Germany Thread: KEIN FASCHISMUS LEUDE BIDDE

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Default Settings: May 29, 2001; Keep your 'lectric eye on me, babe

Germany Discussion (closed sundays): Alles Dichter und Denker

# ? Dec 11, 2014 12:44

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# ? May 17, 2024 06:18

Zwille: Aug 18, 2006; * _{For the Ghost Who Walks Funny}

Germany Stammtisch (closed sundays): Alles Richter und Henker

# ? Dec 11, 2014 13:13

e X: Feb 23, 2013; cool but crude

Finding a title is not really necessary, since this is hardly a hub of heated discussion.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 13:19

Badly Jester: Apr 9, 2010; Bitches!

Duzzy Funlop posted:

Since we had an actual and unironic argument of ~are freedoms~ over the last couple of pages, I'd be all for this, but I'd also need an appropriate german translation for that expression with the very same amout of irony attached to it.

"Sie hassen unsere freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung."

Fun fact: when the state employs you, even as a lowly HiWi at the university, you have to sign a paper stating that you vow to uphold the freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung in your work. My work is making copies. Also, I'm not allowed to spill state secrets or release prisoners.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 13:32

Cingulate: Oct 23, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

Badly Jester posted:

"Sie hassen unsere freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung."

Fun fact: when the state employs you, even as a lowly HiWi at the university, you have to sign a paper stating that you vow to uphold the freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung in your work. My work is making copies. Also, I'm not allowed to spill state secrets or release prisoners.

I actually learned recently that it's also treason to spill what you believe to be state secrets, even if it turns out you're wrong and it's trivial and public.

Not as good as the Gefangenenbefreiungsklausel, but still.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 14:10

ArchangeI: Jul 15, 2010

Badly Jester posted:

"Sie hassen unsere freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung."

Fun fact: when the state employs you, even as a lowly HiWi at the university, you have to sign a paper stating that you vow to uphold the freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung in your work. My work is making copies. Also, I'm not allowed to spill state secrets or release prisoners.

When I worked as a HiWi, in two different departments, I never had to sign such a thing. I was even asked if I had signed a vow, said no, and still didn't have to sign anything but my work contract. I guess that means I'm legally allowed to free all prisoners, talk about the Bundeswehr's darkest secrets (its not an army, its an employment program for people who can't hack it on the labour market!) and start a revolution.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 16:21

Mightypeon: Oct 10, 2013; Putin apologist- assume all uncited claims are from Russia Today or directly from FSB.

key phrases: Poor plucky little Russia, Spheres of influence, The West is Worse, they was asking for it.

Libluini posted:

The secret of our trains: The Deutsche Bahn defines a "Versp�tung" as a train coming late by more than five minutes.

Turns out if you use special German train time your trains will always be on time! (No, really.)

Edit:

In welcher Jahreszeit hat die Deutsche Bahn die meisten Versp�tungen?

-Fr�hling, Sommer, Herbst und Winter.

(In which season does the Deutsche Bahn has the most late arrivals?

-Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter.)

I think thats a callback to an Old East German/Soviet joke:

Question: "Which for factors most strongly repress the growth of Communist agriculture?"
Awnser:"Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter."

# ? Dec 11, 2014 17:13

Mightypeon: Oct 10, 2013; Putin apologist- assume all uncited claims are from Russia Today or directly from FSB.

key phrases: Poor plucky little Russia, Spheres of influence, The West is Worse, they was asking for it.

ArchangeI posted:

When I worked as a HiWi, in two different departments, I never had to sign such a thing. I was even asked if I had signed a vow, said no, and still didn't have to sign anything but my work contract. I guess that means I'm legally allowed to free all prisoners, talk about the Bundeswehr's darkest secrets (its not an army, its an employment program for people who can't hack it on the labour market!) and start a revolution.

Such things could however happen under certain circumstances in which certain CDU ministries are involved in financing the project.
I could also see it happening in the Bundeswehr universities.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 17:19

Libluini: May 18, 2012; I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...; Grimey Drawer

Mightypeon posted:

I think thats a callback to an Old East German/Soviet joke:

Question: "Which for factors most strongly repress the growth of Communist agriculture?"
Awnser:"Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter."

Just shows how people in East and West aren't that different.

Like minds think alike.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 19:19

suck my woke dick: Oct 10, 2012; I CANNOT EJACULATE WITHOUT SEEING NATIVE AMERICANS BRUTALISED!

Put this cum-loving slave on ignore immediately!

Zwille posted:

Germany Stammtisch (closed sundays): Alles Richter und Henker

# ? Dec 11, 2014 19:46

GABA ghoul: Oct 29, 2011

Badly Jester posted:

"Sie hassen unsere freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung."

Fun fact: when the state employs you, even as a lowly HiWi at the university, you have to sign a paper stating that you vow to uphold the freiheitlich-demokratische Grundordnung in your work. My work is making copies. Also, I'm not allowed to spill state secrets or release prisoners.

It's even funnier in Bavaria, where you have to say the pledge aloud and it needs to be witnessed and confirmed by a civil servant. Absolutely no crossed fingers and mumbling allowed.

quote:

a) The person attending has this day sworn the following oath, in accordance with Art. 187 of the Constitution of Bavaria, by repeating the words of the oath:
"I swear loyalty to the Constitution of the Free State of Bavaria, so help me God."
This shall be confirmed below.

Probably very awkward for foreign exchange students.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 21:10

Torrannor: Apr 27, 2013; ---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Remember that Bavaria is the state that was forbidden to hang crosses in class rooms by the Constitutional Court, and they do it anyway.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 21:55

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

waitwhatno posted:

It's even funnier in Bavaria, where you have to say the pledge aloud and it needs to be witnessed and confirmed by a civil servant. Absolutely no crossed fingers and mumbling allowed.

I had to do this and the civil servant barely hid his amusement.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 21:58

Libluini: May 18, 2012; I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...; Grimey Drawer

Torrannor posted:

Remember that Bavaria is the state that was forbidden to hang crosses in class rooms by the Constitutional Court, and they do it anyway.

I have this giant saw in my backyard and nothing to do today, let's saw Bavaria off from the real Germany already

# ? Dec 11, 2014 22:31

Default Settings: May 29, 2001; Keep your 'lectric eye on me, babe

A dark, sick corner of me wants to see Bavaria and Austria unified, just to witness the unavoidable childish political bickering between Munich and Vienna.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 22:40

e X: Feb 23, 2013; cool but crude

Default Settings posted:

A dark, sick corner of me wants to see Bavaria and Austria unified, just to witness the unavoidable childish political bickering between Munich and Vienna.

Reminds me of the 27th canton of Switzerland idea.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 22:47

System Metternich: Feb 28, 2010; But what did he mean by that?

Default Settings posted:

A dark, sick corner of me wants to see Bavaria and Austria unified, just to witness the unavoidable childish political bickering between Munich and Vienna.

Well, it would just mean a return to the natural state of things :colbert:

# ? Dec 11, 2014 22:50

e X: Feb 23, 2013; cool but crude

Is there actually a Greater Austria movement? poo poo, do you have monarchists? Because if 40 odd years are enough, you got to have them.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 22:53

icantfindaname: Jul 1, 2008

S�dtirol

# ? Dec 11, 2014 22:57

icantfindaname: Jul 1, 2008

Default Settings posted:

A dark, sick corner of me wants to see Bavaria and Austria unified, just to witness the unavoidable childish political bickering between Munich and Vienna.

You could also have Baden-W�rttemberg unified with Switzerland, for extra laffs

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:00

System Metternich: Feb 28, 2010; But what did he mean by that?

e X posted:

poo poo, do you have monarchists?

lol

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMRPuiv7EJ0

(This was filed under "totally not a state funeral, you guys", btw)

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:01

bronin: Oct 15, 2009; use it or throw it away

Default Settings posted:

A dark, sick corner of me wants to see Bavaria and Austria unified, just to witness the unavoidable childish political bickering between Munich and Vienna.

Make the Allg�u a sovereign little state kinda like Liechtenstein or whatever. Only with cheese and cows instead of foreign money. Then I'm in.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:08

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:12

Default Settings: May 29, 2001; Keep your 'lectric eye on me, babe

The Green party actually made a parliamentary inquiry on why exactly a honour guard formation of the Austrian army leads the funeral procession of someone who never held a public office. Somehow nothing ever came of that. :catholic:

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:13

Libluini: May 18, 2012; I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...; Grimey Drawer

e X posted:

Is there actually a Greater Austria movement? poo poo, do you have monarchists? Because if 40 odd years are enough, you got to have them.

Eh, they're everywhere, like a pest. At least our own nobles up here in the cold north aren't doing anything to entice them. If you wanted to, you could go visit the Duke of Celle in Niedersachsen, for example.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:13

ArchangeI: Jul 15, 2010

Libluini posted:

Eh, they're everywhere, like a pest. At least our own nobles up here in the cold north aren't doing anything to entice them. If you wanted to, you could go visit the Duke of Celle in Niedersachsen, for example.

I was still a little peeved to find out that the ancient house of Mecklenburg has died out in the male line and that we would now be a part of Prussia.

First the DDR disbands and now this

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:22

Libluini: May 18, 2012; I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...; Grimey Drawer

ArchangeI posted:

I was still a little peeved to find out that the ancient house of Mecklenburg has died out in the male line and that we would now be a part of Prussia.

First the DDR disbands and now this

At least you got to become part of Prussia peacefully. The Kingdom of Hannover for some reason allied with far away Austria and got bitchslapped into submission. Our last king then ran away to Austria and left us to be annexed by the Prussians.

The real sad thing is the descendants of our late king are still around today, doing stupid poo poo liking beating up journalists and pissing at exhibitions at the millenial fair. So we not only lost our kingdom, the last in the line of our kings is a retarded rear end in a top hat.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:38

System Metternich: Feb 28, 2010; But what did he mean by that?

ArchangeI posted:

I was still a little peeved to find out that the ancient house of Mecklenburg has died out in the male line and that we would now be a part of Prussia.

First the DDR disbands and now this

poo poo, that's a rough deal.

Libluini posted:

At least you got to become part of Prussia peacefully. The Kingdom of Hannover for some reason allied with far away Austria and got bitchslapped into submission. Our last king then ran away to Austria and left us to be annexed by the Prussians.

The real sad thing is the descendants of our late king are still around today, doing stupid poo poo liking beating up journalists and pissing at exhibitions at the millenial fair. So we not only lost our kingdom, the last in the line of our kings is a retarded rear end in a top hat.

quote:

Die Zigarettenmarke Lucky Strike ver�ffentlichte ohne Erlaubnis Ernst Augusts im M�rz 2000 eine Werbeanzeige mit einer eingedr�ckten Zigarettenschachtel und dem Text �War das Ernst? Oder August?�. Eine deswegen von Ernst August angestrengte Klage wurde im Juni 2008 vom Bundesgerichtshof abgewiesen.[18] Im April 2012 wurde bekannt, dass Ernst August in dieser Sache schon seit 2009 beim Europ�ischen Gerichtshof f�r Menschenrechte gegen die Bundesrepublik Deutschland klagt.[19][20] Er sieht seine Menschenrechte dadurch verletzt, dass deutsche Gerichte die Werbeanzeige f�r zul�ssig erkl�rt haben. Derartige Werbetexte w�rden ihn als �brutalen Schl�ger� an den �sozialen Pranger� stellen.[21]

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:45

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

Libluini posted:

The real sad thing is the descendants of our late king are still around today, doing stupid poo poo liking beating up journalists and pissing at exhibitions at the millenial fair. So we not only lost our kingdom, the last in the line of our kings is a retarded rear end in a top hat.

What angers me even more is that there are still people who give a poo poo about them and admire them etc.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:48

System Metternich: Feb 28, 2010; But what did he mean by that?

Lucy Heartfilia posted:

What angers me even more is that there are still people who give a poo poo about them and admire them etc.

Reading your posts here and in the Eastern Europe thread I sometimes wonder if you're ever not angry :v:

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:53

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

Nicht immer, aber immer �fter.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:55

Duzzy Funlop: Jan 13, 2010; Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?

Seriously, you need to take a breather every once in a while and just go all que cera, cera or something.
Constant infuriation will be the end of you. I speak from experience.

# ? Dec 11, 2014 23:57

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

Nah, I just love ranting and bitching. It's fun.

# ? Dec 12, 2014 00:03

Grendels Dad: Mar 5, 2011; Popular culture has passed you by.

Libluini posted:

The secret of our trains: The Deutsche Bahn defines a "Versp�tung" as a train coming late by more than five minutes.

Turns out if you use special German train time your trains will always be on time! (No, really.)

Also, after it is announced that "Der Zug f�hrt jetzt ein" it does not count as a "Versp�tung", even if the train takes fifteen minutes to enter the station.

# ? Dec 12, 2014 10:27

Torrannor: Apr 27, 2013; ---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Libluini posted:

The secret of our trains: The Deutsche Bahn defines a "Versp�tung" as a train coming late by more than five minutes.

Turns out if you use special German train time your trains will always be on time! (No, really.)

Edit:

In welcher Jahreszeit hat die Deutsche Bahn die meisten Versp�tungen?

-Fr�hling, Sommer, Herbst und Winter.

(In which season does the Deutsche Bahn has the most late arrivals?

-Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter.)

If I recall correctly, in England they define a train coming late as being at least fifteen minutes late, while it's apparently only 1 minute in Japan. So I would say we are fairly mediocre in this regard.

# ? Dec 12, 2014 12:38

Cingulate: Oct 23, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

Complaining about the Bahn being late is the most German thing ever, slightly in front of being irrationally scared of nuclear power and exceptionally bad football fan chants.

# ? Dec 12, 2014 13:52

System Metternich: Feb 28, 2010; But what did he mean by that?

Cingulate posted:

exceptionally bad football fan chants.

Not always :colbert:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6J89d5Mqa-w

# ? Dec 12, 2014 15:03

Goa Tse-tung: Feb 11, 2008; ;3; Yams Fan

Cingulate posted:

exceptionally bad football fan chants.

Du kannst nach hause fahrn. Repeated 1000 times. :colbert:

# ? Dec 12, 2014 15:36

Libluini: May 18, 2012; I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...; Grimey Drawer

Torrannor posted:

If I recall correctly, in England they define a train coming late as being at least fifteen minutes late, while it's apparently only 1 minute in Japan. So I would say we are fairly mediocre in this regard.

Well, do they also tell people a train needing 15 minutes to enter the station "doesn't count as being late"? :v:

Also let me tell you about that one time when I came back from a funeral in Cologne and my trains started running up more and more delays on my way back until I ended halfway to home in Bielefeld at around midnight, three hours late. Of course in Bielefeld, no train was available until morning, so in effect I was about 8 hours late.

Something like this happened to me three times by now. Nearly every time I'm travelling longer then 1-2 hours by train, the Deutsche Bahn suddenly fucks up, just for me. :shepicide:

# ? Dec 12, 2014 15:45

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# ? May 17, 2024 06:18

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

I once was 2 hours late and that was already bad. I have a feeling that the Bahn gives lower priority to trains that are already late by the way.

# ? Dec 12, 2014 15:59

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