, like totally punching out some pussy-rear end aclu bleeding-fart liberal.

There were a couple of good parodies of that floating around in the DnD version of this thread.

quote:

A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx, known atheist

�Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!�

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.

�How old is this rock, pinhead?�

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied �4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian�

�Wrong. It�s been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real� then it should be an animal now�

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears. The same tears liberals cry for the �poor� (who today live in such luxury that most own refrigerators) when they jealously try to claw justly earned wealth from the deserving job creators. There is no doubt that at this point our professor, DeShawn Washington, wished he had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and become more than a sophist liberal professor. He wished so much that he had a gun to shoot himself from embarrassment, but he himself had petitioned against them!

The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named �Small Government� flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.

Semper Fi.
p.s. close the borders

And my personal favorite:

quote:

"A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was a vowed atheist and a member of the ACLU.

One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, �God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I�ll give you exactly 15 minutes.� The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.

Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, �Here I am God. I�m still waiting.� It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and lifted up his arm to strike him.

At that moment the professor was transformed into a 7-foot grizzly, wreathed in a halo of holy fire. The bear spoke: �Blasphemer thou art, thou thinkst to take the place of God? Those who deny me face eternal fire, but you who knows my work and yet commits the sin of Satan I curse a hundred times over!� The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently picking at his boils. Then Richard Dawkins burst into the room, wielding a copy of The Selfish Gene and crying �Leave that boy alone, you pathetic atavism!� As the holy bear whirled around, terrible light flashing in its eyes, Dawkins shed his mortal form, raised each of his seven horned heads, and hissed. �It�ssss me you want!�. And then the Lord and the Antichrist joined in the final battle.

The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence.�

# ? May 12, 2014 23:34

Nightswimming: Aug 13, 2010; It's not like years ago

Not really idiots on social media, as I'm sure this is a joke, but it just made me :monocle:

so hard:

# ? May 12, 2014 23:41

Count Boblo: Nov 3, 2010

A United States Marine was taking college classes between his deployments to Afghanistan.

One of the courses had a professor that was an atheist and a member of the ACLU. One day the professor shocked everyone by walking into class, looking up and stating, "God, if you are real I want you to come down and knock me off this platform. I will give you 15 minutes."

Several minutes tick by in silence, and when the 15 minutes had almost expired, the Marine got up from his seat, approached the professor and punched him in the face, knocking him off the platform and out cold. The Marine simply went back to his seat.

The professor came to, visibly shaken and was about to ask the Marine, "What the heck did you do that for?" but he wasn't able to because the other students in the class had called the police and reported the assault. The Marine had already been arrested and before long he was convicted in trial with the testimony of the numerous witnesses present at the incident. He is currently serving time in county and has earned the nickname "The Gaper" amongst his prison mates.

# ? May 13, 2014 00:42

Mr. Bones: Jan 2, 2011; ain't no law says a skeleton can't play the blues

e: nvm, shitpost

Mr. Bones has a new favorite as of 02:56 on May 13, 2014

# ? May 13, 2014 01:29

Explain How!: Dec 14, 2013

Way to be a heteronormative shithead.

You should probably kill yourself.

# ? May 13, 2014 01:33

Postal Parcel: Aug 2, 2013

Kajeesus posted:

Can we not use that idiot dichotomy about forum posts, particularly outside of D&D? What killed that thread was that a couple MRAs bitched about feminism and the thread devolved into goons making GBS threads their pants at each other instead of posting context.

Sorry, but that was the reason i put it in quotes. I know it was some group of people who 'we'(general forum audience) rail against(impotently argue about).
All I remember is that it ended up being unironic mocking instead of ironic jabbing.

Soviet Commubot posted:

"A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was a vowed atheist and a member of the ACLU.

One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, �God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I�ll give you exactly 15 minutes.� The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.

Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, �Here I am God. I�m still waiting.� It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and lifted up his arm to strike him.

At that moment the professor was transformed into a 7-foot grizzly, wreathed in a halo of holy fire. The bear spoke: �Blasphemer thou art, thou thinkst to take the place of God? Those who deny me face eternal fire, but you who knows my work and yet commits the sin of Satan I curse a hundred times over!� The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently picking at his boils. Then Richard Dawkins burst into the room, wielding a copy of The Selfish Gene and crying �Leave that boy alone, you pathetic atavism!� As the holy bear whirled around, terrible light flashing in its eyes, Dawkins shed his mortal form, raised each of his seven horned heads, and hissed. �It�ssss me you want!�. And then the Lord and the Antichrist joined in the final battle.

The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence.�

And that teacher was Satan incarnate. All hail our dark lord and master.
P.S. We've been going out for 6 years since that day. We're getting married this fall!

# ? May 13, 2014 02:46

Otana: Jun 1, 2005; Let's go see what kind of trouble we can get into.

Clockwork Sputnik posted:

That wouldn't happen to be Ms. Metal, would it?

You are correct, though she mostly just seems a bit bemused by it. The sheer paranoia and comments about "I SHOULD BE ABLE TO FRIEND AS MANY POEPLE AS I WNAT WITHOUT FACEBOOK PUNISHING ME!!!!!" from her friends on the followup post were pretty entertaining though.

Otana has a new favorite as of 03:53 on May 13, 2014

# ? May 13, 2014 03:44

TinTower: Apr 21, 2010; You don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.

# ? May 13, 2014 08:17

Segmentation Fault: Jun 7, 2012

TinTower posted:

That's a parody account. :ssh:

# ? May 13, 2014 08:18

nippythefish: Nov 20, 2007; FEED ME SNAKES

TinTower posted:

# ? May 13, 2014 08:19

Dear Prudence: Sep 3, 2012

So loving stupid. Use patronus instead!

# ? May 13, 2014 09:40

My Lovely Horse: Aug 21, 2010

Surely using "patronus" would be offensive to wizardkin

# ? May 13, 2014 09:55

Fashionable Jorts: Jan 18, 2010; Maybe if I'm busy it could keep me from you

Dear Prudence posted:

So loving stupid. Use patronus instead!

I remember a couple months ago, Wil Wheaton made a "___ is my spirit animal" joke, and Tumblr poo poo itself, and kept trying to make him seem racist, even after it was pointed out that Europeans have had spirit animals as part of their culture for thousands of years. So long before white people even knew Native American's even existed, we had spirit animals, but yet we are appropriating their culture if we say it now.

# ? May 13, 2014 10:35

SurreptitiousMuffin: Mar 21, 2010

TinTower posted:

In Shakira Law, all lawyers are hip because hips don't lie.

# ? May 13, 2014 11:08

Clockwork Sputnik: Nov 6, 2004; 24 Hour Party Monster

Otana posted:

You are correct, though she mostly just seems a bit bemused by it. The sheer paranoia and comments about "I SHOULD BE ABLE TO FRIEND AS MANY POEPLE AS I WNAT WITHOUT FACEBOOK PUNISHING ME!!!!!" from her friends on the followup post were pretty entertaining though.

Of course, given that she runs 2 maxed out personal accounts. I've advised her against exactly that (advising instead to switch to a professional account), and I agree with your assessment of her Facebook stance.

A friend of Ms. Metal is a friend of mine.

Just saying it's a small world, is all :-)

And if you're ever in North Hollywood, look me up at my bar, The Other Door! Goons get their first drink on me.

Cheers.

# ? May 13, 2014 12:29

Takoluka: Jun 26, 2009; Don't look at me!

Dear Prudence posted:

So loving stupid. Use patronus instead!

I want a tumblr thread again so badly, because I need more of this. Someone I know has jumped hard on the social justice train, and it's infuriating. Everyone in these circles is so hellbent on individuality via special snowflake labels. The Greendale Human Being is true to life, and that's really depressing.

# ? May 13, 2014 13:28

DJ Fuckboy Supreme: Feb 10, 2011; And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

Every post is like that though, an insipid homily of people trying to be more outraged and progressive. Listening to their circlejerk is as bad as our own, imo

# ? May 13, 2014 15:18

Flaggy: Jul 6, 2007; Grandpa Cthulu needs his napping chair; Grimey Drawer

At least some of the people are trying to bring reason into it.

# ? May 13, 2014 16:38

Takoluka: Jun 26, 2009; Don't look at me!

Whoa, dude, that's Old Testament. That doesn't matter! *quotes Leviticus*

# ? May 13, 2014 16:48

1stGear: Jan 16, 2010; Here's to the new us.

The correct answer whenever someone tries to use the Bible (or any religious text) to criticize secular organizations or policy is "I don't give a gently caress."

# ? May 13, 2014 16:57

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# ? May 23, 2024 07:50

Mineaiki: Nov 20, 2013

NotAnArtist posted:

Every post is like that though, an insipid homily of people trying to be more outraged and progressive. Listening to their circlejerk is as bad as our own, imo

Shaming is a pretty effective tactic for achieving social justice. The idea that shaming tactics should be used a lot is really dragging social justice down though, and not just on tumblr. The internet destroyed the barrier to entry for social justice advocates, and also softened the blowback received for mouthing off to the wrong people or saying something dumb, so the level of discourse has been brought down pretty significantly. Now you just have a lot of people who find nothing more pleasurable than tearing each other down viciously for minor, innocent infractions. Crabs in a bucket.

# ? May 13, 2014 17:34

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