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waffle posted:Why would you do this rather than discussing with your wife about having shared goals and then creating a budget together. Actually I told her I was going to set one up and she felt exactly what you said, that I was trying to go behind her back. We had a discussion about it and she got really upset about it because she felt that I was looking at the money because I didn't trust her and that I get mad at her for her budgeting. its really not that, I'm just upset that we have no money  Not directly at her but she felt that way.So yeah, we're budgeting together but now we both feel like crap.
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Jun 6, 2014 04:23
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v "I don't know why she got so mad at me when I just wanted to use our two budgets to come up with a new one together!"
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waffle posted:You are choosing the way most likely to end up in an argument. ^This. Don't set up your own budget. All it's going to do is waste time and start a fight. Get her on board with doing a budget together. Start with absolutes: monthly income, monthly bills, outstanding debts. Work your way up from there together.
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Jun 6, 2014 04:26
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For the love of God, set up your own thread and stop making GBS threads up this one. For content: My cousin (posted about earlier in this thread) recently got a job as a part-time line cook. Good, right? Too bad all the money is going to dice and D&D figurines. On a positive note, I recently found out that his 6 years of on-again-off-again tuition has at least been close to free, thanks to his mother being a pharmacist for the state school system. 
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Jun 6, 2014 04:40
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SiGmA_X posted:I'd be reminding her who pay's for weddings. The woman's family. And what type of person works as a part time mechanic who isn't in school full time? WTF? Oh, the type that knocks up some girl and then gets married to her immediately.... Eh, my hypothetical future daughter will be told that she can get just as married at the county courthouse.
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Jun 6, 2014 04:57
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Jastiger posted:Actually I told her I was going to set one up and she felt exactly what you said, that I was trying to go behind her back. We had a discussion about it and she got really upset about it because she felt that I was looking at the money because I didn't trust her and that I get mad at her for her budgeting. its really not that, I'm just upset that we have no money You say this, but do you think maaaaybe a small part of you blames the person in charge of your finances? You should start a new thread.
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Jun 6, 2014 05:08
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I swear to god if I hear any more about jastiger's dysfunctional loving marriage I'm going to have a goddamn meltdown
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Jun 6, 2014 05:16
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Not a Children posted:For the love of God, set up your own thread and stop making GBS threads up this one. This makes me think of the movie Zero Charisma, which is basically the neckbeard version of Taxi Driver.
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Jun 6, 2014 05:52
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My parents and their divorce are fit for this thread. Some background : father gets out of the military at 23, without much education, marries my mother. After a string of poo poo jobs, works hard enough to get hired as a coder for a french IT company. Bootstraps his way up the food chain and ends up as a senior IT manager in Switzerland for a major corporation, massively overworked but with monthly earnings above 8k euros. Never looked at a bank statement in his life, hardly ever got involved in household finances, let my mother handle everything from bills to taxes. They were living kind of expensively, but well within their means as far as I could tell. It all fell apart when my father reconnected on Facebook with the hot chick he dumped when he enlisted, decided they were still in love, immediately leaves my mother, and the 150k house they were in the process of selling, expecting to retire comfortably with his share of the house sale and his Swiss pension. This is where he finds out that he is more than a 100k euros in debt. He had no idea that comprehensive house renovations, vacations, flavor of the month hobbies, my sister's working holiday in Australia were paid with loans and revolving credits. He apparently wouldn't believe my mother saying they couldn't afford all that poo poo and she took all these loans to pay for it. That's the point he decides, gently caress it, not his problem, decides to ignore the french equivalent of the IRS and not pay his taxes, leave his high-paying job and run off with his new girlfriend. They are now divorced, and have nothing to their names. It blows my loving mind.
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Jun 6, 2014 12:17
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NancyPants posted:I swear to god if I hear any more about jastiger's dysfunctional loving marriage I'm going to have a goddamn meltdown SO my wife and I................... Nah I think we have it worked out now. Content: I routinely see and hear folks that have a Costco/Sams Club membership and then buy tons of everything there because "it must be cheaper its in bulk and at Costco/Sams Club!". Not always the case! Often times yes, and especially when its on sale, but come on buddy, you never used to eat organic tofu for lunch or drank fair trade coffee by the gallon and you still haven't. Just because its there doesn't mean you need to buy a ton of it that'll probably go bad before you even get half way through it.
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Jun 6, 2014 15:16
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Jastiger posted:SO my wife and I................... I worked at a BJs and this is definitely true, but it's true anywhere. You can do very well in those stores if you know what's cheaper, and what prices are elsewhere. Another thing to watch out for in these stores is that many of them don't have selection for certain items. My BJ's only carries Barilla pasta. Even at wholesale club prices it's at best the same price as the store brand, and you have to buy 8, and you don't get to choose which ones you get. BJs does take manufacturer's coupons though and you can do well with stacking there, unless things have changed the register is fairly dumb and the coupon policy was fairly liberal since you're buying 8 of the drat pastas.
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Jun 6, 2014 16:02
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Jastiger posted:Content: I routinely see and hear folks that have a Costco/Sams Club membership and then buy tons of everything there because "it must be cheaper its in bulk and at Costco/Sams Club!". Not always the case! Often times yes, and especially when its on sale, but come on buddy, you never used to eat organic tofu for lunch or drank fair trade coffee by the gallon and you still haven't. Just because its there doesn't mean you need to buy a ton of it that'll probably go bad before you even get half way through it. Dijkstra posted:I know a young lady who is married, both she and her husband have shiny newish SUVs, they have a kid, dog, go on crazy trips to weddings in Napa California etc. They both have MBAs from one of the top schools, wear all the nice clothes etc. etc. They spend a fortune keeping up with their friends from college/grad school but their dirty secret is that they are loving slaves to debt. The worst part is their attitudes towards making changes to personal budgeting. You can suggest changes that'd really help out their situation, but they always blow you off like you're the dummy. And long term savings isn't even something they'll look at. They're all relying on real estate (almost always their primary home) to fund their retirement. Don't know how they'll pull that off- you've got to live somewhere. Us Canadians are specially bad when it comes to debt. melon cat fucked around with this message at 16:21 on Jun 6, 2014 |
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Jun 6, 2014 16:11
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Their prices (at least where I live) are very competitive on things like olive oil, bulk coffee, and paper products. Like everything else you have to judge it on a product by product basis at your local store.Ayn Marx posted:My parents and their divorce are fit for this thread... drat, sorry to hear that.
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Jun 6, 2014 16:16
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I'm going to share a story about Alex, the man who single handedly convinced me to max my retirement accounts. Alex is a 68 year old signal processing engineer. He was my assigned mentor when I started my new job. The field of signal processing used to be guys literally writing equations and figuring stuff out, but is now mostly writing software. Alex is a math genius, and knows the theory at an incredibly deep level. However, he never took to software and now had a hard time staying relevant. My first assignment was to write a large software package for a signal processing simulation. It was a one year task in a closed lab with no windows (poo poo job). I slogged through the work because I had little choice being the new guy. Alex however would literally show up and complain all day long. He did absolutely nothing for an entire year except bitch about how horrible this job was. He told me that he had just got serious about saving over the last four years. In fact, he proudly exclaimed, he had doubled his retirement balance in only four years! He only had savings in his 401k (no ira or taxable). Consider the max one can contribute to a 401k over four years is <100k. I deduced his current balance to be less than 250k after matching and gains. He is 68 years old and had never been married. No kids. He makes senior engineer pay. I have no clue where it all goes. If he was better at saving money then he could quit the job he hates so much, but he is trapped. Save while you're young kids.
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Jun 6, 2014 17:02
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The stock market has nearly doubled in the past 5 years so all he really had to do was contribute the minimum. Jastiger posted:SO my wife and I................... I guarantee whatever problems you have were not worked out in one conversation. Do your budgets together.
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Jun 6, 2014 17:33
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As LLCoolJD said, Costco IS cheaper on things like daipers, toilet paper, olive oil, and stuff like that. Things that are generally long lasting or repetitive use are good deals there. A big jug of laundry soap. Taco seasoning. Bulk chicken breast or shredded cheese. Where they DO get you is on quick consume items like some of their bakery items. As mentioned, the quality of Costco's stuff is absolutely there. Its usually good stuff that you get. The difference is that if you always think its cheaper its not. You gotta be strategic about it. My wife and I only buy diapers when they are on sale there which makes them SUPER cheap for as much as we use them, something like %20 off an already cheaper bulk price. You can tell what was on sale by what our diet is for a few weeks, heh. MrKatharsis posted:The stock market has nearly doubled in the past 5 years so all he really had to do was contribute the minimum. We did. As mentioned I think I'm more upset that we're barely making it than I am at her budgeting.
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Jun 6, 2014 18:02
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I've posted about my sister and her boyfriend before in this thread, but I have more to contribute. She sold her condo after much convincing from me (she was previously trying to rent out the condo in a city an hour away while renting here, and while she couldn't afford both her mortgage (still has PMI!) and rent in a single month--literally could not pay both, so if her renters dipped she would have to take out a 401k loan (on her piddly $20k retirement savings, no efund whatsoever)). She made a great profit, as she bought in a good market at the bottom of the recession. Less than 6 months later, all the money is gone. She did pay off her and her boyfriend's credit cards, and her two car loans (she bought her boyfriend a truck), but she has blown 30k+ on clothes, shoes, wine, furniture (including an $800 bean bag chair!), booze and vacations. None of it went to boost her pretty scant retirement fund, nor did she put it away for a down payment on a new place. She wants a 2-bedroom in our city, where a decent one is 400-500k. She really wants to buy a new house in the next couple years, and I've convinced her it's worth it to save up 20% + closing costs, but she says it'll take her 10 years to save that much. She gave me a look at her budget, and two line items stood out--$1000/mo on groceries and $1600/mo spending money. She says they can only manage to save ~$900/mo. And her new job doesn't offer a 401k so she's "just not gonna contribute for awhile." And this is while her boyfriend has work. He works for a fairly unreliable contractor who makes enough money off his side business  and his wife's work that he doesn't really care too much about keeping his one employee busy. Right now he has full time work because they got a contract for some new development from a friend of theirs. They have a few more months but then it's probably back to the boyfriend getting ~10-20 hours a week. I don't even know what to say anymore. Her boyfriend (who she hopes to marry) has absolutely ruined credit and no retirement savings (he cashed it out during the recession because "it was losing so much money!" The 9k he got from that went to guns, knives, and backpacking gear. Not to the truck loan he was desperately behind & underwater on. They also don't want to save an emergency fund, because then it will take them longer to save the down payment on the new house.
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Jun 6, 2014 19:52
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So now I'm wondering, is there a difference between PMI and the mortgage company paying for your homeowners insurance?
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Jun 6, 2014 20:22
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Wickerman posted:So now I'm wondering, is there a difference between PMI and the mortgage company paying for your homeowners insurance? Yes, one is called PMI and one is called MI. MI is usually bought as a pool (as in all loans with a certain LTV band are covered for the a certain amount under the same policy). They are both insurance against default. EDIT: You may be talking about property insurance which is a totally different thing from PMI/MI.
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Jun 6, 2014 20:24
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Wickerman posted:So now I'm wondering, is there a difference between PMI and the mortgage company paying for your homeowners insurance? Indeed its to protect the bank from you defaulting on the loan. PMI is when you don't have a sufficient amount for a down payment, so the bank is taking on extra risk by financing so much of the home. VA loans (woot woot!) don't need PMI! Having the mortgage company pay for your insurance is a bit different. Often times your insurance will be escrowed into your mortgage payment so that isn't a big deal, its just a way to pay it monthly. When the company is actively paying for it they are going to charge you interest on it and its going to be what is called a "forced placed policy". This means you dropped your coverage, the company dropped you, or for whatever reason you did not adequately insure your home for what the mortgage company wanted. This type of forced coverage is often high cost (plus interest!) and only covers certain things for the bank-NOT the home owner! You never want forced placed insurance.
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Jun 6, 2014 20:50
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DJCobol posted:Dumb people, thats who. Very dumb people. EugeneJ posted:My cousin and her husband pretty much told the girl to gently caress off Powerlurker posted:Eh, my hypothetical future daughter will be told that she can get just as married at the county courthouse.  Jastiger posted:SO my wife and I...................
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Jun 7, 2014 00:20
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Jastiger posted:Having the mortgage company pay for your insurance is a bit different. Often times your insurance will be escrowed into your mortgage payment so that isn't a big deal, its just a way to pay it monthly. Okay, so escrow is what I'm talking about. So for instance, Progressive has a paid-in-full discount for the entire years worth of premiums, is there any way to make this work if the bank wants to hold the payments in escrow?
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Jun 7, 2014 02:38
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It's me, I'm the bad with money. I got a bill from AAA for my home insurance and paid it and set it to autopay thinking it was weird I don't have it already set to autopay. Then I get the reminder from my escrow company they are the ones who pay that. RIGHT. So that's why I get checks at the end of the year for thousands of dollars. Because I double pay all my most expensive expenses. bof.
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Jun 7, 2014 03:03
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moana posted:It's me, I'm the bad with money.
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Jun 7, 2014 04:42
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I just did it with my property taxes, and now AGAIN with my insurance. This is ridiculous and it messes up my mint accounting since I forget to mark the ATM deposit as such. I need someone to smack me. Actually no, I need to sell my house.
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Jun 7, 2014 06:13
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I paid inhabitant taxes I wasn't supposed to for my first year in Japan (exempt from them by treaty as an American, either my employer or the city hosed up, I just assumed I was supposed to pay it and got reimbursed). Decided to look into it as I'm leaving soon, and the city refunded all of it (just a few hundred bucks, though it would have gone up to like $1800 my second year had I continued paying it), plus chucked in another 3% as interest. 
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Jun 7, 2014 09:09
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Trilineatus posted:That does seem pretty bad with money, invasions ain't cheap son.
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Jun 7, 2014 12:25
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Was it in this thread I posted about folks being bad with money? Well in any case, I just spoke with a lady that actually clicked on one of those "10 secrets THEY don't want you to know!" and it gave her my phone number. I'm both ashamed (for my company) and awed that this happened.
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Jun 7, 2014 14:33
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I had a credit card and I owed money on it and never paid because I was a dumb 18 year old. It was like $800 max and when I went to check my credit report to figure out what was going on, I didn't see it on there. Just my usual bills. It has been like 7 years since then. I am bad and dumb but I wanted to pay it and fix that but I cant even figure out who has the loan since it went to collections and its not on there.
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Jun 9, 2014 00:01
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Stealthgerbil posted:I had a credit card and I owed money on it and never paid because I was a dumb 18 year old. It was like $800 max and when I went to check my credit report to figure out what was going on, I didn't see it on there. Just my usual bills. It has been like 7 years since then. I am bad and dumb but I wanted to pay it and fix that but I cant even figure out who has the loan since it went to collections and its not on there. If it isn't on your credit report, then pretend it never existed. Whoever held the debt has long since written it off or sold it to debt collectors, trying to dig it up now could only hurt your credit score.
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Jun 9, 2014 00:11
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Okay. I've just binged through this thread and loved every minute of it. And boy, do I have some stories. For the first one, I work for a loan servicer and deal with people who can't pay their loans. A lot of the time, it's pretty understandable that someone who's making $7.50 an hour can't make a $300/month payment but a lot of the time I'll talk to somone making way more than I do who can't make a payment, and that's annoying. My friend had the best example of this. He was talking to a woman with about a 1.2k/month payment. Her postponement time was maxed out, so he decided to look into need based postponement. So he asked her about her gross monthly income. 40k. But it's really common for people to give us their gross yearly income instead of the monthly, so he asked again. 40k. This woman was making 40k a MONTH and couldn't afford a payment that was 3% of her gross monthly income and had never made a payment. And apparently she was retiring soon. How do you piss away that much money a month? Even after taxes, that is a massive amount of money to piss away each month. And on the other hand, I have some family members that also belong in this thread. They have 4 children, the wife doesn't work, because how can you when you have 4 kids where the oldest is 5, and the dad works 4 jobs to try and keep it all going. To his credit, he is working his rear end off and it's pretty commendable, even though I have no idea when he sleeps. But man, I don't know how they're doing it. She's really big into organic food and all of that stuff and her kids always have fancy snacks from Trader Joe's. But hey, there's some money savvyvess, she gave birth to the latest three kids in her bathtub instead of in a hospital! Granted, that's totally illegal in our state and she also didn't get blood tests or even an ultrasound before the kids were born, but hey, think of the savings! Edit: Oh, and she eats her placenta, which really must help with the food budget. Effexxor fucked around with this message at 16:19 on Jun 9, 2014 |
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Jun 9, 2014 16:08
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Effexxor posted:And on the other hand, I have some family members that also belong in this thread. They have 4 children, the wife doesn't work, because how can you when you have 4 kids where the oldest is 5, and the dad works 4 jobs to try and keep it all going. To his credit, he is working his rear end off and it's pretty commendable, even though I have no idea when he sleeps. But man, I don't know how they're doing it. She's really big into organic food and all of that stuff and her kids always have fancy snacks from Trader Joe's. But hey, there's some money savvyvess, she gave birth to the latest three kids in her bathtub instead of in a hospital! Granted, that's totally illegal in our state and she also didn't get blood tests or even an ultrasound before the kids were born, but hey, think of the savings! Never let them watch "extreme cheapskates". It is a stupid TLC show that was on Netflix. One of the moms has her entire family use reusable toilet paper. Little squares of fabric go into a bin next to the toilet once coated with turds. It's like what they do in areas where the plumbing can't handle toilet paper, except the poopy mass of fabric goes in the washing machine for reuse. 
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Jun 9, 2014 17:47
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As gross as I think that is, too, people use reusable diapers all the time with babies and that's pretty much the same thing.
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Jun 9, 2014 19:45
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It came from A/T:Xibanya posted:I had a gold's gym membership that was being autodebited to my debit card.
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Jun 9, 2014 19:48
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My wife and I were driving around yesterday and decided to stop at Big Lots. They have furniture in this store and I was looking at the financing poster board they had up. For every $1000 borrowed, you can make 52 weekly payments of around $44, or 27 bi-weekly payments of around $78. This works out to For the privilege of getting your Big Lots furniture you pay around 100% APR financing. I have been very happy with the sectional we bought from Big Lots over 4 years ago, but I wouldn't have paid double for it. How this is legal in my state, I have no idea.
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Jun 9, 2014 22:00
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FrozenVent posted:It came from A/T: I get the mail part being dumb, but I don't see how you'd be to collections for someone being unable to charge you, unless you are tied to a contract.
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Jun 9, 2014 22:12
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Yeah, gym memberships are usually contracts paid by installment.
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Jun 9, 2014 22:16
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In a much happier version of these stories, today I was bad with money; while cycling around, I stopped and bought lemonade from two small children. $0.50 for a couple ounces of sugar water. Edit: It was worth it. Fell Fire fucked around with this message at 00:44 on Jun 10, 2014 |
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Jun 10, 2014 00:17
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Think about all the compounding interest you're going to be missing out on!
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Jun 10, 2014 03:31
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Thank you reddit... http://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/27r1o6/won_the_lottery_about_342k_after_taxes_i_have/ Won $342,000 from lottery, paid off all debt, went on a spending spree, now has $100,000 left in cash and is considering buying a boat. Spermy Smurf fucked around with this message at 18:14 on Jun 10, 2014 |
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Jun 10, 2014 18:04
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Spermy Smurf posted:Thank you reddit... http://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/27r1o6/won_the_lottery_about_342k_after_taxes_i_have/ 149k of that was to pay off his mortgage, which at 27 puts him in a pretty enviable position. Even if they did blow 100k, they still have 100k to go and he seems to at least be receptive to advice... I don't think he's seriously considering buying a boat, and even if he was, "boat" covers a wide range. Having only 10k in retirement savings at 27, though... Yeah.
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Jun 10, 2014 18:13
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