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I'll throw my hat, just for fun and so on. For the slogan, 'Friendliest Megabastard or bust!' For the ad, it would be 30-45 seconds of me, the candidate, jumping off buildings, out of planes and cars as they explode, culminating in me standing in front of the Racecourse Ground's main entrance as the ISS crashes down to earth in the distance, exploding violently. At the end of the ad, only one word is said, 'Wrexham'. Then an overlay to elect me for board president and so on while I smile. For the categories, I choose II and C, D. Why change what's working? Edit: Elections for President on the previous page, make sure to look at it.
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Aug 15, 2014 17:47
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Chapter the Fifth: The Disgrace of Kazan November 1, 2023-December 11, 2023 We're heading into the end of the Group Stage and I'm looking forward to the return of the Welsh Derby. I'm also looking forward to seeing who we get in the FIFA World Cup, which should get scheduled at the start of December.  I'm surprised he's made it into five matches given how frequently he's been hurt this year.  Much better. Especially seeing as Arsenal and Man U are facing off in one of the other quarterfinals while Chelsea has to go across town to Tottenham in another. vs Leeds United, November 4, 2023 Premier League  We're at home? Against the team in 16th place? Let's break out the 3-4-3. It may (read: will) have to be tweaked before it's a fully operational strategy, I've already set both of the outside centerbacks to covering due to Laux and Hammatt only having 14 Pace. The next thing I'm concerned about is the gap between the midfield and the attack, which could lead to breakdowns in play and a need to drop a forward back into an attacking midfielder role. At the very least it'll surprise the crap out of Leeds. Starting Formation: 3-4-3 Attack. Starting 11: Fitzgerald, Laux, Quiboulaz, Hammatt, Reed, Loseille, Bailey (c), Mair, Stringel, Aarts, Thiago. Subs: Kovacevic, O'Hanlon, Morvan, Argenti, Mujkic, Collett. Our first shot isn't until the 18th minute. It happens to be our first goal, as Quiboulaz roofs the ball after a corner kick. We look much better once we get it under our belt. By the 53rd minute we've launched 17 shots, and only three of them have come from range. We do end up conceding on a breakaway, but the final score tells the tale, and I've been able to get Stringel, Aarts and Thiago all on the field at once. Man of the Match: Hammerin' Ed Hammatt   Wrexham 4-1 Leeds  That puts the kaibosh on my plans for using three centerbacks for the moment. He'll need to get some rest and I do not trust O'Hanlon with his job.  They just hired this guy in May after their old coach retired. I'm not saying he wasn't bad- he got them bounced from the Europa League against a Romanian team and they had dropped from midtable to bottom third in the past month or so, but that's a really short leash.  I have a prediction for Football Manager 2015: opposing coaches won't keep picking on your backup goalkeeper. At Paris Saint-Germain, November 8, 2023 Champions League, Group D  A win will be hard to secure, but it will nearly seal PSG's second straight exit from the Champions League at the group stage. I'm little concerned that I don't have Hammatt and Laux fresh for this match, but what can you do. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Counter Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak, O'Hanlon, Quiboulaz, Taffarel, Petts, Bailey, Collett, Shirra, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Fitzgerald, Reed, Hammatt, Morvan, Stringel, Parr, Argenti. PSG is all over us from the moment we kicked off, but we're able to keep them from creating an overwhelming number of good shots. They still score, but it's on a laser from over 30 yards out. We're lucky to get out of the first half only down one. Thiago appears to equalize two minutes after play resumes, but it's called back. So he puts it in the back of the net again two minutes after that. That does it for the scoring, and we walk out of Paris a bit fortunate but with a point. Meanwhile Rubin beat hapless Shakhtar; I'm tempted to send out a weakened squad against them at the end of the month to try and remove one of our biggest rivals for the Champions League.   PSG 1-1 Wrexham  One more reason to throw our Rubin Kazan match.  Through 16 appearances he's still sitting on a respectable four goals and five assists, but I'm pretty happy at the moment that City didn't take me up on that £105m offer.  Time to start acting like a real superstar manager. I want my players encased in bubble wrap and treated as the multi-million pound investments they are, not running about potentially crocking themselves while playing on a horrific Transnistrian pitch in a friendly. Laux is straight out withdrawn from the German team, as is Shirra from the Scottish squad. They both need their beauty rest. vs Sheffield United, November 11, 2023 Premier League  Sheffield United finished 17th and avoided relegation by a single point last year. They have 22 points this year in 10 matches. And it's not like they've had a soft schedule thus far, they have wins against Arsenal, Everton, and at Manchester City. With a two week break upcoming there's no reason to take them lightly. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control. Starting 11: Kovacevic, Reed, Laux, Hammatt, Loseille, Morvan, Bailey, Argenti, Shirra, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Fitzgerald, Cirjak, Quiboulaz, Mair, Petts, Collett, Stringel. Mujkic and Thiago can't corral early opportunities, so it takes until the 15th minute for Meteor to use his skull to put us ahead. Late in the first half w Steve Reed picks up two yellows and is sent off. Now we need to maintain our one goal lead down a man. A shorthanded goal to run our lead to two would be lovely, but our best chances hit the woodwork early in the second half. No need for concern, though. Even with an extra man Sheffield United cannot match us, they have just four shots on the day and we maintained 57% possession throughout the entire match. Our unreal record when having a man sent off continues to get even more bonkers.   Wrexham 1-0 Sheffield Utd  A weeks salary should disabuse you from getting carded twice in ten minutes.   Oh boy,. Here come the waterworks.  Next time it'll be two weeks salary.  Two glorious weeks where I don't have to do anything! Huzzah! So what do I do during my break? I pour through the match listings to see exactly how good we've been when we're given a red card. The answer? Better than we've been when playing at even strength. I don't have the records from the first two seasons at Wrexham, but... Going back to 2016/2017 Total Red Cards: 21 Wins: 13 Draws: 4 Losses: 3 Shorthanded Goals: 12 Goals Conceded: 10 (five from one match vs. Nottingham Forest in 2018) Opponents earned a red card: 2 Red card after 85m+ of play: 5 Since reaching the Premier League in 2019/2020 Total Red Cards: 13 Wins: 9 Draws: 3 Losses: 1 Shorthanded Goals: 10 Goals Conceded: 4 Opponent red cards: 2 Red card after 85m+ of play: 4 That's a 90 point per season pace playing 10 v 11 since we reached the Premier League. I don't want to jinx whatever this is, but...   Oh snap! It's election time! I'm a Marcel “Mo' Money” Muddyman man m'self.  That's one way to put it... The game has a habit of calling rivalry matches between countries a war. They might want to put a few lines of code in the next rendition that make sure certain countries don't have that term used to describe their fixtures.   Several of our youngsters earn their first caps. I wish them the best.   One of them is Fitzgerald, who would never have gotten that clause in his contract if I'd realized he was a kiwi and thus a shoe-in to earn a cap in the near future. I thought it would take him years to get that raise!  I hope negotiations takes least two months. Chelsea don't need new ownership flush with cash during a transfer window... Let me rephrase that. We don't need Chelsea with new ownership flush with cash during a transfer window.     It's not like the schedulers didn't know we had to play in the Club World Cup... Oh well, nothing to be done about it. At Swansea City, November 25, 2023 Premier League, Welsh Derby  It's so good to have you back in the top division, you southern saps! I'm ecstatic that I can again remind you who the best team in Wales is! Starting Formation: 3-4-3 Attack Starting 11: Kovacevic, Laux, Quiboulaz, Hammatt, Cirjak, Loseille, Bailey (c), Morvan, Stringel, Aarts, Thiago. Subs: Fitzgerald, Taffarel, O'Hanlon, Mair, Petts, Argenti, Collett. Thiago scores in the 4th minute, and we'd have scored even earlier but for the sterling efforts of Swansea's crossbar. Hammatt makes it 2-0 from a corner just before halftime. Having three centerbacks on the field is giving opponents fits when it comes to their marking during set pieces. It's a decent win, but not the Greatest Show on Earth event that I want to create. We gave up too many chances, and too many of our shots were off target and from distance. Man of the Match: Ed Hammatt.   Swansea 0-2 Wrexham   I'm glad you think this is your idea. Now we just need to convince Gabbianelli to go out on loan too.  One of the brightest American prospects is on his way to Qatar. I have no clue what MLS is thinking letting him go there rather than stick with Columbus, the kid is good enough for at least a rotation spot in MLS right now, but this is all to the good if it means getting out of the US Soccer Federation's epically borked development system.  Heh. Erm. At Rubin Kazan, November 29, 2023 Champions League, Group D  Here's the £865k question. Do we throw this match in order to screw PSG over? Yes, yes we do. It's unsportsmanlike and in real life would probably get me hauled over hot coals in the media and perhaps sanctioned by UEFA, but PSG and their £200m wage bill can eat a bag of dicks. Even if we lose PSG can still advance by winning their last two matches, so this isn't exactly a Disgrace of Gijón situation where we can remove all hope from another team through our skullduggery. You might notice that most of the names here aren't ones you recognize from my periodic youth intake binges. That's because these are the poor bastards we sign from our academy- the ones we bring in from other organizations can't play Champions League matches without being registered until they've been with the club two years. As such, we have a bunch of no names like Dahi Cooze along with backups like O'Hanlon and Mair in the starting 11. If they pull off a result I'm going to be a little pissed off. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Nash, Cirjak, O'Hanlon, Quiboulaz, Taffarel, Cooze, Mair, Argenti, Rouissi, Churchill, Dawkins. Subs: Fitzgerald, Reed, Hammatt, Taborda, Peate, Allan, Aarts. For the first 30 minutes we outplay Rubin in their home stadium while starting four teenagers with no right to be there. We should really be ahead, and but for a scuffed effort from Argenti we would have been. So it's with great pleasure that I see the Ruskies finally put together an attacking move that deposits the ball past 17 year old Elliot Nash. Even better, I notice that PSG is losing to Shakhtar Donetsk. If PSG draws while Rubin Kazan wins they're out of the Champions League, but if they pull off a win this entire farce could be for nothing. We allow another goal just before the half, but Donetsk drops back into a draw. When Oil Sheik FC pull out a last minute winner in Ukraine, I'm smiling through gritted teeth. It'll all come down to a home match for PSG against Rubin Kazan where the Parisians need a win to advance. We've already sealed our knockout round appearance in the meantime, barring a collapse of unimaginable proportions against Donetsk at the Racecourse Grounds in a few days.   Rubin 2-0 Wrexham  Hard to argue with those results.  But our youth movement continues to impress the old men judging the beauty pagent.  Finally, I can vote for one of my own players! Collett was our first player with a “Worldwide” reputation, which is a big part of who gets nominated for these awards. Rocky Bastable also made the shortlist, and he gets my second place vote out of loyalty.  As the champions of Europe we get a bye into the semifinals. Africa and Oceania already had their We'll play two games in Seoul against clubs from Asia, North America, and/or South America and we'd better win both of them.  For Pete's sake. Taborda hasn't been in a match since late September because he keeps picking up different minor health problems. What's next, he passes out and concusses himself while straining to poop?  Tim Jeffries is doing well in the Scottish Premier League. I'm likely to try and keep him around long term due to his home grown status and because he's the best prospect ever to come out of our youth academy. Cosimo De Blasio has been perfectly decent for Leeds, but isn't giving me any reason to think he's ready to fight for a position here.  Here's hoping he wins.  That's a tough, tough group. England will probably get through, but the second spot is a toss up. It wouldn't be a monumental shock if England didn't make it past the group stage, the other three teams all have serious talent.  Cap him already. He gets lonely when the club facilities are deserted during international breaks. vs Shakhtar Donetsk, December 6, 2023 Champions League, Group D  No futzing about here. I don't want to take any risk that some tiebreaker I'm unaware of will bounce us into third place if/when PSG tops Rubin in the other match and we tie with Rubin on 10 points. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Kovacevic, Reed, Laux, Hammatt, Loseille, Morvan, Bailey, Collett, Shirra, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Fitzgerald, Cirjak, Quiboulaz, Mair, Petts, Argenti, Aarts. Shirra scores before 10 minutes is up, and so does PSG. Shirra scores again at the 20th minute, and PSG is matching him. Shakhtar hit us on the counter, a depressingly frequent event for us these past couple years, but Thiago adds a third before the half. Our second half is essentially a glorified scrimmage, while in Paris Rubin draws back within a shout only to have Carlos Mattias Cardozo lay down the Napoleonic Code. Our effort to sandbag the French giants fails. This also happened to be Mateo Mujkic's 275th appearance with the club, putting him a mere 216 behind the all time leader, Arfon “The Prince of Wales” Griffiths. Mujkic has reached 275 appearances at the age of 26, it's not our of the question that he'd be able to top Griffith's record if he stayed at the club long enough. Man of the Match: Scott Shirra   Wrexham 3-1 Shakhtar vs Aston Villa, December 8, 2023 Premier League  We have only a day before our next match, a visit from Aston Villa. We're due in Seoul the day after that, our already hectic schedule is speeding up as we're playing in almost every tournament conceivable. I suppose it would be theoretically possible for us to get relegated to League One while continuing to win the Champions League every year, thus allowing us to remain in Europe while also gunning for the Johnston's Paint Trophy, but that seems like way too much work and denies us the opportunity to rack up Premiership titles. We're playing a weaker lineup than I prefer, but given that we're playing five matches in about eleven days between the end of the CL group stage, this match, the Club World Cup, and the League Cup semifinal with West Brom when we return this is the only game where I want to risk running out the second team. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Fitzgerald, Cirjak, O'Hanlon, Quiboulaz, Taffarel, Mair, Petts, Argenti, Rouissi, Gabbianelli, Stringel. Subs: Kovacevic, Reed, Laux, Bailey, Allan, Ikeda, Aarts. A hesistant first half from our Dragons results in a goalless first half. Several of our players are nervous, apparently lacking confidence that they can play as well as the first team. We finally go ahead on an own goal with less than 10 minutes left, and it looks like we'll still manage to take all three points. That thought is near instantaneously dashed when we give up the equalizer and leads to my visible fulmination in the technical area, but Gabbianelli finally scores on his fifth shot of the day to restore the lead. My gamble paid off, but only just. Man of the Match: Fabio Gabbianelli.   Wrexham 2-1 Villa  File the surprisingly low expectations of the Wrexham faithful under “bugs to be fixed in Football Manager 2015.”  We were the third to last club to be drawn for the FA Cup. I prefer to let the draw occur team by team, rather than just clicking the “instadraw” button to see who we get. As it went on I was certain we were going to make another trip to Manchester. Not that Crewe Alexandria aren't a perfectly respectable club, but compared to that prospect they're minnows.  Meanwhile we pull Mexican squad Atlas, former Copa America finalists, in the Club World Cup semifinal. Here's hoping that Seoul can top Flamengo while we shrug off Atlas and we can have what amounts to a vacation in Korea.  Our one loss came in a game we intentionally threw, and there was real concern for much of the match that we might accidentally draw of how well our depleted team played. Knocking out PSG would have made my season, if we play them in the later stages of the competition they'll have a real chip on their shoulder. In the league we sit nine points back of United, but if we win both games we have in hand we could catch them with a victory against them on Boxing Day. That would be quite the Christmas present that would be for our supporters. We're also heavily favored to add the Club World Cup to the growing ranks of competitions we've conquered, and similarly thought likely to make the League Cup semifinal. We're in good health, good spirits, and good form. Let's do the mini-Triple and give Manchester United a bloody nose.    Election!AJ_Impy is stepping down as chairman of the board, after a fruitful tenure that saw us establish ourselves as one of the top teams in the world and capture our first major honors, topped off with an emphatic double last season in the Premiership and Champions League. The position is open to anyone who hasn't been Chairman before (i.e. anyone other than AJ_Impy and Sky Shadowing). Anyone who is interested in the position should submit their campaign slogan and a script for a 30 second/1 minute political ad in favor of their candidacy. They should also pick 0-1 options from the Style of Play category and 0-2 of the Transfer Policy category that they will implement should they win the election: Style of Play I) Play possession football This philosophy is essentially tiki-taka, made famous by the late aughts Barcelona and Spanish national teams that were each among the very best ever assembled on the club and national level. It's about keeping suffocating possession of the ball, dazzling our opponents with an array of creative one touch passing, and scoring a ton of goals thanks to how often we have the ball. We already do much of this with our 4-2-3-1 Control, though our version is significantly less interested in possession and more focused on taking our shots when we get them. II) Play attacking football Winning is great and all, but it's much more fun when you're playing positive soccer. Fun, attacking play is focused less around slowly working the ball into the box to create good opportunities and instead around an uptempo slashing style. By it's nature it's not very defensive, the goal is to put shots on net rather than eat up the clock by holding possession. III) Play defensive football What point is running up and down the field all day if you're shipping loads of goals? Why is an “exciting” 3-3 draw better than a 1-0 victory? Defense wins championships, and you will never lose if you never let the other side score. The defensive style is all about good positioning, teamwork, and discipline, and getting the ball upfield on counter-attacks to score the only goal you need to win. IV) Rely on set-pieces We used this in our early seasons, and I think it was bugged. We were among the league leaders for goals from corners, and were getting 20%+ of our goals from set pieces, and I got a big fat zero in this category. Pick this if you want to Transfer Policy A) Sign players from the President's nation If I followed this to the letter it would represent a gigantic change in how I hunt for new talent. I would have to focus on finding players from the President's nation (e.g. for an American chairman I'd be judged based on how many Americans I was bringing to the club). If you choose this option you must state what nationality you would like to use or if you'd prefer the default of Welsh. I will chaff at this mandate regardless, but how cross I get will depend on where the new President is from. Germany, for example, would elicit mild grumbling while the Seychelles might cause an aneurysm. B) Make high profile signings I will be judged based upon the reputation of the players we're signing. That will mean transfers for finished products, who are generally in their late 20s or early 30s. The new chairman will demand that we sign the most renowned footballers in the world, to match our status as the best club in the world. This gets expensive, especially since we generally won't be able to sell them for a high price when they hit a serious age related decline. C) Sign young players for the first team We currently have this enabled. The board will want me to sign players under the age of 24 for the first team, something I've been all too happy to do so far. I've gotten good to perfect marks on this, I think our average first team age has been somewhere between 20-24 for the entire time I've been at Wrexham, and I've only signed a handful of players over thirty. D) Develop through youth We currently have this enabled. The board will look for me to sign teenagers and develop a sexy youth program, eventually graduating them to the senior team. They want to see me poaching young talent from other clubs as well. I've been very successful at this, I can't recall my rating ever dropping below 100% on this measure. You have until 12pm EST Sunday, August 17, to throw your hat into the ring. For reference, the current board: 
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Aug 15, 2014 18:12
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I am glad you intentionally threw. 
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Aug 15, 2014 19:47
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[INT. Night.] JUSTIN BAILEY is in a darkened sports hall in the middle distance, picked out by a spotlight. He's playing keep-up with an odd-shaped ball, pulling off athletic moves to bounce the ball off knee, shoulder, chest and head as often as off his feet. The only sounds come from his amazing ball-work. As we close in, he lobs the ball into the darkness. Another spot picks up MATEO MUJKIC, who charges into the lob with a roar. He taps it back up into the air as we swoop in towards him, and then slips into a spinning roundhouse kick. The ball seems to almost hang in the air as he whips round to hammer it. Just before impact, the camera zooms in to clearly show that it is, in fact, the severed head of Man City manager PATRICK PATTISON. Pattison's head flies through the air in a shimmer of lightning. Tall iron braziers flame to show the head smashing into an eight-foot-tall pyramid of severed heads. Many of the faces are painted with Tackleford colours on their cheeks. A blood-red throne sits atop the mound, snarling Welsh dragons its arms. Seated within it, managerial candidate GHOSTWOODS glowers out at the camera. A golden slogan in a simple, sans-serif font fades in over the screen: WREXHAM A moment later, the rest of the slogan appears below it: TOTAL CONQUEST [Fade to black] Style: II Policy: A, D.
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Aug 15, 2014 20:03
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I am officially throwing my hat in the ring, to help guide Wrexham through to eternal glory! Imagine a boot, stamping on the face of the world, and the camera slowly pans up to reveal Justin Baily, right as he hulks out, then quick action cut to Man Utd tied to the side of a rocket, as Shirra slams his fist down on the launch control. Mujkic and Laux doubling up on chain guns, blowing away Man City. Hammet boots Chelsea into a pit. Then, a slow pan up a mountain of defeated rivals, Barca, Madrid, PSG etc before reaching a solid golden throne made of EPL, champions league, and other cups before reaching Scott Brown, seated, staring intently out into the middle distance as the World Cup fades into view. 2026 flashes across the screen, and fade to black. While I'm in charge we are going to focus primarily on Offense while Continuing to build our youth and sign young superstars.
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Aug 15, 2014 20:06
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Ghostwoods posted:Style: II And which nation do you hail from,
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Aug 15, 2014 20:24
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habeasdorkus posted:And which nation do you hail from, Greece. Like Alexander, I weep at the thought of there being nothing more to conquer. (Mainly, I'm English IRL, but where's the fun in that?)
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Aug 15, 2014 20:37
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Election campaign Ad script Set to the tune of Kanye's power https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L53gjP-TtGE [BLACK AND WHITE; Racecourse Grounds] Wrexham gets scored on as a deflated crowd heads to the exit [CUT TO] Indiana Jones style flight from the US to Wrexham with Scott Brown stepping off the plane [CRESCENDO] Montage of Racecourse Grounds being upgraded in the background. Mujkic, Shirra, Bailey flank and pose behind Brown as our trophies rocket from the sky landing in front of our team [LIGHT DIMS] President Candidate Xtanstic walks up to Scott Brown putting his hand on Brown's shoulder [LASER SHOW LIGHT EXPLOSION] A pedestal erupts from the ground carrying the team towards higher and higher heights as trophies start raining down around us. Style of play II - Attacking style. We will impose our will and we will crush all comers Transfer Policy Continue current policies of C and D but with more of B. We will continue our current path while expanding our development facilities. I expect within 5 years time that we should hoover up all youth prospects, selling off our excess in order to fund strategic mega-transfers that will simultaneously enhance our megabastardom while also weakening our opposition.
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Aug 15, 2014 20:58
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A Great Dane for the Great Game FADE IN: DRONE SHOT, CRAGGY HILLS, CLASSIC WELSH LANDSCAPES M&E: FAINT WIND NOISES (FX NOTE - WINDS SUBSTANTIAL BUT SOOTHING; NOT THREATENING); SLOW FADE UP - SOOTHING TRADITIONAL MUSIC (MUSIC NOTE: TRIPLE HARP, HAUNTING FIDDLE IF POSSIBLE. HAS ENYA BECOME PUBLIC DOMAIN YET?) V/O: STRONG OLDER MALE, GRUFF - THINK WELSH CONNERY OR SOMEWHAT LOWER PITCHED JOHN RHYS-DAVIES; A COMFORTING, SOLID VOICE - THIS MAN HAS WORKED FOR A LIVING; GRANDFATHERLY; WISE We're a small country, but proud. FADE TO: EXT., OUTSIDE VILLAGE HOUSES. A GROUP OF MEN DRESSED IN WORKER'S CLOTHES (PRE-1950S) AT THE END OF A WORKDAY, TALKING, SMILING, JOKING (BUT RESTRAINED) V/O: We know what it takes to make something that lasts, something that's worth holding on to. We know what has value. We know what has worth. FADE TO: STILL MONTAGE OF WREXHAM FACILITIES EVOLVING OVER THE YEARS (AERIAL SHOTS IF POSSIBLE, NOT SATELLITE) V/O: We know that building something that lasts takes more than just throwing a pile of money at it. That it takes time, and sweat, and toil, and character. We have always known this. It's in our bones. FADE TO: (SOME OF THE) SAME GROUP OF MEN, NOW WITH FAMILIES, EATING TOGETHER. THERE'S LOTS OF BACON AND BUTTER AT THE LUNCH TABLE V/O: For almost two hundred years we've chosen Danish butter and bacon because we've known that it's the best, made by craftsmen who take the time needed to do the job right. INSERT: A GREAT DANE FOR THE GREAT GAME V/O: Danes - because if they can make butter and bacon this good, just think what they might do for the best football club in the world. Play attacking football. Sign players from the President's nation (DENMARK) Develop through youth.
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Aug 15, 2014 21:11
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Celebrating History in the Making FADE IN: A shot from behind of a peaceful farmer that slowly rotates around the farmer. Farmer is wearing a Justin Bailey jersey in the field. He is tending to his sheep. V/O: (Liam Neeson in the calmest tone possible) Wrexham, a city of work CUT: Scott Brown holding the Johnstone's Paint Trophy at midfield with Justin Bailey at his side V/O: Where we celebrate the fruits of our labor. CUT: The Dragon statue in front of the Racecourse Ground V/O: Where we have honored the road traveled. Where we construct to honor what has been built. FADE OUT: to Black FADE IN: The Team Hoisting the Premier League Trophy and the Champions Cup Trophy in a split screen V/O: Where the best team in football can be found amidst a small city away from the spotlight. Begin Music: http://youtu.be/Hq8VPYPzKHk CUT To: The team scoring on PSG at home with the Racecourse Ground packed V/O: Now, we have learned this, that the road is never any easier. But the path is what separates us from them. CUT TO: A Wrexham pub littered with soccer hooligans wearing Wrexham kit V/O: This city built this club. These fans put their dreams in that red dragon, and now we honor them with these solemn vows.[/b] CUT TO Kais Rouissi and Ryuta Ikeda training in the youth facilities V/O We will continue to push on with our own and train for the future. CUT TO The Team's 3 goals against Shakhtar. V/O We will push the envelope for who can truly be a megabastard. CUT TO Thiago celebrating a goal. V/O We will play the dynamic attacking football that you love. CUT TO This statue with Scott Brown's face carved in V/O And we will never forget the people who pushed this town of shepherds even harder to become the best in the world. CUT TO Video of the Candidate taking part in the construction of the Racecourse Ground expansion. V/O (Voice has changed to John Boehner soundalike) I'm TheGreyGhost, and I promise you this. In our future together, we will have a statue of the man who shepherded us from nothing. We will have a dedicated hall of fame to the players that changed our lives forever. We will continue to develop the next generations of those players in our academy. And we will never back down from the assertive football that has brought us this far. We have changed the game for who can become a megabastard. Now, let's change those rules and be megabastards on our own terms. Play Possession Football (I.E. 4-2-3-1 Control) Develop Through Youth
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Aug 15, 2014 21:53
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Well gently caress it, time to milk my lacking creative juices. FADE IN: An aerial shot of Wrexham V/O: (Chris Jericho soundalike) 10 years ago, Wrexham took a chance on a just-fired American. CUT TO: Scott Brown's first press conference at Wrexham RADIO: The Wrexham Board has confirmed that former Tackleford manger Scott Brown has been hired by... V/O: Since that fateful day, Wrexham has been on one hell of a ride. From giant-killing... CUT TO: Racecourse Ground, January 7, 2017: Wrexham vs Derby FA Cup Third Round RADIO: Bailey sending another corner in... AND ADRIAN READ SCORES! Wrexham four, Derby nil! V/O:... to three consecutive promotions... CUT TO: Stadium of Light, May 4, 2019: Wrexham vs Sunderland RADIO: Mujkic to Pym who is all alo- GOAL! Wrexham is now 20 minutes away from going to the Premier League! V/O:...to European Glory, Scott Brown has done it all. CUT TO: Santiago Bernabeu, May 27 2023: Wrexham vs Manchester United Champions League final RADIO: AND IT'S ALL OVER! WREXHAM ARE NOW THE CHAMPIONS OF EUROPE! V/O: And if I get elected, I guarantee that Wrexham will experience European Glory and more for as long as I am around. Vote Dreamsicle, and Wrexham will never EVER be disrespected again! And one more thing. Megabastards, the worst is yet to come. We'll play possession soccer as it has not failed us in the last few years. Wrexham shall stay the course on it's youth oriented style. (C and D) Also I just realized my slogan (the last sentence in the ad) is very easy to be misconstrued but I like it. Dreamsicle fucked around with this message at 02:22 on Aug 16, 2014 |
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Aug 16, 2014 00:00
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A Brotherhood Renewed Fade In: A black-and-white image of the press conference of Scott Brown's introduction as Wrexham Manager. VO: 'The most momentous moment in English football history happened because one man was willing to take a chance. Another voice: 'Firing Scott Brown was the stupidest decision Tackleford has ever made. We have to hire him, he'll take us all the way to the top. A series of CUTS: Scott Brown lifting every trophy that he lifted before rising to the premiership. A newspaper headline saying "God-King in Wales? Wrexham's man stunning England." VO: When it comes time to select a new President, there's only one choice and that choice is... John Shadowing Paid for by the Shadowing Family, eternal friends of Wrexham and OH GOD TAKE US BACK IT'S DARK AND COLD DOWN HERE IN THE CHAMPIONSHIP Also, on a more serious note, how is Southampton doing down in the Championship?
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Aug 16, 2014 00:06
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You're walking the league, 49 points through 21 games and 7 up on 2nd place. Liverpool, amusingly, is in 3rd, with 9 draws.
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Aug 16, 2014 01:23
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Note: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ingPbmcNlkQ is playing in the background. A series of short fade-in/fade-out montages, showcasing all of the league trophies won by Wrexham is shown, lingering on the Premier League title. VO: The job of a hero is to do the impossible... Pan over Scott Brown, arms crossed and with a face looking like he's about to gently caress someone up. VO: The job of a team is to make it possible... Slow fade to show Beru04 next to Scott Brown, both posing in front of 11 Premier League trophies, all arranged on a mat as if they are 11 men in formation. Transition to black, words appearing once the transition is complete in elegant golden writing: Beru04/Scott Brown. We must break you.
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Aug 16, 2014 01:24
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habeasdorkus posted:Liverpool, amusingly, is in 3rd, with 9 draws. If I'm not president and I win the prediction contest, I know what I'm going to do.
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Aug 16, 2014 01:33
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And speaking of Southampton:
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Aug 16, 2014 01:56
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Oh boy. Let's see what I can come up with... Style of play: III). Transfer policy: A), D). Country of origin: The USA. Campaign slogan: Two is greater than one. Ad: FADE IN: A pub in Wrexham, standing empty with the exception of one young man standing at the oche of a dart board in the back, one dart in hand. V/O: Over the years... CUT TO: The last darts of Burnett vs. Barneveld at the 1995 BDO World Finals V/O: (From original commentary of the above match) Look at them standing, look at them applauding! CUT TO: Back to the pub. The man takes aim. V/O: ...Wales has produced many triumphant victories. CUT TO: The last darts of Whitlock vs. Webster at the 2008 BDO World Finals V/O: (From original commentary of the above match) A wonderful, worthy world champion - Mark Webster. [...] A Welshman, on top of the world! CUT TO: Back to the pub. The man throws the dart. V/O: Once again, Wales stands on top of the world. CUT TO: The Wrexham team celebrating after the 2023 Champions League victory. V/O: That god-drat Yank has done it again! Wrexham has taken the world by storm, and at the center of it all stands Scott Brown! CUT TO: Back to the pub. Closeup on the dart flying in slow motion. V/O: One only has to wonder, if one American made raised Wales to the top of the world of football... CUT TO: The bullseye of the dart board. The dart hits it right in the middle. Pan up to reveal the dart had an American flag flight. V/O: ...what could two Americans do? CUT TO: Scott Brown walking into the pub. V/O: Scott Brown... CUT TO: The man in the pub walking towards Brown. V/O: ...TheMcD... CUT TO: The two shaking hands. V/O: ...two is greater than one.
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Aug 16, 2014 02:02
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How does Kais Roussi look? I remember him looking like a really great signing way back and one of the first potential star youths you poached, but he seems to have been disappointing any time he gets a chance in the first team.
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Aug 16, 2014 09:22
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A disheveled drunken woman staggers onto the stage of a Tom Jones concert right in the middle of It's Not Unusual, she seizes the mic from the Welsh star to the ring of feedback. [Slurringly] Y... y'should vote fer meee caush I'mma... I'mma clone Jushtin Bailey. Tom Jones still recovering from the shock as security rushes the stage. [Slurringly] An... an... everyone getsh a sheep, I'm like... fuckin' Oprah with sheep. You fuckers know who Oprah is right? Security grapples with the woman as the crowd explodes into applause. [Howlingly] WE'RE GONNA SCORE SO MANY TOUCHDOWNS! Security drags her away to a standing ovation and Tom Jones resumes his show. Style of Play: I and III, this is how you win games right? Transfer Policy: C, D, some A but low priority
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Aug 16, 2014 14:30
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Swansea doing Wales proud tonight!
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Aug 16, 2014 21:12
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I've been playing this game too, and trying my best not to be awful at LLM. The saddest thing I've seen so far is that Scott Scott is an Aussie and not a Scot.
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Aug 16, 2014 21:25
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Scene: An young girl, perhaps 8 years old, is outside of the Racecourse Grounds, surrounded by all of the hardware Wrexham has won. She touches each piece of hardware, counting 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 7... 6... 6... 8... 9... 9... Suddenly, the scene freezes. As the camera slowly zooms in on the child's face, a metallic voice counts down from 10 to 0. When it reaches 0, footage of a nuclear blast is shown. Over the fallout, I say. These are the stakes. To make a squad in which all Dragons can win, or to go into the dark. We must either support Wrexham, or we must die. Cut to white-on-black text as a man urgently says Vote for President Coco13 in January 2024. The stakes are too high for you to stay home. Option D.
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Aug 16, 2014 23:41
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I wonder if habeas is going to do something special on October 24.
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Aug 16, 2014 23:52
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Election, Round 1 Below are the candidates for the next President of Wrexham FC. Please vote for one. If a single candidate is above 50% after the first round, they will be president. Otherwise, the top two will move to a runoff. This round of voting will be open until Wednesday, August 20, at 9am EST. Coco13 supports a philosophy of building through our youth team and not declaring war on the Soviet Union. Coco13 posted:Scene: An young girl, perhaps 8 years old, is outside of the Racecourse Grounds, surrounded by all of the hardware Wrexham has won. She touches each piece of hardware, counting Jenner supports a possession and defense tactical style, as well as our current policies of youth and preferably more Welsh players, and promises a sheep in every bed. Jenner posted:A disheveled drunken woman staggers onto the stage of a Tom Jones concert right in the middle of It's Not Unusual, she seizes the mic from the Welsh star to the ring of feedback. TheMcD supports defensive football, building through our youth squad, and becoming The United States of Wrexham. TheMcD posted:Style of play: III). Beru04 wants to sign Ivan Drago. He will bury you. beru04 posted:Note: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ingPbmcNlkQ is playing in the background. Dreamsicle wishes to keep our focus on young players and formalize our penchant for possession play. Dreamsicle posted:FADE IN: An aerial shot of Wrexham TheGreyGhost supports youth and possession football, and seems to have forgotten that we lost in the Johnstone's Paint Trophy final. TheGreyGhost posted:Celebrating History in the Making Dane thinks Hamlet and Laertes would be super sick on the pitch, and supports attacking play. Dane posted:A Great Dane for the Great Game Xtanstic wants us to become Chelsea if Chelsea was all about scoring 6 goals a match, and picked the best song to portray a megalomaniac that was actually produced by a megalomaniac. (NB: I love me some 'Ye) Xtanstic posted:Election campaign canti32 is all about the literal mountain of trophies I promised, and wants us to play attacking soccer while continuing our youth movement. canti32 posted:I am officially throwing my hat in the ring, to help guide Wrexham through to eternal glory! Ghostwoods posted:[INT. Night.] Lynneth doesn't think we should fix what ain't broken, but wants to see us pummel opponents even harder. He hired Michael Bay to produce his ad. Lynneth posted:For the slogan, 'Friendliest Megabastard or bust!' As P Diddy used to say, Vote or Die. habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 16:07 on Aug 20, 2014 |
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Aug 18, 2014 19:07
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All right, candidates, Buy my endorsement. I will happily anoint one of you as my chosen successor, provided you can appeal to my aims and intentions.
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Aug 18, 2014 19:26
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AJ_Impy posted:All right, candidates, Buy my endorsement. I will happily anoint one of you as my chosen successor, provided you can appeal to my aims and intentions. Remember my slogan "Megabastards, the worst is yet to come?". Well I can guarantee you that Arsenal is on the top of my hitlist.
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Aug 18, 2014 19:30
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I vote Dreamsicle. We won't be playing this game forever, so we might as well break some megabastards while we're here. The relevant question then becomes who's next on the hit list once AJ Impy's final promise is fulfilled. Obliterate Man U and Man City, or crush PSG and Real Madrid?
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Aug 18, 2014 19:45
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Dreamsicle posted:Remember my slogan "Megabastards, the worst is yet to come?". Well I can guarantee you that Arsenal is on the top of my hitlist. Works for me. I hereby anoint Dreamsicle my chosen successor and vote for him to take my place.
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Aug 18, 2014 19:48
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The Sandman posted:I vote Dreamsicle. We won't be playing this game forever, so we might as well break some megabastards while we're here. Obviously next up is City and their fat, old, and idiotic jerk who calls himself a manager. Third is Real Madrid for stealing The Rock from us.
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Aug 18, 2014 19:53
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I'm voting for the United States of Wrexham - TheMcD
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Aug 18, 2014 20:34
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These elections are clearly as rigged as the successful Qatar World Cup bid. Enjoy your slave labour! (getting my whine in early, as per usual FIFA procedures)
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Aug 18, 2014 20:54
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Remember, a vote for me is a vote for America, and it's America that made Wrexham what it is today.
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Aug 18, 2014 20:56
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Dreamsicle gets my vote. Let our enemies lie bowed and broken at our feet!
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Aug 18, 2014 20:58
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Dreamsicle, let's go Full Megabastard.
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Aug 18, 2014 22:08
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I vote Ghostwoods, because gently caress Patrick Pattison. Also Greek players with 15 letters in their names kinda own.
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Aug 18, 2014 22:12
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[Excerpt from Wrexham Board Election Live Debates. Ivan Beru04 is addressing the media following a heated bust-up with Apollo Every-Other-Candidate] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqR0Rd4dbfA Vote beru04, the alternative leads to Rocky V.
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Aug 18, 2014 22:17
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Ghostwoods gets my vote, because I loathe Patrick Pattison with the heat of a thousand suns. Also, we're rapidly going to reach the point where the real challenge is seeing if we can go undefeated in a season. We didn't make any huge additions to the club and I accidentally let the Bastard go and yet it's mid-December and we've lost 1 match. Well, 2 matches.
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Aug 18, 2014 22:18
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Dreamsicle is the one.
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Aug 18, 2014 22:21
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Wales, the USA, and Greece. Three nations united in greatness. Courage. Creativity. Might. Will. Spunk. Three nations with a manifest destiny, culminating in the shining blade that is Wrexham. Our foes will be ground into dust. We shall tear down their stadiums, and sow the earth where they stood with salt. Wales, the USA, and Greece. TOTAL CONQUEST.
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Aug 18, 2014 23:09
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| # ? May 29, 2024 17:52 |
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tanglewood1420 posted:How does Kais Roussi look? I remember him looking like a really great signing way back and one of the first potential star youths you poached, but he seems to have been disappointing any time he gets a chance in the first team. He was 14 years old when he arrived in Wrexham, so he's only 19.5 now, but he hasn't hit a point where he's started improving by leaps and bounds like Piero Argenti had by the same age. That said he's gotten into nine matches this season and has performed OK in them, I don't think he's appreciably worse than Scott Shirra was at the same age. It's just that we're now a club with a dozen or so world class talents and it's much harder to break into our lineup.  Here's Shirra at 18.5 years old, by comparison:  Shirra was certainly a bit better (and was a full year younger) but the difference isn't overwhelming. And that's without considering the additional development that Shirra got from being in over 35 first team games by that point, while Rouissi hadn't been in more than a couple matches until this season. Give it a few years and he'll be fighting for a full time spot. Also, I've played up to January 1st, just past the halfway point the Bastable/Thiago battle is neck and neck. Bastard: 13 goals in 27 appearances. Thiago: 14 goals in 20 appearances. habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 23:26 on Aug 18, 2014 |
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Aug 18, 2014 23:16
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