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Phone postin don't mind me 
platedlizard fucked around with this message at 06:24 on Jul 11, 2014 |
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Jul 11, 2014 06:12
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| # ? May 16, 2024 02:13 |
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My current favorite conspiracy is that the Navy deliberately kills whales with sonar in order to genocide/keep secret mermaids. On top of that they are also shutting down websites detailing the genocide of mermaids (and not, you know, the sites shutting down because their owners aren't around to maintain them) NOAA, of all things, is behind it. NOAA is the most adorable alphabet agency imo so it's extra hilarious. It's right up there with The Elven Holocaust when it comes to fantasy creature-based conspiracy theories. Let me tell you about how Animal Planet's documentary about a dead 'mermaid' is 100% true some good stuff there.
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Jul 11, 2014 06:23
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Nintendo Kid posted:Yep! It's like taking a time warp back to 1973 when you go to check out in one of them. They also primarily play Christian music over the instore speakers (but no Christian rock because rock is evil!) and refuse to open on Sundays. They've also refused to carry crafting items related to any non-Christian religions or holidays. Are there Islamic crafting items? I want to see them.
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Jul 11, 2014 07:05
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SedanChair posted:Are there Islamic crafting items? I want to see them. Like the "don't draw the prophet" drawing kit?
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Jul 11, 2014 07:58
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The North Tower posted:Like the "don't draw the prophet" drawing kit? Sir jests (shittily), but of course there is. Of particular interest are the traditional tent-quilts and painted tiles, any larger islamic metropol has amazing stuff all over.
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Jul 11, 2014 08:37
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I guess I wasn't thinking of putting the rich history of traditional artisans into the category of "crafts" like you'd find at Michael's or Hobby Lobby.
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Jul 11, 2014 08:42
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Ah, sorry. English isn't my first language, I thought it was the same thing 
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Jul 11, 2014 08:48
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In the spirit of this thread, let me be the first to tell you to gently caress off and die you dirty foreigners. These colors don't run.
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Jul 11, 2014 08:53
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Tias posted:Ah, sorry. English isn't my first language, I thought it was the same thing The word 'craft' could be used for either, but craft stores like these generally have lower-grade stuff for really kitschy art projects plus some other basic material. For higher-quality artistic supplies you'd almost certainly go somewhere else. (Not that I've been to a Hobby Lobby here, but I've been to Michael's.)
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Jul 11, 2014 16:33
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lknW2mzXMMY
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Jul 11, 2014 16:37
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When barcode conspiracy-chat started, I knew that this video had to be posted. It never ceases to be hilarious. For those who haven't clicked the link, it's an 80s music video about how barcodes are the Mark of the Beast. If I remember correctly some weird cult made it to promote joining their wilderness compound. Insane and disturbingly catchy.
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Jul 11, 2014 22:09
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http://redlettermedia.com/best-of-the-worst-wheel-of-the-worst-5/ Red Letter Media actually encountered the complete cult movie VHS
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Jul 11, 2014 22:57
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Has someone uploaded it? I would watch the poo poo out of a full-length version of that craziness.
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Jul 11, 2014 23:20
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Shbobdb posted:Has someone uploaded it? I would watch the poo poo out of a full-length version of that craziness. Prepare yourself, sinner: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RfU5r63AXY I like that they progress from catchy pop songs to insane end-times rambling so slowly you might not even notice until there's a song all about how believing in evolution makes you a pawn of the devil.
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Jul 11, 2014 23:28
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What the fuuuuucccckkkk. So I guess like all other doomsday cults, even if the evil satan barcodes aren't being put on people's foreheads yet, it's liable to happen ANY DAY NOW, right?
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Jul 11, 2014 23:48
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I'm a little shocked they haven't dropped UPCs for QR codes as the new satanic horror. Although to be fair to the Family International, they haven't quite gotten back onto their feet since their prophet lost his mind and killed a bunch of their leadership for raping him as a child.
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Jul 12, 2014 01:54
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Jack Gladney posted:I'm a little shocked they haven't dropped UPCs for QR codes as the new satanic horror. Although to be fair to the Family International, they haven't quite gotten back onto their feet since their prophet lost his mind and killed a bunch of their leadership for raping him as a child. QR codes are just double barcodes so they don't need to come up with extra stuff against them, other than that they are clearly satan squared.
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Jul 12, 2014 02:10
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The mark of the beast is supposed to actually be used for something, so it definitely won't be QR codes.
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Jul 12, 2014 02:19
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Oh goody, is it time for me to post the real poo poo again? Don't Make Me Go Back, Mommy: A Child's Book about Satanic Ritual Abuse    
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Jul 12, 2014 07:13
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What really makes the SOS video is that it's made by the Family International. These guys. Also prolific child abusers and abductors. Poke around the site, they're straight up crazy.
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Jul 12, 2014 07:58
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SedanChair posted:Oh goody, is it time for me to post the real poo poo again? Terrorize your kids into prayer to Jesus today!  gently caress these people with rusty razors, loving monsters. 
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Jul 12, 2014 13:16
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SedanChair posted:Oh goody, is it time for me to post the real poo poo again? Of course the fun thing about Satanic Ritual Abuse is that it never existed.
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Jul 12, 2014 23:00
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For satanic Ritual Abuse panic I recommend a documentary called Cropsey about Staten Island that I really enjoyed. It isn't a perfect documentary and the filmmaker definitely seems confused at the end about exactly what he wants to say but it was interesting and fruitful for me nonetheless. You can probably find it online for free.
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Jul 12, 2014 23:04
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muscles like this? posted:Of course the fun thing about Satanic Ritual Abuse is that it never existed. But we showed kids this book and they said it happened to them!
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Jul 12, 2014 23:05
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It also sent waves across conservative Christian communities, causing them to crack down on things like the dreaded Dungeons and Dragons, Ouija Boards which were clearly real and demonic witchery in action, and basically anything that was fun that wasn't directly related to the Bible (so really, anything that was fun at all). It was a pretty lovely time to be a kid.
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Jul 13, 2014 03:15
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It's really bizarre because the Dungeon and Dragons and Harry Potter hysteria comes off the presumption that magic is real and has very serious consequences. If spells were being published in mainstream books you can get off of Amazon I'm pretty sure it'd make national headlines and DnD would be the most popular hobby ever instead of something weird nerds who don't bathe do. Think of the military and scientific applications.
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Jul 13, 2014 04:13
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RagnarokAngel posted:It's really bizarre because the Dungeon and Dragons and Harry Potter hysteria comes off the presumption that magic is real and has very serious consequences. The wizards are covering everything up with their mind spells, fortunately the light of Jesus allows the righteous to fight back in limited ways.
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Jul 13, 2014 04:20
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Those sorts of people believe that the reason they can't find their keys in the morning is because devils hid them to make them late for work, and that they eventually found their keys because they prayed so hard that God rewarded their faith. They do really think that perfectly mundane things have supernatural explanations, so the "magic" they're afraid of in Dungeons and Dragons is probably poo poo like "the power to question parental authority" and the evil consequences stuff like weakened resistance to masturbation. The parents of one of the kids killed in the Columbine shooting wrote a crazy memoir about their daughter that explained how she had been possessed by a demon because at age 14 she started getting moody and talking back to them and wanted to spend more time alone and make choices for herself. The whole book is about how they all prayed together and eventually their obedient, compliant daughter returned after fighting off the devil clouding her mind (i.e. they broke her spirit and she lost all sense of self). It was a best-seller, and a pretty fascinating look inside the worldview of people who live outwardly normal lives and seem perfectly sane yet interpret their growing daughter's completely normal adolescent psychological development as literal demonic possession. It goes without saying that they saw her murder as Satan's revenge for her escape from his grasp (completely hollow, of course, because she went straight to Heaven).
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Jul 13, 2014 04:36
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Jack Gladney posted:The parents of one of the kids killed in the Columbine shooting wrote a crazy memoir about their daughter that explained how she had been possessed by a demon because at age 14 she started getting moody and talking back to them and wanted to spend more time alone and make choices for herself. The whole book is about how they all prayed together and eventually their obedient, compliant daughter returned after fighting off the devil clouding her mind (i.e. they broke her spirit and she lost all sense of self). It was a best-seller, and a pretty fascinating look inside the worldview of people who live outwardly normal lives and seem perfectly sane yet interpret their growing daughter's completely normal adolescent psychological development as literal demonic possession. It goes without saying that they saw her murder as Satan's revenge for her escape from his grasp (completely hollow, of course, because she went straight to Heaven). Haha holy poo poo how did I never realize this?  She Said Yes posted:One of the most gripping stories to come out of the shooting at Columbine High School in Littleton, Colo., is that of Cassie Bernall: when asked by the gunmen whether she believed in God, she answered yes and then was shot point-blank. Hours after the story emerged, Cassie was hailed a martyr by news media and Christian groups around the world. Her mother's smoothly written account of that day, and of the years that preceded it, provides a fuller picture of a girl who was once very troubled and, ironically, had been for a time as much of a Goth-loving outsider as her killers. Bernall relates how she and her husband intervened after finding letters in Cassie's room that described occult spells and ways to murder one's parents.
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Jul 13, 2014 07:16
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I guess I have a hard time seeing that incident as an amazing act of martyrdom anyway. Like, if a guy pointed a gun at me and asked me if I believe in god, I would just tell the truth because who the hell knows what that guy wants to hear right? Unless I could figure it out on the spot somehow I'd just go with the truth; if I'm going to be shot might as well be shot for what I really am right?
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Jul 13, 2014 07:26
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According to multiple eyewitness accounts from other students it never happened. It's possibly a total fabrication by the mother, or it might have been a different conversation with a different student, or just a bit of folklore that people liked the sound of.
moller fucked around with this message at 07:48 on Jul 13, 2014 |
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Jul 13, 2014 07:45
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That The 90's show had Cassie's best friend on, followed by the mother. Cassie Bernall was a lesbian.
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Jul 13, 2014 08:06
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I found this on YouTube not long ago and it still makes me giggle. Not sure how I found it, but that doesn't really matter anymore. ALERT BREAKING NEWS EARTH HAS 4 MAGNETIC POLES!!!!!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hCL8ZpXM9E quote:THIS WILL COME AS A COMPLETE SHOCK THAT THIS PLANET HAS TWO NORTH POLES AND TWO SOUTH POLES, AND TWO OF THEM ARE RUSHING TOGETHER WHICH WILL IN TURN LEAD TO A FULL MAGNETIC REVERSAL IT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW GUYS, NOT LONG BEFORE WE GET FULL MAGNETIC DISLOCATION AND THEN WE ARE IN UNCHARTED TERRITORY, TO SUPPORT THIS CHANNEL WITH A CONTRIBUTION OR SIMPLY BY THE HOST A COFFEE LINK BELOW
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Jul 13, 2014 08:18
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Well the irony is there is some speculation that the poles might flip about in the scientific literature. Its a process that would take thousands of years and be more or less imperceptable, except to birds maybe. Whatever the case is its no big deal. Its happened a bunch of times before. I'm not sure how this guy imagines it to work, but its just a byproduct of heat differentials inside the core turbulating the flow of molten metals. http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/earth-s-magnetic-field-flip-could-happen-sooner-than-expected/
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Jul 13, 2014 10:04
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I thought part of the "2 Magnetic North Poles" thing was also due to the fact that the "North Magnetic Pole" isn't on the surface of the planet, and our planet isn't a perfect sphere, and something about how it was theorized that the "two north poles" are just the areas closest to the actual magnetic north pole. A show on Discovery talked briefly about it.
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Jul 13, 2014 11:16
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Randalor posted:I thought part of the "2 Magnetic North Poles" thing was also due to the fact that the "North Magnetic Pole" isn't on the surface of the planet, and our planet isn't a perfect sphere, and something about how it was theorized that the "two north poles" are just the areas closest to the actual magnetic north pole. A show on Discovery talked briefly about it. Artistic rendering of a magnetosphere:  Ignore the numbers, they relate to the Wikipedia article I borrowed this from. As I understand it, the two poles would be the points where the outermost blue lines touch the surface of the planet. If the planet was a perfect sphere, they'd touch in exactly the same place; since it's not, they don't.
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Jul 13, 2014 11:34
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ErichZahn posted:That The 90's show had Cassie's best friend on, followed by the mother. What show is this? That sounds a little heavy for the VH-1 pop culture show I'm thinking of.
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Jul 13, 2014 12:37
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Jack Gladney posted:What show is this? That sounds a little heavy for the VH-1 pop culture show I'm thinking of. Wasn't that I Love the 90s?
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Jul 13, 2014 12:56
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Serious question: Aren't the poles "true" location beneath the surface of the earth because they're created by the iron core?
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Jul 13, 2014 17:40
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Doomsday cult stuff is fascinating. Any good sources/media the thread can suggest on, well, any of it?
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Jul 13, 2014 17:53
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