More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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ZetsurinPower: Dec 14, 2003; I looooove leftovers!

Inspector_666 posted:

Are you a Bell?!

I don't understand the question

# ? Jun 11, 2014 19:46

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# ? May 10, 2024 09:30

sfwarlock: Aug 11, 2007

Pissing me off today: case-sensitive usernames. Why would you ever allow there to be two separate accounts distinguished only by capitalization??

# ? Jun 11, 2014 22:05

meanieface: Mar 27, 2012; During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.

Pissing me off: boss showing up at my desk and being super-weird about how I needed to log out RIGHT NOW so she could walk me out the door.

Not pissing me off: :yotj:

# ? Jun 11, 2014 23:03

GOOCHY: Sep 17, 2003; In an interstellar burst I'm back to save the universe!

meanieface posted:

Pissing me off: boss showing up at my desk and being super-weird about how I needed to log out RIGHT NOW so she could walk me out the door.

Not pissing me off:

Story time!

# ? Jun 11, 2014 23:04

Che Delilas: Nov 23, 2009; FREE TIBET WEED

ZetsurinPower posted:

I don't understand the question

Probably a reference to the infamous Rogue Brewery and its job posting, both of which can only be described as "ridiculous."

http://www.rogue.com/roguenation/?articleId=2491

Are you a Rogue?

# ? Jun 11, 2014 23:14

FlapYoJacks: Feb 12, 2009

Bob Morales posted:

We're still going to use Paychex, just not the timeclock portion.

Here's what the new program looks like

The instruction book has screenshots from Windows 98

Tell them about http://www.tsheets.com/

# ? Jun 11, 2014 23:15

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Che Delilas posted:

Probably a reference to the infamous Rogue Brewery and its job posting, both of which can only be described as "ridiculous."

http://www.rogue.com/roguenation/?articleId=2491

Are you a Rogue?

That's what I was aiming for.

# ? Jun 11, 2014 23:37

Sonic Dude: May 6, 2009

ratbert90 posted:

Tell them about http://www.tsheets.com/

Tsheets is somehow not the worst out there. It's amazing how many tools can't simultaneously handle weekly overtime and semimonthly pay periods.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 00:00

God of Mischief: Oct 22, 2010

Pissing me off: vendor test sandboxes.

Seriously, if the vendor gives out test "accounts" to trigger specific conditions (rejected, failure, etc.), you would think that they would work more often than "randomly." Attempting to use these accounts should actually do what they are documented to do! Why is one account case sensitive on a single field when none of the fields or accounts are?!

It would also help if the test sandboxes had uptime high enough so that developers could actually, you know, test stuff through them reliably.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 00:57

Moey: Oct 22, 2010; I LIKE TO MOVE IT

Inspector_666 posted:

That's what I was aiming for.

I wonder what poor schmuck took that job.

It would be a great resume booster for get out of help desk though.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 01:01

meanieface: Mar 27, 2012; During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.

GOOCHY posted:

Story time!

Today was the last day of my two week notice.

I'm starting new job Monday, I'll be doing ETL all day! I am super excited.

Hit me up on irc sometime if you want tear-inducing stories of the place I'm leaving. I'm so very glad to be going.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 01:08

Stanos: Sep 22, 2009; The best 57 in hockey.

To give that job opening credit, at least they're honest. I mean everyone's who has looked for an IT job has seen those 'IT/Computer Jesus' jobs that pay horrible. It's just like the Penny Arcade one, except instead of getting some webcomic nerd to do everything and work for peanuts it's a beer nerd.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 01:45

Galler: Jan 28, 2008

At least there would be a shitload of free and pretty ok beer to make things better.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 02:33

Sirotan: Oct 17, 2006; Sirotan is a seal.

Galler posted:

At least there would be a shitload of free and pretty ok beer to make things better.

There is nothing pretty ok about this beer (or any Rogue beers, to be honest). If someone offers you this beer for free, politely turn them down. If you see it in a store, do not be tempted by its Pepto-Bismol colored label.

Rogue beer: not even once.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 02:51

evol262: Nov 30, 2010; #!/usr/bin/perl

Galler posted:

At least there would be a shitload of free and pretty ok beer to make things better.

Rogue's management has a reputation for firing people at company wide meetings like they're cast members on Entourage or something.

Dead Guy is a good beer. But gently caress Rogue, do not buy their products.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 02:53

J: Jun 10, 2001

Do they just have a revolving door of sucker beer nerds working that job or what? They don't want to pay 50k, yet how much are they losing by cheaping out on IT? And I'm not at all familiar with the cost of living in Portland but if I had to guess, 50k would be not very good, nevermind what they are actually paying which is most likely well below that.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 02:56

Partycat: Oct 25, 2004

Bacon maple ale... Wonder if it tastes better on the way out, maybe after running it through that water world piss machine.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 02:57

Stanos: Sep 22, 2009; The best 57 in hockey.

Before I noticed the pigs in the background it almost looked like the guy was really angry about grabbing a turd.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 03:08

kensei: Dec 27, 2007; He has come home, where he belongs. The Ancient Mariner returns to lead his first team to glory, forever and ever. Amen!

Moey posted:

I wonder what poor schmuck took that job.

It would be a great resume booster for get out of help desk though.

The person working there now is a goon :ssh:

Fake edit: not me

# ? Jun 12, 2014 03:51

Che Delilas: Nov 23, 2009; FREE TIBET WEED

kensei posted:

The person working there now is a goon

Fake edit: not me

Considering the depth of some of the wells certain goons have called their home, this does not particularly surprise me.

J posted:

Do they just have a revolving door of sucker beer nerds working that job or what?

I imagine they get the same type of people as those who work for Penny Arcade (also has infamous job posting). Credulous youngsters who buy all the bullshit those companies are shoveling. It's possible that they actually enjoy the work, until they burn out of the whole industry in a couple years from the stress inherent in being the only point of failure for a non-trivially sized organization.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 04:23

stubblyhead: Sep 13, 2007; That is treason, Johnny!; Fun Shoe

kensei posted:

The person working there now is a goon

Fake edit: not me

What? Dish.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 04:24

kensei: Dec 27, 2007; He has come home, where he belongs. The Ancient Mariner returns to lead his first team to glory, forever and ever. Amen!

stubblyhead posted:

What? Dish.

It's someone that idles in #oregoons sometimes, I don't know him so I have no stories.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 04:38

Sirotan: Oct 17, 2006; Sirotan is a seal.

Che Delilas posted:

I imagine they get the same type of people as those who work for Penny Arcade (also has infamous job posting). Credulous youngsters who buy all the bullshit those companies are shoveling. It's possible that they actually enjoy the work, until they burn out of the whole industry in a couple years from the stress inherent in being the only point of failure for a non-trivially sized organization.

quote:

There's been a lot of talk about Rogue Ales and its business practices over the past year or two. I worked in their corporate office for a short time and so I'd like to give a brief description of my experience there.
A little over two years ago, I was laid off and in need of work. My previous job was okay, but I didn't love it and wanted to do something that I'd find personally fulfilling. I've always loved beer and the idea of the craft brewing industry, so I sent out a few e-mails to local breweries to see if they could use someone like me. About a week later, I got a call at 9:30 PM from an old man named Jack Joyce. He introduced himself as the founder and owner of Rogue Ales (a brewery which, at the time, I naively loved) and said he needed about 30 minutes to chat. I was a little starstruck so of course I took his call. I won't go into every detail of the call, but the gist of it was this: "we don't hire recent college graduates because they haven't demonstrated any real work ethic yet." He proceeded to tell me how lazy I am and how I'd never make it at his company, but that he'd be willing to give me a shot. He said that his employees get Christmas and Thanksgiving off work, but that was it - in his own words, "Americans don't work hard enough anyway." This was a little concerning, but considering I was getting a call to work in an industry I really admired from something of an industry leader, and the fact that I was broke, I accepted his offer then and there.
I began working a few days later. I walked into the office and expected to find Jack, as I would be working with him directly as an "office ninja" (what they call new hires). Turns out, he was in Hawaii and I would be training with other people. My mentor (while Jack was gone) was someone Jack referred to as an "East Coast Jew". Basically, I was given a stack of binders and told to read through them, several times, as this would be my training. So I read them, over and over again. One entire binder was dedicated to the things that you shouldn't say around Jack - words like "new normal", "game changer", "paradigm", etc.. If you did say them around him, you'd be punished. Seriously.
So after I had read all the training manuals about 4 times each, my job was to use a clipping service to find any and all mentions of Rogue in print or e-media. Rogue doesn't have a dedicated PR department, nor do they do any real marketing - they allow the brand to speak for itself. That sounds noble and all, but the reality is, they're more dedicated to selling their brand than they are making good beer. When it comes right down to it, John Maier has full control over the brewing process, but the Joyce's (Jack and his son Brett [not short for Brettanomyces]) decide which beers will go to market; in short, they decide what is worth selling. Anyway, my job focused on finding those mentions in the media and relaying that to others so they could leverage those mentions.
So what was so bad about Rogue? The way they treat their employees is absolute garbage. I can't remember all the **** I put up with that came directly from Jack (over the phone and through e-mails, mind you) but it was awful. I was commuting 45 miles to work and showed up 3 minutes late one day due to a wreck (I was normally 15-20 minutes early). Rather than confront me personally, Brett Joyce (whose desk is set up in the middle of the office so he can personally oversee everyone) sent an e-mail to another employee stating "[Insert her name], can you ask mattsesar why he was late today?". This would have been embarrassing enough, but he CC'd THE ENTIRE COMPANY. Everyone with a Rogue e-mail address. So her e-mail to me also CC'd everyone. I had to reply with my reason. Well, turns out that for Brett, 3 minutes was just too much and my reason (which he called an excuse) warranted a public apology and an explanation of the steps I'd take to prevent it from happening in the future. So I had to apologize to the entire company for being 3 minutes late. After that, my incident was placed in one of the binders I had to read so that new hires, from then through now and into the future, would all read about how mattsesar was 3 minutes late to work one day.
That's just one small example. Public humiliation was commonplace; the less time you'd spent there, the more you were subjected to it. Hazing is one thing, but this was outright harassment.
Another example was when I took the company van to deliver mail to the downtown pub. I was supposed to shadow one of the higher-ups, a woman who sorts Jack's e-mails for him. She's been there for decades so she's basically a queen. I showed up, started to take notes, and she asked me why I didn't have my clipboard with me. I was confused, told her I didn't know anything about a clipboard. She LOST HER **** and told me I was worthless, that I'd never survive there, because I didn't know about the clipboard. I explained that I was never told about the clipboard and never saw anything about it in any of the 10 or so binders I had to read. Her response: "That's the problem with you - you just assumed you didn't need to ask about it."
A few days later, I had an emergency with a family member (she had to be taken to the emergency room via ambulance and I was the closest one to her.) I got the phone call, told someone that I had an emergency and had to leave, and left at ~2:00 PM. I ended up getting there before the ambulance, but that's not important. Anyway, the next day I got another e-mail from Brett Joyce and a call from his father asking what the hell happened and demanded to know why I left work early. I told them it was a medical emergency, but that didn't satisfy them. I was told to write another letter of apology to the rest of the company - at which point I said "**** you" to Brett and walked out.
I called Jack Joyce and told him exactly what I thought of his operation - that they make decent beer, but as a business, they're probably one of the worst I've ever seen. They can make money and grow a business, but they don't know how to operate a team. I told him thanks for the opportunity, but I wasn't willing to subject myself to daily harassment and abuse for a paycheck. This was the only time that Jack had anything remotely like respect for me. I think he isn't used to people standing up to him, so when someone did, it took him by surprise.
Anyway, I haven't bought a single bottle of Rogue since then. There are plenty of other breweries to choose from that offer better beer for better prices. I try to tell as many people as I can about Rogue because I find them so distasteful. If the Joyce's were to leave and John Maier were to take over, I think it'd be a different story, but as it stands now, those two ruin the company for me.

Quote courtesy of the beer thread, as the reddit poster has since edited it out from http://www.reddit.com/r/beer/comments/1fql1b/the_short_time_i_spent_working_for_rogue_ales_in/

tl;dr: Don't buy Rogue beer.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 04:44

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Sirotan posted:

tl;dr: Don't buy Rogue beer.

Which should be really easy since their beer is terrible anyway!

# ? Jun 12, 2014 05:04

kensei: Dec 27, 2007; He has come home, where he belongs. The Ancient Mariner returns to lead his first team to glory, forever and ever. Amen!

Sirotan posted:

Quote courtesy of the beer thread, as the reddit poster has since edited it out from http://www.reddit.com/r/beer/comments/1fql1b/the_short_time_i_spent_working_for_rogue_ales_in/

tl;dr: Don't buy Rogue beer.

Holy poo poo

# ? Jun 12, 2014 05:09

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

kensei posted:

It's someone that idles in #oregoons sometimes, I don't know him so I have no stories.

So you've narrowed it down to about two dozen people.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 05:11

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

Sirotan posted:

It's a neat looking bottle to put on a shelf of neat looking bottles, but it tasted awful.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 05:22

FlapYoJacks: Feb 12, 2009

Sonic Dude posted:

Tsheets is somehow not the worst out there. It's amazing how many tools can't simultaneously handle weekly overtime and semimonthly pay periods.

I'm saying it's good. My friend co-founded it. :v:

# ? Jun 12, 2014 05:49

CitizenKain: May 27, 2001; That was Gary Cooper, asshole.; Nap Ghost

Why is communication so loving difficult for my boss. He seems to carry on conversations in his head with us where he goes over what he wants, gives us some vague hint at what he wants and then wanders away. When things don't happen like he expects, he gets pissy and explains that he told us what he wants and we just didn't listen.

So, couple of weeks ago, he has me mock up a thing in Visio from a drawing he has on his desk. I throw it together really quick and then hit the road to work on a project. Today he comes by and asks why I didn't finish the drawing, as he asked me to not only do the drawing, but trace the cables to where they end up. I head in, trace a bunch, add them to a diagram and hand it back. He asks why I didn't follow the connections to the network taps and trace them from there. I'm sure in his head, he explained what he wanted to me, but goddamn I wish he'd relay that to the real me.

However, nowhere near as bad as Rogue at least.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 05:49

ZetsurinPower: Dec 14, 2003; I looooove leftovers!

Che Delilas posted:

Probably a reference to the infamous Rogue Brewery and its job posting, both of which can only be described as "ridiculous."

http://www.rogue.com/roguenation/?articleId=2491

Are you a Rogue?

dear god that whole thing makes me cringe...how low is the loving bar at that place for $50k to be considered greedy?

The Bell's posting was nothing like that, in fact it was professional and they actually have an HR person. I know several people who work/worked at Bell's and all seemed to love it. I would have pursued it, but it didn't really line up with my goals and I don't like craft beer.

ZetsurinPower fucked around with this message at 14:39 on Jun 12, 2014

# ? Jun 12, 2014 14:33

meanieface: Mar 27, 2012; During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.

CitizenKain posted:

Why is communication so loving difficult for my boss. He seems to carry on conversations in his head with us where he goes over what he wants, gives us some vague hint at what he wants and then wanders away. When things don't happen like he expects, he gets pissy and explains that he told us what he wants and we just didn't listen.

So, couple of weeks ago, he has me mock up a thing in Visio from a drawing he has on his desk. I throw it together really quick and then hit the road to work on a project. Today he comes by and asks why I didn't finish the drawing, as he asked me to not only do the drawing, but trace the cables to where they end up. I head in, trace a bunch, add them to a diagram and hand it back. He asks why I didn't follow the connections to the network taps and trace them from there. I'm sure in his head, he explained what he wanted to me, but goddamn I wish he'd relay that to the real me.

However, nowhere near as bad as Rogue at least.

Have you tried explicitly repeating what he just said, to 'clarify' that you're understanding him correctly? "You want me to put this drawing as-is into Visio, am I understanding this correctly?"

I'm not saying your boss has the communication skills of a small child, it's just that speaking to bosses like they're small children is mysteriously effective. :iiam:

# ? Jun 12, 2014 14:59

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

Does anyone have their specific IT posting from a while back?

# ? Jun 12, 2014 15:11

Cenodoxus: Mar 29, 2012; while [[ true ]] ; do
��pour()
done

Holy poo poo, how have I never seen that before?

ZetsurinPower posted:

dear god that whole thing makes me cringe...how low is the loving bar at that place for $50k to be considered greedy?

I think they summed it up nicely themselves.

quote:

The Rogue Nation is always on the lookout for hardcore unemployables.

Seems that's all they want to get.

So when you subtract all of their :siren:

WE'RE REVOLUTIONARIES, SO HARDCORE :siren:

bullshit, the synopsis of their listing is almost literally, "Are you absolutely incapable of landing a job anywhere else? Guess you'd better settle for us. Lube up."

# ? Jun 12, 2014 15:47

Japanese Dating Sim: Nov 12, 2003; hehe; Lipstick Apathy

Wasn't the thing where the guy's boss wanted him to set up a projector in the middle of a field supposed to happen today? :ohdear:

# ? Jun 12, 2014 15:51

BaseballPCHiker: Jan 16, 2006

Japanese Dating Sim posted:

Wasn't the thing where the guy's boss wanted him to set up a projector in the middle of a field supposed to happen today?

Haha yes sir! Headed out in about an hour. Can't wait to see what it looks like.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 16:01

Japanese Dating Sim: Nov 12, 2003; hehe; Lipstick Apathy

BaseballPCHiker posted:

Haha yes sir! Headed out in about an hour. Can't wait to see what it looks like.

I wish I could request pictures, but I'll settle for a write-up afterward.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 16:02

Cavepimp: Nov 10, 2006

CitizenKain posted:

Why is communication so loving difficult for my boss. He seems to carry on conversations in his head with us where he goes over what he wants, gives us some vague hint at what he wants and then wanders away. When things don't happen like he expects, he gets pissy and explains that he told us what he wants and we just didn't listen.

So, couple of weeks ago, he has me mock up a thing in Visio from a drawing he has on his desk. I throw it together really quick and then hit the road to work on a project. Today he comes by and asks why I didn't finish the drawing, as he asked me to not only do the drawing, but trace the cables to where they end up. I head in, trace a bunch, add them to a diagram and hand it back. He asks why I didn't follow the connections to the network taps and trace them from there. I'm sure in his head, he explained what he wanted to me, but goddamn I wish he'd relay that to the real me.

However, nowhere near as bad as Rogue at least.

I'll admit I sometimes do the same thing as your boss (although not quite as bad), but I always tell my guys "Hey, I do this sometimes. If it isn't clear what I'm asking for, ask me some follow up questions." and make it clear I'll never get frustrated with follow up questions, but I'll almost always get frustrated with an incorrect/inaccurate/incomplete end result. Sounds like he could use some self awareness.

# ? Jun 12, 2014 16:14

GargleBlaster: Mar 17, 2008; Stupid Narutard

Auditors.

However!

I always used to whine in the thread about the young lady in charge of Marketing here deciding that she doesn't like my website efforts and instead of giving me any feedback (she didn't give me one scrap, ever) or even any indication of not liking it, just one day effectively told me that I suck and went to her dad (who happens to be CEO..) to convince him to let her take it off me and pay an external developer to redo it.

Incidentally she was keen to let me know (when I raised polite objection to this rather backstabby move) that I'm too slow, as this developer was going to redo the whole thing (hundreds of products and all) in 2 weeks, effectively implying a "wtf do you do all day". This was about 18 months ago, there's been no sign of it, and the existing site I was happily updating has been static in that time with anyone wanting updates being told not to ask me because there's a much better site coming Real Soon Now.

But now I get to bask in a bitter and vindictive but highly satisfying glow of happiness in that it's audit season. Cometh the process manager.
"Hey GB, we've got auditors coming, one thing they want to see is our website update procedures, so we're going to need you in some meetings for a few days while..."

Never have I been so happy to repeat the words "I'm sorry, it's out of my hands now, you'll need to go and see the ladies in Marketing".

Ahhhhhh
I fart some auditors in your general direction, my dear.... enjoy :smuggo:

(I am mostly over it, life's too short for grudges and I have to work with them so I tend to try and maintain a positive and friendly or at least tolerant relationship. But I'll have to admit... this moment stirred it up again in a satisfying manner)

GargleBlaster fucked around with this message at 16:19 on Jun 12, 2014

# ? Jun 12, 2014 16:14

mewse: May 2, 2006

GargleBlaster posted:

(I am mostly over it, life's too short for grudges and I have to work with them so I tend to try and maintain a positive and friendly or at least tolerant relationship. But I'll have to admit... this moment stirred it up again in a satisfying manner)

Web design is so frustrating because everybody is an expert

# ? Jun 12, 2014 16:24

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# ? May 10, 2024 09:30

wintermuteCF: Dec 9, 2006; LIEK HAI2U!

mewse posted:

Web design is so frustrating because everybody is an expert

"If I can make a Word document I can make a website, right?"

# ? Jun 12, 2014 16:39

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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