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she has 2 legs
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 03:56 |
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# ? Jun 5, 2024 03:17 |
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Wolfsheim posted:From a few pages back, but this is easily the most EU sentence I've ever read. It features a character not in the movies using the secret ultra-powerful Force abilities of a clone of a character not in the movies and using anti-Force powers from a creature not mentioned in the movies that is different from a similar creature Han Solo hosed, and it all takes place inside of a scene in Return of the Jedi. This is peak EU. Are people joking or did Han Solo actually gently caress the space weasel? Has my brain repressed this memory to protect my entire childhood from being devoured by awareness that I once read a scene of space bestiality? gohuskies posted:"I bid you all Dark Greetings!" A body of military officers whose most notable member doesn't take the Force seriously and lets his direct subordinate tell Darth Vader to his face that the Force is bullshit give some stupid evil cult greeting. Yeah, that's in-character. E: I remember reading The Glove of Darth Vader when I was like eight and I thought it was utterly godawful even then. It's so bad even children are moffended. Woolie Wool fucked around with this message at 04:22 on Dec 18, 2014 |
# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:08 |
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it was corran horn that hosed the space weasel E: also i think he was allergic to it
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:16 |
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Did it give him space weasel herpes?
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:20 |
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I'd gently caress a space weasel and you're a liar if you say you wouldn't.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:22 |
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Woolie Wool posted:Did it give him space weasel herpes? Actually, yes. I'm pretty sure the book did mention him getting a rash or something of the sort. Other than that, Rogue Squadron was a pretty decent book with some relatively smart space combat scenes.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:23 |
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Arcsquad12 posted:Actually, yes. I'm pretty sure the book did mention him getting a rash or something of the sort. the rash was from his chain/medallion not the weasel
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:26 |
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ThePutty posted:does anybody else think mon calamari is a really dumb name for a race of squid humanoids? what about bib fortuna too, that's also dumb Mon calamari got mon restaurant four stars in a Paris newspaper.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:27 |
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pentyne posted:What, the magical finger-chopstick aliens or the "Mormons take over the world"? I meant go off the rails in the sense that the first book is certainly Doom and the second book is definitely Doom II. Once the explanation for why everything happened well..it just kinda spirals down from there.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:28 |
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ElGroucho posted:Just wanted to skip forward in time and tell everyone that the Doom novels were unironically better than the totality of EU writing Infernal Sky is mind-bendingly terrible enough to stand with the best worst of the EU, especially with the soldiers ending up on an alien ship naked and conversing with two aliens named Sears and Roebuck oh and the demons are some other kind of aliens and here's some weird jargon and bullshit eschatology that has nothing to do with why anyone played Doom. While we're on the subject of awful things that nerds like, I reminisced yesterday about Babylon 5 and in hindsight it was much, much worse than I thought it was when I first watched it. People don't talk in that show, they give speeches and declaim to each other, and the more endlessly quoted the declamation by Babylon 5 nerds, the worse it is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFvkgfBXHPA This is the most quoted scene in the entire series and also one of the worst. It is a complete and utter failure in writing, delivery, and direction. Woolie Wool fucked around with this message at 04:37 on Dec 18, 2014 |
# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:30 |
Fetus Tree posted:the rash was from his chain/medallion not the weasel i thought it was some combination of that + his sweat and her fur or something of course, when stackpole wrote the rogue squadron books, i don't think the selonians and bothans were so animal-like as they've ended up being.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:30 |
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Tricky D posted:Space squid women often use their breasts to suckle their young. "Aayla Secura using her breasts to impress a Gossam guard."
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:34 |
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:"Aayla Secura using her breasts to impress a Gossam guard." best jedi
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:39 |
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she impressed us all <3
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:40 |
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Milky Moor posted:i thought it was some combination of that + his sweat and her fur or something Oh God. I hate you all and myself. Corran Horn wore a Jedi Credit (stupid gold medallion with his ancestors face on it made when he made Jedi Master) on a gold chain because his sweat was "acidic enough to tarnish something like silver". Apparently there's a normal range of sweat acidity and his is on the extreme end while still being within human norms or whatever and his acid sweat was sufficiently acidic to get through the waxy coating on a space weasel named Chertyl Rootwooler's fur and irritate her skin. Also he was mildly alergic to her fur and described sex as arousing mutual sunburn which is why they only had sex once. All of this was to reassure a 16 year old kid from Tattooine that it was ok that he wanted to gently caress one of these Or maybe these? Whichever depiction of Bothans makes you laugh harder, basically. TheSpiritFox fucked around with this message at 04:53 on Dec 18, 2014 |
# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:49 |
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they both have me pretty hard tbh
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:56 |
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now I'm pretty sure that all those bothans that died to steal the death star plans were just asking for it.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:58 |
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TheSpiritFox posted:Oh God. I hate you all and myself. Oh god I can corroborate this
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 04:58 |
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They are depicted as being half-naked because of course they are. Also that dude has no room for any of his abdominal organs with that ridiculous build.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:00 |
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Nostalgia4Infinity posted:Oh god I can corroborate this For more fun go read I, Jedi where Corran Horn's temporary mortal enemy is a pirate dude named remart who rapes one of these. That's right. Star Wars has a human raping a werewolf. P.S. TheSpiritFox fucked around with this message at 05:13 on Dec 18, 2014 |
# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:00 |
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I'm just so tired of these star wars.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:02 |
Many goons died (on the inside) to bring us this information.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:06 |
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Thats no goon..
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:11 |
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I have constructed a complex graph indicating the parameters concerning wherein it becomes acceptable to totally clench a boner over a nonhuman, partially human or, to use the Gygaxian vernacular " demihuman," female employing a weighted average of facial features to body structure. Beginning as follows, hhuuuuaarrrrnnngh
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:13 |
TheSpiritFox posted:Oh God. I hate you all and myself. wouldn't, would would corran horn is the best loving character in the whole EU and he should be in the new movies
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:17 |
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Arcsquad12 posted:Actually, yes. I'm pretty sure the book did mention him getting a rash or something of the sort. I remember someone asking Micheal Stackpol about it and he said when he wrote that bit he thought they were more human-like (kind of like Bothans) and didn't realize they were giant weasels until after the book was published. For whatever it's worth. And yeah Corren was mildly allergic to her and got a full body rash. E; fb Personally I think Voort is my favorite EU character Imagine this guy in a starfighter. Or on stage dancing for the ladies platedlizard fucked around with this message at 05:31 on Dec 18, 2014 |
# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:23 |
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TheSpiritFox posted:Oh God. I hate you all and myself. star wars galaxies had weird bothans
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:42 |
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It must have been so loving satisfying to be on the Uber Nerd Council that got to burn down the whole of the EU. I hope Han Solo and Leia are divorced in the new movies and never had any kids.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 05:57 |
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i hope they were never married and luke is gay
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:09 |
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Fetus Tree posted:i hope they were never married and luke is gay p much guaranteed
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:13 |
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I heard that Mark Hamill lost a lot of weight and got pretty fit for the new movies
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:14 |
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He grew a beard and looks like a less gibbon- bodied Slavoj Zizek
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:15 |
PostNouveau posted:It must have been so loving satisfying to be on the Uber Nerd Council that got to burn down the whole of the EU. not going to lie, i hope the new movies make it virtually impossible to be like 'well, the movies don't openly contradict some of the old stuff' when it comes to the old EU. stuff like han and leia got divorced or never got married or whatever
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:17 |
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Harime Nui posted:He grew a beard and looks like a less gibbon- bodied Slavoj Zizek
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:26 |
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I hope a moon still crashes into chewie somehow tho.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:26 |
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Holy poo poo were those books bad, even when I was ten I considered them to be poo poo. I know the empire is the space nazis but the series turns them into literal servants of evil, for evil with the bonus of Palpatines poor grandson fighting for the rebels.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 06:29 |
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Arcsquad12 posted:The woman in the background has only one leg. This being star wars I wouldn't be surprised if she's just a one legged species. Yes, that one legged species is called The Eileen. The entire species are waitresses at The Intergalactic House of Pancakes.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 07:00 |
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TheSpiritFox posted:
BOTHAN MILF BONED IN BUSINESS BOARDROOM.
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 07:05 |
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Milky Moor posted:not going to lie, i hope the new movies make it virtually impossible to be like 'well, the movies don't openly contradict some of the old stuff' when it comes to the old EU. stuff like han and leia got divorced or never got married or whatever hopefully JJ abrams does a good enough job that they even win the EU nerds over god i really hope abrams doesn't gently caress this up
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 07:26 |
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# ? Jun 5, 2024 03:17 |
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Goddamn the Star Wars EU has a ridiculous amount of rape in it
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# ? Dec 18, 2014 16:20 |