Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

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PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Fo3 posted:

E: My dad was a compulsive van buyer. Traded in his HT kingswood wagon in the 80s, and turned into van man, owning a few different ones as a family car.

My grandpa loved vans. He had a new Chrysler van of whatever nameplate from the 80s until he died, replaced every two years or so. Of course, his health was most of the reason for that, he couldn't get down into a small vehicle anymore and he didn't want a truck/SUV since they drove around visiting family/going to Florida/etc. a lot

# ? Nov 15, 2014 20:52

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# ? May 28, 2024 17:57

PT6A: Jan 5, 2006; Public school teachers are callous dictators who won't lift a finger to stop children from peeing in my plane

I generally hate minivans because I think they look like utter poo poo (as do the vast majority of crossovers), but I find the Transit Connect very nice-looking. If I had a need for that sort of thing, I'd probably go for the Transit Connect.

# ? Nov 15, 2014 20:59

Hog Obituary: Jun 11, 2006; start the day right

Disgruntled Bovine posted:

No I would be inclined to say that anyone who doesn't own a $1200 stroller is superior to anyone who does, at least in the area of financial responsibility.

replace $1200 stroller with $60,000+ vehicle, $1M+ house, any boat, any watch that's not a timex or casio... see where this is going? Sounds like you'd rather have us all waiting years for our lovely VAZ-2101. :ussr:

# ? Nov 15, 2014 21:20

atomicthumbs: Dec 26, 2010; We're in the business of extending man's senses.

eyebeem posted:

My kids like car rides, too. Are you better than me because you drive a cheaper car and don't have as many creature comforts?

well uh maybe if you had bought a minivan instead of a big ol' gas-guzzling low-visibility SUV

# ? Nov 15, 2014 22:01

OXBALLS DOT COM: Sep 11, 2005; by FactsAreUseless; Young Orc

Hog Obituary posted:

replace $1200 stroller with $60,000+ vehicle, $1M+ house, any boat, any watch that's not a timex or casio... see where this is going? Sounds like you'd rather have us all waiting years for our lovely VAZ-2101.

Heh look at this nohavenik who don't drive a Volga

# ? Nov 15, 2014 22:19

PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

eyebeem posted:

Are you better than me

I think on the whole we can say yes.

# ? Nov 15, 2014 22:54

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

Hog Obituary posted:

replace $1200 stroller with $60,000+ vehicle, $1M+ house, any boat, any watch that's not a timex or casio... see where this is going? Sounds like you'd rather have us all waiting years for our lovely VAZ-2101.

Your analogy is bad and depending where you live a $1M house might be the bare minimum to get you out of the slums.

Eyebeem drives a Nissan Titan, the full-size truck that's grossly inferior to every other full-size truck on the market in every capacity, so frankly the guy in a Corolla really is driving a better vehicle sorry.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:03

Xguard86: Nov 22, 2004; "You don't understand his pain. Everywhere he goes he sees women working, wearing pants, speaking in gatherings, voting. Surely they will burn in the white hot flames of Hell"

If you're not cramming your kid into the back of your Mercedes SL with seat belts you installed yourself because the dealership refused for liability reasons you're doing in wrong.

<3 <3 dad.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:20

Applebees Appetizer: Jan 23, 2006

eyebeem posted:

My kids like car rides, too. Are you better than me because you drive a cheaper car and don't have as many creature comforts?

I'm not superior because I own a $1,200 stroller, but you're not superior because you don't.

Not superior, just smarter. You're dumb.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:21

CAT INTERCEPTOR: Nov 9, 2004; Basically a male Margaret Thatcher

WTF is there really such a thing as a 1200 buck kiddy pram???? It better come with a stereo, air conditioning, power windows and cooled cup hodlers for that price.

(Seriously, is that really a thing??? 1200 bucks for a stroller? How is that even possible?)

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:42

eyebeem: Jul 18, 2013; by R. Guyovich

Wheeee posted:

Your analogy is bad and depending where you live a $1M house might be the bare minimum to get you out of the slums.

Eyebeem drives a Nissan Titan, the full-size truck that's grossly inferior to every other full-size truck on the market in every capacity, so frankly the guy in a Corolla really is driving a better vehicle sorry.

The Titan is no more, having been replaced by an ecoboost F150. It was certainly inferior to the competition, but I still really liked that truck.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:46

eyebeem: Jul 18, 2013; by R. Guyovich

Cat Terrist posted:

WTF is there really such a thing as a 1200 buck kiddy pram???? It better come with a stereo, air conditioning, power windows and cooled cup hodlers for that price.

(Seriously, is that really a thing??? 1200 bucks for a stroller? How is that even possible?)

Absolutely. No self respecting upper middle class family can walk along the park trail with a graco or britax. Stokke, Bloom, Uppababy or bust.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:48

Applebees Appetizer: Jan 23, 2006

Hells yeah can't have the neighbors scoffing :colbert:

For that price a stroller better make me a sandwich while blowing me at the same time.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:51

Mr. Wiggles: Dec 1, 2003; We are all drinking from the highball glass of ideology.

Any self respecting parent pushes their child in a MacLaren.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 00:53

Disgruntled Bovine: Jul 5, 2010

Hog Obituary posted:

replace $1200 stroller with $60,000+ vehicle, $1M+ house, any boat, any watch that's not a timex or casio... see where this is going? Sounds like you'd rather have us all waiting years for our lovely VAZ-2101.

What does a $1200 stroller give you compared to a $200 or even $500 stroller? Because a $60k+ vehicle can offer a hell of a lot more than a $30k vehicle, and a $1M+ house can give you a lot more than a $400k house. I think the point is that there's going to be minimal advantage to a $1200 stroller over a significantly cheaper one, so the only reason to buy it is to say you spent $1200 on your stroller, as eyebeem is.

Also, to address the watch question, I would agree that buying anything beyond a timex or casio is somewhat unnecessary, but at least some high end watches can be considered a thing of mechanical and engineering beauty, I very much doubt the $1200 stroller falls into that category.

Disgruntled Bovine fucked around with this message at 01:35 on Nov 16, 2014

# ? Nov 16, 2014 01:31

eyebeem: Jul 18, 2013; by R. Guyovich

Mr. Wiggles posted:

Any self respecting parent pushes their child in a MacLaren.

Lower middle class trash. You can buy a McLaren at target.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 01:52

eyebeem: Jul 18, 2013; by R. Guyovich

Disgruntled Bovine posted:

I very much doubt the $1200 stroller falls into that category.

Though it's not $1,200, the 4moms origami has to appeal to any engineering geek.

http://www.4moms.com/origami

# ? Nov 16, 2014 02:01

Disgruntled Bovine: Jul 5, 2010

See? I rest my case. What could a $1200 stroller do that's better than power folding push-generator charging, with running lights and an LCD dashboard?

:smithicide:

# ? Nov 16, 2014 02:49

Throatwarbler: Nov 17, 2008; by vyelkin

The rest of that thing does look pretty neat but is "power folding" really such a useful thing to have? Seems like they could make it quite a bit cheaper and lighter without it, or at least make it optional.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 02:53

Applebees Appetizer: Jan 23, 2006

There is nothing special about a $1200 stroller, it's all perceived value. Mark up the price to ridiculous levels and they will come. It's a great marketing trick actually.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 03:04

Bob NewSCART: Feb 1, 2012; Outstanding afternoon. "I've often said there's nothing better for the inside of a man than the outside of a horse."

I mean look at, dumbasses in AI will brag about it.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 03:06

iwentdoodie: Apr 29, 2005; 🤗YOU'RE WELCOME🤗

leica posted:

There is nothing special about a $1200 stroller, it's all perceived value. Mark up the price to ridiculous levels and they will come. It's a great marketing trick actually.

loving white people.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 03:10

eriddy: Jan 21, 2005; sixty nine lmao

it's worth it if it also folds your child up so you can have both the stroller and tiny human become extra portable and easy to load on pallets.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 03:52

Un-l337-Pork: Sep 9, 2001; Oooh yeah...

Throatwarbler posted:

The rest of that thing does look pretty neat but is "power folding" really such a useful thing to have? Seems like they could make it quite a bit cheaper and lighter without it, or at least make it optional.

Being able to easily fold a stroller with one hand is super-convenient when it's just you and the kid.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 03:54

eyebeem: Jul 18, 2013; by R. Guyovich

leica posted:

There is nothing special about a $1200 stroller, it's all perceived value. Mark up the price to ridiculous levels and they will come. It's a great marketing trick actually.

Oh, its absolutely marketing to a great degree. However, there are differences in quality of construction and materials, which really do make a difference (though not relative to the price differential). My wife wanted the Stokke Xplory because it places our daughter close to her face in a reverse facing position and has an adjustable height feature. Additionally, yes, its a luxury item. Like buying a Prada bag over a coach or generic, it costs more because of the badge. It also means the resale value is high, so the actual price of ownership is fairly low if you're willing to throw it up on Craigslist when you're done with it.

There's no justification good enough to satisfy someone looking at it by he numbers, but AI of all places should understand that. Most of my responses have been tongue in cheek, but in all reality, I can afford certain luxuries in life, and if I'm going to drop thousands of dollars on cycling crap, I'm not going to raise a shitfit when my wife wants a ludicrously expensive stroller (especially when she earns half the income).

# ? Nov 16, 2014 04:00

Xguard86: Nov 22, 2004; "You don't understand his pain. Everywhere he goes he sees women working, wearing pants, speaking in gatherings, voting. Surely they will burn in the white hot flames of Hell"

The best part is that if the man wants his 1200 dollar stroller and someone wants to build it: more power to him.

Speaking of expensive transportation with marginal real world value: I read hellcats are being delivered did anyone in AI actually buy one? I'm looking forward to hearing what normal people think DDing them. If you notice the 707 or if traction control/traffic/poo poo roads makes it all theoretical.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 04:09

Applebees Appetizer: Jan 23, 2006

eyebeem posted:

There's no justification good enough to satisfy someone looking at it by he numbers, but AI of all places should understand that.

We understand it when it comes to cars, sure. Bikes too. Strollers......Not so much I would think.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 04:21

Propaganda Bob: Aug 26, 2006; Not one step backwards!

If I'm gonna spend $1200 on a stroller it better shoot flames out the back.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 05:28

Hog Obituary: Jun 11, 2006; start the day right

Look, I can sell you a box of store brand Oatey O's for $1, a box of Cheerios for $3, or some organic bullshit made from flax for $5. Which one do you want and why?
Realistically the choice will not affect your finances in any meaningful way, so it's all about your perception of value and what it's worth to you. If you get any value at all out of the most expensive choice, you're probably going to take it. Ever get bacon on your burger? Ever choose a craft brew over a bud light? You made some call that it was worth it to you. Was that bacon actually worth $1? Ever shop for clothing somewhere besides goodwill? Ever buy an Apple product? It goes on and on...

Justifying a $1200 stroller seems way easier than justifying a $60k car. Especially if the stroller is maintains some resale value.

# ? Nov 16, 2014 05:36

INCHI DICKARI: Aug 23, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

HOLY gently caress SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT STROLLERS IN THE CAR THREAD

# ? Nov 16, 2014 06:15

Olivil: Jul 15, 2010; Wow I'd like to be as smart as a computer

OFFICER 13 INCH posted:

HOLY gently caress SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT STROLLERS IN THE CAR THREAD

# ? Nov 16, 2014 06:44

KakerMix: Apr 8, 2004; 8.2 M.P.G.

OFFICER 13 INCH posted:

HOLY gently caress SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT STROLLERS IN THE CAR THREAD

Look man sometimes I need to go offroad with my kid ok, maybe tow some water wings to the lake up north

# ? Nov 16, 2014 06:56

Applebees Appetizer: Jan 23, 2006

I took my kid offroad all the time.

In an XJ :smug:

Propaganda Bob posted:

If I'm gonna spend $1200 on a stroller it better shoot flames out the back.

Also this is awesome

Applebees Appetizer fucked around with this message at 08:54 on Nov 16, 2014

# ? Nov 16, 2014 08:51

Nohearum: Nov 2, 2013

Stroller Insanity

# ? Nov 16, 2014 19:26

Friar Zucchini: Aug 6, 2010

Here, read about a 450hp stroller with a Cadillac badge that's winking at the M3 and blowing kisses at it.

http://wot.motortrend.com/1411_leaked_2016_cadillac_ats_v_revealed_in_full.html

edit: Oh excuse me the M4. :rolleye:

# ? Nov 16, 2014 20:50

angryhampster: Oct 21, 2005

Nohearum posted:

Stroller Insanity

Automotive Insanity: This stroller cost more than your $600 exhaust

# ? Nov 16, 2014 21:13

Presto: Nov 22, 2002; Keep calm and Harry on.

Mr. Wiggles posted:

Any self respecting parent pushes their child in a MacLaren.

A year or two ago I saw a bunch of NSXs at a car show in the local town center. One of them had a child seat installed. So there you go; the Acura NSX: Sporty and family-friendly.

# ? Nov 17, 2014 00:55

mobby_6kl: Aug 9, 2009; by Fluffdaddy

angryhampster posted:

Automotive Insanity: This stroller cost more than your $600 exhaust

This stroller cost more than your car :gonk:

# ? Nov 17, 2014 00:57

PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Presto posted:

A year or two ago I saw a bunch of NSXs at a car show in the local town center. One of them had a child seat installed. So there you go; the Acura NSX: Sporty and family-friendly.

NSX dad is best dad

# ? Nov 17, 2014 08:52

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# ? May 28, 2024 17:57

Throatwarbler: Nov 17, 2008; by vyelkin

Welp.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yC6tKvEy6t0&t=43s

quote:

Shelby GT350 Mustang: The Legend Returns

� All-new Shelby� GT350 Mustang is a thoroughbred capable of tackling the world's most
challenging roads and racetracks

� GT350 is powered by a unique, high-revving flat-plane crankshaft 5.2-liter V8 engine that will produce more than 500 horsepower � the most powerful naturally aspirated Ford production engine ever

� Advanced materials, MagneRide dampers, aggressive brakes and finely tuned aerodynamics push the performance of Mustang to previously unmatched levels

LOS ANGELES, Nov. 17, 2014 � One of the most iconic performance Mustang nameplates of all time is returning, Ford confirmed today with the reveal of the all-new Shelby� GT350
Mustang.

The original Shelby GT350 introduced in 1965 established Mustang's performance credentials. The all-new Shelby GT350 Mustang, featuring the most powerful naturally aspirated Ford production engine ever, is a world-class performance vehicle, designed to tackle the planet's most challenging roads � an all-day track car that's also street legal.

The new GT350 builds on Carroll Shelby's original idea � transforming a great every-day car into a dominant road racer � by taking advantage of a dramatically improved sixth-generation Mustang to create a truly special driving experience. Driving enthusiasts behind the wheel of a Shelby GT350 can expect to be treated to the most balanced, nimble and exhilarating production Mustang yet.

Ford engineers took an innovative approach with GT350. Rather than develop individual systems to perform well independently, every component and shape is optimized to work in concert; balance is the key. While paying rigorous attention to detail, the team pushed the envelope with cutting-edge materials and technologies.

"When we started working on this car, we wanted to build the best possible Mustang for the places we most love to drive � challenging back roads with a variety of corners and elevation changes � and the track on weekends," said Raj Nair, Ford group vice president, Global Product Development. "Every change we made to this car was driven by the functional requirements of a powerful, responsive powerplant � nimble, precise handling and massive stopping power."

Track-tuned driveline
Early in development of the GT350, it was decided a high-revving, naturally aspirated V8 engine would best suit a track-focused Mustang.

"The final product is essentially an all-new powerplant unique to GT350 � and one that takes true advantage of the new chassis dynamics of the Mustang platform," said Jamal Hameedi, chief engineer, Ford Global Performance Vehicles.

The new 5.2-liter engine is the first-ever production V8 from Ford with a flat-plane crankshaft, an architecture typically found only in racing applications or exotic European sports cars. Unlike a traditional V8, where the connecting rods are attached to the crankshaft at 90-degree intervals, this design evenly spaces all crank pins at 180-degree intervals.

The 180-degree, flat-plane layout permits a cylinder firing order that alternates between cylinder banks, reducing the overlap of exhaust pressure pulses. When combined with cylinder-head
and valvetrain advancements, this permits better cylinder breathing, further extending the
performance envelope of the V8.

The result is the most powerful naturally aspirated production Ford engine ever, at more than
500 horsepower, with a torque peak above 400 lb.-ft. The track capability is enhanced by the output characteristics of the engine � the 5.2-liter V8 features an exceptionally broad torque
curve. Combined with its high-revving ability, the flat-plane 5.2-liter V8 gives drivers an
enormous amount of performance and flexibility within each gear of the lightweight six-speed manual transmission. A standard Ford-tuned Torsen limited-slip differential optimizes cornering
grip and straight-line traction.

"Make no mistake, this is an American interpretation of a flat-plane crankshaft V8, and the 5.2-
liter produces a distinctive, throaty howl from its four exhaust tips," said Hameedi.

Balanced dynamics
The new Mustang platform is the strongest in the history of the brand, with torsional stiffness increased 28 percent over the previous model. That stiff structure ensures the suspension geometry remains consistent, even under hard driving on back roads and tracks. Front stiffness is further improved on GT350 with a cutting-edge injection-molded carbon fiber composite grille opening and optional lightweight tower-to-tower brace. The front track has been increased while spring rates and bushings have been recalibrated all around, with ride height reduced compared to Mustang GT.

For optimum handling, the wheels need to respond quickly to the contours of the road and driver input. Reducing unsprung mass is key to improving that response, but a balance must be struck between taking mass out of a suspension and delivering truly capable braking performance.

Due to the significant speeds the car can develop, GT350 features the most track-credible brake system ever offered on a Ford vehicle in terms of absolute stopping power, fade resistance and brake pedal feel. The brakes are two-piece cross-drilled iron discs mounted to aluminum hats.

At the front are massive 394-millimeter rotors clamped by Brembo six-piston fixed calipers with integrated caliper bridges, while 380-millimeter rotors at the rear utilize four-piston calipers.

GT350 makes use of extra-stiff 19-inch aluminum-alloy wheels � 10.5 inches wide in front, 11.0 inches in the rear � clad in state-of-the-art Michelin Pilot Super Sport tires with GT350-specific sidewall construction, tread face and compound. The custom tires are designed to deliver maximum grip on the road or at the track.

Ultra-quick responsiveness to changing conditions is provided by the first-ever Ford application of continuously controlled MagneRide dampers. The dampers are filled with a hydraulic fluid impregnated with iron particles; when an electric current is passed through the fluid, a near- instant adjustment of the suspension performance can be made. With wheel position sensors monitoring motion thousands of times per second combined with other vehicle data, changes can be made to each corner independently every 10 milliseconds for optimum handling performance. This is a system designed not just to make the car handle better but to instill greater confidence in even the best driver.

Obsession to detail
"Everything we changed on GT350 is purely functional-driven design, with the goal of improving the overall performance of the car," said Chris Svensson, Ford design director, The Americas. "We optimized the aero shape of the car, and then fine-tuned what was left to increase downforce and cooling airflow." All bodywork from the windshield forward is unique to this high- performance model and up to two inches lower than Mustang GT.

The new aluminum hood has been lowered and sloped, compared to the base Mustang, tightly wrapped around the engine for the smallest possible aerodynamic signature. Front and rear aero elements have been balanced to work together on the track. The fascia has been resculpted to provide the aggressive lower front splitter with maximum pressure and a ducted belly pan delivers significant downforce. The hood outlet acts as a heat extractor while also reducing underhood lift at high speed. At the rear, much of the engineering was focused on creating an aggressive functional diffuser doing double duty to increase downforce and provide cooling air to the optional differential cooler, and a subtle lip spoiler across the trailing edge of the decklid increases downforce without adding excess drag.

The athletic stance of the all-new Mustang is further accentuated with recontoured aluminum front fenders to accommodate the wider front track and wider wheel arches. Front fender vents work with vented inner fenders to draw out turbulent air in the wheel wells and smoothly direct it down the side of the car. The forward-angled grille is designed with individual openings to draw air through the radiator, high-pressure engine air intake, cooling ducts for the front brakes and, optional with the Track Pack, an engine oil cooler and a transmission cooler.

Focus-driven cockpit changes
Like everything else about GT350, the interior has been optimized for driving, beginning with the specially designed Recaro sport seats with a unique cloth. Hundreds of hours and many prototypes went into a seat that is both comfortable in daily driving and capable on the track. A flat-bottom steering wheel makes it easier for the driver to get in and out, and is more ergonomic on the racetrack. Gauges are upgraded to reflect the enormous performance capability of the car. Chrome and bright finishes have been reduced or eliminated to prevent sun glare that may distract the driver.

The advanced technology inherent to Mustang has been deployed for duty in the Shelby GT350. An all-new integrated driver control system allows selection of five unique modes that tailor ABS, stability control, traction control, steering effort, throttle mapping, MagneRide tuning and exhaust settings, depending on driver preference, to achieve maximum performance. Drivers are invited to test them all.

Drivers interested in comfort, convenience and entertainment upgrades may select the Tech Pack, which includes power, leather-trimmed seats; Shaker Audio; 8-inch MyFord Touch� LCD touch screen; and dual zone electronic temperature control, to name a few features.

"We took the best Ford Mustang yet and massaged every aspect of the car that affects the performance driving experience," said Hameedi. "We tested endlessly on the most challenging roads and tracks in the world, and we believe serious drivers will love the Shelby GT350
Mustang."

50 years of Ford Mustang
Shelby GT350 Mustang is the latest in an all-new line of Mustang fastback and convertible models, including the specially designed 50th Anniversary Edition Mustang.

More than 9.2 million Mustangs have been sold since the car's 1964 debut.

With more options to choose from, there is a Mustang to fit any lifestyle. The upgraded V8 in Mustang GT � now delivering 435 horsepower and 400 lb.-ft. of torque � is joined by a 300- horsepower 3.7-liter V6 and an all-new 2.3-liter EcoBoost� engine that brings state-of-the-art technology to Mustang.

The Mustang 2.3-liter EcoBoost engine uses direct injection, variable cam timing and a twin- scroll turbocharger to deliver the performance drivers expect with an output of 310 horsepower and 320 lb.-ft. of torque.

The new Mustang continues to be popular. In addition to being the most-liked vehicle on Facebook with 8 million likes, all-new models are turning on U.S. dealer lots in an average of six days.

Now that this and the Hellcat Charger/Challenger exist, why do other carmakers even make cars anymore? Might as well wrap it up now.

# ? Nov 17, 2014 16:08

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Read about a new car? Thats the 2024 Giant Piece of Shit

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