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Well, you know, sucking at something is the first step to being sort of okay at something.
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Sep 9, 2014 09:54
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I've been admitting and doing that first step for my entire life. I don't even know what the second step is. Now, in this bonus video, I speedrun Dark Summit. That's basically it. How fast can it be completed? 4 hours? 3 hours? Maybe 50 minutes? Dark Summit WORLD RECORD speedrun in 51:52 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xw5eEvm3n8 I should probably have more to say, but look at it! I beat it in an hour! Sure, none of these games are that long, but there are no races to play over and over or trick events to score big points on. That's it! I mean, there are a bunch of other missions I didn't do but they're all just riding around and doing random things. Nothing to collect except special tricks and little equipment point boosts. That, right there, is Dark Summit.
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Sep 11, 2014 21:00
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One more Dark Summit thing. It's another retsupurae. While this source video might not have any big defining problems, there are so many new little things that show up throughout that the confusion never quite flattens out. After this, there might be a few Let's Not Plays. I'm actually running out of games I have on hand to do. I need to get more. 'Dark' 'Summit' 'Gameplay'.wmv  Text Link
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Sep 17, 2014 22:48
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Welp, that was a thing. I think the best part was your reaction to the abrupt, random end of the video. And the impromptu Niko Bellic impressions. And apparently the coining of the new meme "Bombs are heaven!".
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Sep 19, 2014 03:14
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Glad someone finally likes my impressions! Man, there's no love around here when it comes to that. Alright. Like I said, I set out to do a Let's NOT Play and ended up recording 3-4 videos worth of material on this awful game. Thus, let's begin the SnoCross 2 Saga. Let's NOT Play SnoCross 2  What is this game? Snocross 2 is a 2006 snowboarding game developed and published by Crave. Yep, Crave. Yep, 2006. It is garbage. Everything is garbage. The riding is bad. The ricks are bad. They say there are 33 unique environments, but...well...that's such a big lie, that will be one of the things covered in another video. For now, let's get to the original, main recording, where blanktester and I went in blind, found ourselves stunned, found ourselves easily getting gold, and found out that the custom track editor may actually be able to produce tracks on par with the ones the developers made. SnoCross 2 Main Video (1/2)  Text Link
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Sep 21, 2014 21:20
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Death by Sno Sno  You sure you didn't swap the console for a PS1?
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Sep 21, 2014 22:17
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SelenicMartian posted:Death by Sno Sno Nope. Thank Crave, everyone, for their continued work at really pushing the boundaries of what these game consoles can do. Now, on to part 2. In this part, I go bowling and blanktester makes a few custom maps. It doesn't sound like that could stretch across the whole video, but when a lap on any of these tracks takes three minutes, and when we get mesmerized by the AI pathing, that can extend things. After this, we the live recording, but a few other situations caused us to pick it up ajnd play some more. Stay tuned for the next part of SnoCross 2. SnoCross 2 Main Video (2/2)  Text link
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Sep 26, 2014 21:50
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That was the laziest (and only) implementation of bowling in a snowboarding-ish game I've ever seen, but the multiplayer exclusion made (some) sense; has there ever been a bowling game where two or more players could bowl simultaneously on the same screen? Also, judging by the bonus clip at the end, maybe the AI wasn't having trouble going in a straight line - maybe it was trying to ascend to a higher plane, or at least go outside the game's boundaries and geometry in general. It's saying a lot about the game's quality when its own AI is actively trying to escape its clutches.
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Sep 28, 2014 12:39
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Daigerus posted:That was the laziest (and only) implementation of bowling in a snowboarding-ish game I've ever seen, but the multiplayer exclusion made (some) sense; has there ever been a bowling game where two or more players could bowl simultaneously on the same screen? Also, judging by the bonus clip at the end, maybe the AI wasn't having trouble going in a straight line - maybe it was trying to ascend to a higher plane, or at least go outside the game's boundaries and geometry in general. The AI? You want to talk about the AI? Snocross 2 Bonus: AI Racers vs. Themselves  Text Link SnoCross 2 might just have the worst AI I have ever seen in a racing game. This AI is slow, pitiful, crashes on random junk, and often gets stuck in corners for a good long while. In the video above, you will see that I am not joking about any of that. I do a five-lap race on one of the thirty two environments UHH I mean eight environments - one which the AI has a lot of trouble on. Especially when there is a shortcut that you straight up cannot access without resetting your guy into it, and the AI likes to try to take that shortcut. We end the series on this cold, cold game with what is basically watching the heat death of the Snocross 2 universe. Don't believe me? Watch the video, or look at some of these sensational gifs pulled from the video.    
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Oct 1, 2014 22:38
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This AI brings taking damage to save time to a whole new level.
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Oct 2, 2014 18:41
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I broke down laughing so many times at those AI follies.
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Oct 6, 2014 02:27
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SelenicMartian posted:This AI brings taking damage to save time to a whole new level. They're not even saving time 99% of the time. Also, I think they were already damaged before the game even began, so they got that part down, at least. Insetik on YouTube posted:In this video, we discover that the AI racers' biggest enemy is actually themselves. And the tracks. And everything, really. You (or at least the player avatar) are probably the closest thing they have as a friend, chronicling their struggles and their triumphs as a testament to all broken AI everywhere, but mostly their struggles.
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Oct 7, 2014 03:11
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By the way Ovues, are you planning on doing the Free Running game on the PS2 at some point? I've been playing it and the core gameplay is pretty fun and interesting even with the sluggish controls and the fact that the Video Gallery is literally broken to the extent that it bluescreens the PS2...
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Oct 9, 2014 05:28
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BioEnchanted posted:By the way Ovues, are you planning on doing the Free Running game on the PS2 at some point? I've been playing it and the core gameplay is pretty fun and interesting even with the sluggish controls and the fact that the Video Gallery is literally broken to the extent that it bluescreens the PS2... I keep forgetting about this game. I don't think I've seen it at the ol' game store, but I can check again or order online. And...uhh...to that last part, wow. That is certainly something. So blanktester and I will be doing a few more Let's NOT Play simply due to the fact that I don't have much time to start an actual game ( and I'm trying to get another block of games set up on the one console we don't own). Digging through what we had, we stumbled upon a real Indiana Jones-like-moment. Our old roommate had given us a few cheap PS1 games to maybe do for the series. One of them was Snocross 1. After the debacle that was the second one, we knew we had to try this one out. Sequels aren't always better: Let's NOT Play SnoCross 1 [img]http://lpix.org/1823169/Sno Cross Championship Racing [U] [SLUS-01093]-front.jpg[/img] What is this game? SnoCross Championship Racing is where the SnoCross series really began. It was released on the PS1 to very average reviews. Still, after seeing its trainwreck of a sequel, we were curious to see if we could have seen any of it coming. The answer, surprisingly, is probably no. SnoCross 1 is a whole different game - one that is very averagely okay. If only it had been built on instead of discarded to the side. Watch in part 1 as we get a feel for the game's races and discover the one thing I was meant to be doing all along - hill climb. Let's NOT Play Snocross 1 (1/2)  Text Link Insetik fucked around with this message at 21:49 on Oct 13, 2014 |
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Oct 10, 2014 01:11
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SelenicMartian posted:This AI brings taking damage to save time to a whole new level. The next Let's Not Play after SnoCross does not damage boost at all. As in, if you aren't perfect, gently caress right off. It's been a while since I've checked the thread, to be perfectly honest, but just so you guys know: We got our hands on a few Original Xbox titles and Beardha (Grant) is lending us his Xbox, so we're gonna organize a small block of those. That said, we still have a few Let's Not Plays to do. I'll look into the game(s) that you guys suggested in the thread as well. Truth be told, I literally had a nightmare about the next Let's Not Play game.
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Oct 12, 2014 00:32
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blanktester posted:
 You guys remember what Snocross 2 did poorly? The map maker. You guys want to know what Snocross 1 does fairly well? The map maker! Today, blaktester makes something that isn't complete poo poo in part 2 of Let's NOT Play Snocross 1. Let's NOT Play Snocross 1 (2/2)  Text Link
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Oct 13, 2014 21:51
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Every extreme sports game should have seat spanking.
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Oct 14, 2014 07:58
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Now I'm curious as to what happens when you get all the parts of your snocross red - do you get a glorious explosion?
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Oct 14, 2014 22:25
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Daigerus posted:Now I'm curious as to what happens when you get all the parts of your snocross red - do you get a glorious explosion? Prrrooooooobably not. That seems way too extreme for what that game was doing. Also, in that one night track, my left rudder was dangerously close to failing while the rest of my snowmobile was fine. I think one part would definitely give first, and I have a feeling those parts breaking would just end your run right there. Now, originally blanktester and I set out to do a short video on another Crave PS1 game. If you watched my stream during the 5 Day Replay, we tried to play this only to find the Elgato just wouldn't let us. Still, we kept it in the back of our minds, and finally it is time to bust it out. What started as a single-shot game became a full-on Let's Play when we accidentally beat the game in an hour. A ten year old Will Ferrell stars in X-Bladez (of glory)  What is this game? X-Bladez is another PS1 sports game published by Crave. If you liked watching the Razor Scooter games, you will like watching this, because it's basically the same thing. There are six levels that you first trick down to 'qualify', and then a race event. The tricking system blows, and the racing AI tries its best to take you out. So...par for the course. X-Bladez Part 1: failurereel.mp4  Text Link
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Oct 17, 2014 17:19
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Good grief that looks painful. Although X-Blades is a title that never brings much promise. Even with a Z. Youtube's list of recommendations for this video is based entirely on "accidentally" in the title. quote:RCT3 | Let's Play 2014 | Episode 6 | Accidentally Deleted 
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Oct 17, 2014 20:01
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SelenicMartian posted:Good grief that looks painful. Although X-Blades is a title that never brings much promise. Even with a Z. What? It happens all the time, man. That "delete" button is just so big and so in the way. And yeah, I worried that no one would see X-Bladez because of X-Blades. I'll assume this is a game you guys will see and no one else will. X-Blades was pretty bad as well, though. Some guy did it in this forum a while back, and I saw a few videos.
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Oct 17, 2014 20:18
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Speaking of, let's just go and charge through the rest of the game. Rather, charge through all of the placing events and about half the races. The other half of the race require you to play perfectly or watch your ability to move on just...slip away. But I didn't slip away. No. I beat all SIX COURSES. And next time, we're getting some motherfucking monkey tokens... X-Bladez Part 2: Special tricks and speed boosts  Text Link
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Oct 22, 2014 00:34
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I hope that giant robot makes an appearance soon, since the manual went out of its way to mention him. But wow, that camera was just plain sadistic and/or lazy. What do the wheel tokens do anyway?
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Oct 25, 2014 01:38
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Daigerus posted:I hope that giant robot makes an appearance soon, since the manual went out of its way to mention him. But wow, that camera was just plain sadistic and/or lazy. What do the wheel tokens do anyway? Monkey tokens show up in the tricking events. They ultimately get you bonus levels if you collect all of them in each level. You have to get all the tokens in a level withing one run of the level. Wheel tokens in the racing events are the same way, but they get you bonus characters. We don't care about the rest of Kevin's rad crew. At all. And that robot... Well, he might end up a little different in person.
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Oct 25, 2014 10:12
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Finally, let's round our our short trip down rollerblading lane. We go back and get all those monkey tokens because we absolutely HAVE TO SEE if we'll actually get anything for our efforts, or if the game will just be too incompetent to have a reward. Spoilers below! the tracks are kind of neat, I guess X-Bladez Part 3: The quest for bonus content  Text Link Alright, well, thank you guys for staying with me while I messed around and didn't really commit to doing a full game for a while. Well, no more! I got back the Xbox and I'm going to do THREE games that are either only on Xbox or I could only find on Xbox. I won't have you vote for an order because I'm pretty sure you don't want the snow-based games first. But either way, next up we have a very EXTREME game that might have been mentioned in this thread! I know it's an adventure you won't want to miss. All I can say is that I hope you're feeling...crusty... Insetik fucked around with this message at 17:04 on Oct 27, 2014 |
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Oct 27, 2014 16:51
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I hear very good things about the next game.
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Oct 27, 2014 16:56
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See for yourself. Number 1 export of the crust belt: Let's Play Crusty Demons!  What is this game? Crusty Demons is a motocross game based on the real-life stunting group, the Crusty Demons of Dirt. Yes, this is a licensed game. Anyways, do you remember Freekstyle? Do you remember Freestyle Metal X? Why do motocross games keep trying so drat hard? In Crusty Demons, the titular group has sold their souls to the devil to escape death after a big crash. To win back their souls, they must go across the world and do the devil's bidding in various locations. These usually end up meaning 'do dumb objective goals' or 'beat level tricking records' or 'smash your face into something really REALLY HARD!!!1!11!1!" Smashing your face into stuff is the name of the game here in Crusty Demons. What sets it apart is its bailing system, where you try to rack up as many points and as many broken bones as possible after a crash by controlling your guy in the air. Bailing actually does have a point here - getting a big crash will fill your nitro up much faster and could rack up a lot of points. On a scale of 1 to 10, how good is this game? I just praised the bailing system, but the rest of the game is garbage. Bad controlling, bad voice acting, boring challenges, confusing levels, and everything is trying WAY TOO HAD while also not trying at all. There was a moment or two where the game almost became a let's not play because I couldn't progress. Still, I've made it past those barriers, and I'll be bringing you the full game. Oh yeah - for a score, this gets, like, a 4 or 5 out of 10. In this first update, we step into the shoes of the Crusty Demons and go to get...uncrusty...in the tutorial. Watch the ridiculous loading times! Listen to the awful characters! You can skip this video if you want, but it will help you get up to speed on what you'll be seeing from the rest of the game. Crusty Demons Part 1: Intro and Trailer Park  Text Link
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Oct 31, 2014 21:16
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Those are some gameplay mechanics. It's a bit understandable why they'd give more points for bailing (presumably because the Devil is a sadistic jerk who's all about unnecessary suffering) than for doing tricks, but yes, they could have given more thought to it. Also, why do the riders want their souls back when they're immortal anyway? Is it because they actually want to die when they do really dumb stunts instead of having to deal with intolerably amounts of pain afterwards? It seems like a pretty sweet deal compared to most Faustian deals, so they might as well make the most out of it instead of trying to undo it, but maybe that's just me.
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Nov 1, 2014 04:59
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blanktester is so angry these days. And yeah, unless the Devil wants them to commit acts of terrorism (which like what, makes up a good quarter of the tasks you do in these games, breaking poo poo and such), all they're doing is crashing where he wants them you crash and broke bones. That's a pretty sweet deal.
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Nov 1, 2014 10:27
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Croccers posted:blanktester is so angry these days. It's all the fanfic stuff we've been doing on the other channel, man... I'm boiling with rage and hatred pretty much constantly. But what's a man gonna do?  To be serious, what part made you think I sounded angry?
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Nov 4, 2014 02:59
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Daigerus posted:Also, why do the riders want their souls back when they're immortal anyway? Is it because they actually want to die when they do really dumb stunts instead of having to deal with intolerably amounts of pain afterwards? It seems like a pretty sweet deal compared to most Faustian deals, so they might as well make the most out of it instead of trying to undo it, but maybe that's just me. Hey man, you shouldn't make a deal with the devil, man. Even if you...err...already lived off pain before you basically lived off it. Now, let's dive into the New York Ghetto and put our crustiness to the test. We must complete 10 challenges, which either involve going location-to-location in objective missions, doing vehicle-specific challenges, or beating one of the secret tricking records. After doing ten, we go to a race level, where we must pick from a completely different set of bikes (with their own tricks) and do an extremely difficult, extremely technical race. In a game where you can barely drive in a straight line. These races are FUN! Crusty Demons Part 2: New York Ghetto  Text Link
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Nov 5, 2014 01:32
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Let's hope there isn't a race variant of the pimp car. By the way, can you do any tricks in it apart from jumping?
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Nov 5, 2014 11:43
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SelenicMartian posted:Let's hope there isn't a race variant of the pimp car. By the way, can you do any tricks in it apart from jumping? In the other cars? Yes. I skipped the Ice Cream Van in this level, but aside from one vehicle in a later level, every level-specific car is...well, a car. All you have is one trick. You can't wheelie, or do ground tricks, or bail out of it to strike a pose. Admittedly, the tricks are different for each car (at least for most of them) but...so? I guess if they were trying to get you to avoid the vehicles, they were doing a good job.
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Nov 6, 2014 01:36
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After like 4 months, I finally caught back up with the thread. I hope you never run out of terrible games to play, Insetik. NEVER.
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Nov 7, 2014 06:26
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Grope-A-Matic posted:After like 4 months, I finally caught back up with the thread. I hope you never run out of terrible games to play, Insetik. Don't worry, man. And welcome back. You came back right in time to get crusty. Crusty Demons Part 3: Cancun  Text Link I guess we haven't crashed a beach party yet in this series, have we? Or if so, it's been so long I can't remember. Whatever. This level lets us get out of the grimy trailer parks and back-alleys of the previous levels and lets us soak up the sun. Along with the secret records, collectibles, and various high-flying bike challenges, there is a golf cart and a beach buggy that lets you stomp around on four wheels instead of two. Don't get in the golf cart. DON'T DO IT. All the golf cart challenges are extremely boring and lovely. So guess what I go do first? Overall, the level is better than the first one, and the race actually has a few shortcuts that can get you far in the lead. 'Far in the lead' still only means "crash once and you're done", though. Hey, maybe this time well put more than two minutes on the total game timer, right? Insetik fucked around with this message at 23:21 on Nov 13, 2014 |
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Nov 9, 2014 00:29
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For the next level, we're headed to Amsterdam, where we can just get lost in its buildings and streets. In fact, that's precisely what happens. To dull our pain a bit, we bring in a new guest hailing from the country in question, the Netherlands. But the real question: will we 'play' more than 2 minutes this time? And rocking to a soundtrack of early Led Zeppelin, will we almost get in a groove? Crusty Demons Part 4: Amsterdam  Text Link Amsterdam is too confusing for its own good. At the start, half the level is hidden from view - not exactly blocked off, but you might not know it is there - and I can assuredly tell you that if you're not looking for it, you won't find it. Of course, eventually you will start looking because you'll be missing about half the challenges, and the preview pics that show general locations of things are the worst and blandest pics they could have possibly gone with. Ugh. It was so bad doing it the first time. It went a little better from then on out, though. And the race isn't as bad.
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Nov 13, 2014 23:20
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The insane colour vomit these levels are made of is probably produced with the snow from the Dark Summit.
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Nov 16, 2014 00:03
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I've been watching through the videos in this thread for the past few days and I'm really enjoying everything! Keep up the good work.
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Nov 17, 2014 10:27
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ukonvasara posted:I've been watching through the videos in this thread for the past few days and I'm really enjoying everything! Keep up the good work. Thanks, man. I hope you're enjoying Crusty Demons just as much as I...err... Crusty Demons Part 5: Rio  Text Link Rio is a better attempt at a city level than the previous ones were. There's a better divide between the ground floor and the elevated buildings, so it's easier figuring out how to get anywhere. So the level elevates things from "absolute poo poo" to "not absolute poo poo". Though, last level, we actually put significant time on the game clock for some reason. This time, I return to going into the race level immediately. Will that prove to be the reason I was only adding two minutes of time to my counter between levels?
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Nov 17, 2014 23:39
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I'm looking forward to the NPC accents at the next location, and the devil's voice breaking down even further.
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Nov 18, 2014 10:10
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