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Oh, wow, that flare warfare part sounds absolutely horrifying. 
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Nov 13, 2014 19:16
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Grand Fromage posted:I would be surprised, I know of no instances of women fighting in the Roman military. The only women fighters I can think of are the very rare female gladiators. I mean I guess if there were women along with the legion (which there probably were) they might've grabbed a spear and tried to fight, that wouldn't be that strange. More forest, plus more swamp. Germany is practically the land of the forests. This reminds me of something, it's time for another chapter of Arminius' War: Chapter 02: Of Barbarians and Romans Let's go back a bit. 12 BC, about 21 years before Varus got himself slaughtered. In autumn of 12 BC the Sugambrer, a Germanic tribe, suddenly crossed the river Rhine, leaving their ancient homeland, today known as Ruhrgebiet (area of Ruhr). They were not planning on being nice. This completely shocked the Romans and Drusus, the stepson of emperor Augustus, personally rushed back from France to the Rhine and pushed the Sugambrer back over the Rhine. Then he crossed the Rhine himself north of the point were the Sugambrers crossed over, marched south through the territory of the Germanic Usipeter-tribe and devastated the homelands of the Sugambrers. This was not the only retaliatory expedition Drusus did and not the only sudden attack by Germanic tribes, so in the same year, even though winter crept closer by day, he send another expedition into the lands east of the Rhine. He travelled with a Roman fleet downstream the Rhine into the Northsea, where the Frisians (another Germanic tribe), joined Drusus with their own ships and crews to help the Romans fight their eastern Neighbours, the Chaukens. This was practically saving the Roman fleet, which had some trouble against the Chaukens. The second expedition of 12 BC ended with some more adventures against the Brukterers on the river Ems and a successful siege of the Northsea island Burchanis (which is thought to be modern-day Borkum). But now it was winter and Drusus lead his army back to Gaul. Augustus' stepson then travelled onward to Rome, since he was supposed to take over the office of praetor next year.  For better visualization: Black is the sudden attack by the Sugambrers in 12 BC, Blue is Drusus land raid into their homelands, Green is his adventure on the high seas against assorted Germanics with ships. Also Frisians at one point saved his rear end. The recurring theme of Germanics fighting both against and for Rome begins here. From this point in time onwards, the Romans send regularly military expeditions into that weird and strange land on the other side of the Rhine. Spurred on by the sudden incursions by Germanic tribes, the Romans marched deeper and deeper into their lands until they reached the river Elbe for the first time in 9 BC. A network of camps and forts was build, streets and rivers were developed and the newly conquered territory was secured. In 7 BC a first great celebration took place in Rome: Germania, the land of the Germanic tribes, was defeated. It was the first of many such celebrations, since the Romans had to come back to defeat the Germanics quite often. OK, this didn't work. Why the hell did Sugambrers suddenly decide to attack the Roman Empire by themselves? And why did the Romans send entire military expeditions to crush some weird barbarians at the edge of the known world? Why the hell did they celebrate their victory over our ancestors like the little tribes here and there were some sort of great enemy of the Roman people? Looks like we have to go back even further to understand the violent relationship between Romans and Germanics! In the next part we should reach the final starting point and then we'll swing back forward to the Roman Empire celebrating the defeat of their mightiest enemies: Some unknown barbarians somewhere in some sort of forest. Maybe northeast? Somewhere over there, at least. Crossposting from the ancient history thread!
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Nov 13, 2014 19:35
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SeanBeansShako posted:The final words from The Guardian article. Not a new phenomenon. Most historic depictions of war leave out the intestines and hideous suffering and focus on the supposed gallantry, I've noticed.
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Nov 13, 2014 19:36
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SeanBeansShako posted:Makes me wonder what horrible advertising explotiation awaits the memories of the 20th century war dead for sure now. "Awaits?" Perhaps I should introduce you to my friend over here. Mr. Shako, please meet Mr. Video Games Industry. I believe you two would get along great. edit: in all seriousness the bodies don't even need to be cold yet for advertisers to get in on this poo poo.  They're toasted! 
Cyrano4747 fucked around with this message at 19:40 on Nov 13, 2014 |
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Nov 13, 2014 19:37
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Cyrano4747 posted:They're toasted!
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Nov 13, 2014 19:45
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HEY GAL posted:Delicious. Just like this. (The black stones of the Frauenkirche are black because they're original. The repaired bits are sandstone-colored.) Oh my loving god. 
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Nov 13, 2014 19:47
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Cyrano4747 posted:Oh my loving god.
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Nov 13, 2014 19:50
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Libluini posted:Chapter 02: Of Barbarians and Romans This is great and I appreciate it. My knowledge of Rome extends as far as Dan Carlin's Fall of the Roman Republic -> Mike Duncan's History of Rome -> Tom Holland's Rubicon so this is very informative.
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Nov 13, 2014 19:53
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HEY GAL posted:Delicious. Just like this. (The black stones of the Frauenkirche are black because they're original. The repaired bits are sandstone-colored.) this is hosed up, also hilarious mostly just hosed up though
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Nov 13, 2014 19:54
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Cyrano4747 posted:"Awaits?" Didn't they make a Fallujah game?
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Nov 13, 2014 19:58
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Saint Celestine posted:Didn't they make a Fallujah game? A quick google says that the studio that made the Close Combat games was trying to make a game called Six Days in Fallujah, but it might be vaporware by now as this article about them losing Konami as a publisher is still from 2009.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:04
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Saint Celestine posted:Didn't they make a Fallujah game? I wouldn't be surprised. They made a game based on the PMC Blackwater (now known as Academi), who were intimately involved in the Iraq War and whose contractors being murdered precipitated that battle. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blackwater_%28video_game%29
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Nov 13, 2014 20:10
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HEY GAL posted:I like to think that if anyone tried that in the US with our Civil War they'd be boycotted, but we're a crass and tasteless people. Camera on William Tecumseh Sherman warming his hands over a fire on Dec 21st as the even larger fire of Savannah Ga burns behind him, a regimental drummer walks past him in the background playing "Little Drummer Boy", a wan smile forms on his face as he lifts up a steaming mug of swiss miss hot chocolate to his lips, and the text "Hope all your holiday dreams come true" pops up.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:13
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The Blackwater game was pretty tasteless, Six Days in Fallujah was at least making noise about being more respectful (the devs compared it to a psychological horror game) but the publisher got scared of controversy and canned it.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:13
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Some supermarket in the UK did a pretty neat commercial.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:14
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Kuma\War has been doing ripped from the headlines video games since 2004, with a lot of levels set in Iraq. It got extra weird when as a response Iran released Special Operation 85, a similar 3rd person shooter where you rescue Iranian nuclear scientists from dastardly CIA/Mossad operatives.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:19
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Saint Celestine posted:Didn't they make a Fallujah game? There have been lots of board games made of current conflicts not to mention hypothetical cold war scenarios. The oldest Vietnam wargame according to Boardgamegeek is from 1965: quote:Published by Gamescience Corporation in 1965, this game claims to be "a remarkably realistic recreation of the situation" in Vietnam. One player or team controls the Vietcong and the other controls the Government forces. You win either a diplomatic victory or a military victory. Viet Nam includes area movement, insurgency, a government stability index, air strikes and bombing tables, irregular units and regular units. Players secretly position insurgency pawns, write out military orders, move according to those orders, and conduct battles. World opinion, terror, ambush, and psychological warfare are all incorporated into the game in a four page rulebook. Also for lulz some cards from a 1930s version of a Finnish card game  Farmer Ville Finn & family, sausage maker Hans Deutscher & family. The normal versions of the game also had all families share some common traits, in this case the Finnish family all do some forms of sports while Germans are wurst obsessed nazis.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:23
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Rhymenoserous posted:Camera on William Tecumseh Sherman warming his hands over a fire on Dec 21st as the even larger fire of Savannah Ga burns behind him, a regimental drummer walks past him in the background playing "Little Drummer Boy", a wan smile forms on his face as he lifts up a steaming mug of swiss miss hot chocolate to his lips, and the text "Hope all your holiday dreams come true" pops up. Cotton: The Fabric Of Our Lives
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Nov 13, 2014 20:23
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Lets go into business together and make tasteless commercials.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:25
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Rhymenoserous posted:Lets go into business together and make tasteless commercials. But enough about Kim Kartouchean.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:28
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HEY GAL posted:November 1864. Camera on a half-starved sixteen year old from Mississipi shivering in a ditch somewhere. Should he desert? He's not even sure where he is, let alone how he'll get back home. He's never seen snow before and he doesn't know why his clothing won't keep him warm even after it gets wet...they don't have any wool for uniforms any more, that's it. August 1855, Georgia: A young black man gets out of bed, kisses his wife and child on the forehead. He gathers together some corn bread into a napkin and slips it into the pocket of his trousers. Camera follows him out into the early morning air as a breeze stirs the light fog and the sun erupts over the tree-line to show a field of green bushes speckled with white. Cotton: The Fabric Of Our Lives
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Nov 13, 2014 20:38
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Cyrano4747 posted:They're toasted! That can't be right, Don Draper invented that slogan in 1960 
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Nov 13, 2014 20:41
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Hah, yet again history provides way better sick, funny poo poo than we can:
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Nov 13, 2014 20:44
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"One volk, one reich, one soft drink; Coke is it"?
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Nov 13, 2014 20:47
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Cyrano4747 posted:Hah, yet again history provides way better sick, funny poo poo than we can: I'm not gonna lie, I would love to have that hanging in my room. It's just so wrong in the best way and I'm also a sucker for historical memorabilia.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:48
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Der Führer gets fuhrious when ein Volk forget to put der Umlaut into his Getränk.Don Gato posted:I'm not gonna lie, I would love to have that hanging in my room. It's just so wrong in the best way and I'm also a sucker for historical memorabilia. It's not 
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Nov 13, 2014 20:51
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Nenonen posted:It's not Eh, I looked around for a bit and couldn't find any obvious indications that it was a photoshop or anything. Wasn't willing to put too much work in beyond that. I was pretty willing to accept an American company leaving the umlaut off a word. There are a bunch of old Guiness adverts that were designed for the '36 games and never used that turned up recently, so I figured it might be in the same vein.
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Nov 13, 2014 20:56
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Well, this looks like it's relevant again... (Appeared in the Daily Telegraph on 24th October 1914.)
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Nov 13, 2014 20:59
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"Coke Is It" campaign was launched in 1982, though.
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Nov 13, 2014 21:03
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I bet people were really pumped how cheap they could emboss stuff. In your face, Kaiser Willhelm!Cyrano4747 posted:"Awaits?" But video games based on war are so silly, you are given a magical gun that operates perfectly and told to run straight into gunfire of men patient enough to wait for you to shoot them. And if you get shot, you get a face full of jam not a cripping horrible injury and PTSD that haunts you through life. SeanBeansShako fucked around with this message at 21:09 on Nov 13, 2014 |
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Nov 13, 2014 21:05
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Nenonen posted:"Coke Is It" campaign was launched in 1982, though. Not in Germany then I guess, because the Hakenkreuz is forbidden here. That particular advertisment would have lead to a lot of amusing legal hijinks! Cyrano4747 posted:Eh, I looked around for a bit and couldn't find any obvious indications that it was a photoshop or anything. Wasn't willing to put too much work in beyond that. I was pretty willing to accept an American company leaving the umlaut off a word. On the other hand, I encountered "Getrank" as archaic form of "Getränk", so it could have been real.
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Nov 13, 2014 21:09
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SeanBeansShako posted:And if you get shot, you get a face full of jam not a cripping horrible injury and PTSD that haunts you through life. You might want to play Spec Ops: The Line.
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Nov 13, 2014 21:16
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GhostofJohnMuir posted:You might want to play Spec Ops: The Line. Fire that drat mortar now. I already have (It is a good game).
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Nov 13, 2014 21:18
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The IBM ads write themselves. Edit: This is fun:  HEY GUNS fucked around with this message at 21:44 on Nov 13, 2014 |
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Nov 13, 2014 21:32
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It steers terribly, though. (But that's part of the ~immersion~!) That Coke ad reminds me of how by the early forties, Germany was under a trade embargo, so Coke couldn't import the syrup used to make the drink. So instead they came up with something that could be produced locally in Germany, and came up with Fanta. Capitalism, ho! Siivola fucked around with this message at 21:36 on Nov 13, 2014 |
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Nov 13, 2014 21:34
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Nenonen posted:There have been lots of board games made of current conflicts not to mention hypothetical cold war scenarios. The oldest Vietnam wargame according to Boardgamegeek is from 1965: A Distant Plain, covering the counterinsurgency in Afghanistan, is actually pretty great.
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Nov 13, 2014 22:38
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SeanBeansShako posted:But video games based on war are so silly, you are given a magical gun that operates perfectly and told to run straight into gunfire of men patient enough to wait for you to shoot them. And if you get shot, you get a face full of jam not a cripping horrible injury and PTSD that haunts you through life. Makes you miss the old Rainbow Six/Ghost Recon games.
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Nov 13, 2014 22:46
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StashAugustine posted:A Distant Plain, covering the counterinsurgency in Afghanistan, is actually pretty great. i'm reasonably certain that ADP doesn't pretend war is glorious or good in any way though
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Nov 13, 2014 22:49
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Rhymenoserous posted:Makes you miss the old Rainbow Six/Ghost Recon games. You're at the last mission? Oh good here are your two surviving men and twenty clueless replacements. Go get those terrorists but don't you dare lose a hostage!
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Nov 13, 2014 23:00
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HEY GAL posted:Yeah but German chocolate is god dammned delicious. Meanwhile Europeans still think rationing is on and keep buying chocolate cut with hazelnut byproducts.
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Nov 14, 2014 00:03
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