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my cat is a total weirdo. he's always licking himself. how do I make him stop? he's doing it in front of guests and I can't even have company over anymore it's depraved. I thought having a cat was supposed to be relaxing, not a filthy, lewd, exhibition act all the time.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:49 |
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# ? May 21, 2024 17:29 |
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Good news: Your cat is delicious. Bad news: He thinks so too.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:52 |
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Avon Rep At a Party I'm Hosting: And as you can see, this new color line of nail polish can really bring out the color in your-- *cat hops on display table. begins licking hind leg* Avon Rep At a Party I'm Hosting: This is all wrong. I have to go.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:52 |
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Lick the cat, preferably in front of everyone, to help him.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:52 |
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Superconsndar posted:Lick the cat, preferably in front of everyone, to help him. that doesn't seem helpful at all with as much as he sheds it's all gonna get in my mouth blech
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:54 |
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First, catch the cat. Then, clamp the cat to a table. Once the cat is restrained, go get your circular saw. When you've completed these steps, get back to me.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:57 |
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Superconsndar posted:Lick the cat, preferably in front of everyone, to help him. wouldn't this just be reinforcing the behavior? you should have set licking times scheduled when company isn't around OP and stick to the schedule!
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:58 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:First, catch the cat. lol if you think he owns a tool
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 02:59 |
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FluffieDuckie posted:lol if you think he owns a tool Good point. Op, sharpen your dick in the can opener until it's sharp enough to cut cat flesh.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:00 |
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all my life i've owned and maintained a high quality zen garden in my bathroom which greatly helps pass the time for when, you know, i'm sitting there. it's like he's deliberately trolling me the way he treats my possessions. I'm not even going to tell you the kind of things he does in there, but well, let me just say this cat is one headache after another.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:00 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:Good point. Op, sharpen your dick in the can opener until it's sharp enough to cut cat flesh. what the...
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:01 |
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i am not a vet but i'm not sure about that dicksharpening advice, second opinion?
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:02 |
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that's kind of messed up
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:03 |
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First you are going to need some qtips.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:03 |
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Superconsndar posted:First you are going to need some qtips. ok i have some now what
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:04 |
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teach the cat that licking is a "private activity" that you can do in the bedroom, or the bathroom, but not in the living room and certainly not in the kitchen. like Awesome! said, you don't want to reinforce his behavior by shaming him. let him know it's ok, but only in the right setting.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:06 |
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one time there was a cat in heat hanging around outside my house, and my cat inexplicably walked out of the room on his two hind legs talking like a human
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:07 |
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wth posted:ok i have some now what careful PI is going to tell you to gently caress YOUR CAT WITH THE QTIPS AND YOUR CAT WILL loving MOAN AND WRITHE AND loving LOVE IT BECAUSE SHE'S A TRASHY loving WHORE, A TART, A PROSTITUTE FOR YOUR loving QTIP PRICK. I think my idea is better. At least you're using your own dick.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:08 |
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Siluvayne posted:teach the cat that licking is a "private activity" that you can do in the bedroom, or the bathroom, but not in the living room and certainly not in the kitchen. like Awesome! said, you don't want to reinforce his behavior by shaming him. let him know it's ok, but only in the right setting. this is really good advice I will try this and report back
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:08 |
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My cat used to do this until I taught it the virtuous lessons of Oliver Cromwell and Puritanism.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:08 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:careful PI is going to tell you to gently caress YOUR CAT WITH THE QTIPS AND YOUR CAT WILL loving MOAN AND WRITHE AND loving LOVE IT BECAUSE SHE'S A TRASHY loving WHORE, A TART, A PROSTITUTE FOR YOUR loving QTIP PRICK. is this the kind of stuff that goes on here? idk if I'm cut out for the rude boys of PI
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:09 |
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wth posted:is this the kind of stuff that goes on here? idk if I'm cut out for the rude boys of PI hey I didn't tell you to gently caress your cat I was gonna have you cut all your cat's limbs off and then it's loving head and stick a rod up it's goddamned rear end in a top hat and then you have a cat flag that won't bother anybody or insult anybody and hey then you don't even have to feed it but you don't wanna listen to me you wanna listen to somebody like supercondescending so I'm telling you that they're going to say to gently caress your cat with a qtip even though it's a boy because she's probably a homogay or something because APPARENTLY PIFB IS LESBIAN ISLAND *flips hair* *stomps out of thread*
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:11 |
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Your cat may be broken. Maybe it's time to get a new one.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:11 |
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fluffy bunnies are you okay should i call the e-vet
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:12 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:hey I didn't tell you to gently caress your cat I was gonna have you cut all your cat's limbs off and then it's loving head and stick a rod up it's goddamned rear end in a top hat and then you have a cat flag that won't bother anybody or insult anybody and hey then you don't even have to feed it but you don't wanna listen to me you wanna listen to somebody like supercondescending so I'm telling you that they're going to say to gently caress your cat with a qtip even though it's a boy because she's probably a homogay or something because APPARENTLY PIFB IS LESBIAN ISLAND
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:12 |
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so anyways, my cat did a funny thing
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:15 |
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*baseball slides back in*LITERALLY A BIRD posted:fluffy bunnies are you okay should i call the e-vet I'm fine but it's so sweet of you to think about me wth posted:so anyways, my cat did a funny thing DESTROY YOUR CAT'S TONGUE WITH A BELT SANDER AND ALL WILL BE WELL
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:16 |
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holy crap
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:16 |
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Has someone suggested he euth yet because, honestly, that's the only answer you will ever need in situations like this. Euth.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:17 |
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Demora posted:Has someone suggested he euth yet because, honestly, that's the only answer you will ever need in situations like this. euth+taxidermy
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:18 |
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Is there a pet exorcist community? Like the ghost whisperer, but for bunnies, but not like the dog whisperer.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:18 |
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:18 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:*baseball slides back in* Get help.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:18 |
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fluffy bunnies has finally gone off the deep end
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:19 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:DESTROY YOUR CAT'S TONGUE WITH A BELT SANDER AND ALL WILL BE WELL I thought this was the chill (pet) forum
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:19 |
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I....you could...qtip
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:20 |
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what kind of belt sander should i use I'll throw it on my christmas list
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:21 |
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adventure in the sandbox posted:fluffy bunnies has finally gone off the deep end and lo off in the distance a breath whispers "ladislava gertzdenkielwctz" Darkness falls.
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:21 |
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is there a hardware suggestion thread anywhere I've heard a lot of solutions so far that require things I don't have if i'm going to become a PI reg I'm gonna need the tools the pros use
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:22 |
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# ? May 21, 2024 17:29 |
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:and lo off in the distance a breath whispers "ladislava gertzdenkielwctz" Its... beautiful
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# ? Dec 16, 2014 03:22 |