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i say swears online
Mar 4, 2005

Willa Rogers posted:

There's even a parody site based on the Dems' emails this year: http://emailsfromthedccc.tumblr.com

It's hard to tell the parodies from the real emails they're sending.

I love this.

quote:

POLLING BEAR: Well, Billy, it’s all up to your parents.
SUZY: Our parents?
POLLING BEAR: That’s right, Suzy. We need your parents to come up with $50,000 by midnight tomorrow, or else!
Kids gasp.
SUZY: Or else what?
POLLING BEAR: That’s not for me to say, Suzy. But at a minimum, conservative policies will render their jobs obsolete and their savings worthless, and your personal autonomy as a woman will be outlawed!
Kids gasp.
STEVEY: Polling Bear, my dad says you’re wrong about this, that only the markets can create jobs and prosperity, and that free birth control is for women who can’t keep it in their pants.
POLLING BEAR: Your dad sounds like a real rear end in a top hat, Stevey.
Kids gasp.
BILLY: So what do we do, Polling Bear?
POLLING BEAR: Why, get your parents to donate, of course!
SUZY: But isn’t political fundraising a race to the bottom that perpetuates our broken legislative system and enslaves progressive candidates to the same forces pushing the policies we’re campaigning against?
Polling Bear pauses for 45 seconds.
POLLING BEAR: No!

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Pythagoras a trois
Feb 19, 2004

I have a lot of points to make and I will make them later.

MickeyFinn posted:

About $3k/person.

So like 5x Bush tax rebates.

Mr E
Sep 18, 2007

I somehow have DCCC emails in both of my accounts and they're constant entertainment.

SKELETONS
May 8, 2014
This one cracked me up. These are all great, though.
http://emailsfromthedccc.tumblr.com/post/93525226237

Willa Rogers
Mar 11, 2005

This one's real, but reads like a parody:

quote:

Manny --

Lately my kids have been asking if they can dress our dogs up for Halloween. I can't blame them, either. I mean, wouldn't Demmy look good as a superhero?

Unfortunately, (or fortunately for Demmy, who doesn't want to wear a costume) Democrats don't have much time for an extended Halloween celebration this year. This election is going to be a close one until the very last second. We're neck-and-neck in important races in states like Wisconsin and Georgia, and we need to make sure we finish strong.

So Manny, will you chip in $3 or more right now?

If you donate $200 today, you'll be on the list of our best supporters we send to the FEC. If you've saved your payment information, your donation will go through immediately.

...


Thanks, Manny -- from Demmy and me both!

Debbie

Debbie Wasserman Schultz
Chair
Democratic National Committee

SKELETONS
May 8, 2014
I wonder what the republican ones are like, or is their small donor base not big enough? Does the RNC ask for $3 donations?

gradenko_2000
Oct 5, 2010

HELL SERPENT
Lipstick Apathy

It was racist against blacks to ban them from attending Alabama's state university.

It's racist against whites to not-ban blacks from entering the US, because they're carrying Ebola into the country.

SnakePlissken
Dec 31, 2009

by zen death robot

Joementum posted:

Gohmert of the day, "I've had people say, 'Hey, you know, there's nothing wrong with gays in the military. Look at the Greeks,' Well, you know, they did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle. But you know what, it's a different kind of fighting, it's a different kind of war and if you're sitting around getting massages all day ready to go into a big, planned battle, then you're not going to last very long. It's guerrilla fighting. You are going to be ultimately vulnerable to terrorism and if that's what you start doing in the military like the Greeks did ... as people have said, 'Louie, you have got to understand, you don't even know your history.' Oh yes I do. I know exactly. It's not a good idea."

This is a rich tapestry of wrongness. Now imagine the above quote in an Xtacles voice.

ReindeerF
Apr 20, 2002

Rubber Dinghy Rapids Bro

SKELETONS posted:

I wonder what the republican ones are like, or is their small donor base not big enough? Does the RNC ask for $3 donations?
Note how the Democratic tactic doesn't sit well with the GOP base either, heh:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/evanmcsan/young-republicans-outraged-by-rncs-did-you-abandon-the-gop-f

Traditionally they're all fear-based. Direct Mail in politics was pioneered by Richard Vigurie on the right and Morris Dees on the left and they both found the formula pretty quickly. Images that cause strong emotions coupled with scary headlines and fear-mongering. Of course Morris Dees used the money to battle the Klan into obsolescence in court, so he's got a little moral superiority there, heh.

Grab a stock photo of Pelosi baring her teeth, amp up the saturation to make her looked older and meaner, write a headline about amnesty for illegals and then toss in some copy about jobs and ebola and ISIS and, bam, money rolls in.

Silver2195
Apr 4, 2012

Gaussian posted:

So a guy I know from high school just commented on this article about voter ID laws. His comments were:
1. "...never been in a bar, never picked up baseball tickets at the will call window, never bought cigarettes..."
2. "...never purchased cold medicine, never opened a bank account, never applied for a loan, never donated blood, never applied for unemployment or other government assistance, never got a hunting/fishing license..."
3. "This would be a great sociological experiment. Find a human being who would actually be disenfranchised by a voter ID law. Coincidentally, you would also be finding someone who isn't living in the twenty-first (hell, the twentieth) century.

Maybe that dude from the TV show Sleepy Hollow who suddenly woke up in 2013 after succumbing to a magical sleep in the late 1700s? He would definitely be disenfranchised."

I know I might be touching the poop, but should I even respond to this and if so, how?

I'm pretty sure my grandmother doesn't have an ID and hasn't done any of those things.

Does your friend know any old people?

PERMACAV 50
Jul 24, 2007

because we are cat
Forget old people, that describes a significant chunk of people over 18 but under 21.

On Terra Firma
Feb 12, 2008

Joementum posted:

Gohmert of the day, "I've had people say, 'Hey, you know, there's nothing wrong with gays in the military. Look at the Greeks,' Well, you know, they did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle. But you know what, it's a different kind of fighting, it's a different kind of war and if you're sitting around getting massages all day ready to go into a big, planned battle, then you're not going to last very long. It's guerrilla fighting. You are going to be ultimately vulnerable to terrorism and if that's what you start doing in the military like the Greeks did ... as people have said, 'Louie, you have got to understand, you don't even know your history.' Oh yes I do. I know exactly. It's not a good idea."



This is so incredible.

The Insect Court
Nov 22, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

Silver2195 posted:

I'm pretty sure my grandmother doesn't have an ID and hasn't done any of those things.

Does your friend know any old people?

There are various newspaper stories about individuals who would be disenfranchised by voter id requirements, and they're usually sympathetic old ladies, but the better argument is to point out that the sort of in-person voter fraud that voter id laws are supposedly meant to prevent effectively do not exist. I think a lot of sympathy for the idea of voter id laws comes from the reflexive belief that Republicans wouldn't be pushing these things if there wasn't at least some problem here.

Insisting that voter id laws are harmless are a little like suggesting that everybody who votes is required to show up at the polls with a T-bone steak in their pocket, so that in the event of a wolf attack on the polls they can distract the wolves with the steak. Because it's not like it's that difficult getting your hands on a steak. And what are you, pro-wolf?

max4me
Jun 15, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
You also point out that DL are not proof of voter eligibility, or even citizenship. That would be the domain of birth certificates and passports. My 96 old aunt stop driving so her DL just lapsed now she wouldnt be able to vote.


Also ID's are not free. Thus you have to pay to be able to vote a sorta poll tax.

Finally whats to stop someone from commenting fraud by use of mail in ballots?

Alec Bald Snatch
Sep 12, 2012

by exmarx

Gaussian posted:


I know I might be touching the poop, but should I even respond to this and if so, how?

You agree, a national photo ID card which doubles as a DL and passport should be available to everyone free of charge and the FICA cap should be removed and cap gains taxed at the normal income rate to pay for it. As LBJ taught us, the trick is to whip out your cock to show dominance.

Sulphagnist
Oct 10, 2006

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED

You can't have a national ID card act as a passport, you need pages for visas and stamps. Also passports need to be biometric these days and a national ID card would be enough of a tough sell without taking everyone's fingerprints on top of it.

Oh wait you were being facetious.

Besides they'd just come up with some other kind of suppression. I mean you have the VRA and they simply came up with the ID stuff to get around it.

Shbobdb
Dec 16, 2010

by Reene
A national ID card? I think I know what that means! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lknW2mzXMMY

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Antti posted:

You can't have a national ID card act as a passport, you need pages for visas and stamps. Also passports need to be biometric these days and a national ID card would be enough of a tough sell without taking everyone's fingerprints on top of it.

I've got a passport card in my wallet. You can get one too from the State Department for $60.

Sulphagnist
Oct 10, 2006

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED

Joementum posted:

I've got a passport card in my wallet. You can get one too from the State Department for $60.

You sure can! And it's only valid for travel between countries the US has made an agreement with to accept it as a travel document, similar to national IDs being valid travel documents within the Schengen area. But it's not a passport.

Edit: I sperg about this sort of thing for a living, I didn't mean to come across like an rear end in a top hat if I did.

Sulphagnist fucked around with this message at 10:23 on Oct 23, 2014

max4me
Jun 15, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
What kinda job pays you to sperg about travel ID's

Sulphagnist
Oct 10, 2006

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED

max4me posted:

What kinda job pays you to sperg about travel ID's

Government. It involves among other things establishing a person's travel history and period of stay in the country, and of course their identity.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
Well, if we're going to sperg out about this, you did say...

Antti posted:

You can't have a national ID card act as a passport

And the passport card is certainly a card acting as a passport to those countries where the US has agreements. :v:

I'm also going to guess that it's an acceptable form of ID for voting purposes in those jurisdictions where such things are required.

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Joementum posted:

I'm also going to guess that it's an acceptable form of ID for voting purposes in those jurisdictions where such things are required.

How often, I wonder, would you get turned away by someone who didn't recognize it?

Sulphagnist
Oct 10, 2006

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED

Joementum posted:

Well, if we're going to sperg out about this, you did say...


And the passport card is certainly a card acting as a passport to those countries where the US has agreements. :v:

I'm also going to guess that it's an acceptable form of ID for voting purposes in those jurisdictions where such things are required.

Well we call it a "travel document" when it's a not-really-a-passport but this is a dumb derail.

Regardless the passport card is bona fide ID within the US so yes you should be able to vote with it. You might not be able to vote in EU elections with it (if you are living in an EU country), though!

The problem with the passport card as voting ID is though that it doesn't mention your place of residence. So I'd imagine you'll still need a utility bill or something like that. Most American DLs I've seen have the owner's address.

That always struck me as a little dumb, you just apply for a new one whenever you move?, over here it's solved by having a national population register that keeps track of where everyone is domiciled.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Antti posted:

Most American DLs I've seen have the owner's address.

That always struck me as a little dumb, you just apply for a new one whenever you move?, over here it's solved by having a national population register that keeps track of where everyone is domiciled.

You can go to the DMV and pay to get a new one if you change addresses. Most people just wait for their current one to expire. That's managed by the state. The voting roll is typically managed by the municipality, so you have to go to the town/city clerk to let them know you've changed addresses. You then have to separately notify the federal agency that tracks your address, the postal service, if you want to keep getting mail.

Federalism is a great system!

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Joementum posted:

You can go to the DMV and pay to get a new one if you change addresses. Most people just wait for their current one to expire. That's managed by the state. The voting roll is typically managed by the municipality, so you have to go to the town/city clerk to let them know you've changed addresses. You then have to separately notify the federal agency that tracks your address, the postal service, if you want to keep getting mail.

Federalism is a great system!

At least in Oregon, voter registration is done at the state level, but they keep a separate database than the DMV, so if you move you have to go tell two different state agencies your new address.

Sulphagnist
Oct 10, 2006

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED

If I move in Finland, I go to the internet, fill out one form, use my internet banking codes to confirm my identity, and it goes to the national post office and the aforementioned system. If you do it more than three months before an election you vote in your new district. All the big banks and companies get their address information from the system too, with your consent. When I was a student and moved once every two years it was a godsend.

(Students here move a lot since first you rent whatever apartment you can get your hands on once you enrol, then progressively better and/or cheaper places as you work on the side or queue for them.)

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Antti posted:

If I move in Finland, I go to the internet, fill out one form, use my internet banking codes to confirm my identity, and it goes to the national post office and the aforementioned system. If you do it more than three months before an election you vote in your new district. All the big banks and companies get their address information from the system too, with your consent. When I was a student and moved once every two years it was a godsend.

Sounds like Orwellian Commie-Fascism to me. I didn't watch my buddies on TV die face down on the beaches of Grenada fighting against that sort of thing to let it creep in here :bahgawd:

Sulphagnist
Oct 10, 2006

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED

Well I just admitted I work for said Orwellian Commie-Fascist government so what do I know?

Stunning Honky
Sep 7, 2004

" . . . "

Joementum posted:

I think I saw a documentary on this subject once, involving beach volleyball.

ReindeerF
Apr 20, 2002

Rubber Dinghy Rapids Bro
The thing I loved about Bush at the beach volleyball was that he was legitimately into it and not at all being lecherous. He was like Little League Dad, heh.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
In other news, the office of Bernie Sanders has confirmed that he will never caucus with the Republicans.

So, in case you were worried about that, you're an idiot, but you don't need to worry any more.

Grand Theft Autobot
Feb 28, 2008

I'm something of a fucking idiot myself

Gaussian posted:

So a guy I know from high school just commented on this article about voter ID laws. His comments were:
1. "...never been in a bar, never picked up baseball tickets at the will call window, never bought cigarettes..."
2. "...never purchased cold medicine, never opened a bank account, never applied for a loan, never donated blood, never applied for unemployment or other government assistance, never got a hunting/fishing license..."
3. "This would be a great sociological experiment. Find a human being who would actually be disenfranchised by a voter ID law. Coincidentally, you would also be finding someone who isn't living in the twenty-first (hell, the twentieth) century.

Maybe that dude from the TV show Sleepy Hollow who suddenly woke up in 2013 after succumbing to a magical sleep in the late 1700s? He would definitely be disenfranchised."

I know I might be touching the poop, but should I even respond to this and if so, how?

Ask him how many convictions for voter fraud there have been nationwide since 2004. In Minnesota, there have been 350, and essentially all of them have been for felons who believed their rights had been restored when they had not been, not the kind of voter fraud most people are thinking about.

Generally, there is no such thing as "voter fraud," so why should we expend so much money to enforce Voter ID? It costs money to implement the electronic system, operate it, and train the volunteers, and it makes counting the votes more time consuming, and generally makes the voting process more cumbersome.

Stultus Maximus
Dec 21, 2009

USPOL May

Joementum posted:

In other news, the office of Bernie Sanders has confirmed that he will never caucus with the Republicans.

So, in case you were worried about that, you're an idiot, but you don't need to worry any more.

Last night I dreamed that a dozen independents got elected somehow and decided to caucus together, denying anyone a true majority.
I really need to stop reading political news.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
Suicide? More like Obamacide, according to Rep. Don Young (R-AK).

quote:

Asked about the “lack of support” comment, Young expanded on it and added that suicide in Alaska didn’t exist before “government largesse” gave residents an entitlement mentality, according to an audio recording of his senior center appearance.

I just can't go on knowing that there's a federal bureaucracy! *shoots self*

raindrop
Oct 11, 2014

Antti posted:

Regardless the passport card is bona fide ID within the US so yes you should be able to vote with it. You might not be able to vote in EU elections with it (if you are living in an EU country), though!

The problem with the passport card as voting ID is though that it doesn't mention your place of residence. So I'd imagine you'll still need a utility bill or something like that. Most American DLs I've seen have the owner's address.

A valid passport is accepted ID for voting in the US now; there's no need to produce something that shows your address as well. The ID is only to show that you are who you are claiming to be.

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

raindrop posted:

A valid passport is accepted ID for voting in the US now; there's no need to produce something that shows your address as well. The ID is only to show that you are who you are claiming to be.

I imagine that would vary based on state. In Texas you definitely need an address as well.

raindrop
Oct 11, 2014

computer parts posted:

I imagine that would vary based on state. In Texas you definitely need an address as well.

Is that just for when you register or for every time you vote?

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

raindrop posted:

Is that just for when you register or for every time you vote?

Last time I voted they asked me my address to confirm that it was the same as on my Driver's License.

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Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
A passport is one of the seven valid forms of ID in Texas, along with a concealed carry permit, because of course.

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