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frenchnewwave posted:What's a cool but inexpensive gift for a 3 year old? Money's tight at the mo and we have a birthday party for a 3 yr old coming up and I'd like to get her something neat/different.
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Jul 13, 2014 21:05
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^^^ I live in Oslo (yes, yes, it's a tiny city by international standards), and when the weather is bad there are sleeping babies parked all along the windows of cafés. flowinprose posted:What? I don't even... do you live in an area where the weather is perfect all year round? Or does she just not nap when the weather outside is unsuitable for it? Also where do you live that kids start kindergarten at 1 year old? hepscat posted:Somewhere in the Nordic world, right? Norway! Where kids sleep outside unless the temperature drops below -10 (that was the one time she slept inside - it took 30 minutes of screaming while I tried every trick in the book, and she slept for 10 minutes. Fun day!), and we have parental leave (with 14 weeks (soon to be 10, boo!) reserved for dad) for 49 weeks with 100 % pay and 59 weeks with 80 % pay. We chose the latter, and some holiday added on means that my daughter will be starting kindergarten when she's just over 13 months, which is pretty average. Many people take unpaid leave so that their children can start later, around 1,5 years. It's a pretty great place to have kids 
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Jul 13, 2014 21:17
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I did a study on a Norwegian population, and we all joked that we wanted to be reborn as a Norwegian because the benefits are so awesome.
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Jul 13, 2014 21:25
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 I just cannot fathom kids sleeping outside in temperatures that cold. I guess you learn something new every day!
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Jul 13, 2014 21:36
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Sockmuppet posted:^^^ I live in Oslo (yes, yes, it's a tiny city by international standards), and when the weather is bad there are sleeping babies parked all along the windows of cafés. I love this so much! Just another reason I think I should have been born/moved to somewhere Nordic. If I could find a job there, I'd move.
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Jul 13, 2014 23:01
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flowinprose posted:
I can totally understand that They're dressed really well (layers of wool), have cold cream in their face on the coldest days, and they lie in special pram sleeping bags (often with wool!), and the pram is often lined with sheep skin (I'm sensing a theme). It looks immensely comfortable and cozy, to be honest, and being warm and tucked in while breathing fresh chilly air is like magic knock out potion for babies. Clotheswise they could easily stand much lower temperatures, but the not over - 10 degrees advice has to do with how small babies can't heat the air up as efficiently as adults, so you risk the air still being too cold when it hits their lungs. But usually it's a bigger problem that they're dressed too well and overheat. In the winter I experiment with clothing and check my daughter every time I bring her in from a nap to find the perfect "warm, but not too warm"-combo.
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Jul 13, 2014 23:06
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My mom said my grandma (dad's mom) would nap her babies on their porch in the winter in Buffalo, NY. She would go on and on about how weird and dumb my grandma was. It was nice to show her the articles about how that's a pretty common practice in Nordic countries and is scientifically sound.
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Jul 13, 2014 23:48
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I love it. It makes sense. Think about it: What's better than having the air be chilly and being all snuggled in like a bug in a rug with soft, fleecy blankets? I sleep like poo poo all summer long, and like a rock during the winter. I will open windows in our bedroom when it's in the 40's outside. It makes me nuts when I see fussy babies overdressed for the weather. Poor little hot things. If you're in shorts and a tee, but your baby has their arms and legs covered, or you have them swaddled in a fleece blanket, why do you think they're cranky? Besides, having fresh air is ALWAYS better, when you can swing it. We keep the house pretty cool during the winter (64F) and it makes both my mom and my MIL crazy. Unending crap about the kids being too cold when they were babies (they weren't. Fleecy coveralls are cozy, and if I had just a little bit less self respect, I'd wear a goddamned Snuggy too.) I think about it like this: When you're cold, you can always put on another layer, or a blanket. When you're hot, you're just loving hot, and no one likes that. Especially to sleep. 
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Jul 14, 2014 01:09
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And I'm guessing kindergarten = daycare, yes? In the states kindergarten is the first formal year of schooling for a child, usually when they are 5 or 6 years old.
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Jul 14, 2014 01:21
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sheri posted:And I'm guessing kindergarten = daycare, yes? In the states kindergarten is the first formal year of schooling for a child, usually when they are 5 or 6 years old. Oh, yeah. It's preschool/daycare from age 1 to 5, but we call it kindergarten, and it's all in the same place, you just move from the little kids room, where it's mostly about learning to socialise and interact with other kids, to the big kids room, where you learn actual things. I found a link! http://www.ntnu.edu/research/irs/before-you-arrive/norwegian-school-system
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Jul 14, 2014 09:32
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This is mostly a rant I suppose. I have been dating a woman with a 2.5 year old (my son is 4.5) and things are fine most of the time, but she is a very very different type of parent than me, just lets her daughter do whatever, doesn't pay attention to her at all etc. The thing that really got me to start rethinking the relationship was the other day she was mad at her daughter (yes, mad at a two year old) and said "Why did I ever become a parent." Right there in front of me, my son and her daughter. Do you guys think I am over reacting or is that whole scenario just absurd?
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Jul 14, 2014 19:15
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Sockmuppet posted:^^^ I live in Oslo (yes, yes, it's a tiny city by international standards), and when the weather is bad there are sleeping babies parked all along the windows of cafés. Oslo by my standards is huge though. My idea of the big city is Vaasa which has 60k pop and I wouldn't feel safe leaving them unsupervised just like that there.
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Jul 14, 2014 19:39
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Bojanglesworth posted:This is mostly a rant I suppose. I have been dating a woman with a 2.5 year old (my son is 4.5) and things are fine most of the time, but she is a very very different type of parent than me, just lets her daughter do whatever, doesn't pay attention to her at all etc. The thing that really got me to start rethinking the relationship was the other day she was mad at her daughter (yes, mad at a two year old) and said "Why did I ever become a parent." Right there in front of me, my son and her daughter. I would personally consider whether it's worth investing further in a relationship with a person whose parenting style differs so significantly from my own, especially when it had the potential to impact your own kid down the road.
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Jul 14, 2014 19:47
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Bojanglesworth posted:This is mostly a rant I suppose. I have been dating a woman with a 2.5 year old (my son is 4.5) and things are fine most of the time, but she is a very very different type of parent than me, just lets her daughter do whatever, doesn't pay attention to her at all etc. The thing that really got me to start rethinking the relationship was the other day she was mad at her daughter (yes, mad at a two year old) and said "Why did I ever become a parent." Right there in front of me, my son and her daughter. Would you leave your kid alone with someone who parents that way? If she got this mad at anything a 2-year-old did, her own kid, how is she going to react when your kid does something really bad? I'd have at least one foot out the door, personally, before things get more serious. That said, if it was clearly a one-off, in-the-moment kind of thing that doesn't match her behaviour normally, things could be salvagable perhaps.
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Jul 14, 2014 19:54
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Bojanglesworth posted:This is mostly a rant I suppose. I have been dating a woman with a 2.5 year old (my son is 4.5) and things are fine most of the time, but she is a very very different type of parent than me, just lets her daughter do whatever, doesn't pay attention to her at all etc. The thing that really got me to start rethinking the relationship was the other day she was mad at her daughter (yes, mad at a two year old) and said "Why did I ever become a parent." Right there in front of me, my son and her daughter. As an isolated incident, most people get frustrated with their kids. Although adults should have enough self control to not say these things in front of the kids.
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Jul 14, 2014 20:01
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Just found out we're having twins (in addition to a 2.5 year old at home) First thought:  First action: 
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Jul 14, 2014 20:11
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Bojanglesworth posted:This is mostly a rant I suppose. I have been dating a woman with a 2.5 year old (my son is 4.5) and things are fine most of the time, but she is a very very different type of parent than me, just lets her daughter do whatever, doesn't pay attention to her at all etc. The thing that really got me to start rethinking the relationship was the other day she was mad at her daughter (yes, mad at a two year old) and said "Why did I ever become a parent." Right there in front of me, my son and her daughter. Talk to her about it, even if you're afraid of what will happen during the conversation. That poo poo's important, and if the comment she made is an indication of her view towards children and dealing with their daily horseshit, then you might have a serious problem on your hands.
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Jul 14, 2014 20:47
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me your dad posted:Just found out we're having twins (in addition to a 2.5 year old at home) Congrats, twins are a special kind of awesome.
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Jul 14, 2014 20:49
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So I decided to go cold turkey with the diapers for our 3 1/2 year old. I realized the only thing really holding him back from potty training is my sheer laziness, and that's not fair to a kid who is clearly ready for preschool and might start feeling self conscious about being the only older toddler around in diapers. He understand he needs to wear underpants to be able to go to school, and there is a big summer camp thing happening at his favorite indoor gym next week and they require kids to be potty trained. I decided after his class today that this was the day for him to give up on diapers, and he is totally on board. Of course, he's said that before and then wet himself without a care, but this time I am not giving up and going back to diapers. This will be interesting! I have a DVD of Elmo and friends talking all about potty training for 60 minutes. I plan on putting that sucker on a nonstop loop for the next week. With any luck, his little sister might be potty trained by the end of the week as well! (just kidding, a mom can dream)
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Jul 15, 2014 00:21
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New American Academy of Pediatrics study was just published. Just going to leave this here:quote:sleep-related infant deaths from 24 states from 2004-2012 in the case reporting system of the National Center for the Review and Prevention of Child Deaths. Cases were divided by younger (0-3 months) and older (4 months to one year) infants. In a total of 8,207 deaths analyzed, majority of the infants (69 percent) were bed-sharing at the time of death. Not going to say anything else because everyone jumped all over me last time and the thread got shut down, but I figure it's important enough to let you know.
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Jul 15, 2014 01:00
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Ariza posted:Not going to say anything else because everyone jumped all over me last time and the thread got shut down, but I figure it's important enough to let you know. Did you guys see that episode of Southland called Bleed Out, where the single-mother detective had a newborn who wouldn't stop crying at night and she was also investigating the co-sleeping death of an infant? Every single time this debate pops up I think of that episode. It encapsulates everything we struggle with as parents, with no clear answer at the end. I had a recent "debate" with another parent over stuff like bottle-propping and texting-while-driving. I also read there is a new initiative to create a system to remind parents that their kids are in the backseat, so they aren't left in hot cars. How did we ever survive as a species? We all want to do everything right by our kids, but then we have to second guess everything we assume we are doing right. Sometimes kids can't sleep alone but can sleep with mom & dad, then logic says to sleep with them so everyone gets rest. But then that creates a whole level of complication, so to be safe don't sleep with them. But then no one sleeps, everyone gets sick, parents lose productivity at work and maybe because you didn't get enough sleep you drive drowsy, putting everyone on the road at risk. Everyone wants to be right when no one is. We just stumble about day by day hoping the bounce house doesn't float away with our kids inside, or that no one is driving drunk and will plow through the intersection as you cross the street with your kids, or that the kids around your newborn are all vaccinated and aren't spreading measles in their wake. Sorry for the ramble. I just see so much online about the "right" way to talk to kids and the "healthy" foods to prepare and the "proper" way to do everything and it makes me wonder how we ever got this far doing everything so "wrong".
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Jul 15, 2014 01:17
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What's bottle propping? Also, on those systems for detecting if you left your infant in the back seat, I don't think they are reliable enough to use yet, and might give parents a false sense of security and make them actually more likely to forget. We have so much stuff to distract us these days, unfortunately. I put something in the back seat I need like my wallet, so if I ever somehow forget, I should realize much quicker.
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Jul 15, 2014 02:06
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greatn posted:What's bottle propping? Propping a bottle up on a boppy or whatever and walking away while the baby eats. Can result in choking, aspiration, suffocation (on whatever it is you used to prop), tooth decay, ear infections.
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Jul 15, 2014 02:48
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greatn posted:What's bottle propping? What the gently caress, seriously, how can someone forget their kid in the back seat... It's the most important cargo in your car, not your wallet, laptop or ipad for christs sake
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Jul 15, 2014 08:55
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Mister Blueberry posted:What the gently caress, seriously, how can someone forget their kid in the back seat... It's the most important cargo in your car, not your wallet, laptop or ipad for christs sake It usually happens when there is a break in the routine. If your husband always takes the kid to daycare, then one day it's your turn, but you're tired and distracted and autopilot takes over and you drive to work as always, park and go in. Of course sometimes lovely parents make lovely decisions and forget their kid in the car because of drugs or alcohol or whatever, but most of the time it happens to people who are just like you and me, and I think ignoring that fact is pretty dangerous, because if you think that only bad parents forget their kid in the car, have them drown in the swimming pool or accidentally run them over when backing out of the drive way, you can become complacent and neglect basic precautions because "only bad parents do those things, and I'm a good parent, so it won't happen to me!" - untill it does, because of a perfect storm of small factors that come together to create a horrible situation.
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Jul 15, 2014 09:56
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Re: Kid-left-in-car-chat: This article completely changed the way I thought about that. It's a long article and it's absolutely heartwrenching, so read it when you've got time and aren't somewhere out in public I guess (and preferably somewhere that you can give your kids a huge cuddle afterward  ) But it's really important and I kind of wish everyone would read it.
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Jul 15, 2014 14:48
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Ariza posted:New American Academy of Pediatrics study was just published. Just going to leave this here: Okay, I'll fall for the bait. What percentage were in households with at least one smoker?
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Jul 15, 2014 15:09
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Ynglaur posted:Okay, I'll fall for the bait. What percentage were in households with at least one smoker? That study is a joke. They didn't even mention smoking or alcohol. I'm shocked it got published in Pediatrics with such a glaring hole. sweeperbravo posted:Re: Kid-left-in-car-chat: This article completely changed the way I thought about that. It's a long article and it's absolutely heartwrenching, so read it when you've got time and aren't somewhere out in public I guess (and preferably somewhere that you can give your kids a huge cuddle afterward This makes me never ever want to be in a position of potentially taking the baby on my own. I'm notoriously absent minded (I use Lookout's alarm function to find my phone at least twice a week). This sounds like a nightmare waiting to happen.
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Jul 15, 2014 15:17
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Rurutia posted:This makes me never ever want to be in a position of potentially taking the baby on my own. I'm notoriously absent minded (I use Lookout's alarm function to find my phone at least twice a week). This sounds like a nightmare waiting to happen. My wife is way more absent minded than I am. I know that mistakes can happen and all but I don't get it. There literally can't be anything more important than your kids. How the gently caress do you forget them.
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Jul 15, 2014 15:30
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jassi007 posted:My wife is way more absent minded than I am. I know that mistakes can happen and all but I don't get it. There literally can't be anything more important than your kids. How the gently caress do you forget them. Did you read the article? It did a pretty good job of explaining the phenomenon. I mean, if you read it and still think that, then cool, whatever, but I guess just be aware that for the majority of humans it's a possible brain glitch that can happen, and continue to have a proud complacency about your own mental capacity? Sorry this is coming out really snarky and nasty sounding, but the whole point of the article is that people who leave their kids in cars can easily be the same people who insist it could never have happened to them. The importance of the child is irrelevant to the inherent fallibility of the human brain.
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Jul 15, 2014 15:36
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Rurutia posted:That study is a joke. They didn't even mention smoking or alcohol. I'm shocked it got published in Pediatrics with such a glaring hole Mystery solved, all those babies belonged to alcoholic smoking obese poor people, it could never happen to MY baby, because I'm a good parent.
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Jul 15, 2014 16:00
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greatn posted:Mystery solved, all those babies belonged to alcoholic smoking obese poor people, it could never happen to MY baby, because I'm a good parent. Haha, what. They're making a conclusion about the greatest risk factor for SIDs, but are selectively including what risk factors they're looking at, and excluding ones which are huge confounders for co-sleeping. That's bad science and bad statistics. If you're going to make it personal, I'm doing crib by bed. But sure, make assumptions about me assuming I'm a 'good parent', this can't be because I know anything about scientific studies or literature. Which is really just laughable considering the very next sentence from me in the same post you just quoted. Rurutia fucked around with this message at 16:08 on Jul 15, 2014 |
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Jul 15, 2014 16:05
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sweeperbravo posted:Did you read the article? It did a pretty good job of explaining the phenomenon. I mean, if you read it and still think that, then cool, whatever, but I guess just be aware that for the majority of humans it's a possible brain glitch that can happen, and continue to have a proud complacency about your own mental capacity? I do understand the idea. I just think the law has no allowance for forgetting something that leads to serious injury or death, and I don't support people getting a pass. Involuntary manslaughter is unintentional death. Our societies laws have decided there is a punishment for death even if it was unintentional. If I had a stress related forgetful spell and left my loaded pistol out of the locked safe in my home where it should be, and my toddler killed himself, society would howl for my blood, and they should. People who leave their children to cook to death are not people that I think highly of, whether or not there is an explanation. Some things are to big to excuse, and that is one of them. I get that nobody thinks it could happen to them until it does, and that is basically what I'm expressing. I can't fathom how the gently caress that could happen to me. I also just get so worked up about it because I honestly don't know how people could go on being any bit responsible for something like that. My dad stressed and stresses to me about being vigilant. Simple accidents can ruin your life. I know people back over their kids in the driveway, and other poo poo like that. I guess I'm really really aware of things like that, probably almost to a paranoid degree? jassi007 fucked around with this message at 16:32 on Jul 15, 2014 |
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Jul 15, 2014 16:19
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So transitioning from crib to real bed. How old was yours when you did it? What do you do if they decide that it's time to get up at 3am?
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Jul 15, 2014 16:39
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We made the transition for her second birthday: she got a "big girl bed". We do have one of those door handle things so she can't open the door to her room from the inside, and we've told her that if she needs anything, she can knock. She's gotten pretty good at knocking (along with shouting "Mommy!" or "Daddy!"), so we've not had any problems aside from the long, twilight struggle to get her to actually try to sleep.
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Jul 15, 2014 16:45
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Papercut posted:So transitioning from crib to real bed. How old was yours when you did it? What do you do if they decide that it's time to get up at 3am? A little after his 2nd birthday, although we are using the transitional crib thing that has the 1/2 rail. We'll probably get a mattress and frame soon and transition it to an actual bed soon.
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Jul 15, 2014 16:56
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My mom was giving me poo poo at 18 months that we haven't put him in a real bed yet. He still rolls all over the place. We were going to wait and see how he is at 2 and turn his crib into a toddler daybed and see how that goes.
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Jul 15, 2014 17:01
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Papercut posted:So transitioning from crib to real bed. How old was yours when you did it? What do you do if they decide that it's time to get up at 3am? Connor was 2 years 4 months, it would have been sooner but a load of stuff got in the way (moving house, prolonged hospital stay for me when baby was born). I started off putting him in the big bed for naps then after a few weeks at night time too. He was actually fine to start with - it took him a fair few months to work out he could get up and wander around. If he wakes up at 3am he comes into our room and gets into bed with us. That usually ends up with his dad leaving and getting into his bed so now it's not unusual to be woken up by a 3 year old loudly whispering "Daddy! You're on my side of the bed - get out!". It's annoying but to be honest I don't really care that much as I'm not the one that has to get out of bed in the middle of the night (because the baby still wakes up multiple times and goes crazy if anyone but me picks her up it's very much baby = me wake up, Connor = his dad) Edit: His bed has a rail, we'll probably leave that on for the forseeable future.
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Jul 15, 2014 17:01
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We were planning on having him use his crib/toddler bed until he got too long for it. Is there any reason not to? One of the things we splurged on was a really nice mattres and I'd like to get as many miles out of it as I can. The bedrooms in our house are kinda small so it takes up a lot less room than a twin sized bed.
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Jul 15, 2014 17:10
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Alterian posted:We were planning on having him use his crib/toddler bed until he got too long for it. Is there any reason not to? One of the things we splurged on was a really nice mattres and I'd like to get as many miles out of it as I can. The bedrooms in our house are kinda small so it takes up a lot less room than a twin sized bed. Our main issue was Connor climbing out of the cot and landing on his head, if you can take the side off then I don't see why it'd be a problem.
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Jul 15, 2014 17:30
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