Schadenfreude thread: It's all fun and games 'till someone gets upset

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > Schadenfreude thread: It's all fun and games 'till someone gets upset

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Effectronica: May 31, 2011; Fallen Rib

# ? Oct 31, 2014 14:31

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 21:53

CJacobs: Apr 17, 2011; Reach for the moon!

jeebus bob posted:

More like the parent who decided to try out that toy (which I can't imagine the kid would be able to operate) in the middle of the road is an irresponsible moron.

Wasabi the J posted:

Or it's fake

These are both also plausible.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 14:34

FogHelmut: Dec 18, 2003

Jombo posted:

I was reminded of this by the flying barbie into fireplace gif so...

This is pre-everyone having a camera phone schadenfreude so imagination is required.

One year back in the 80's this was the tickle-me-elmo of toys:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJa6eUpxNyM

and all us 6 year olds were cracking wood everytime the ad came on tv during tmnt or some poo poo.

Anyway one of my good friends has a birthday the day after mine, and at his party he gets a TYPHOON! the most kickingest raddest piece of awesome the 1980s has to offer. Being quite poor myself I'd received socks or some poo poo for my birthday the day before and I must admit I was more than a little jealous.

Being the cutting edge of technology in an amazing age where calculator watches were replacing C64s as the shining example of human technological prowess the TYPHOON! came with rechargeable batteries instead of those old disposable D cells used by stoneage remote controlled vehicles. So the TYPHOON! goes straight from box to the charger while everyone dances around giddy with excitement about the torrent of fun about to be unleashed. After everyone couldn't hold it in any longer (probably 10 mins) the birthday boy rips the TYPHOON! from the charger and we all run straight to the best and only place to test out a toy as amazing as the TYPHOON! - the closest dam (we were on a farm you see). The birthday boy starts up the amazing machine and it really works! just like on the commercial! So straight out onto the water it goes, tearing around like a jesus boat walking on water, straight to the furthest part from the shore... when we start to hear the little electric motors spluttering - no longer did that nice high pitched whirr emanate from the fans. The astounding impatience we had displayed made us unworthy of the machine, and great forces were about to punish us for our hubris. Befitting its name and reputation the TYPHOON! appeared to put up a valiant struggle against the murky brown water as everyone on the shore stared on in silence, but after around 15 seconds and the last of the air leaking from it's skirt the machine disappeared below the surface along with its dead flat battery, as if it was just too perfect and not meant for this world. 30 seconds to bathe in its glow from start to finish were all we were afforded.

Amazingly my jealousy was gone - completely replaced by the sadness the this beautiful machine was gone, probably the only one for hundreds of kilometres in any direction, and never to brighten up this forgotten and neglected part of the Australian outback ever again.

Of course immediate petition was made to the adults in the area - surely something could be done. But the metre thick, sticky mud all around the dam made it a veritable death trap. The remainder of the party was merely the slow realisation over several hours that the TYPHOON! was really gone... but had we ever really had it? Were we delusional and only hallucinated the events due to overwhelming marketing and sugary food? No, the empty box and charger remained - as a physical reminder of the disaster that had just happened.

5 months later it was the height of summer, and the dam in question dried enough for the machine to be recovered. It was a shell of it's former self, as if all the fun and 80's style kickin' rad had vanished - leaving behind only a mud crusted piece of plastic.

I had one of these and it did float when the battery died, dunno man.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 14:43

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

FogHelmut posted:

I had one of these and it did float when the battery died, dunno man.

I had it too. I was obsessed with getting it, but it didn't live up to the hype. Anyway, that story is bullshit. Of course it didn't sink when the battery was dead.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 14:46

Jombo: Feb 20, 2009

Leon Einstein posted:

I had it too. I was obsessed with getting it, but it didn't live up to the hype. Anyway, that story is bullshit. Of course it didn't sink when the battery was dead.

I assure you with as much credibility of a random guy on the internet has. That incident has been a laughing point amongst my school friends for 25 years and the crucial plot point would be hard to mistake.

Maybe it only sinks in Australia - like the toilet flushing thing

# ? Oct 31, 2014 15:34

Indolent Bastard: Oct 26, 2007; I WON THIS AMAZING AVATAR! I'M A WINNER! WOOOOO!

Jombo posted:

I assure you with as much credibility of a random guy on the internet has. That incident has been a laughing point amongst my school friends for 25 years and the crucial plot point would be hard to mistake.

Maybe it only sinks in Australia - like the toilet flushing thing

Which isn't true either.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 15:41

Jombo: Feb 20, 2009

Indolent Bastard posted:

Which isn't true either.

:facepalm:

# ? Oct 31, 2014 16:06

Deteriorata: Feb 6, 2005

Jombo posted:

I assure you with as much credibility of a random guy on the internet has. That incident has been a laughing point amongst my school friends for 25 years and the crucial plot point would be hard to mistake.

Maybe it only sinks in Australia - like the toilet flushing thing

Maybe Tyco made special extra-heavy ones just to gently caress with Australian kids. They've been laughing about it at their corporate offices for 25 years.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 16:11

Tiggum: Oct 24, 2007; Your life and your quest end here.

Merijn posted:

Twice I owned RC vehicles in my childhood, and twice was I disappointed in the lack of cool factor. They only seemed to be cool if you were willing to rough them up to the point where they'd only last a week, tops.

That's perfectly fine though, because they're really only fun for about as long as it takes to damage them. You can get some extra fun out of them if you only have one set of batteries and have to wait to recharge between uses (especially if you only have a slow charger and have to wait till the next day like I did), but like any toy, they get boring once you've played with them too much.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 17:03

Bhodi: Dec 9, 2007; Oh, it's just a cat.; Pillbug

I had one of those and it absolutely did float, albeit with most of the thing under water. It really wasn't made to get wet, the battery compartment wasn't very well insulated. I ended up playing with it mostly on a concrete slab, where it worked well. The street was too gravely for it to work too well and it would tear up the skirt. I stuck it in the bathtub once just to test the 'on water' thing but never went to a lake.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 17:19

FogHelmut: Dec 18, 2003

The battery barely lasted anyway, and if you took it on an actual lake you could go out of range pretty quickly. And then what? Find a boat or hope for some good wind.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 17:24

Bhodi: Dec 9, 2007; Oh, it's just a cat.; Pillbug

Say what you want, that thing was way better than the magazine ads for the go-cart sized hovercraft (plans only of course) that I also bought and sent away for because I was a sucker.

It was never built, obviously.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 17:29

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Bhodi posted:

I had one of those and it absolutely did float, albeit with most of the thing under water. It really wasn't made to get wet, the battery compartment wasn't very well insulated. I ended up playing with it mostly on a concrete slab, where it worked well. The street was too gravely for it to work too well and it would tear up the skirt. I stuck it in the bathtub once just to test the 'on water' thing but never went to a lake.

The story doesn't seem that implausible then, especially since he said it didn't go under immediately. Manufacturing or assembly defect lets excess water in, gets caught in an eddy and gets swamped, angry river god smites child of man for his hubris, etc.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 18:21

Triarii: Jun 14, 2003

Tiggum posted:

That's perfectly fine though, because they're really only fun for about as long as it takes to damage them. You can get some extra fun out of them if you only have one set of batteries and have to wait to recharge between uses (especially if you only have a slow charger and have to wait till the next day like I did), but like any toy, they get boring once you've played with them too much.

Man, half the fun of an RC car is figuring out how to zip tie and duct tape together all the battle damage you've taken from launching off sick ramps all day.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 18:29

Naganted: Jul 22, 2007; Indistinct Gibberish.; Toilet Rascal

Triarii posted:

Man, half the fun of an RC car is figuring out how to zip tie and duct tape together all the battle damage you've taken from launching off sick ramps all day.

This man speaks the truth. I had a Fast Traxx or whatever the hell that they were called, and before it was 'retired' the thing looked like something Mad Max would of been proud of. Guess the schadenfreude would be that I had it ever since I was 11, did all sorts of weird stunts with it, and it only acquired mostly structural damage. After much begging when my 5 year old son at the time managed to dig it out from who knows where in my place, I let him play with it. 3 minutes later it's missing a wheel, the tracks are ripped off, he's pulled the body off, and the cat is now mortified to step into the house.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 20:15

Hillridge: Aug 3, 2004; WWheeeeeee!

I still have that hovercraft somewhere at my parents house. I'm going to dig it out next time I'm home and retro fit it with Li-ion batteries, then probably sink it on the pond nearby.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 20:25

ol qwerty bastard: Dec 13, 2005; If you want something done, do it yourself!

FailArmy's on a roll; they've already got fails of the month up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8iDv5rALnk

# ? Oct 31, 2014 20:39

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

ahahha those parts of the cat video, here it is in full:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjmaNSM3Sdw

"if you have kids, especially bad kids, you should let him play with them"

# ? Oct 31, 2014 20:50

ninjahedgehog: Feb 17, 2011; It's time to kick the tires and light the fires, Big Bird.

ol qwerty bastard posted:

FailArmy's on a roll; they've already got fails of the month up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8iDv5rALnk

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Post Your Favorite (or Request) > Schadenfreude thread: Sorry about your cock, man

# ? Oct 31, 2014 21:35

Scarf: Jun 24, 2005; On sight

ol qwerty bastard posted:

FailArmy's on a roll; they've already got fails of the month up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8iDv5rALnk

The guy continuously passing out from fear at the end is fantastic.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 21:41

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

Palpek posted:

ahahha those parts of the cat video, here it is in full:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjmaNSM3Sdw

"if you have kids, especially bad kids, you should let him play with them"

That cat owns.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 21:53

The Midniter: Jul 9, 2001

ol qwerty bastard posted:

FailArmy's on a roll; they've already got fails of the month up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8iDv5rALnk

I love the dude who pulled a Robert Baratheon.

Also, why wouldn't the woman with the bigass titties just slap the gently caress out of that cat that kept biting her? Shooing it away obviously wasn't doing anything.

# ? Oct 31, 2014 21:56

Handsome Ralph: Sep 3, 2004; Oh boy, posting!
That's where I'm a Viking!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yJqqdinF0M

No one spoil this for me, I don't care if it's fake or not. :allears:

# ? Nov 2, 2014 18:58

booshi: Aug 14, 2004; ||||||||||

Handsome Ralph posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yJqqdinF0M

No one spoil this for me, I don't care if it's fake or not.

America's Team!

Doubt it's fake, looks/sounds like a Cowboys fan to me.

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:19

VanSandman: Feb 16, 2011; SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER

If it's fake, that's a hell of a lot of property damage for something fake. Love the way the counter comes right off - very much a cheap McMansion, I'm guessing.

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:26

Robot Randy: Dec 31, 2011; by Lowtax

VanSandman posted:

If it's fake, that's a hell of a lot of property damage for something fake. Love the way the counter comes right off - very much a cheap McMansion, I'm guessing.

looks exactly like housing built exactly for that type of student

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:36

skylined!: Apr 6, 2012; THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

Handsome Ralph posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yJqqdinF0M

No one spoil this for me, I don't care if it's fake or not.

Where's the fish? Where's the fish? I'm gonna bite its loving head off! AHhHHH!!! :supaburn:

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:50

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Handsome Ralph posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yJqqdinF0M

No one spoil this for me, I don't care if it's fake or not.

What a loving manchild, Jesus. I have family who is serious sports fans but this is batshit.

I am willing to bet other than football there is absolutely nothing in this dude's life he is equally as passionate about. Like he would miss the birth of his own child (if he ever had sex) for a football game.

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:52

Hulebr00670065006e: Apr 20, 2010

13Pandora13 posted:

What a loving manchild, Jesus. I have family who is serious sports fans but this is batshit.

I am willing to bet other than football there is absolutely nothing in this dude's life he is equally as passionate about. Like he would miss the birth of his own child (if he ever had sex) for a football game.

he could have all his money on the game

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:55

The Door Frame: Dec 5, 2011; I don't know man everytime I go to the gym here there are like two huge dudes with raging high and tights snorting Nitro-tech off of each other's rock hard abs.

Hulebr00670065006e posted:

he could have all his money on the game

Then it's probably not wise to cause thousands of dollars worth of damages if he lost all his money :v:

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:56

Io_: Oct 15, 2012; woo woo; Pillbug

The Door Frame posted:

Then it's probably not wise to cause thousands of dollars worth of damages if he lost all his money

Judging by how easy it was to tear down probably more like tens of dollars :eng101:

# ? Nov 2, 2014 20:59

Double Bill: Jan 29, 2006

ol qwerty bastard posted:

FailArmy's on a roll; they've already got fails of the month up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8iDv5rALnk

Those poor guitars

# ? Nov 2, 2014 21:00

Stick Figure Mafia: Dec 11, 2004

Ragequit posted:

Not exactly scooden'n'froody, but it sure is something:

Guy has bike stolen and reacts oddly:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUHrjyewJBQ

This is a common thing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZR4RdCBlOw

# ? Nov 2, 2014 21:42

Bip Roberts: Mar 29, 2005

Palpek posted:

ahahha those parts of the cat video, here it is in full:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjmaNSM3Sdw

"if you have kids, especially bad kids, you should let him play with them"

Jeez, just take your broken cat to the shelter if you don't want to kill it yourself.

# ? Nov 2, 2014 22:20

The Door Frame: Dec 5, 2011; I don't know man everytime I go to the gym here there are like two huge dudes with raging high and tights snorting Nitro-tech off of each other's rock hard abs.

BigFatFlyingBloke posted:

Judging by how easy it was to tear down probably more like tens of dollars

That counter did look like it was made out of load bearing dry wall....

# ? Nov 2, 2014 22:30

Tiny: Oct 26, 2003; My leg hurts....

Stick Figure Mafia posted:

This is a common thing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZR4RdCBlOw

Jesus H Christ either call the cops or punch him in the face and take your property back. The schadenfreude here is that someone, somewhere, has this poor bastard's balls in a glass jar just when he needs them.

# ? Nov 2, 2014 23:17