Microsoft: ~*spooky thread*~ post if you dare

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Phoenixan: Jan 16, 2010; Just Keep Cool-idge

Thanks Ants posted:

"hey lets get a look at you jim"

starts a skype call

"youre looking very clear in that facetime there"

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:16

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 10, 2024 00:18

kitten emergency: Jan 13, 2008; get meow this wack-ass crystal prison

the endgame here is buying a franchise to rebrand it so there's no way they can gently caress up their marketing

Seattle Surfaces with Bing powered by Windows Professional Edition SP2.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:17

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

uncurable mlady posted:

the endgame here is buying a franchise to rebrand it so there's no way they can gently caress up their marketing

lol theyll always find a way. they'll rename the product midseason and not be allowed to change the team name.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:19

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; OFFICIAL #1 GNOME FAN

uncurable mlady posted:

the endgame here is buying a franchise to rebrand it so there's no way they can gently caress up their marketing

Seattle Surfaces with Bing powered by Windows Professional Edition SP2.

honestly surprised they didnt name their dumb football app "NFL Home Edition LIVE" or something

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:19

kitten emergency: Jan 13, 2008; get meow this wack-ass crystal prison

this year's super bowl is going to be fantastic because you loving know they've already blown millions+ on adverts during it for surface probably referencing the use throughout the year

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:21

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

half time show of dubstep dancing and clicking in, having discontinued the keyboard 3 weeks before.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:22

kitten emergency: Jan 13, 2008; get meow this wack-ass crystal prison

"hey boss we're trying to find stills of people actually using the surface on the sidelines for this ad"

"eh just make sure the box is in the background somewhere"

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:24

Dixie Cretin Seaman: Jan 22, 2008; all hat and one catte; Hot Rope Guy

uncurable mlady posted:

the endgame here is buying a franchise to rebrand it so there's no way they can gently caress up their marketing

Seattle Surfaces with Bing powered by Windows Professional Edition SP2.

steve ballmer's secret plans laid bare

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:25

bring back old gbs: Feb 28, 2007; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

uncurable mlady posted:

eventually there's just going to be a guy that walks out in front of the camera every 45 seconds to hold up a giant surface logo

microsoft introduces pop up ads on tv

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:25

theadder: Dec 30, 2011

colbylol posted:

minecraft is poo poo you nerds lol

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:31

HAIL eSATA-n: Apr 7, 2007

32MB OF ESRAM posted:

microsoft introduces pop up ads on tv

only with kinect

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:52

Phoenixan: Jan 16, 2010; Just Keep Cool-idge

"say 'FOOTBALL!' to continue"

# ? Sep 15, 2014 00:57

pseudorandom name: May 6, 2007

I wonder if the FOX NFL staff were specifically instructed to refer to the Surfaces as iPads prior to Microsoft giving them money.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 01:10

FCKGW: May 21, 2006

NFL had some promo or something they were dpi and it was in front of a bunch of windows live tiles.

they made no mention of it from what I can recall.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 04:48

Assepoester: Jul 18, 2004; Can't post for 10 years!; Melman v2

Microsoft should have just given them a bunch of iPads, but put them in kickstandable cases that say SURFACE on the back in giant letters.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 07:25

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

surfart

# ? Sep 15, 2014 08:46

Korean Boomhauer: Sep 4, 2008

Metrication posted:

loving lmao is this the 'charms' replacement?

Wiggly Wayne DDS posted:

you'll get the option of metro start menu or classic metro

10 bux says turning on metro start disables multiple desktops for some reason

# ? Sep 15, 2014 09:13

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

Korean Boomhauer posted:

loving lmao is this the 'charms' replacement?

at least it's something visible and discoverable.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 09:28

minivanmegafun: Jul 27, 2004

welp, mojang deal is official. two point five billion earth dollars.

https://mojang.com/2014/09/yes-were-being-bought-by-microsoft/

# ? Sep 15, 2014 14:04

Fabricated: Apr 9, 2007; Living the Dream

minivanmegafun posted:

welp, mojang deal is official. two point five billion earth dollars.

https://mojang.com/2014/09/yes-were-being-bought-by-microsoft/

lmao, microsoft is so irredeemably retarded

# ? Sep 15, 2014 14:05

Metrication: Dec 12, 2010; Raskin had one problem: Jobs regarded him as an insufferable theorist or, to use Jobs's own more precise terminology, "a shithead who sucks".

As you might already know, Notch is the creator of Minecraft and the majority shareholder at Mojang. He�s decided that he doesn�t want the responsibility of owning a company of such global significance. Over the past few years he�s made attempts to work on smaller projects, but the pressure of owning Minecraft became too much for him to handle. The only option was to sell Mojang. He�ll continue to do cool stuff though. Don�t worry about that.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 14:17

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

he;lp

im dying

# ? Sep 15, 2014 14:17

Blackula69: Apr 1, 2007; ＤＥＨＵＭＡＮＩＺＥＹＯＵＲＳＥＬＦ＆ＦＡＣＥＴＯＢＬＡＣＵＬＡ

lol notch walking away

that rules tbqh

# ? Sep 15, 2014 14:51

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Blackula69 posted:

lol notch walking away

walking away with two billion dollars stuffed in his pocket

# ? Sep 15, 2014 14:54

minivanmegafun: Jul 27, 2004

ahahaah notch's statement about this rules.

quote:

I'm leaving Mojang

I don�t see myself as a real game developer. I make games because it�s fun, and because I love games and I love to program, but I don�t make games with the intention of them becoming huge hits, and I don�t try to change the world. Minecraft certainly became a huge hit, and people are telling me it�s changed games. I never meant for it to do either. It�s certainly flattering, and to gradually get thrust into some kind of public spotlight is interesting.

A relatively long time ago, I decided to step down from Minecraft development. Jens was the perfect person to take over leading it, and I wanted to try to do new things. At first, I failed by trying to make something big again, but since I decided to just stick to small prototypes and interesting challenges, I�ve had so much fun with work. I wasn�t exactly sure how I fit into Mojang where people did actual work, but since people said I was important for the culture, I stayed.

I was at home with a bad cold a couple of weeks ago when the internet exploded with hate against me over some kind of EULA situation that I had nothing to do with. I was confused. I didn�t understand. I tweeted this in frustration. Later on, I watched the This is Phil Fish video on YouTube and started to realize I didn�t have the connection to my fans I thought I had. I�ve become a symbol. I don�t want to be a symbol, responsible for something huge that I don�t understand, that I don�t want to work on, that keeps coming back to me. I�m not an entrepreneur. I�m not a CEO. I�m a nerdy computer programmer who likes to have opinions on Twitter.

As soon as this deal is finalized, I will leave Mojang and go back to doing Ludum Dares and small web experiments. If I ever accidentally make something that seems to gain traction, I�ll probably abandon it immediately.

Considering the public image of me already is a bit skewed, I don�t expect to get away from negative comments by doing this, but at least now I won�t feel a responsibility to read them.

I�m aware this goes against a lot of what I�ve said in public. I have no good response to that. I�m also aware a lot of you were using me as a symbol of some perceived struggle. I�m not. I�m a person, and I�m right there struggling with you.

I love you. All of you. Thank you for turning Minecraft into what it has become, but there are too many of you, and I can�t be responsible for something this big. In one sense, it belongs to Microsoft now. In a much bigger sense, it�s belonged to all of you for a long time, and that will never change.

It�s not about the money. It�s about my sanity.

http://notch.net/2014/09/im-leaving-mojang/

http://pastebin.com/n1qTeikM

minivanmegafun fucked around with this message at 15:05 on Sep 15, 2014

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:02

Joe 30330: Dec 20, 2007; "We have this notion that if you're poor, you cannot do it. Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids."

As the audience reluctantly began to applaud during the silence, Biden tried to fix his remarks.

"Wealthy kids, black kids, Asian kids -- no, I really mean it." Biden said.

The founders: Notch, Carl, and Jakob are leaving. We don�t know what they�re planning. It won�t be Minecraft-related but it will probably be cool.

when reached for comment, notch confirmed this included "swimming atop piles of cash a la scrooge mcduck"

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:03

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

minivanmegafun posted:

ahahaah notch's statement about this rules.

http://pastebin.com/n1qTeikM

what a goddamned loving pussy.

his statement should have literally been

"To my detractors and critics for this move, 2 billion dollars bitches, suck it"

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:05

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

tbf, sweden's taxes being what they are, notch is probably left with, like, 1.5 billion.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:06

PokeJoe: Aug 24, 2004; hail cgatan

is minecraft actually a finished game? last I ever knew it was just a thing you bought alpha/beta access to

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:15

PokeJoe: Aug 24, 2004; hail cgatan

I dont want to be a ceo, I just wanna program

*becomes idle rich*

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:17

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

Wheany posted:

tbf, sweden's taxes being what they are, notch is probably left with, like, 1.5 billion.

yeah, definitely

one thing that notch 100% did not do with his two billion dollars is spend a few thousand dollars on an accountant to help him avoid taxes.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:21

super fart shooter: Feb 11, 2003; -quacka fat-

minecraft was in alpha when it first got popular so then they kicked it through "beta" and "release" so they could jack up the pricetag, even though it didn't pass any developmental milestiones and barely changed at all from being a janky unifinished pos

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:23

MORE CURLY FRIES: Apr 8, 2004

PokeJoe posted:

I dont want to be a ceo, I just wanna program

*becomes idle rich*

yes please

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:33

Dubstep Jesus: Jun 27, 2012; by exmarx

lol if you would still program after making 2.5 billion

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:39

carry on then: Jul 10, 2010; by VideoGames
(and can't post for 10 years!)

super fart shooter posted:

minecraft was in alpha when it first got popular so then they kicked it through "beta" and "release" so they could jack up the pricetag, even though it didn't pass any developmental milestiones and barely changed at all from being a janky unifinished pos

im pretty sure the company that ported it to consoles has done far more work to improve the experience of actually playing minecraft than mojang has

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:45

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

carry on then posted:

im pretty sure the company that ported it to consoles has done far more work to improve the experience of actually playing minecraft than mojang has

also mods on pc

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:55

MORE CURLY FRIES: Apr 8, 2004

slogsdon posted:

lol if you would still program after making 2.5 billion

well id get bored on a wednesday and want to make a dumb twitter bot

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:55

Fabricated: Apr 9, 2007; Living the Dream

maybe its the lf in me but i'd feel kinad gross if i had 2.5 billion dollars

im really boring; i don't think i could spend that much money if i tried and i don't have any vices taht i could spend that much money on

# ? Sep 15, 2014 15:59

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'