Auspol December: All I want for Christmas is a new government.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > Auspol December: All I want for Christmas is a new government.

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Sisgmund: Jan 31, 2006

Current rumours are Morrison to social services, Andrews to defense.

Itshappening.gif?

# ? Dec 21, 2014 04:41

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 20:01

CROWS EVERYWHERE: Dec 17, 2012; CAW CAW CAW; Dinosaur Gum

Anidav posted:

Can someone make a Hearts of Iron mod with Scott Morrison leading the Forth Reich?

Wait long enough and you won't need a mod for it... :unsmigghh:

Sisgmund posted:

Current rumours are Morrison to social services, Andrews to defense.

Itshappening.gif?

Oh god kill me now

# ? Dec 21, 2014 04:42

Anidav: Feb 25, 2010; ahhh fuck its the rats again

Scott Morrison to send all poors to PNG

# ? Dec 21, 2014 04:47

Cartoon: Jun 20, 2008; poop

Jobseekers must now be referred to as unlawful welfare recipients.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 04:56

Anidav: Feb 25, 2010; ahhh fuck its the rats again

God know how they'll win the next election now. What with giving up all their humanity to the dark one and saying gently caress it, lets put a soulless rear end in a top hat in charge of welfare.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 04:58

Fruity Gordo: Aug 5, 2013; Neurotic, Impotent Rage!

Sisgmund posted:

Current rumours are Morrison to social services, Andrews to defense.

Itshappening.gif?

Idk this sounds too bizarre. Andrews wouldn't roll over and give up Human Services, and I don't see why Morrison would want to relinquish all the power he just got himself in his portfolio.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 04:59

Asphyxious: Jun 25, 2012; I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life.

Cartoon posted:

Jobseekers will be shot

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:01

Coq au Nandos: Nov 7, 2006; I think I would say to my daughters if they were to ask me this question... A shitpost is the greatest gift that you can give someone, the ultimate gift of giving and don't give it to someone lightly, that's what I would say.

Fruity Gordo posted:

Idk this sounds too bizarre. Andrews wouldn't roll over and give up Social Services, and I don't see why Morrison would want to relinquish all the power he just got himself in his portfolio.

ftfy

I think it's legit. Andrews is dead wood and Morrison has seen Immigration as a means to an end. If Tone was smart he'd have relegated Morrison to Defence. His ambition is dangerous.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:05

bell jar: Feb 25, 2009

who will be the minister for gillard smearing?

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:13

Box Hill Strangler: Jun 27, 2007; Frozen peas are on special at Woolies! Bargain!

Scott Morrison is now Minister for Social Services LMAO.

Now all of Australia gets to be brutalised, not just browns on boats.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:13

Birb Katter: Sep 18, 2010; BOATS STOPPED
CARBON TAX AXED
TURNBULL AS PM
LIBERALS WILL BE RE-ELECTED IN A LANDSLIDE

Science back into the Ministry.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:16

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

SKY COQ posted:

ftfy

I think it's legit. Andrews is dead wood and Morrison has seen Immigration as a means to an end. If Tone was smart he'd have relegated Morrison to Defence. His ambition is dangerous.

You don't quite get the idea of Ministries. They're to save the PM's arse by putting ambitious people in difficult portfolios. That's why Joe was Treasurer, thats why Morrison was initially in Immigration (which kept him away from everything else, and didn't work). Dutton has no personality and isn't ambitious, the same for Andrews.

If this is correct, it guarantees that the base will be happy, Morrison will be too busy and unpopular and Abbott gets to look reasonable. It won't work of course. Morrison has burnt the cross-benchers already, the Senate will be hostile and the electorate won't budge in the polls.

Interesting that they've put Birmingham as Assistant Minister for Education. Possibly going to actually do the job and let Pyne prance around?

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:17

Fruity Gordo: Aug 5, 2013; Neurotic, Impotent Rage!

Does anyone have any links for this stuff? Lol if they change the name of the department.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:21

GoldStandardConure: Jun 11, 2010; I have to kill fast
and mayflies too slow; Pillbug

IslamoNazi posted:

Science back into the Ministry.

Starting by reopening the Department of Phrenology, to explain why dole bludgers arent as successful as bankers.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:22

Gough Suppressant: Nov 14, 2008

Nuclear Spy posted:

Yeah, considering how Labor ran with the submarines issue at the Fisher by-election and with another by-election next month, I can't see him staying on much longer.

My guess is that with the attempted narrative of resetting everything, it is likely that the reshuffling will be a way to resuscitate any remaining political capital for the senior ministers. My wild prediction is that this will be the second phase of this term, with the final reshuffle next year having fresh ministers with a completely different message. So we could see Turnbull moving to Treasurer today with Cormann replacing him eventually after one budget destroys his capital and Pyne in the 'third phase' moving towards the Federal Election moving to communications, his petition being a foreshadow to extra funding. We'll see a few females in assistant positions to be elevated later to soften Abbott's (or other leader) women's vote.

honestly I think you give them way too much credit for planning things out

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:22

Fruity Gordo: Aug 5, 2013; Neurotic, Impotent Rage!

Andrews is an ideologue. He doesn't have an eye on the Prime Ministership at all, but he definitely wants to gently caress up as many degenerate leaners' lives as possible and DHS is a really good place to do it from.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:23

CROWS EVERYWHERE: Dec 17, 2012; CAW CAW CAW; Dinosaur Gum

Box Hill Strangler posted:

Scott Morrison is now Minister for Social Services LMAO.

Now all of Australia gets to be brutalised, not just browns on boats.

Oh wow. I think I'm going to go have a little bit of a spew. And then a nervous breakdown.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:24

Brayds2006: Aug 21, 2011

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

Oh wow. I think I'm going to go have a little bit of a spew. And then a nervous breakdown.

Way ahead of you.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:26

Birb Katter: Sep 18, 2010; BOATS STOPPED
CARBON TAX AXED
TURNBULL AS PM
LIBERALS WILL BE RE-ELECTED IN A LANDSLIDE

Fruity Gordo posted:

Does anyone have any links for this stuff? Lol if they change the name of the department.

It's live on ABC24

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:27

Fruity Gordo: Aug 5, 2013; Neurotic, Impotent Rage!

IslamoNazi posted:

It's live on ABC24

Lmao thnx

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:30

Gough Suppressant: Nov 14, 2008

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:33

PaletteSwappedNinja: Jun 3, 2008; One Nation, Under God.

Clicked on the stream, Tony's blaming Labor for something, turned off. Someone list this poo poo.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:33

Dubs: Mar 6, 2007; Stroll Own Zone.
Disregard Stroll outside zone.

Scott Morrison: "A very decent human being" - Tony Abbott, 2014

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:37

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

Just realized Pyne gets to bugger up VET and TAFE now. Hope Birmingham is there to stop him.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:39

PaletteSwappedNinja: Jun 3, 2008; One Nation, Under God.

They did it, they found the one dude worse than Kevin Andrews to run social services.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:40

Lizard Combatant: Sep 29, 2010; I have some notes.

Oh my god. It's all turd! They couldn't even dump blowy Joe.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:40

Coq au Nandos: Nov 7, 2006; I think I would say to my daughters if they were to ask me this question... A shitpost is the greatest gift that you can give someone, the ultimate gift of giving and don't give it to someone lightly, that's what I would say.

ewe2 posted:

You don't quite get the idea of Ministries. They're to save the PM's arse by putting ambitious people in difficult portfolios. That's why Joe was Treasurer, thats why Morrison was initially in Immigration (which kept him away from everything else, and didn't work). Dutton has no personality and isn't ambitious, the same for Andrews.

If this is correct, it guarantees that the base will be happy, Morrison will be too busy and unpopular and Abbott gets to look reasonable. It won't work of course. Morrison has burnt the cross-benchers already, the Senate will be hostile and the electorate won't budge in the polls.

Defence is a black hole though, it's where you send someone to never come back.

Morrison to Social Services is a demotion, and sticking Dutton of all people in his old job is adding insult to injury.

Morrison has been able to pass legislation in the Senate, which is something Andrews was not able to do. Of course, he did this by holding asylum seeker children for ransom.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:52

Anidav: Feb 25, 2010; ahhh fuck its the rats again

IF YOU THOUGHT YEAR ONE OF THE ABBOTT GOVERNMENT WAS BAD THEN DO WE HAVE NEWS FOR YOU.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 05:58

Fruity Gordo: Aug 5, 2013; Neurotic, Impotent Rage!

Lol I'm so confused. Why do they think it's a good idea to put Morrison in charge of what's left of the welfare state? Like. If you want to destroy the welfare state you slap a teddy bears face on the messenger, not Darth Vader's helmet. Not a guy who gets called a sociopath in the Senate and everyone goes 'yeah fair call'. What is going on.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:03

hambeet: Sep 13, 2002

I could see it as good news because one of only two complement ministers just got demoted and everything will implode spectacularly some time next year.

:jerky:

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:06

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Fruity Gordo posted:

Lol I'm so confused. Why do they think it's a good idea to put Morrison in charge of what's left of the welfare state? Like. If you want to destroy the welfare state you slap a teddy bears face on the messenger, not Darth Vader's helmet. Not a guy who gets called a sociopath in the Senate and everyone goes 'yeah fair call'. What is going on.

Well, consider the job he's done from the LNPs perspective - he's turned immigration into a black hole where no information comes in or out. He's utterly demonised the poor and desperate. He's has done all this and is now considered so popular that he was seriously considered for a super-portfolio.

If you want to destroy welfare and make the people cheer, who better to send?

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:09

Anidav: Feb 25, 2010; ahhh fuck its the rats again

I for one, will not be cheering.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:11

Nuclear Spy: Jun 10, 2008; feeling under?

Gorilla Salad posted:

Well, consider the job he's done from the LNPs perspective - he's turned immigration into a black hole where no information comes in or out. He's utterly demonised the poor and desperate. He's has done all this and is now considered so popular that he was seriously considered for a super-portfolio.

If you want to destroy welfare and make the people cheer, who better to send?

Or the fact that this strategy won't actually work on shore and this is just another example of throwing a 'well-performing' minister under the bus to protect Abbott's job.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:12

Murodese: Mar 6, 2007; Think you've got what it takes?
We're looking for fine Men & Women to help Protect the Australian Way of Life.

Become part of the Legend. Defence Jobs.

ewe2 posted:

Just realized Pyne gets to bugger up VET and TAFE now. Hope Birmingham is there to stop him.

Birmingham is a fuckwit, he's not going to do poo poo.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:21

tithin: Nov 14, 2003; [Grandmaster Tactician]

quote:

Scott Morrison will become social services minister and take charge of a �families package� and ongoing welfare crackdown while defence minister David Johnston has been dumped from cabinet by Tony Abbott in a bigger than expected ministerial shake-up.

The prime minister has also elevated Sussan Ley to the health and sport portfolio and into cabinet where she will become the second woman on his frontbench alongside Julie Bishop.

The current social services minister, Kevin Andrews, will move to defence and the current health minister, Peter Dutton � who the prime minister described as a �tough, no nonsense individual� � will take over immigration and border security.

Abbott made it clear Morrison�s new role was central to the government�s hopes for a political revival in the new year by putting �jobs and families at the heart of our political agenda�, as well as to its plans for �budget repair�.

�The minister [is] responsible for crafting the holistic families package which will be such an important part of our political and economic agenda,� Abbott said as he announced the first major changes to the ministerial arrangements since opposition.

He said Morrison would be responsible for ensuring �mutual obligation� was at the heart of social services policy and said targeting welfare to the vulnerable was �an ongoing program � Fit working-age people should be working, preferably for a wage, but if not then for the dole.

�I can think of no finer advocate than Scott Morrison, he is the master of difficult policy as he has abundantly demonstrated in all but stopping the boats over the last 15 months,� Abbott said. �He is also a very decent human being.�

�The minister for social services is essentially a ministry for economic participation and it is essential to have a minister of Scott�s drive and competence in this role.�

He denied Morrison�s appointment to a role central to next year�s budget planning was an indication of any lack of faith in his existing economic team.

�[Treasurer] Joe [Hockey] and I are the closest possible economic partnership � I suppose what you could say is that � we now want to focus even more on the one commitment we made that is yet to be substantially completed � to get the budget back under control.�

The reshuffle is the final part of Abbott�s attempt to �reboot� public perceptions of his government after he admitted the coalition�s performance had been a bit �ragged�, made minor changes to defence force allowances and foreshadowed another revamp of his signature paid parental leave scheme as part of a new parenting and child care package.

Abbott said Andrews was a very experienced minister and a �safe pair of hands� for the defence portfolio.

Andrews will inherit difficult defence procurement decisions, including the process to choose a replacement for the Collins class submarines. Dutton will inherit the problem of more than 2,000 asylum seekers still in offshore detention and more than 30,000 asylum seekers in Australia facing the uncertainty of temporary protection visas.

Abbott has reversed his decision not to include science in a ministerial title, renaming the portfolio held by industry minister Ian Macfarlane as �industry and science�.

Abbott said he was pleased to have been able to appoint another woman to cabinet, as well as two new female parliamentary secretaries: Kelly O�Dwyer, who becomes parliamentary secretary to the treasurer, and Karen Andrews, who becomes parliamentary secretary to the minister for industry and science.

Another parliamentary secretary � Queensland senator Brett Mason � has been returned to the backbench.

Sussan Ley, who represents the far western New South Wales seat of Farrer, has been assistant education minister with responsibility for childcare. She has performed well in parliament and has been seen an effective at explaining the government�s policies and shows like the ABC�s Q and A.

Josh Frydenberg, currently the prime minister�s parliamentary secretary, takes the assistant treasurer�s role � a sought-after training ground ministry for ambitious up and comers. The Victorian MP and former adviser to both John Howard and Alexander Downer replaces John Howard�s former chief of staff Arthur Sinodinos, who stood aside in March after being called as a witness to the Independent Commission against Corruption.

Sinodinos resigned from the ministry on Friday because the Icac report, which the government was waiting on to decide his future, has been delayed until March at the earliest, meaning the government would have been without an assistant treasurer in the lead up to another budget.

When he announced his first ministry last September, Abbott said he was �obviously disappointed� there weren�t more women in it. He said Sophie Mirabella would have made cabinet had she not lost her Victorian seat of Indi.

But he said there were �some very good and talented women knocking on the door of the cabinet and there are lots of good and talented women knocking on the door of the ministry. So I think you can expect to see, as time goes by, more women in both the cabinet and the ministry.�

David Johnston�s ill-disciplined comments that the Adelaide-based Australian Submarine Corporation �could not build a canoe� contributed to the Coalition�s defeat in the byelection for the South Australian seat of Fisher, which gave Labor the numbers to rule the state in its own right.

Johnston has also been the subject of serious internal leaks in recent weeks, including that he and a senior staffer had spent $6,300 on food and drink with foreign officials and industry representatives, even as defence personnel learned they would be suffering a sub-inflation pay rise of 1.5% for the next three years.

Abbott expressed �gratitude� to David Johnston, who he said had done �a fine job�.

Abbott said he would be happy to take this new ministry to the next election.

Acting opposition leader Senator Penny Wong said the prime minister had �announced a change to his frontbench team but not a change to his policies�.

�No reshuffle can fix this government�s unfair budget,� she said.

In other changes to the ministerial arrangements:

former Western Australia treasurer Christian Porter, who entered federal parliament last year, becomes parliamentary secretary to the prime minister
a decision to make the industry minister responsible for training has been reversed, with education minister Christopher Pyne rebadged as minister for education and training
Senator Simon Birmingham � now parliamentary secretary for the environment � will become parliamentary secretary for training
Queensland MP Steve Ciobo � now parliamentary secretary to the treasurer � will become parliamentary secretary for foreign affairs and trade
Bob Baldwin moves from parliamentary secretary for industry to parliamentary secretary for the environment

quote:

�I can think of no finer advocate than Scott Morrison, he is the master of difficult policy as he has abundantly demonstrated in all but stopping the boats over the last 15 months,� Abbott said. �He is also a very decent human being.�

quote:

�He is also a very decent human being.�

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:21

Anidav: Feb 25, 2010; ahhh fuck its the rats again

Master of Difficult Policy: Translation - gently caress you Napoleon, I am Prime Minister. Get lost.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:24

Skellybones: May 31, 2011; Fun Shoe

Asphyxious posted:

Cartoon posted:
Jobseekers will be shot into the sun.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:28

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

SKY COQ posted:

Defence is a black hole though, it's where you send someone to never come back.

Morrison to Social Services is a demotion, and sticking Dutton of all people in his old job is adding insult to injury.

Morrison has been able to pass legislation in the Senate, which is something Andrews was not able to do. Of course, he did this by holding asylum seeker children for ransom.

Exactly why Morrison has been put in SS. If he pulls out a miracle Abbott will look great, if he can't then Abbott gets to look sad. Reshuffles are about the PM first and the issues second. I don't disagree that SS is a demotion, I'm explaining why.

From Morrison's POV Defence would have dovetailed very nicely with the powers of Immigration if he had got to keep both. Dutton is a message that the immigration issue is done and the Libs want a better salesperson for their health policies. Birmingham is there to shore up Education but not so much that Pyne doesn't take the heat/credit for it.

All of this fails to read the electorate's mood. For Morrison to grandstand in SS will be a disaster and he's guaranteed to do so because its the only style of politics he knows or understands. OTOH Ley is good at selling the media on her programs, but if it fails, serves her right for being a mouthy moderate woman.

If the issues were really front and centre this is not the reshuffle you'd do. It's to save Abbott's arse a bit longer and frankly I hope it fails.

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:28

CROWS EVERYWHERE: Dec 17, 2012; CAW CAW CAW; Dinosaur Gum

ewe2 posted:

Exactly why Morrison has been put in SS.

Must... resist... making an Asphyxious joke...

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:33

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 20:01

bowmore: Oct 6, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Sociopath is the same as social amiright guys??

# ? Dec 21, 2014 06:39

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > Auspol December: All I want for Christmas is a new government.

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