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Jimmy4400nav
Apr 1, 2011

Ambassador to Moonlandia

mornhaven posted:

I had one born in my dungeon and live there for 30 years because I forgot about them.

The roleplayer in me would then release the child and have him turn out to the be heir to the conquered kingdom next door. 5 years later after he raises an army in rebellion, declares war on me, wins and casts his former jailer into the dungeon. Looking up for hope through a small beam of sunlight shining in through a hole, the character sees a face, its the man he released five years ago.

The cold blue eyes piece the darkness as his quiet voice echos over the cobble stones of the dungeons, my manacles clink together silently as I look up at my jailor.

"And so here you are, consigned to the darkness you had me born into. For thirty years I wallowed in the blindness as you sat on your throne, growing fat off the spoils of my homeland. Laughing at my misery. Enjoy your new home, I had your line ended as we took your keep. Let the dark now envelop you!" There is a small clank as a piece of metal slams shut over the opening, engulfing the room in pitch black.

End scene.

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binge crotching
Apr 2, 2010

Neif posted:

Not once have I had the "Viking" trait on any of my subjects or rulers? What triggers a character to have that trait?

Raiding, I think if I remember right it's called from on_action when a siege is completed. So just siege down everything when you raid, and you'll get it eventually.

El Pollo Blanco
Jun 12, 2013

by sebmojo

Neif posted:

So I went with a Charlemagne start as a minor Jarl, 200 years later I've reformed the Germanic Religion, converted to feudalism and formed the Empire of Scandinavia.

Throughout that I pillaged and raided my way across England, North and Western France and the top of Iberia when the pickings were slim elsewhere.

Not once have I had the "Viking" trait on any of my subjects or rulers? What triggers a character to have that trait?

You have to siege down holdings in a province with a raiding army led by the character you want to get the Viking trait on, if I recall correctly.

Synnr
Dec 30, 2009

Volkerball posted:

Genius really isn't worth it. You're better off creating a ruler who can educate all your sons into great characters, rather than one who has a 15 or whatever percent chance of passing on genius. There's a few traits that lower your age by a few years, but only lower a skill by one point. Deceitful and cynical are two of these iirc. So it drops your diplomacy or w/e by one point, but lowers your age 4 or 5 years, meaning you can add 4-5 more skill points to make up for it. I usually take both of those. Also look through the purple traits like ugly. I always take ugly, but I think there's one or two more I really like that will lower your age like 15 years with little punishment. Once you've done that, you can give yourself a 4 star education trait, and dump like 20 points into your skill points and still be 18 years old. Also aggressive leader is a must.


Oh I know genius isnt the end-all thing, I just get bored with the game as-is when I start getting on a roll and I (and I know it is dumb) I end up playing like it is some bizarro pokemon breeding game. Like, I got semi-lucky in my last zoroastrian game and between the byzantines covering me in the east and somehow triggering extreme revolts in the west (plus seljuk, who I captured and converted and made a duke after finishing off his army when he started stomping on the muslims), the muslim world was shattered and zoroastrianism was on the rise. The next step after that would probably be shots at the byzantines but I got sidetracked breeding that +10 to muslim opinion trait into my ruling family and slapping my many lustful children together in different counties until I brought all their lines back together with some ubermensch heirs. My trade republic kingdom started with genius sons but now it exists solely to bring me money and to take my lovely dynasty members and get them out of the breeding pool. Those dudes down there in their funny hats are more multi-cultural than any modern nation at this point.

Holy war CB seems insanely overpowered once you get rolling and my difficulty rating always plummets towards 0 when I look at in those saves. I think I had/have more trouble with my need to have a million kids when I have concubines and am stuck with gavelkind for awhile as britain based norse.

e; I'm still reading through parts of the thread I never got to and like halfway through at some point someone was making a mod using the lower 48 as the basis of the map. Now I can't find it, does anyone know what the name of that is? I want to see what the required DLC or whatever is there.

Synnr fucked around with this message at 11:47 on Dec 22, 2014

Guildencrantz
May 1, 2012

IM ONE OF THE GOOD ONES

Jimmy4400nav posted:

The roleplayer in me would then release the child and have him turn out to the be heir to the conquered kingdom next door. 5 years later after he raises an army in rebellion, declares war on me, wins and casts his former jailer into the dungeon. Looking up for hope through a small beam of sunlight shining in through a hole, the character sees a face, its the man he released five years ago.

The cold blue eyes piece the darkness as his quiet voice echos over the cobble stones of the dungeons, my manacles clink together silently as I look up at my jailor.

"And so here you are, consigned to the darkness you had me born into. For thirty years I wallowed in the blindness as you sat on your throne, growing fat off the spoils of my homeland. Laughing at my misery. Enjoy your new home, I had your line ended as we took your keep. Let the dark now envelop you!" There is a small clank as a piece of metal slams shut over the opening, engulfing the room in pitch black.

End scene.

I always thought the one thing CK2 needs to be perfect is an elaborate event chain for revenge.

Mailer
Nov 4, 2009

Have you accepted The Void as your lord and savior?
Shattered World continues to be the best mod ever if you want to play a strategy game that also happens to have cool events.

Odobenidae posted:

Retinues do have practical uses for everyone, it's just that they're not "Push this to win" buttons for the player anymore. The way they used to be was silly: having a huge volunteer professional standing army in 1000 AD.

2013: "Guys levies are so overpowered just use retinues and mercs like you're supposed to!"
2014: "Guys retinues are so overpowered you're supposed to use levies!"

Paradox is under the thumb of Big Merc.

buckets of buckets
Apr 8, 2012

CHECK OUT MY AWESOME POSTS
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https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3831643&pagenumber=5&perpage=40#post475694634
I always figured retinues were meant to be that a wealthy feudal ruler might 500 heavy infantry or 1000 knights that are the pride and joy of his army, trained soldiers loyal only to him .ie a retinue not a standing army. Making legions with them was fun and all but didn't fit in very well and made roman reconquest extremely easy and boring.

EightDeer
Dec 2, 2011

Is there any chance of Charlemagne / Way of Life and the accompanying graphical DLC getting discounted in the Steam Sale? If not, I'm just going to buy them at full price.

Soup du Journey
Mar 20, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

EightDeer posted:

Is there any chance of Charlemagne / Way of Life and the accompanying graphical DLC getting discounted in the Steam Sale? If not, I'm just going to buy them at full price.
Should be 20% off on greenmangaming with that voucher code they've got. I think they've got bundles for some of that stuff that'll shave another couple bucks off too.

Inside Outside
Jul 31, 2005

How do you even duel someone with the war focus? I haven't found a single suitable candidate and the tooltip for it is pretty vague. What constitutes a foe, exactly?

ThaumPenguin
Oct 9, 2013

Nobody Interesting posted:

Got a CTD, thought "it's fine - it's Jan 30th, I autosaved 29 days ago!". Even though it DID autosave, the only autosave I actually have is 30 years old :negative:

It might be lying in a different folder, have you checked if it's in your dynasty's save folder or in the general save folder?

Inside Outside posted:

How do you even duel someone with the war focus? I haven't found a single suitable candidate and the tooltip for it is pretty vague. What constitutes a foe, exactly?

They need to be a rival, I think.

Nobody Interesting
Mar 29, 2013

One way, dead end... Street signs are such fitting metaphors for the human condition.


ThaumPenguin posted:

It might be lying in a different folder, have you checked if it's in your dynasty's save folder or in the general save folder?

I was playing a mod, so I checked the mod's own folder, I checked the Steam cloud folder... I can't think it would be anywhere else.

ElGroucho
Nov 1, 2005

We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane
Fun Shoe
Retinues are payoff for getting your finances and infrastructure down tight in the beginning of your run as a backwater count.

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Inside Outside posted:

How do you even duel someone with the war focus? I haven't found a single suitable candidate and the tooltip for it is pretty vague. What constitutes a foe, exactly?

Marry a lustful woman, get cucked by half a dozen men, duel them.

Soup du Journey
Mar 20, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

ThaumPenguin posted:

They need to be a rival, I think.
Are any of the lifestyles particularly good at generating rivals? Short of the whole starring in cuckporn thing, obviously

ThaumPenguin
Oct 9, 2013

Doctor Schnabel posted:

Are any of the lifestyles particularly good at generating rivals? Short of the whole starring in cuckporn thing, obviously

Getting cucked worked for me. Try doing that. EDIT: Nevermind, I can't read.

I also got a new rival after a common friend introduced us to each other. He was the bastard child of my previous character's cheating ex-wife who got banished to France.

Dilber
Mar 27, 2007

TFLC
(Trophy Feline Lifting Crew)


I hadn't played in a long time (since wiz still ran ck2+), and I am kinda amazed at how stable everything feels compared to it, but how it's still fun. It's still before 900, and starting as a count in wales in the CM start I've managed to completely take over the British isles and Brittany.


Early on, I matri-married a claimaint of East Anglia to a daughter. I proceeded to put him on the throne there so that when he had kids, I could invite them in, and in the mean time have allies. Immediately after I do so, My heir's wife(the duchess of north umberland) declares war on him, and replaces him with a different claimant. I immediately declare war again and put my guy back on the throne. Fast forward 4 years, and I notice that he turned Sunni, divorced my daughter, and married 4 woman. I immediately holy warred for the duchy, took it, and gave it to my daughter.

Thanks random muslim conversion.

also, in regards to retinue chat, my retinue is 5k and it's not super expensive and its crazy useful. It's been useful ever since it was 1-2k.

Nobody Interesting
Mar 29, 2013

One way, dead end... Street signs are such fitting metaphors for the human condition.


My 3 year old daughter has just been titled "The Unchaste."

Gniwu
Dec 18, 2002

Nobody Interesting posted:

My 3 year old daughter has just been titled "The Unchaste."

Victim blaming!

Inside Outside
Jul 31, 2005

One other question: why am I not de jure drifting out of the Byzantine Empire as Georgia? I hold all of de jure Georgia, is it some dumb reason like I don't control all of Armenia?

Nobody Interesting
Mar 29, 2013

One way, dead end... Street signs are such fitting metaphors for the human condition.


I feel like I should earn a Henry VIII themed achievement. I've just killed 6 wives who kept producing daughters. I've just passed over to the 4 year old son I FINALLY got.

mythomanic
Aug 19, 2009
I was playing as a duke in the byzantine empire and I kept getting cucked by new wives. Every single time I would marry one, she'd cuck me, and then get pregnant. So I started imprisoning them, blinding, and releasing them. Now there's this weird caste in Greece of beautiful, blind, young divorcées..

UrbicaMortis
Feb 16, 2012

Hmm, how shall I post today?

Man, Spy On is fun but a little silly. I was using it to try and assassinate the heir to West Francia since the next in line is matrilineally married to my daughter. Instead I kidnapped him and just got away with keeping the king's son in prison for a few years until he died. I kind of feel there should be more consequences for that.

FeculentWizardTits
Aug 31, 2001

UrbicaMortis posted:

Man, Spy On is fun but a little silly. I was using it to try and assassinate the heir to West Francia since the next in line is matrilineally married to my daughter. Instead I kidnapped him and just got away with keeping the king's son in prison for a few years until he died. I kind of feel there should be more consequences for that.

So you're like a more competent version of this guy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bY41eD4lS28

BI NOW GAY LATER
Jan 17, 2008

So people stop asking, the "Bi" in my username is a reference to my love for the two greatest collegiate sports programs in the world, the Virginia Tech Hokies and the Marshall Thundering Herd.
I am trying to figure out why since at least Charlemagne I've had a regular instance of the HRE and Byzantine Empires merging under a single banner by like 1200

Gorn Myson
Aug 8, 2007






UrbicaMortis posted:

Man, Spy On is fun but a little silly. I was using it to try and assassinate the heir to West Francia since the next in line is matrilineally married to my daughter. Instead I kidnapped him and just got away with keeping the king's son in prison for a few years until he died. I kind of feel there should be more consequences for that.
I managed to assassinate or kidnap every single one of William the Conquerors heirs after I married my heir to his oldest daughter. He was mightily pissed off on that one day where I dragged all of the kidnapped heirs out of jail and had them executed in one go.

That loving owned. Spy On is massively overpowered, like a lot of the stuff introduced in the expansion, but its so ridiculously fun that I really hope they don't nerf it too much (they will).

Ceciltron
Jan 11, 2007

Text BEEP to 43527 for the dancing robot!
Pillbug
My last three Zunbil dukes were kidnapped and judged by zun (murdered) by a neighbouring zun duke...who was installed by their ancestor.

The AI has turned into a huge dick! This is great!

Neif
Jul 26, 2012

SeaTard posted:

Raiding, I think if I remember right it's called from on_action when a siege is completed. So just siege down everything when you raid, and you'll get it eventually.



Thanks, turns out that all I had to do was sack Paris with 4000 angry Norseman. It's funny I've never bothered to siege down provinces when raiding and would just take the easy unprotected gold then move on to the next soft target. Reason being it's usually Francia that I'm up against and couldn't contest their 3-4 thousand man stacks they'd send.

As the Emperor of Scandinavia and with no visible internal/external threats I can throw 7-8k troops at them I had no idea doing this would literally make it rain gold.

Now next goal is to have a Ruler that has done time in the Varangian Guard AND become a Viking.

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm

Bel Monte posted:

Reeducate, and release if they learn to believe in the righteous might of <INSERT RELIGION HERE>. They'll have an interesting family reunion and their parents can live with their super spy child. :unsmigghh:

In my recent "seduce everything that moves, legitimize all bastards" game, one of my eldest sons was the legitimized bastard of a Muslim Berber who stayed in the court of the Sultan. He had a plot to kill me that no one joined him in for over 20 years, and in his mid-20s he became Decadent and brought great shame to my dynasty :v:

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm

Doctor Schnabel posted:

Are any of the lifestyles particularly good at generating rivals? Short of the whole starring in cuckporn thing, obviously

Alternatively, if you take Seduction and you're the one doing the cucking, you tend to piss of a lot of husbands pretty quickly.

FairyNuff
Jan 22, 2012

So can you weaponise seduction? Like seduce someone with an STI then spread it all around europe's leaders?

Or alternatively when in control of your slow/inbred heir, spread the idiocy around to important families?

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

Inside Outside posted:

One other question: why am I not de jure drifting out of the Byzantine Empire as Georgia? I hold all of de jure Georgia, is it some dumb reason like I don't control all of Armenia?

Kingdoms no longer drift out of their de jure empires. They changed this a few patches ago.


BI NOW GAY LATER posted:

I am trying to figure out why since at least Charlemagne I've had a regular instance of the HRE and Byzantine Empires merging under a single banner by like 1200

I had this happen in my very first CK2 game, Sword of Islam wasn't even released. I played on tutorial island as king of Ireland and was slowly conquering Scotland and England. Suddenly that one county in England belonging to the HRE turned purple... :(

Sky Shadowing
Feb 13, 2012

At least we're not the Thalmor (yet)
My son came back from the Varangians blinded and castrated. So I loaded up 20,000 angry Vikings and burnt Constantinople.

I love dynamic storytelling.

If I had more time, I would have made a pit stop by Rome, but I had a few peasant rebellions that needed swatting.

GSD
May 10, 2014

by Nyc_Tattoo
Way back when, around when Sword of Islam came out, I saw a Byzantium-Russia union that meant everything west of Hungary to the edge of the map was purple.

Rumda
Nov 4, 2009

Moth Lesbian Comrade

Inside Outside posted:

One other question: why am I not de jure drifting out of the Byzantine Empire as Georgia? I hold all of de jure Georgia, is it some dumb reason like I don't control all of Armenia?

Torrannor posted:

Kingdoms no longer drift out of their de jure empires. They changed this a few patches ago.
Yeah you need an empire of your own for it to drift into.

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011

BI NOW GAY LATER posted:

I am trying to figure out why since at least Charlemagne I've had a regular instance of the HRE and Byzantine Empires merging under a single banner by like 1200
HRE is elective right? Probably means there's plenty of claims around. And on the other end the HRE probs has enough clout to enforce a weak claim on the ERE if the situation presents itself.

DivineCoffeeBinge
Mar 3, 2011

Spider-Man's Amazing Construction Company

Neif posted:



Thanks, turns out that all I had to do was sack Paris with 4000 angry Norseman. It's funny I've never bothered to siege down provinces when raiding and would just take the easy unprotected gold then move on to the next soft target. Reason being it's usually Francia that I'm up against and couldn't contest their 3-4 thousand man stacks they'd send.

As the Emperor of Scandinavia and with no visible internal/external threats I can throw 7-8k troops at them I had no idea doing this would literally make it rain gold.

Now next goal is to have a Ruler that has done time in the Varangian Guard AND become a Viking.

Once you've been Emperor of Scandanavia for a couple of years you can do even better. Just call up every levy you can get your hands on, load 'em all onto boats, and go sack Rome and/or Constantinople. Also Venice and Genoa. Get all the money.

MLKQUOTEMACHINE
Oct 22, 2012

Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice-skate uphill

DivineCoffeeBinge posted:

Once you've been Emperor of Scandanavia for a couple of years you can do even better. Just call up every levy you can get your hands on, load 'em all onto boats, and go sack Rome and/or Constantinople. Also Venice and Genoa. Get all the money.

I didn't realize how hilariously overpowered Norse raiders can be until I played a Minnesotan one in After the End. I was sailing up and down the Atlantic, hauling back thousands of gold coins to Duluth. Sacking Manhattan alone netted me, like, ~500 gold. It was nuts.

LaSalsaVerde
Mar 3, 2013

I'm so glad I finally got over how intimidating Lux Invicta is because man oh man am I having a blast destroying the Arian faith as a Priscillian Romano-Goth. The way the faiths are handled is frankly incredible.

Also, the Manichean faith being represented in LI is a refreshing change from the lazy vanilla inclusion as a Zoroastrian heresy.


e: apparently all it takes to make me happy is some good old fashioned gnosticism

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SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

Geokinesis posted:

So can you weaponise seduction? Like seduce someone with an STI then spread it all around europe's leaders?

Or alternatively when in control of your slow/inbred heir, spread the idiocy around to important families?
One of the LPs had somebody marrying off an inbred son high up into a family they didn't like. With seduce, it can be pretty ridiculous. Seduce your sister, make a ton of inbred bastards, then marry them off into the large houses of Europe to permanently mess with their leaders.

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