Open up a little bit further, HAL. Quit digging at your fucking jaw, Dave.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Open up a little bit further, HAL. Quit digging at your fucking jaw, Dave.

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INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

I just got a bad feeling about his price expectations, we didn't haggle or mention anything at all but the way he spoke of all the top end shops h'"e's had it serviced by over the years and the really quite exceptional condition (except for that one easy fix) leads me to believe our ideal price ranges are probably off of eachother by a factor of ten

# ? Aug 22, 2014 01:47

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 11:24

Nidhg00670000: Mar 26, 2010; We're in the pipe, five by five.; Grimey Drawer

That *is* usually the reason some cars keep haunting the for sale pages year after year.

$$$$ INVESTED!

# ? Aug 22, 2014 01:55

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

Im finding rod bearing sets as cheap as $250/ set and mains are about $60 per journal :smithicide:

# ? Aug 22, 2014 02:01

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Could always swap for some other dismal engine. I bet China has some doozies by now.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 02:29

Francis Baconator: Jul 11, 2008; Thanks for the avatar man!

OFFICER 13 INCH posted:

Im finding rod bearing sets as cheap as $250/ set and mains are about $60 per journal

Sounds like it's time for a CVCC swap. :unsmigghh:

It'd be like a super-sleeper...a snoozer.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 02:30

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

I'll be honest with a confirmation of by all accounts a blown engine Im not really looking to pay much more than scrap value for the novelty. Granted, I know that they all are going to have interesting, unpredictable, and most importantly expensive modes of failure but a runner for $1500 up north makes it pretty hard to justify anything higher.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 02:36

cursedshitbox: May 20, 2012; Your rear-end wont survive my hammering.; Fun Shoe

Nidhg00670000 posted:

That *is* usually the reason some cars keep haunting the for sale pages year after year.

$$$$ INVESTED!

I love retards that think cars are investments.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 02:41

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

jammyozzy posted:

Presented without comment:

holy gently caress

# ? Aug 22, 2014 05:00

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

Humbug Scoolbus posted:

holy gently caress

# ? Aug 22, 2014 05:18

Leperflesh: May 17, 2007

Swap in a jaguar V12 somehow.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 05:18

Militant Lesbian: Oct 3, 2002

Leperflesh posted:

Swap in a jaguar V12 somehow.

Too reliable.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 05:33

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

That is a loving symphony of bad ideas. Who designed that motor?

# ? Aug 22, 2014 05:42

Queen_Combat: Jan 15, 2011

# ? Aug 22, 2014 05:48

Guinness: Sep 15, 2004

But it has that intangible Italian soul.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 06:17

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

I dont think theres anyone alive that can curse somebody out more thoroughly than a tiny elderly Italian woman.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 06:24

cakesmith handyman: Jul 22, 2007; Pip-Pip old chap! Last one in is a rotten egg what what.

Jesus gently caress! At least shape the tappet to support the valves, rather than throw on something from the parts bin.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 07:24

Queen_Combat: Jan 15, 2011

No, you see. Now the tappet can be free to spin around in its mount, eliminating the need to create a bespoke, keyed part, and allegedly "distributing wear."

# ? Aug 22, 2014 11:27

cursedshitbox: May 20, 2012; Your rear-end wont survive my hammering.; Fun Shoe

Geirskogul posted:

No, you see. Now the tappet can be free to spin around in its mount, eliminating the need to create a bespoke, keyed part, and allegedly "distributing wear."

That would insinuate the rest of the engine would co-operate long enough.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 15:43

West SAAB Story: Mar 13, 2014; by Athanatos
(and can't post for 206 days!)

I want to see you tow the Biturbo around behind your Honda.

cursedshitbox posted:

That would insinuate the rest of the engine would co-operate long enough.

640 revolutions ought to be enough for anyone. - Bill "Angelo" Gattuci

West SAAB Story fucked around with this message at 16:04 on Aug 22, 2014

# ? Aug 22, 2014 16:01

MrKatharsis: Nov 29, 2003; feel the bern

OFFICER 13 INCH posted:

I'll be honest with a confirmation of by all accounts a blown engine Im not really looking to pay much more than scrap value for the novelty. Granted, I know that they all are going to have interesting, unpredictable, and most importantly expensive modes of failure but a runner for $1500 up north makes it pretty hard to justify anything higher.

$350 and a kick in the jimmies would be fair I think.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 16:20

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:12

Kia Soul Enthusias: May 9, 2004; zoom-zoom; Toilet Rascal

oh god

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:15

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

The liquid is gasoline, right?

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:18

cakesmith handyman: Jul 22, 2007; Pip-Pip old chap! Last one in is a rotten egg what what.

It's either spider venom or semen.

Ahem. liquid

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:21

Leperflesh: May 17, 2007

It's tears.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:25

West SAAB Story: Mar 13, 2014; by Athanatos
(and can't post for 206 days!)

Seat Safety Switch posted:

The liquid is gasoline, right?

First thought that came to mind.

By the amount of dirt under the cover, I assume the entire cover crumbled under the weight of the UV rays that have been on it since, oh, 2001? (Much like the Biturbo will when touched.)

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:29

Astonishing Wang: Nov 3, 2004

God this is such a stupid idea, and It's not even cool looking. Don't do it dude, even in a perfect world where nobody ever drops an exhaust manifold on their dick you're only going to get about 10 minutes of fun out of this thing. A buttload of dollars probably to get it running only to find out that it just broke again because you stepped on the gas too hard and it caught on fire.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:40

West SAAB Story: Mar 13, 2014; by Athanatos
(and can't post for 206 days!)

Astonishing Wang posted:

God this is such a stupid idea, and It's not even cool looking. Don't do it dude, even in a perfect world where nobody ever drops an exhaust manifold on their dick you're only going to get about 10 minutes of fun out of this thing. A buttload of dollars probably to get it running only to find out that it just broke again because you stepped on the gas too hard and it caught on fire.

Hey. gently caress you. He's OUR playtoy, and we'll continue to feed his bad ideas if we want. < :mad:

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:41

SlimManFat: Nov 12, 2010; RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST RUST

Astonishing Wang posted:

God this is such a stupid idea, and It's not even cool looking. Don't do it dude, even in a perfect world where nobody ever drops an exhaust manifold on their dick you're only going to get about 10 minutes of fun out of this thing. A buttload of dollars probably to get it running only to find out that it just broke again because you stepped on the gas too hard and it caught on fire.

DISREGARD THIS POST AND YOU CAN DRIVE A MASERATI ITS A GOOD IDEA I SWEAR

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:45

everdave: Nov 14, 2005

Astonishing Wang posted:

God this is such a stupid idea, and It's not even cool looking. Don't do it dude, even in a perfect world where nobody ever drops an exhaust manifold on their dick you're only going to get about 10 minutes of fun out of this thing. A buttload of dollars probably to get it running only to find out that it just broke again because you stepped on the gas too hard and it caught on fire.

This Italian sports car has been patiently waiting, biding it's time until the rightful owner was found. That owner is 13 inch. There is not a chance in the universe that this could go wrong.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 18:51

Astonishing Wang: Nov 3, 2004

OK I changed my mind - get on it 13"

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:05

dubzee: Oct 23, 2008

Let the man have his ~~nightmare~~ dream!

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:07

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

I have found some kind of temporary sanity and theres poo poo blood and cum on my hands~

More pics incoming as soon as I get them uploaded. We are negotiating.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:10

meatpimp: May 15, 2004; Psst -- Wanna buy

EVERYWHERE
some high-quality thread's DESTROYED!

OFFICER 13 INCH posted:

I have found some kind of temporary sanity and theres poo poo blood and cum on my hands~

More pics incoming as soon as I get them uploaded. We are negotiating.

So much missing, disconnected and just wrong. You've got to do it.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:15

Dick Trauma: Nov 30, 2007; God damn it, you've got to be kind.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:16

Astonishing Wang: Nov 3, 2004

I can't seem to find the Haynes manual for this car, weird.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:16

IronCastKnight: Jul 27, 2013

Astonishing Wang posted:

I can't seem to find the Haynes manual for this car, weird.

The guys they assigned to do the teardown and rebuild were found living in a shack made of human skin and bones under an overpass in Kentucky three months after their sudden disappearance, and the only thing the police got from them under questioning was a combination of ranting in an unknown language and screaming.

# ? Aug 22, 2014 19:31