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SocketWrench
Jul 8, 2012

by Fritz the Horse

Krotera posted:

particularly your seemingly semi-ironic statement that the CIA's sending shady dudes to keep your posting on the down-low

I'd go as far as to say absolutely buck fuckin' retarded since if they wanted to shut his rear end up they would with no issue. Those tinfoil helmets aren't bullet proof

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Prester Jane
Nov 4, 2008

by Hand Knit
Since this thread seems to be drifting off I figured I would put myself out there for the curious. For those who don't know I am a diagnosed Schizophrenic that spent 6 years deeeep into conspiracy theory lala land. I listened to Alex Jones 3 hours a day, read nearly every David Icke book, drank colloidal silver to treat serious medical conditions and choked down shitloads of tangy tangerine. I was at the Dacid Icke lecture in Cleveland Ohio when he and Jesse Ventura had their famous falling out. I had around 120 books and 30 DVD's or so on various Conspiracy topics that was the envy of my wingnut friends. By the end of it you would have had to look hard to find anyone who bought it more fully than I did, there were even some now quite infamous incidents where I literally stood on a picnic table at the break area of work and started ranting about FEMA camps to wake up my co-workers.

Yeah, I was THAT guy.

Obviously I'm all better now, and I have left all that behind me. I'd be more than willing to answer any questions posters might have about being a hardcore conspiracy theorist/crazy person.

Obdicut
May 15, 2012

"What election?"

Prester John posted:

Since this thread seems to be drifting off I figured I would put myself out there for the curious. For those who don't know I am a diagnosed Schizophrenic that spent 6 years deeeep into conspiracy theory lala land. I listened to Alex Jones 3 hours a day, read nearly every David Icke book, drank colloidal silver to treat serious medical conditions and choked down shitloads of tangy tangerine. I was at the Dacid Icke lecture in Cleveland Ohio when he and Jesse Ventura had their famous falling out. I had around 120 books and 30 DVD's or so on various Conspiracy topics that was the envy of my wingnut friends. By the end of it you would have had to look hard to find anyone who bought it more fully than I did, there were even some now quite infamous incidents where I literally stood on a picnic table at the break area of work and started ranting about FEMA camps to wake up my co-workers.

Yeah, I was THAT guy.

Obviously I'm all better now, and I have left all that behind me. I'd be more than willing to answer any questions posters might have about being a hardcore conspiracy theorist/crazy person.

I realize this might be complicated by the schitzoprhenia, but did engaging with that material make you feel 'good', or did it provoke more anxiety?

Lightning Jim
Nov 18, 2006

Just a mad weather-ologist :science:

Prester John posted:

Since this thread seems to be drifting off I figured I would put myself out there for the curious. For those who don't know I am a diagnosed Schizophrenic that spent 6 years deeeep into conspiracy theory lala land. I listened to Alex Jones 3 hours a day, read nearly every David Icke book, drank colloidal silver to treat serious medical conditions and choked down shitloads of tangy tangerine. I was at the Dacid Icke lecture in Cleveland Ohio when he and Jesse Ventura had their famous falling out. I had around 120 books and 30 DVD's or so on various Conspiracy topics that was the envy of my wingnut friends. By the end of it you would have had to look hard to find anyone who bought it more fully than I did, there were even some now quite infamous incidents where I literally stood on a picnic table at the break area of work and started ranting about FEMA camps to wake up my co-workers.

Yeah, I was THAT guy.

Obviously I'm all better now, and I have left all that behind me. I'd be more than willing to answer any questions posters might have about being a hardcore conspiracy theorist/crazy person.

I'd like to hear the difference because I started to go that direction and I've got nothing like scizophenia.
For me it was continually being immersed in it thinking I was being educated when I realize wasn't. And it was a step back for a while and return to the material that made me realize how taken in I was.

woke wedding drone
Jun 1, 2003

by exmarx
Fun Shoe

Prester John posted:

I was at the David Icke lecture in Cleveland Ohio when he and Jesse Ventura had their famous falling out.

I would definitely like to read a detailed account of this.

AddMEonFacebook
Dec 3, 2012

by Cowcaster

SocketWrench posted:

I'd go as far as to say absolutely buck fuckin' retarded since if they wanted to shut his rear end up they would with no issue. Those tinfoil helmets aren't bullet proof

Two world wars, police state in America. I'm a brilliant businessman, but believe me they have tried to sabotage my career, as well. A bullet may well be coming.

Prester John posted:

Since this thread seems to be drifting off I figured I would put myself out there for the curious. For those who don't know I am a diagnosed Schizophrenic that spent 6 years deeeep into conspiracy theory lala land. I listened to Alex Jones 3 hours a day, read nearly every David Icke book, drank colloidal silver to treat serious medical conditions and choked down shitloads of tangy tangerine. I was at the Dacid Icke lecture in Cleveland Ohio when he and Jesse Ventura had their famous falling out. I had around 120 books and 30 DVD's or so on various Conspiracy topics that was the envy of my wingnut friends. By the end of it you would have had to look hard to find anyone who bought it more fully than I did, there were even some now quite infamous incidents where I literally stood on a picnic table at the break area of work and started ranting about FEMA camps to wake up my co-workers.

Yeah, I was THAT guy.

Obviously I'm all better now, and I have left all that behind me. I'd be more than willing to answer any questions posters might have about being a hardcore conspiracy theorist/crazy person.

What's it like in the CIA?

zakharov
Nov 30, 2002

:kimchi: Tater Love :kimchi:

Prester John posted:

Since this thread seems to be drifting off I figured I would put myself out there for the curious. For those who don't know I am a diagnosed Schizophrenic that spent 6 years deeeep into conspiracy theory lala land. I listened to Alex Jones 3 hours a day, read nearly every David Icke book, drank colloidal silver to treat serious medical conditions and choked down shitloads of tangy tangerine. I was at the Dacid Icke lecture in Cleveland Ohio when he and Jesse Ventura had their famous falling out. I had around 120 books and 30 DVD's or so on various Conspiracy topics that was the envy of my wingnut friends. By the end of it you would have had to look hard to find anyone who bought it more fully than I did, there were even some now quite infamous incidents where I literally stood on a picnic table at the break area of work and started ranting about FEMA camps to wake up my co-workers.

Yeah, I was THAT guy.

Obviously I'm all better now, and I have left all that behind me. I'd be more than willing to answer any questions posters might have about being a hardcore conspiracy theorist/crazy person.

Did you turn blue?

Prester Jane
Nov 4, 2008

by Hand Knit

AddMEonFacebook posted:

What's it like in the CIA?

True story: The first time I started seeking treatment for my illness (I was homeless at the time) I went to get an evaluation from an agency that helps people with mental illness. The butterflies decorating the front of the building (known as the "Transformational Center") almost made me bolt on the spot though. You see, the butterflies were markings of a Monarch facility, and I realized how perfect of a place a mental illness screening facility would be for finding good candidates for the Monarch program. I was terrified that if I were recognized as a latent psychic I might be quietly shipped off to some dark site never to be heard from again, terrified enough to refuse treatment just on the mere chance that I might be walking into a trap. Fortunately at the time I wanted help so badly I was willing to bear the risk. I justified it to myself at the time by reasoning that "they" already had me on camera and any suspicious behavior might alert them anyways, so it was best to just play along and avoid mentioning anything about my difficulties controlling my psychic abilities.

I share this story to illustrate just how deeply I was in. I know (unless you are a really excellent troll in which case bravo) there is nothing I could ever say to convince you that I am not some sort of masterfully clever CIA troll sent here to spend thousands of manhours to steer the conversation of a paltry few dozen people. I've been where you seem to be at, and that is why I'll take your jab in stride. All I can say is that I've been writing and posting about my mental illness/homelessness on this forum for over a year now and have seldom mentioned much about my history as a Conspiracy Theorist, so I must be a Toblerone Triangular level deep cover troll at this point.


Fake Edit: Working on answering everyone's questions so far.

Pook Good Mook
Aug 6, 2013


ENFORCE THE UNITED STATES DRESS CODE AT ALL COSTS!

This message paid for by the Men's Wearhouse& Jos A Bank Lobbying Group
You really should write a book or some scholarly article.

Prester Jane
Nov 4, 2008

by Hand Knit

zakharov posted:

Did you turn blue?

Nope. By the by though, if you are ever trying to have a conversation with a wingnut about colloidal silver I would recommend against bringing up the "turns you blue" thing because they will just dismiss you as a blind sheeple right out of hand. While yes, it can potentially turn you blue, there are only like 5 recorded cases and they all involved people consuming massive amounts of colloidal silver made in the old style home-made kits. It is a very rare circumstance that any colloidal silver nut has had brought up to him literally every time colloidal silver is discussed. It is a bit like trying to discuss firearms with a gun nut and calling a "magazine" a "clip". Its a spergy detail most everyone who has ever disagreed with them has been wrong about and they will use it to dismiss anything you have to say on the subject.



Obdicut posted:

I realize this might be complicated by the schitzoprhenia, but did engaging with that material make you feel 'good', or did it provoke more anxiety?

This is a tremendously complicated question, but I will do my best to answer.

The short answer is, it did both, at the same time, for different but sometimes overlapping reasons. For example, a feeling of dread about the future, as well as high anxiety in general, are both features of my illness. Conspiracy material would make me feel that these feelings were justified. And not only justified, but what made me somebody. Having this "knowing" about the horror that lay in the future was proof of my intellectual and spiritual maturity. The Illuminati were bent on evil and if you were "awake" enough that fact was obvious. This quelled many of my own internal doubts and felt like a breath of fresh air in some ways. Instead of wondering what was wrong with me, I was proud of what was right with me. I was a cut above 99% of the human population simply by being in tune enough with the "Truth" to be a freaked out mess. My mess of a life and various problems were proof that "I" was the sane person and *EVERYONE ELSE* were the crazy people. The downside to the vindication though is that being told your paranoia is justified feeds into it, making you need that feeling of vindication more. So you engage with more conspiracy material and thus begins a nasty vicious cycle.

There were other ways in which the material both made me feel good and increased my anxiety. It was for example an easy escape from life. If some situation in my life was freaking me out I could just go read some new conspiracy report or something. My own embarrassment at being unable to cope well in the world would be swept away by reading about what a truly lovely place the world really was. Or I could fantasize about how none of my problems would matter once society collapsed. "Yes sir someday all my write-ups at work won't mean poo poo and assholes like my boss will be begging for help from people like me who know to survive if anything but this modern dystopia." SO I would get off thinking about how awesome it will be to not have to deal with the bullshit of the moment when society collapses, but at the same time I was really loving freaked out about society actually collapsing.

AVeryLargeRadish
Aug 19, 2011

I LITERALLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO NOT BE A WEIRD SEXUAL CREEP ABOUT PREPUBESCENT ANIME GIRLS, READ ALL ABOUT IT HERE!!!
Something everyone here should understand is what schizophrenia is, in some part, about. Schizophrenics see connections everywhere and in everything. A non-schizophrenic will also make connections between things and that is normal behavior, but a schizophrenic makes many more connections and makes many erroneous ones. As an example: Two of your coworkers who you do not like are wearing red ties, this morning the president gave an address and was wearing a red tie, therefore your coworkers have been working for the government to discredit you.

Lightning Jim
Nov 18, 2006

Just a mad weather-ologist :science:

Prester John posted:

There were other ways in which the material both made me feel good and increased my anxiety. It was for example an easy escape from life. If some situation in my life was freaking me out I could just go read some new conspiracy report or something. My own embarrassment at being unable to cope well in the world would be swept away by reading about what a truly lovely place the world really was. Or I could fantasize about how none of my problems would matter once society collapsed. "Yes sir someday all my write-ups at work won't mean poo poo and assholes like my boss will be begging for help from people like me who know to survive if anything but this modern dystopia." SO I would get off thinking about how awesome it will be to not have to deal with the bullshit of the moment when society collapses, but at the same time I was really loving freaked out about society actually collapsing.

Thank you, Prester John, for being willing to expose yourself like this.

It's interesting to see how this reminds me somewhat of what I went through during my conspiracy period.

How did going through the treatment affect your conspiracy leanings?

Sharkie
Feb 4, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

Prester John posted:

True story: The first time I started seeking treatment for my illness (I was homeless at the time) I went to get an evaluation from an agency that helps people with mental illness. The butterflies decorating the front of the building (known as the "Transformational Center") almost made me bolt on the spot though. You see, the butterflies were markings of a Monarch facility, and I realized how perfect of a place a mental illness screening facility would be for finding good candidates for the Monarch program. I was terrified that if I were recognized as a latent psychic I might be quietly shipped off to some dark site never to be heard from again, terrified enough to refuse treatment just on the mere chance that I might be walking into a trap. Fortunately at the time I wanted help so badly I was willing to bear the risk. I justified it to myself at the time by reasoning that "they" already had me on camera and any suspicious behavior might alert them anyways, so it was best to just play along and avoid mentioning anything about my difficulties controlling my psychic abilities.

Thanks so much for sharing in this and your other posts. I'm interested in conspiracies, though I don't believe in them, so right when you mentioned "butterflies," my mind too immediately jumped to Monarch programming. I can only imagine how all that felt, and I know it took guts to go in and get help.

After you got help, did you ever go back and try to talk to conspiracy people, or revisit some of your old ideas, or did you just walk away from it without looking back?

AddMEonFacebook
Dec 3, 2012

by Cowcaster
It's really depressing reading you actually because your poverty essentially forced you to give up the truth. I maybe have the luxury of the truth. Hard thought. It's actually obviously true that slaves who don't know the truth won't rebel.

I don't really see it as my responsibility to educate people. I just come here to joke around. I think it is a pretty good gimmick actually, and I think there is some lack of critical thought that goes into thinking about the government, by most people, and I'll have to admit, it wasn't until now how I fully appreciated how poverty and the physical hell they will put you through if you dis-obey forces you to change your mind as well, a soft death.

We have to fight on, though. We can't be afraid of poverty. I'm not afraid of that nor death nor speaking my view.

AddMEonFacebook fucked around with this message at 02:16 on Nov 19, 2014

I AM GRANDO
Aug 20, 2006

So how long has Roseanne been unmedicated?

http://www.esquire.com/blogs/culture/roseanne-barr-interview

quote:

RB: You know about MKUltra, right?

ESQ: Vaguely. I know they were CIA psychiatric experiments during the ‘50s and ‘60s.

RB: It's a lot of programs for creating a certain class of citizen. The basis of it is that they did experiments on people and didn't get their consent. I'm not going to be able to go into it too much, but people should really take a look at mind control, and how it works, and how it's been used on them.

ESQ: On them personally?

RB: Generations of people, not only here but all over the world, are still being affected by it. It's pretty interesting.

ESQ: But what does this have to do with Hollywood? You're saying the government is using mind control to tell celebrities what to say?

RB: It would take me way too long to get into.

ESQ: What's the short version?

RB: A lot of people who are actors and artists who work in Hollywood come from a background of abuse, and you can make abused people very fearful and they'll do what they're told. Hollywood definitely has a point of view that it sells. I remember when we were little and we used to make fun of communist Russia in school. We'd say, "Their military tells their television stations what they can show." I remember when I was a kid, we used to think that was just horrible.


ESQ: It hasn't come to that, has it? Is the U.S. Military secretly running the upfronts?

RB: No, but there's definitely a control of the artist. You can't break through Hollywood formulaic points of view. I've tried, and I think I was more successful than anybody at doing it. I'm still trying, and I'll continue to try. Because if you have something like a media, and truth doesn't come through it, what does that say? That's not good. But I still have hope that the truth about the real issues that most Americans face can be on television. I'm trying anyway.

ESQ: But isn't truth, or at least political truth, in the eye of the beholder?

RB: Not at all.

ESQ: Bruce Springsteen is just a puppet for Obama, or Victoria Jackson is just a puppet for Fox News, depending on your personal politics. How do you tell the difference between somebody having opinions you don't agree with and somebody who’s been coerced into saying something?

RB: You can tell. You just listen for two minutes. If you have a brain, if you're aware, you'll know. Like they say, truth is available to the ears that can hear it. Just listen for two minutes and you can tell who's working for who, who's speaking for who, and why.


ESQ: And everybody in Hollywood is in some way being controlled by the government?

RB: The basic thing is, people want to get paid, so they'll say the things that get them paid, in entertainment or politics. For me, I just gave up all hope of being paid, and moved into a place of just doing what I do for free, and not paying people to help me but asking them to volunteer. Once you get away from wanting to get paid, you can actually say some true things. To me, that's what's great about America, we can do that. If we get off our lazy asses and stop doing everything to get paid.

ESQ: With the mind control thing, it's just hard to take seriously. It sounds so insane.

RB: Yeah, it sounds insane. But do you think it sounds insane that a message bounces off a satellite and goes everywhere in the world at the same second? We live with that kind of technology. People say things are insane because they don't fit a Hollywood script.

ESQ: Or it's too close to a Hollywood script.

RB: These are times where someone, a company, owns the patent for human life. That sounds pretty crazy too, right? But we're doing it, with cloning and all that stuff. In China they invented a bulldozer the size of a pin or smaller that they can inject into people and it'll eat the plaque out of an artery so the heart can pump blood. Does that sound insane?

ESQ: That actually does sound insane. A tiny bulldozer?

RB: That's a reality. Look it up. Crazy is to go "That doesn't exist."


ESQ: But some things really don't exist. Some conspiracy theories really are bonkers.

RB: Well that's also MKUltra at work. Calling people who are whistle-blowers dissenters or crazy, that is MKUltra. And you notice how they rush in to fill all the silence? People should just read. They can read and find the information for themselves. But a lot of them can't. Illiteracy is a huge problem in America. One in three adults in our country is illiterate. So people aren't going to read.

Nintendo Kid
Aug 4, 2011

by Smythe

I'd say quite a while. She was saying some pretty crazy stuff in the 2012 election.

Krotera
Jun 16, 2013

I AM INTO MATHEMATICAL CALCULATIONS AND MANY METHODS USED IN THE STOCK MARKET

AddMEonFacebook posted:

It's really depressing reading you actually because your poverty essentially forced you to give up the truth. I maybe have the luxury of the truth. Hard thought. It's actually obviously true that slaves who don't know the truth won't rebel.

I don't really see it as my responsibility to educate people. I just come here to joke around. I think it is a pretty good gimmick actually, and I think there is some lack of critical thought that goes into thinking about the government, by most people, and I'll have to admit, it wasn't until now how I fully appreciated how poverty and the physical hell they will put you through if you dis-obey forces you to change your mind as well, a soft death.

We have to fight on, though. We can't be afraid of poverty. I'm not afraid of that nor death nor speaking my view.

You keep saying you're just dealing with nonspecific things like "some lack of critical thought that goes into thinking about the government, by most people" but then you say things with fairly specific implications, like that Bush is a satanist, the CIA did 911, that you're surrounded by CIA plants who want to ruin you, and that the Government tortures people by making them poor. (?)

Can you be a little more consistent and stop obliquely hinting and saying "well that's not my position" when people respond to your implied position? If you're going to be crazy (or at least come off that way) you have to own it!

Krotera fucked around with this message at 04:13 on Nov 19, 2014

FuzzySkinner
May 23, 2012

Nintendo Kid posted:

I'd say quite a while. She was saying some pretty crazy stuff in the 2012 election.

Meh.

She's kind of had it rough, so I'll give her a pass. Was actually watching her get interviewed by Norm a while back.

Apparently she was in a coma for two weeks as a kid and it kind of knocked her off mentally. (she said she was really good at math as a kid, and after that? She lost it).

Also I guess Tom Arnold was a dick, and was the one spilling out every rumor behind their relationship to the "National Enquirer". One would definitly develop paranoid thoughts after being through that.

Her heart seems to be in the right place, and she seems more subdued as a person.

THE BOMBINATRIX
Jul 26, 2002

by Lowtax
ITT: Bunch of rubes that think that 9/11 actually happened.

Blade_of_tyshalle
Jul 12, 2009

If you think that, along the way, you're not going to fail... you're blind.

There's no one I've ever met, no matter how successful they are, who hasn't said they had their failures along the way.

I'm not even convinced today happened.

Evil Fluffy
Jul 13, 2009

Scholars are some of the most pompous and pedantic people I've ever had the joy of meeting.

She married Tom Arnold in 1990, so 24 years at the very least. The ending of Roseanne could not have been written by a sane person either.

Under the vegetable
Nov 2, 2004

by Smythe
http://www.qmed.com/mpmn/medtechpulse/nanobots-could-remove-arterial-plaque
The concept of tiny robots swimming through the bloodstream has existed for decades. The idea was made famous by the 1966 film Fantastic Voyage, in which a human team is shrunk to fit into a submarine measuring one micrometer to dissolve a patient’s blood clot. Nanotechnology expert Chris Phoenix even floated the idea of replacing blood with a network of robots known as the vasculoid. They system could hypothetically replicate the function of blood while staving off infections and cancer, and eliminating vascular diseases such as atherosclerosis.

Less far-fetched is a Ukrainian research project that proposes using nanobots to attack atherosclerotic plaque. At present, rotational atherectomy can be used to remove plaque, but can lead to problems such as an increased risk of heart attack during the procedure.


I guess she's wrong about the China part. Or maybe she's just erroneously correlating a bunch of things and she means rotational atherectomy, which is like a tiny drill, not a tiny bulldozer.

ErIog
Jul 11, 2001

:nsacloud:

She's been in and out of sanity since like forever.

Apthous
Nov 2, 2014

by XyloJW
I was 15 when 9/11 happened and all I could think of was this movie despite the fact that I had only seen the trailer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Ms91m1bCXQ

Sir Tonk
Apr 18, 2006
Young Orc

Prester John posted:

True story: The first time I started seeking treatment for my illness (I was homeless at the time) I went to get an evaluation from an agency that helps people with mental illness. The butterflies decorating the front of the building (known as the "Transformational Center") almost made me bolt on the spot though. You see, the butterflies were markings of a Monarch facility, and I realized how perfect of a place a mental illness screening facility would be for finding good candidates for the Monarch program.

Wait, are you talking about the villain from Venture Brothers?

edit

AVeryLargeRadish posted:

Two of your coworkers who you do not like are wearing red ties, this morning the president gave an address and was wearing a red tie, therefore your coworkers have been working for the government to discredit you.

This should be the thread title.

Sir Tonk fucked around with this message at 16:43 on Nov 20, 2014

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich

Sir Tonk posted:

Wait, are you talking about the villain from Venture Brothers?

Monarch is both a decently common name for mental healthcare providers and services, as well as the name of a supposed CIA mind control project.

AddMEonFacebook
Dec 3, 2012

by Cowcaster
Guys, lots of stuff is Monarch. Prestor John is just making stuff up, I think, to distract from the truth that 9/11 was planned.

Prester Jane
Nov 4, 2008

by Hand Knit

Sir Tonk posted:

Wait, are you talking about the villain from Venture Brothers?


I should have explained a bit more in detail here. "Monarch" is the supposed codename for a subdivision of the MK-ULTRA mind control program. I think Conspiracy Wiki sums it up best here.

Conspiracy Wiki posted:

Monarch Mind Control is a form of mind control which creates a mind control slave by utilizing the human brain's trauma response of dissociation to create a form of Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) wherein various triggers can cause the slave personality to surface and respond to commands given by the master ("Handler" in Monarch parlance).

...

The Monarch Mind Control designation was originally applied by the US Department of Defense to a sub-program under the CIA's MK-Ultra Program. However, the techniques employed in the Monarch programming system extend back further under various names, such as the Nazi marionette programming.

Even further back, the techniques used in Monarch programming can be traced to various generational Satanist families among European royalty. The MPD state created by the Monarch programming techniques were used to isolate the personality involved in Satanic rituals from a public face. Without this alternate personality, the nobles practicing Satanism inevitably went insane, so it's practice spread rapidly through the occult community.

It is unclear who first started practicing the MPD techniques as a way of creating mind control slaves rather than as a defense mechanism, but it is clear that the Nazis were using Electro-shock and binding to create slaves in the 1940s. After World War II, some German and Italian psychologists who were working on Marionette programming were brought to the United States to continue working on their research.

After the original development of the Monarch program inside of MK-Ultra, it has been adopted by other groups such as the Illuminati and the American entertainment industry. Very notably, since the 1970's the Disney corporation has been involved heavily in Monarch programming, and several of their films (especially Alice in Wonderland) are used as a base for Monarch programming.

Over 1 million Americans have had Monarch programming applied to them.[1]

Monarch programming is achieved through repeated abuse and torture, until the victim dissociates from reality into a fantasy world in their head. When that happens somehow an alternate personality is created, and the handler (abuser) can trigger this personality at any time.

Beta programming is sex kitten programming, used to create "ultimate prostitutes" as well as celebrities used to sell sex in the media to the masses. Making it look cool and awesome to be sexually abused and over used. They are made to be devoid of all sexual inhibitions. Take a look at Courtney Stodden.

Delta programming is used to program soldiers and patsys to carry out ritualistic murders.

So what had me freaked out was the possibility that I would be kidnapped, then tortured in such an indescribable fashion as to completely lose touch with reality, and then have false personalities implanted within me that could be triggered at any time without my knowledge. I knew that although Monarch was primarily designed to be used on children exceptions were made for anyone with latent psychic potential, and I also knew that my powers in the wrong hands would make me a very useful disposable assassin. I was terrified both of being tortured and of losing any sense of control over my life. (I was terrified these things would happen because of my budding and ill controlled psychic powers.) I can remember years before I sought out treatment joking with some of my fellow "psychic" friends about "One minute your telling a doctor all about the stress of trying to control these powers, and the next minute you are reading Catcher in the Rye and assassinating John Lennon".

Jazerus
May 24, 2011


Just out of curiosity, did you ever tell this "Transformational Center" that they were scaring off conspiracy theorists from seeking their help through their choice of decoration?

Prester Jane
Nov 4, 2008

by Hand Knit

Jazerus posted:

Just out of curiosity, did you ever tell this "Transformational Center" that they were scaring off conspiracy theorists from seeking their help through their choice of decoration?

I've toyed with the idea, but I don't know that there is much benefit to changing things. Frankly there isn't any set of symbols you could choose that wouldn't be interpreted as threatening by some portion of the population with mental illness, and on top of that my reaction to those particular symbols is not all that common in my experience. In two years of homelessness I met hundreds of Conspiracy Theorists of every possible description, but hardly ever have I met many that new what Monarch was or would have been freaked out by the presence of butterflies.

Edit: On top of that the Transformational Center is inside of a very large compound that you never see until you are already pretty invested in getting help/treatment. It isn;t something you just casually see 99% of the time. It would be literally impossible to explain without going into great detail because there just isn't anything like the "Haven for Hope" that I could draw a comparison too. It would take a whole separate thread to describe the Haven, really.

Prester Jane fucked around with this message at 21:11 on Nov 20, 2014

Prester Jane
Nov 4, 2008

by Hand Knit

Sharkie posted:

After you got help, did you ever go back and try to talk to conspiracy people, or revisit some of your old ideas, or did you just walk away from it without looking back?


Excellent question. Let me try and break this up a bit, as how I have handled my old beliefs is very different from how my old conspiracy buddies have reacted to my decisions.

As far as going back to my old ideas, I've never even considered it once. I recognize that the world simply does not work that way now. I don't think that way at all anymore, and many of the underlying assumptions about the world that I had that enabled those beliefs are changed now. It would be about as hard for me to go back to my old beliefs as it would for me to convert to worshiping Zeus. Conspiracy thinking on that level simply isn't a part of who I am anymore. (That said, I still struggle with delusions/magical thinking and invasive thoughts, but the medication weakens that sufficiently that I have taught myself to recognize my delusions and to not make any decisions based off them. Its hard but for now I find it manageable.) On those occasions I do stop and actually read some Conspiracy material these days I find it boring and honest to God laughably stupid. I also cringe a bit when I think about what this material used to mean to me, but I've decided to keep moving forwards no matter what and I just don't dwell on it long.

Now my old Conspiracy buddies are quite a different matter. Leaving the conspiracy mindset is viewed as something of a betrayal/copout. My old conspiracy buddies have treated me like I was that character in The Matrix that chooses to voluntarily get jacked back in. I am treated with a mixture of suspicion and pity, and have been accused of having sold out to the other side more than once. (Sometimes the accusations have been subtle, sometimes they have been very blunt. Thankfully these people are out of my life now, mostly because when I decided to seek treatment I also decided to move from Ohio to Texas, which proved to be an unexpected boon in keeping me away from their influences while I was extremely vulnerable and confused.) My experience has been that I am treated with outright suspicion very often, or at best treated with a sort of smug pity.

This post is exactly what I am talking about.

AddMEonFacebook posted:

It's really depressing reading you actually because your poverty essentially forced you to give up the truth. I maybe have the luxury of the truth. Hard thought. It's actually obviously true that slaves who don't know the truth won't rebel.

I don't really see it as my responsibility to educate people. I just come here to joke around. I think it is a pretty good gimmick actually, and I think there is some lack of critical thought that goes into thinking about the government, by most people, and I'll have to admit, it wasn't until now how I fully appreciated how poverty and the physical hell they will put you through if you dis-obey forces you to change your mind as well, a soft death.

We have to fight on, though. We can't be afraid of poverty. I'm not afraid of that nor death nor speaking my view.
I might even do a whole page long reply about this post in particular, but I would like to highlight a few things about it. (Talk about staring into a mirror, this read almost exactly like something I would have written a few years ago.)

First off I would argue that AddMeOnFacebook didn't write that post for me or for this thread, he wrote that post for himself, to reassure himself. Underneath what is written here is a sense of being special for knowing "truth". More importantly, he is choosing Truth despite the costs, and that makes him more noble. (Or at least that is how I would have been feeling in his shoes.)

Although AddMeOnFacebook may not really realize it, he is implying that I am a slave now compared to him because I have chosen to walk away from the Conspiracy mindset. ("a soft death") Right after discussing how my poverty forced me to give up truth he asserts that he would never do the same thing. ("We have to fight on, though. We can't be afraid of poverty. I'm not afraid of that nor death nor speaking my view") He is also implying some sort of pity in the sobering realization that perhaps enough pain can be brought down on people to force them to give up the truth. (" your poverty essentially forced you to give up the truth. I maybe have the luxury of the truth. Hard thought.")

Put all this together and AddMeOnFacebook seems to pity me for being beaten into admitting that there really are five lights. To him I gave in under the torture, a sad outcome. But he will struggle on no matter the cost and he will never give up truth even in the face of death. He would die proclaiming the truth of four lights. But perhaps he has the "luxury" of being able to fight for truth, (which I am sure calling it a luxury is a step forwards because I bet that he holds himself as somehow above the rest of the population because he chooses to face the ugly truth rather than hide.) so it is now up to him to fight on for those who (like myself) can't. I would say he is a good representation of the nicer spectrum of reactions I have gotten from my past associates.



Edit: I think the best way to sum up how my past associates have reacted to my seeking treatment is that they see it as an act of cowardice and weakness. I chose the path of least resistance, I chose to go along with the current and accept the damnation of the world in exchange for a little bit of comfort in life.

Prester Jane fucked around with this message at 00:01 on Nov 21, 2014

Guy Montag
Jun 24, 2005

Prester John posted:

Excellent question. Let me try and break this up a bit, as how I have handled my old beliefs is very different from how my old conspiracy buddies have reacted to my decisions.

[... Awesome :words:]

Thanks for sharing all of this Prester John, it is really interesting to get some insight.

I'm struck by just how little difference there is between the mindset you're describing and the mindset of conspiracy theorists without schizophrenia. Granted I'm sure lots of them have it and don't know it/deny it, or it is not obvious to an outside observer, but even so not every single one is mentally ill and it's almost like people can make themselves pseudo-schizophrenic by buying into this stuff too much.

A couple of questions: did you have any affinity for the 'gangstalking' side of this stuff? For those not familiar, gangstalking is the belief that the government (or someone) is engaged in a vast conspiracy to control/harass/drive you crazy with a combination of 'directed energy weapons' (which can cause pain or even kill) 'voice to skull technology' (making you hear voices in your head, supposedly with some kind of device) undetectable implants, and a series of seemingly random normal people who stalk the victim either to harass, intimidate, surveil, or influence. Basically it like a big long list of archetypal schizophrenia symptoms and behaviors. They also tend to tie in the Monarch/MKULTRA stuff already mentioned.

Probably the worst think about it is that the proponents of this 'gangstalking' theory proclaim over and over that they are not schizophrenic (which they hear a lot because it is basically identical). They even will deter people from treatment because 'they're in on it' or the drugs are 'mind control,' and they have set up various support networks and will use various pseudoscientific methods to 'block' or 'protect' each other from the gangstalkers.

Second question: Did you ever listen to Coast to Coast AM? I know you mentioned Alex Jones, what other theorists/outlets did you get into? David Icke? Larouche? Also, how much money do you think you spent on all the various media and products they peddled?

QuarkJets
Sep 8, 2008

I agree, these most recent posts have been incredibly informative and way more interesting than the rest of the thread.

I know a guy who's pretty heavily into the 9/11 trutherism stuff, and he's also anti-GMO, chemtrails, etc. I'm also aware that people who believe in one conspiracy are much more likely to believe in other conspiracies. Are there some examples of conspiracies that you or your friends thought were too outlandish? Did you ever find examples of conspiracies that you thought were deliberately created by some powerful party (the illuminati, the government, etc)?

Did you or anyone you know ever struggle with conflicting conspiracies? I'm asking about examples like the kind described by this study showing that people who believe in a conspiracy are much more likely to believe in another conspiracy related to the same events, even if those conspiracies result in contradictory conclusions. For example, people who believe that Osama bin Laden is still alive also believe that he was already dead before the raid occurred. Did you ever encounter conflicting conclusions like this, and what did you think about them? What did your other conspiracy-inclined friends think about them?

duck monster
Dec 15, 2004

Jazerus posted:

Just out of curiosity, did you ever tell this "Transformational Center" that they were scaring off conspiracy theorists from seeking their help through their choice of decoration?

I honestly suspect some psychs have no idea how to factor in conspiratorial thinking into their reasoning about mental illness.

I used to work for a company called "Global Mind Screen", as a contractor, developing software used in psychometric testing by medical professionals.

I remember saying "You do realise schizophrenics and manics will run off screaming at the very sight of something called global mind screen, yes?". They where shocked. It never occured to them.

And the kept the name anyway. Before leaving I suggested augmenting their butterfly logo with an eye pyramid, just to complete the circle on that name.

duck monster fucked around with this message at 05:19 on Nov 21, 2014

AddMEonFacebook
Dec 3, 2012

by Cowcaster
Smug pity and suspicion is all you deserve. You either were an over-the-top nut that needed real help or you did betray your cause - although I can understand since they force you into poverty for it.

BBJoey
Oct 31, 2012

Your gimmick is bad.

QuarkJets
Sep 8, 2008

AddMEonFacebook posted:

Smug pity and suspicion is all you deserve. You either were an over-the-top nut that needed real help or you did betray your cause - although I can understand since they force you into poverty for it.

I probably shouldn't engage like this, but are you aware that many conspiracy theorists believe conflicting conspiracy theories, like believing the idea that Princess Diana was murdered (by whoever) while simultaneously believing that she's still alive?

AddMEonFacebook
Dec 3, 2012

by Cowcaster
Honestly, I don't give two shillings about that. I can use a structured logical model to evaluate claims based on evidence. I don't need you giving me your twentieth rate psychology. Who believes such a thing really? I mean - give me a real name of a person. What an incredible strawman!

How about this: are you aware that there are over one billion people without access to clean water?

AddMEonFacebook fucked around with this message at 10:07 on Nov 21, 2014

AddMEonFacebook
Dec 3, 2012

by Cowcaster
Or to bring it down to your level: are you aware that politicians are doo-doo heads?

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snorch
Jul 27, 2009

AddMEonFacebook posted:

I can use a structured logical model to evaluate claims based on evidence.

Show your work.

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