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ExtrudeAlongCurve posted:I bring this up because you have mentioned your plan is to breastfeed, which will save oodles of money and also be the best option. But if it ends up not working out for your wife, not only do you need to not have that be a financial death sentence but you need to make sure your wife knows it's not her fault and not make her feel guilty that it's not happening for her. We're not supposed to emptyquote, so just seconding this. Are you prepared if you have to pay for formula, or rent an industrial strength breast pump from the hospital for about 80 bucks a month? These are things you have to think about, and you clearly don't.
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Dec 9, 2014 18:58
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Hey KG, first time caller long time listener. I'm curiuos what the target amount for your emergency savings is? I see in the OP that it is a 3 month buffer so the $4,700 you have banked now is what? 1-2 month buffer? Since you are approaching this goal, I wonder if it may be beneficial to start throwing some extra cash at your debt. For example, you allocated an extra $240 towards your emergency fund in October. Why not throw that at one of your loans? Might give you a little boost to see the loan going down more than just the minimum payments Just something to chew on Keep fighting the good fight.
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Dec 9, 2014 18:59
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Shats Basoon posted:Hey KG, first time caller long time listener. Based on the recent budgets, I would set the monthly burn rate to 3k, and say at least 6k (2mo) is needed, and 9k would probably be best. I feel like the Dave Ramsey 1k and GO HARD ON DEBT is a little foolhardy when you have so many life dependancies (dogs, new born, unstable jobs (not saying they're unstable, but all jobs are unstable to a point), etc). Right now they have about $2600 in total cash savings plus $2200 in the HSA, I believe. SiGmA_X fucked around with this message at 19:48 on Dec 9, 2014 |
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Dec 9, 2014 19:43
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SiGmA_X posted:You're getting ahead of things. KG has a baby due in 2mo. He needs to continue amassing monies at a crazed hoarders rate until ~8wks after birth. Then he and Kwife must decide (I would do the deciding now, or sometime before birth at least?) what they feel comfortable with keeping around for emergencies and then throw the difference at debt. Right around there... a little more in savings since we have some of next month's expenses ready. Thanks for the support guys. I think I'm a little on edge right now and I'm seeing people being a little harder on me than they are. Hawkgirl I think you make some good points. I definitely like the whole positive reinforcement thing more. I'm extremely hard on myself if I don't meet goals, and I think more people piling it on just makes me feel like crap. Or whatever, I'm not trying to get all E/N ya know. Nocheez: yes I'm working on some cheaper hobbies. Right now my wife and I are restoring an old antique dresser for the baby room. The dresser was free and I think supplies were around $30. Been playing the drums a ton too. Good points all around thanks. Thanks for the baby advice. Sounds like I've got some stuff to learn. Also this: CuddleChunks posted:Hellooooo new business card! We're looking into doing some birthing classes soon. Will online classes work for that? They're cheaper/free and we wouldn't have to spend 8 hours in a hospital on a Saturday. Breast pump my wife is researching currently. Our insurance does cover it; I think she may actually be handling that today but I'm not entirely sure. Cat litter I take care of for sure while my wife is pregnant.
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Dec 9, 2014 20:26
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Someone else can chime in if they know of better/cheaper, but we used Target formula. Wife breastfed as long as she could first. Target was inexpensive and I have a hard time believing different brands of formulas are that different (beyond the label differences, some are for gassiness, etc.)
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Dec 9, 2014 23:09
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Our 4 week old is on a new formula that is 3x the cost of what started her on  Just hope if you plan on bottle feeding that your baby doesn't have any allergies or digestive issues.
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Dec 10, 2014 14:06
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OK the formula talk got me thinking: I priced out the expected expenses of our baby's first year using this calculator: http://www.babycenter.com/baby-cost-calculator Using cloth diapers, my wife staying at home (hence no babysitting costs), assuming $105/mo of formula, and some of the things we still need to pick up, we're looking at an average cost of $260/mo over the first year. This does include clothes, toys, etc. We would have to shop used on much of this stuff. Here are some scenarios based off that calculator: Scenario 1: My wife stays at home while she picks up a new skill whenever she can (maybe 6+ mos), and not working at all. , and we priced Gold tier Healthcare.gov plan at ~$600/mo. Savings ~$600/mo after cutting discretionary by $100 ea/mo. We could potentially save $200/mo more if we chose the worst tier of insurance, and there are some plans in between. Scenario 2: My wife stays at her job while she picks up a new skill whenever she can. We would keep the same insurance we have now. Accounting for child care costs with my sister. $1800/mo in savings, plus HSA assuming we cut discretionary by $100 ea/mo. Scenario 3: My wife quits her current job very soon, she starts picking up a new skill immediately, we pick up a healthcare.gov plan at roughly the same price but without a subsidy (worse insurance, same price basically). Savings ~$860/mo assuming we cut discretionary by $100 ea/mo. 3 also involves her picking up a part time job after the baby is born and after a few months of rest and baby bonding while still learning her new skill when she can. Expenses for the baby would then go up some as well because cloth diapers may not be as viable. But so would income obviously. Just trying to figure out if my wife can quit her job. Her schedule is still making us both miserable. This coming Friday/Saturday/Sunday/Monday for example she has the closing shift. This means she could potentially be working from 2:00pm until midnight (as she did 2 days ago). When she closes on weekdays we see eachother for maybe 1-2 hours a day if I want to stay up late. A part time job is definitely something we want to consider. Does everyone agree that $600/mo in excess income for savings is skimming it a little too closely? As far as the part time job there is a grocery store down the street from our house, and she has a reference through a previous coworker who works there currently. She has like 7 years grocery experience so she could probably pick up a gig as a part time cashier during the week only. Again while working towards something better (which she absolutely wants to do, she seems very motivated). And if the grocery store doesn't work out there's some other places. Mostly in the food industry. Further into town but still close there is her old job (which she has a great rapport with, and there's a very high chance they'd take her back), some places like Bed Bath & Beyond, World Market, etc. So some options basically. The best thing for our finances RIGHT NOW is definitely her keeping her job, but I don't know if that's the best decision for us long term. I also don't know if any scenario except for #2 is actually feasible. Edit: We got savings and expense numbers directly from our budget and adjusted them to the scenarios, and then cut gas by $65/mo (half) since we would be driving far less if she didn't commute 40 miles a day. Scenario 2 does not account for the gasoline cut. Edit 2: Oh yea this also assumes $50/mo for life insurance for me and $25/mo for life insurance for her. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 18:28 on Dec 10, 2014 |
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Dec 10, 2014 17:36
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What if the kid is fussy and won't eat the cheap formula, your wife is too stressed to handle a second job, the kid gets a probably-a-cold-but-you-see-a-doctor-just-in-case, the cat starts puking so you need to bring it to the vet, and your sister has a really lovely month so you need to spend time with her? And then next month the car needs maintenance, the dog starts wrecking things because you haven't had the time to take it on walks, the baby classes are at inconvenient times except for the ones that cost money, and you have to do laundry three times a week between the stressed animals and the baby being colicky?
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Dec 10, 2014 18:12
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Knyteguy posted:OK the formula talk got me thinking: Did you just guess that sounded like enough, or is there some website telling you to malnourish your child?
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Dec 10, 2014 18:15
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Antifreeze Head posted:Did you just guess that sounded like enough, or is there some website telling you to malnourish your child? I'm probably misquoting that; it was an answered question on a product page (which they admitted could vary), and doing the math based on the price per oz of the formula equaled roughly what the baby calculator defaulted to. So basically price right, ounces wrong. I think. If anyone has suggestions on monthly formula cost it'd probably be better than what I'm trying to do. The cheaper Gerber formula is $.91/oz, the best selling formula was $1.10/oz.
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Dec 10, 2014 18:23
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Antifreeze Head posted:Did you just guess that sounded like enough, or is there some website telling you to malnourish your child? Yeah that really stuck out to me too. A cursory Google search says this: "In the first four to six months when your baby isn't eating any solids, here's a simple rule of thumb: Offer 2.5 ounces of formula per pound of body weight each day. For example, if your baby weighs 6 pounds, you'll give her about 15 ounces of formula in a 24-hour period." Formula is very expensive. Adds up fast.
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Dec 10, 2014 18:27
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Edited that out. It would cost roughly $23/mo @ 1 ounce a day so I simply misquoted. But yes formula is way more expensive than I expected.
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Dec 10, 2014 18:29
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The whole learning a new skill thing for your wife is a long shot. What has stopped her from doing that in the past 3+ years? Why is it going to be all the sudden easier and/or is she going to be more motivated to do it while looking after a baby? If you hit the "baby jackpot" and your child sleeps regularly and soundly after a few months it's feasible, but is most likely still going to be a stretch. Also isn't your insurance going to go up no matter what? Typically insurance rates are single, single+spouse, family. Family is normally considerably more expensive depending on where you work as it covers 1+ children not just 1. EDIT: Wasn't she going to try transcription or something at some point? And that lasted for like a week? Or maybe she's still doing it? Bugamol fucked around with this message at 18:45 on Dec 10, 2014 |
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Dec 10, 2014 18:40
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Knyteguy posted:Edited that out. It would cost roughly $23/mo @ 1 ounce a day so I simply misquoted. But yes formula is way more expensive than I expected. I know you edited it out, and you're going to brush this away, but your estimates for formula were off what it will actually cost by like 20x. Your baby needs much more than an ounce of formula a day. This is exactly the sort of thing people are trying to tell you about, but every few days you come in all cavalier linking websites you've barely read and saying how well you have things in hand. "I know all about baby budgeting because I put some numbers into this webpage! $23/mo for formula, done." I'm genuinely afraid that this baby is going to kick your budget in the balls, hard
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Dec 10, 2014 18:52
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Inverse Icarus posted:I know you edited it out, and you're going to brush this away, but your estimates for formula were off what it will actually cost by like 20x. Your baby needs much more than an ounce of formula a day. No no, the price was correct @ $105 I just put down the wrong number of ounces. The number of ounces eaten per day and my cost calculation didn't add up. I didn't expect formula to be $23/mo or something like that. I did the research last night and I remembered the cost not the ounces.
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Dec 10, 2014 18:56
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Inverse Icarus posted:I know you edited it out, and you're going to brush this away, but your estimates for formula were off what it will actually cost by like 20x. Your baby needs much more than an ounce of formula a day. No, his price was actually quite close. Just like he said. Infant formula will not cost twenty times his estimate, but his estimate was way off. Using the 15 oz for a 6 lb baby posted earlier and this stuff, which is on the expensive side, the $105 is pretty close, at least for the first while. A little on the low side maybe if the baby needs the expensive stuff, but certainly not anywhere near the $460 or $2100 per month you're alleging it will cost.
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Dec 10, 2014 19:08
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Antifreeze Head posted:No, his price was actually quite close. Just like he said. Infant formula will not cost twenty times his estimate, but his estimate was way off. My daughter had to go on prescription formula that ran us about $300-340/month.
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Dec 10, 2014 19:38
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April posted:My daughter had to go on prescription formula that ran us about $300-340/month. I'm sorry to hear that.
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Dec 10, 2014 19:41
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April posted:My daughter had to go on prescription formula that ran us about $300-340/month. Also sorry to hear that. Assuming something similar happens our margin of error is down to roughly $350.
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Dec 10, 2014 19:51
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Just a comment about your health plan. You must stay on an HSA plan next year, otherwise you're going to have to unwind your contributions for 2014. I'm at work and phone posting so I don't feel like looking up at the details, but that's the gist of it. We can chat health plans and cost comparisons sometime soon, but the good news is you don't have to do anything until your wife quits, besides change to Family once your child comes. To sound like the other posters, but this was the first thought I had when I read your post: why is your wife thinking she'll pick up a new skill now but she hasn't wanted to for the last X years? She is going to have no time to learn a new skill right after the child arrives. Neither are you.
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Dec 10, 2014 20:58
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SiGmA_X posted:Just a comment about your health plan. You must stay on an HSA plan next year, otherwise you're going to have to unwind your contributions for 2014. I'm at work and phone posting so I don't feel like looking up at the details, but that's the gist of it. Can you explain (when not at work) because I am not following this?
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Dec 11, 2014 01:45
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SiGmA_X posted:Just a comment about your health plan. You must stay on an HSA plan next year, otherwise you're going to have to unwind your contributions for 2014. I'm at work and phone posting so I don't feel like looking up at the details, but that's the gist of it.
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Dec 11, 2014 03:12
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Knyteguy - How much are you guys contributing this year to the HSA? And when did your insurance plan start?spwrozek posted:Can you explain (when not at work) because I am not following this? quote:http://www.irs.gov/publications/p969/ar02.html#en_US_2013_publink1000204045 Easychair Bootson posted:Not to hijack (actually that's exactly what I'm doing) but I'm changing jobs in January and had the bright idea to throw a bunch of money in my HSA this year (was previously contributing very litte) before I switch to a job without an HSA (a non-HDHP). Am I somehow screwing myself? I asked about this in another thread recently and nobody called me out on it, so I just wanted to make sure. Because it seems like a no-brainer. This link helped me understand it a bit more: https://www.tangohealth.com/posts/consumer-directed-health-plans/irs-contribution-limits-last-month-rule-for-hsas-part-three/
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Dec 11, 2014 05:32
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Also if your wife quits + baby you should be able to change your tax deductions and get more money from your paycheck each month. Just make sure you don't overshoot and end up with a bill at the end of the year.
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Dec 11, 2014 17:09
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SiGmA_X posted:OT is at least 62% of what happens in all threads in BFC, no worries! How long have you been covered by the HSA/HDHP plan? Sounds like it may be a few years, so I think you should be OK. I wouldn't contribute over $279 in January unless you remain covered. Instead of contributing $1000 this month is there any reason I shouldn't max it out? Am I oversimplifying by looking at it as a short-term investment with a guaranteed ~30% return? Assuming I plan to use it for all eligible expenses in 2015 and beyond.
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Dec 11, 2014 17:34
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Gonna let my wife answer the new skill questions, since I think that's rightfully her domain. If she says she's motivated and she'll try for it though, then I believe she'll do it. She gave me the same opportunity.SiGmA_X posted:Knyteguy - How much are you guys contributing this year to the HSA? And when did your insurance plan start? Thanks for the info Sig.  Insurance has been active since July, at least our first contribution was made then (meaning my wife probably signed up a week or so before that). E: clarity Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 20:50 on Dec 11, 2014 |
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Dec 11, 2014 20:36
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No one is questioning her motivation, or even yours. We have a saying where I work, when looking at individual performance issues: is it willingness or ability? You guys aren't short on willingness but you often let that cloud your perception of ability. She might be incredibly motivated to pick up programming but will she have the ability while dealing with a newborn? That's harder to say. Another somewhat cliched saying that you should take to heart: hope for the best, plan for the worst. I'm sure when your boss is giving clients timelines he isn't assuming everything will go perfectly, he's adding additional padding to time estimates to account for the unpredictable, sometimes the unavoidable, and sometimes just the unpleasantness of realizing you spent half a week going down the wrong path. That should be the same approach you take to personal finances -- expect that things will go wrong. Plan for things costing 50% more than anticipated, your wife taking several additional months to return to work, poo poo like that. If it doesn't happen then hey you have a bunch of extra money you can put towards debt, or savings, or whatever, but if things go sideways this approach means you can weather a rough patch without the considerable worry financial strain adds. That's the mindset people have been trying to get you to understand.
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Dec 11, 2014 23:50
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bringer posted:No one is questioning her motivation, or even yours. We have a saying where I work, when looking at individual performance issues: is it willingness or ability? My question here is since I can't go back in time and pick up a new skill when it would've been more feasible and since it may be unrealistic to pursue with a new born, where do I go from here? I worked really hard on my resume and interview skills to get out of my previous job and into a job with better pay and benefits, and I am proud of that but the hours of this new job are really hard on our family now and I fear will be even harder with the baby. Right now I think it would probably be best to stay put until after the baby is born and then use part of my maternity leave to find a job that's closer/ has weekends off/(possibly part time). Basically I'm really unsure of what I can do to continue to contribute to bettering our financial situation while having a more normal schedule that fits better with our life.
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Dec 12, 2014 00:05
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A big question that I'm not sure has been asked is do you plan on having more kids? And if so when?
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Dec 12, 2014 00:37
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I think the best way to answer this is to ask yourself would you rather spend your free time finding a new job or learning a skill to help you find a better job? The new job might be more helpful now, but you'd be selling future Janus Owl short...
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Dec 12, 2014 00:48
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Bugamol posted:A big question that I'm not sure has been asked is do you plan on having more kids? And if so when? This is a hard question to answer because as it stands we're probably only going to have the one. I can't say that we'll feel the same way in a couple of years though, but if we do decide to have one more it probably won't be for another few years. Veskit posted:I think the best way to answer this is to ask yourself would you rather spend your free time finding a new job or learning a skill to help you find a better job? The new job might be more helpful now, but you'd be selling future Janus Owl short... My question in response to yours is based on what you've seen of our budget/ spending trend, is it even possible for me to pursue a new skill without jeopardizing are financial security? I think that's what KG and I both wanted to know. Can I pursue a skill to obtain a better job without damning us financially in the interim? The idea of staying in retail is becoming depressing and my previous job hunts have shown that with my experience it is difficult to get a job outside of this field with my work experience.
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Dec 12, 2014 01:09
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Janus Owl posted:My question in response to yours is based on what you've seen of our budget/ spending trend, is it even possible for me to pursue a new skill without jeopardizing are financial security? I think that's what KG and I both wanted to know. Can I pursue a skill to obtain a better job without damning us financially in the interim? The idea of staying in retail is becoming depressing and my previous job hunts have shown that with my experience it is difficult to get a job outside of this field with my work experience. Pursue a new skill without jeopardizing financial security? I thought we were talking about your sanity. You could hold down a job, learn new skills and between child care knyte and a little bit of free time you could do all that. Then it comes down to how motivated and how much free time do you need in your life. If the answer is very and no free time, yeah, take some classes, learn programming raise a family and work.
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Dec 12, 2014 01:18
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KG, have you considered teaching your wife the basics of coding and then hiring her as an unpaid intern* for a few months? In the short term that would hit your finances bad, but in the long term it could work out really well. * Obviously it'd be better for her to be paid, but trying to be realistic here since she would be a total newbie.
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Dec 12, 2014 01:50
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Assuming we're talking about programming still. Not everyone is cut out for it. Don't do something purely for the money. You're just going to end up burned out and bitter. My bias would be to keep your current job and try to pick up a skill in the meantime. Committing 100% to something that you don't even know if you like or are good at is a pretty scary concept.
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Dec 12, 2014 02:13
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SiGmA_X posted:Knyteguy - How much are you guys contributing this year to the HSA? And when did your insurance plan start? This only applies in your first year of high deductible coverage, IF you use the "last-month" rule to contribute more than you should be able to in the first year based on the normal method of prorating the annual contribution by the number of months you were covered by a qualified high deductible plan. In other words, if you have been in a HDHP for more than a year this will never apply to you. If you switch from a HDHP to a low deductible, non qualified plan, then you simply can't contribute more than the prorated allowed amount at the time you switch (e.g. you switch plans March 31st, 2015 then you can contribute 3/12 of the annual 2015 contribution limit to your HSA).
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Dec 12, 2014 03:44
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Bugamol posted:Assuming we're talking about programming still. Not speaking for my wife here, but do you think it's possible she would dislike programming more than working her lovely job? I mean her shift tonight is until midnight, and for the next 3 days it's close to that as well. Getting burnt out is possible at every job really; might as well make good money and see your family more while you're at it. I think she likes programming so far, but I mean this as a separate argument. I think the majority of the population would agree that being financially independent and doing what you want trumps working every day, pretty much regardless of the job, so I've never understood the argument that working in a different field might suck so might as well not do it. I don't want to get into the whole FI argument again because truthfully we're so loving far away from anything resembling that situation that it's pointless, but I will say that making more money does make a job more tolerable, providing you're able to do the work. I've found you're also treated better as an employee. Cicero we like the idea of the unpaid intern thing. Also since we do have a business that involves .NET I was thinking that if my boss wouldn't be interested in taking her on as an unpaid intern (I'm not sure if he'd like us working together, since I'm really the only employee), we could also have her as an intern at our personal business, since I already have a code base setup that she could try to learn from, and hopefully get some commits in relatively quickly since it's not some huge enterprise software. Also guys I'm having trouble staying motivated. Any cool anecdotal stories or blurbs from anyone who used to be bad with money, and now you're good with money and it changed your life or something? I can't remember what the point of all of it is right now. Edit: I don't mean her job right now is lovely, because for some people it's probably really great. It's just lovely for us. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 19:56 on Dec 12, 2014 |
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Dec 12, 2014 19:54
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I used to be lovely with money and it sucked. I mean, sure, I got to buy all the latest gadgets on credit, but I was always juggling bills, the slightest hiccup put me in crisis mode, and I didn't have the financial freedom to do what I wanted. Now I'm less lovely with money and it's awesome. I realized I don't need the latest gadgets (still rocking the iPhone 3G), I have zero debt, I never even think about bills, and I've been able to weather a great many big financial surprises while barely batting an eye. I have $10k put away for supplementing a year of maternity leave, another $10k in reserve for emergencies, and my RRSP is maxed out. Getting one month ahead (YNAB Step 4) was the biggest change. Once I got there, the rest was easy. Having lived my entire life hand-to-mouth, I had no idea how less stressful it could be. YOU ARE ABOUT TO BE A FATHER. THERE'S YOUR MOTIVATION.
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Dec 12, 2014 20:28
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Knyteguy posted:I can't remember what the point of all of it is right now. You should go back to counseling. You're kind of broken if you forgot the point...
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Dec 12, 2014 20:35
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Old Fart posted:I used to be lovely with money and it sucked. I mean, sure, I got to buy all the latest gadgets on credit, but I was always juggling bills, the slightest hiccup put me in crisis mode, and I didn't have the financial freedom to do what I wanted. We're already at YNAB step 4, though. Everyone can stop reminding me I'm supposed to be a dad now also. I'm pretty well informed of that and it becomes grating. My parents were terrible with money and I grew up happy as can be even eating eggs, beans, and hotdogs for much of my early childhood. What I'm truly asking is how will being good with money change the circumstances of being a father, and life, etc vs being bad with money? Like the maternity example leave that's a good one. Being good with money in my past would mean that my wife could take a year maternity leave, and I would be in a position to negotiate a paternity leave (and be free to walk if terms couldn't be met). Would love to hear more.
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Dec 12, 2014 20:38
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Veskit posted:You should go back to counseling. You're kind of broken if you forgot the point... Oh please don't be hyperbolic Veskit. Already being in a position of being good with money gives insight. For example I was once extremely fit, now I'm not. I know the benefits of being fit and stuff because I've felt it before, and I understand first hand the benefits of the sacrifice. Financially, right now, I'm a fat guy who has always been fat. I don't know first hand the benefits of being fit. I've lost 10 lbs or so sure, but I also gained a few lbs back over Thanksgiving and my mindset is a little negative at the moment.
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Dec 12, 2014 20:41
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