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Jul 28, 2014 11:47
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Brewster succeeds
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Jul 28, 2014 12:20
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In The Colony, Morpheus and his one of the security guards from Dawn of the Dead decide they are unhappy with their life in the colony. So they wander out into the frozen wastelands, and, low and behold, there be zombies (or crazy cannibals, whatever). They they proceed to leave an obvious way for the zombies/cannibals to follow them back to their lovely colony, where the cannibals/zombies promptly kill everyone and it explodes. Security guard from dawn of the dead dooms the 3 survivors by marching them out into the freezing cold with no plan of any kind. Cube 2: Hypercube is pretty hilariously bad. At the end the girl who was working as an insider for the military or something somehow escapes. Some people tell her, "good job" then shoot her in the head. Honestly that was the funniest part.
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Jul 28, 2014 12:58
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in matrix neo takes the red pill and says whoa
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Jul 30, 2014 06:26
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In Grand Budapest Hotel I fell asleep 20 minutes in, because it looked exactly like every single other Wes Anderson movie blah blah blah pale colours, blah deep prose, blah quirky characters, blah farttttt. I was stuck on a plane for 12 hours and I still couldn't get through it.
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Aug 2, 2014 00:29
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Renaissance Man: Danny Devito is a teacher who introduces extra-retarded rapists to Shakespeare in the hopes that they will mature and grow to become normally-retarded rapists.
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Aug 2, 2014 01:55
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Dead Poet's Society: White people, eh eh eh eh eh
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Aug 2, 2014 03:09
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...of SCIENCE! posted:Dead Poet's Society: White people, eh eh eh eh eh thats a spoiler for pretty much all hollywood movies
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Aug 2, 2014 03:12
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Pumpy Muffinz posted:thats a spoiler for pretty much all hollywood movies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwJhmqLU0so
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Aug 2, 2014 03:19
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noice
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Aug 2, 2014 03:28
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In Batman, Jack Nicholson dances to Prince a lot.
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Aug 2, 2014 10:43
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buteruc posted:In Snowpiercer, people live in a train and eat babies. And the only good parts were with Tilda Swinton. The rest of it was a giant pile of poo poo. Well, glad I skipped this piece of poo poo
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Aug 7, 2014 17:57
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in Expendables 3, Terry Crews dies like 10 minutes into the movie, gently caress this poo poo
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Aug 7, 2014 18:01
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lots of fake spoilers for this one but here's the real deal The Sixth Sense it's literally gaydar and Bruce Willis has been gay all along Cake Smashing Boob fucked around with this message at 18:40 on Aug 7, 2014 |
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Aug 7, 2014 18:18
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ElGroucho posted:Well, glad I skipped this piece of poo poo No, you should see it. I feel like it's something everyone needs to experience at least once. Mostly because I'm angry to have suffered alone.
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Aug 9, 2014 16:25
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in jumanji the whole movie is poo poo and rob-will is an unfunny hack and it turns out its all a dream after all
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Aug 12, 2014 09:46
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In Akira, uh this happens: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQT4qB-RFjk In What Dreams May Come Robin Williams dies in a car crash with all his children and they all go to heaven and his wife later kills herself and she goes to hell and he goes to hell to save her and cuba gooding jr is there and there are christian overtones i think. its a sunday school movie In Spirited Away an eleven year old girls parents who are heavily in debt stop by an abandoned fairground and her parents set up a camp and sedate her, but not fully and also give her heavy doses of psychedelic drugs and proceed to prostitute her to random individuals over the course of two months. They then corroborate their daughters story of whatever she experienced during her hallucination to the police. The story apparently involved both of them being turned into pigs which is quite fitting.
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Aug 12, 2014 11:13
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in cloud atlas tom hanks speaks with a really dumb fake accent and the asian chick from the future turns out to be the jungle people's god
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Aug 25, 2014 08:56
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mills
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Aug 27, 2014 08:01
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in chinatown jack daniels gets his nose cut off
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Aug 27, 2014 08:01
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In Donnie Darko none of the pointless bullshit in the movie actually happens and Donnie dies after a jet engine falls on his house.
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Aug 27, 2014 21:27
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Chasing Amy tells us that what lesbians really want are one-dimensional neckbeards.
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Aug 27, 2014 21:46
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In 28 Weeks Later the moronic plan to re-colonise the world's biggest biohazard site is derailed when two unsupervised children cause the end of the world.
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Aug 27, 2014 21:55
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Grover is the monster at the end of the book
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Aug 27, 2014 21:57
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In Prometheus due to poor editing decisions a bunch of people with no discernible motivation or backstory stumble around in an alien bioweapons facility until they get killed. Also Jesus was an alien.
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Aug 27, 2014 22:08
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Tsinava posted:In Akira, uh this happens: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQT4qB-RFjk you are missing the main thrust of the movie. its about how two gay lovers react to a bigoted society. they both go so far into the closet that they end up hating each other and screaming one anothers' names with a REALLY homo subtext until THAT happens.
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Aug 27, 2014 22:08
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In Upside Down, poo poo is filmed upside down all the time and it's so loving annoying. There was some love story but I couldn't follow it because half of the loving movie was upside down. gently caress.
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Aug 27, 2014 23:52
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Painfully boring movie.
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Aug 28, 2014 00:01
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bucksmash posted:In Howard the Duck a bunch of LAZERS somehow teleport a talking duck to Earth who kicks it with Marty McFly's mom. Also the same LAZERZ teleport a tooth-filled vagina monster from space over too, so they fight that. All people really need to know is Dr Bong isn't the villain.
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Aug 28, 2014 00:34
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Ivor Biggun posted:In Prometheus due to poor editing decisions a bunch of people with no discernible motivation or backstory stumble around in an alien bioweapons facility until they get killed. Also Jesus was an alien.
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Aug 28, 2014 04:09
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In Battlefield Earth cavemen fly fighter jets that haven't been serviced in a thousand years and then nuke John Travolta's home planet. Also they raid Fort Knox .
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Aug 28, 2014 04:41
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In The Other Woman your girlfriend/wife makes you watch a terrible movie that desperately tries to make it up to you by casting Kate Upton. Also includes Niki Minaj, inexplicably.
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Aug 28, 2014 05:14
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platedlizard posted:In Battlefield Earth cavemen fly fighter jets that haven't been serviced in a thousand years and then nuke John Travolta's home planet. Also they raid Fort Knox . this sounds pretty good im going to check it out, thanks
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Aug 28, 2014 06:39
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Soag posted:this sounds pretty good im going to check it out, thanks One of the cavemen rides a horse through a shopping mall and another gets his head blown off with a necklace. Also John Travolta's wife has a really long tongue. I feel this is a really underrated movie to be honest. You should see it at least once.
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Aug 28, 2014 06:47
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Soag posted:this sounds pretty good im going to check it out, thanks I was workin at a theater at the time this came out. A month or so beforehand, a bunch of us had stayed after work to screen some new movie that was coming out. The Skulls, I think. The trailer for battlefield earth came on and the dozen or so people in the theater were dead quiet until this part where Travolta was being a bad guy and giving a giant "im gonna destroy earth suckahs" monologue with these two giant noseplugs stuck up his nostrils, sounding like he had the world's worst head cold. Never before or since have I heard such raucous laughter as I did in that nearly-empty theater. I don't know if the whole movie is so bad its funny like that, however. Never got around to actually watching it. I suspect it is one of those things thats better left to the imagination.
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Aug 28, 2014 11:07
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there's a scene in battlefield earth when john travolta, to show how badass he is, just starts shooting the legs off an entire herd of cows with his laser whatever. like one at a time, just mutilating the poor things. i don't remember what the point of that scene was, just that barry pepper seemed upset by it.
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Aug 28, 2014 12:28
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josh brolin bangs his hot daughter in Oldboy but decides that he likes staying at samuel l jacksons five star hotel
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Aug 28, 2014 13:59
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platedlizard posted:In Battlefield Earth cavemen fly fighter jets that haven't been serviced in a thousand years and then nuke John Travolta's home planet. Also they raid Fort Knox . The best thing I can say about the book Battlefield Earth is that it's better than the movie.
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Aug 28, 2014 14:54
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in Big Hero 6 there's a robot, and he dies at the end of the movie
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Sep 2, 2014 04:56
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Soag posted:in Big Hero 6 there's a robot, and he dies at the end of the movie That was the Iron Giant. 
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Sep 2, 2014 05:08
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