IS.exe

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > IS.exe

DangerDan: May 31, 2011; FULTON: The Freshmaker

mr.capps posted:

>Switch to Melek Taus
>Stare at the large incomprehensible chess like game board between you and Mohammed.
>Move the two orange jump suit wearing pieces towards the mountain in the middle of the game board.
>Say to Mohammed, "Our game has been going on for longer than a millennium. Lets end it today."
>Go all in.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:08

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 04:09

Niemat: Mar 21, 2011; I gave that pitch vibrato. Pitches love vibrato.

mr.capps posted:

>Switch to Melek Taus
>Stare at the large incomprehensible chess like game board between you and Mohammed.
>Move the two orange jump suit wearing pieces towards the mountain in the middle of the game board.
>Say to Mohammed, "Our game has been going on for longer than a millennium. Lets end it today."
>Go all in.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:08

Tenzarin: Jul 24, 2007; .; Taco Defender

> Switch to some random person outside somethingawful HQ as ISIS attacks for this post
> Switch to Lowtax putting on his battle armor.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:15

Van Kraken: Feb 13, 2012

> Have the mountain come to us.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:21

Applewhite: Aug 16, 2014; by vyelkin; Nap Ghost

Van Kraken posted:

> Have the mountain come to us.

>Make sure the terrorist camp is between you and the mountain first.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:22

bukkits: Mar 7, 2013

visceril posted:

>drive away from the camp and shoot up any other vehicles on the way out
>once you are a safe distance away, convert your orange jumpsuits into gokupants

A reasonable command?!

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:29

Tenzarin: Jul 24, 2007; .; Taco Defender

> Switch to mountain

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:31

Shinjobi: Jul 10, 2008; Gravy Boat 2k

>during the drive jam out to "Jock Jams" which was inexplicably left in the truck

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:32

tuyop: Sep 15, 2006; Every second that we're not growing BASIL is a second wasted; Fun Shoe

>Go to Dubai instead and get your hookers and blow on.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:33

visceril: Feb 24, 2008

tuyop posted:

>Go to Dubai instead and get your hookers and blow on.

>by "hookers and blow" you mean fellate Caro the entire time you are escaping the IS camp up until you get to making goku pants for each other. Even if he cums don't stop

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:37

Thump!: Nov 25, 2007; Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!

visceril posted:

>drive away from the camp and shoot up any other vehicles on the way out
>once you are a safe distance away, convert your orange jumpsuits into gokupants

# ? Sep 15, 2014 20:51

Nude Bog Lurker: Jan 2, 2007; Fun Shoe

> Get a laptop.
> Get on SA and go to the IS.exe thread.
> Post unfunny lolrandom bullshit, make it at least four lines long.
> Get emptyquoted for five pages.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:00

Mymla: Aug 12, 2010

Nude Bog Lurker posted:

> Get a laptop.
> Get on SA and go to the IS.exe thread.
> Post unfunny lolrandom bullshit, make it at least four lines long.
> Get emptyquoted for five pages.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:30

Literally Kermit: Mar 4, 2012; t

Nude Bog Lurker posted:

> Suck Caro's dick, and spit the semen into the eyes of your attackers so they become schizophrenic.
> Watch a Youtube first so you know what to do.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:38

midnightclimax: Dec 3, 2011; by XyloJW

Nude Bog Lurker posted:

> Get a laptop.
> Get on SA and go to the IS.exe thread.
> Post unfunny lolrandom bullshit, make it at least four lines long.
> Get emptyquoted for five pages.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:50

the_steve: Nov 9, 2005; We're always hiring!

Put googly eyes on our dick, give our dick the true sight.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:50

smilingfish: Sep 18, 2012; fuck you i am smart

Nude Bog Lurker posted:

> Get a laptop.
> Get on SA and go to the IS.exe thread.
> Post unfunny lolrandom bullshit, make it at least four lines long.
> Get emptyquoted for five pages.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:55

nomadologique: Mar 9, 2011; DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO

lot o grumps itt

# ? Sep 15, 2014 21:58

Sojenus: Dec 28, 2008

Nude Bog Lurker posted:

> Get a laptop.
> Get on SA and go to the IS.exe thread.
> Post unfunny lolrandom bullshit, make it at least four lines long.
> Get emptyquoted for five pages.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:00

Dr. Witherbone: Nov 1, 2010; CHEESE LOOKS ON IN
DESPAIR BUT ALSO WITH
AN ERECTION

Though for real long strings of multiple commands is kinda cheating it/a lameroid thing to do.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:02

Literally Kermit: Mar 4, 2012; t

Dr. Witherbone posted:

Though for real long strings of multiple commands is kinda cheating it/a lameroid thing to do.

It's true, it is. I'll keep 'em shorter from now on. I didn't know this was so serious!

I make no apologies for attempting to create Outer Heaven: Terrorist Cocksucking Edition. :colbert:

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:15

Atma: Sep 16, 2002; College Slice

Dr. Witherbone posted:

Though for real long strings of multiple commands is kinda cheating it/a lameroid thing to do.

Multiple commands at once are kind of against the spirit of these adventure games. The idea is to perform an action and then act upon the given result.

A lot of these commands assume certain things will happen when the previous command hasn't even resolved yet.

Instead of ">shoot man in hand, take gun, 360 backflip into airplane and fly to luxembourg to kill the Big Boss" just try and stick with ">shoot man in hand, take gun." See what happens, and then react to that.

I've been letting multiple commands slide when I think they're funny, and have been killing the player when they don't make sense.

Anyway, I'm going to start taking only the first command when someone submits multiple commands.

The Melek Taus chess thing is a pretty good scene, though. It may be the last one to resolve. It's not really a command though, more of a narrative. 2nd place will probably be the true command.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:16

Atma: Sep 16, 2002; College Slice

Literally Kermit posted:

It's true, it is. I'll keep 'em shorter from now on. I didn't know this was so serious!

I make no apologies for attempting to create Outer Heaven: Terrorist Cocksucking Edition.

You're fine. Just better to nip it in the bud before every voted command becomes a paragraph of text and it takes me 3 hours to finish the assets for it.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:17

Sole.Sushi: Feb 19, 2008; Seaweed!? Get the fuck out!

>Explain the Tao to Caro

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:22

CharlestonJew: Jul 7, 2011; Illegal Hen

Search for a pair of Truck Nutz to put on the truck

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:25

visceril: Feb 24, 2008

Ok Atma! Allow me to rephrase my command:

>get in the car with Caro in the back manning the gun and drive to safety
>if we survive and are safe, convert orange jumpsuits to Goku pants

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:30

Explosive Tampons: Jul 9, 2014; Your days are gone!!!

Atma please don't let this story go to an unrelated scene with lowtax doing zany stuff around the world with an Iron Man suit, with multiple line commands per post.

please.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:33

Applewhite: Aug 16, 2014; by vyelkin; Nap Ghost

>RED MILES

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:34

The Droid: Jun 11, 2012

the_steve posted:

Tell Caro we have an even better idea: we're going to go to the mountain.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:35

RandomPauI: Nov 24, 2006; Grimey Drawer

>write to do/bucket list

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:35

Regalingualius: Jan 7, 2012; We gazed into the eyes of madness... And all we found was horny.

>Cast "Sing Gnarls Barkley", then go through the camp and reenact the "Going On" music video to convert the ISIS militants.

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:36

Shinjobi: Jul 10, 2008; Gravy Boat 2k

>chaos reigns

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:37

Lord_Brand_X: Nov 3, 2009

> Loot nearby tent for weapons, food, water, gasoline, holy writings, virgins, etc

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:44

Cactus Ghost: Dec 20, 2003; you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

making posts about this internet art game is right serious business and i'll have you all know i don't cotton to all your tomfoolery

henceforth, only sensible, gentlemanly posts will be honoured

>sip tea

# ? Sep 15, 2014 22:51

Vavrek: Mar 2, 2013; I like your style hombre, but this is no laughing matter. Assault on a police officer. Theft of police property. Illegal possession of a firearm. FIVE counts of attempted murder. That comes to... 29 dollars and 40 cents. Cash, cheque, or credit card?